(part 2)
Um, excuse me?
Dorothy looked up from her rapid typing to see a tall blonde heroine wearing all white. She had a rather impressive looking wand in one hand that seemed to be leaking dark purple energy of some sort. She had a bubble of blue energy surrounding her and her eyes were blazing with white energy as well.
The RPers who lurk under Atlas sent me a tell. They said there was someone new out here in need of help. But before I help you I need to know something; are you a good newb or a bad noob?
Good newb or bad noob? Dorothy typed. Is that like a kind of archetype I havent heard about? Im a defender.
Never mind, you just answered my question, the other toon said, the name over its head was GlitterGoodKheld. You need help, but unfortunately Im logging in five minutes or so. I have a friend who can help you, but he refuses to help new people one at a time. Youll need a group of at least five before hell consider exemplaring down from 50 to 2. Go get some other schleps.. er
players who need help, then go to Galaxy City. He usually hangs out by Back Alley Brawler. He looks like a big reptile wearing a jesters uniform in every color imaginable. His name is the Lizard of Odd.
Dorothy tried to get more information but a Quitting in countdown had appeared above Glitters head and soon she was gone. Meanwhile a small group of heroes, who had been listening to the conversation with intense interest and speaking tells to each other, surrounded her. Most had super speed and soon were circling her in a dizzying bright pattern.
(Singing)
(Griefers)
Come out, come out the whole griefer crew
And tease the defender who is such a newb
She is squeaky clean, still smelling brand new
And Glitter just told her what she has to do
<Glitter just told her what she has to do>
She still looks concerned, she still looks confused
And since we sense weakness
Shell soon be abused
(Dorothy)
Im really not so very weak. The reason is just this.
This just is my first time. My team mates playing Mime.
Im only trying out this game to unwind.
So please, be kind. Im sure that you will find.
It is fun to be helpful
leave griefing far behind.
(Griefers)
But oh, your begging is divine!
This is just her first time. With her doggy-style canine!
Fell victim to our insult rhyme
In a hostile playing clime
Climb out of your whine and please dont waste our time
Keep your noobie grime; heres a clue where is our dime?
Now were all done being kind!
(Song done)
They began to close in on the frightened Dorothy and the growling TaTa, when some of the more friendly Atlas lurkers came in and scattered the griefers. These people turned out to be much more helpful and walked Dorothy through getting the star from TaTa as well as basic instructions on how to invite other newbs to the team. They were RPers for the most part, so felt compelled to send her off with a song to bolster her spirits as well as remind her of what she was supposed to be doing in the first place.
Nice or not, they had quickly realized Dorothy wasnt too bright.
(Singing)
Gather an all-newbie crew. Gather an all-newbie crew.
Gather, gather, gather, gather,
Gather an all-newbie crew.
Gather an all-newbie, gather an all-newbie,
Gather an all-newbie crew.
Youre off to see the Lizard. The mighty tank Lizard of Odd.
Youll find he is a whiz of a Liz. A Paragon Wiki god!
If ever oh ever a sage there was, the Lizard of Odd is one because
Because, because, because, because, because!
His forum posts all cause a buzz!
Youre off to see the Lizard. The wonderful Lizard of Odd!
(song done)
She and TaTa set off to wander around Atlas Park. They mostly ran from the various Hellions they saw, though TaTa occasionally would imprison many of them in stone cages to facilitate escape. Eventually they found themselves in a small walled park amidst the tall buildings. A female NPC was standing on a small hill within it, but what caught Dorothys attention was a prone figure hero on the ground at her feet.
Pardon me, she typed. But why is your name orange instead of blue?
Give me a spare Yellow and Ill tell you, came the reply.
Well, it took a bit for her to understand what a spare yellow was but soon she had traded one of her few inspirations and the hero, whose name was FlareCrow climbed to his feet.
Thanks, that piece of ground was getting boring to stare at after ten minutes and I refuse to go to the hospital one more time today. I swear the nurses were doing a laugh emote the last time. The man was weaving around like he was drunk, leading Dorothy to wonder if that was his problem. Finally he dropped to one knee. Im a fire/fire blaster, what are you?
Storm defender, she replied. So youre dying a lot? Weve been running away mostly.
Yeah, followed by a scowly face, My hit points suck, but all blasters have that problem.
So why do you keep dying?
