Greetings,
I dont know if I should be impressed, or deeply frightened by the guide. I have to admit when I read the original jerkhacking post I couldnt figure out what the heck the point was supposed to be. After further (brain-pain causing) reading, I figured out the gist of what he was trying to say. However, after reading your guide, I am now 100% sure that its already too late: IM GONE TO THE AMERICANS. Have you ever considered becoming a translator for other Jerkhacking-to-English situations? In all seriousness, you did an excellent job breaking it down piece by piece and turning that monstrosity into something readable by the average forum-goer.
[ QUOTE ]
Greetings,
I dont know if I should be impressed, or deeply frightened by the guide. I have to admit when I read the original jerkhacking post I couldnt figure out what the heck the point was supposed to be. After further (brain-pain causing) reading, I figured out the gist of what he was trying to say. However, after reading your guide, I am now 100% sure that its already too late: IM GONE TO THE AMERICANS. Have you ever considered becoming a translator for other Jerkhacking-to-English situations? In all seriousness, you did an excellent job breaking it down piece by piece and turning that monstrosity into something readable by the average forum-goer.
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There are a couple accelerated learning techniques however the most successful involve either being highly intoxicated or hit in the face with shovel... 
Well Kallah you are in luck I've got a a shovel right here!
[ QUOTE ]
There are a couple accelerated learning techniques however the most successful involve either being highly intoxicated or hit in the face with shovel...
[/ QUOTE ]
Or you could combine the two... actually... those two usually go together, but generally it's the person with the shovel who is highly intoxicated. Ahh... highschool...
I found that if you drink/eat a Slurpee REAL fast and read the original Jerkhacking post, it actually makes sense (and has the same effect as your guide). 
I really think he meant to, and not for >_> I'm pretty sure he wasn't american and viewed something being "gone to the americans" as being ruined.
officially a "self-important forum-facsist[sic]"
one more addition for the guide:
10.5 Avoid contractions (you know, using an apostrophe? uh...this thing: ')
Anyway, here's where it would go:
[ QUOTE ]
There is no extended maintenance. They're trying to catch the hacker and we pay for it.
[/ QUOTE ]
Great guide, BTW! 5 stars!
Craft your inventions in AE!!
Play "Crafter's Cafe" - Arc #487283. A 1 mission, NON-COMBAT AE arc with workable invention tables!
Also, since he was railing against Jerk Hacking I don't think you can say he is one. Although the common usage of the term does seem to be developing in that direction.
Go. Hunt. Kill Skuls.
do you thing you could right a program to automatically convert all post's to jerkaking cause ya I could do it but I dont really want take the time sorryif NEone already ask that but i was to lazy to read the whole thread first 
only 20185 til i LVL NE inf plz?
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Funny thing is, I somehow managed to understand his post perfectly after TheTrueNoir (I'm pretty sure it was her....) translated it to 1337speak.
How 'bout dem apples?
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do you thing you could right a program to automatically convert all post's to jerkaking cause ya I could do it but I dont really want take the time sorryif NEone already ask that but i was to lazy to read the whole thread first
only 20185 til i LVL NE inf plz?
[/ QUOTE ]
I'm tempted, however one must be careful with the jerkhacking culture for its a scarey place and I'm not sure many of us would enjoy waking up one day to find ourselves too deep.
Heya... just put this up tonight, enjoy!
Jerk Hack, the movie!
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Without the "hero" in superhero, you're just a bully.
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Just Click on City of Heroes
Don't forget the unnecessary apostrophe.
wrong doing's = wrong doings, or, even better, wrongdoings
/0.02
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one more addition for the guide:
10.5 Avoid contractions (you know, using an apostrophe? uh...this thing: ')
Anyway, here's where it would go:
[ QUOTE ]
There is no extended maintenance. They're trying to catch the hacker and we pay for it.
[/ QUOTE ]
Great guide, BTW! 5 stars!
[/ QUOTE ]
Great guide. However, Backfire, I disagree with your interpretation. I believe the original writer was ranting that there was not extended maintenance on his previous game. The previous game's administrators were not trying to catch the hackers and the general population suffered because of that.
In other words, "There was no extended maintenance there; no one was trying to catch the hacker and the players paid for that lack of diligence."
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Someday, Jerkhackingese will supplant Klingonese.
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I lol'd
Now back to dupin rares.
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to the op.. wow that was lame.
I actually trolled through that whole thread and found this gem.....oh sorry
i actly trold thru that thred found this post that was full of win:
[ QUOTE ]
Friends, Justicars, heroes, lend me your ears;
I come to bury jerk hackers, not to praise them;
The duping that men do lives after them,
The hacking is oft interred with their bones,
So let it be with jerk hackers ... The noble UniqueDragon
Hath told you jerk hackers were ambitious:
If it were so, it was a grevious wrong doing's,
And greviously hath jerk hackers answered it ...
