FAQ: R U H34lar?

avonlea: excellent suggestions. I'll update with a new draft. New material will be in pink or something.

Are you a Healer? v.2c
a Guide by, The Mighty Storm

note: let me know if there are any mynocks chewing on the power cables.

Chapter 1: Are you a Healer

City of Heroes is a great game with wonderful content and a new action-packed pace for the MMO world. In this world, the only green commodity is health; that most precious substance, the elixir of life.

Within the game experience there are 2 ATs which hold the key to the liquor cabinet where the bottles of this elixir of life reside. These are the Defender, noble and majesticly sillhouetted against the evening sky, and the Controller; a kind of parasite, that has a wretched beauty that can only be appreciated by the flesheating worm or the family of leeches.

A controller's primary purpose is to turn the game into a shooting gallery in which the villains do not fight back. A defender's primary purpose is to turn the game into a holocaustian slaughter house where the mobs do not have an opportunity to fight back before being dismembered wholesale.

There are other ATs but their contributions are largely irrelevant, except in as much as they crave health. They crave health because they serve no other purpose than to absorb punishment that might accidentally hurt a controller or a defender. This punishment is often received during brilliant and unconventional tactical maneuvers such as the 'lol you don't need end' frontal assault, or the 'lolz, look a glowy' feint which results in pulling 3 spawns at once. Of course, there's the ever popular 'musste Herdz!' t-shirt wearing tanker corps.

Because of these strategic masterminds, the best solution to any problem will often be seen as healing. Since, the theory goes, if you can't *die* you can't *lose*. Unless you were somehow a loser beforehand. I'm not saying they are; just in general.

As a result, a defender or controller will often receive personal messages eloquently requesting the pleasure of their company and the boon of their health-restoring capacities.

common forms are:
"r u healer?"
"We need healz"
"Can u healz?"
"empath?"

and the ever popular

"LFH 4 FF"

which is a complicated shorthand to state 'Looking for a Healer to assist us in the Hollows with Frostfire, who is difficult, apparently'.

Please keep in mind that Frostfire is best soloed or duoed.

In all these cases, the answer you should give is 'no'.
However, if you find yourself overwhelmed by the bohemian charm of the request, you will need to read further into the duties of a healer.

Chapter 2: The duties of a healer

The duties of a healer may seem cut and dried, but they are in fact subject to a rigorous hierarchy of needs.

First, determine if you have full endurance. Using a heal with less than full endurance is risky behavior that may leave you without the precious energy to useyour other powers. Be sure that the blue bar is completely full, as it is better safe then sorry.

Then, if your bar is completely full, and you are, therefor, in the best possible position to use a heal, determine if there are any defenders or controllers without full health. It is best to heal these ATs because they are the only ones capable of returning the favor. Essentially, healing any other AT is a bad investment. Concentrate on powersets that have a radial heal; as these will be the most likely to accidentally heal you.

Finally, observe the rest of the combat. Are there other ATs with health falling into the yellow or red? If so, retreat to a safe distance, conserving end to heal yourself, since the combat is doubtlessly going badly. Remember; your life is more valuable because you are in the selfless position of support.

Above all, do not use a heal on someone who is near death, as they will most likely die, and end up being a waste of endurance; the invaluable fuel which makes your powreful support role possible.

As previously mentioned, a controller is a degenerate form of defender, which appears noble in the same way that a poisonous toad appears noble when it elects not to eat its own young, but there is a key difference in playstyle which should be noted.

A controller isn't just another healer out there, working the job, and living in the now. They have responsibility. You see, a controller is healing for two. Your pets need that endurance converted to pure serum of living energy because only *they* will stay with you for your entire career, or the next 2 minutes, whichever comes first. Only *they* will aggro mobs without your permission and exercise seemingly incoherent, nearly random strategy on your behalf. The other ATs will be doing this same thing, but they will be doing it for themselves; more piglets shoving their brethren away from the teet, hoping to stuff more hot milk into their fat little bodies, while the others starve. Your pets, by contrast, will simply be too stupid to know any better, rather than actively in competition with you. In fact, anything they kill will give you xp. This is completely different than the other teammembers, who will take xp from you through the mechanism of 'shares' (see finance).

