Pro Payne: From 1 to 50 in M.A. (suggest arcs!)

Pro Payne is closed to suggestions. After today’s post, only the Galactic Protectorate arcs are still slated for reviews, so it won’t be long before I open the thread up to suggestions again.

Pro Payne has been playing through the 2009 Player’s Choice Awards: I don’t want to cast votes except in categories where I’ve played more than two of the arcs, and my strong preference is to play all of the arcs in a category before voting. For the record, I do intend to post the same “mini-reviews” I’ll be posting for the random search arcs I’ve been playing while working through the backlog of requests: just the rating and a brief summary as opposed to the full reviews.

So on to today’s review:

A Sleeping Star (Arc ID#53951, 5 stars)

Pro Payne was waiting to get on the tram when he was approached by a young girl named Leese, who had an odd request, albeit one appropriate to a hero. Her friend, Alice, was supposed to meet her, but hadn’t shown up, and she was worried. Pro Payne set out to investigate – and quickly found he wasn’t the only one looking for Alice. The Crey were also looking for her, but even more ominous was the Void Slayer. Now what would a Void Slayer want with an innocent young girl? Something very bad was in the offing.

Compounding the “something strange is going on” feeling was the fact that Pro Payne actually found Leese doing a ‘field investigation’ of her own. Apparently the young girl had superpowers, and still felt the need to recruit extra help in finding her friend. Pro Payne would soon find that Leese’s decision to seek help was a wise one…

Fortunately, Pro Payne found Alice’s address, and found Alice’s diary – which he gave to Leese to read through for any clues as to what exactly Alice might have stumbled upon (Pro Payne doesn’t like to rifle through young girls’ diaries). The diary hinted at Alice having found something in a nearby wood. Pro Payne went to investigate, and found the Council already there, scouring the place for something. On closer inspection, it was actually primarily the Galaxy branch of the Council involved in the search (lead by a nictus in Black Dwarf form): Pro Payne was beginning to get an idea on what Alice had found out here. His fears grew when he recovered a strange white crystal that the nictus had found in these woods – a crystal the Peacebringer Sunstorm confirmed was the fragment of a destroyed Kheldian colony ship. Either Alice was safeguarding a Kheldian, or had actually bonded with (or been possessed by) one – either way she was now of great interest to the Council, and that couldn’t be good.

Pro Payne quickly went to investigate the Council base where the forest search parties had originated from, and his efforts were quickly rewarded. After defeating an Archon Fellows, he found an after action report that confirmed the Council had kidnapped Alice after learning she was bonded with a Kheldian. He also learned where the Council was keeping Alice.

Leese was all to eager to help Pro Payne and Sunstorm raid the Council base where Alice was held; to help protect the young hero, Sunstorm lied, claiming there were two Council bases listed as possible holding sites for Alice in Fellow’s report. Leese would investigate the first one (which Sunstorm knew to be abandoned), and Pro Payne and Sunstorm would investigate the second. Pro Payne got to the Council base, but he was already too late: the 5th Column had completed a raid on the Council. They’d acquired Alice, leaving behind a very upset Arakhn, who had been masterminding the Council operation. The Arch Villain was keen to take out her frustrations on Pro Payne – fortunately Pro Payne was feeling awfully inspired that day, and managed to fight off his attacker and extract the final pieces of the puzzle in the process:

Alice had bonded with a Kheldian, but it had been an act of desperation on the part of the alien being – a last ditch attempt to survive the destruction of its Colony Ship. The Kheldian was comatose, but Alice had access to its powers. When 5th Column spies in the Council had caught wind of their “special” prisoner, they realized that they might be able to learn from Alice how to force a Kheldian into a host while keeping it comatose, but allowing the host full access to the Kheldian’s suite of powers.

The bad news quickly got worse. Leese, like most heroes, had a Mediport device that would teleport her to safety if she was grievously injured. Pro Payne got a call from Medipatch (who was monitoring Leese’s vital signs should she need to be teleported to safety) – Leese had just taken serious injuries, but the teleport was being blocked! Sunstorm quickly realized that the abandoned base Leese had been sent to was actually the staging point of the 5th Column operation.

Pro Payne rushed to the 5th Column base, rescuing both Leese (and making sure she was teleported to safety) and Alice. The latter was quite the challenge, as the Council itself hit the base with a recovery operation (spearheaded by a very irate Arakhn) – so Pro Payne and Alice had to fight their way through a phalanx of Council nicti, and an Arch Villain eager for a rematch, to escape the base safely.

In the end, both Alice and Leese were safe, and the Council and the 5th Column had been denied their prize.

Pros: I probably don’t say this enough (as this isn’t certainly the only arc where this has applied), but I did appreciate the writing quality that went into this arc – the language, spelling, and grammar were very well polished. I’ve played many arcs that could have put a lot more effort into that. The mission design was also very good: the missions were, overall, interesting, and the pacing was good. While the story didn’t exactly blow me away (although I’d be at a loss to explain why), I certainly enjoyed it and it kept my interest throughout the arc. The arc was well done, and plenty of fun to play.

Cons: Really just a few technical things: in the fourth mission, Sunstorm didn’t seem to have any actual dialog. He just said “I” when I rescued him. In the setup for the last mission (as indicated in the story above) I was contacted by “Medipatch” (via my cell phone, according to the story) with information that Leese was in trouble. I actually found myself wondering how the heck they knew to contact *me* … perhaps having Sunstorm mention right before mission four that he’s requested that the Mediport system actually alert me if something happens to Leese (just to be on the safe side) would make that call seem less ‘out of the blue’ – although, honestly, just having them call Sunstorm instead of me would work too: Sunstorm could easily say something like “Oh no – I told Mediport to call me if anything happened to Leese, just to be on the safe side, and I just got the call nobody wants to get…” (or something like that).

