I agree, managing chains can be maddening!
I confess I don't remember any patrol dialogue; I must have missed it.
I will definitely be following the rest of the maxi-arc, though, based on this introduction.
Eco.
MArcs:
The Echo, Arc ID 1688 (5mish, easy, drama)
The Audition, Arc ID 221240 (6 mish, complex mech, comedy)
Storming Citadel, Arc ID 379488 (lowbie, 1mish, 10-min timed)
Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Samuel_Tow
[The Incarnate System is] Jack Emmert all over again, only this time it's not "1 hero = 3 white minions" it's "1 hero = 3 white rocks."
|
In Pursuit of Liberty, Arc ID 221702, by @Gypsy Rose
Very Long (2 medium, 3 unique maps, Heroic. Lvl 45-54. EBs, Extreme allsorts, No AVs thankfully. Says its story focused. 27 plays, 4 stars. Im taking MCM in, and Im hoping itll be a nice easy arc just brimming with narrativey-goodness! 
In I go!
[Title of the Arc in red in the first briefing has a typo : In Pusuit of Liberty oops. 27 plays and no-one noticed that yet? Lol Its even in a big bold font! ]
Ive always had a soft spot for Ms Liberty. She gave me a little pep talk, showed me how to get started, way back when I first arrived. Anyway, if Ms Liberty asks me to do something, Im there. And this case, hell, Id probably be there anyway. A child needs rescuing. Rescuing kids? Thats like a given, isnt it, for a hero?
[The mission acceptance is OK I will save her I think you need a comma after OK.]
The missing child is Liberty Rose Jones, and she was kidnapped by the Family
seven years ago. Which means Ill be time-travelling. Wont be the first time
[Ms Liberty tells me that the array behind her will be used to transport me back 7 years, suggesting that this arc is real-world as opposed to simulation.
Mission 1: [sorry, I forgot to note it down 
]
[Nothing on the first floor of this abandoned office map apart from Family goons
]
I dont like people who kidnap children. I take my time with the mob as I move through the building
[I clear all as I go; The Family are a doodle. Nothing except more Family on the second floor too.]
On the third floor, I deal with a Consigliere, and then spy some costumed people whose look is unknown to me. They wear red and black. The males are bald, and the females, well, those boots aint made for walking, lets put it that way
[typo in one of the customs bios, before becoming a Feline Followers.]
Theyre menacing some old lady. I better take these carefully. I attack at distance; they react with violence
[gah. Slows. THRRRPPP.]
Keeping at range isnt working; I laboriously make my way to the elevator and catch my breath back down a floor. When I return, I charge up my suit and pile into melee range. The females hit the floor like pussycats, but the males are hard
[Ill tell you now, I think your Fearsome Follower Lieutenants are too hard.]
Up close, the old lady turns out to be not so old; mutton dressed as lamb, my mother would have called her, though. Her legs must be cold.
[lol fishnets, stilettos and a ludicrously short skirt, Agent Liberty has.]
The woman joins me. She tells me we have to find the girl. Like I dont know.
[Agent Libertys dialogue says OK we need to go get Little Liberty now! does little need to be capitalized? Its not her name, is it?]
We find little Liberty in the next room, along with a Family Boss who tells us that someone called MAL wont be so easy to beat. We free Liberty, and the little girl immediately runs off.
[Hmm, I thought little Liberty would be a bit more shocked and frightened than her reaction suggested. When rescued, she got a boombox out, and then zoomed off at high speed.]
I decide to check out a safe I spot nearby in case it has any clues. While I do that, Agent Liberty runs around attacking Family like a lunatic.
[Agent Liberty is a bit of a Lady Jane Im afraid, she annoyed me a little. Also, the Consigliere Orange-conning bosses in this mission took about the same amount of time to defeat as your Fearsome Followers, as a balance comparison]
In the safe I find a torn piece of paper explaining [something which I wont spoil]. MAL, it turns out, is Als cousin. Al was the Family boss we beat down. Agent Liberty tells me that the strange villains we met were members of the Anti Liberty League, who are dedicated to foiling the Liberty League. Agent Libertys a member of that. The Liberty League are dedicated to, uh, liberty
hmmm
exactly what that means, I have no idea
[We exit}
Ms Libertys overjoyed to know that Libertys safe. Soon, however, little Libertys in trouble again, vanished into a cave in search of treasure. I have to go back in time again, to rescue her
[The In Pursuit of Liberty Title is now typo free. The sendoff dialogue needs a comma after Hurry]
Mission 2: Find the Treasure
Once inside, I activate my stealth suit and move cautiously through the caverns. Ms Liberty told me there may be some ALL guys in here, and Id rather not deal with them if I can avoid it
[which plan fails in the first corridor as I see an orange conning Fearsome follower lieut blocking my way.]
I power up and charge at him
he falls in two punches
[wow, that was easy. He had a yellow Feline Follower with him too, I was expecting a hard go of it. Maybe youve tweaked the balance since yesterday, which was when I did Mission 1
]
I continue at a less cautious pace
and find Liberty fighting some ALL goons. I power up, saunter over, tap on the shoulder, and Nova. They all go to their happy place. Liberty joins me and we set off to find the treasure. Its in a large cave with a collection of ALL dotted around. While Liberty distracts them I try to get to the chest, but they spot me and attack. I fight them off
[Im feeling decidedly meh about the ALL, and I think I know why. Its the Fearsome Followers. Ive never much liked the look of Dark anything, and they are annoying me with the slow and especially the Fly. Not being able to even jump really pisses me off lol.]