Never heal another team member if your pet could use healing. This is one of the few cases where overhealing is completely acceptible.

Chapter 3: Slotting to be a healer

The best possible slotting for any healing power is one end-redux SO. This will help alleviate the burden of producing life from cold unliving meat. I've seen healers with 6-slotted end reducers in their healing powers, and while I do not recommend it, it is another viable way to play the role of healer. Under no circumstance slot recharge reducers or heal boosters, as these will simply encourage your team to request more heals, and ultimately burden your endurance even more; making your healing inefficient. With careful management, you can avoid spending more than 5 endurance an hour on healing, even in the most desperate trials and hazard zone teams.

In addition, avoid using more than a single healing option. Many players mistakenly take healing aura *and* heal other, as well as, in some cases, regeneration buffs. These are redundant and will serve only to distract you. It's best to pick one skill, such as you basic heal, and use it sparingly. This is better than having several options for healing, and accidentally using too much or 'overhealing'.

A quick note on Overhealing. Over healing doesn't just necessarily occur when healing someone past their hitpoint cap. In fact this rarely happens. Usually overhealing occurs when the defender or controller heals the teammate more times than is strictly necessary. This can happen because the teammate has a respite, or has rest fully recharged and is fully capable of healing themselves. Some tankers have self-heals which they do not slot fully to keep themselves afloat. If a tanker's self-heal is not fully slotted and properly enhanced, any healing performed on them is overhealing, and an inefficient waste of endurance.

[ QUOTE ]
Empathy and the self-sacrificing absorb pain -

Empaths are in a unique position, in as much as they can heal another without using endurance. They trade some of their own health for a health boost on another. Empaths should keep in mind that they will still have to restore their own health in some way, and that this will often use endurance, but even if it does not, you use up animation time that could be spent on more valid powers. I recommend saving this power for emergencies, such as when a good friend, who is a member of the opposite sex and likes you very much (possibly a spouse) *and* is a defender or controller is in desperate straits (though remember not to waste the heal if they are close to death, as they will most likely die anyway).


[/ QUOTE ]

Chapter 4: Describing your role to teammembers

Don't bother, anyone who read the description of a blaster and actually rolled one up isn't capable of understanding your role, let alone how to breath without visual aids and an iron lung.

Chapter 4b: Communication

The hallmark of good communication is clarity, precision, and brevity; a good healer can have none of these things. When you wish to apply a preemptive healing skill, such as a regenerative buff, instruct a subject carefully, with innuendo, and at great length about where they should stand, and what the disposition of other teammembers should be whilst you are applying the buff, so that you are not ambushed, thereby requiring you to retreat a safe distance of one mile (past tether range on a sniper), or, conversely, time is not wasted after the application of the buff putting the now blessed hero to work, utilizing the buff in your service. In general, it is best to apply buffs the instant before someone pulls, and only to one hero in the group at a time, so that, in the confusion, no buffs drop, and thereby send the carefully calculated risk and reward matrix into a tailspin.

Courtesy of Avonlea; Do not request that players should 'gather' for buffs such as adrenaline boost or one of those touchy-feely empath things. This merely makes you a more inviting target to villains with aoe powers, and can result in a team wipe, or the necessity of undue endurance expenditure for purposes of self-preservation. Instead, it is best to put any such buffs on autocast, or, at least, use them as soon as they are ready, to insure that you, yourself, are buffed. It's almost certain that some other hero will stumble into the area of effect and receive your boon; do not be alarmed, as this costs you nothing that you were not already willing to spend on yourself.

Chapter 5: Most effective supporting power choices

The most effective healers don't simply concentrate on healing (occasionally), they take other powers which help them provide the most effective total benefit to the team they join. This obviously include hasten and stamina. Dont' question this.