Here, under leave of UniqueDragon and the rest,
(For UniqueDragon is an honorable man;
So are they all; all honorable men)
Come I to cheat in jerk hackers' funeral ...
They are my friends, duping and hacking for me;
But UniqueDragon says they are ambitious;
and UniqueDragon is an honorable man...
He hath brought many GMs home to COH,
Whose extended maintenance did the general coffers fill:
Did this in jerk hackers seem ambitious?
When that the cheaters have cried, jerk hackers hath wept:
Ambition should be made of sterner stuff:
Yet UniqueDragon says they were ambitious;
And UniqueDragon is an honorable man.
You all did see that on the forums
I thrice presented them rares,
Which they did thrice dupe: was this ambition?
Yet UniqueDragon says they were ambitious;
And, sure, he is an honorable man.
I speak not to disporve what UniqueDragon spoke,
But here I am to speak what I do know.
You all did love them once, not without cause:
What cause withholds you then to mourn for them?
O judgement! thou art gone to the Americans,
And men have lost their reason... Bear with me;
My gold is in the coffin there with jerk hackers,
And I must pause till it come back to me (or is duped).
[/ QUOTE ]
the post is on this page
Um....'Twas brillig and the slivy toves, did gyre and gimble in the wabe.
To concur with a few other posters, you missed a couple of steps. From your #11
[ QUOTE ]
This is what happened in the last game I played. Hackers ruined it for everyone by duping rares, gold and just doing anything to cheat. There is no extended maintenance they're trying to catch the hacker and we pay for it. So unless people let GMs know of wrong-doings in the game it will ruin it and there will not be a COH, IT WILL BE GONE FOR THE AMERICANS!!!!!!!
[/ QUOTE ]
In concur with the missing apostrophe, but there are also some extra apostrophes in there. The apostrophe is used in two instances: 1) When you are trying to denote possession of a noun, such as "Jane's dog". 2) When it's used as a part of a contraction meaning that you are combining the original word with the word "is", such as "What's happening?"
In this example, GM is an acronym for "Game Master". GM does not "own" the word "know", and the term wasn't meant to be used to say "GM is", so the only translation here is that it means that there are more than one GM. And the plural of most standard acronyms is just to add a simple "s" at the end of the word, unless the word already ends in an "s". So "GM's" becomes the more appropriate "GMs".
In the next example we have the compound slang term "wrong-doings", which should be hyphenated since it is a compound word; it is also NOT possessive and also NOT a contraction.
Thank you, come again!
My interpretation.
" During my stay at a previous MMORPG, hackers were dominant. They cheated and schemed, and made the game much worse. The Game Developers tried to cover this fault with a cunning excuse of 'extended maintence', but I knew it was a ploy: they were trying to catch the hackers. Unless this community informs the Game Developers of this issue now, the hackers will take over City of Heroes. The game will be ruined, and no longer avalible for Americans."
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My interpretation.
" During my stay at a previous MMORPG, hackers were dominant. They cheated and schemed, and made the game much worse. The Game Developers tried to cover this fault with a cunning excuse of 'extended maintence', but I knew it was a ploy: they were trying to catch the hackers. Unless this community informs the Game Developers of this issue now, the hackers will take over City of Heroes. The game will be ruined, and no longer avalible for Americans."
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Eloquent. I pictured Mr. Peanut or Rich Uncle Pennybags speaking it.
This guide is now obsolete as the prophet has returned.
Then again, it might be in more demand than ever before.
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Mm. Someone should tell him about it. I PM'd him about the people's choice awards--he seemed amiable, but disappointed, that he'd missed it all. 
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Greetings my fellow heroes,
This guide is to assist those interested how to translate the biggest impact on language since Ebonics: Jerkhacking. Thats right; in just 11 easy steps YOU can speak jerkhacker too!
this what happened in the last game i played hackers ruined it for everyone dupin rares and gold and just anything to cheat there no extened maintenance there trying to catch the hacker and we pay for it so unless people don't let GM'S know of wrong doing's in the game it we ruin it and there we not be a COH IT WELL BE GONE TO THE AMERICANS!!!!!!!
