[ QUOTE ]
Dr Vazhilok's Favourite Song:
"Leprosy, I'm not half the man I used to be,
Bits keep falling off of me,
Since I went down,
With Leprosy
Why I lost my toe I don't know
It wouldn't stay.
I lost something long,
Now it's gone,
to Leprosy
[/ QUOTE ]
Nice. I heard he was fond of "I Left My Heart In San Francisco" too...
Is it time for the dance of joy yet?
[ QUOTE ]
Q: What did the Zombie say to the Kings Row ******?
A: Keep the tip. 
[/ QUOTE ]
Hear about the zombie who enterd the poker tournament?
Didn't do well - he kept throwing his hand in.
By my mohawk shall ye know me!
my toons
Funny: Ee-Ai-Ee-Ai-Oh! #3662 * The foul-mouthed Handyman! #1076 * City of Norms #132944
Serious: To Save A Single World (#83744) * Marketing Opportunity (#83747)
what a good thing about a Clockwork Princes?
there always geared up
Post deleted by Mothers_Love
!!!News Alert!!!!
A recent rikti monkey out break at a crey testing labs has just happened, but thing don't seem that bad atm as the rikti monkey seem to work better then the current Researcher & Scientist as they sloved the promblem for earth monkey a machine to fling there poo at things
I don't get the Talshak one. D:
Mumsies tip of the day:
Overwhelmed by a Zombie Invasion?: Suck the eyes from attacking zombies using a Black and Decker DustBuster. The zombies will then wander around aimlessly and can be dispatched by the usual methods at a more leisurely pace.
Fan of Hero1?: Simulate a Rikti Invasion/abduction by drinking two bottles of Vodka, you'll invariably wake up in a strange place the following morning with a grey Pallor and a communication abnormality, having had your memory mysteriously erased.
Two vahzilok zombies jump into Independance port...
plink plink fizzzzz
---------------------
How do you know embalmed cadavers have dandruff?
you can find their head and shoulders in the shower
---------------------
A man goes into a restaraunt in Croatoa. It's one of those places where you choose a fish from the tank and they cook it for you.
This man decides he wants the Squid, and points it out a little green one with a little bit of fur above its upper lip. The waiter, whose name is Jervais, grabs the squid and goes off to cook it.
However, Jervais the waiter has actually made a pet of the little squid, and can't bring himself to cook it. He's staring down at the squid, which is staring up back at him, and thinks "no, I can't do it". So he takes the squid back, and tells the customer that squid is off, and would he care to choose another dish.
The customer sees that the squid is back in the tank, swimming about happily, and says 'no! I want that little green squid, dammit! I want it now!'. So Jervais again grabs the squid and goes off to the kitchen to do the deed.
He just can't do it. There's his mate the squid staring up at him with its cute hairy lip .. so he shouts to the local withc hunter, a hard man, whose name is Hans.
"Hans" he says "Come and chop this squid up .. I can't do it!!"
Hans replies "No, mate .. I like him too. I won't do it. He's too cute"
So Jervais returns the squid to the tank, once more, and explains to the manager the situation, a tear in his eye. Hans backs him up, also blubbing a little.
The manager walks up to the customer and says:
I'm sorry, that squid is off the menu".
"WHY?!" says the customer, angry that he hasn't got his squid yet.
"Because Hans, who guts witches, is as soft as Jervais, with mild green furry lip squid"
*Applauds as wildly as she did in-game 
Evangel received a pet Rikti money for his veteran reward. This monkey was fully grown with a bad attitude and a worse vocabulary. Every other word was an expletive. Those that weren't expletives were, to say the least, rude.
Evangel tried hard to change the alien's attitude. He was constantly saying polite words, playing soft music, and anything else that came to mind. Nothing worked. He yelled at the monkey and the monkey got worse. He shook the
thing and the monkey got madder and ruder.
Finally, in a moment of desperation, Evangel put the monkey in the freezer. For a few moments he heard it banging, kicking and screaming and then, suddenly, all was quiet.
Frightened that he might have actually hurt the creature, Evangel quickly opened the freezer door. The monkey calmly stepped out onto Evangel's extended arm and said:
"I'm sorry that I offended you with my language and actions. I ask for your forgiveness."
Evangel was astounded at the monkey's change in attitude and was about to ask what changed him when the monkey continued: "May I ask what the chicken
did?"
One of Dr Creed's worst experiments resulted in him cloning himself.
Initially he was very pleased with his simulcrum, which was perfect in every way except for being blessed with the foulest mouth and bluest vocabulary imaginable.
He was encouraged to present his clone at various technical seminars in the Rogue Isles, including Dr Aeon's symposium on metahumans where his clone embarrassed everyone by telling Lord Recluse exactly what he could do with those extra limbs.