But what else? Well, every healer should take Vengeance. It's key for 3 reasons; if the group needs a healer, and recruits you, there will inevitably be dead bodies stacked like cordwood, and I'm not talking about the villains... Vengeance is a power which requires a dead body to function and results ina great payoff to the defenders and controllers in the team who can really use the extra buffing.

Additionally, if you have a combat rez, such as howling yipping dark craziness, or whatever it's called, or mutation, you shoudl certainly take it. after all, it will avoid any overhealing, since the target will already be dead, and incapable of using respites or self heals (note: firetanks and regen scrappers have a self-rez, so you should never rez them), and it will buff them, protecting your investment of endurance. Keep in mind the dark line rez is an aoe rez which requires a target, so you should slot it for endurance reduction, and never use it unless several people die close together, since otherwise it could be a waste.

Also to consider is the medicine power pool. This is, perhaps, the most indispensible pool available to a healer, as it contains the holy grail of useful-anytime healing powers; heal self. Yes that's right. No other power guarantees that you will not waste your energies on the unworthy. No other power guarantees that you *always* heal the *most* deserving target in the team. Take this early and slot it fully, half with interrupt reductions, and half with recharge reductions. This will allow you to heal yourself as often as you take damage.

But at what threshold should you consider it imperative to heal yourself?

Consider the expectations of one of those couples with a bumper sticker which reads 'proud parent of an honor student'. 90% is an 'A'... but is it enough? No, of course not. When measured on the honor student scale, a 90 percent is a C; average. An 80 percent is an F; total failure. A 95% is a B. To truly convince your FBI director father, and district school supervisor mother that you are trying hard, you must get a 98% or better. This should be your threshold for healing. When you see your life dip below the 97% full line, into 'but you're not an average student, are you, honey' territory it's time to say 'no mom...' sheepishly and hit the books, by which I mean the self-heal. This is the only case in which you do not want to adhere to the end-saving regimen of your other powers, because when it comes to our baby, damn the expense.

Finally other powers, such as fallout, fallout, or fallout leverage a dead teammate as a weapon, and can be far more effective than allowing that teammate to live. In fact, most teammembers will see that they are worth more dead than alive, and request that you stop healing them; alleviating your burden and increasing the team's defender and controller survivability overall.

Also, make sure your team turns off 'prompt to team teleport' as this will allow you to move the bomb at will.

Additionally it has been suggested that phaseshift is a useful power, since, while under its influence, you can easily argue that the crisis of human suffering taking place within your team is not even happening in the same dimension, and therefore is outside your jurisdiction. It would actually be ideal if you could first use blackhole or some similar power to phase shift all the enemies, and then phase shift yourself, so that, not only can your team not require your life-giving power, but also they cannot truly argue they need it, as all the villains are currently in a dimension where everyone looks the same; except with a mustache. In the long run, it is easier to remove villains from the field of battle than to heal, so techniques such as using wormhole, repel, gale, hurricane, and so forth to shuffle enemies towards clusters of police drones are worth considering.

Chapter 6 I think: Conclusion

The role of a healer can be highly rewarding. There's no question that a healer is the lynch pin of a team, provided that team is completely comprised of defenders or controllers. They can turn the tide of battle assuming they feel like it, and overcome impossible odds by using their debuffs or holds instead of wasting time and effort keeping some suicidal PLed Warshade from dying.

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I'd like to thank Gammaraystorm, ZealotOnAStick, Quason, Rasalgethi, and the Communist Penguin for their assistence with this guide. Honestly, I didn't even come up with this material, it's just a collection of their ideas and work. So if anything rubs you the wrong way here, you can ask them to clarify.

I'd also like to thank Avonlea who actually *did* help. Unlike the people who I claimed helped above. The people above actually helped in the same way a Kheldian 'helps'

"OMG! Galaxy! Plz save me!! *runsaway*"

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I have been playing my empath *all wrong*! Thank the heavens that this FAQ is out now. I had no idea what a clueless twit I was being.

