A rare glimpse at the NPC boards
By
2short2care,
Posted on: 2010-07-29 19:25 in CoH and CoV General Discussions
These are great Primal!
You and SteelClaw should have a quip-off!
Paragon Nightly News Bullitin
Greetings Citizens of Paragon City. Tonight's breaking news is the city-wide rampage of one Golden Girl from Galaxy City. So far the Police have been quiet about exactly what caused the rampage breaking through 4 different War-Walls and causing complete and utter havoc through Perez Park, Atlas Park, Steel Canyon, and ultimately spilling into the bay of Independence Port.
Eye Witnesses Report that a Hero, known only as Primal, was seen making jokes about only one NPC Critter having animated hair, thus enraging Miss Golden Girl and driving her to cause the destruction.
Miss Golden Girl's finance, Mr. Yin of Faultline, has refused to comment so far on the incident. His daughter, Penelope Yin, has also refused to comment. In a possible bit of related news, reporters asking questions of Miss Penelope Yin have been found skipping around Atlas Park in Sun-dresses.
At this time no remains of the Hero Primal have been located. A memorial service for Primal is scheduled to be held in Talos Island, and relatives state they'll scatter some ashes in the Striga Island cemetery plot.
Elsewhere in Paragon City, the Giant Squid Lusca struck again, breaking into a cargo ship docked in Independence Port. The shipping company, Dewydro Papianio Onamorrismarina, reports that nothing of considerable value was lost as the ship's only cargo consisted of pallets of Pepto Bismol and Maalox.
Lord_Recluse: All I'm sayin' is it's called "Recluse's Victory"... Is there a zone called "Statesman's Victory"? No, there isn't... Nuff said.
Tsoo_Sorcerer: So I'm in Siren's Call and fighting this hero who strayed too close. I'm like on my last slivers of health and getting ready to 'port away when this Stalker appears out of nowhere and finishes the hero off... funniest damned thing I ever saw!
Troll_Gardvard: Me am no trolling! Me am troll! Stop locking me threads!
Lord_Nemesis: Ahem..... DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!! Please, discuss.
Lead_Schocker_Outcast: Dang it! Will you trollers stop pi**ing me off?! That's the 4th keyboard I've fried this month!
SkyRaider_Porter: So, I think to myself... hey... why bother to fight them at all?
Skulls_Slammer: I'm on this PUG last night and we're standing on the street by the mission door. Would you believe our Brawler has to go and aggro a whole frickin' hero team?! And OF COURSE it ends up in a team wipe!
Hercules_Class_Titan: I don't CARE if I'm Level Pacted with him! If he doesn't delete the macro saying "And I'll form the head!" I'm breaking the pact and putting him on global ignore!
Malta_Sapper: Hey, can someone offer me an opinion on my build? I just respec'ed out of Sapper Overload in favor of getting Maneuvers... is that a good power?
Vahzilok_Embalmed: Wait a second... is it Power Proliferation if the Player Characters have to pay for it in a booster pack?
Hellion_BldBrthr_Chopper: I can't WAIT for Going Rogue!! I'm gonna side switch and join Wyvern!
My mind wanders so often you've probably seen its picture on milk cartons. - Me... the first person version of the third person Steelclaw
Yeah, I was checking those boards the other day...
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Originally Posted by Seneschal
The Strongman tried to make a clever comment: "Shouldn't WE be getting burned too?" Then the Harlequin piped up and said "Nah, it's friendly fire." I almost died laughing.
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Originally Posted by Chief Mesmerist
The trick is to position yourself with the geometry just so, so when they knock you back, they can't attack you, but you can still mez them. Works every time.
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Originally Posted by Private Security Captain
So what if we don't have powers? We're like uber-buff anyway. Your average security guard is stronger than any super hero.
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Originally Posted by Wing Talon Agent
Could the devs please do something about the cargo ship patrol missions? Doing that squatting walk all the time is making me cramp up something fierce.
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Originally Posted by Wentworth's Employee
Some hero just came over from the Merit Vendor and dumped some recipes on me, but realized they weren't level 50 yet and all thier Merits became 45s. Tell you what, some days I'm glad I'm not a combat NPC.
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Originally Posted by Midnighter
I know patrolling such a small lobby seems pointless, but don't forget what kinds of things we deal with on a daily basis. Any one of those bookshelves could turn on us.
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I hate you. This is going to bother me for... no, wait, I remember now.