Because I cant hit <BLEEP>!
(Singing)
I could be the king of blasters,
The top AoE master
The ruler of the flame!
My heart it is a yearnin
To see my enemies a burnin
If I only had the aim.
Id set all my foes to crackle
Free myself of debts cruel shackle
For myself Id make a name
My levels would mount faster
A living fire disaster
If I only had the aim.
Oh I, would fill the sky, with deadly falling sparks
I would burn the trees but leave behind the bark
And then Id nuke, and light the dark!
I would not be a face planter, a woeful sad blues chanter,
My heart all full of shame
I would laugh and Id be flyin, while my foes were busy dyin
If I only had the aim.
(Song done)
My mind wanders so often you've probably seen its picture on milk cartons. - Me... the first person version of the third person Steelclaw
(part 3)
She explained about going to see the Lizard who would guide them through learning the ins and outs of the game then sent him an invite which he gladly accepted. They traveled for a time and things were a little better. They even managed to gain a level each with TaTa immobilizing the Hellions and FlareCrow punching them with brawl. He had tried blasting them but every flare he threw went wide, so eventually he gave up and fell back on punching the immobile gang members.
They had ventured into the warehouse district of Atlas Park where the enemies were much tougher, most of them purples to the timid little team. As they stared across a parking lot at a mob of six purple Vahzilok, including two Embalmed and a Mortificator, they stared as a single hero charged.
He was wearing armor of gleaming steel and wielding what looked like a lumberjacks axe in one hand. He hit the mob running while bellowing a war cry. The Vahzilok were on him like flies on a pupu platter. Within moments his name had turned orange and he had fallen, half buried under a parked car. The Vahzilok all wandered off, laughing, the Embalmed looking disappointed they hadnt even had time to blow up.
Dorothy and the others walked over to the hero, whose name read Steel LumberJack, reaching him just in time to see him wobble unsteadily to his feet.
Wow, you die even faster than I do, FlareCrow said admiringly.
Be nice, Dorothy reprimanded. Pardon me, Jack, but dont you think attacking a mob that size by yourself is dangerous?
Im a tank! Jack said dispiritedly. Tanks are supposed to take on entire groups by themselves! But I barely get started before my health bar completely depletes and next thing I know Im face down again.
Oh, thats too bad, said Dorothy in commiseration.
Yark! Yark! TaTa agreed.
(Singing)
As a tank Im really tryin, to fight and not keep dyin
It really makes no sense.
Cant blame it on the lag though, its all because of aggro
And my lackluster defense.
Id be a taunting tanker charmer, a genius of the armor
Instead Im feeling dense
Be it lethal or just smashing, my health will soon be crashing
From my lackluster defense.
Imagine me
endangered team
Around us Malta throng
I let loose with an awesome taunting song
A battle din
Pure win!
Just to stand within the battle, beat them off like chattel
No more watching from the fence
I could be brave and protective
Instead Im tank-defective
With my lackluster defense.
(Song done)
Needless to say, he joined them instantly when he heard about someone willing to teach newbies a few secrets about the game. They decided to head back to the Atlas statue to search up their last team mate. The warehouses were just too dangerous and, they were forced to admit, they were pitifully unprepared to take them.
As they sprinted up the sidewalk outside the fence surrounding city hall they stopped to watch a strange site. It was a cat girl. This wasnt too unusual, since theyd seen at least 200 cat girls since arriving in Atlas Park, no, what was strange was the actions she was performing. There were two first level Hellion minions trying to steal a purse from a woman. The cat girl, whose name was Im Lyon, would start to charge the pair then stop suddenly before backing up again to a safer distance. This strange ritual repeated itself several times as they all stared.
Finally FlareCrow could stand it no longer. What in the bleeding heck are you doing?
Ack! Oh, sorry. Im just trying to build up the nerve to go in there and defeat these two thugs, thats all. Ill do it
eventually.
But youre third level and theyre only first, Jack noted. They should be conning green to you. And arent you a scrapper? A scrapper should be tearing up green minions as though they were Paris Hilton in a paparazzi feeding frenzy.
Well, Im sure I could beat them, Lyon hedged. But, you see, my friend and I made a bet to see who could advance their toon to the highest level before dying the first time. Now Im so worried about losing the bet I cant work up the courage to attack anyone who doesnt con gray.
Wow, thats intense, Dorothy said. What did you bet?
