Arc Reviews


13th_Stranger

 

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Also would like to get feedback for my arc 3483, also linked in my sig. Will check out some more of these arcs tonight!


 

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Specific Review:

This is one of those arcs that make ALOT of assumptions on the character. It assumes you are a world dominating obsessed villian with a draconian management style. It assumes you have a rival and assumes you have henchmen.
To this I say....So what.
The arc felt very much like James Bond meets Venture Brothers from a villians point of view. It may not fit your character, in fact it probably won't. But its fun as hell. Forget your characters goals and motives and just sit back for the show on this one. The use of a henchman as a contact is excellent in that it makes you feel as tho you are the one plotting not being given jobs to do. truth be told I had been looking for a way to do this with my villian arc and am now stealing this idea, or rather a variation of it. The only thing I might suggest is instead of a numbered henchman maybe make him just a henchman. That way you can go Darth Vader on him and have the player kill them for giving bad news only to have a new henchman the next time. You can have them introduce themselves each mission....just a thought.


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Deal. I'll trade you the henchmen for the killing them bit. I like that a lot.

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Mission 1: The henchmen foes look great, simple faceless masses with a info text to explain why you see them again and again. Well done. The map was a good smallish size for a kill all and enabled the pacing flow.
The only thing in this mission that bothered me was the use of /devices on everything. Although for some reason the foes did spam nades less and attack more than I noticed in previous missions it still bothered me. Did not mark you down for it tho. This is why there is a contradiction in my TL-Dr. The foe is annoying yet not as much as I thought it would be. Perhaps they are fixing it?


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I think its mainly because they're AR. They seem to get stuck in rifle mode and don't go back to the Nade. Ideally I'd give them no secondary at all, because I wanted to make sure they were relatively harmless, but that's not an option. Devices seems to be the next best option in that regard. Any suggestion on how to handle this without making them stronger would be greatly appreciated. Making them ridiculously easy to kill was sort of crucial to the design. Note that even the "boss" objectives are still Lts.

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Mission 3:
Doctor Reverb himself proved to be a challenge my first go and a chump my second go. I could not figure out what had caused this. Regardless, keeping your bosses moderatly weak might be a good idea as the story will flow faster if they are. And speed in a comedy arc is good...keeps the jokes flying.


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I'm thinking the Elites need to be toned down. They make life difficult for Mez types and I've noticed a few times they stack up and become much harder than I intended. I'm not totally certain but that could have been part of the problem. Reverb should probably be toned down as well, but it's hard to do so. Part of the problem might be Liquefy, which I can't take away without also taking the Bubble (which I like on him, but need to take from the Elites). I think I'll start by toning down the elites and see from there.

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Mission 4: For some reason the humor slowed at this point. I suspect that the arc is not fully completed. Some suggestiong would be to include humerous text to your rescues and collections. Make use of your 'clues' to add more jokes without it being thrust down a players throat. If they want to read more they will if not they won't. It can't really hurt you.
If I may be so bold, one of your rescues says that the player has your family and when you rescue him he says don't hurt Emily. I got the feeling of inside joke here. Instead maybe something like 'he has my goldfish' and 'don't hurt Wanda'. This way you have a joke that everyone is included on. The family thing was too serious for the arc IMO.


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Mission 4 was the last designed and apparently it shows. Originally I had mission 2 end with the minions prepping the final launch which was ready by the time you took care of Reverb. Too much happened without the players involvement, so I added this mission later. You make a lot of good points though, I definitely need to rewrite some of the more sinister lines. I think I was worried people would be upset if it made their villain seem less evil, but by mission 4 you've either accepted the satire or not, so its probably not an issue.

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Mission 5:The death chamber idea was great and done well but with no clue attached it was anticlimatic. Same with the rocket launching. Again, use clues to give more to your players who are enjoying your arc.
Also the goodbye text was more or less a throwaway. Give us the big picture...tell us exactly what your evil plan was. I don't care if its silly ...thats the point of this arc...have some fun.


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Wow, mission 5 totally failed from a storytelling perspective. Originally I had designed the thing to be a sort of "if you fall into the old cliches you fail, but you can take over the world if you ignore them". Monologuing to Fantastic (optional) would cause him to escape and if you couldn't kill him, he could get away with the info that stops your plan. Unfortunately, this led to a required objective based on an optional one and just didn't work. What actually happens now is if you monologue he escapes the deathtrap (you totally missed that, which is nobody's fault but mine) and you can kill him directly. That just... failed, miserably.

I think I'm just going to have to let go of my last intentions of keeping the situation generic and dive right in. You noticed the other aspects of that (the "project" is never defined, etc), but it seems clear its already a penny for a pound kind of situation anyway. My original player driven narrative falls flat compared to my more heavily scripted missions that proceed it.