A very good and enjoyable arc overall!

For next time: Pro Payne begins the Galactic Protectorate series of arcs (well, at least I post the review of the first arc in the series) – these will be somewhat shorter (in part because the arcs are themselves shorter), and I’ll also start posting the mini reviews of the random arcs Pro Payne has been trying out in the downtime between playing the GP arcs…

I've been waiting patiently for you to open submissions again, since you're about at the right level for my heroic arc and my new Drakule arc. Well, and the heroic arc I've been working on for some time, but I have no idea when I'll finish that one.

It’s time for the next “episode” in Pro Payne’s ongoing struggle to reach level 50 in Mission Architect!

The Galactic Protectorate (Arc ID#47143, 5 stars)

While Pro Payne was contemplating the next simulation he was going to load into the A.E. computers, he detected a strange signal coming through the console. From what he could determine, it was some sort of communications signal, and, after he spent a few seconds fiddling with the controls, the Holographic Contact “materialized” into an image of the hero Synapse. “Synapse” claimed to be from an alternate version of Earth, and had established a link to the A.E. systems in this dimension. He also claimed that the Earth was suffering under the occupation of a powerful extraterrestrial invasion force, and very few of its heroes remained free to resist. In a last ditch effort to find help, Synapse was attempting to establish contact with other, parallel worlds in the hope that he could find heroes there willing to help.

Pro Payne wasn’t sure he could trust this Synapse from an alternate Earth, but he was certainly willing to see how dire Synapse’s need for help really was. [Note: For this and the remaining arcs in this series Pro Payne used his normal fire-based powers since these were MA missions, even though according to the mission set up he technically should have been using his alternate no “superpowers” build.]

Synapse claimed that he had modified the portal technology on his world to make a direct link to MA’s data column – Pro Payne could now use it to transport to key locations in alternate Synapse’s version of Earth. Synapse first planned to send Pro Payne to Atlas Park to rescue some captives held by the Galactic Protectorate soldiers. Some of the captives were resistance fighters and sympathizers while others had little interest in joining the resistance, but were still being detained by the GP’s troops. The biggest surprise was the fact that Atlas Park had been all but destroyed in the occupation – and there was no doubt that the GP troops were hostile to Earth’s heroes. Although Pro Payne’s suspicions were not completely alleviated (Synapse did seem to say a few things that made a red flag go up for Pro Payne, making him wonder if he was being manipulated, or at least not given the whole story), it was clear that this alternate Earth *was* under alien occupation, and in desperate need of heroes. Pro Payne was committed to helping.

Next, Synapse reported that the resistance had located a communications hub where Pro Payne could likely learn some valuable intelligence about the Protectorate – anything would be useful in fighting Earth’s occupation. The excursion was more successful than Pro Payne and Synapse could have imagined. First, Pro Payne learned the protectorate army was divided into 13 divisions (0 through 12); the overall leader was a Lord Cosmic, and the remaining divisions were led by powerful generals. The Earth had been occupied in a pre-emptive strike, and Statesman had offered to negotiate a peace and represent Earth in something called “Planetary Judgement” – he had never returned to Earth, and it was his absence that prompted the resistance to take action. But it was a losing battle. Most of Earth’s heroes had been captured or killed in battles with Protectorate troops. And it was in the communications hub that Pro Payne learned where Manticore was being held. Manticore was one of the captured heroes, and a leader of the resistance. His capture had been a major blow to the resistance, and he was slated for execution.

Pro Payne quickly traveled to the base where Manticore was being held. Synapse had a clever plan: this base was where Manticore was to be executed, so Pro Payne’s task was to rescue him, defeat the base’s leader, and then file a falsified report that Manticore had been executed to put him off the radar. The plan worked perfectly – Manticore was back among the resistance fighters, and the humans had won the first major struggle against the Galactic Protectorate in a long time. But the work was far from over – it would take an effort of epic proportions to free this alternate Earth from the Protectorate’s thumb.

Pros: The arc features a fresh and distinctive custom enemy group with well balanced powers (with a minor exception listed below) and very interesting descriptions. Kudos to the author for keeping the arc to three missions – it certainly helped to keep the custom group from getting boring, given that they are the main foes in every mention. In spite of the slight feeling that there is a lack of closure, the arc itself does a good job of being self-contained. The mission design and pacing was very well done: I found the missions interesting and fun to play. The fact that I was never bored while playing the arc, and did want to see more by the end means (to me) that the author has done a very good job with the design and story of the arc. But here’s the main reason I liked this arc (and its sequels) – this is one of the first arcs I’ve played that attempts to create an alternate world to ‘explore’ the story of over a series of very digestible episodes. I’ve been looking forward to something like this (I seem to be one of the rare players here that actually rather enjoy epic stories that span over a very large number of missions), because it’s actually giving Pro Payne something that is notably missing in MA: a sense of continuity in the story lines (the Drakule series is the only other arc series that comes to mind that offers a similar sense of continuity, which is one of the many reasons I like it so much: both arcs are among the few MA offerings that actually help make an all MA character feel like they are part of a larger story). There *is* a definite campiness to the Galactic Protectorate series – in my opinion though it is slight enough to actually be charming, and has actually increased the enjoyment of the arcs for me.