Umm
you wouldnt be interested in that
er
hey! How about I sing a song to distract you
ACK! I mean
to entertain you?
(Singing)
Let me tell ya, Miss Defender
I feel like a wet-ender
No shark here, just a shrimp
Yeah, my courage is in decline
Im more mouse than I am feline
As a scrapper; Im a wimp
Yeah, this bet has done belayed me
Neutered and/or spayed me
My great build it now is gimped
Id be a big wager winner
(Jack)
Id be a pro mob thinner
(Flare)
Id be an AoE spinner
(Dorothy)
If the Lizard is a wizard whos all pimped
(In series)
Then Im sure to get some aim
Defense
Some Fun
De-Wimped!
(together)
Were off to see the Lizard
The wonderful Lizard of Odd..
We hear he is a whiz of a Liz
A Paragon Wiki god!
If ever oh ever a sage there was
The Lizard of Odd is one because
Because, because, because, because, because
Because his forum posts cause a buzz!
Were off to see the Lizard
The Wonderful Lizard of Odd!
(song done)
My mind wanders so often you've probably seen its picture on milk cartons. - Me... the first person version of the third person Steelclaw
(finale)
After Lyon had joined them they realized they had the requisite five members and pranced off the to the train depot to catch a ride to Galaxy City. They made their way to the center of the city to stand beside Back Alley Brawler, looking around for the great Lizard.
They spotted him in the distance but were distressed to see his name was grayed out and an AFK floating above his head. They walked over and stood beside him, debating among themselves as to whether or not they should wait for him to come back or go do some street sweeping. They were distracted by a small group of mid-level characters who were serving no purpose other than to provide a chorus for the next song.
They seemed unusually cheerful about the whole thing and FlareCrow privately suspected the players were all drunk. This WAS the Pinnacle server after all.
(Singing)
Ha-ha-ha, Ho-ho-ho
therell be no more woe-begones!
Thats how we play the day away in the mighty Paragon!
Buzz-buzz-buzz
clank-clank-clank
hear the clockwork song!
Its the sound that tells us when to fight in the mighty Paragon!
We slave at work and rush right home when done
Grab fast food then to computer run
For CoH Fun!
Blast-blast-blast
Kill-kill-kill til the bad guys are all gone
Thats how we heroes win the day in the mighty Paragon!
Tank-tank-tank
Taun-taunt-taunt all the aggro drawn
Thats how you keep your team alive in the mighty Paragon!
You can buff your teammates so they win the crown!
(Dorothy)
Can I even snow my foes to slow them down?
(Chorus member)
Uh-huh
(Dorothy)
Jolly old town!
(Chorus)
Slash-slash here, Stab-stab there
When scrapper lock is on
Watch the bad guys all fall in despair in the mighty Paragon!
Ha-ha-ha
Ho-ho-ho
Ha ha ha ha haaaa
Thats how we heroes save the day in the MIGHTY PARAGON!
(Song ends)
Are you guys finished? Ive been back at my keyboard for five minutes now.
Dorothy and the others whipped around to see the Lizard watching them with an aura of bored resignation, or it might have been Invulnerability.
You must be the defender Glitter sent me the tell about. Okay then, I can help you out with one problem each, then I have to go help some of my SG mates with a farm in Peregrine.
Wait
Dorothy said slowly, somewhat confused. Arent you going to send us on some kind of dangerous, nearly impossible, mission against a nearly unbeatable foe to retrieve a unique object before youll help us?
There was a long pause.
Didnt Glitter tell you that I LIKE helping new players? See, it may just be me, but it seems that making you jump backwards through flaming hoops for my own sick entertainment would be the opposite of helping. What kind of jerk do you think I am?
Dorothy just stared at him for a long silent moment. Finally Jack stepped forward, pushing the stunned defender out of the way.
Okay then, while Dorothy wrestles with your logic, Ill ask my question first. Im a tank but I die any time I go against larger mobs. One or two opponents I can handle without any problem but more than that and Im losing health faster than Im doing damage. What should I do, Mr. Lizard?
Hold on, lemme look at your build, Lizard said then was silent for a moment. Dude, WTF? Youve got nothing but secondaries selected. Youve got three axe attacks. The only primary you took was your first level mandatory one and thats an Auto instead of a Toggle so youre getting a lower protection from it!