My eternal gratitude to the Mighty Storm. I am saved!

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This should be in the manual.

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THIS GUIDE CHANGED MY LIFE

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Very funny guide I just hope that someone actually follows this guide, just to be very evil. As long as they share their story.

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Doom.

Yep.

This is really doom.

v good guide, would read again, A++++

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Very informative guide! I've never played a healer before. And here I always thought the healers with this playstyle were somewhat below par...Now I see the light. Look out teammates, here I come!
*Rushes off to roll H34lar*

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*snickers* Now I'm tempted to make my empath leech (Ill/emp controller) do this....

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One of the best reads I've seen on the boards yet.

Funny how so many players have absorbed your ideas before this was even posted....

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Your funny!!! Keep writin

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it alarms me that this thread had 5 stars and then went down to 3... are people taking it seriously?

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[ QUOTE ]
it alarms me that this thread had 5 stars and then went down to 3... are people taking it seriously?

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah, probably.

It's the same folks who send Miasma Chick tells saying, "r u heelr"

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I don't know, I found this guide's humor to be a bit long winded and roundabout.

It's funny in concept, but in execution, I found myself taking too long mentally to reach the ironic/ludicrous parts to be tickled enough to laugh.

Brevity is the soul of wit?

Plus the narrative tone was a bit mild and "informative" sounding, which kind of made the outrageous statements not as fun. Especially since the statements being made weren't being said in as ludicrous a fashion as they could've been.

This humorous guide does have a lot of ironic statements, but they're delivered so slowly and straightforwardly that they don't surprise you. You can see them coming, and when they arrive they're not so exceptionally ludicrous or well delivered that they're worth the wait.

Not to say that this "guide" wasn't an interesting read, just that it honestly didn't make me laugh. It's a nice idea for ironic posting, but could use some work if you want it to be uproariously funny for a wider audience. Also, I think that some people might have 1-starred your guide because the tone seems very critical of non-defenders, and some people might have taken those parts too seriously. Possibly because you didn't make fun of those non-defenders to an outrageous enough extent to where it was obvious that you were making fun of them in a light-hearted way. The too-serious tone of the writing (which I believe is supposed to add to the irony/comedic effect, but doesn't imho) also doesn't help, because some actually bitter people (which I'm definitely sure you're not one of) do snipe at other classes in a very similar style of writing.

Anyhow, the idea by itself is classic.

Party Leader: r U h33l0r?

Lord Stormhawk(me): No.. I'm Storm/, I'm a buffer/deb-

<kick>

Lord Stormhawk: $#@$$!!!!
----------------------------------
Anyhow, don't take this criticism the wrong way. I'm just trying to help you improve this guide. Comedians, like all writers, operate under the "Rule of 9's" I think, unless they're exceptionally talented. Basically this unofficial "Rule" says 9 out of 10 ideas a writer (usually a comedian) will think of for a joke are going to be bad. Any writer/comedian, even the good ones. And the way that you think up a lot of good jokes/gags is by thinking up say.. 100, and keeping 10, or thinking up rough material and revising and editing it until it's polished to a high sheen.

Okay, it's not -always- 9 out of 10 that are bad, but the point is: more often than not, the average writer is likely to think up something less funny than more funny. So only continual effort without giving up/getting discouraged is the only real way (or secret) to writing funny material consistently.

Hope this helps.

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Arc Salvo: Okay hold one sec guys, we can't just rush in blindly vs these Nemesis, they've got these ranged aoe's tha-
Teammate1(charging in): Shut up, Arc Salvo, you lame*$% Viewtiful Joe wannabe! What do you know?!
Teammate2(also charging): yeah, ST#& arc salvo u PWR RANGR U!
Arc Salvo: *sigh*

Thank you for this guide. I now understand the role of the healers in teams much better.

I am soooooo glad I tend toward scrankers and regen scrappers.

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total kick to the gut

This is like having Ra's Al Ghul show up at your birthday party.