Cons: Like I mentioned above, there is a slight lack of closure – often a symptom of arcs that are telling a larger story over the course of a “campaign.” But if you aren’t intending to play the other arcs in the series, and many players in MA (and on this forum) have flat out said that they don’t like playing “series” arcs, then this lack of complete closure may be a detriment. Although I did very much enjoy the custom group, I did have two nits to pick: the level of healing in the group seemed just a tad excessive (something, by the way, that I haven’t noticed with the different divisions in the later arcs) – and I did find myself wondering if GP division 0 was an all-female division for some reason; certainly nothing was mentioned in the arc. (There might have been a male lt. in the faction – I don’t remember for sure – but it was a case where I got the definite sense that the whole division was nearly all female.) That the division was all female (or perhaps spawned that way) didn’t bother me in the least, but it was noticeable enough that it did seem odd that there was no explanation or even mention of it in the context of the arc.

As per the author’s request, Pro Payne didn’t play the arcs back to back – instead he filled the time between the arcs with random searches; something he’s been wanted to do for a while just to see what he could find and how well it worked. Plus, at Pro Payne’s current level, an entire arc often amounts to less than a bubble of XP, so adding (non-farm) “fillers” that will only get very short reviews has an advantage. Finally, I do find random searches to provide a useful context even for considering ratings I give arcs. Whenever I wonder if I’m just being “too easy” by giving nearly every suggested arc a “good to excellent” grade (mostly 4 or 5 stars, with some 3’s thrown in there for otherwise good arcs that really could use some spit and polish), I play random arcs to remind me of what a 1 or 2 star arc really is. It’s kind of sad that that ends up being the case, but it is fun to randomly stumble across a good arc that wasn’t on the suggestion list two – even if it still seems to be a pretty rare occurance.

So without further ado, Pro Payne’s mini-reviews.

While waiting for the next contact from the alternate Earth, Pro Payne occupied his time by attempting a purely random search (no parameters for this round) in A.E.

Something Stinks (Arc ID#112877, 2 stars)

In this adventure, Pro Payne found himself investigating a stench in the sewers. A strawberry stench. ‘Cause, you know, strawberries smell … bad. Huh. Turns out that the whole thing was a combined Freakshow / Council / Snake plot to make a sewer purifier with mutagenic properties.

Pros: The missions were short and easy to complete.

Cons: There was a surprised timed mission and an utterly pointless kill all. The Snakes in the last mission were spawning grays mixed in with the on-level stuff. Very poor English – not much evidence of proofreading.

Next…

Attack of teh fluffies (Arc ID#153802, 1 star)

Some little girl’s stuffed animals and become animate, and were attacking. Pro Payne needed to stop it. After a series of protracted battles against some decidedly non stuffed animal looking mobs and their evil stuffed animal leaders, Pro Payne found himself pitted against “Teh Snugglies” – the master stuffed animal. Apparently millions of years of stuffed animal evolution had made “snugglyness” a synonym for “summons a horde of robots and is wreathed in auras of fire.” Okay. Needless to say as [bleep] near every [bleeping] fire defense power was selected, that snuggly little [bleep] wiped the floor with me repeatedly, without me able to put nary a dent in its life (well, really I was able to, but a burst of healing flames every minute or so made sure that the jerk could heal up in the minute or so it took for me to get back to him after rezzing in the hospital). I didn’t stick around long enough to see if the snuggle monster had Rise of the Pheonix too (as I’d already used time more than once to no real effect). Pro Payne had to ultimately admit defeat in the face of the overwhelming snugglyness of fire and laser blasting robots.

Pros: Actually, the dialog of the little girl who kept sending me after her animated stuffed animals was kinda funny.

Cons: None of the custom mobs (which were all that were in the mission) had any descriptions, except for the bosses, who had a credit for whichever player had designed the costume. Of course, this also led to there being no real rhyme or reason behind why the stuffed animals had the powers they did (yeah, when I see stuffed dogs, I think “hey, if stuffed dogs ever animated and wanted to take over the Earth, they’d have cold powers.”) Actual mission objects were not present, especially for collections. And, of course, the aforementioned robot-summoning, 90% fire resistance with a heal elite boss lord of all snuggles who did such a great job of introducing Pro Payne to the joys of hugging the floor.

Oh! According to the A.E. terminal, Pro Payne is getting a communiqué from Manticore on alternate Earth! Thank goodness!

(Next Wednesday: the next arc in the GP series, and more random whackiness - misspelling intentional).

Thank you for the detailed review of my first arc, Coulomb2!

To be honest, I know my arcs are challenging enough without having to further handicap yourself by using a "No-Powers" concept build, so it's good to know you used your "Super Build" for my arcs. In fact, you could even justify it in-character wise, with something along the lines of:

"Because the heroes are bringing Pro Payne into their universe through the MA System, a few 'wires' get crossed in Pro Payne's molecular structure whenever he 'hops' dimensions, giving him 'real' superpowers when he's in the GP Universe, but not when he's in the CoH Universe."

Or something like that, it's up to you, of course

I'm looking forward to your reviews of the rest of my arcs!

Pro Payne’s adventures thus far have gotten him to level 43 (as of Monday). He’s still playing through Player’s Choice arcs for the moment, and will go back to random arcs once the contest is over.

Pro Payne is still closed to submissions, but getting closer and closer to being open again: after today, he’s got only three more reviews to post.

Also: There is a chance Friday’s post will either be very delayed, appearing late Friday night (most likely) or I’ll be forced to skip the normal post and wait for Wednesday (not as likely, but possible) – I’ve got an observing run this weekend, and it’s iffy if I’ll be able to find time to write a review.

