Reasons NOT To Try Those Other Games

So I’ve heard a rumor… somewhere… that there is another super hero MMO or two on the horizon… I did a little research and discovered that this is more than just a rumor… Soooo… I did a little MORE research and would like to share my findings with my fellow Forumites.

Reasons why you shouldn’t play those OTHER hero games:

• One is based off a pen and paper game and rolling computer generated dice will never have the flair of rolling real ones… for example you can’t spin ‘em to see how long they go before they drop!

• The developers of one game kick puppies. The developers of the Other game kick puppies while wearing steel toed boots. (the developers have the boots… not the puppies)

• Rumors of acrobatic travel powers have been confirmed; what hasn’t been leaked is the vertigo and motion sickness caused by the graphical representation of this. The other game’s developers instantly responded to this problem… they all bought stock in the Dramamine company.

• Neither of these games have Blue Steel.

• During a panel of one of the developer panels someone asked if the player would be able to play along side or against such heroes as Uber-Super-Duper-Pooper-Scooper-Man. The developer said “yes” to that one. But when I asked if we would be able to get our characters powerful enough to meet ol’ USDPSM on even ground the Devs all got to laughing so hard one of them spewed a whole can of Coke through both nostrils…

• Rumors of them incorporating Big Red Ball are FALSE! In the demo the ball was CLEARLY maroon!

• I have investigated the Off Line Costume Creator one of them is offering. What I am going to do with 10 square yards of yellow spandex and a sewing needle I have no idea.

• Rumors that you will be able to use any power you want out of the gates are FALSE! Spontaneous generation of various deli meats in a multitude of forms and sizes is STILL not available. So much for my plans to create the Lunch Meat Legion.

• I figured out what to do with the yellow spandex and sewing needle. Now I’m under investigation for being a Public Nuisance and the local chapter of the Pikachu Fan Club has filed a restraining order on me.

• Rumors that you will get to create your own life-long Arch-Nemesis are true… however you can NOT control when they appear or what they do. After the 10th time your enemy shows up at the end of a 20 mission story arc and forces a mission fail and loss of rewards… you may start re-thinking the whole “it’s nice to have a mortal enemy thing.”

• The marketing campaign to push the whole Nemesis system is innovative… I’ll give them that… but having a paid actor show up dressed as your characters enemy at various social events in your real life is going a bit too far. I heard the bride in that one case just isn’t buying the whole “I had nothing to do with it” line from her former groom-to-be.

• Besides… NO NEMESIS plots like OUR NEMESIS plots.

• There’s nothing like creating a character from Krapton and bringing them under the influence of earth’s yellow sun… and discovering that despite every ounce of comic book lore on your side that would certainly win you a thrilling victory in any court of geek law… you STILL have to start out at level one power and work your way up.

• I have to give them props though… the cake was NOT a lie…. But it still tasted like s**t…

Edit: I would like to add this small note to those people who either don't know me that well yet or who think the new games being introduced is a very serious subject. This post is meant entirely as a joke and/or parody of the other.. more serious.. "other game" posts out there. I have not played the beta versions of any of these games, I have not done ANY research to substantiate anything I have said above.. I have done what I usually do when I make these silly little lists... I sit in front of my computer with a Word Doc up and let my mind wander and see what it's dragging in its mouth when it returns. I personally only have one reason for my lack of desire to play other games: Loyalty to this one.

Dear lord... now I've been serious in one of my own posts... ugh.. I need to go bathe.

There is no reason NOT to try those other games.
I want everyone to try them so they can see I am right.
But, in the offchance they feel I am wrong... Then...
They are just an anomoly.
I can't be right all the time, but I can come close.

*weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee*

CoX > All?

Actually, try the other games. Try them. I've tried my share of other games after playing this one. Even the dreaded WoW. All that did was make me realize just how good this one is by comparison. This game has ruined me forever--all other games just seem lame for one reason or another. Some games have really good features, but they almost all have inevitable holes that this game doesn't have. This is the only game that I've played that gets it right EVERYWHERE AT ONCE. And unless it starts looking more like those other games, I'll be here until they pull the plug--hopefully many, many years down the road.

Have any of these other games introduced the capacity to inflict misery, pain and destruction upon Rhode Island?

I thought not. ^_^

I, for one, object to Something Odiously Eternal being characterized as storm-trooperesque steel booted thugs kicking puppies.







They haven't had puppies for some time now.

Reason # 457 not to try those other games:

No Steelclaw. 'Nuff said.

I buy every game that comes out and try them all, but none has ever kept my attention over a week except this game, for 63+ months and ongoing. I've even tried the other mentioned above, and I just don't see it. Plain and simple truth.

In all (semi-)seriousness, CoX has spoiled me for other MMOs in a number of areas. One of the most critical, to me, is the fluidity and natural feel of character movement. Every other MMO I've tried had, in comparison, a very jerky, twitchy sort of feel to it. Completely messes up my immersion (RP'er, you see...), and just generally looks craptastic.

In addition, CoX has one of the most responsive dev teams around. I don't always agree with what they do, but I've never felt as if they were disconnected from the player base.

I'm not a comics fan (haven't bought one in...well...in a very long time). For me to have been such a dedicated player of this game is obviously based on something other than a love for the genre. With the exception of Matrix Online (which had too many major issues), this is as close as it gets to the "MMO Noir" game I really want. Becasue I'm not a fan of the genre, other superhero games would only appeal if I thought they'd improve on both the gameplay and on the community. I'm not getting that impression...

I heard that while Paragon Studio endorses strawberries, the various competitors are outspoken opponents of strawberries. That alone stands testament to their immense inferiority.

You know, it occurs to me...

Things must be sad indeed when Steelclaw has to add a disclaimer to parody. I blame the puppies. Puppies and Broccoli.

"Infernal intelligent implants are insidiously invading our inner-sanctum and inserting its inhuman intent into our infrastructure. Indeed we infer this incursion to include infants and the infertile, implying its inside impulse into our intuition and inebriating our inclination to interpose their injurious inclinations. Inept; our invulnerability to infiltration, Impotent; our insurrection. Inside our independance is isolated and our intestines irritate at the irrepressible infection. Inevitably, infusion is imperfect as internal ire impeaches the intruder until its intricate intention is imposed internally."

I HATE Broccoli! (unless you add cheese.) Oh no! It has me!

I used to try trials and come back to this game feeling it was better. Now it just seems that my interest in MMOs are waning. I hope GR will fix that.

For once I thought Steelclaw would be serious.