[ QUOTE ]
*snickers* Now I'm tempted to make my empath leech (Ill/emp controller) do this....

[/ QUOTE ]
Hahahahahaha! You're funny..!

*looks down at sig*

...



Hahahahahaha! You're funny..!
-LP

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[ QUOTE ]
Don't bother, anyone who read the description of a blaster and actually rolled one up isn't capable of understanding your role,

[/ QUOTE ]

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You know what's worse than a stuffed-shirt humor critic?

um, nothing.

Christ on a bike, I can't believe you wrote that much trivial uselessness.

Cheers

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[ QUOTE ]
I don't know, I found this guide's humor to be a bit long winded and roundabout.

It's funny in concept, but in execution, I found myself taking too long mentally to reach the ironic/ludicrous parts to be tickled enough to laugh.

Brevity is the soul of wit?

Plus the narrative tone was a bit mild and "informative" sounding, which kind of made the outrageous statements not as fun. Especially since the statements being made weren't being said in as ludicrous a fashion as they could've been.

This humorous guide does have a lot of ironic statements, but they're delivered so slowly and straightforwardly that they don't surprise you. You can see them coming, and when they arrive they're not so exceptionally ludicrous or well delivered that they're worth the wait.

Not to say that this "guide" wasn't an interesting read, just that it honestly didn't make me laugh. It's a nice idea for ironic posting, but could use some work if you want it to be uproariously funny for a wider audience. Also, I think that some people might have 1-starred your guide because the tone seems very critical of non-defenders, and some people might have taken those parts too seriously. Possibly because you didn't make fun of those non-defenders to an outrageous enough extent to where it was obvious that you were making fun of them in a light-hearted way. The too-serious tone of the writing (which I believe is supposed to add to the irony/comedic effect, but doesn't imho) also doesn't help, because some actually bitter people (which I'm definitely sure you're not one of) do snipe at other classes in a very similar style of writing.

Anyhow, the idea by itself is classic.

Party Leader: r U h33l0r?

Lord Stormhawk(me): No.. I'm Storm/, I'm a buffer/deb-

<kick>

Lord Stormhawk: $#@$$!!!!
----------------------------------
Anyhow, don't take this criticism the wrong way. I'm just trying to help you improve this guide. Comedians, like all writers, operate under the "Rule of 9's" I think, unless they're exceptionally talented. Basically this unofficial "Rule" says 9 out of 10 ideas a writer (usually a comedian) will think of for a joke are going to be bad. Any writer/comedian, even the good ones. And the way that you think up a lot of good jokes/gags is by thinking up say.. 100, and keeping 10, or thinking up rough material and revising and editing it until it's polished to a high sheen.

Okay, it's not -always- 9 out of 10 that are bad, but the point is: more often than not, the average writer is likely to think up something less funny than more funny. So only continual effort without giving up/getting discouraged is the only real way (or secret) to writing funny material consistently.

Hope this helps.

[/ QUOTE ]

I appreciate your time and effort, but I think you're rejecting some great comedy work from the likes of Andy Koffman (who I can't stand) and Monty Python (Who I think are great). Running a fine line between seriousness and overt humor let the audience play with the absurd nature of reality itself.

and anyway, I don't think of myself as a comedian. I was just trying to be wry. *really* wry. Picture me wringing out a washcloth.

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[ QUOTE ]


Party Leader: r U h33l0r?

Lord Stormhawk(me): No.. I'm Storm/, I'm a buffer/deb-

<kick>

Lord Stormhawk: $#@$$!!!!



[/ QUOTE ]

If someone asks R U H34L3R? you never say "no"... you simply tell them what you are.

Ex: "I'm a defender."

(Or, if you're an empath, say "I'm an empath." Don't call yourself a healer or let them call you a healer, you'll give the word power.)

Often, they will just leave you at that, especially if you actually can heal. Use O2 boost once or twice to save yourself from a kick and then do your thing. After all, if you do a good job they won't need heals.

