(Recluse chases after Stasis, and sings, to the tune of 'Planet Schmanet Janet'.)
I'll tell you once,
won't tell you twice,
Stasis get ready,
for a fight.
You can use fire/,
or use ice/,
but you'd better get ready,
for a fight.
I've given you builds,
enjoy the thri-ills,
dominator,
or corruptor,
or a stalker who can't be se-en.
(They emerge in the laboratory, Stasis runs towards the Spectator Mode panel.)
I suggest you slot,
using my advice,
Stasis get ready,
for a fight.
(FG and Alec arrive from the lift, and stand next to Stasis.)
My control panel,
will stop you no trouble.
Stasis: My feet, I can't move my feet!
Alec: My Nova! I can't use my six-slotted for damage Nova!
FG: It's as if we've been held on the spot!
Recluse: You are! So quake with fear you fools!
Stasis: We're trapped!
(Backing music still plays under conversation.)
Recluse: It's something you'll
get used to,
a mind-control fight,
can be quiet nice.
Alec: You won't find Issue 9 people quite the easy mark you imagine. This control panel, it is, I suppose, some kind of bandwidth-vibratory, physiomolecular lag device?
FG: You mean?
Alec: Yes FG. It's something we ourselves have been working on for quite some time. But it seems our friend here has found a way of perfecting it. A device which is capable of lagging out solid matter, and then rubber-banding it through space, and, who knows, perhaps even time itself!
Stasis: You mean he's going to send us to another planet?
(Recluse)
Planet.
Schmanet.
Alec.
Alec: Yes?
(Recluse)
I guess it's time now,
to come clean,
we're all from Issue,
one hundred and fifteen,
where we built a,
time machine.
Bridger: And then she cried out;
Stasis: Stooooooooop!
(FFM and Zortel enter the laboratory, and head over to the control panel. Tune of 'Hot Dog' comes in.)
(FG)
You're a fighter,
but you'd better not try to hurt her,
you dirty spider.
(Zortel pulls a lever, FG turns to stone.)
(Alec)
You're a sad excuse,
for a player,
Lord Recluse.
(Zortel pulls the lever again. Alec is turned to stone.)
(Stasis)
You're a wan..
(Zortel pulls the lever, Stasis turns to stone. Bushbaby arrives in the laboratory.)
Bushbaby: I can't take any more of this! First you spurn me for Aardy, then you cast him off like an old Issue 5 build for Xanthus. You chew people up and then you spit them out. You're like a Malta Sapper, you take-take-take! You drain others of their endurance and powers. Well, I've had enough. You've got to choose between me and Xanthus, so named because...well...I don't know why actually!
(Recluse nods. Zortel pulls the lever, and Bushbaby is turned to stone.)
Recluse: It's not easy having a good time. Even smiling makes my face ache.
(He walks back over to the control panel, next to FFM and Zortel.)
Recluse: My players turn on me. Xanthus is behaving just like Aardy did. Maybe I made a mistake splitting my infamy between the two of them?
(He looks up and sees Xanthus posing. He nods, and Xanthus turns to stone.)
Zortel: When will we return to Issue 115? I grow weary of this backwards server.
Recluse: Zortel, I am indeed grateful to both you and your team-mate FFM, you have both served me well. Loyalty such as yours must be rewarded, and you will discover, when the mood takes me, I can be quite generous.
Zortel: (Resentful tone of voice.) I ask for nothing, Lord Recluse.
Recluse: Then you shall receive it, in abundance! Come, we are ready for the Costume Competition!
(Recluse goes down the lift. FFM and Zortel look at each other and smile evilly.)
Not an update, I'm afraid. Due to having had a rather packed day due to work, and an evening of Hot Fuzz to look forward to, no new entry today. Tomorrow shall be the entirety of the Floor Show songs though. 
I vote that we force FG to sing all of these.
...I vote against.
[ QUOTE ]
...I vote against.
[/ QUOTE ]
Oh come on, it's not like it's slavery...well yes it is but the ends definitely justify the means.
(Switch to NCSoft office, with Bridger having stayed behind late. Rockjaw can be seen in the background grabbing his coat and leaving.)
Bridger: And so, by some extraordinary coincidence, fate it seems had decided that FG and Stasis should keep their appointment with their friend Alec. But it was to be in a situation which none of them could possibly have foreseen.
And just hours after planning builds for each other, FG and Stasis had both slotted for Forbidden Fruit, an IO set that isn't in game yet. This in itself was proof that their host was a man of little morals...and some persuasion.
What further slottings were they to be subjected to? And what of the Costume Competition that had been spoken of? What indeed? Had Recluse finally snapped and gone mad? From what had gone before, it was clear that this was to be no picnic.