After recovering from his rather bad experience involving a flame-enshrouded stuffed animal, it was time for Pro Payne to return once again to that alternate Earth occupied by the Galactic Protectorate.

The Galactic Protectorate – 02 (Arc ID#117281, 4 stars, 5 given in game)

Pro Payne was contacted by Manticore, whom he had rescued at the conclusion of the previous arc. Manticore had decided that the best way to strike a blow against the Galactic Protectorate was to take out one of the generals commanding an occupying division. A research lab that had been abandoned by the protectorate seemed a good place to start, but the lab turned out to be not quite as abandoned as expected. Not only was it occupied by members of the GP’s 12th division (I think it was the 12th division, didn’t take that note down), Pro Payne found clues that the division was up to something big. Whatever it was, it was being overseen by two high ranking GP officers (Col. Armalad, and Col. Grandel), but Pro Payne had arrived at the research lab too late – most of the GP equipment (and the two colonels) had been transferred to a warehouse nearby for whatever the next phase of the plan was.

More information was needed, and the logical choice was to investigate the warehouse next. Unfortunately, Synapse had decided to head there before Pro Payne, and would need rescuing – but while at the warehouse Pro Payne found out what the 12th division was up to: they were overseeing the transfer of a very high ranking prisoner: Sister Psyche! And General Guinevere herself (commander of the 12th division) was personally overseeing the transfer! It appeared that Pro Payne would be able to win two major victories in one fell swoop: rescue an important member of the resistance, and take out the 12th division’s commander.

Pro Payne and Manticore raced to the outdoor area where Sister Psyche was being held by the general – presumably they were waiting for a transport that would take their prisoner to her final destination (perhaps off planet?) Once the rescue was complete, Pro Payne faced General Guinevere directly in combat. It was a very tough battle, but Pro Payne prevailed. Things were really beginning to look up for the resistance – now renamed the Pro Payne Freedom Fighters in honor of all Pro Payne had accomplished to help this alternate Earth in its struggle to through off the shackles of the Galactic Protectorate.

Pros: The mission briefings and mission design are solid, as is the story, and, at three missions long, the arc’s length is very reasonable – I’m finding that it is fairly easy to maintain interest when the arc isn’t particularly long. This arc features a new set of customs (the troops of the 12th division are quite different from the ones in the previous arc), which is a very welcome change, since fighting the same foes over a very large number of arcs would get very dull, especially when you consider that the custom group is the main enemy group for all missions in the arc. As before, the design and look of the customs, along with their descriptions, are very well done. Overall, this arc is a good, solid effort.

Cons: So why an official rating of 4 stars rather than 5 (although still 5 stars were given in game)? There is a tendency for this particular arc in the series to be “more of the same” – the story is very similar to the first arc, without the need for an introduction but with the addition of a “big bad” to fight at the end. Unlike some of the later arcs, this arc doesn’t seem to (again, if memory serves) develop the Galactic Protectorate much (something that picks up in later arcs), and doesn’t explore other aspects of the struggle (as the next arc does). Also, I do remember that while playing the first mission, I wasn’t as clear on why the Protectorate troops were there as I thought I should be – I’m really trying to go from memory on this, but it was almost as if the mission briefing was setting me up to be surprised to find Protectorate troops in the base, but while I was playing the mission, I kind of remember the mission playing like it wasn’t a surprise at all they were there (e.g. as though my character knew why they were there, but nobody had told me, the player). I wish I could give more specific feedback, but my notes just aren’t detailed enough.

While the newly christened Pro Payne Freedom Fighters were organizing their next move, back on Primal Earth, Pro Payne was searching for more M.A. Scenarios. He started with a random search and found:

Robotic Scavenger Hunt (Arc ID#227138, 2 stars)

Evidently, I had decided I wanted to build a robot – no idea why. But by gosh my contact was going to help me in my robot building aspirations. Since I don’t just walk around carrying robot components (well, I *do* given all of my tech salvage, but we’ll ignore that for now), I was going to need to hit several villain groups to take the components that I needed. Oh, and apparently I’m going to need to beat up on the Paragon Police to get the capacitor that I need. (At this point I double checked the arc to make sure that it really was marked heroic – which it was. Huh.) To make a long story short, I stole everything I needed, and my contact then helped me build the robot.

Next was a directed search: wanted to try a Short or Medium story that was flagged as Solo, Canon-Related, and a Drama, and on level. No hits. Tried changing Drama to Mystery. No hits. Changed Mystery to Horror, and got:

Still Here… (Arc ID#300007, 2 stars)

Pro Payne was sent to recover an artifact in a ruined building in the Hollows. The building was inhabited by ghosts, and the artifact turned out to be five “bags” (which didn’t actually look like bags). Each bag shouted boo at me. The building led to an underground series of tunnels, where I found a ghost. Apparently he was the remains of a scientist that had been doing some sort of Rikti-related research here, and had been left behind when the Hollowing occurred. He died, and was still very mad about it. So Pro Payne put him to rest.

It was at about that time that Pro Payne’s communicator started signaling. Time once again to help out humanity’s struggle against the Galactic Protectorate.

Update: Obviously the weekend at the observatory proved to be far too busy for me to make my normal Friday post. But on the up side I actually got to look through an 82-inch telescope (I was on another 'scope but they had a tour group coming through and had put an eyepiece on the 82 inch, so we sneaked a peek between targets for the tour group - it was spectacular!).

Busy day today, so this one'll have to be on the shorter side (time wise - I can probably still get quite a bit written in the time I have allotted).