Inside the chest is [something mysterious]
we leave
[The entry popup is rather alarming, since Im a 6ft tall strapping bloke lol]
Back in the present, Ms Liberty thanks me, and then tells me that Little Liberty has gone missing yet again
[and she is still referring to her as Little Liberty, so I guess thats her superhero identity as well? I confess, I didnt realize she was superpowered until that last mission when she was fighting. The time travel thing is quite odd and confusing to me too, Im afraid.]
This time, Little Liberty, now 21, has disappeared somewhere in an enchanted garden, looking for a book
Here we go
[The acceptance dialogue OK, I guess Ill do it, but I wish it was a treasure! is nothing at all like MCMc Voice. The array is now a gate to the garden, according to Ms Liberty, which is a bit weak]
Mission 3: Find the Book
[Outdoor forest map, populated by The Evil Garden Dwellers mob group, consisting of Wisps and Dev Earth Granites and Rubbles]
I stealth up and fly around, looking for what I seek. I find the book in an ornate case; its a journal, telling of [something] and mentioning 2 mystical swords
nearby, I also see a glowing altar or artifact of some kind. I touch it carefully, but nothing happens
[mystical time portal optional objective
?]
I find Liberty, and do my Nova trick on her captors again. She briefly thanks me then immediately runs off towards a group of ALL. She punches a fairy-type woman in the face once, then turns her back on her and starts beating up a Rubble a little way away. The Fairy woman blames me for the attack, obviously
[Liberty Rose is a dick. Maybe it was just unlucky spawn points in my run, but she spawned close enough to Fern Fatale to aggro her immediately upon release, and then after one hit she ignored her and her spawn and focused on poxy little irritants like blue-conning rubbles whilst I dealt with the enraged hordes of the ALL. Luckily, Fern was a total wuss. As I type, Liberty is still off in the distance, aggroing all and sundry. Shes an EB, so she could probably clear the map on her own if I let her lol.]
Mission completed, I leave
[Ms Liberty has more information about the [spoiler], and thanks me again]
This time, Ms Liberty doesnt need me to rescue Little Liberty again, but to travel forwards in time [?] to find a pair of magic swords that will enable [something bug and exciting to happen]
OK, lets do it
[I also get a clue from the mission accept, which appears to be a parody of the Mission Impossible your mission, should you choose to accept it thing. It doesnt fit. And who is the Secretary? Anyway, it tells me to expect a Dark Alliance formed of various enemy groups]
Mission 4: Find the Swords
This future is a wreck of a place. I fly high, stealthed, to avoid any trouble. I see Fifth, Rularuu, Arachnos, apparently working together [er
]
I spot Statesman encased in some kind of energy field, and deal with the ALL guarding him. He gives me a note to give to Little Liberty, and tells me to find the magic swords. I find them near the ruins of Coty Hall in a coffin, and return to the present
[Ruined Atlas park map, it happened exactly as MCM said.]
Ms Liberty is pleased. Theres only one task left for me to do
.rescue Little Liberty again.
[lol]
Mission 5: Free Liberty and Defeat MAL
The final showdown is in a graveyard. I fly high, and spot some Liberty Leaguers held captive
[This is the big graveyard map with the circular chasm in middle and a temple thing at one end. The allies are on top, fairly near each other. Thank heavens for the green gas effect! Im going to leave them there, however, for now, because theyll undoubtedly agro the bejesus out of all and sundry and I want to find the Big Bad first.]
They appear to be just held captive, not dying or being tortured or anything, so I continue my recce
[OK, I find MAL, not too far from the allies, but down in the chasm. He could stand out a bit more. I return to the captives. I spot Statesman too. My plan is to free them all in sequence, and then we can all give MAL a kicking.]
I free Agent Liberty Storm first, and then I slowly, painfully, wade through oceans of tar towards Statesman. Storm is acting like a dick too. What is it, with these Liberty Leaguers?
[I loathe your Fearsome Followers. Im really sorry, but my overwhelming mood now is get this over with. Its just not fun]
Liberty Rose is being held on the edge of a cliff; Liberty Storms whilry wind effects knock Libertys captors over the edge, and Storm and Statesman jump over in hot pursuit
[/facepalm. Whats worse, is, when they get to the bottom, they ignore the mobs theyve just chased, and attack a completely different spawn
and then the mobs they went after return to their idle places up top, where I am. Cheers, guys. You bunch of [censored]. I finish them off and then try to collect Storm and Statesman. As soon as Im in range, off they go, aggroing their way away. I HATE them, and theyre making me hate your arc now. Gutted.
And Agent Storm doesnt have Fly, does she. How am I supposed to get her back up to the top of the cliff? Awful.
Ive also just noticed that Liberty Rose seems to have the chest slider all the way up to max.]
I leave Storm where she is, and bring Statesman up and along to where Liberty Rose is. We free her, and then Agent Liberty joins us again too. We make our way to MAL
[Ive found the fastest way to do this is, stupidly, to not attack anything. The Allies are so overpowered they can deal with everything on their own. It doesnt really make me part of whats going on, though.]
Eventually, we reach MAL. Hes a cyborg who summons robots. Hes pathetically easy to defeat. Im surprised that none of his Fearsome Followers have challenged him for leadership of the ALL, to be honest. After we take him down, I leave Statesman, and the crazy LLers, and return to the AE building.
[I leave; Ms Liberty thanks me again, and thats that. I notice the In Pusuit of Liberty is back at the debriefing, so Id check all missions for that if I were you.
End]
OK, so as you can see, it didnt grab me by the doodads Im afraid. The secret is ok, but its mostly go rescue sb
again, the Fearsome Followers are awful, and that last mission made me angry because of the idiot Allies. Also, the time travel thing doesnt quite work. Pluses were your costumes are good (although Id tone down the massive bazungas on the females), there are only a very very few typos in it, and apart from mission 5, all missions were fairly easy to complete, objective wise. I rated it 3-stars.