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Well, I thought it was funny. Made me laugh at work. Nice job. Stars for you.

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Do I contradict myself?
Very well then I contradict myself,
(I am large, I contain multitudes.) - Whitman

Consistency is the defense of a small mind. - Beldin

[ QUOTE ]
I appreciate your time and effort, but I think you're rejecting some great comedy work from the likes of Andy Koffman (who I can't stand) and Monty Python (Who I think are great). Running a fine line between seriousness and overt humor let the audience play with the absurd nature of reality itself.

and anyway, I don't think of myself as a comedian. I was just trying to be wry. *really* wry. Picture me wringing out a washcloth.


[/ QUOTE ]

I see. Well, I guess that style of humor works better if performed live, where you can add the nuances of vocal inflection, facial expressions, body language, etc. to the mix. I think, at least.

If you were trying to be wry and not funny, you've succeeded. Anyhow, I don't know much about Andy Kauffman, but Monty Python's movies at least are very funny to me.

Well, if your guide is working as intended, cool. Can't say much more than that. It is very wry, and the concepts are very funny.

[ QUOTE ]
You know what's worse than a stuffed-shirt humor critic?

um, nothing.

Christ on a bike, I can't believe you wrote that much trivial uselessness.

Cheers


[/ QUOTE ]

Geez, Zapata, I was just trying to give a fellow amateur comedian (or so it seemed at the time) some tips and constructive criticism. If it seemed stuffed shirt to you, I'm sorry, but I really was just trying to help. I don't consider myself a humor critic, I'm only an amateur at trying to make people laugh myself. But note that I am at heart just a guy that thinks people are too serious, and tries to make them laugh, and so tries to help out fellow people who are just trying to make people laugh occaisonally.

If you're going to take offense at my well-intentioned analysis, fine, but at least read the post on the thread in my sig and the followup on the last page of that thread and read some of my less serious posts across the forums before you jump to the conclusion that I'm an over-serious humor-critic.

I only talk about the rule of 9's because I've noticed that it applies to me especially. 9 times out of 10, my attempts at humor suck, and I'll be the first to admit it. But the 10th time, when it works, I make people laugh, and that makes me feel good, and it makes the other failures worthwhile.

Anyhow, I was trying to encourage Mighty Storm, not discourage him, just so you know, because I've met many an amatuer writer/comedian that are way too hard on themselves because they expect themselves to be really good all the time. And when I shared how even professional stand-up comedians and writers admitted that the rule of 9's applied to them too, that encouraged them, so I figured I'd share it here.

[ QUOTE ]
If someone asks R U H34L3R? you never say "no"... you simply tell them what you are.

Ex: "I'm a defender."

(Or, if you're an empath, say "I'm an empath." Don't call yourself a healer or let them call you a healer, you'll give the word power.)

Often, they will just leave you at that, especially if you actually can heal. Use O2 boost once or twice to save yourself from a kick and then do your thing. After all, if you do a good job they won't need heals.


[/ QUOTE ]

Good advice, but believe it or not, only the most obnoxious teams (that I've found I don't want to join anyway) kick me for not being a he33l0r. Most teams accept that I'm a buffer/debuffer and surprisingly enough, DO stay in Steamy Mist and wait for Freezing Rain, try not to kill the snowstorm anchor, etc. etc. al.

It was shocking to me how many pickup teams were cool with adapting to playing with a Storm defender... and it was more shocking to me how that didn't help in many missions due to the fact that soo many people had their slider set to invincible for 8 man missions. Ugh, let me say for the record that I hate purple Vahz. zOMG, I hate them with a passion!

