Fun Scenario - So BAMM you wake up tommorow ...

And you find your life has been turned into a movie - you ofcourse are the protagonist of this movie / flick / piece of cinema. Prior too this awakening you are given the choice of what kind of movie you'd be in, what character you'd be. What would you choose?

For me - I'd be a loose cannon roof jumping kickboxing supercop who follows his own rules in an action sci-fi / horror buddy comedy.


EDIT - It occurs to me I need a title and possible expansion in this - hmm

Title - All Hell Breaks Loose

My Character - the loose cannon roof jumping kickboxing supercop - is a Detective (former covert ops) who has a tendency for landing weird cases. The kind where monsters climb out from the shadows and start laying waste to the city. Or subtler ones like a series of teenage girls go missing because the city's vampire population or collateral fall out from their war with the werewolves (yeah we going BIG with the cliches). Unfortunately for him, but fortuitously for the audience, he has a form of aggressive diplomacy that causes lots of collateral damage. Either way you slice it he brings the badguys down, dead, undead, or alive.

Plot: A day in the life of a kung-fu kicking bad ***. Basically framed kind of like training day where the protagonist is taking the by the book rookie on a ride along on the spooky underworld of the City which is littered with aforementioned monstrosities.

Also going the buddy-cop route, but a semi-parody. Think Lethal Weapon with Max Payne narration voice-overs, and a dose of Jackie Chan circa 1985 Hong Kong physical comedy.

My partner is someone like this.

Me, I'll be something like Tony Jaa.

And the director of photography? I can't find the right video, but the guy who captured this in flight? He had an elaborate wire rig that let him fly and film the snake from the air.

That's right. No wires for me. Wires for the cameraman.

A superhero movie, or maybe something fantasy or Star Wars-ish

Star Trek. Hopefully late TNG or DS9.

I'll settle for any of the others but man being stuck on Voyager would be lame.

Well as lame as living on one of those starships could be

Option 1: I would be GODZILLA, and then I have to go and destroy ALL THE CITIES and fight ALL THE KAIJU. ALL OF THEM.

Option 2: Nothing Is Scarier

Aldo Raine in the Sound of Music.

More seriously, I'd choose the strong, silent, stupidly-tough, world-weary gunslinger reminiscent of pulp Detectives or cowboys (Will Munny in Unforgiven). Movie itself would be an adventure film, akin to Indiana Jones or Allan Quartermain, set in the mid-late 1800's.

I wanna be Dirk Diggler...

Now on a serious note, I would want to be a super cyborg hero, with programing in all of the worlds fighting styles. So, a character like Adam Jenssen, except in a movie.

If my entire life was going to be subject to the guidelines of this movie.....?


I'd go for an animated/CG kids' action movie ala Incredibles, Kung-fu Panda, Megamind, etc.

That way I could be a cool hero and I could be fairly sure that I'll always win in the end, I'll learn important lessons that make me grow as a person, and I'll eventually get the girl, if there is one.

The most I'd have to worry about is MAYBE a close friend or parent dying at some point; but even then it wouldn't be something that would haunt me for the rest of my days. I'd make my peace with it and overcome my grief just before the big climax of whatever adventure I happen to be on at the time.

Tony Stark... that is all.

If it was my RL, it'll probably be a Jack Black comedy.

If it was my choice, a bio pic of my success or a superhero film!

I'm not ambitious. I'd enjoy a serene school life, anime style. While I wouldn't mind being a Sachiko-type (on the surface), there is too much of Sei in me.

first post edited just for the heck of it.

Oh and the Chief of Police in my flick HAS to be played by Mark Harmon!! A BadA** kickboxing supercop has to have an equally BadA** chief of police!!

It's Too Late For The Rest

Action/Sci-Fi/Fantasy/Romance/Dramedy...

