Dreading the new Dark Shadows movie
By
Aneko,
Posted on: 2012-03-28 19:11 in Comic and Hero-Villain Culture
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My group of friends have a variation on this but it's very much like the above suggestion (Pitchmen online).|
Originally Posted by Arnabas
My friends and I made a game out of this, trying to see if we could remake shows we used to watch.
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you have two tables of 12 words, roll a D12 twice and that will be your movie. Roll a D6 to consult the 'tagline' table, roll another D6 to get the 'critic snapshot on the box'.
From there you need to describe to the other players what the film is about, give a general plot summary and then the other players give their 'critical opinion' in a rating of 1-5 stars.
The best we came up with was a movie called Fast Arnold about a man (the titular Arnold) who was trying to become the first man run at the speed of sound, all the while his nemesis Speedy Steve plotted to sabotage his attempt so he could become the first.
His first test run ends in disaster as, while approaching the speed of sound, he trips on a rock and breaks almost every bone in his body. The Doctors tell him he'll never run again but he proves them wrong and eventually beats his rival in a one on one race to break the Sound barrier.
The Tagline was "The unbelieveable finally achieved!" and the critic on the box snippet was "better than a box full of spiders."
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Quote:
But they couldn't kill Gilligan because all of them were already dead. Gilligan was Satan keeping them from moving on to the Afterlife. Every effort to get off the island was somehow able to be sabotaged by one buffoon. It takes a special kind of maliciousness to do that...|
Originally Posted by Nericus
Just think, if they killed Gilligan they could have left the island...
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*tinfoil hat*
Yeah , I was intrested in Dark Shadows till I saw that clip. Guess to be hip youi have to make fun of something.
Wasn't there supposed to be coming out (or I may have missed it) some brooding Dark-Shadows-esque country manor film? Can't remember enough details to track it down.
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Oh you will just LOVE the new Lone Ranger movie|
Originally Posted by Vox Populi
Tim Burton Presents: Johnny Depp in White Make-Up, Part 7 (or whatever they're at). Co-starring Helena Bonham Carter. Music by Danny Elfman.
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Originally Posted by Nericus
Just think, if they killed Gilligan they could have left the island...
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That said, I´ve never heard of this soap opera before today. And hey, Burton & Depp... I´ll watch and probably like the movie no matter what the original was. maybe watch it afterwards
@Redcap
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It became Inspector Gadget.
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Originally Posted by Arnabas
I'm just glad that they never made the rumoured remake of The Six Million Dollar man starring Jim Carrey, which was, again, going to be a comedy. I figured that they would probably play with the fact that 6 million is a comparatively small amount of money today and have the "comedy" focus around Steve's bionics being bargain-basement stuff that frequently malfunctions, leading to all sorts of hilarity...
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While not an MMO, I believe they had a game with a similar idea a while back. Don't recall the name, though.
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Originally Posted by Olantern
I came expecting to read a little about some average-to-poor movie, a lot of complaining about Hollywood, and a little countercomplaining about complaining.
I left with the most enjoyable new party game of the year. Seriously, they should package this idea and sell it as an MMO. You could call it "Pitchmen Online." |
I think it looks funny. The source material was high-concept dreck. It should be right in Burton/Depp/Elfman's comfort zone, which is where I want them. I think it will be a safe 70%-er on the Tomatometer. Also, I loves me some disco. I am MUCH more worried about the Lone Ranger remake.
My girlfriend and I got a laugh out of it and neither of us have heard of the source material - so if nothing else the trailer has brought awareness that it IS based on something to two more people.
I'll probably watch it before thinking about checking out said source material so I don't have to worry about being outraged at the adaptation.
I'd be seriously surprised if the Lone Ranger remake was anything but Zapp Brannigan and Kiff from Futurama in the wild west.
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As a soap opera from almost 50 years ago, the series may not be the best way to experience the original today (Barnabas isn't even in the first year or so). Fortunately there are two official movies, House of Dark Shadows and Night of Dark Shadows.