Pro Payne is still closed to submissions, but with only two reviews to go after today it'll be no later than next week when I open it up again!

The Galactic Protectorate - 03 (Arc ID#174352, 5 stars)

This time it was Sister Psyche contacting Pro Payne with an urgent request in the ongoing struggle between humanity and the Galactic Protectorate. His mission was to raid a Protectorate hospital and rescue some captive physicians: from the get go this mission was making Pro Payne more uneasy than the more military-style engagements he'd been involved in previously. The 'captives' were acting more like I was taking them prisoner, and were certainly not friendly to the resistance. What's worse, the rumor was that it was actually the heroes of Earth that had started the war - at least that's what the Base Commander (which Pro Payne defeated) and the "rescued" hospital staff seemed to believe. Yes, in war there are always collaborators - but the seed of doubt was planted: Pro Payne certainly was wondering if he was really getting the full story. On the other hand, medical personnel sometimes opt to side and sympathize with those they are treating, and be antagonistic to whomever they perceive as the aggressor sending in more wounded (or dead) to treat. Pro Payne wasn't about to abandon his allies, but he did feel like it was time to look for whatever clues he could about what, if anything, they weren't telling him.

The next task was to siege the command center the hospital commander had alluded to - the target was Gen. Sahara, whose division had been manning and acting as protection for the medical operations seeking to put Protectorate troops back in the fight. While it was unlikely the General was actually at the command center, Pro Payne would likely find clues as to her (or was the General male - I can't remember...) location, and the command center was manned by the General's two chief subordinates: Colonel Gobi and Colonel Mojave. Pro Payne defeated the colonels (no doubt giving Sahara ample reason to seek him out anyway), and acquired the General's location. But he also found evidence in the Protectorate's files that the GP saw humans and humanity's heroes as a brutal foe. Was this more evidence that we had been the original aggressors, or the propaganda of a foe angered by the fact that we hadn't just folded and accepted occupation as a fact of life? Although Pro Payne was increasingly sure he didn't have the whole story, the GP seeing its enemy as 'brutal' certainly didn't prove anything.

General Sahara did in fact make the first move: in retaliation for the hospital raid and the raid on the command center, she was leading a pre-emptive strike against several resistance bases - and word was she had an important prisoner with her. Sister Psyche had already gone into the fray (and needed to be rescued), and Pro Payne was able to find and rescue the other prisoner as well (Ms. Liberty). General Sahara's defeat ended the Protectorate assault: another major victory for the resistance.

But Pro Payne was left wondering if he was helping an (alternate) Earth fight off an unprovoked occupation (as the resistance claimed), or was he helping Earth clean up a mess they'd gotten themselves into when the GP made first contact? Pro Payne had no intention of switching sides, and certainly believed Earth deserved its freedom no matter the reason for the occupation - but perhaps the motives of his allies were not quite as noble as he'd been first led to believe.

Pros: Not much extra to say here - another well done installment in the series. As always, the custom group featured in the arc was interesting (and had great descriptions), and the 3 mission format continues to present the series in an easily digestible format. I found the story more engaging than the previous arc as it did a better job of developing the ongoing story. Overall a solid arc and I'm continuing to enjoy the series.

Cons: A few minor "logical" errors - most notable being the names of the colonels and generals. On one had, I liked that they were united with a "theme", but I have to admit it did strike me as odd they were named after Earth deserts - why would an alien invasion force be named for geographical regions on our planet? Granted, that's a minor thing for me (I do honestly think some reviewers get a little too bent out of shape about stuff like that, but that's just my opinion, and it didn't bother me enough to really detract from my enjoyment of the story). While I did find the added background information and story development did help maintain the "freshness" of the arc - it hasn't escaped my notice that the overall format of the arc remains the same ('intro mission', 'find information on next division general', 'defeat general and rescue next member of the hero resistance'). I want to make it clear that I'm certainly not bored with the format (the new enemy group and the story development are, at the moment, serving as good diversions), I do think the stakes of each 'reveal' and the progress of the story will need to accelerate if the overall mission structure (good that it is) isn't going to become repetitive. (And yes, the suggestion to *not* play these arcs back to back is helping here as well.)

And speaking of 'intermissions', Pro Payne took the chance to start playing the guest arcs:

Mission Awesome (3 stars plus change, 4 stars given in game)
Pros: From a technical standpoint, I thought the missions worked just fine - good briefings, good mission design. It may surprise some (who really didn't seem to like these arcs) that I'd give it such a high score, but taken in context with many of the other arcs I've played (via random searches) this one *is* better. (I enjoyed it more than I would have enjoyed playing nothing but paper missions, which is my general standard for 3 stars - provided there are no obvious errors in the mission, and it certainly wasn't the flawed stuff I've found in random searches that I gave 1 or 2 stars to)
Cons: Again, only kept my attention just a little better than a series of newspaper missions would - although the mission design was obviously more complex. I was expecting the story to be funnier, to be honest. While others have complained about the custom mobs, I didn't have any issues with them.

The Great Face Off! (4 stars, 5 stars given in game)
Pros: Funnier than the previous entry (although still not quite as funny as I was hoping for). It did do a better job of keeping my interest. It seemed to have a better story and better mission design overall...
Cons: Although not by a huge margin.

For Friday: the next two guest arcs, and arc #4 in the GP series.