(Switch to a stage mimicking Atlas Park, with curtain covering the background. Opening chords of 'The Floor Show' start playing.)
(Recluse hastily prepares everything, then goes to the side of the stage, and pulls a lever, to reveal, in order from left to right, Bushbaby, Xanthus, FG and Stasis, all dressed in Carnival of Shadows costumes. Recluse pulls another lever, Bushbaby is de-statued. Bushbaby begins to sing, to tune of 'Rose Tint My World'.)
It was a blast when it all began,
I was a regular teaming fan,
then Lord Recluse had a plan,
to build a PvP super-man.
The only reason he doesn't let me go,
is because I still slot SO's,
he controls my world,
keeps it a PvP game.
(Lever pulled, Xanthus is de-statued. Sings next verse.)
I'm only seven hours old,
already got some blasts and a hold,
and somebody should be told,
my accuracy can't be controlled.
Now the only thing I've come to trust,
is my Energy Blast and Power Thrust,
Recluse rules my world,
keeps it a PvP game.
(Lever pulled, FG is de-statued. Sings next verse.)
It's beyond me,
I can't slot properly,
I'll do good you see,
take this build away-ay-ay-ay,
what's this, let's see,
I forgot accuracy,
don't know what came over me,
have to start again.
(Lever pulled, Stasis is de-statued. Sings next verse.)
I feel released,
gank quota decreased,
my damage has been increased,
put others in a world of pain.
I've got new percentage,
without having to slot baggage,
life is just one stage,
in Recluse's PvP game.
(Fanfare starts to play, combined with Atlas Park theme tune. Curtains open to each side, revealing the statue of Atlas, with Recluse leaning against his leg.)
(Spoken verse by Recluse.)
Whatever happened to Hero 1,
stepped through that portal, with a Union Jack cape,
as I asked myself why,
I began to cry,
as I realised I wanted to fight just the sa-a-ame.
(He kicks a lever on stage, to reveal a sparring area.)
Get boosted up,
on Domination,
don't let them get ideas,
above their station,
give them nightmares,
beyond any measure,
slot Stamina,
so you'll go on forever.
Can't you just see it,
can't you just see-e-e-e it, oh.
(All enter the sparring area, and begin fighting in slow motion.)
All: Don't fear it, PvP it,
don't fear it, PvP it.
(All continue singing. Lever flips down, Alec is de-statued, and watches the ongoing fight in horror.)
Alec:
Heroes what!? We've got to get out of this trap,
before this all night-session saps our wills,
I've got to be strong,
and try to hang on,
or else my mind may well...SNAP!
(Lifts up trouser-leg to reveal Carnie stockings.)
And my life will be lived,
for the ki-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-ll.
FG:
It's beyond me,
I can't slot properly
Stasis:
God bless sniper powers.
(Music kicks in for 'Wild and Untamed Thing'. Recluse sings.)
My my my my,
my my my my,
I'm an unparalleled fighting king,
I slotted for Manticore's sting,
got a hit and my level goes ding,
you didn't get chance to do a thing,
but still the fighting goes on,
not gonna stop 'till the Heroes are gone,
Recluse rules this world,
and I'll keep it a PvP game.
(Others dance in synch with each other, and with music.)
I'm an unparalleled fighting king,
got enough infamy to buy three tech wings,
take down a Titan with a shot and sling,
you can't do anything but let me win,
but still the fighting goes on,
not gonna stop 'till the Heroes are gone,
Recluse rules this world,
and I'll keep it a PvP game.
(Doors to hall where stage is located burst open, to reveal Zortel in a long dress with a neckline, and FFM in full pirate-costume, with a modified Assault Rifle. He sings.)
Oh Lord Recluse,
you sad excuse,
for a Villains player,
your mission is a failure,
you've made everyone unhappy,
'cos your life's too PvP,
we return to Issue one-fifteen,
now feel my laser beam.
Recluse: Wait! I can explain!
Well, it's got me LMAO.
Nice work, Max. =D
Another apology for the delay here, the weekend was a bit busy for me, and I've got work today, so it's likely that the final pieces will be completed and put up tomorrow, hopefully.
(Motions to Bushbaby and Xanthus, who adjust the stage for him. Recluse sings, to tune of I'm Going Home Others join in for chorus section.)
On the day I started play
-Goodbye noob
Was all I had to say
-To Longbow troops
If I start again I'll say
-Team in, groups
And we can blast them all away-ay-ay
Cos I've seen, oh, men fall
Through the grip of my rule
And I realise
I'm going home
I'm going home
Everywhere it's been the same
-Feeling
Like I'm causing all the pain
-Leading
Black suit guys that look the same
-Stealing
Cards that give time for the ga-a-ame
Cos I've seen, oh, men fall
Through the grip of my rule
And I realise
I'm going home
I'm going home
Zortel: How sentimental.
