Attention Lazy Devs!
By
1_800_Spines,
Posted on: 2008-02-12 16:22 in CoH and CoV General Discussions
The cake needs more cow bell.
Psst..
Yah forgots tah ask those big st00pid knuckleheadz about dupin' rares for our next Vet Reward.
<shuts her eyes tight and RP wishes RLY RLY RLY hard on this one>
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And here I was going to lock the thread and send LiquidX a stern warning! 
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Ah, do it anyway. That'll learn him to poke fun!
MisterPiggins!
Comics Shaven Forums
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With the announcement of the Wedding Event, and the fact that only 100 people will be allowed in each "instance" of it, it is quite obvious that I will be unable to attend.
This is unnaceptable, as I pay 15 bucks a month, which entitles me to attend anything that I want, regardless of your so called "Technical capabilities" and "Common Sense". Since you recently upgraded the servers, it is quite obvious that the problems are all your fault, and not mine, because I pay 15 bucks a month and am therefore perfect and know much more about programming and hardware then you. Especially since I just stayed at a Holiday Inn last night, and recently switched my car insurance to Geico.
Therefore, I demand that you compensate me for this discriminatory slap in the face. What follows are my demands for suitable compensation in light of your obvious failings and social awkwardness:
1) An Ouroborous mission of the wedding, complete with "TEH MAD XP AND BLING.".
2) All badges made available to me from the very start, even ones not in the game yet, in order to show how much better I am then everyone else.
3) A Big Red Ball
4) Merge all the servers into one big server, because there are not enough people playing on this dying game. Then kick everyone else off because it will be too crowded. And I pay 15 bucks a month, and am therefore better then them.
5) FIIIIIIIIIIIVE GOL-DEN RIIIIIIIIIIIIIINGS!
6) Advance notices on any unplanned outages, server locks, or anything that will inconvenience me. Just because you all are too lazy and not geniuses like me, doesen't mean I should have to suffer for your poor planning and lack of hygeine.
7) an apology for not being as awesome and cool as I am. I know it's technically not your fault, so I'll also require an apology from your parents too.
8) A Pony, named Princess Marcian Tobay the Third Esquire Jr. I shall than hug her, and squeeze her, and call her George.
9) More Catgirls. There are not enough Catgirls in the game.
That is all of my demands. I shall expect swift payment, otherwise it is proof that you all are meanies who hate your players, and want to completly ruin a game that's not fun anyways and that I hate because I keep complaining. Also, you have cooties.
Sincerely,
Liquid Horatio X
(P.S. - SexyJay is exempt from the following demands. He is Sexy, and therefore awesome. But the rest of you are big dumb stupidheads)
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G@^#% D$@%#@^!!!!!! 
QFT
Someone sig this before I do!!!
Liquid X is STILL the [censored] in my book!!!
signed.
I'm currently picturing Sam the Eagle popping his head in this thread saying "You are all ... Weirdos!"
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Reasonable and logical.
/signed
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Agreed. List approved for immediate fulfillment.
global: @SuperSean
Undersecretary of Awesome
Thread of the eternity.
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Which reminds me, is anyone going to be jumping out of the cake-lie?
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That will be happening at the bachelor-party event on the evening of Wednesday the 13th...
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Which reminds me, is anyone going to be jumping out of the cake-lie?
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That will be happening at the bachelor-party event on the evening of Wednesday the 13th...
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I didn't get an invite to that! Maybe it was sent out by someone under level 10...
"Ben is short for Frank."
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[IMG]http://i197.photobucket.com/albums/aa10/BafflingBeerman/teamjackface1.jpg[/IMG]
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9) More Catgirls. There are not enough Catgirls in the game.
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Maybe all the Dev's should have to be catgirls at the wedding? Just to attempt to get into the good graces of your superior awesomeness?
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That's not kawaii... That's not kawaii at all. 
"But in our enthusiasm, we could not resist a radical overhaul of the system, in which all of its major weaknesses have been exposed, analyzed, and replaced with new weaknesses."