Pro Payne is just barely level 44 (and having some fun with his new Melt Armor power). Fun fact: he checked his MA account just a few minutes ago, and was able to determine that over his career (as, um, a wannabe crime fighter) he has played through 162 MA story arcs. There do appear to be a larger fraction of arcs with 4 to 5 missions than 1 to 2, so even using a conservative estimate of 3.5 missions per arc, I'd estimate Pro Payne has played through a total of about 570 missions total in M.A. (compare to the 42 he has played outside of MA - and those were nothing but the newspaper and safeguard missions that gave him the safeguard temp powers).

Only one more review to go after today's - so for those of you who want to recommend arcs for Pro Payne to play, mark your calendars: Pro Payne will be accepting arc suggestions after posting the last review in his queue, which will occur next Wednesday, Nov. 18th.

While he was waiting for Ms. Liberty (of GP alternate Earth) to call, Pro Payne busied himself with the remaining two guest author arcs.

OMG it' the LOLBAT (5 stars)
Frankly, in spite of the prejudice this arc was garnering based on its title (and I use the word in its literal sense of people passing judgement before playing the arc), I actually enjoyed this arc: clever foes, a decent (if not stellar) plot, and good writing overall.

Quest for Magic (5 stars)
My opinions of this arc pretty much matched several others who had posted theirs - good writing and a good story (albeit one with a very predictable twist at the end).

Ah! Pro Payne was receiving a call from Ms. Liberty ... time for:

The Galactic Protectorate - 04 (Arc ID#269714, 5 stars)

As the resistance was growing in strength (aided by the help Pro Payne was providing), the assaults on Protectorate forces were becoming increasingly direct; Ms. Liberty wanted Pro Payne to investigate a nearby cave where GP forces had been spotted. Interestingly, the GP division Pro Payne found himself facing were very, well "green" - literally environmentally conscious and making ample use of alternative energies, such as a solar powered computer Pro Payne lifted information from. He learned a few interesting tidbits about the GP armies: evidently one of the most valuable worlds in the Protectorate is called Eden, and its natives, a race calling themselves the Lilans, form the backbone of the Protectorate's military divisions. This was particularly obvious in the division troops Pro Payne was now facing. But Pro Payne also found it interesting that the division was further bolstered by troops that were essentially carefully engineered 'plant troops' based on a heavily modified synthesis of animal and plant DNA from species native to Eden. Apparently a high level Colonel in this division was an expert in plant genetics and physiology and was seeking to greatly swell the ranks of the Protectorate's armies with engineered troops drawn from Eden's ample flora.

While in the cave Pro Payne found references to a Rendezvous point Wolfsbane, where the Colonel in charge of the plant research (Colonel Belladonna) was persuing her research projects while also transferring a high profile prisoner (Swan) into the custody of the division's general (General Adonis). Pro Payne was too late to stop the prisoner transfer, but did face and defeat Colonel Belladonna, capturing her for the resistance. He also learned where General Adonis could be found, and that the General had not only taken a plant from the Circle of Thorns that Col. Belladonna was studying, but was also using the Colonel's greatest creation, a being known as Camellia, as a bodyguard.

Pro Payne assaulted Adonis' stronghold at Ms. Liberty's request - first meeting with Ms. Liberty to get both military aid, and intelligence on the base, and then defeating both the General and his bodyguard Camellia in his bid to rescue Swan from Protectorate imprisonment.

It was time to return home, while the resistance gathered its forces and plotted its next move.

Pros: Although I can't put my finger on it, I honestly really enjoyed the custom enemy group this time around - they've all been good (and a major highlight of these arcs), but, for some reason I thought this one was particularly well done. The writing and mission design for these arcs continues to be solid - and I did think the pacing of the missions was very good this time too. As far as mission length and objectives, everything just felt 'right' in this arc, and the use of optional clues to deliver background information on the GP itself was a good move: it did a lot to keep me both interested in both the arc, and in continuing with the series.

Cons: You know I'm going to say it - "more of the same," although this time around there was enough "differentness" (yeah, I know, not a real word) in the design and concept behind the custom group - and in the background information given - to maintain interest in spite of the fact that you are still following the "search out clues, defeat division general's subordinates, defeat division general and rescue hero" pattern that has dominated the last three arcs of the series. While dropping more tidbits and lore about the GP is helping, I do honestly think it's getting to a point in the series where (1) it's time to at least juggle around the plot a bit. I'm not referring to plot twists - although those can be nice - so much as make changes to the overall 'formula' of the mission structure; the formula has worked so far, but it's going to get stale if things aren't 'shaken up' a bit. Also (2) as a player I'm finding myself wanting to see more direct evidence that our actions are having a significant effect on the GP occupation of Earth: in a way it still feels as though the GP has an iron grip on Earth, in spite of the sequential defeat of several of their occupying divisions - granted, it's just my opinion, but I do think it's time to start seeing free cities and widespread resistance with the GP getting increasingly desperate to put down the growing 'rebellion.' My two cents, as it were.

That's it for this week! Cheers!

With today’s update, Pro Payne has officially posted the last review of the previous round of submitted arcs (and is currently midway through level 44). So without further ado:

Pro Payne is now officially open to suggestions, to feel free to post arcs you’d like for me to play through on this character!

A few “ground rules” (not so much rules as things you might want to know before you suggest an arc):

I’m not quid pro quo. Although I certainly appreciate plays of my arcs, it is not a requirement for me playing your arc and posting a review of it here. My queue of arcs to play is typically in the order they were suggested, but arcs *can* jump the queue at my whim or discretion.

While preference is given to arcs that allow me to remain at my “natural” level, I will certainly play arcs of any level; this preference usually comes into play if my queue has a whole series of “not on my level” arcs in a row. A new suggestion that *is* in my level range might get moved up to the front of my queue just to give me a chance to play at Pro Payne’s native level before going back to being exemplared (or sidekicked up, although I don’t see that as a common issue at Pro Payne’s current level).

