Valentine's Advice Sought from the Ladies ...

... though guys can chime in too. ;-)

I have this ... friend. Let's call him "CK."

Now "CK" likes this girl he knows, but he can't seem to make the leap from LJBFs to potential romantic interest. She just doesn't seem him as a guy she would date ...


Well, okay. She just sees him as a couple of eyes and a brain floating in lime jello on top of a big rusty metal chassis, but ...

He's tried all the usual things to impress a girl ... shower her with gifts-- how many other girls do you know in Paragon who have wind up guardians?!-- try to help out her Dad by lending aid to some heroes-- prove his devotion by leading an army of his faithful minions to rescue her from the Rikti ...

But she just don't seem interested...

So what do you think, ladies? Is "CK" stuck forever in the friends' zone or is there any way he can change her mind about him ... short of mental coercion or altering time with a Psychronometron?

Valentine's Day is fast approaching! "CK" could use some new ideas!

A woman looks for many things in a man, a real man anyways.

A woman needs a friend, from the one she loves.

I have never understood why boys only think with their *&#@.

The friend zone isn't that bad.

/rawr

I'm pretty damn sure CK isn't thinking with that part. At least, not anymore. Tell him he needs to give her some space. Plus, she's kinda young. Give her time, and room, and go from there. Plus, cleaning up his act can't hurt.

I think that Penny is just too young to think about settling down...

...unfortunately for CK she'll never get any older though

I think being a good friend to someone else is more important, than anything else.

Valentines day is coming up? 1 white rose.

Okay, neither I nor Kid Eros are ladies, but in an unpublished Kid Eros story, the gentleman I think you have in mind is about to make an even bigger mess of this relationship than it is already (if such is possible). Trying to explain that he's smothering the girl, Kid Eros tells him, "Part of love is unselfishness. Look past your pain and think of [this girl]’s feelings."

Later on, he muses, ". . . love isn’t always destined to go on happily ever after. The pain was real enough, wasn’t it? . . . They don’t call it a 'crush' for nothing."

Basically, Kid Eros would advise "CK" to recognize that he might be stuck forever in the Friendzone, regardless of the depth of his feelings, but if he really loves this girl, he should be the best friend he possibly can. Yes, it's undoubtedly agonizing for "CK," but that doesn't make it any less true.

So, basically, the same thing everyone else has said.

Personally, I'd give the real person in the same situation much the same advice, with an additional suggestion to pursue someone else rather than jam the knife in his heart any further. In this case, though, the whole "brain in a jar" thing complicates the entire matter.

***

Sheesh, I can't believe I just wrote a serious discussion of crushes about a fictional character who's a floating brain. Sometimes, my own geekiness astounds me . . . :3

CK should let her know that he's not like the other boys only interested in her body. He should let her know he likes her for her mind.

I heard this girl was developing a crush on the trainer in Kings Row.

How about giving her some space. CK sounds a tad bit on the clingy side, some breathing space in a relationship is always good. If he could CK would probably put her in a glass jar or something

CK should roll out the big guns on the Rikti in the war zone as a sign of his love.

Maybe he'll gain some Rikti improvements for his minions to really impress her.

I'm sure that if CK kidnapped her, held her hostage and ran enough experiments on her she would eventually learn to love him or he'd find a way to rewire her into thinking she did... Chicks dig those kind of grandiose, over the top gestures!

Brainwashing is also good,for those "difficult" ones.

CK is a creepy stalker. I think his lady friend should dismantle him. >_>

One question:
LJBF?

Speaking from experience...

If you're interested in someone, you need to let them know.

Both sexes can be oblivious at times, and it may take a "swift kick" to get them to realize, "Hey, I think s/he likes me!"

Now this can be a double edged sword. On the one hand, you could get shot down in the friend flames. On the other hand, you could expand your friendship into something truly beautiful. Thing is, if it's never going to get out of the friend zone... and you're so bent out of shape into wanting to marry this person, it's far better to find out now. Because if it's the perpetual Friend Zone (queue Twilight Zone Music) then you'll save yourself a lot of heartache and pain. If they're just not that into you, then GET. OUT. If you're in love with them, then the Friend Zone will literally drain the life from you.

If you get tongue tied when confronting your feelings to the person in question, there's always letter writing. And I Mean Letter Writing. E-mail doesn't speak "effort", and can seem rather half-a**ed. Just do yourself a favor and don't send them the first draft. Write your feelings out, how they make you feel, then wait for a few days before proofreading it.

Hindsight will always make things out for what they are, and if the letter sounds really bloody lame three days later, it's time for a rewrite.



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Now. For those ladies who simply do not understand why men "think with their other brain"... You just wait till you hit 30, girls. You'll be checking out guys (or girls) ten years younger than you, noticing hard butts far more often and become just as obsessed with the act as we are. The ironic twist on life and sex, is that men hit their hormonal peak between 18 and 20. Women on the other hand hit theirs between 29 and 31.

You don't believe me? Ask your OB/GYN. *taps foot*


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