FFM: And also presumptuous of you. You see, when I said 'we' were returning to Issue 115, I referred only to Zortel and myself.
(Recluse looks horrified. Others also look concerned.)
FFM: You are to remain here. In spirit, anwyay.
Recluse: But the ghost thing...that's in WoW
FFM:...how unlucky for you.
(FFM readies the modified Assault Rifle.)
Alec: Great heavens, it's got a laser attached!
FFM: Yes Alec. In Issue 67, the Assault Rifle got the fez-wearing dinosaur laser-beam power, and ironically, then became the most overpowered power in the game.
FG: You mean you're going to 'arrest' him? What's his crime?
Alec: You saw what happened to Aardy. The community must be protected.
FFM: Exactly, Alec. Now Lord Recluse, your time has come. Say goodbye to all...this, and hello, to a SINGLE PLAYER GAME OF THE ELDER SCROLLS IV: OBLIVION!
(Recluse gasps and staggers backwards.)
Bushbaby: No! (She runs in front, and is hit by the laser. Her body begins to fade away as the 30-second timer appears above her head.)
(Recluse grasps at the stage curtains, and tries to climb them, like Spiderman, but not, for legal reasons. FFM shoots him, and he falls to the floor, with the stage equipment falling on top of him.)
Xanthus: Ruuuugh!
(Xanthus picks up Recluse, and begins climbing up the statue of Atlas, being shot at repeatedly, with emotional music played in background as he does so. Eventually, the statue collapses, and he falls to his doom, and the 30-second timer starts on them both.)
Alec: Good lord.
FFM: Yes.
Stasis: You killed them!
Zortel: I thought you liked them. They side-kicked you.
FFM: They never side-kicked me!
Alec: You did right.
FFM: A decision had to be made.
Alec: You're OK by me.
FFM: I'm sorry about your server host.
Alec: Yes, well. I'm sure someone else will pay for one.
FFM: You must leave now Alec, while it's still possible. We are about to beam this entire building back to Issue 115, as the developers redecorated it after the Rikti War, and we prefer it how it looks now.
(FG, Stasis and Alec run for the exit.)
FFM: Our noble mission is almost complete, my duo-partner. Soon, we will return to the giant robot and dinosaur infested streets of our 'futuristic' Issue.
Zortel: Ah, sweet issue 115. To team, and blast again, to take that unwanted jump to the left...
FFM: And the rubber-banding that really drives you insane.
Zortel: And our Issue will do the Lag Warp again!
(Switch to an outside view, where FG, Stasis and Alec have just left City Hall. There is a loud explosion, and City Hall launches into the sky, and out of view.)
(Song, 'Super Heroes'.)
FG:
I slot a lot,
God knows I've tried,
I've slotted Health and even Hide,
But all I know is when I fight,
-I'm bleeding
Stasis:
And super heroes,
Come to fight,
They come by speed,
They come by flight,
If they think they,
Can win, they must be,
-Dreaming
-Ahh, ahh,
-ahh, ahh,
-ahh, ahh,
-ahhhhhh
(Camera shot begins to spin, and blurs, before refocusing on a spinning coffee cup Bridger has knocked over.)
Bridger: (Spoken Verse.)
And crawling,
on the planet's face,
some insects,
called the human race,
lost in time,
and lost in space.
(He gets up and heads for the door.)
And good builds.
(He turns the lights out, and walks out the door. Screen fades to black for credits.)
Rikti spaceship,
in Atlas Park,
Lo-ord Recluse,
was off the mark,
FG and Stasis,
are likely to sue,
the servants gone to,
a future issue.
Oh-oh-oh-oh-ohhh,
at the late night, nothing on TV, hero show,
it's the credits you'd better go,
oh-oh-oh-ohhhhh,
from the late night, nothing on TV, hero show.
Right, that's all over and finished. I hope most people reading it enjoyed it, and weren't too fussed I had to add a few syllables here and there to make things fit in. 
I may attempt something else like this in future, so if anyone can think of a well-known christmas film with songs in, let me know by PM, and I'll consider it over the next few months. 
*applause.....rapturous applause*
Dude, that was comedy gold and I bow before the master
We built this city on Rock and Roll!
I totally ROCK!
/em Wields the Assault Rifle with the fez-wearing dinosaur laser-beam power
Come get some!
Awesome job Max. This has GOT to win a prize!
@FloatingFatMan
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Bravo, bravo! Encore!!