Keep in mind that Pro Payne is a fire/fire/fire scrapper, and he always plays solo (bosses are enabled, but AVs are not) – and I do lower ratings for arcs that have a required foe that I cannot defeat. That said, just about the only way I won’t be able to beat a foe is if you’ve got an elite boss class foe with 90% fire resistance and a healing power. While a lot of folks have been leery of Pro Payne ability to handle the challenges in their arcs (and, frankly that’s a reasonable fear, given that Fire is one of the weakest defensive sets), about 90% of the time I actually have very little problem handling and completing an arc. The character’s only consistent Achilles Heel really are powerful foes with massive amounts of fire resistance. And no, I don’t ever have or pick up shivans or Warburg nukes (if you want to know why, see the very first post in this thread).

Finally, in between playing arcs slated for a review, Pro Payne typically plays at least one arc based on random search (I’ll explain this in a later post where I plan to talk in a bit more detail about how I score arcs). If you would simply like your arc to get a play, but are not interested in anything other than in-game feedback and do not want a review, then clearly state that: that almost always ensures your arc will be played the very next time Pro Payne would otherwise do a “random search,” and is a surefire way to jump to a high location in the queue. Note that you must specifically request that you’re not looking for an actual review; even suggestions like “it’s up to you to decide if you’ll review it or not” will automatically get your arc put in the normal review queue.

Okay, and now for the last round of reviews from the old queue (there’s actually quite a few of them).

While waiting for a call from ‘alternate Earth’ Swan, Pro Payne saw fit to do several random searches at the A.E. console, looking for things to occupy his time.

Royal Rumble 2 (Arc ID#163731, 1 star)
“Ryu” told Pro Payne to “get in there and kick some major alien butt.” That was pretty much literally all he said. It turns out that (apparently) Ryu was looking to have Pro Payne enter a rather large underground Rikti base and clear out every alien there. Which he did, and was then rewarded with a very brief “atta boy” and the arc was over. No actual story, no clues, a defeat all on a large map (with no effort to even have the objective as anything other than the default), and nothing else on the map to even make the hunt for every Rikti interesting (no glowies, no boss detail, no nothing). There was literally nothing to grade and no effort put into the arc: the only reason nothing went wrong is because there was no effort to put anything into the arc at all so nothing *could* go wrong…

A Link To The Wild (Arc ID#304244, 2 stars, 3 stars given online)
It’s been long enough since I actually played this arc to remember exactly what it was about, and it gave no souvenir. It didn’t stand out enough for me to think it worth taking plot notes, so my only comments here revolve around other notes that I took down: although I don’t remember the plot I did think it “had a good basic premise that just needed to be developed more.” It had a good custom group, but the briefings and clues needed a fair amount of proofreading, and more effort needed to go into actually typing up mission objectives (rather than letting them remain defaults). Also, the arc should be set to levels 25+, since the custom group *was* strong enough that it would be best to ensure characters playing the arc had access to SOs (I guess 22+ would work too).

Night of a Thousand Nemeses! (Arc ID#202907, 4 stars, 5 stars given online)
I have to admit that when this arc came up, I almost groaned. I don’t like to think that I’m overly judgmental as a player, but even I get a small sense of dread whenever I see a title that makes me think “amateur Nemesis plot attempt.” I was pleasantly surprised! Yes, the story does need some work (especially in the sense that it gets a little overly convoluted – there are some parts where you get the definite “I think I’m *supposed* to know what’s going on here, but I’m not really following the plot that well” feeling. Still, the basic premise was clear enough: Mender Silos has detected a temporal rift (and those are bad, he explains) that could lead to a major universe-destroying time paradox. While investigating Pro Payne actually finds the rifts are being caused by Lady Nemesis, the Turkish Queen of Automatons – an alternate world doppelganger of our very own … well you get the idea. Evidently she’s sending her own followers into our Earth’s past to kidnap a 19th century Prussian private named Reed Slomins. It’s pretty obvious Reed is destined to become our Lord Nemesis (and evidently even his mother had the foresight to give him a name that was an anagram for the villain name he would one day take – although you could argue that it was really ‘Lord Nemesis’ that was the anagram Reed constructed from his own name. Yeah, I didn’t really buy it either…) and kidnapping him to prevent that from happening could cause some major temporal paradoxes. So yes, the story could be stronger (in my opinion), but here’s the thing – it still had some fun ideas, and the mission design, pacing, and clues were quite well done. What’s more, the final mission, filled with a veritable army of ‘alternate Earth Nemeses’ complete with individual bios giving their stories of how they rose to power (or didn’t) in their native worlds was actually very entertaining. I found this arc to be a rare jewel among the random searches, and well worth my time. Well done!

Be the Sidekick! (Arc ID#298348, 1 star, 2 stars given online, for what that’s worth.)
Black Scorpion was trashing Atlas Park, and I had to stop him with Statesman’s help. Upon starting the mission I immediately see the first problem: I cannot possibly save Atlas Park from Black Scorpion’s rampage as apparently he’s already completely trashed the place. Hmm, so the mission is already pointless (and I’m wondering what B.S. is still doing here, considering that there’s just nothing left to destroy). But couple that with the fact that Statesman really wouldn’t need my help to kick the tar out of Black Scorpion, and there’s no point in me doing this mission at all. At least it had more of a plot than “Royal Rumble.”