Well, I wanted to be able to attack, Jack said lamely. And I was afraid a toggle would drain all my endurance.
Then you can slot with endurance reductions, the Lizard said in disgust. Or you can use the old tanker trick of using your health as your endurance. If you pick the right powers and slot properly then you can just stand in the center of a mob and use your lightest attacks to keep their attention. Just hang loose until your endurance climbs; youll have plenty of protection and health to keep you safe while you wait. Here, take this, you nickel plated nincompoop
its a respec recipe. Make this and then redo your build and this time pick out some strong defense and dedicate slots to it!
My turn! FlareCrow leapt forward. Im a blaster and I cant hit anything. I could throw a fireball at a field of dry grass and still miss. Im lucky I can burn oxygen. Please oh mighty Odd. You are my lord and leech and I besmirch your help in this matter of great importance. What should I do?
First of all, never become an RPer
you suck at it. Second, dont ever create a character on Virtue if you want to survive. As far as hitting things though, what kind of enhancements do you have slotted?
Enhancements? FlareCrow followed this with a frowny face, though whether in response to the question or the criticism of his RPing skill was unclear.
Yes, enhancements, Lizard said, groaning to himself. Let me guess
you didnt read any of the windows in the Tutorial?
Eh, I skipped the tutorial, FlareCrow scoffed. I dont want to read, I want to PLAY!
Yeah, great plan, Lizard said. Okay.. fine
here, take this five thousand influence and go talk to the lady wearing the red and white pajamas over there. She sells little circles of different colors, you want the yellow ones that have the number ten on them. Get enough to put one or two in every attack power you have. When you get them just click on Enhancements and then on Manage. Each button fits in a hole. Have fun.
He turned to Lyon, since Dorothy still looked bewildered. Whats your story.
Oh! Um, I made a bet with my friend to see how far we could each get our characters in levels without dying. Now Im too worried about losing the bet to fight anything stronger than a grey. What do you suggest I do, Lizard?
How about growing a pair?
Huh?
Listen, this is a game Lyon, Lizard said. Sure there are risks but thats part of the fun of it all. If this bet is making the game not fun for you then I suggest not caring if you lose it or not and just play.
The cat girl went into a terrorized emote. Oh no! I cant lose this bet! You dont understand what Id have to do to pay it off!
What did you
? Lizard trailed off. Never mind, on second thought I dont want to know. Okay, let me ask you a question; is the guy youre betting with there in the room watching you play?
No, he lives a couple cities over actually
Then exactly how is he supposed to know at what level your character first dies?
Well I would tell him of cour
A long silence. Oh. Oh! Thanks Lizard! And she scurried off towards the train depot.
He turned to Dorothy. Now do you have an actual question or would you feel more comfortable if I made you solo the Statesman Task Force first?
Well, I dont have a question so much as a request. I was totally bored under the Atlas statue and I just want to get a team together and have some fun while learning to play the game.
Lizard just stared at her for a long, quiet time. Finally the dialogue appeared in the chat window. You mean like the team you just came here with?
Yes, just like that.
And what have you guys been doing before you came here to talk to me?
Oh, a little street sweeping
we ran a mission or two
made a couple new contacts.
And did you have fun doing that?
Listen, I didnt come here to answer a bunch of stupid questions! Are you going to help me or not?
Youre not too bright, are you? Lizard asked then turned and super leapt away. His words lingering in the chat window even after he was gone.
Dorothy was so shocked she simply stared for a long time, wondering what the heck his problem was. When she finally was able to pay attention to her surroundings again she noticed that her team window was empty except for herself and TaTa. The others had left team chat messages explaining they were going to slot or craft.
Well, TaTa, she typed. It looks like its just you and me now.
Nah, TaTa said. This is boring as all heck. Im gonna switch to one of my fifties and see if Lizard can get me in on that farm. His name vanished from the team window which went dark.
Dorothy stood there for a long moment.
WELL FU..... !!
The screen goes black. The words The End appear and the credits begin to scroll.
My mind wanders so often you've probably seen its picture on milk cartons. - Me... the first person version of the third person Steelclaw
Bravo! Bravo!
My arcs are constantly shifting, just search for GadgetDon for the latest.
The world beware! I've started a blog
GadgetMania Under Attack: The Digg Lockout
You know what's funny, when i 1st got this game i played in black and white for a while before i figured out how to fix the graphics 
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Yark! Yark!