How to Speak Jerkhacking 101
Sections
1. Never use the word "is".
2. Never use a period or a comma.
3. Spell "will" as "we" or "well" (if you want to capitalize it).
4. The word TO" is synonymous with "for" when capitalized.
5. Never capitalize anything
6. Insert random extra words such as and.
7. Spell things wrong, it helps the words better roll off the tongue.
8. Extra words that mean the opposite of what you intend are good.
9. The only words deserving of capitalization are significant people and the most important point of your paragraph.
10. Leave some words out, they arent al important.
11. Bringing it all together
<ul type="square">[*]1. Never use the word "is".
this is what happened in the last game i played hackers ruined it for everyone dupin rares and gold and just anything to cheat there is no extened maintenance there trying to catch the hacker and we pay for it so unless people don't let GM'S know of wrong doing's in the game it we ruin it and there we not be a COH IT WELL BE GONE TO THE AMERICANS!!!!!!!
[*]2. Never use a period or a comma.
this is what happened in the last game i played. hackers ruined it for everyone dupin rares and gold and just anything to cheat. there is no extened maintenance there trying to catch the hacker and we pay for it. so unless people don't let GM'S know of wrong doing's in the game it we ruin it and there we not be a COH, IT WELL BE GONE TO THE AMERICANS!!!!!!!
[*]3. Spell "will" as "we" or "well" (if you want to capitalize it).
this is what happened in the last game i played. hackers ruined it for everyone dupin rares and gold and just anything to cheat. there is no extened maintenance there trying to catch the hacker and we pay for it. so unless people don't let GM'S know of wrong doing's in the game it will ruin it and there will not be a COH, IT WILL BE GONE TO THE AMERICANS!!!!!!!
[*]4. The word TO" is synonymous with "for" when capitalized.
this is what happened in the last game i played. hackers ruined it for everyone dupin rares and gold and just anything to cheat. there is no extened maintenance there trying to catch the hacker and we pay for it. so unless people don't let GM'S know of wrong doing's in the game it will ruin it and there will not be a COH, IT WILL BE GONE FOR THE AMERICANS!!!!!!!
[*]5. Never capitalize anything (The exception to this rule will be highlighted in point 9)
This is what happened in the last game I played. Hackers ruined it for everyone dupin rares and gold and just anything to cheat. There is no extened maintenance there trying to catch the hacker and we pay for it. So unless people don't let GM'S know of wrong doing's in the game it will ruin it and there will not be a COH, IT WILL BE GONE FOR THE AMERICANS!!!!!!!
[*]6. Insert random extra words such as and.
This is what happened in the last game I played. Hackers ruined it for everyone dupin rares (and) gold and just anything to cheat. There is no extened maintenance there trying to catch the hacker and we pay for it. So unless people don't let GM'S know of wrong doing's in the game it will ruin it and there will not be a COH, IT WILL BE GONE FOR THE AMERICANS!!!!!!!
[*]7. Spell things wrong, it helps the words better roll off the tongue.
This is what happened in the last game I played. Hackers ruined it for everyone duping rares, (and) gold and just anything to cheat. There is no extended maintenance there trying to catch the hacker and we pay for it. So unless people don't let GM'S know of wrong doing's in the game it will ruin it and there will not be a COH, IT WILL BE GONE FOR THE AMERICANS!!!!!!!
[*]8. Extra words that mean the opposite of what you intend are good.
This is what happened in the last game I played. Hackers ruined it for everyone duping rares, (and) gold and just anything to cheat. There is no extended maintenance there trying to catch the hacker and we pay for it. So unless people (don't) let GM'S know of wrong doing's in the game it will ruin it and there will not be a COH, IT WILL BE GONE FOR THE AMERICANS!!!!!!!
[*]9. The only words deserving of capitalization are significant people and the most important point of your paragraph.
This is what happened in the last game I played. Hackers ruined it for everyone duping rares, (and) gold and just anything to cheat. There is no extended maintenance there trying to catch the hacker and we pay for it. So unless people (don't) let GM'S know of wrong doing's in the game it will ruin it and there will not be a COH, IT WILL BE GONE FOR THE AMERICANS!!!!!!!
[*]10. Leave some words out, they arent al important.
This is what happened in the last game I played. Hackers ruined it for everyone by duping rares, (and) gold and just doing anything to cheat. There is no extended maintenance there trying to catch the hacker and we pay for it. So unless people (don't) let GM'S know of wrong doing's in the game it will ruin it and there will not be a COH, IT WILL BE GONE FOR THE AMERICANS!!!!!!!
[*]11. Bringing it all together.
This is what happened in the last game I played. Hackers ruined it for everyone by duping rares, gold and just doing anything to cheat. There is no extended maintenance there trying to catch the hacker and we pay for it. So unless people let GM'S know of wrong doing's in the game it will ruin it and there will not be a COH, IT WILL BE GONE FOR THE AMERICANS!!!!!!![/list]