The Ultimatum

If your girlfriend (or boyfriend, or whatever you call your significant other) told you that you had to choose between her (him/it/them/whatever) and City of Heroes, which would you pick?

...

I picked you guys.

Okay, that's a bit of an over-simplification of things, and it didn't help her accusations that I'm addicted to vidjagames... but I still think I chose the right answer.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nethergoat it's NEVER too late to pad your /ignore list!

Depends. Were you in the middle of a task force?

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Currently listening to Younha's Songs - Teen's Collection

Well, I'm married, so I don't really have a choice.

City of Heroes all the way!

Well... it depends. How much do you game? If you're playing every day, and most of the hours when you're not working/going to school, you have a bit of a problem, I would say. I love writing, reading, photography, and video games, but I'm not going to spend all my free time with those things, either. My wife would rightly get upset, and even if I wasn't married, I'd be a little obsessed.

Now, if you only play a few days out of the week for a couple hours or something, that's not unreasonable for a hobby. Depending on what it is, your decision might have been right. Any hobby is fine, done in moderation. Well... depends on the hobby. I need to remember what forumites I'm talking to. But playing video games for a hobby is not a bad hobby, and cheaper than many hobbies you can have. So if she was begrudging you playing games at all, I would say that is an issue.

I'm not sure GP is the best person to ask for advice on matters like this...

?

Why... because I suggested you shouldn't follow a hobby every minute that you aren't sleeping or working? If so... ummm, what's wrong with moderation?

/em whipping sound

I believe they're implying your opinion isn't valid because you're married.

In my opinion, if you're a gamer and the person you're dating/married to isn't a gamer then you're doing it wrong.

Sorry to hear Chad.

As a person married to a non gamer I find advantages and disadvantages to it.
If you spend too much of your free time gaming and not giving attention to your relationship then that could be a problem. Of course there are those who find any gaming a waste of time and want every second of your free time focused on them which to me is unreasonable.

Sounds like she was mad because you wouldn't PL her.

Sounds like you're better off, Chad.

Wait... she was a Juggalette and thought *anime* was smutty?

Chad... yup, I would say that's on her end. You obviously were making time to be with her and she wasn't cutting a lot of slack on your end. That hour late for a date thing was just... ridiculous. I'd get sick of that kind of behavior immediately. If you're really late, you have no right to get mad at me when I make you wait a few minutes.

Heck, if anything, I'd say she was coming up with an excuse to fight with you. You're not being unreasonable with your hobby, so to say you're obsessed is a bit much.

My wife doesn't mind games and plays them off and on, but she doesn't like CoH enough to justify an account, she says. She'd feel obligated to play to make it worthwhile, and she'd just want to play once in awhile. Which I get. I'm glad she understands my playing, though!

Hi. My name is NIGHT RUNNER. (Not really.) Or Uldar the Skilled. (In my other game; but again, not really.) And I am a MMORPG addict.

But it is a nice addiction. It doesn't cost much. No one dies (at least not literally.) I remain functional: I work to support myself and my household, I eat, I sleep and I shower fairly regularly. I am capable of conversation about things OTHER than the games I play. I can even sit in the living room (without game in sight) and perform my central matrimonial function: a good ear as my wife reviews the drama of her day (and she's a high school teacher, so there's a fair bit of drama to cover )

My wife is not a gamer. She doesn't understand my gaming. She says.

And then I catch her playing Spider Solitaire when there are any number of other things she could/should be doing. So she isn't into MMORPGs, but she does understand addiction.

Going back to the OP, it sounds like there were a lot of issues OTHER than the gaming. I think it is very important to recognize our partners for who they are and take a look at the whole package on balance, good and bad. Yes, I game. Yes, I can be a little obesessed about it at times (like when I was depressed/melancholy for two weeks after getting a new computer because I couldn't play my games the way I used to). But I can also carry on normal engaging conversation with people. I perform comedy improv. And some people (my wife included) even find me intelligent and witty on occasion.

So I think the challenge is to find a nice woman with a balanced perspective. I don't know if you're as ancient as I am (44), but I have found that once they get past their "bad boy" and/or "I can fix him" stages, some women can be pretty sensible. (I'm sure that there is a parallel comment that can be made about people of my gender.)

/e ducks any possible objects thrown in his direction