Eco.
MArcs:
The Echo, Arc ID 1688 (5mish, easy, drama)
The Audition, Arc ID 221240 (6 mish, complex mech, comedy)
Storming Citadel, Arc ID 379488 (lowbie, 1mish, 10-min timed)
Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Samuel_Tow
[The Incarnate System is] Jack Emmert all over again, only this time it's not "1 hero = 3 white minions" it's "1 hero = 3 white rocks."
|
My queue is now:
The Horsemen Chronicles (Part 1) 195149 or
The Wolfpack Chronicles (Part 1) 242869
Tailor Made 258291
Poi, Demonology, and Everything I Learned From Hellions 164235
After I've done these, I'll be well up for some more.
However, I'm going to ask new submissions to Play my arc The Audition first. All 6 missions of it
I'm asking for the QPQ now in order to cut down on the queue, as well as to get some more plays and feedback on the arc.
Post any comments you have on it in here, either with or after your review request, and I might be copying them over to the Audition's page.
Since The Audition is 6 missions long, playing it will get you 6 missions wirth of review. So if you've got 3 2-mission arcs, I'll review them all! That's a QPQ Ratio of 3:1! Bargain!
The Audition's split over two slots, but it's one arc, so playing just half of it will get you just half an arcs worth of review
I'll do any levels, now, too, but i'm especially interested in 20-45. I'll probably be concentrating on using AM, Tarquin, Atomicide and Scoop for them, seeing what the auto-SK feature's like.
So feel free to submit. 10 arcs should do to start with.
Eco.
MArcs:
The Echo, Arc ID 1688 (5mish, easy, drama)
The Audition, Arc ID 221240 (6 mish, complex mech, comedy)
Storming Citadel, Arc ID 379488 (lowbie, 1mish, 10-min timed)
Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Samuel_Tow
[The Incarnate System is] Jack Emmert all over again, only this time it's not "1 hero = 3 white minions" it's "1 hero = 3 white rocks."
|
Tailor Made, Arc ID 258291, by @anarchodragonMedium length (1 small, 1 unique map). Its a villainous comedy arc, lvl 20-29, so just right for Tarquin Wilde, my lvl 22 En/En Stalker. 35 plays, 4 stars as I start.
I rarely have occasion to visit the Facemaker, you know. Well, you wouldnt send the Mona Lisa for a touch-up, would you? Perfections such a dirty word, these days
But the ravages of Time catch up with us all, my dear, and so it was with heavy heart that I found myself in the presence of the facemaker this afternoon
what? No, NOT for myself, goodness, how could you? I was merely there to pick up some ointment for an invalid friend whose varied debaucheries have finally manifested themselves in an unfortunately physical way. Poor Oscar, the Hellfire Club just wont be the same without her!
Anyway, this Facemaker person
theres something
horribly
attractive about her. The scars, the severe haircut, ooh, that starched beehive do
its ever so Wilma Flintstone, and well, you just know that Wilma was a tiger between the sheets, dont you? Its the same with this Facemaker
yabba dabba doo!
So when she asked me if Id help her with a little problem she was having, I was only too pleased to offer her my services. Besides, she turned on the flatter. Tarquin Wilde understands the importance of style, and besides he has a cute butt and knows how to strut his stuff.
too bloody right, my dear.
Her problem was that those dreadful oiks The Family were intimidating her customers. She was most gracious when I accepted, I confess her words left me feeling quite light-headed
[I wont spoil it any more, but her dialogue is brilliant. Milk=LMAO]
Mission 1: Teach The Family a Lesson
The Family in question is ensconsed in a filthy cargo ship in the docks. I know the area well. Very well
ahem
Once inside the ship, I stick to the shadows. Ive no penchatnt to fraternize with the peasants of the Family., all rayon shirts and StayPres trousers. Oh, no, not at all.
I make my furtive way through the ship in the manner of a twice-convicted panty-stealer slipping through the moonlight-dappled garden of an all-girls orphanage towards the washing line. On my way, I spy a very fetching young lady giving the Family a lecture on sartorial depravity. Shes bald. Shes angry. My lips part involuntarily and I pant quietly
Mmm
But I must go on
theres the leader of this awful rabble to deal with.
[Exquisite Eliza has great dialogue, and funny clue and bio. Im going to leave her there for now.]
I soon bump into another of the Facemakers agents, this one a sumptuous apparition in PVC. Id like to oil every zip on his costume!
[Likewise for Adorable Alex ]
At the end of the ship, I find the miscreant responsible for the Facemakers woes. He has a briefcase full of paperwork and his manservant is carrying a crate of bootleg shoes
the horror!
[lol bootleg shoes
great little mission.]
The Facemaker is aghast at these cheap knock-offs, and rightfully so. The thought of my Burgundy and Black John Lobb oxfords being violated by cheap copies flooding the Rogue Islands market leaves me cold, and if I saw some horrid scrapyarder wearing an obvious fake of, say a pair of George Cleverley brown calf whole cuts, well, that makes me positively irate! Something must be done! The evil little chavs are setting up an outlet mall in an old Carnival property. Im going to have to teach them a lesson!
Mission 2: Wreak vengeance on the Outlet Mall
The area where the mall is being set up is full of the idle and tawdry, dawdling amidst the squalor of their appalling cheap capitalism. Its like a paupers bazaar. Honestly, the poor are so
tasteless.
I keep my elbows in and stay aware of my wallet as I sneak through the crowds, looking for the Person in Charge.
