The you kill me, I kill you...(and so on) thread!
Immortal avenges the kittens. Then he kills The Mad Welshmen. Twice. And once more.
Once upon a midnight dreary, while I rested, weak and weary,
After trouncing scoundrels and letting go a great Herculean roar,
Came Immortal with a kitten, of which he was clearly smitten,
To kill me thrice with his big mitten, dripping with odious gore,
So Mad Welshman kills Immortal just to even out the score,
Only this, and nothing more.
Meff guts that guy forever more.
Immortal hits his head on a great oak door
And falls down to the floor
He wakes up hours later, weak and soar
And jumps to his feet with a mighty roar
But then Edger Allen Poe's ghost kills him.
Shockwave walks in the thread smiling...
"Hi guys what's going on!?"
...then trips and kills himself after falling into a put of rabid chinchilla's
Flaming spirit comes running into the thread with a giant boombox on his shoulders and throws it down ontop of a stray kangaroo.
upon doing this he just smiles and comences to jam to the beats
The Kill Thread Sentry Gun (tm) strikes down upon Flaming spirit with hot lead vengeance for not obviously killing anything in his post.
Immortal /dances everyone to insanity. They all die of old age.
Flaming spirit spawns a block away and comes running back. Upon seeing the dancing immortal he rips the leg off of the kangaroo he killed with his boombox and beats immortal to death with it. Upon doing so he throws the leg at the sentry gun and is killed when the gun activates its defences.
Immortal back-hands Flaming spirit to death. The masses rejoice, and there is much feasting.
Flaming spirit gives immortal a bad papercut, which becomes infected and killes immortal when the infection reaches his brain
Calash starts killing everybody softly with his song.
Calash dies due to a newly discovered strand of the bubonic plague that somehow found its way into his morning coffee.
Raging Cow, angered by all the death Immortal has caused, charges into the fray with a stampede from The Cow Conspiracy, who are throwing milk bombs left and right, and they trample over Immortal, and then quietly leave and go back to Cow Headquarters.
Shadowmantle arrives with PIE! and happily doles out large generous slices of the rich delicious dessert to everyone present.
The rich taste of bitter almonds fills their senses. Overwhelming delight is the order of the day. Shadowmantle is very good cook; he learned to be a chef from his Italian Grandmother.
Confused looks cross the faces of all who ate PIE. Then, one by one, they drop like flies on a hot august afternoon.
Everyone dies happy knowing that this was the best almond roca cocoa cyanide pie they have ever gasped their last tasting.
Shadowmantle dances a little happy-dance celebrating his Borgia heritage.
At which point a large stone mallet comes flying out of nowhere, knocking Shadowmantle's head clean off. As the massive weapon boomerangs back into the shadows, Destroya steps forth, looks around, spots the dead people and gets on the radio.
Within moments the Zombie Clowns have arrived, despite the attempts of the Vengeful Killer Mimes from Saturn to stop the incessant noze-squeezing (the honking... the HONKING!!!). Incidentally, this resulted in the mimes being reduced to a fine paste that now orbits the Earth like a ring of... red paste.
The Zombie Clowns proceed to ressurect all the dead people, and then eat their heads off, killing them again.
Destroya looks around, shrugs, and unzips her skin, and Freakazette steps out.
"Groovy!"
Shadowmantle re-appears at the hospital, runs 1.12mi back to the thread and proceeds to say to Freakazette:
"WHAT! You don't like PIE?!!? THat was grandmother's BEST RECIPE!"
Shadowmantle then, in best scrapperlike fashion, launches into the Zombie Clowns with repeated shadowmauls, siphon lifes and dark consumptions, killing them ....again... i ... guess.......
He then turns to Freakazette and says:
"FINE! You get no PIE!, just the SLICES!" and promptly cuts her head clean off and holds it up for all and sundry to see... except all and sundry have no eyes since they have no heads because the Zombie Clowns ate them.
Shadowmantle passes awakens to all and sundry that have not yet made their way to the hospital(Hey, for just 250@, I want people to see my victory.).
Experiment 2.0 gets out a knife and fork and continues to eat everyone. They all burn up in his stomach acid, dying. He then throws up evetyone and eats them again.
With an itchy reflex finger, Shadowmantle reappears at the hospital again (Sorry he gave out all of his awakens.).
Ugh... another 1.12 miles to the thread.
Ignoring all opportunity kills on the way, he returns just in time to see Experiment 2.0 finishing his macabre (and rather disgusting) meal.