[/ QUOTE ]
I thought I was the only one to characterize little dog barks with this word. Bonus point for you.
The Alt Alphabet ~ OPC: Other People's Characters ~ Terrific Screenshots of Cool ~ Superhero Fiction
Very nice work! Well done.
Brilliant. Bravo!
Freedom: Blazing Larb, Fiery Fulcrum, Sardan Reborn, Arctic-Frenzy, Wasabi Sam, Mr Smashtastic.
That was fantastic. Thanks for sharing!
Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Hyperstrike
English does not borrow from other languages. English follows other languages down dark alleys, hits them over the head, and rifles through their pockets for loose grammar.
|
Truly visionary. A well spun tale if ever there was one.
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Dorothy and the others whipped around to see the Lizard watching them with an aura of bored resignation, or it might have been Invulnerability.
[/ QUOTE ]
I nearly horked Mt Dew all over my cubicle when I read this, trying to stifle the bellow of laughter that would have frightened my co-workers 
.
Bravissimo!
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First of all, never become an RPer
you suck at it. Second, dont ever create a character on Virtue if you want to survive. As far as hitting things though, what kind of enhancements do you have slotted?
Enhancements?
[/ QUOTE ]
5 Starred.
/applaud
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Truly visionary. A well spun tale if ever there was one.
[ QUOTE ]
Dorothy and the others whipped around to see the Lizard watching them with an aura of bored resignation, or it might have been Invulnerability.
[/ QUOTE ]
I nearly horked Mt Dew all over my cubicle when I read this, trying to stifle the bellow of laughter that would have frightened my co-workers .
Bravissimo!
[/ QUOTE ]
The producers of City of Oz shall not be held liable for any gastro-intestinal disorders, reversals, fast forwards, distresses, liquidations, evacuations, total halts, calcifications or hue alterations. The reader shall be held accountable for any damages to computer monitors and/or keyboards so saturated with any such materials. The producers of City of Oz shall not be held responsible for the loss of job, respect, dignity, lunch, lunch money, virginity or functioning brain cells as a result of reading City of Oz.
We here at City of Oz understand you have a choice of parody materials to read. We thank you for your support and hope you enjoyed your stay.
Applicable health warnings and legal notifications on file.
~The Management
My mind wanders so often you've probably seen its picture on milk cartons. - Me... the first person version of the third person Steelclaw
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Great stuff here!
Ex
Steelclaw, I truly enjoyed each post of yours in this thread... you did a wonderful job! 
Satan trembles when he sees...
the weakest saint on his knees.
<----- Click there to learn how you can help!
Awesome. Just freaking awesome.
Bravo! This will be pointed out to my friends.
www.paragonwiki.com is a great source of information for this game.
New or returning to the game? Want advice from experienced players who want to help YOU?
The Mentor Project: Part of the New Player Council.
*tossing roses onto stage*
That is a work of "Ascendant Phone Call" quality! Brilliant.
"How do you know you are on the side of good?" a Paragon citizen asked him. "How can we even know what is 'good'?"
"The Most High has spoken, even with His own blood," Melancton replied. "Surely we know."
As someone who was in the chorus of a production of the Wizard of Oz, those songs scanned great! I heard them all in their full gory...ah, glory.
Rend this space....
Great job Steel.
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Great stuff here!
Ex
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/e faints
My mind wanders so often you've probably seen its picture on milk cartons. - Me... the first person version of the third person Steelclaw
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Great stuff here!
Ex
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/e faints
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Soooo deserved..I mean the saving part, not the fainting.
This is brilliant.
Can't wait to play your MA-created story arcs...You are going to create some, aren't you?
[COLOR=darkorchid]Nebulhym's AE Arcs: Try them now![/COLOR]
# 12647: Of feathers and fur...[COLOR=yellow]Winner of [B]The American Legion[/B]'s January 2011 AE Author Contest![/COLOR]
# 292389: From Tartarus with love...
# 459592: Interdimensional Headache
I think you should talk with one of the movie making buffs around here (like Dark_Respite) about actually recording this in-game. I think it could be done phenomenally well.
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Great stuff here!
Ex
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/e faints
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Soooo deserved..I mean the saving part, not the fainting.
This is brilliant.
Can't wait to play your MA-created story arcs...You are going to create some, aren't you?