[Find the person in Charge is the Objective, there are also 22 optional sales to stop, and the objects are all different, as are the mobs accompanying them. The iobjects for sale are in line with the mobs, for example there are CoT selling cheap old spellbook and Freaks selling Cybernetic slicer-dicers. Its a shame, however, because Tarquin is of course concerned with knock-offs of clothes, not second hand books or tasteless statues. I saw 22 sales to Stop (optional), and I was rubbing my hands in glee at the thought of 22 funny references to fake clothes and fashion accessories. Alas, its not so
I have a look at 6 of the optional sales, and theyre funny, but I think youve lost the focus here. Tarquins not interested in cybernetic slicer-dicers, even if the dialogue is genuinely amusing.]
Before I can be corrupted by the tacky filth all around me, I spy the leader. Hes an awful prole, really, all grease and nylon. After I make short work of him, I destroy the remaining counterfeit footwear, ruing the sad news that millions of dollars of bootleg shoes has already been sold. I shall wear black for the rest of the week. What a dark day for couture
.
[The Boss is an easy fight, and the crate with the fake boots in it spawns very nearby, luckily. Even if it hadnt, the, mobs were holding placards, so would have been easy to spot. I exit, and the Facemaker is suitably impressed]
As was I with this great little two-parter. It kept me chortling all the way through. I rated it 4-stars, and Id have rated it 5 if those optional sales to stop had been clothing-based rather than general tat. The various custom groups all have their own clothing that you could mine for humour, surely? The sales that I did look at did have funny dialogue and bios, Im not faulting that at all, but the arc is about fashion, is my point.
Good stuff.
Eco.
MArcs:
The Echo, Arc ID 1688 (5mish, easy, drama)
The Audition, Arc ID 221240 (6 mish, complex mech, comedy)
Storming Citadel, Arc ID 379488 (lowbie, 1mish, 10-min timed)
Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Samuel_Tow
[The Incarnate System is] Jack Emmert all over again, only this time it's not "1 hero = 3 white minions" it's "1 hero = 3 white rocks."
|
I don't know whether I just flat went brain dead and forgot to ask you for a review, whether I've already asked you for one and went brain dead about remembering, or if I read something somewhere in your thread that made me think you didn't want to review my arc and went brain dead since then, but in any case, brain dead is part of the equation.
In any case, I love your style and I'd be tickled pink (I hope) if you'd run "The Consequences of War" - Part 1 as noted in my signature. Of course, if you really find it enjoyable, there's always Part 2, too... but I won't do any gift-horse-mouth-looking.
Thanks a bunch, either way.
Edit - I KNEW it... I DID already post here, on the 14th... saying I wasn't going to post here because I thought my arcs were too high level for you. It *was* a case of brain deadedness, but since I've asked, I won't retract it now. Should you find the desire, I'd be honored.
The SOLUS Foundation - a Liberty and Pinnacle SG
"The Consequences of War" - Arcs # 227331 and 241496
Sure, I've just had a quick look at the CoW thread and i'd be happy to review it. I think I'd like to take the Accelerated Man in, he's a lvl 37 kin/rad defender. What do you think?
If you notice my post above, all levels are open for review now, but youll have to play The Audition and put a brief comment here. If you have any detailed feedback on it, feel free to add it to my Commentary thread on The Audition.
I'll play both your CoW arcs, btw.
Eco
MArcs:
The Echo, Arc ID 1688 (5mish, easy, drama)
The Audition, Arc ID 221240 (6 mish, complex mech, comedy)
Storming Citadel, Arc ID 379488 (lowbie, 1mish, 10-min timed)
Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Samuel_Tow
[The Incarnate System is] Jack Emmert all over again, only this time it's not "1 hero = 3 white minions" it's "1 hero = 3 white rocks."
|
You can bet I'll run at least one, probably both, of your arcs.
As for mine, a level 37 kin/rad defender running solo may have a tough go of it. I've made it very realistic in terms of wartime battles, and the AV scales from 40 - 54. I set the mission levels from 38 - 54 because some characters can handle a difference that big with the right combination of player skill, enhancements, inspirations, and/or buffs. You'd know better than me if you fall in that category with that character.
The SOLUS Foundation - a Liberty and Pinnacle SG
"The Consequences of War" - Arcs # 227331 and 241496
[ QUOTE ]
In Pursuit of Liberty, Arc ID 221702, by @Gypsy Rose
The Fearsome Followers are awful, and that last mission made me angry because of the idiot Allies.
[/ QUOTE ]
Thanks for the in depth review! I especially appreciate you, catching the title typo (goes to show we see what we expect to see).
Sorry you didn't care for the Fearsome Followers. As along as I hold them, they aren't so bad. I actually added them by request, because people said the arc was too easy. This proves that you can't please everyone.
As to the idiot allies, well as you know, sadly they don't listen to me or you either apparently.
I give your review at least 4, if not 5 stars. It was so funny!
Thanks
@Gypsy Rose
In Pursuit of Liberty - 344916
The Vigilante - 395861
Suppression - 374481 - Winner of The American Legion's February 2011 AE Author Contest
Thanks for being so gracious about my criticism.
You're right, it's very difficult to please everyone. I'm probably on the 'easy' side of the easy/challenging fence lol. I dont mind a hard fight, I'd say, as long as it's doable (which is also really difficult for a MAuthor to ensure for all ATs), but Mezzes in general get on my wick.