I think I'll just take the concept all the way. Force the player to monologue and let Captain F escape and potentially thwart the whole thing. It raises the stakes in the final mission considerably and gives me more characters to flesh things out. I can also tie in the characters of mission 4 a little to anchor that firmly into the rest of the story.

Much appreciate the feedback. It's been really helpful. I'll send you a PM once the arc is fixed up. Glad you liked it.


 

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Deal. I'll trade you the henchmen for the killing them bit. I like that a lot.

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Heh...no problem.

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I think its mainly because they're AR. They seem to get stuck in rifle mode and don't go back to the Nade. Ideally I'd give them no secondary at all, because I wanted to make sure they were relatively harmless, but that's not an option. Devices seems to be the next best option in that regard. Any suggestion on how to handle this without making them stronger would be greatly appreciated. Making them ridiculously easy to kill was sort of crucial to the design. Note that even the "boss" objectives are still Lts.

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I have found the lowest setting for regen on minions makes them very easy. Its my goto set for minions I don't want very tough.

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I'm thinking the Elites need to be toned down. They make life difficult for Mez types and I've noticed a few times they stack up and become much harder than I intended. I'm not totally certain but that could have been part of the problem. Reverb should probably be toned down as well, but it's hard to do so. Part of the problem might be Liquefy, which I can't take away without also taking the Bubble (which I like on him, but need to take from the Elites). I think I'll start by toning down the elites and see from there.


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It should be noted here that the elites refered to are not Elite Bosses but a foe called 'Reverb's Elites' and are LT level. Don't want anyone thinking you load up with EB's in the mission.

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Wow, mission 5 totally failed from a storytelling perspective. Originally I had designed the thing to be a sort of "if you fall into the old cliches you fail, but you can take over the world if you ignore them". Monologuing to Fantastic (optional) would cause him to escape and if you couldn't kill him, he could get away with the info that stops your plan. Unfortunately, this led to a required objective based on an optional one and just didn't work. What actually happens now is if you monologue he escapes the deathtrap (you totally missed that, which is nobody's fault but mine) and you can kill him directly. That just... failed, miserably.


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Wow...I played the mission twice and made sure to click the glowies. neither time did i run into Fantastic again. maybe just bad luck. A clue will work good in these areas...meaning the clue option in the MA so that you have something else to read.

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I think I'll just take the concept all the way. Force the player to monologue and let Captain F escape and potentially thwart the whole thing. It raises the stakes in the final mission considerably and gives me more characters to flesh things out. I can also tie in the characters of mission 4 a little to anchor that firmly into the rest of the story.


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Thats beautiful. Fits the overall story concept very well. Yes as a mega villian we should do this.

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Much appreciate the feedback. It's been really helpful. I'll send you a PM once the arc is fixed up. Glad you liked it.

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Looking forward to playing the revised arc.


 

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Uh... this is annoying. I'm running my own thing a day later and I'm finding things I didn't notice when I tested it @_@...


 

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"Arc Name: Astoria in D Minor
Arc ID: 41565
Arc Length: Medium/Long (5 missions, but they can be very quick and are stealthable for the most part)
Arc Difficulty: Easy. Support ATs might have some trouble but I didn't test on any so they might be fine.
Description: A horror arc about the search for a lost daughter in Dark Astoria. Meet an alien, a disturbed hero, and find out what it really means to survive."

This is one of the best I ave played. By a long shot. There is a very solid story backed by an underused and poorly represented group (Banished Pantheon). It is not too hard to solo (i played with a BS/WP scrapper) even on rugged. The story is great and the mission maps used fit perfectly. Number 2 and number 4 are the best maps ever.

I would detail the arc but it would take a lot away from the story. Kind of like telling people Bruce Willis is dead before taking them to see Sixth Sense. Not quite as dramatic but similar concept.

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As much as I appreciate the vote of confidence, I honestly don't mind if people spoil the story for the purpose of a review. Of course it's always better to experience a story without knowing much about it ahead of time, but I find reviews helpful as a writer, too.


Astoria in D Minor, a horror arc. Arc ID: 41565 - The Beating Heart of Astoria: A Play in Five Acts. Arc ID: 170547 - Ignition of the Machine, a story with robots. Arc ID: 318983
Captain Skylark Shadowfancy and the Tomorrownauts of Today. Arc ID: 337333 - Signal:Noise, where is everybody? Arc ID: 341194
@The Cheshire Cat - Isn't it enough to know I ruined a pony making a gift for you?

12 second horror stories - a writing experiment.

 

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Arc #1472, "Hearts on Fire"
tl;dr: 1 star. Offenses: Wall Banger Idiot Plot

"Epitaph", a member of the Skulls, wants you to pass "Sally" a note in study hall. OK, not really, but close enough. You're sent to a rave to check her out. "Sally" turns out to be "Salamander", a Hellion Boss. It also appears from her initial dialog that she's playing for the other team, If You Know What I Mean. Epitaph is undeterred. You are autolevelled to 13 for the whole arc (presumably 14 if you're on Heroic/Tenacious).