In despair Dr Aeon felt compelled to rid himself of his doppleganger, and resorted to throwing him from the highest building in the Nerva Archipelago, where the clone plumetted to its death.
Since the clone technically was him, and he was alive, he was not charged with murder but was happy to plead guilty to the lesser charge of making an obscene clone fall.
Thelonious Monk
I played water polo the other day..
It was terrible...
My horse drowned...
- groan-tastic!
Purple, the purple villain woke one morning in his purple bed, put on his purple suit and thought to himself, "Hmm I think I might go to Purple Street in Kings Row and rob the purple bank! So he strolled over there broke down the purple doors, defeated the purple agents, and stole the purple bag of money. Then Purple the purple hero showed up and yelled, "Stop Purple! I, Purple will show you the wrongs of your evil purple ways!"
After a long fight Purple the Villain was defeated and transported to his purple jail. Before walking in, he looked at Purple the Purple PPD officer holding jail cell door who said...
"In-di-go then"
@SteelRat; @SteelRat2
"Angelina my love, I'm a genius!"
"Of course you are darling, that's why I married you. Physically, you're rather unattractive"
http://faces.cohtitan.com/profile/SteelRat
How do you kill a Cadaver?
Stick two straws up its nose and suck til its head caves in.
[ QUOTE ]
How do you kill a Cadaver?
Stick two straws up its nose and suck til its head caves in.
[/ QUOTE ]
eew.
Necrobond - 50 BS/Inv Scrapper made in I1
Rickar - 50 Bots/FF Mastermind
Anti-Muon - 42 Warshade
Ivory Sicarius - 45 Crab Spider
Aber ja, nat�rlich Hans nass ist, er steht unter einem Wasserfall.
Statesman walks into a bar. He sees Synapse drinking beer. Statesman asks Synapse "What are you doing?" and Synapse replies "I...ish...Sinapse...greatesht...hewo...eva... ".
Statesman realises he's drunk. Statesman shouts "Oh you didn't! You know that destroys the Freedom Phalanx's public reputation!"
Statesman calls a police officer over and the officer takes out the breathlyzer. It reads 0.0. Statesman says "How can this be!?"
Synapse takes off his mask to reveal a normal male citizen and says "Tonight, Mr. Statesman, I'm the designated decoy."
------------------------------------------------------------
A man called Marcus is at a party. He says to a drunk man "Hey, I can fly, look" and jumps off the tall building where the party is held and flies. He comes back into the building and the drunk is astounded. Marcus says "You try it.", the drunk man jumps, falls off the building, and dies.
A woman then shouts "Statesman! You wouldn't!"
------------------------------------------------------------
Two men called Mark and Spencer walk across the street. Where do they go?
Marks and Spencers. 
[ QUOTE ]
I played water polo the other day..
It was terrible...
My horse drowned...
[/ QUOTE ]
Horses can swim quite well
@Golden Girl
City of Heroes comics and artwork
[ QUOTE ]
Horses can swim quite well
[/ QUOTE ]
Not when they've got a fat nerd weighing them down.
Chairman of the Charity of Pain; accepting donations of blood and guts.
Prophet of the Creamy Truth; "If it's empty, fill it with cream."
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Horses can swim quite well
[/ QUOTE ]
Not when they've got a fat nerd weighing them down.
[/ QUOTE ]
A big horse could
@Golden Girl
City of Heroes comics and artwork
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Horses can swim quite well
[/ QUOTE ]
Not when they've got a fat nerd weighing them down.
[/ QUOTE ]
A big horse could
[/ QUOTE ]
Relative to the fatness of the nerd I guess
Thelonious Monk
[ QUOTE ]
When he dies, he'll be laid to rest in a Nemesis Plot
/em getcoat 
[/ QUOTE ]
Am I missing something?
[url=http://vox-doom.deviantart.com]Take A Gander At This.[/url]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Horses can swim quite well
[/ QUOTE ]
Not when they've got a fat nerd weighing them down.
[/ QUOTE ]
Calling me fat?
My horse has problems swimming in our pool, so I usually order dead sea salt alongside the chlorine, cork his nostrils and put arm bands on his legs, he loves it! - look, the small matter of floatation and that he is stable is the mane priority.
I would say something about the nerd comment, but I don't want to stirrup any trouble.
[ QUOTE ]
Dr Vazhilok's Favourite Song:
"Leprosy, I'm not half the man I used to be,
Bits keep falling off of me,
Since I went down,
With Leprosy
Why I lost my toe I don't know
It wouldn't stay.
I lost something long,
Now it's gone,
to Leprosy
[/ QUOTE ]
LOLOLOLOL