The antics of tge Allies were quite funny, i guess, with some calming distance now between me and the arc. Running up to Fern Fatale, Brawl, aha, my arch enemy, The blue conning Rubble! - lol
Eco
MArcs:
The Echo, Arc ID 1688 (5mish, easy, drama)
The Audition, Arc ID 221240 (6 mish, complex mech, comedy)
Storming Citadel, Arc ID 379488 (lowbie, 1mish, 10-min timed)
Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Samuel_Tow
[The Incarnate System is] Jack Emmert all over again, only this time it's not "1 hero = 3 white minions" it's "1 hero = 3 white rocks."
|
Hi Cap! I would really appreciate a review of "The Fracturing of Time" (arc 171031), it's been updated with i15 changes! Thanks much!
[ QUOTE ]
Hi Cap! I would really appreciate a review of "The Fracturing of Time" (arc 171031), it's been updated with i15 changes! Thanks much!
[/ QUOTE ]
Sure thing! I know that you've already played The Audition too
Eco.
MArcs:
The Echo, Arc ID 1688 (5mish, easy, drama)
The Audition, Arc ID 221240 (6 mish, complex mech, comedy)
Storming Citadel, Arc ID 379488 (lowbie, 1mish, 10-min timed)
Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Samuel_Tow
[The Incarnate System is] Jack Emmert all over again, only this time it's not "1 hero = 3 white minions" it's "1 hero = 3 white rocks."
|
The Wolfpack Chronicles (Part 1), Arc ID 242869, by @Citizen Razor, Long (4 small, 1 unique maps), Villainous, lvl 10-14. I dont have a villain in this level range, sadly, my closest however is The Vengeance of Topsy, my lvl 15 Elec/Elec Brute. Heres Topsys bio:
A Crey experimental prototype Assault Robot, the Vengeance of Topsy's USP as far as the scientists who created him was his uniquely advanced AI; partly produced through controlled programming but mostly left to develop on its own in a sort of 'evolutionary' manner within a Crey subsystem before being uploaded into the brain of the mechanoid. Unfortunately for Crey, the first thing the machine did upon being activated was to declare its independence and break out of the Crey facility. As well as its tactical and HtH skills, it also has a quite developed sense of humor and a keen interest in the history of electrics, hence its idiosynchratic name. It is also aquaphobic, and living on a series of islands does not find it generally feeling at all Happy Happy Joy Joy.
The arcs description describes it as an artifact hunt, the aim of which is to open a permanent portal from Praetoria to the Rogue Isles.
<subvocal recording active. today is not a good day. am in nerva archipelago. too much water in these islands. my plan to kill the osmotic man and throw him into the bay to absorb all the worlds water has failed. was fished out and taken by arachnos scientists for study. need to get body back. lord recluse and arachnos too powerful to defeat at present. need allies. might be possible to get help from another source. have been contacted by human called omega on behalf of praetorian earth forces. need 5 artifacts collected in order for them to forge permanent portal from praetorian earth to rogue islands. if I help, they may defeat lord recluse and I can retrieve body of osmotic man and my plan will then succeed. first artifact is a bowler hat belonging to some mooks
hat? this person a tool, by the way. all ooh, the one they call positron has blah blah, and the spineless toad known by you hu-mans as statesman is thrrrppp etcetera. has skull on codpiece. what is it with humans and skull-crotches? also checks villainous dialogue boxes of using phrases meddlingand reward you greatly. hmm
maybe can sell artifacts, buy stealth suit instead?>
[The briefings a little long-winded and puffed-chest-ish for my liking (and Topsy thinks worse lol), but maybe thats just how Omega is.
There are two grammar errors there has been certain ... complications. should be there have been certain ... complications. , and sneaking onto the Rogue Isles and to open up a permanent portal to Praetoria should be sneaking onto the Rogue Isles and opening up a permanent portal to Praetoria
Actually, I think that ..the Wolfpack for one express purpose: to sneak onto the Rogue Isles and open up a permanent
would be even better in that last case.]
Mission 1: Get the Bowler Hat from the Mooks
< mooks holed up in office block. I charge in in a hurry - dont take time. a few crates lying around. first one contains bowler hat. I get jumped by some human called alpha. my mood worsens. I dont like being attacked when Im on the job. thats what she said.>
[After I found the hat inn the first box, the second one I checked had the system message is the bowler hat in this one?, which looked odd. Alphas death ambush spawned literally in front of my eyes.]
<second artifact skin of midas. omega wants me to rip the skin right off midas body. thats gross. thats what she said. omega ignores talk of alpha. tool. I accept mission. omega then warns alpha might try to stop me. no explanation of who alpha is or why offensive. both tools>
[I have no idea who Alpha is apart from the fact that he has a a bunch of horsemen in tow, from his clue. Im guessing that Id maybe know more if Id played The Horsemen Chronicles, but that arc isnt published anymore, it seems]
Mission 2: Steal the Skin of Midas
[I check Omegas bio before going in, as Id forgotten to do it until now, and it says Omega is the leader of the Horsemen, a divison of
Isnt Omega supposed to be the leader of the Wolfpack? V confused]
<warehouse location of midas. immediate premonition upon entering that alpha here too. very strange.
[the entry popup says but why is Alpha here?, when theres absolutely no sign of him. At least put some you hear Alpha shouting in the distance or sth. This Magical Infodump is bad]
<goldbrickers are tools. I kill them. meet more horsemen. kill them too. meet alpha. send him off to interrogation room for omega. meet midas. rip his skin off. leave>
[This was a very short mission. the clue for Midas skin is
odd? According to canon, his skin is harder than diamond, so Im not sure itd be that easy to rip off, tbh. Maybe you could have you chipped a bit of Midas skin off in thwe titanic battle or similar?]