Your next task is to bust up a bank robbery Sally will be attending, and to find out more about her if you can. It turns out that while the bank is being robbed, Sally was only there to meet her friend Eliza, who is now a hostage. The robbers are Family, whom Sally helps you defeat. Epitath is too busy doing free throws with the Idiot Ball to put two and two together and says he's coming up with some more ideas. I started wondering if he'd prefer emo or country CDs when the inevitable happens.

In Act III it seems the Hellions have kidnapped Eliza. Epitaph wants you to save her, thinking this is some kind of internal power struggle. When you find Eliza she actually does appear to be held hostage, which is something of a surprise. She tells her captors that Sally has gone back to PCU to finish her degree, and they don't believe her. Epitaph tells you the next phase of his plan is "brilliant". I'm not expecting a Nemesis plot here....

...aaaand there's the Idiot Ball. Seems Epitaph lied to you, he knew Eliza was really holed up with the Hellions for safety while Sally beat up the Family a bit. Note that Eliza doesn't scream for help or anything when you beat up the Hellions; she goes with you willingly because she thinks you're Sally's friend after the robbery. Epitaph's plan is to keep Eliza stashed with his Skull buddies for a while, then "rescue" her to get in Sally's good graces. He gets upset when you take the "Rescue Eliza from the Skulls" option. His buddy Skullcrusher is frontloaded and implies that he and his crew have already subjected Eliza to a Fate Worse Than Death. A little farther in you find out that death was part of the bargain: she's been mutilated, and the Skulls took pictures during the process. So your hero is now implicated in kidnap, bodice ripping If You Know What I Mean and first-degree murder. Epitaph says "This isn't how it was supposed to happen! What have you done!" Um, dude....

Epitaph's next brilliant move is to go make a clean breast of things to Sally. As the accept option says "Are you crazy?" You then hear a report of an explosion in Atlas Park, where Sally lives, and Epitaph is off and running (it's inferred). The next mission is in the burning Hellion complex map and requires defeating Epitaph and Sally. Epitaph spawned in front and dropped me before I could click inspirations. After taking him out there was another Hellion Boss to deal with, then Sally, who has gone from Fire Blast/Fire Manipulation to Firey Melee/Fiery Aura. She blames you for Eliza's death (and why not), and says when she falls "Don't you see? She's in Heaven now...and I can never go there..." The final debriefing says Salamander gets life in the Zig and Epitaph can't go back to the Skulls, so he's pretty much suicidal.

I don't mind Downer Endings. I do mind plots that only work if all the main characters are morons. In fact the only thing keeping this from being a second-order Idiot Plot is the fact that Skullcrusher's guys do pretty much what Skulls would do in that situation (which isn't particularly smart, but at least it's in character). I also mind plots that turn my character into a felon...you'd be heading for the Zig (as much of a threat as that is) for your part in this too. I hate to trash it, as the story has a strong theme and in in principle is the kind of thing I'd like to see from Architects. But this needs a lot of rehabilitation.


Current Blog Post: "Why I am an Atheist..."
"And I say now these kittens, they do not get trained/As we did in the days when Victoria reigned!" -- T. S. Eliot, "Gus, the Theatre Cat"

 

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I think its mainly because they're AR. They seem to get stuck in rifle mode and don't go back to the Nade. Ideally I'd give them no secondary at all, because I wanted to make sure they were relatively harmless, but that's not an option.

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Primary and secondary powers can be set seperatly have you tried setting the secondary to AR Standard or even something weak like Willpower or regen standard?


AE # 67087: Journey through the Looking Glass - Save the World
LLX VirtueVerse! - Check out my crazy Toons
This is the size of group that we have balanced AVs for, 6.
-Positron 06/07/06 07:27 PM

 

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Wow. Although I see your point about everyone fighting over the Idiot Ball, it sounds like a very emotional story with a lot of attention to detail from your description.

I like your reviews, but I must say I want to check out this mission despite the single star.

Other than the wall banging, would you say it was well written? Were the other characters consistent (if idiotic), etc?


Story Arcs I created:

Every Rose: (#17702) Villainous vs Legacy Chain. Forget Arachnos, join the CoT!

Cosplay Madness!: (#3643) Neutral vs Custom Foes. Heroes at a pop culture convention!

Kiss Hello Goodbye: (#156389) Heroic vs Custom Foes. Film Noir/Hardboiled detective adventure!

 

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If you get a chance to get around to testing my Arc #38778 "The Enclave Strikes Back" and let me know what you think. Thanks


 

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(QR) If anyone would like to try my arc "The Monster Mash" 42928, I'd love to hear some feedback.