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Arc Salvo: Okay hold one sec guys, we can't just rush in blindly vs these Nemesis, they've got these ranged aoe's tha-
Teammate1(charging in): Shut up, Arc Salvo, you lame*$% Viewtiful Joe wannabe! What do you know?!
Teammate2(also charging): yeah, ST#& arc salvo u PWR RANGR U!
Arc Salvo: *sigh*

I've recently converted from the unwashed masses to a Kin defender. Do you have any specific advice of what powers I should take or avoid from that set?

heehee, fun guide btw

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Heh, I have a level 12 kin but I was shamed into making yet another Mighty Storm def. As far as I got, I was having fun with siphon speed and transference, or whatever that damage debuff/buff power is at low level. I was planning on getting null density (or whatever its called) and slotting it up for recharge so I'd never be without the mad hops.

on another note, while I was in grad school, I learned that the best thing I could do for my own sanity was tell myself jokes in my head, and laugh out loud at them. When I write on non-academic subjects (such as OMG HeRDz!), I tend to just put out what seems funniest in my head. I hope someone else finds it funny. If they don't, no great sweat. I enjoyed it so I wanted to pass it on, hopefully it doesn't hurt anyone when its out there. I put this up in the defender forum to see if anyone thought it was funny (besides me) and I got a decent enough response to update the doc with everything you see in pink, so I figured it was worth keeping around.

If it's not your speed, I can appreciate that.

You said it was funny in concept, just not something that made you laugh, and I think that's fine. I get a warm fuzzy feeling from stuff like (say) Calvin and Hobbes or Peanuts which isn't laugh-out-loud hilarious on every page, but generally pleasant.

Plus I'm a word-fetishist, and that makes most of this stuff funnier to me than it would be to normal well-adjusted individuals.

You bring up good points. There's a million things in the world you shouldn't take seriously, some of them are championed by those who may even believe you *should*, but you can't; and that's a process exterior to this trivial little playtime I put together here; like many people, I learned as I grew up that people would occasionally say things that seemed purpose-composed to irritate me, and in so learning I realized that there's absolutely no reason to be irritated on those grounds alone.

Here's a great example. I was shooting trap with a friend of mine and my father, and I was doing poorly (We were firing from the down position, and I was trying out a new gun, getting frustrated, and then being annoyed at my own frustration), and I loaded and took off the safety, ready for my bird, when my friend made a comment along the lines of 'Remember, it's the little orange thing you're aiming for'. I turned towards him, literally weighing in my mind how much trouble I would be in if I shot him, and then realized I was being stupid; I missed again, and started laughing.

Point is, you come to a roadblock in your head where something is unacceptible, you can either sit there and fume or turn all the way around and go the other way. It's not easy sometimes, but I find my quality of life is higher if I *assume* everyone is joking.

For instance, I find this tactic works wonders when Statesman posts...

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A good philosphy to have, Mighty Storm. Best not to get worked up over stuff that you can't do much good about, imho too. Anyhow, having realized that I'd stopped reading at Chapter 4 with two more to go, I decided to finish up your guide, and found Chapters 5 and 6 to be more directly ironic and therefore funny to me. Key word being -me- of course. Everyone has a different sense of humor, and knowing this: I, like you, write what's funny to me and hope at least one other person will find what I write funny as well. From your responses, I'd say that you've succeeded in this goal.

Anyhow, I found this tidbit in your credits funniest of all:

[ QUOTE ]
I'd also like to thank Avonlea who actually *did* help. Unlike the people who I claimed helped above. The people above actually helped in the same way a Kheldian 'helps'

"OMG! Galaxy! Plz save me!! *runsaway*"


[/ QUOTE ]

The most accurate portrayal of Kheldian "helping" I've seen.
'nuff said.

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Arc Salvo: Okay hold one sec guys, we can't just rush in blindly vs these Nemesis, they've got these ranged aoe's tha-
Teammate1(charging in): Shut up, Arc Salvo, you lame*$% Viewtiful Joe wannabe! What do you know?!
Teammate2(also charging): yeah, ST#& arc salvo u PWR RANGR U!
Arc Salvo: *sigh*

ROTFL !!!!!!!!!!

5 STARS

This man needs a spot on the COV Beta

Great Guide, please feel free to share more of your wisdom with us

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Centinull