Doom McLean

A long, long time ago...
I can still remember
When the ITF used to make me smile.
And I knew if I had my chance
That I could do the monkey dance
And, maybe, grind some merits for a while.

But Issue 13 made me shiver
With every revamp they'd deliver.
Bad news was the dev's fault;
I couldn't roll one more alt.

I can’t remember if I cried
When I read about the nerfs they'd hide,
But something touched me deep inside
The day when CoH died.

So bye-bye, to the PvP guys.
Suppression just won't lessen,
And the game feels stale and dry.
And the good old devs had to be drinkin’ whiskey and rye
Singing "maybe now my dom won't die."
"maybe now my dom won't die."

Did you write an AE arc,
And did it get flamed with bad marks,
Because the farmers made it so?
Do you believe in chinese gold,
For just $12.99 or your mortal soul,
And can you teach me how to not make my stoner real slow?

Well, I know that you’re in love with Kins
`cause I saw you begging for SB from him.
You both got kicked from the team.
Man, I dig that colored FREEEEEEEEM!.

I was a lonely soloist AV killer
With a Brute or MM, no need for fillers
But these changes made me laugh as much as a movie with Ben Stiller
The day that CoH died.

I started singin’,
"bye-bye, to those PvP guys."
Suppression just won't lessen,
And the game feels stale and dry.
Them good old boys had to be drinkin’ whiskey and rye
And singin’, "maybe now my dom won't die.
"maybe now my dom won't die."

Now for five years we’ve been playing this game
And now the content seems kind of lame,
But that’s not how it used to be.
When Sexy Jay made costumes fit for a king and queen,
And leather coat so we could make a homage to james dean
A voice of thanks came from you and me,

Oh, and while Positron went AFK,
A PvP'er ganked him and called him (HEY!).
Pillboxes still got farmed;
But no other players were harmed.
And while Castle read some posts and threads,
BAB laughed and shook his head,
And our expectations were misled
The day that CoH died.

We were singing,
"bye-bye, to those PvP guys."
Suppression just won't lessen,
And the game feels stale and dry.
Them good old boys had to be drinkin’ whiskey and rye
And singin’, "maybe now my dom won't die.
"maybe now my dom won't die."

Blasters, Scrappers and Malta Sappers.
Fusionette's a twit and you couldn't help her,
From taking damage and falling fast.
Then they nerfed that poison gas.
After players had proc'd it out the (REMIX!),
With the villain side market in a cast.

Now the forums are filled with impending DOOOOOOM!
While the mods caught a migrane or two.
Some posters could freely flame,
While others took all the blame!
Farming players were in high demand;
And Lighthouse may or may not have been canned.
Do you recall who else got banned
The day that CoH died?

We started singing,
"bye-bye, to those PvP guys."
Suppression just won't lessen,
And the game feels stale and dry.
Them good old boys had to be drinkin’ whiskey and rye
And singin’, "maybe now my dom won't die.
"maybe now my dom won't die."

Oh, and there we were all on one team,
An MLRSF with no debuffs or freem
With no time left to restart again.
So come on: jack might be a jerk, jack might be a dick!
But Jack made this game, we should all admit.
Cause flaming him doesn't do us any good.

Oh, and as I watched Castle on a forum page
About how he was going to eventually nerf rage.
But that patch was reverted
Disaster was averted.
And as the flaming posts climbed high into the night
Because complaining is our only right,
I saw Mod 8 swing his ban-hammer with delight
The day that CoH died

He was singing,
"bye-bye, to those PvP guys."
Suppression just won't lessen,
And the game feels stale and dry.
Them good old boys had to be drinkin’ whiskey and rye
And singin’, "maybe now my dom won't die.
"maybe now my dom won't die."

I once talked to War Witch in game
And thanked her for not being lame,
She just smiled and turned away.
I went down to the gaming store
Where I’d bought time cards years before,
But the man there said WoW was the game I should play.

And in i16: the farmers screamed,
The RP'ers cried, and the carebears dreamed.
But not a word was spoken;
For was the CoP was still broken.
And the three men I admire most:
The Castle, BAB, and that Widow Ghost,
They're still making the game by the San Fran coast
The day that CoH died.

And they were singing,
"bye-bye, to those PvP guys."
Suppression just won't lessen,
And the game feels stale and dry.
Them good old boys had to be drinkin’ whiskey and rye
And singin’, "maybe now my dom won't die.
"maybe now my dom won't die."

They were singing,
"bye-bye, to those PvP guys."
Suppression just won't lessen,
And the game feels stale and dry.
Them good old boys had to be drinkin’ whiskey and rye
And singin’, "maybe now my dom won't die.
"maybe now my dom won't die."

-Rolling applause from the robotic legions of doom-

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zwillinger GG, I would tell you that "I am killing you with my mind", but I couldn't find an emoticon to properly express my sentiment.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Captain_Photon NOTE: The Incarnate System is basically farming for IOs on a larger scale, and with more obtrusive lore.

Very good

I think your parody is better than Weird Al's parody of that song... Nice writin'!

"Alien"

Quote:

Originally Posted by Infernus_Hades The way you play changes your IO slotting..

hahaha that was hilarious! Cutest DOOOOOOOOOOOM song evah!!!
I actually read it slowly and to the beat. Good jorb!

I'll give it a 98. It's got a good beat and you can dance to it.

Very doomish i like it.

I love this song, so I sang most of it out loud. Very clever. Well done, Reiraku!

Awesome work! I give it four out of five crusts.

--NT

Pure win Rei.

Also /Killo

O.O *fap fap fap fap fap fap*

Freaking amazing... very nice indeed... I give you Kudos, 9 out of 10 stars and a rare Lithuanian pre-moistened Lollipop.

******* awesome

*Claps*

Very, very good.

Pretty good, R. Shame you couldn't keep to the syllable-count, but good stuff all the same.

Eco

Quote:

Originally Posted by Samuel_Tow [The Incarnate System is] Jack Emmert all over again, only this time it's not "1 hero = 3 white minions" it's "1 hero = 3 white rocks."

Very good

"You got to dig it to dig it, you dig?"
Thelonious Monk

Well done.

*slow claps*

Thank you, Rei. I can now die happily.

I guess this is relevant again.