 

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Man, Venture...the thought of you possibly reviewing my Arcs actually scares me.

I doubt my tender ego could handle it.

btw...how about giving us your global so we can see what you've published. As detail oriented as you are, they must be really good ones.

On a side note, I created a single mission that is designed to do two things...introduce SG Members to the leaders...and explain our SG Policies.

I didn't want to make it overly tough, but I did want it to at least me tough enough to not be boring. So at lvl 50 on invincible, most mobs are yellow or orange, with very few purple (easy ones on my fire/kin). There are no EBs or AVs in it, but an occasional boss.

I WOULD like you to take a look at that...just to determine if changes could be made to improve it. It's designed for all levels.

The Mission Number is 63384. It shouldn't take long to do...maybe 20-30 minutes if you take your time.

I even designed a comic book cover for it at:
http://cohlegends.com/?p=121


 

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(QR) If anyone would like to try my arc "The Monster Mash" 42928, I'd love to hear some feedback.

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Gonna play it right now


 

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I think its mainly because they're AR. They seem to get stuck in rifle mode and don't go back to the Nade. Ideally I'd give them no secondary at all, because I wanted to make sure they were relatively harmless, but that's not an option.

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Primary and secondary powers can be set seperatly have you tried setting the secondary to AR Standard or even something weak like Willpower or regen standard?

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I knew they could be set separately, I just didn't know Regen offered a no toggle, no aura, minimal bonus set on Standard. All the other defensive sets I used had a full set of protection even on the lowest level. I assumed Regen was the same.

Nicely noted and planned to fix. Thanks. As a rule though I don't like giving mez protection to my mobs unless its a bubbler or some other high priority target. Since these guys are AR though I'll live with Resiliance's stun protection, but if they pull out the defiance thing in the future, I'll have to reconsider.


 

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Other than the wall banging, would you say it was well written? Were the other characters consistent (if idiotic), etc?

Yes, but the plot as it stands is unforgivable.

btw...how about giving us your global so we can see what you've published. As detail oriented as you are, they must be really good ones.

There is a link in my signature page to a quick-and-dirty web page on my arcs. Feel free to take revenge and review them (one person already has in this thread). My global is @Venture (@DFH on Test).


Current Blog Post: "Why I am an Atheist..."
"And I say now these kittens, they do not get trained/As we did in the days when Victoria reigned!" -- T. S. Eliot, "Gus, the Theatre Cat"

 

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Next Up Arc # 8928 (unless 45503 is back)

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45503 is back up, something in the patch made one of my bosses error out so i had to change his type and repub


AE # 67087: Journey through the Looking Glass - Save the World
LLX VirtueVerse! - Check out my crazy Toons
This is the size of group that we have balanced AVs for, 6.
-Positron 06/07/06 07:27 PM

 

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(QR) If anyone would like to try my arc "The Monster Mash" 42928, I'd love to hear some feedback.

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Okay, I just played this arc.

The character designs were great...actually inspiring. I do have ideas for improvement, but edit the published one and click republish so you don't lose the votes you have:

1) More details. They say the devil is in the details.
In this case, I think you went really light on them. It is the kind of mission that makes you want more details too...it's got that much potential. I'll explain below:

Character Desciptions: You mention the movies they appeared in...and that's it. While amazed that anyone would know this info, I would have liked to see more info...like maybe the actor that played the role, how the movie did at the time...and maybe even a brief desciption of the characters personality...heck, maybe you could make the description a mock Movie Review of the movie they appeared in...that would be really cool.

Dialog: I watched the NPC dialog...it seemed out of character to me...maybe you could have them speak like the characters in the movies? That might be hard with the Wolfman...or maybe not. Growls would be fitting for him.

The Ally: Too tough. He was taking out enemies almost faster than I could get screenshots (and I like the looks so much I DID get screenshots).

The Mission Complete Window: It came up blank. Was weird seeing a black, empty window pop up upon exit.

The only other thing I found disappointing was the length. One mission was too short...mainly because the concept is so good, I wanted to see how it could have been taken to the next step.

My suggestion is you find a way to make it into 5 missions...longer ones, add in a couple more monsters (the Mummy and the Creature from the Black Lagoon?)

And PM me the new id # so I can play it, because I'd REALLY like to do so.

I gave it 5 stars...even though it needs work, I felt it was a great concept...and I want to encourage you in making it bigger and better.

As a side note, you have no idea how tempted I am to make an Abott and Castello Meets Dracula arc now, lol.


 

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There is a link in my signature page to a quick-and-dirty web page on my arcs. Feel free to take revenge and review them (one person already has in this thread). My global is @Venture (@DFH on Test).

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Actually not thinking revenge...you haven't even reviewed my stuff. I was just noticing that you are well versed in the CoX history, and game developement, and I am interested in seeing how you apply it.


