Power Customization: EX-TREEEEME!

So with the advent of Issue 16 we will be taking the first tentative steps into the realm of Power Customization. This is a good thing. I, for one, am looking forward to being able to color my powers whichever way I like to make my characters even more unique.

However…

It gets me thinking of where this could eventually lead… If somehow Power Customization could become absolute… If I could somehow program the appearance and actions of my powers… Hmmmm….

Steelclaw’s Power Customizations:

• Deluded Secret Service: Formerly known as Force Field Generation, this power would summon a contingent of Secret Service dressed in sharp black suits. These people would be deluded into thinking that the target of the power was the President of the United States. Any incoming attack would cause them to throw themselves in front of it screaming “I must protect the President!” Once they had taken enough damage to kill them they would enact a long, melodramatic death scene. “Is… is the President safe? Th… thank God… a… at least… the world.. will.. .. will still be safe… for… de…. Democracy… ack.”

• Wool Pants in Winter: Formerly known as Electricity Manipulation. This set would actually require a re-write of how the player moves. Instead of the usual running animation, the player will shuffle wherever he goes, scuffing his feet on the ground and briskly rubbing his wool pants’ legs together. Then, giggling madly, he will touch his target to discharge the static electricity he built up. This could also be used for Electrical Blast, I suppose, but the giggling would have to be escalated to a mad cackle.

• Belly Bucking Behemoth: Formerly known as Energy Manipulation. All that knockback in so many melee attacks… Repulsor blasts are so passé though. How about…. A Sumo Wrestler-sized guy with a bullseye target painted on his belly?! Instead of punching with glowing fists, this guy just leaps at you with his enormous beer gut and bumps you clear across the screen! For Build Up and Conserve Power animations he chugs a beer. I imagine this one would be the new Flavor of the Month over on Pinnacle.

• Violating the Teen Rating: Formerly known as Illusion Control. If this level of Power Customization ever appears in the game the Devs will probably just axe Illusion Control right out of the gate. It would be safer. Letting hormone-ridden adolescent boys (and girls) get their hands on a set that can create any illusion they like would probably get out of hand very quickly. On the other hand… The illusion of a BLEEP wearing a spiked BLEEP-on BLEEP and BLEEPING the BLEEP out of her enemies would make Spectral Wounds a bit more interesting. Also you can bet that every Phantom Army power would be six slotted with Recharge Reduction… or maybe Endurance.

• Homage to Lusca: Formerly known as Plant Control. Someone out there (not me.. not this time..) will be tempted to change all the vines and roots in this one into tentacles. You know, I’m beginning to re-think the whole Extreme Power Customization thing… between this power set and the Illusion Control re-make we’re going to end up as City of Hentai.

• All-You-Can-Eat-Night At Barney’s Bean Burrito Bistro: Formerly known as Radiation Emission. ‘Nuff said.

• Duct Tape Master: I was sitting here thinking of what would be a good set for Duct Tape application when I realized that almost ALL of them are! Duct Tape wrapped around the player for an excellent personal defense set. Duct Tape wrapped around others for a defense buffing Defender set. Duct Tape around your enemies for a Controller set! Heck, you can even Duct Tape wounds for an Empath set!! If it really caught on you’d end up seeing an entire team of vaguely humanoid gray blobs, hopping around awkwardly because their Duct Tape Defender taped their legs together.

• Drill Instructor Encouragement: Formerly known as Kinetics. Wearing the Smokey Bear and screaming at the approximate decibel equivalent of a 747 preparing for take off, the Drill Instructor Defender/Controller will not help their allies run faster, jump higher or fight harder… they’ll “encourage” them to do it themselves. You might want to turn your speaker volume way down for this one. My favorite animation will be the one for Inertial Reduction… which will show the Defender planting a swift boot to the affected player’s posterior, sending them into orbit.

And finally… how could we ignore the MasterMinds? Customization of the pets could lead to some rather… odd… choices:

• West Side Story Dance Team: Formerly known as Thugs. These guys will kick your a** and keep in rhythm all at the same time!
• Pandora’s Toy Box: Formerly known as Robotics. The low levels are made from Legos. The mids are those green plastic soldier toys. The high level is Teddy Ruxpin… and he’s got a LOT to say.
• Adolescent Mutant Ninja Furries: Formerly known as Ninjas. Why stick to just turtles? Your version of Noah’s Ark was a dark, dangerous place.
• Thriller Blood Spiller: Formerly known as Necromancy. Oh, come on! Like YOU wouldn’t make your zombies do the Thriller dance if you could. The best part is we went to a PvP zone and had these guys face off against a side-switched MM’s West Side Story thugs… We’re opening on broadway in two months!
• Special Deliverance: Formerly known as Mercenaries. Red-colored-necks from the deepest woods of the Appalachian mountains loaded down with rifles and shotguns and more chewing tobacco than some small countries. I won’t go into details as to what attack is granted by Tactical Upgrade… but yes… it DOES involve animal noises.

Drugs are bad mmmmmkay?

*laughs and promptly inhales water up her nose*

Michelle
aka
Samuraiko/Dark_Respite

"You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Steelclaw again." Darnit.

Where did "EX-TREEEEME" come from, again? Was it an episode of Mystery Science Theater?

Pffft. Kids these days. (And that goes for the Stargate writers too!) The Centurions!

Yet another classical Steelclaw moment.

An alternate for Dual Pistols: "The Gunflinger".

Ever notice how Superman always took bullets in the chest, but ducked when they threw the empty gun at him? So, don't bother with bullets at all; carry around a boatload of empty guns, and throw them!