-- Bruce Leverett, Register Allocation in Optimizing Compilers
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Psst..
Yah forgots tah ask those big st00pid knuckleheadz about dupin' rares for our next Vet Reward.
<shuts her eyes tight and RP wishes RLY RLY RLY hard on this one>
[/ QUOTE ]
This thread hasn't "GONE TO TEH AMERICANS!!1!" just yet...
<checks watch>
5...4...3...2...
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8) A Pony, named Princess Marcian Tobay the Third Esquire Jr. I shall than hug her, and squeeze her, and call her George.
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And maybe the pony... 
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With the announcement of the Wedding Event, and the fact that only 100 people will be allowed in each "instance" of it, it is quite obvious that I will be unable to attend.
This is unnaceptable, as I pay 15 bucks a month, which entitles me to attend anything that I want, regardless of your so called "Technical capabilities" and "Common Sense". Since you recently upgraded the servers, it is quite obvious that the problems are all your fault, and not mine, because I pay 15 bucks a month and am therefore perfect and know much more about programming and hardware then you. Especially since I just stayed at a Holiday Inn last night, and recently switched my car insurance to Geico.
Therefore, I demand that you compensate me for this discriminatory slap in the face. What follows are my demands for suitable compensation in light of your obvious failings and social awkwardness:
1) An Ouroborous mission of the wedding, complete with "TEH MAD XP AND BLING.".
2) All badges made available to me from the very start, even ones not in the game yet, in order to show how much better I am then everyone else.
3) A Big Red Ball
4) Merge all the servers into one big server, because there are not enough people playing on this dying game. Then kick everyone else off because it will be too crowded. And I pay 15 bucks a month, and am therefore better then them.
5) FIIIIIIIIIIIVE GOL-DEN RIIIIIIIIIIIIIINGS!
6) Advance notices on any unplanned outages, server locks, or anything that will inconvenience me. Just because you all are too lazy and not geniuses like me, doesen't mean I should have to suffer for your poor planning and lack of hygeine.
7) an apology for not being as awesome and cool as I am. I know it's technically not your fault, so I'll also require an apology from your parents too.
8) A Pony, named Princess Marcian Tobay the Third Esquire Jr. I shall than hug her, and squeeze her, and call her George.
9) More Catgirls. There are not enough Catgirls in the game.
That is all of my demands. I shall expect swift payment, otherwise it is proof that you all are meanies who hate your players, and want to completly ruin a game that's not fun anyways and that I hate because I keep complaining. Also, you have cooties.
Sincerely,
Liquid Horatio X
(P.S. - SexyJay is exempt from the following demands. He is Sexy, and therefore awesome. But the rest of you are big dumb stupidheads)
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I Tabby_Cat Approve this Message!
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Alice of Malice: 36 Enrg/Nin
Gangsta Gal:24 Thugs/Poison
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Psst..
Yah forgots tah ask those big st00pid knuckleheadz about dupin' rares for our next Vet Reward.
<shuts her eyes tight and RP wishes RLY RLY RLY hard on this one>
[/ QUOTE ]
This thread hasn't "GONE TO TEH AMERICANS!!1!" just yet...
<checks watch>
5...4...3...2...
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No, I'm keeping my complaining about the V-day pack in the relevant threads.
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7) an apology for not being as awesome and cool as I am. I know it's technically not your fault, so I'll also require an apology from your parents too.
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I am so very sorry for not attaining the awesomeness that you have attained. I also apologize for my lack of coolness, as I know it doesn't approach yours.
My parents are not very computer savvy, so they are snail mailing their apologies to you. Expect it in 3 to 5 days.
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heheheheh
Johnny Butane would be so proud of your imitation him, LiquidX.
"I never said thank you." - Lt. Gordon
"And you'll never have to." - the Dark Knight
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7) an apology for not being as awesome and cool as I am. I know it's technically not your fault, so I'll also require an apology from your parents too.
[/ QUOTE ]
I am so very sorry for not attaining the awesomeness that you have attained. I also apologize for my lack of coolness, as I know it doesn't approach yours.