 

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Thanks for the kind words. I know it's a short arc, but it's really my first experiment with the MA system. To be honest I really like creating custom enemies. I have a couple others "Defeat the Sinister Syndicate" and "Defeat the Justice Patrol" that are just me indulging in character creation.
Incidentally, the movies mentioned in the character info are all fakes, since I wanted to avoid actually calling any published work by name. I've been trying to create a mummy character, but I'm having trouble getting a good costume together. I'd consider doing The Creature as well. What powers would I give them? Thanks for your review, and check out the arc in a week or two, I'll probably expand it.


 

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Arc #2180, "Bricked Electronics"
tl;dr: 4 stars. Offenses: "just a bunch of stuff that happened"

Marc Freeman wants you to check out the store he bought an old cell phone at because there's some suspicious data left on it. (He kind of talks down to the player at this point, which is not a good idea...yes, some characters have a room-temperature IQ and thing the TV remote has imps in it that change the channels, but some are geniuses who invented their own nanotech-based symbiotic AIs.) Level cap for this one is 20 (19 for me). The shop is being robbed by Goldbrickers when you get there, and the owner is not in...the schedule you find shows he wasn't supposed to be in today. You do get his contact information.

For Act II. Freeman contacts the shop's owner and finds out where he buys his refurbished cell phones from. You're sent in to check out that warehouse. It turns out to be infested with Clockwork along with another kind of tiny robot, "Constructs" (in fact, the Clockwork are assigned to the same faction). There was a Boss robot (optional objective) named Barometer with Energy Melee/Storm powers, which didn't last long. You find two boxes of repaired cell phones which seem to be in nearly new condition, and a young girl named "JJ Cartwright" who gives you a near-Freakshow technoanarchist rant and tells you she would have turned the robots off it she'd known you only wanted to know where she got her scavanged goods from. Freeman arranges for her to get a better job with the PPD.

The phones are traced to a cave some vent systems have collapsed into; Freeman hypothesises that people have been dumping stuff there to make it vanish. You're sent in to check out the cave. The data he's been able to recover from the cell phones implies a bank robbery is being planned. " Yeah. Villains want to rob a bank. I know you're surprised." Entering the cave you find...a Council base. Being attacked by Clockwork. I immediately found a glowie (2 total, plus beat the Big Bad) with cute "time bar" text: "Man, what kind of person crates up trash?" The crates contains various broken high-tech goodies. The Boss summons at least one ambush wave to support him, and adds a "3 gas cylinders to destroy" objective with no explanation. (His defeat clue just laments all the trash falling into his base and hopes the Zig is cleaner.) Addition of this objective effectively turns the mission into a defeat-all and makes you run the map twice. Not appreciated. In the debriefing Freeman calls JJ and asks why she sent you into a Council base without warning. Her answer was "why didn't he just turn his cloaking device on?" Freeman notes he has to talk to her about what kinds of tech the average person has. (Venture actually has a stealth IO...in the other build. Wouldn't have helped, of course.)

For Act IV, Freeman has managed to pull photos from the cell phones that reveals where they're hiding. He still doesn't have more info on their planned robbery, but you can get that by going there and busting heads. After accepting the mission Freeman tells you that a Rogue Isles newspaper you found back in Act I that was of interest to the Goldbricker Boss had an editorial in it denouncing Paragon City's banks for seizing unclaimed property in the wake of the Rikti War. I was going to criticize the plot here for implying that there was enough time following the Rikti War for unclaimed property laws to kick in, but a quick trip to Google determined that the state assumes control of unclaimed bank accounts after 3 years in most case in Rhode Island (and NJ, as it happens...I thought it took much longer. Wonder if this has changed lately. Enough digression.) When you get on-site, you find JJ has sent you a little help (literally), some of her robots as allies. Unfortunately several of them spawned in the same place with their guards, turning the area into a deathtrap. After getting back, I found two computers, one of which had an article on the "Committee to Re-Elect the President" that is supposedly suspicious, and a Goldbricker Boss with a large spawn of guards...but at this point I had two Minions and an LT for backup. The Boss does have some nice banter, complaining about how Aeon Tech is all over the place in the Isles and the selection is so much better here. Freeman tells you afterwards that the 70s propaganda piece is code, not encryption, so he can't tell what they're talking about. At least not right away.