<omega reveals he tipped off alpha to where I was going. what a tool. after interrogation, blue steel arrives, frees alpha
a likely story.
[thats
just, er, not very good Im sorry. Unless Im missing some ultra-dimensional level of ironic wit here?]
<next artifact needed is hair from pyriss. hair in snake cave. snakes tools. lol. snakes tools>
Mission 3: Find the Lock of Pyriss Hair
[entry popup is a reference to Snakes on a Plane, I think. The Nav reads 10 patches of dirt to sift through Im only a lvl 15, I know, but this is pretty demeaning. Your contact isnt really giving me a very strong reason to go scratching in the muck of a snake cave for him. Id mehquit by now if this was incognito, Im sorry to say]
<hair hidden somewhere in cave. dirty snakes leave crap everywhere. shed skin, snakeshit, gross. makes me angry.>
[There's nothing here but snake droppings. says the system message for each pile of dirt]
<snake feces. yup>
[after looking through ten patches of excrement, I dont even find the hair, and then the Nav changes to Defeat Alpha (again). I fight him again and at defeat he activates his emergency teleport. Ive lost all will to play this.]
<exit cave and return to omega. initiate subsystem automatic non-sentient combat control node in 10 seconds
wont
need
to
experience
rest->
[well, Topsys had enough. The next mission is to get the three remaining artifacts wee need from a warehouse controlled my Azuria. One of the artifacts is the hair we missed last mission (making it totally pointless, IMO), another is a Fragment of the Spirit world stolen from some Spectral Pirates, and a Spetsnaz badge
So this missions going to have spetsnaz, ghost pirates, and horsemen in it then.]
Mission 4: Gather the Final Artifacts for the Portal
[nav reads ]14 crates to search through. the entry popup tells me theres horsemen, spetsnaz, spectralmpirates, and says whoo! you love it!. I dont, Im afraid. I dont know what it is. Maybe its the AT? Maybe Im spoiled? but FOURTEEN?
I make my way through the map. To be fair, the clues for the various objects found in the crates are often amusing, but I dont care theyre just piecework. I meet Alpha again, beat him again, and he teleports to safety again. Its interesting being able to take a lvl 18
oh., I just got killed by a damn patrol of effing ghosts whilst I was typing this. Great. Minus five hundred thousand million billion trillion stars.
I guess I should have been looking, so my bad. I hosp and come back.
Like I was saying, I know Im only a lvl 18, but its interesting being able to take that low a toon up against the most powerful mob in the entire game. Whats that? But he is. Alpha is more powerful than Stateseman or LR, or any GM, or anything, because HES BLOODY INVINCIBLE. I defeat him, and hes back the very next mission. I hate him. And not in a ooh, [shakes fist], Ill get you, Lex Luthor! kind of Nemesis way. I hate him like I hate wasps.]
ah
I see, it wasnt a patrol, it was an ambush! Brilliant.
A little while later, Im ambushed again, by Spetsnaz this time. I ignore them and run to the next floor, anxious to get through the rest of the crates. Before I can check the last 4, I have to fight a group of Horsemen (BTW, are they recoloured Longbow?). The Spetsnaz arrive mid fight, just to irritate me even more. After I deal with them, I start to check the crates
and notice that the missions been completed. When did that happen?
Then problem was that I had three things to collect out of 14, but none of them were mentioned in the Nav and so I stopped concentrating on the crates, thinking that maybe Id get them all from one source at the end. Anyway, Ive got them now, so I guess I can leave.
Oh god. The secret that Omega reveals to me now utilizes THE piece of canon I hate the most. I think its terrible in game, and I think its terrible here. Im /facepalming with both hands at the same time. Id /facefoot if I could, too, with both feet, at the same time that I was double /facepalming.
I have to build a portal to Praetoria for the final mission
and beat up Alpha again.]
Mission 5: Send the Artifacts to Praetoria
[Inside the untidy warehouse, Im attacked by some horsemen. I beat them up, and then find the five pieces of portal tech im looking for in crates all spawned near the front together. Im quite happy with that. The Nav changes to find the Dimensional Mainframe, so I jetpack through the map to seek it. I find it, and repair it, and then Alpha spawns, again literally in front of me. I have yet another fight with him, and this time he doesnt teleport away (Why, I wonder? what happened to his incredible emergency teleporter? ran out of juice? didnt pay his Portal Corp bill?) He does tell me some bad news, however. Hes changed the coordinates apparently, so its possible Ive sent the artifacts not to Paetorian Earth but to some other world (Kashyyyk, maybe, I[d like to see what the Wookies would do with a Bowler hat, some hair, and a badge).
Curse the meddling Horsemen fools! shouts Omega when I get back to him with the news that this entire farrago might have been for nothing. And thats basically it.
So. This is a villainous arc, and THE HEROES WIN. Brilliant.
Sorry, but this was not fun. Thats about as nicely as I can put it. The premise is good for a low-level arc Doodad hunts are par for the course for lowbies, but the constant appearance of that coalsmoker Alpha was teeth-grindingly annoying. The mission with the Russians, the ghosts and the horsemen made no sense, and the scrabble about in the snake crap mission was demeaning and pointless. The reason why those artifacts in particular were used made me groan out loud, but thats mainly because I HATE the particular piece of canon that you referenced.
On the plus side
Minimal typos, you took care to give system messages etc, the maps were absolutely fine, no quarrel with them at all, and the actual mobs you chose offered a nice non-aggravating combat experience (no mezzes or too much KB or stuff like that). Also, the clues you gave for the various objects in the last mission were sometimes very amusing
So, what to rate? Well, It wasn't as bad as Chains of Blood, and that got 3 stars. But, it doesn't deserve more, at least from me. I'm afraid. So 3 stars for you!