Fantastic job _Max_, the original will never be the same again.
[B]Order of the Cruciform/Crucified Swords[/B] - [B]Defiant[/B]
50's - Tridento (claws/invul scrapper), Robo Medic MkIV (empath/rad defender), Entrino (dark/dark defender) & Captain Wombat (thugs/traps mastermind)
[I]@EU-Cambo[/I]
Great work, _Max_ Not just because I'm Magenta! You did a great job of converting it!
Thanks for all the support guys and girls, it was a hard toil at times, and I probably would have given up at one point if it hadn't been for the fans.
Now, all that's left is to hope that nobody posts anything fantastically creative for the rest of June.
This is truly brilliant, Max .
�How do I like my MMOs? I like them the way Paragon Studios used to make them.� - a fitting tribute from kiasa.org
EU, Union mostly.
Wow! Im abit late :P. But i must say im a huge fan of Rocky Horror, seen the lives shows, movies, documentaries; you name it! I must say i loved this! Fantastic translation of 'our CoX' terms and themes to the RHPS! I mean amazing well done!
An idea for another musical CoX project, maybe the likes of Little Shop Of Horrors! Imagine it! The Plant Dom, That weird dentist guy. . . (A failed Doctor so your looking at a /Empth!).
Good luck with any future stuff you do because this was just amazing
"Now Lord Recluse, your time has come. Say goodbye to all...this, and hello, to a SINGLE PLAYER GAME OF THE ELDER SCROLLS IV: OBLIVION!"
Hahahahaha i you are the king that is very good.
Thanks
(Switch to dining-room scene. Alec, FG, Stasis, Recluse, Xanthus and Bushbaby are sat at the table. FFM and Zortel bring out a serving trolley, and add slabs of meat to everyone's plates, and sloppily add wine to the glasses, before heading back to the front of the table, where Recluse stands up to make a toast.)
Recluse: To non-subscribing friends.
All: To non-subscribing friends.
Alec: We came here to discuss Aardy.
Bushbaby: Aardy!
(Recluse scowls at her, and she settles back down.)
Recluse: That's a rather tender subject. Though I think, he got the point. Or rather, I did.
Bushbaby: Excuse me.
(She leaves the room and is heard screaming down the corridor.)
Alec: I knew he was in with a bad crowd. But this is worse than I imagined...time-travellers!
FG & Stasis: Alec!
Recluse: Go on DOCTOR Alec, or should I say, Doctor Who? *chuckles*
(Alec begins to sing, to the tune of 'Eddie's Teddy.')
From the day he was rolled,
he hated all trolls,
he tried to be blaster,
but he always died,
so to avoid the pain,
he rolled an Ice Tank,
what a shame,
he chose Prestige Power Slide.
And from that day on,
everything just went completely wrong,
though he found a build that he liked,
that hit things with a 'thunk',
(Bridger)his PC always crashed with a clunk,
but he said the problem was server-siiiiide.
When Aardy kicked you,
off his private CS server,
you knew it was a bad thing you did,
when he threatened your player,
with being set on fire,
(Recluse)what a guy,
(Stasis)makes you cry,
(Alec)and Hidden did.
(Switch to Bushbaby in her room, with a large poster of Aardy.)
Everybody owned him,
but I really, really loved him,
I said I'm on your team don't shoot me,
so he changed sv_gravity,
he had it binded to an,
easy reachable key.
(Switch back to Alec unfolding a scrap of paper.)
Alec: Making him warn me,
in a note,
which reads...
All: What's it say, what's it say, what's it say?
Aardy: If you read this then I'm dead,
these Ice Tanks are a pain in the neck,
stop Recluse's evil deeds.
(Back to Alec.)
When Aardy kicked you,
off his private CS server,
you knew it was a bad thing you did,
when he threatened your player,
with being set on fire,
(Recluse)what a guy,
(Stasis)makes you cry,
(Alec)and Hidden did.
When Aardy kicked you,
off his private CS server,
you knew it was a bad thing you did,
when he threatened your player,
with being set on fire,
(Slow down tempo.)
(Recluse)what a guy,
-Woah, woah, woah
(Stasis)makes you cry,
-Hey, hey, hey
(Alec)and I di-i-i-i-id.
(Recluse lifts the tablecloth off of the table, to reveal hundreds of packs of Bird's Eye 100% pork burgers.)
FG: Nooooo! I've eaten non-kosher food!
(Stasis screams and stands close to Xanthus for RA. Recluse looks disgusted at this, and begins chasing after Stasis. FG and Alec follow in pursuit, but argue over map directions and end up heading towards the lab.)
FFM & Zortel: Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Zortel: *continues laughing*
FFM: Shut up!