Was I in the wrong here?

He was a tit, simple as that.

Don't worry about it, life throws these idiots into the mix every now and then (but I have to admit that it would irk me to be put on someone's ignore list underservedly, even a grade A wazzock like him).

I feel your angst.

Not going to say anything here that hasn't already been said, but there's definitely fault on both sides.

Generally, I have all of my characters hidden from searches. I don't care for tells asking for a team or begging to join mine, so I avoid it where possible. I'm not going to go so far as to call it rude, but I definitely see it as the CoH equivalent of the telemarketer. I certainly wouldn't go so far as to tear a strip off the OP for asking to join a team, but then I probably would simply ignore (not /ignore) him and move on.

I'm not a big fan of teaming to begin with- things tend become nothing more than a big blur of coloured power effects and noise when there's a lot of people on a team, and generally goes faster than I like, or slower than I like, but never really the right speed. I stick to soloing or to small teams, no larger than 4, and almost always comprised of SG members. I know what I'm getting into, they know what they're getting into, and it's generally good fun for all of us. Inviting from outside just ruins the dynamic when it's just a group of 4 friends, all in it to mess around for a little while, and I do resent it when people try to shoehorn themselves into it.

That's not to say I don't play the game with groups. I will, on occasion, grab a pick-up TF or join a group on the Victory Forum channel, but even then it's mostly not a situation where begging to join my team will help since they're largely either TFs, or full up. Or both. Team begging just doesn't make sense to me, since even assuming every single player in the game were on a 7 man team, you only have a 1 in 7 chance of getting the leader, meaning that the odds are that you're pestering the wrong person. Factor in the fact that a lot of players prefer soloing, that some players prefer to stick with the tried and true, and that some teams are going to be full or TFs, just makes me feel like a team beggar is a person who would rather grind at the odds that spend a few minutes to build their own team.

Frankly, on some server, the teaming can come slowly, and you need to get proactive if that's how you enjoy playing the game, in a team setting.

Personally, I don't ask people to team with me. And I don't like forming teams. But i team alot. I join about every gloable chat channel i can get in on, be it badge channles, LFT channels, bullcrapping channels, and just keep my ears open so to speak and find a team doing something that intrests me eventually. Or i solo, which i also enjoy.

But i bare no ill will towards people how are more proactive then i am when they'er looking for a team that can be hard to find. And i also don't feel guilty telling them, "sorry bud, i'm soloing right now". Cause it's the truth, and it's a responce, instead of dead silience like alot of people must get, cause just about everyone thanks me for responding...

As for the OP. That dude was in the wrong. Prolly having a bad day IRL, and let it carry over into the game. (I try and give everyone the benefit of the doubt.) Don't sweet him.

Thanks to those who replied to my query, pretty much the answers I expected. I was more interested in why, if someone fell into the right level and had an AT you could use and you had space, you would automatically reject them because they asked.

And cos tone isn't transferred across the internet, I'm more curious than anything. I'm not trying to change your mind, just understand where you are coming from. I personally don't start teams very often but will accept members who message me if I'm in the mood to team.

It's a question of baseline assumptions. Unless you know otherwise, you have to assume that any solo player is potentially willing to team and any team could potentially use one more. The tools to inform prospective tellers otherwise already exist in the form of search comments and team seek settings and even, at an extreme, hide settings. If a person does not take the steps necessary to warn off or ward off potential tellers, then that person has no leg to stand on to complain. You exist in a public place, and you can't expect people to assume you're not to be disturbed.

Secondarily, it's communication. It exists for a reason - to transfer information from one person to another. People who do not wish to be involved in active communication should take the steps to passively communicate that via the tools provided. But even then, this IS a public setting. Expect to be approached, expect to be interacted with. Neither hide nor search comments will save you from that. If you cannot handle inter-personal communication, then do not log into the game. Logging in with a certainty that you won't experience it is akin to walking out in the street expecting no-one will ever talk to you. You will be wrong every time. Cab drivers, bus drivers, beat cops, hot dog vendors, just random people asking the time or directions. Expect it, be prepared for it, and don't blow up when someone approaches you.

I happen to work with students. Against my will, completely, but that's my job. I haven't been trained for it (*sigh*), but it is what it is. I find the best approach to dealing with people, any people at all, is to simply not get emotional, address what they're approaching you for and move on. If someone asks to join your team and you would never consider it, say no. If two dozen people ask you, say no two dozen times. Or say nothing not even once. But it is uncalled for and, more than anything, unjustifiable to unload on random strangers because someone ELSE annoyed you.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Arcanaville Samuel_Tow is the only poster that makes me want to punch him in the head more often when I'm agreeing with him than when I'm disagreeing with him.

I'm really not a big fan of "reverse invites", to me it's akin to walking up to a stranger's table at McDonalds and having a seat. That being said, this guy overreacted a bit. Can't say for sure if he was really a jerk or just had his fill for the day- theres no real way to know if he's always like that, or if you were the 217th person to ask him that hour.

Sending tells to join an existing level appropriate team is just one other way of organising teaming imo.

Until we get thet "team lfm" selection, it going to stay that way.

The restaurant tables analogy doesnt really work. It's more like knocking on people's doors and asking if they have room for you to stay. You have no idea if they have a spare bedroom, you have no idea what they're up to, but you come along and ask anyway, hoping someone will say sure stay.

Were you in the wrong? No.
Was the other person a jerk? Most definitely.

FYI, my opinion is similar to that of the obnoxious person. I'm not keen on people 'inviting themselves'. Therefore, I always decline. But I do so POLITELY.

I have no problem with someone joining my team. But then again, I spend about 80% of my time in-game working on MA arcs, so it's usually sort of boring for whoever joins me.

"I'm working on mission 2... could you go back and proofread mission 1 for typos?"

I don't really get where the whole "inviting themselves" thing comes from. There's a difference between demanding an invite and asking if a team is full/LFM.

Before work this morning, I was on a smallish team that tried to fill the group but couldn't. We ended up going into the mission anyway. A team member mentioned that they got a tell from someone asking to join, and then I got the same tell shortly after. I guess I made the mistake of saying that they sent me a tell as well, because our leader decided not to invite since they were "bugging people." I didn't get what the big deal was. I mean, I bet you anything nobody sent a reply back so the person sending tells had no feedback to work with. Plus, it was... 5am, and it was a mid-30s alt sending tells to people in the low 40s. Sometimes I think people need to chill the **** out.