I'm the struggling paranormal private investigator... I wake up, eat cold pizza, get a visit from a beautiful woman who has a compelling mystery case (that match her compelling lips), before I'm abducted by dragon-rider amazons from another planet who fall in love with me, reveal a great plot, in which I have to risk my life on a harrowing adventure to rescue some important artifact from the hands of pure evil... I talk with animals along the way... jump from one life-threatening scenario to another, visit beautiful women and their bed chambers in-between (and/or during) all of that...
And then get whisked away by the queen alien dragon-riding amazon to be king on their planet as the Earth blows up just after we leave.

And I live happily ever after.
Until the Sequel...

Preferably a harem anime where the protagonist ends up with someone.

nonsensical comedy anime, something like bobobo.

Take the Magic: The Gathering 'What Color Are You?' Quiz.

Someone suave and sophisticated. Maybe James Bond like. Able to get down and dirty but prefers to be civil.
Assigned to some world altering event but gets there a day late.
Which then puts me, James Bond, right smack at Ground Zero for the Zombie Apocalypse!

We'd fast forward a few months to me, James Bond, now the ultimate survivor, using my super vehicles and gadgets to rescue stranded refugees.

End of the movie has me leading my small army of Humans against the Alien menace that secretly launched this 'Virus' as an effcient 'Broom' to sweep away our species while leaving our tech in place.

Let's see. If I had my druther's I'd prefer to be a villain that wins at the end of the movie. Something like Ming the Merciless with a copy of the Evil Overlord list.

The Emperor Ming: Klytus, I'm bored. What play thing can you offer me today?
Klytus: An obscure body in the S-K System, your majesty. The inhabitants refer to it as the planet Earth.
Klytus: Most effective, Your Majesty. Will you destroy this Earth?
The Emperor Ming: Later. I like to play with things a while before annihilation.


If I had to end up as a hero then I'd like to be something along the lines of Christopher Walken as Gabriel in the Prophecy movies. The guy got kicked out of Heaven, kicked out of Hell, then forgiven and let back into Heaven.

Rafayel: How many more worlds have to burn before you're satisfied, Gabriel?
Gabriel: Just the one. This one.
[rips Rafayel's heart out causing him to scream from pain]
Gabriel: I'm not greedy.


Gabriel: You been with a woman, Zophael? It's like dying... you moan, cry out. You get to a spot that has you begging for release. Once, I was an Angel of Death... now, I die every day... when I have the cash.

Gabriel: In the end, there's still the word. Everywhere. In heaven with angels, the Earth and stars; even the darkest part of the human soul. It was there the word burned brightest, and for a moment... I was blinded.


Yeah a fallen angel crossed with Doctor Who, with 2 Amy Ponds as companions, a Summer Glau T-1000 Terminator instead of the robot dog, and Lacey Chabert as my Romana.

I'd go for Rom-Com.

It would involve the hero (me) dating a string of highly attractive but ultimately unsuitable ladies until after a series of improbably coincidences he meets the perfect partner. As a running-gag the hero would have an addiction for all things super hero and we would see many of the ladies dressed as heroines from major comic book franchises.


What? Much as I like action movies I don't want to be shot at

At first I was thinking about being Han from Star Wars then I forgot that things may change for me years from now with George Lucas always changing things up with a remastered edition.

I would just fear that someday my best pal would be replaced by a new CGI buddy that speaks English.

Then I was thinking a superhero would be cool but what would happen if you were rebooted with a new actor. Man this hard!

Yeah, for movie I want to live out, I'd say Rom Com is the good answer. You don't get shot at, usually, it's going to be a fun ride, and in the end, you end up with the girl after several comical misunderstandings.

Sure, being a superhero would be awesome, too, but they're usually bad on the local property and/or one's family and friends. So, a cute and funny romantic comedy would be nice.

I'd be a Pal 5/Ranger 7/Cleric 9/Wizard 11 in New York City. I know what you're thinking and the answer is, as a Cleric 9/Wizard 11, I wouldn't need no steenkin' levels in thief.

Dresden and Zatanna would have ME on speed dial.

Oh, and I'll need a lightsabre, too.