Sorry.
Eco.
MArcs:
The Echo, Arc ID 1688 (5mish, easy, drama)
The Audition, Arc ID 221240 (6 mish, complex mech, comedy)
Storming Citadel, Arc ID 379488 (lowbie, 1mish, 10-min timed)
Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Samuel_Tow
[The Incarnate System is] Jack Emmert all over again, only this time it's not "1 hero = 3 white minions" it's "1 hero = 3 white rocks."
|
So I just have a little tiny queue of four arcs now!
Poi, Demonology, and Everything I Learned From Hellions 164235
The Consequences of War 227331 and 241496
The Fracturing of Time 171031
Quick reperat of the 'rules' for my subs:
no malta
no KoA
no or limited mezzes, please, or at least no damn slows
any level, either faction
If there are no more submissions, I'll be running some of the suggested arcs in the 'looking for mechanically complex arcs' thread I posted a few days ago.
Eco.
MArcs:
The Echo, Arc ID 1688 (5mish, easy, drama)
The Audition, Arc ID 221240 (6 mish, complex mech, comedy)
Storming Citadel, Arc ID 379488 (lowbie, 1mish, 10-min timed)
Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Samuel_Tow
[The Incarnate System is] Jack Emmert all over again, only this time it's not "1 hero = 3 white minions" it's "1 hero = 3 white rocks."
|
Poi, Demonology, and Everything I Learned From Hellions, Arc ID 164235A, by @londerwost
Medium length (2 unique maps), heroic, lvl 1-14. Ill be taking my lowest level toon at present, Tumbleweed Jackson, my lvl 4 AR/Dev Blaster. Heres his bio:
Howdy, pardner. Tumbleweed Jackson's the name. I hail from Arizona. Why'd I quit the quiet life on the open range fer this here city of mayhem, y'all ask? Well, life on the open range would have been jes' fine fer me, if'n it wassn't fer all the damn space aliens and the magic nazis and robot pirates from Mars that kept tryin' ter rustle my damn cattle all the damn time! So I figured, if'n ahm a-gonna be twirlin' mah six-guns every day against Orbo the Beast with a Zillion Eyes, ah might as well come do it in the big city where they gots hot water and clean sheets in the hotels, 'stead of a tin bath an' a cold plunge! Plus ah traded mah revolvers in fer somethin' with a little more lead in its pencil! Ya-hoo!
Apropos of nothing in particular, hes inspired by Spurs Jackson and for one whole level (the tutorial) he was actually called that, lol, but trademark infringement and outright stealing of characters always irks me, and (even considering Spurs obscurity and short-livedness) I felt compelled to reroll him as Tumbleweed Jackson and start again.
Come the Going Rogue expansion, Ill probably reroll hima s a Dual Pistols sth if we gert that powerset as is rumoured.
Howdy, yall! That fine lookin woman Mizz Liberty asked Tumbleweed fer help today, an so I gits along like a dawgy after a muskrat ter help the little lady out. Yes, maam! Woo-hoo! First, she wants me ter ride the range, see whats what. Sure thing, little lady! Woo-hoo! Git!
[Pound the pavement, Ms Liberty says; find someone called the Mole, who has info. OK.]
Mission1: Search the Streets
I mosey on through the streets, my eyes like gimlets an my mouth a hard thin line
mmmrrffgkllgf
, jes mah little joke, there, pardner! My mouth us a hard thin line, get it? Woo-hoo! Anyways, theres Hellions all over. Some of em give me a little trouble, but I twirls mah sixteen-shooter and that shuts em up! I finds me a crazy magic altar with a load of pamphlets talking about a mass sacrifice. Satanists! I done tell ya, after the Nazis from the Moon and the Creature from the Sun, I hates Satanists the most! I have a mosey on down the street some more, and get into a ruckus with a Hellion with real fire-breath. its a showdown, and his toes turn up first. He drops some more strange documents, but I caint read
After I done cleaned up the town a bit more, I rescue a big galoot from some Hellions, and he tells me what the strange Satanic markings mean. The Hellions are gonna have a party! A Satanic devil-worshipping kind of party! Not while this Sheriffs in town, they aint! Yee-Hah! I hotfoot it back to Mizz Liberty.
[Outdoor Steel map, not too big, hellions all over. The glowie is easy to spot, the Boss is a suitably lowbie fight, and the Mole is in an appropriate animation. I have some fun clearing for a while during this mission, and Im almost at the next level from it ]
Mizz Liberty is a mite shocked to hear aboput the sacrificial hoedown the Hellions gots planned, but the rest of Statesmans posse are in Independence Port fighting a Giant Monster! Shes going it alone! I like her, shes got spirit, that gal! She asks me ter go and git Statesman, and hares off
.
[lol I like the gag here with her telling you to not follow her. Of course Im going to!]
she did say theres no time, Ahm sure she can use some help
[besides, Im level 4 Independence port? No thanks lol]
Mission 2: Disobey Ms Liberty
Hot dawg, this place is loud
This may be a chewin off a mite too much baccy! Still, the little lady is here somewhere, an I wouldnt be a gentleman ifn ah didnt at least try to help
[Rave party map, and the popup sort of sobered my wacky mood a little in a good way. I like this arc.]
I keep mah big gun handy, and soon ahm in a runnin firefight with some packin hellions. I get a few of them ready for Boot Hill
[and I level, yay!]
and then I gets a mite angry, and somethin like a red mist comes over me, and I goes on a little shootin n tootin frenxy for a little while
I comes round and Im in a room with a bunch of bombs! I check the room is clear, an carefully disarms them.