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Originally Posted by TheBruteSquad
I'll probably watch it before thinking about checking out said source material so I don't have to worry about being outraged at the adaptation.
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'I don't like the look of it at all,' said the King: 'however, it may kiss my hand if it likes.'
'I'd rather not,' the Cat remarked.
'Don't be impertinent,' said the King, 'and don't look at me like that!' He got behind Alice as he spoke.
'A cat may look at a king,' said Alice.
I think it looks pretty funny - although I've never heard of the thing it was based on - and Depp+witches+vampies = hawt
@Golden Girl
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well, at least Barnabas doesn't sparkle
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Global @Desi Nova Twitter: @desi_nova Steam: Desi_nova. I don't do Xbox or PS3
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We haven't seen the whole flick yet...|
Originally Posted by Desi_Nova
well, at least Barnabas doesn't sparkle
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*SHUDDER*
Clicking on the linked image above will take you off the City of Heroes site. However, the guides will be linked back here.
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Basically it was a soap from the mid-60's that ran into the early 70's. About 6 months in, they changed from basically just a gothic theme to a goth/horror, first introducing ghosts, then Jonathan Frid as the the vampire Barnabas Collins.|
Originally Posted by Golden Girl
I think it looks pretty funny - although I've never heard of the thing it was based on - and Depp+witches+vampies = hawt
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What made it somewhat...unique was the fact that they pretty much did live-to-tape (essentially limiting the number of retakes) for EVERYTHING. So you can see actors heming and hawing their lines, bumping into props, stagehands and boom mics wandering into frame, etc..
What's more, unlike other productions of the time (which were destroyed to recycle film stock) all but one of DS episodes have survived.
There was a semi-decent revival of the program in prime time back in the early 90's. It got killed due to coverage from the first Gulf War pre-empting it so much.
Basically this is the series that paved the way for many of the later supernatural/horror/etc serials (including Buffy).
And yes, it was campy. ESPECIALLY due to the errors mentioned above.
I'm not really upset with the treatment it was given. Just irritated that yet another rehash of an old property has been given the "Screw 11! Let's turn the camp up to NINE THOUSAAAAAAAND!" treatment.
Clicking on the linked image above will take you off the City of Heroes site. However, the guides will be linked back here.
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If Lone Ranger gets anything like this, I will love it|
Originally Posted by TheBruteSquad
I'd be seriously surprised if the Lone Ranger remake was anything but Zapp Brannigan and Kiff from Futurama in the wild west.
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@Redcap
ANARCHY = A Society that does not need government
114. Ahrouns do not appreciate my particular brand of humour, so I should stop bleaching bulls-eyes in their fur.
Dear Mr. Depp, please put the pirate attire back on and resume making Disney Pirates movies.. or at least leave the Captain Sparrow character on the Pirates sets.
Watching that trailer, I can see some of Jacks mannerisms showing through that awful white makeup that Depp is apparently so fond of wearing.
That said, as much as I want to hate this abomination, Johnny Depp+Tim Burton movies are one of my guilty pleasures.
Story arcs:
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Mis-use of the word campy? That's a day in the box.|
Originally Posted by Hyperstrike
So you can see actors heming and hawing their lines, bumping into props, stagehands and boom mics wandering into frame, etc..
... And yes, it was campy. ESPECIALLY due to the errors mentioned above. |
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Camp_(style)
"Camp" is an intentional effect, so the new Depp film is the "campy" DS, but the original DS series is not (unless you think anything with vampires in it that doesn't wink is already over the top).
(I normally don't like to play etymology-cop, but I only recently learned this about "camp" myself and since then I see it everywhere...)
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Just to clarify my position, and possibly that of some others: there may be nothing inherently wrong with this movie, but it should absolutely not pretend to be related to Dark Shadows.