Or soon enough, as it turns out. Act V's briefing tells you the heist is going down: a bank is scheduled to bring out abandoned safe deposit boxes for transfer to the state, and the Goldbrickers have used a virus to send off an email cancelling the extra security. (This is tossing the Idiot Ball at minor characters, as no security outfit worth working with would fail to show up just because of an email.) Unfortunately, JJ was around when Freeman heard about this, so you've got 10 minutes to get in there before all hell breaks loose. JJ spawns up front as a LT Bots/Kinetics. You have to rescue her, secure two crates of deposits and beat the Big Bad in 10 minutes. Since it's a small bank map that's not too hard. One of the clues directs your attention to some names on one of the boxes, Orin Marsh and Mr. Geno. Freeman can't find anything on either name, but notes that the account had a huge amount of cash in it, and despite not being accessed for decades was still listed as active, making him suspect tampering.

The arc has good action and a decent plot, though no real theme. There are no EB/AVs or any deliberate attempts to kill the player. I do think JJ gets a bit more screen time than she's entitled to but she's not an author insert as far as I can tell. I'd remove the "package" in Act IV and cut down on the Big Bad's guards. The ending is somewhat anticlimactic as you don't really get told what the plan was...it's inferred that the Goldbrickers needed to retrieve the money in that account because the increased attention being paid to unclaimed accounts revealed it, but that could stand to be made more explicit.


Current Blog Post: "Why I am an Atheist..."
"And I say now these kittens, they do not get trained/As we did in the days when Victoria reigned!" -- T. S. Eliot, "Gus, the Theatre Cat"

 

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Arc #16108, "Less Mew Mew, More Pew Pew"
tl;dr: 2 stars. Offenses: unfunny joke arc, too many EB/AVs (any) for a joke arc, phoned in a lot of text

An unnamed SWAT Officer wants you to remove an infestation of catgirls from his weapons warehouse (evidently, he's stationed on Virtue). The warehose is filled with catgirls using Claws and Super Reflexes, Willpower or Energy Aura, which may make this problematic for some. The Big Bad is Snow Lion, a Fire Blast/Ice Armor EB who, on agro, hit Aim and Inferno for a 95% chance to kill me instantly. She went down on the rematch. A Clue tells you that someone has scheduled a furry convention in Paragon City and the main speaker is Bobcat. It also asks who could plan such a diabolical thing. I smell brass. You only get "Good job." for the debriefing...that's the whole thing.

Act II's briefing says the city is being overrun by catgirls (and this is different from everyday life how...OK, not everyone plays on Virtue). Your new job is to take down Bobcat to find out where the convention is. She was as much of a pain as usual, summoning one ambush wave. I ended up using Elude after she hit Unstoppable, mostly out of laziness (could have just used another Luck). Your debriefing this time is "Well done."

For the third and final map you have to defeat the convention organizer, who is, say it with me now...

...Nemesis.

Yeah. His defeat test is "OK, so it WAS all a Nemesis plot." Final debriefing, "So... it WAS all a Nemesis plot afterall."

It's supposed to be funny, but it's two missions too long for the joke. (I have a similar mission in an arc I'm working on, which I'll now have to consider removing.) It's also got too much firepower for a joke arc. A lot of the debriefings and such are kind of phoned in as well.


Current Blog Post: "Why I am an Atheist..."
"And I say now these kittens, they do not get trained/As we did in the days when Victoria reigned!" -- T. S. Eliot, "Gus, the Theatre Cat"

 

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Thanks for the kind words. I know it's a short arc, but it's really my first experiment with the MA system. To be honest I really like creating custom enemies. I have a couple others "Defeat the Sinister Syndicate" and "Defeat the Justice Patrol" that are just me indulging in character creation.
Incidentally, the movies mentioned in the character info are all fakes, since I wanted to avoid actually calling any published work by name. I've been trying to create a mummy character, but I'm having trouble getting a good costume together. I'd consider doing The Creature as well. What powers would I give them? Thanks for your review, and check out the arc in a week or two, I'll probably expand it.

[/ QUOTE ]
You got me toying around...closest I could get to the Mummy was bio...with white and gray...and some flys tossed in. It's a little shiny...but is the best I could come up with.

As far as his powers, I would give dark melee and dark armor under scrapper. The visuals might tone down the shine...maybe.

On the creature...hmmn. I;d bet the costume would be fairly easy, except for webbed feet and fingers...but powers?

Maybe Superstrength and...Super Reflexes? But set his strength to a lower setting than Frankenstein.

Incidently...you could also add the Bride of Frankenstein...

Horror movie themes are king of tempting...Jason vs Freddy for example. Aliens. Barney.

All of those can be pretty scary.


 

Posted

On the off-chance that people aren't overloaded with reviewing, I hope someone can review one of my arcs. Either one, really.

Creator: @theHedoren

Arc Name: The Double-Edged Sword
Arc ID: 4384
Length: Long
Difficulty: Medium- Final mission contains 1 AV, but with optional Allies; a few collections, several rescues (Captives and Allies)
Synopsis: Crey's latest experiments unleash a powerful force on Paragon City.