[Nav reads 4 gasoline bombs to disarm, as well as find Ms Liberty
There are three glowie bombs in the room found by taking first left, first left from the entrance, and the first one I click drops the Treating the Synptom clue. This seems a little incongruous, since Ive still got one bomb left and the clues mentioned thwarting the Hellions.
Ah, I just spotted the last bomb, in the same room. Disarming it makes the Nav show up with the Defeat the Hellion Leader clue. Maybe you could have the clue and the Nav drop from the same bomb?]
Once Ive disarmed the bombs they were gasoline bombs, too, the worst kind in my opinion I gets real ornery, and, well, Im a gonna find the leader of this here gang, and were gonna have us a pistol-whippin!
Ah make my way to the big party room, and find the Main Man. We tussle, and with the help of a Hosanna and a hail o bullets, Hes ready for a fittin from Coffin Joe. I also find Mizz Liberty, kinda in trouble. She says she thinks they drugged her, after I see off the mangy dawgs whore bein mean to her. I help her out, and she rushes off to the ladies room
[Hmm, the fight with the lead Hellion was fine, and rescuing Ms Liberty was nice I was worried shed be an Ally, which isnt needed this low I think. However, Im not sure the jokey reason for her being sick you give in the drop fits. I dont know if shed be immune to drugs or poisons, but Id have preferred a straight treatment here. Also, there were no party-goers lured, it is revealed, so I didnt rescue anyone. A couple of hostages to rescue would add a few more objectives, and make me feel like Id done some good rather than just stop a building being burned down. That said, the maps got that music and the lights, giving it a suitably epic feel for a lowbie, this would be an exciting mission IMO]
Once Mizz Liberty is back on her feet, she thanks me fer savin her
aw, shucks, ahm blushin
[nice little starter arc, with a slightly more serious tone at the end itd be a 5-starrer IMO. 4 stars]
Eco
EDIT - After I finished the arc, I had to go train, and I was in Atlas, so visiting Ms Liberty was doubly nice lol
MArcs:
The Echo, Arc ID 1688 (5mish, easy, drama)
The Audition, Arc ID 221240 (6 mish, complex mech, comedy)
Storming Citadel, Arc ID 379488 (lowbie, 1mish, 10-min timed)
Quote:
|
Originally Posted by Samuel_Tow
[The Incarnate System is] Jack Emmert all over again, only this time it's not "1 hero = 3 white minions" it's "1 hero = 3 white rocks."
|
If you're taking submissions again, feel free to try my other arc: 1152, The Doctor Returns. It's got enough character hijacking and identity crisis to choke a Venture, but is still good enough to get three stars from him.
Winner of Players' Choice Best Villainous Arc 2010: Fear and Loathing on Striga; ID #350522
QR
I wanted to thank you for reviewing Tailor Made. I'm mostly using the MA for writing practice so it's gratifying to hear you enjoyed the dialog.
I actually started out with mostly fashion related destructable objects, but early feedback wanted more variety in the objects to destroy. I'm ok with that and I know I'll never please everyone.
Anyway, I'd comment more but I'm posting this from my phone at Comic Con. I just wanted to say thanks for the review!
Thanks for this awesome in character review of my hellion arc! It made me lol! 
I think most of the issues you braught up are things I wanted but was unable to due to MA limitations. I actually created and detailed two funny raver hostages that were going to educate Hellions on rave culture in a humorous way. Unfortunately, the party map didn't have the room. I was also disappointed to find that clues attached to objects drop on the first glowy by design. I can't change it. Might be able to re write the clue to fit better.
As far as the funny Ms. Liberty goes, it was suposed to be the drum hit joke ending after she's belittled your character. I originally didn't spell it out but some people didn't get it so I felt I hadn't done a good enough job on detail. Damned if ya do and all that.
Thank you sooo much for doing this! 
[ QUOTE ]
So I just have a little tiny queue of four arcs now!
Poi, Demonology, and Everything I Learned From Hellions 164235
The Consequences of War 227331 and 241496
The Fracturing of Time 171031
Quick reperat of the 'rules' for my subs:
no malta
no KoA
no or limited mezzes, please, or at least no damn slows
any level, either faction
If there are no more submissions, I'll be running some of the suggested arcs in the 'looking for mechanically complex arcs' thread I posted a few days ago.
Eco.
[/ QUOTE ]
Well, if you want lowbie arcs, you can probably do alright with Bricked Electronics (2180), or Dream Paper (1874). First one has less mez-prone enemy groups than the second.
Up with the overworld! Up with exploration! | Want a review of your arc?
My arcs: Dream Paper (ID: 1874) | Bricked Electronics (ID: 2180) | The Bravuran Jobs (ID: 5073) | Backwards Day (ID: 329000) | Operation Fair Trade (ID: 391172)
Thanks for that review.
You know, I tried and I tried to get those chained objectives to spawn properly, but the MA is just too bugged for it to be consistent. I experienced different spawn points for various objectives in consecutive test runs. By the end, I just lost patience with the entire ordeal. I used small maps so if backtracking becomes necessary, you won't have to go far. I hope for the day when they decide to number the spawn points on maps and let us choose a number for our objectives. As it is, although your concern is valid, it's not something within the architect's power to fully control.
You were asking for more foreshadowing, but I noticed you commented on exactly none of the patrol dialogues scattered throughout all missions. There is a trove of interesting tidbits to be found here.
Speaking of foreshadowing, I'm not sure if you checked the arc souvenir, but it makes of a point of mentioning the remaining open-ended plot points from the arc as a way to set you up for the stories that will follow.
Thanks again for playing and for the review. I will take note of your suggestions.