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Originally Posted by Mystic_Fortune
That said, as much as I want to hate this abomination, Johnny Depp+Tim Burton movies are one of my guilty pleasures.
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'I don't like the look of it at all,' said the King: 'however, it may kiss my hand if it likes.'
'I'd rather not,' the Cat remarked.
'Don't be impertinent,' said the King, 'and don't look at me like that!' He got behind Alice as he spoke.
'A cat may look at a king,' said Alice.
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I agree, but your closing parenthesis is outside of your URL.
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Originally Posted by Clave_Dark_5
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'I don't like the look of it at all,' said the King: 'however, it may kiss my hand if it likes.'
'I'd rather not,' the Cat remarked.
'Don't be impertinent,' said the King, 'and don't look at me like that!' He got behind Alice as he spoke.
'A cat may look at a king,' said Alice.
Quote:
While I was attracted to the original series's serial format for a gothic story, the incredibly slow pace rather than the cheap production values proved the biggest obstacle. I wonder if a trufan has put together a supercut that compresses the drama. Jonathan Frid's performance stood out among the cast's, but he hardly ever revealed his fangs.|
Originally Posted by Hyperstrike
Basically it was a soap from the mid-60's that ran into the early 70's. About 6 months in, they changed from basically just a gothic theme to a goth/horror, first introducing ghosts, then Jonathan Frid as the the vampire Barnabas Collins.
What made it somewhat...unique was the fact that they pretty much did live-to-tape (essentially limiting the number of retakes) for EVERYTHING. So you can see actors heming and hawing their lines, bumping into props, stagehands and boom mics wandering into frame, etc.. |
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| And yes, it was campy. ESPECIALLY due to the errors mentioned above. |
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Originally Posted by Aneko
Just to clarify my position, and possibly that of some others: there may be nothing inherently wrong with this movie, but it should absolutely not pretend to be related to Dark Shadows.
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Originally Posted by Desi_Nova
well, at least Barnabas doesn't sparkle
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Originally Posted by Hyperstrike
We haven't seen the whole flick yet...
*SHUDDER* |
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Try finding the movie "House of Dark Shadows".|
Originally Posted by TrueGentleman
While I was attracted to the original series's serial format for a gothic story, the incredibly slow pace rather than the cheap production values proved the biggest obstacle. I wonder if a trufan has put together a supercut that compresses the drama. Jonathan Frid's performance stood out among the cast's, but he hardly ever revealed his fangs.
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Because they didn't have television censors, and because they were able to deal with multiple takes, the general quality of the story, acting, etc, etc is much better.
Clicking on the linked image above will take you off the City of Heroes site. However, the guides will be linked back here.
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Thanks for the tip - I see they're currently available for streaming on iTunes and Amazon and that a DVD edition will be published to tie in with the movie's release. That and the sequel "Night of Dark Shadows" sound like they're in the Hammer Films tradition.
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Originally Posted by Hyperstrike
Try finding the movie "House of Dark Shadows".
Because they didn't have television censors, and because they were able to deal with multiple takes, the general quality of the story, acting, etc, etc is much better. |
I left with the most enjoyable new party game of the year. Seriously, they should package this idea and sell it as an MMO. You could call it "Pitchmen Online."
My entry? [I/]Shakespeare's Henry V: The Movie.[/I] Henry performs Hong Kong fight choreography wire-fu in which he walks around on the arrows at Agincourt as they fly through the air, Falstaff is the wacky sidekick (played by Jack Black, of course) who spends most of the movie making flatulence jokes (he lives, in this version), Megan Fox is Catherine of France, and the Dauphin is a computer-animated cyborg (his cybernetics are powered by steam and waterwheels, though, so it's authentic, right?). The tagline: "BREACH!" (The whole "once more unto the" part is too complex for today's audience. Plus, think of the double entendres Black would do with this.) Hey, it could happen.
Then the next day, the stench would rise up to Heaven, and God would smite earth out of existence. Now THAT's a blockbuster ending!
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