Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
November 9, 2005
"Okay, Mr. Shui," say Bo. "You got hose connected to tub of magic, ink-removing Calgon?!"
"Check, Bo!" Say Mr. Shui.
"Let 'em have it," say Bo.
Next thing you know all that magic ink that give Tsoo their super-powers start dissolving right into street and down into gutter. Them all standing there all small-time and Bo Bindel crew gonna go big-time big time on 'em!
"Alright, Troll Twins," say Bo. "Let loose with the flanks!"
Dunnovel and Dunnogard dunking hands into two barrels of all those pig parts. We start hitting them with left flanks and right flanks like Bo big-time Hannibal general some stuff.
Them Tsoo no know what to do. They running all around in front of Super King China Buffet and trying to get away.
"Okay, Svrgyn," say Bo. "We starting in on 'em with fortune cookies now!"
Pop, pop, pop goes tons of pre-packaged fortune cookies all over Tsoo all over again. Their skinny b-tts getting knocked back all the way to Independence Port.
"Wooh hooh, Tsoo!" Me saying, "You know gonna shake-down this part of Steel Canyon no more cuz Super King China Buffet is Bo Bindel territory!"
Bo Bindel crew win big-time!
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Meanwhile, deep below the city streets, two seemingly garden-variety sewer rats scamper among the city's garbage and waste.
"Hey, Lloyd," says super-powered rat #1. "Some thing weird happened when all that tattoo ink came pouring down from the street and on me.
"I can talk, stand upright and I think I have super powers."
"Yeah. me too, Bert," says super-powered rat #2. "So now what do we do?"
"Well," says Bert. "I guess we should find some teenage turtles and teach 'em to be ninjas."
"I don't even know that I like turtles," says Lloyd.
Bert: "Ah, f--- it. Let's just gnaw some s---."
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
November 10, 2005
"Hey, Bo," say Svrgyn. "Remember that time we let loose all the Clockwork Knights on the kidney dialysis floor of the hospital?"
"Heh. Heh." Say Bo, "Yeah."
"And remember that time when Beovark couldn't recognize his reflection for a week and kept smashing windows some stuff."
"Yeah. Heh. Heh," me say.
"And remember at Troll Twins, initiation we tape 'kik me' sign to Dunnovel? Crippleganger following him around all day with him big feet," Svrgyn asking.
"Ha. Hah. Ha. Hah," say Bo.
"Yeah, we had some good times, Bo," Svrgyn say. "And about my attendance problem lately...."
"You no nevermind about that," say Bo. "We got too much stuff going on with Junior missing and Beovark gone. It okay but you gotta make it in."
"That's the thing, Bo," say Svrgyn. "This whole time I been secretly studying, and...and....
"I've been accepted to medical school," him say.
"Holy crap you gotta be kidding, Bo?"
"No," say Svrgyn. "It true."
"Ooooh, the amount of crap I'm gonna get for this," me say.
Then Bo Bindel think for a second. Me calm down.
"That's it," say Bo. "It's over. We gonna' dis-assem...dis-assem...dis-a.... Rah! Bo Bindel crew done!"
"What," ask Svrgyn. "You can't break up the gang on accounta' me!"
"It not on account of you, Svrgyn," say Bo. "But Troll Twins, them guys got a lot goin' on. The Troll p-rn and everything. 'Dem very talented Trolls and no gonna need Bo Bindel sooner or later. Them all I got left, so...."
"Oh, man, Bo," say Svrgyn. "This weighing big-time heavy on Svrgyn's heart now."
"We all proud of you, Svrgn. Wow. Bo Bindel friend Svrgyn first Troll to go to medical school. Heh.
"Hey. That check-washing heist was my last one," say Bo. "Me thinking about retiring any way."
"Where will you go," Svrgyn ask.
"You no worry about Bo Bindel. Momma Bindel's got this nice room in basement that Bo been eyeing for sooooooooome time."
