[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Here's my arc:
Arc Name: Twisting Time
Arc ID: 15528
Faction: Neutral
Creator Global/Forum Name: @BlackSkull
Difficulty Level: Hard on higher difficulties
Contains some custom characters
Synopsis:
It's fairly story heavy so you get a pretty good explanation as you play, has to do with time travel, but the title kinda gives that away.
Spent the better part of 2 days tweaking this one so any feedback would be appreciated
[/ QUOTE ]
Just gave this a run through solo on Heroic. I noted down some of the typos I noticed and general comments.
---- Possible spoilers after this line
Mission 1:
No spelling errors, fairly standard opening mission. Nothing wrong to my eye. EB Dr. Aeon to defeat at the
Mission 2:
A few typos and comments about the briefing:
<ul type="square">[*]"...not to late to fix things,we just need..." => "...not to
o late to fix things, we just need..." - An 'o' need to be added to "too" and a space after the comma.[*]"Stabilizer" has an 'i' missing (reads stablizer)[*]"...will work, well, it will..." => "...will work; well, it will..." - the first comma could become a semi-colon to avoid running on the sentence.[*]The entire first sentence about sending me to get the parts could be removed. It reads a little repetitious as it is.[*]The phrase "ironically enough" could be enclosed in commas, as an aside remark.[*]The final sentence which starts "Oh, and, ...": The comma after the "and" could be removed. Maybe make it italic or encase it in asterisks to add emphasis. "Oh, *and* you'll need to...".[/list]
Into the mission:
Lots of boss encounter spawns. Are they really necessary?
The patrols are speaking as though they've seen me already. Patrol text should generally be idle chatter or flavour text.
The clues you get from the glowies aren't really very descriptive. Maybe write something about how they look or feel or sound like, etc.
Popup on exit is missing a period at the end.
Mission 3:
Nothing amiss in the briefing as far as I can see.
Into the mission:
Eh? Council base? Stop a robot? Defeat Requiem?
Another EB to fight.
Why does Requiem's dialogue have a German accent? I thought he was Italian.
Job done, but the whole mission seemed a little out of place. There was no real narrative to explain what happened or why I was there, and the contact just shrugs it off.
Mission 4:
Ok, briefing's fine. Into the mission.
Small map, some Arachnos and suddenly a custom boss. He hits pretty hard and has lieut accomplices. Took me a couple of defeats to take him down. Slightly bothersome, but a challenge.
Another period missing on the popup.
Mission 5:
Small typo in the briefing: Did you mean "special prison" or "spatial prison"? At the moment it reads "spacial".
Into the Mission:
Small map, patrols of random mobs. Nice touch.
The Nemesis patrol's comment about not being in Peregrine any more kind of repeats the reference in the 3rd mission's popup though.
The Cimerorans' comment of "How dist we get here?" is taunting my pedantry gland. If you were trying for a Olde English style dialogue, it should be "didst". But even then, they're
Roman 
Another boss. Different sets, still with a couple of lieut cohorts. Again, a little annoying but doable.
Destroyed the objectives, now the last guy.
Popped my powers and some insps, engaged the EB. Electric melee and Inv, oh goody.
Fianlly took him down after about 15 mins and a couple of defeats after he used his Unstoppable.
Arc over.
---- Possible spoilers before this line.
Ok, overall, that wasn't a bad arc. The story has a lot of good ideas in it, although they could do with a bit more fleshing out narrative wise. Maybe some clues on mission completion.
That third mission seemed completely out of place to me, I felt there wasn't any real point to it. If you can tie it in better with the plot, it might work.
There seemed to be a little too much emphasis on EBs and AVs (bosses and EBs for scaled down soloing) for my liking, almost every mission had at least one. Furthermore, the second mission had lots of deliberate boss encounters placed around the map. They seem a little unnecessary in my mind. Maybe a couple for flavour text, that's all. If you were triyng for a challenging arc, then fair enough, I retract my criticisms about the bosses; but I feel a lot of ATs might get a little frustrated about some of the encounters if they try soloing.
So in conclusion, a rather solid arc that could become even better with a little more cohesiveness in the narrative and maybe some tweaks to the encounters and custom foes.
------------
I guess now I post my arc for judgement:
Arc Name: Mission: Muffet
Arc ID: 15390
Faction: Heroic
Creator Global/Forum Name: (@)LLamaBoy
Difficulty Level: Should be soloable by essentially everyone on Heroic, could be more challenging in a team or with a higher difficulty.
Synopsis: A short adventure of betrayal, loyalty and danger. Starts with an unexpected recruit to the Malta Operative.
Estimated Time to Play: Around 30-60 minutes depending on personal clearing preference and reading speed.
Link to More Details or Feedback: Discussion thread
Be honest, thanks
[/ QUOTE ]
Thanks for the feedback, it was really helpful, will definitely do some more to flesh things out a bit. All the bosses in the second mission is to give it a feel of the heavily guarded base the contact talks about, it's supposed to be kinda difficult, they hate people stealing their things.