My parents are not very computer savvy, so they are snail mailing their apologies to you. Expect it in 3 to 5 days.
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and recently switched my car insurance to Geico.
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Don't you mean "switched my car insurance to Geko"?
Or EvilGeko, since Geko's gone...
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I switched my car insurance to Arcanaville. The coverage is great, and I get regular reports with all of the numbers about just how likely other cars are to hit me, the formulae for calculating the numbers, and suggestions on how defensive driving could be optimized to even things out.
And LiquidX, thanks for this post; I was having a lousy morning, and I really needed something to make me smile.
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5) FIIIIIIIIIIIVE GOL-DEN RIIIIIIIIIIIIIINGS!
[/ QUOTE ] Sorry they only have Five Pounds of Back Bacon to give out. Request denied.
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Four pounds of Back Bacon. Your invoice is out of date.
We do have Five golden Tooks.
And a Beer.
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3) A Big Red Ball
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Do not look directly at Big Red Ball.
Do not taunt Big Red Ball.
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Ex Libris:
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I had Sexy Jay pinned down
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I'll be in my bunk.
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bahahaha
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My parents are not very computer savvy, so they are snail mailing their apologies to you. Expect it in 3 to 5 days.
[/ QUOTE ]
...nerf snail mail!!!!
[ QUOTE ]
With the announcement of the Wedding Event, and the fact that only 100 people will be allowed in each "instance" of it, it is quite obvious that I will be unable to attend.
This is unnaceptable, as I pay 15 bucks a month, which entitles me to attend anything that I want, regardless of your so called "Technical capabilities" and "Common Sense". Since you recently upgraded the servers, it is quite obvious that the problems are all your fault, and not mine, because I pay 15 bucks a month and am therefore perfect and know much more about programming and hardware then you. Especially since I just stayed at a Holiday Inn last night, and recently switched my car insurance to Geico.
Therefore, I demand that you compensate me for this discriminatory slap in the face. What follows are my demands for suitable compensation in light of your obvious failings and social awkwardness:
1) An Ouroborous mission of the wedding, complete with "TEH MAD XP AND BLING.".
2) All badges made available to me from the very start, even ones not in the game yet, in order to show how much better I am then everyone else.
3) A Big Red Ball
4) Merge all the servers into one big server, because there are not enough people playing on this dying game. Then kick everyone else off because it will be too crowded. And I pay 15 bucks a month, and am therefore better then them.
5) FIIIIIIIIIIIVE GOL-DEN RIIIIIIIIIIIIIINGS!
6) Advance notices on any unplanned outages, server locks, or anything that will inconvenience me. Just because you all are too lazy and not geniuses like me, doesen't mean I should have to suffer for your poor planning and lack of hygeine.
7) an apology for not being as awesome and cool as I am. I know it's technically not your fault, so I'll also require an apology from your parents too.
8) A Pony, named Princess Marcian Tobay the Third Esquire Jr. I shall than hug her, and squeeze her, and call her George.
9) More Catgirls. There are not enough Catgirls in the game.
That is all of my demands. I shall expect swift payment, otherwise it is proof that you all are meanies who hate your players, and want to completly ruin a game that's not fun anyways and that I hate because I keep complaining. Also, you have cooties.
Sincerely,
Liquid Horatio X
(P.S. - SexyJay is exempt from the following demands. He is Sexy, and therefore awesome. But the rest of you are big dumb stupidheads)
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Dear LiquidX,
What you've just wrote is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent post were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this forum is now dumber for having read it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.
(P.S. - I love you! )
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At no point in your rambling, incoherent post were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought.
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Par for the course.
Incredible post, should be marked for saving by the mods for sure.
Big kudos to Posi and Ex for adding to the fun.
P.S. Liquid, can you get us more server slots please?
Questions about the game, either side? /t @Neuronia or @Neuronium, with your queries!
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Infinity Villains
Champion, Pinnacle, Virtue Heroes
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10: Fox tails god dammit.
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Indeed!
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Because I am so wise and benevolent, I will do you one better and give you all THIS!