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
November 10, 2005
Me drive and drive and drive. Finally me get to scrap yard with Baby Clock and we going outside.
"Go free, Baby Clock," me tell it. "Svrgyn going to medical school and them no like Clocks in hospitals.
"Bo Bindel bring you here cuz you got all this great stuff to play with. Look, Baby Clock. It miles and miles of broken helicoptors, uprooted power generators, overturned delivery trucks; acres and acres of all kindsa widgets and stuff. You gonna' be in heaven."
Me start walking back to car. Bo no wanna turn around cuz me know as soon as I do him gonna be....
Bah! There he is. Him following right behind Bo like a loyal little tin soldier with those sad puppy-dog eyes.
"You gonna stop looking at Bo like that, Baby Clock," me say. "Come on now. You gonna love it here.
"Alright. Get in the car."
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And so....
Bo Bindel and Baby Clock head down that long windey road, and off into the sunset....
Before returning for something shiney in the rearview mirror that they fight for all the way....
Down that long windey road, and off into the sunset.
THE END
Beovark: Hi, my name is Beovark.
Everyone: Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii, Beoooooovaaaaaaaark!
Beovark: ...and I'm a sugarholic.
WOOOHOOOO! *Clapclapclap*
Was five stars all the way, man.
(Some writing here too. http://www.justiceforce.com/forums/i...?showtopic=962 Apologies in advance to Xanatos; had to go for the funny!)
HAHA
Melo troll miss Bo Bindel.. not same big-time smash.. *sniff*
Global: @Pandemonia
We're sorry. Due to the lack of adequate marketing, user patience has died 90+ days ago. Please try again sans "Soon."
Just found this. Read the whole thing. Brilliant.
Rise from your grave!!
Really though I think others should be able to enjoy this like I did ....4 years ago.
Liberty server
Eldagore lvl 50 Inv/ss, co-founder of The Legion of Smash
3.5 servers of alts....I need help.
May the rawk be with you.
Arc #'s
107020 Uberbots!
93496 A Pawn in Time
Bo Bindel's Big-Time Diry
Bo Bindel
Resident Troll, Skyway City
November 8, 2005
Bo Bindel standing on top of Feng Shui's Super King China Buffet in a row along with Troll Twins, Baby Clock, and Svrgyn. We waiting for Tsoo to come try to collect protection money.
Me wishing Beovark was here cuz we could use all the help we could get, but him not. Here what happened.
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Troll Twins got this new swank lounge place all picked out where guys take their mistresses just before they go there to find other divorcees. Real fansy-shmansy crowd all line up along the bar. Troll Twins start noticing all those coats, purses and rich people hanging around the lounge stools.
So, me and Beovark stage a fight right by the bar. Everbody get scared and clear away from coats and stuff, while Baby Clock gonna hop and jump from coat to coat, purse to purse, pocket to pocket. It lookin' like we gonna make outta there with around $600.
Then Beovark start getting real with fight. Him go.
"You big-time blame Beovark for Junior disappearing," say Beovark.
"Well," me say. "You were suppose to watch him, dummy!"
"And," him go. "You make me take only half money for me kidnapping Indigo some stuff!"
"Calm down, Beovark," me say. "What you problem?"
"My problem is me suppose to get $80,000 for 1st place in Elvis contest and Bo Bindel no gonna let me keep it!
"You holding Beovark back," him say. "Beovark sick of it!"
"Fine," say Bo. "Why don't you just go work for you buddy, Freudel then if that how you feel about it!"
"Maybe I should," say Beovark.
"If that what you want to do then," Say Bo.
"Maybe Beovark do want to do 'dat," him say back.
"Well, then go do it then," I say. "See if Bo Bindel care you wanna go work for Bo Bindel's big-time rival-jerk Freudel!"
"Fine," him yell. "Then I will!"
"Fine!" yell Bo.
"Fine!" say Beovark.
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Oop. Gotta' go. Tsoo here.