Arc Name: Dr. Dave and the Copper Legion
Arc ID: 60280
Length: Very Long
Difficulty: Medium- Final mission contains 1 AV, but with two Allies; many collections, some captives to rescue, an escort mission
Synopsis: An expedition to Cimerora uncovers and ancient weapon which -- in the wrong hand -- could destroy all of Paragon City. Plenty of mystery, some danger, and an obscure CoH villain.

The only reason I post two is 'cause I can't decide which one I'm more invested in. Any reviews at all would be helpful.

*edit- After some thought, I'd like to know what people think of the newer one, 60280.


Rise of the Copper Legion (#60280; with soundtrack)
The Fractured Dreamer (#498588; with musical theme)

"Now Leaving: Paragon City": original composition for the end of CoH

 

Posted

Arc 8928
A Career of Evil
Length: 5 Missions
Foes: Nemisis, Prisoners, Security Guards, Custom
Level Range: 35-38
Contact: David Lake (custom)
Rating: 1 star

TL-DR
Pros: Arc Idea is interesting (sorta)
Cons: Author's characters inserted badly, too long, annoying foes, badly written, awful plot twist, too many allies, immersion breaking

Overview

David lake has a job for you. A richboy philantropist (sp?) has created a new free energy source at the same time Crey has created a new powersource they wish to sell. Lake was hired to destroy the free one so Crey can sell theirs. He hires you to help.
The kicker is the lab with the new powersource is incredibly well guarded. This means you need to collect an assortment of allies and items to pull the job off.
First up, you need to bust a Freakshow out of prison who has special power over machines. Lake has a corrupt Longbow Officer so you bust in while a riot occurs.
With getting the Technopath out of the way you need a special EMP bomb to disable the security at the lab and Lake know where one is. A Nemisis lab. Trick is the bomb is in a specially locked safe that only one person knows the combination to...and he had his tongue removed so he couldn't say it. Thats where a Rikti telepath defector comes in. You break in the Nemisis base with Lakes partner in crime Red, a Family boss. V'Zenzo Pr'Jyah, the Rikti, is already inside. You need to get the Rikti telepath to the base's commander and have him rip the combination from his mind.
Next up you need both the head scientist and Hayato, the richboy, to break the security on the lab. There is trouble with this as bot the head scientist and Hayato are formidable opponents. Hayato himself is rumored to be a world class Martial Artist and assassin. As a result you can't just drag the two of them around the lab when you break in there. The scientist codes are voice printed so you just need a recording but Hayato is the real problem. Enter The Chameleon. A shapeshifter who can copy a person down to their DNA. He just needs to touch them.
Takes a bit but you manage to find The Chameleon, who is posing as a buxom woman, and defeat the two men.
Next its off to the first stage of the sabaotauge. Here you need to break into the labs airlock and disable a security computer. The Chameleon and Technopath go in first to open security door to open the way to the computer. Problem is when you show up someone has set off the alarms and you only have an hour before everything is re-routed and you loose your window to get to the new powersource data. Worse yet the highly aware robots guarding the lab are now activated.
A first you and the Technopath think its the clumsy Chameleon who did it but it turns out Nemisis used your kidnapping of the scientist and Hayato to replace them with Automatons.
Still you manage to destroy the Automatons and destroy the security computer. Which opens the path to the actual lab, wherein you can plant the EMP destroying the data, earning Crey and you alot of money. The kicker here is that your destruction of the security computer activated a more advanced security bot which you must get past.
To ensure you are able to pull this off everyone joins in. Red, Lt Peridot, the Chameleon, the Technopath and even David Lake.
After a long fought battle you set off the EMP destroying the data on the new powersource earning everyone alot of money. The only drawbacks are Hayato escaped and is now gunning for you And the Advanced Robot may also have escaped. Lake goes into hiding and suggests you do as well.

Specific Review:
Sadly there is only one thing I like about this arc, the idea of a Ocean 11 heist type job. The problem is the entire arc is poorly put togeher with NPCs who steal all the spotlight. In the entire arc you are nothing more than hired muscle.

Mission 1: The idea of breaking out a guy you need isn't original but its a nice opening mission and the Zig escape map is perfect for this. This is where things fall apart though. Lake has a corrupt Longbow officer as a friend to help you here. Thats not an issue in fact I kinda like that a bit. It's ruined by the fact that every Longbow on the map isn't hostile to you and the prisoners think you are a hero. remember you are at least level 30 on this mission...long enough to have made a name as a villian. This is like saying you and your past deads mean nothing. In effect, it just furthers the feeling you are just hired muscle. Another issue here is when you rescue the Technopath you need to fight past a Family boss who wants his radio back to listen to a game. Thats ok I guess but he is after a radio during a prison riot??? And he is in a full suit???? Dosn't make alot of sense. Aother issue is that the Teechnopath is a bot/devices ally (no the /devices didn't bug me here). Whats wrong is that he seems to be extreme/extreme, which puts you in the backseat in every fight hereafter because you now have a Longbow boss and a superduper powerful MM with you.

