Things Not to Say During Your CoX Interview

Originally Posted by Dark_Respite

Contract work, my friend. A once-a-year contract gig to write the COH April Fools' joke. You start work March 31st, and your contract ends April 2nd.



Any bets as to what this year's April Fools joke will be? We've had visual sound effects, text-based game, City of Sidekicks...

Michelle
aka
Samuraiko/Dark_Respite

Originally Posted by Skydance

"Yeah, about City of Heroes.. I have this awesome idea for the sequel.. first, there is the Planet, let's call it Zeist..."

Originally Posted by Steelclaw

1) Future Prophecies Discovered During My Casting of the Bits

2) Legal Justifications Alpha-Bits has for suing every cereal company whose cereal is in the shape of the letter "O".

3) Why the bits falling out randomly does NOT teach my child the proper order of the alphabet.

4) "Vowel movement" and other Alpha-Bits related puns.

5) Hydrogenating Coconut and Palm Kernel Oil for fun and profit

6) The Yellow Corn Flour Incident and other Post Prejudices.

7) "Manufactured on equipment that processes wheat" and other DUH moments from Post.

8) Possible reasons why the serving size should change according to the eater's age.

9) "My sodium increases when I add milk... who's salting the cows!?" and other nutritional conspiracy theories.

10) Ways to entice Vanna White into your vehicle using a trail of Alpha-Bits.

11) Reasons why the vowels should be marshmallow bits.

12) Definitions of the word Post that have NOTHING to do with cereal or even anything remotely edible.

13) Reasons why Alpha-Bits throws the ol' "don't play with your food" directive right out the window.

14) "My Alpha-Bits told me to do it" and other excuses for your tri-state murder spree.

15) Milk alternatives for your cereal bowl.

16) "You can't eat until you spell chrysanthemum" and other cruel pranks to pull during breakfast.

17) OCD and the dangers of pouring a bowl of Alpha-Bits.

18) "Dewey Decimal's Donuts" and other ideas for word-related breakfast treats.

19) How to use Alpha-Bits to spice up your next presentation to your boss at work!

20) The Alpha-Bits Font and other useless downloads.

21) How to restrain your urge to strangle Twisted Toon for challenging Steelclaw to make a list about Alpha-Bits.

22) The toy at the bottom of the box; harmless plastic or an effort to undermine family values?

23) The complete list of things you WILL NEVER be able to trade in your Post box tops for...

24) "My dog ate my suicide note" and other reasons why leaving messages with Alpha-Bits is ill-advised.

25) The Alpha-Bits / Alpha-Slot connection. (I had to make at least ONE that had something to do with CoH)

26) Reasons why your weird kid only eats the Q's.

27) "Dollars and Cents" and other cereal ideas for equal representation of the keyboard.

28) "My kid can only spell in upper case letters" and other complaints about the Alpha-Bits learning method.

29) "You must have dropped the box" and other Customer Service excuses about why the letters are out of order.

30) The complete list of words your parents will get angry with you for spelling in your cereal.

31) Proper stretching exercises to use before attempting to eliminate Steelclaw before he lists again.

32) "Times New Roman" and other Alpha-Bits off-shoot products.

33) "The Ten Thousand Monkeys and Ten Thousand Boxes of Alpha-Bits Shakespeare challenge" and other bad contest ideas from Post.

34) "Those? Oh, those are ... umm... punctuation... commas and periods..." and other bad explanations of the broken pieces at the bottom of the box.

35) "Morse Code Cereal" and other communication-based cereal concepts.

36) Reasons why a list of 20 Alpha-Bits related lists would have been much more reasonable than a list of 42...

37) "Why 8 boxes of Alpha-Bits does not make an Alpha-Byte" and other obscure nerd jokes.

38) "How many words can you make from your bowl?" and other ways to force your kids to eat soggy cereal.

39) "I could actually be PLAYING the game now" and other realizations that occur when you're this deep into a silly list.

40) "My box had no R's in it!!" and other crank call complaints with which to phone the Post Customer Service lines.

41) Cheek Lacerations and other reasons why pointy breakfast cereal isn't much fun.

42) "Omega Bits" and other apocalypse related breakfast cereal ideas.

Sheesh... why do I do this to myself? I'm going to go take a nap.

Originally Posted by Dark_Respite

Contract work, my friend. A once-a-year contract gig to write the COH April Fools' joke. You start work March 31st, and your contract ends April 2nd.



Any bets as to what this year's April Fools joke will be? We've had visual sound effects, text-based game, City of Sidekicks...

Michelle
aka
Samuraiko/Dark_Respite

Originally Posted by Grouchy_Ladybug

Putting goatees on every character and NPC in Praetoria.;-)

Originally Posted by Twisted Toon

I would comment that Steelclaw could come up with a list of possible April Fools jokes for CoX, but he would probably take that as a challenge...

Originally Posted by Dark_Respite

Contract work, my friend. A once-a-year contract gig to write the COH April Fools' joke. You start work March 31st, and your contract ends April 2nd.



Any bets as to what this year's April Fools joke will be? We've had visual sound effects, text-based game, City of Sidekicks...

Michelle
aka
Samuraiko/Dark_Respite

Originally Posted by Legree

Put The Wretch Strike Force in the game... as the next level of Incarnate content.

(yup, villains only)

Still my favourite piece of Steelclaw writing.