Shadowmantle thinks to himself, "This canNOT go on! I have to terminate this experiment." He then proceeds to use his arcane knowledge of accupuncture to neutralize the chi-flow in Experiment 2.0, sticking him with pins from head to toe. (Actually, I just like thought of sticking people with pins, but if I can turn a hobby into an avocation, all the better, right?)
As Experiment 2.0 feels its lifeforce ebbing, dwindling, failing, suddenly everything goes dark.
Shadowmantle quickly dissolves the remains in a 55gallon drum of Aqua Regia, and encases the whole thing in a large block of concrete.
Satisfied, he helps himself to a well deserved piece of PIE.... er... ooops... darn!
XXX
Raging Cow, disguised as a regular civilian, walks into the building. He has been watching the whole time. "This whole thing is horrible. Why are they using poisoned pie and pins and needles to kill eachother repetitively? This is brutal! I cant let this go on." Just then, Experiment 2.0 walks into the room. "Hello there, Experiment." "Hi there. Have you seen a guy named Shadowmantle lately?" "No, but I know you'll find him in the hospital. He ate some poisoned pie. I'll give you a RIDE OVER THERE!" With incredible agility, he flashes out of his civilian costume. Then the mad cow lets out a deafening moo and brandishes his flame sword, then pounds his chest. He gets into a ferocious position. Then he has a heroic battle to the finish with Experiment 2.0 and finally defeats him. Then Shadowmantle walks in. "How dare you kill my current arch-nemesis! DIE!!!!" Shadowmantle throws a flurry of punches (Shadow Maul) at the crazed cowman, and the Raging Cow flees into the distance, howling...
Experiment comes out of the hospital, and starts walking, then... "Screw this!" He takes off and lands on something mushy... he looks down to see Mad Cow, he had squished him! WOOHOO! then shadow mantle comes, after chasing the cow dude, then experiment puts out his hand, and does that morpheous gestuer (Spelt wrong)
Calash walks down the street to a small office on a unremarkable corner.
In the office is a white room with one door and no windows.
In the center of the room is a very unremarkable pedestal crowned with a while box. In the center of the box sits a solitary red button, beckoning Calash to press it.
Breaking down he runs over to the button and presses it.
Somewhere a person kills a mosquito.
Oh...and the button was the history eraser button, but the last patch broke it.
Shadowmantle, recognizing the threat of Calash's foiled action for what it is (An attempt to erase the inconvenient history of his failed dattempts to sieze power and rule the world!), unleashes the full fury of the Shadowrealm upon Calash, draining him of all color, joy, or capacity for warmth.
In despair, Calash reviews the series of utter failures that led to this dreadful moment in time when there is no hope to be seen and slips into a catatonic trance. Shadowmantle then thoroughly wraps Calash's head in plastic wrap and watches him smother until he stops twitching.
Eying the remains of the PIE warily, Shadowmantle whistles a happy tune.
The daft cow respawns in the hospital. "How did my cow senses not detect that silly old Experiment 2.0 about to land on my head?! Hello? I DIED because of that. Heck I don't know how I'm alive if I DIED. Its not at all logical! But who said a walking super cow is logical? And does anyone really care if either one is logical? Not me. Nope." Raging Cow walks out of the hospital and takes an unpleasant 1.12 mi. jog to the thread. He enters the thread and sees Shadowmantle eating his slice of doom pie. "I'll be waiting for you, Shadow."
Just then, someone goes flying through the air and slams into the cow. "Are you alright?" "I think so. I was just smacked by that Immortal113 guy." "I haven't seen him in the thread for a while. Guess he came back. Need some help?" "Sure! I'm Tech Kwon Do, Scrapper Extraodinare!" The two charge to see Immortal finishing bashing somebody. "Immortal, your reign of terror ends now, at least for now!" Tech sends a flying sidekick into Immortal and Raging Cow breathes fire on him. Immortal picks up Tech Kwon Do, pummels him and hurls him through a window. Raging Cow throws some puny flares and the immortal Immortal bashes him. Tech Kwon Do leaps back through the window and throws a thunder kick followed by two cranes and a storm kick flurry, followed by Raging Cows glorious fire blade, finished up by a mere fire blast, knocking the mighty Immortal113 to the ground, finishing him off. Atleast until he posts again =)
After getting up from the battle, experiment says "Thanks... you know, I will let you in on a secret.... YAH!!!!!!" and Experiment fires 2 poison spines into his 2 saviours, then gets to the Thread Gun (tm), rewires it, and blasts everyone but himself! I RULE!
In retaliation The Mad Welshman kills Calash with a kitten.
![Frown](images/smilies/frown.gif)
The poor, poor kittens!
Let the kittens be avenged!