Mission 2: Rob Nemisis?? WTF??? A guy who cut his tongue out so he can't say a combination. Even the author mentions he can write it down but dismisses that idea by saying he would rather die. Problems abound in this mission. First you don't actually need to defeat the Nemisis Boss to get the combo, I found the safe before I found the Rikti and before I found the boss. Second, you have two allies again making you fairly useless here. Third the mission debriefing has your contact make an offhand comment about Nemisis comin after you. Lastly, and I admit this may be nitpicking, the name V'Zenzo Pr'jyah didn't feel very Rikti to me.

Mission 3: Giant map just destroyed the missions flow. Long stretches without any foes to fight, not that it was an issue because they were all security guards who are a cakewalk. Then you run into the scientist who is an elite boss. His powers are explained in his bio in a way that feels very 'i just want another fight' way. he is also incredibly dismissive in the entire fight saying whatever have your codes...making you feel like it was a big waste of time. Speaking of the codes... the lab has this incredible level of security but it can be broke by a taperecorder? (Ok he does say a high quality recording but still) Then Hayato shows up and he is all 'I am so cool I have powers and have manipulated the Crey to become rich and am still screwing with them'. I really wanted to quit at this point. But I pressed on.

Mission 4: Very annoying foes in this one. Elec assault (dom set) can be brutal in large numbers as it eats your end away fast. couple this with the foes being able to see through stealth and you have an annoying mob...not overpowered...just makes me go 'uggh another mob I can't avoid in anyway'. With the foes improved perception they could see farther which meant alot more accidental aggro than usual. This isn't a bad thing usually, but with the end drain it was annoying. I suggest changing the Elec assault to energy assault but don't change the perception value. Having both Chameleon and the Technopath here again made me feel useless in the fights that I couldn't avoid. Plus they attack anything including the destructible object which spawned a very large ambush. in trying to contain it another group was aggroed resulting in a fight with 2 spawns and a huge ambush. On my IO'd scrapper it wasn't an issue, on my corruptor it was very much an issue. I don't know what to say about the inclusion of the Nemisis automatons of the EB's you fight in the last mission. It added absolutely nothing to the story other that another fight (and more annoying exposure to characters I found silly before). And the small foes concept has gotten to me. Every darn mission I play has foes in the tiny range. As a minor note, why couldn't the Technopath just make the bots stop attacking? This broke immersion badly.

Mission 5: Due to the MA I planted the EMP very early in both runs which meant there was no reason to ever face the awful EB/AV at the end. Having so many allies makes you again useless...actually it makes you nothing more than a guide as I never tossed a single attack until the end fight.
And the last guy was just plain bad. A big robot with insanly high defence and end draining attacks. After missing ALOT on my IO'd scrapper I just backed off and watched the bazillion allies take him down in seconds....again his parting 'i'll be back' just made the fight seem pointless. And the fact that the big bads escaped and want revenge just made me go huh why I did nothing really the entire time????

I gave this one star just because I wanted to play a 'Heist' type mission. To fix this arc it would need a total rewrite. Ditch the Nemisis angle, give the player more of a role, LESS ALLIES and not as powerful. Change the bots attack set, Remove all the 'My NPC's are so cool' stuff. If you can do that I may play it and re-rate it but honestly it was a real chore the first time...it would take alot to make me want to try it again.

Next Up: 45503 (if it is indeed back, havn't checked)


 

Posted

Please note that I am still not accepting requests for reviews; I'm still very much backed up. If I've added right (and I'm sure Arcanaville will correct me if I haven't....) I've reviewed 25 arcs so far with an average rating of exactly 3 stars.

Current queue: 1152, 33034, 12669, 1285, 1009, 8774, 8787, 8795, 1665, 12798, 16338, 9028, 2036, 32865, 3615, 19226, 19231, 19238, 4727, 2019, 27136, 34452, 8713, 2409, 1579, 1571, 1831, 18145, 38226, 2922, 1356, 26931, 2142, 2150, 42221, 5299


Current Blog Post: "Why I am an Atheist..."
"And I say now these kittens, they do not get trained/As we did in the days when Victoria reigned!" -- T. S. Eliot, "Gus, the Theatre Cat"

 

Posted

[ QUOTE ]

Primary and secondary powers can be set seperatly have you tried setting the secondary to AR Standard or even something weak like Willpower or regen standard?

[/ QUOTE ]

A word of warning using Willpower as the secondary It gives customs Sniper-like perception. It's really hard not to aggro multiple groups of Willpower foes.


My first short story (detective fiction) came out in Jan-2012. Other stories and books to follow, I hope. Because of "real writing". COH was a big part of that happening.