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I have been considering it. I wrote a Blue Steel story arch some time ago and posted it somewhere around here. It was meant as a spoof but it was well received by everyone. I may try making that one.
Any MA I make will likely turn out to be comedic in nature. I seem to have this problem being serious for very long.
Thanks to all of you for the good reviews and kind words! I greatly appreaciate it! I am very glad you all enjoyed the story.
And if anyone would like to make a movie using this I am 100% in favor of it. So long as you don't ask me to help with the singing. Heh.
My mind wanders so often you've probably seen its picture on milk cartons. - Me... the first person version of the third person Steelclaw
Okay, for those of the TLDR crowd you may as well just stop here. This is going to be a really... REALLY long post. The upside is that it is NOT a rant, a flame, or anything even remotely resembling something serious.
I have been in a parody song writing mood l lately and got this idea for making a City of Heroes parody for the songs from the Wizard of Oz. After further thought I decided that it would make more sense to do a complete parody of it, with story and everything.
So, for those of you who want a humorous (hopefully) story to read complete with song parodies by your's truly, enjoy!
-------------------------------------
The defender looked around the parking lot with wide brown eyes. The splash screen just before had said this was something called Outbreak but everything looked pretty calm to her. It was her first time ever playing the new game and she had opted to run a defender as her first character because all the others were far too violent sounding. She was a sweet girl; very innocent and without a brain in her head. Her toon was a young looking girl with long brown hair and a blue dress; she had named her Dorothy GaleWind and selected the Storm primary because she thought the Tornado power sounded very cool.
She saw a message box appear on the screen saying that someone wanted her to be a team member. She clicked Yes and turned to see very short canine looking creature beside her. It had the preposterous name of TaTa floating above its head in blue letters. This must be the character of the guy who had gotten her to play in the first place, she thought. Hed told her he was going to run a controller, whatever that was, and he would meet her in the tutorial. Her friend had been playing the game for years and had seven level 50 characters, two of them villains, as well as a 38th level Peacebringer and a 25th level Widow. None of this made a bit of sense to her, but it sounded impressive enough. He had also told her that he was a dedicated roleplayer; when hed said this it had been in serious tones as though in warning.
Well, here we are in a parking lot, she typed in local. What are we supposed to do now?
Yark! Yark! came the reply.
Huh? she added a frowny face emote just for good measure. Youre supposed to be helping me learn how to play this game! Now what do we do now?
The little dog thing ran up to a police officer with a yellow ring around his feet as though he hadnt been able to make it to the bathroom on time. TaTa began to jump up and down excitedly.
Yark! Yark!
Dorothy GaleWind wasnt that bright so it took some time. TaTas yarks eventually evolved into yips, howls, whines and finally a *threatening growl* before they completed the mission and spoke the final time with the figure known as Coyote.
A new splash screen appeared, with images of what looked like a lovely city. The music swelled from her speakers and she felt curiously excited by the sound. When the image resolved she found herself at the foot of some stairs staring up at an immense statue holding aloft a globe.
TaTa, I dont think were in Outbreak anymore, she typed.
She spoke with Miss Liberty. Though it took her a moment or two to realize it was a computer run character as she talked in Local to her for several minutes with no response. By the time shed dropped the power choosing screen TaTa was several yards away standing on a raised platform between the statues legs. For some strange reason he now had the words Top Dog in smaller print under his name.
She joined him and watched the small clusters of other characters; all talking to one another. Their costumes were pretty and gave her some good ideas for other characters to create later on. However, Dorothy didnt have the longest attention span in the world and soon she started getting bored. She began to whine in Local.
(Singing)
Somewhere, out beyond Atlas, past the horde
Theres a place of adventure
Where I will not be bored
Somewhere, out beyond Atlas, is the best
And I wont have to waste my time
With costume contests
Maybe TaTa will pass me star
And show me where the missions are
There for me.
Where bad guys melt before my blast
Of gale force free-form flowing gas
Thats where youll find me.
Somewhere, out beyond Atlas, heroes fly.
Toons fly out beyond Atlas,
Why then- oh, why cant I?
If spandex-wearing heroes fly beyond poor Atlas
Why, oh, why cant I?
(end song)
My mind wanders so often you've probably seen its picture on milk cartons. - Me... the first person version of the third person Steelclaw