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Originally Posted by GuyPerfect
Originally Posted by Private Security Captain
So what if we don't have powers? We're like uber-buff anyway. Your average security guard is stronger than any super hero. |
Check out this one
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| PPD Ghost - I hear these villains are trying to get Castle to nerf my flashbang grenades! Evil nerfherding villains! |
H: Blaster 50, Defender 50, Tank 50, Scrapper 50, Controller 50, PB 50, WS 50
V: Brute 50, Corruptor 50, MM 50, Dominator 50, Stalker 50, AW 50, AS 50
Top 4: Controller, Brute, Scrapper, Corruptor
Bottom 4: (Peacebringer) way below everything else, Mastermind, Dominator, Blaster
CoH in WQHD
Um, guys? One of the longest threads in thier forums.
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| Stickied: Consolidated "Nerf Inspires!" Thread. [first, 2, 3, 4, 5, 19, 20, last] |
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| Vahzilok_Cadaver: Can I get a Confirm pop-up for ally rezzes? My teammates keep griefing me by rezzing while they still have hero agro |
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| NPC_Frostfire: Oh, the trick to getting really good stuff in your base is to use stackable objects. You'll have to play around with the camera to get them to go ontop of each other, but it's worth it. Coalition with our VG (Contact @Frostfire or @Bedrock for an invite) and you can come see our wicked Ice Slide. |
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| NPC_Frostfire: Say, can we TURN OFF base raiding? I got an awesome base that I spent a lot of Prestige on and I'd just like it to be a little quieter. |
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| NPC_Hamidon: Wait, they changed Unyielding Stance to Unyielding? So it doesn't have the Self-Immob anymore? I can move without having to De-toggle or take Teleport? WHY DOESN'T ANYONE TELL ME THESE THINGS????!!!??? I DON'T HAVE TIME TO SEARCH THE FORUMS TO FIND THE PATCH NOTES EVERYTIME THEY DO A LITTLE PATCH I GOT A VG TO RUN!!11!111!!!!! |
Here's a few more that caught my eye:
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NPC_Master_Illusionist: Yeah, watch out for the ones that use Mind Control; if you time it right, you can Confuse them when they're trying to Confuse you, and make them use that power on their buddies! That's a riot! 
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NPC_Mary MacComber: God that gets old... sometimes I wonder if the devs think I'm a masochist! |
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NPC_Hostage_Jack Emmet: How come people keep clearing the map except for the spawn around me, and then leaving and clearing the mission through their contact? C'mon guys, what did I do? 
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Warrior_Slammer: Dang, I really want to respec to take Shield defence, it would really fit my concept build. Tank_Smasher: l0l @ RP, n00b! I PWNZ U 1I\I T4L05!! 5T00P1D L4RP3RZ!! |
Yep.
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Crazy Menders...
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Originally Posted by Mender Lazarus
Lets go back to WWII and photobomb Nemisis.
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Here's an interesting one I found.
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Originally Posted by Viva
Look Willetta, You don't need a man. Just go to your room and divide like everyone else.
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By the catapillars hooka you WILL smile!
Originally Posted by Lord Recluse
You know I left a message on Marcus's cellphone the other day and he never calls me back. Wonder why that is?
Cancel the kitchen scraps for widows and lepers, no more merciful beheadings and call off christmas!
I'm laughing my *** off here!
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That game taught me that children beating up the police requires conga music playing in the background.
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Originally Posted by Quinch
I hate you. This is going to bother me for... no, wait, I remember now.
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Here's one:
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Originally posted by Lt. Ellison: Quote:
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Mini-guides: Force Field Defenders, Blasters, Market Self-Defense, Frankenslotting.
So you think you're a hero, huh.
@Boltcutter in game.
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Hostage_Lois_Watson: I have no idea what you're talking about.
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Originally Posted by Hostage_Peter_Kent
All I can say is I'm glad the terms of service don't apply to NPCs...
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My mind wanders so often you've probably seen its picture on milk cartons. - Me... the first person version of the third person Steelclaw
[Broadcast] Slamm3r: lft standing around until someone kills us, have slammer and slicer
[Broadcast] Bucksh0t: lol who rolls minions?
[Broadcast] Br4wler: Hey, I can steal purses all day, no one thinks it's worth farming me. How many times you been to the hospital so far TODAY, Mr. Lieutenant?
[Broadcast] Slamm3r: help heros attacking
[Broadcast] Bucksh0t: Yeah, that's real likely, I'm totally stepping into that mess.
[Broadcast] Slamm3r: this game sucks it's too hard
[Broadcast] Bucksh0t: Whatever, like I said, roll something good so you can fight back. Don't be such a whiner.
[Broadcast] Sl1cer: Hey, guys, if we're all into arcane and stuff, why are we all fighting with ordinary weapons?
[Broadcast] Slamm3r: WTF this lady won't give me her purse anyone help
[Broadcast] Bucksh0t: Oh, that was super cheap, I just got sniped by someone who was flying out of range. I couldn't even target her jumping from the top of a lamp post.
[Broadcast] Sl1cer: lol who's a whiner now?
[Broadcast] DaMMed.: I avenged you, Buck! Hid around the corner from the Slicer, jumped out, FIREBALL TO THE FACE! That's how you ssss1112211sss oh geeze
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Some people are so ungrateful!
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Originally Posted by NPC_Gale Why do Heroes get 100 million influence for winning a costume contest, when I work my butt off every day for 6 inf an hour!? Not to mention the times my office has been raided and I've been held hostage! Oh sure, I get rescued, but after the 5th time, I can't get any life insurance! I got a new car yesterday, I only had it for 2 hours and it got trashed, I can't get car insurance now! Its so not fair!... ...did I mention I work in a bank? |
Overheard in Tera Volta:
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Originally Posted by Skyraider Captain
Anyone know any more good alien quotes? Nevermind! Lets all 17 of us follow that guy behind the dumpster there.
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Fixed this for you.
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Originally Posted by Steelclaw
Lord_Nemesis: They STILL believe I'm some chick named Golden Girl. Can you imagine? You would think the post count that requires 200 of me to keep up would be a hint.
...I still want animated hair for me jaegers though. |
A Guide to Champion Drama
My Videos
Ashcraft been published.
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Originally Posted by Wing_Raider8147
I was already feeling pretty dodgy when I noticed that all the heroes had these bright reddish bubbles and none of our guys did, but then while we were waiting on the upper ramp to go in, I asked him what we were going to do next after we took out the reactor.
"Well," he says, "the reactor explodes, you know." And I'm all WTF and just when WAS he planning to share THAT little tidbit of info with us and he just shrugged and said, "Orders are orders. Ours is not to reason why..." and I told him to reason THIS and got the Hell out of Dodge. |
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Originally Posted by Vanguard_Security_OfficerP_I
No, I was EXTREMELY polite and respectful with Borea, but she started with the snide remarks and "Oh, aren't you the special one, poor baby, boo-hoo" attitude. But what is the point to it all?
Every time anyone comes to the door, I dutifully say, as ordered, "Step over here, Hero_Name. I need to check your clearance." And they always blow me off! And I am supposed to ask EVERYONE EVERY TIME they enter. What ARE we supposed to do if they DID show us their I.D. and it WAS wrong? Arrest them? Yeah, right. |
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Originally Posted by Vanguard_Security_OfficerA_P
Well, by the time they get to MY door, the level 50s are already pretty testy. Guess what, so am I. I hear all the Broadcast chatter in Atlas Park, too, and it gets on MY nerves as well. But I am ALWAYS polite, unlike some of those "I Am All Level 50" types.
And YOU don't have to say, "I'm the Vanguard Security Officer, Hero_Name," each time. Some of them go by 3 or 4 times a day. They roll their eyes and say, "I KNOW who you are!" |
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Originally Posted by Vanguard_Security_OfficerP_I
No, what they say to ME is "Check THIS clearance!" and start in with Freezing Rain or Ignite Patch."
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"How do you know you are on the side of good?" a Paragon citizen asked him. "How can we even know what is 'good'?"
"The Most High has spoken, even with His own blood," Melancton replied. "Surely we know."
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Yeah, like, totally... same thing happened to me last weekend...
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Originally Posted by Hellions_Girlfriend
And I was all like "Ohmigawd what do you mean those guys are Skulls?!"
And she was all like "Yeah, totally... yer like with the wrong boyfriend chika"... like all up in my face and stuff... I know, like, totally immature, right? But I was SO totally embarassed... like plaid pants and print shirt embarassed... then I realized I was, like, in Kings Row and not Atlas Park... and I TOTALLY, like, missed my stop on the train... And the worst thing... like, the guy I thought was my boyfriend was, like, wearing this skull mask... so I couldn't even tell if he was, like, killer cute! If I coulda specced his vize I could have like, went all Going Rogue and switched sides for him... |
My mind wanders so often you've probably seen its picture on milk cartons. - Me... the first person version of the third person Steelclaw
A new one from the Hellions' forum.
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Originally Posted by Blood_Brother
The following powersets need to be nerfed... ALL of them!
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to 
TO THE END!Villains are those who dedicate their lives to causing mayhem. Villians are people from the planet Villia!
Gee so much for gratitude.
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| NPC Shakedown_Victim: Oh I just say something like "Youre my new favorite hero." give them some money and then they go away. |
What, you think the forums are just for us? Let's see what the other players in City of are talking about. Hey, they're free to view, if anyone else sees some interesting topics feel free to add them.
Let's start with the Civilian section.
*digs*
Can you believe people actually WANT to wear these? Bah, now I have to walk over there.
*pulls*
Yes sir, this sure is sexy.
...Whatever, man, Teen Rating Schmeen Rating. They just fall down anyway, it's not like we can actually do it.
Hey, this is fun, let's all do it!
Oh wait!
lolololol