Pro Payne breathed a sigh of relief: he was getting a message from Swan. Time to go up against the Galactic Protectorate one more time!

The Galactic Protectorate – 05 (Arc ID#304290, 4 stars, 5 stars given in game)

Swan was making no bones about the fact that the resistance’s priority at the moment was just to rescue as many captured Vindicators as possible (hopefully in preparation for a full scale assault on the Protectorate one day soon). Mynx was next on the list, and Swan sent Pro Payne to an abandoned office that the Protectorate troops had set up a base within to look for information. Within Pro Payne found a rather large number of computer files (and defeated the base’s commander), giving him quite a lot of interesting intelligence. First, he found a veritable treasure trove of reference information on the Protectorate’s reasons for occupying Earth: apparently we were perceived as a grave threat at the time the order was given because it was elected for all 12 divisions of the Protectorate to occupy Earth, something that was virtually unheard of in GP politics. Furthermore the invasion was practically ordered by their supreme commander Lord Cosmic, who has the option to circumvent the normal political channels when ordering a planetary occupation. Given that it is a decision he almost never makes, clearly there was something about this Earth that gave him grave concern.

The division Pro Payne was fighting this time were specialists in sonic attack – a direct result of the division leaderships’ great interest in music (both for recreational purposes but also, evidently, as a weapon). In any case, Pro Payne learned the location of the division’s four Colonels and that they would know where the division’s General (who had custody of Mynx) was. The Colonels (Dore, Mifa, Sola, and Tido – heh, cute actually) fell, and gave up the location of General Sonica and Mynx.

Pro Payne quickly tracked down the General, defeating her and rescuing Mynx – but just as he finished he received word that a very large number of resistance outposts had fallen under Protectorate attack! The Galactic Protectorate was finally making a decisive effort to wipe out the growing resistance, once and for all!

Pros: Nice cliffhanger at the ending! As usual, the custom group was well balanced with very good (and interesting) descriptions, and the mission design and pacing was good overall (although I did find the second mission to be more on the long side than I liked – I was hunting the four colonels in a very large, heavily populated outdoor map; it’s hard to give good advice on this: on one hand you can make the argument than it’s easy enough to just scour the map for the four colonels – but on the other hand the fact that there are four colonels means that if you are taking the approach of ‘clear the map until you get bored, and then seek out the remaining objectives’ isn’t quite as fast as you’d like… but don’t get me wrong, I intend it as nothing more than a minor complaint). The extra “backstory” clues were also a nice (and at this point in the story a much-needed) touch.

Cons: It was very hard to decide on an ‘official’ rating for this arc – in part because the author does do what I’ve suggested: there’s more backstory and (like I said, the cliffhanger is nice). But I still found myself very narrowly coming in at a bit under four and a half stars in spite of the positive additions for exactly the reasons you’d probably expect: this arc fundamentally follows exactly the same plot as at least two previous arcs. It’s just my opinion, so take it for what it’s worth, but, as much as I’m actually enjoying the arcs (and I am), I do think it’s time for the story to take a major twist and break from the format of the previous arcs, just to keep things interesting. Fortunately, based on the cliffhanger, it does look like when the next arc comes out the story is going to take a different path than it did in the last few.

And that’s all for this update! On Friday, my post will be aimed at posting all of the quick “mini-reviews” for the Player’s Choice arcs – of course Pro Payne will be collecting and playing through suggestings. I am tentatively planning on posting the first new review based on the suggestions on Monday – a departure from my normal pattern to take into account that I will not have time to post reviews or even really play Pro Payne over the upcoming Thanksgiving holiday.

So, just in case you missed it at the beginning of the thread: Pro Payne is again officially open for suggestions.

"Splintered Shields" (#253991) is 45-50; both "Blowback" (#4643) and "Chains of Blood" (#4829) are 41-50.

Enjoying some free time or just passing through Pocket D. A young man suddenly appears in front of you, violating your personal space badly. You step aside but he follows. "You must help me, Paragon City is in Peril!" He shouts when your second sidestep succeeds. You stop to listen. He rambles an apology for luring you with the PC in danger thing but he truly needs your help.

Ok, the arc is beneath your notice now but with the new Sk rules, you might be tempted to give Love Spurned a try. If only to get rid of that man. Only 3 missions with a flavor tragicomedy.

You are now in the perfect level range to try one (or both, up to you) of my arcs!
Both volumes of the Tales of Cimerora are 41 to 50.
Volume 1 is #12647 and volume 2 is #292389. You can play them in any order or play volume 2 without playing volume 1, they are independant.
I hope you enjoy them!

All of the arcs in my sig are playable at your current level, however I would avoid Trademark Infringement because the boss is a fire tank and would be tough considering your build. Also, In Poor Taste is straight up comedy that is in very poor taste. As such I also recommend against anyone playing it ever.

WN

Thank you for your reviews of all of my arcs, Coulomb2! I'm glad you seemd to enjoy them, for the most part

It's always interesting to see how each reviewer reacts to and interprets the storyline of my arcs, but this was the first time someone did so in-character, so I enjoyed seeing how both you and Pro Payne experienced my arc.

I'm actually almost finished with the next "chapter" of the Galactic Protectorate storyline (this latest arc has been somewhat of a nightmare, mostly because I ran out of file space the first time I tried to design it and then had to basically start from scratch), and you're correct in thinking that it will be quite different from the previous installments. I'm always looking for feedback for my arcs, so I'll probably request another review from you once it's published

In any case, thanks again for reviewing all the arcs I've published thusfar in my "Galactic Protectorate" series; I greatly appreciate the feedback

Pro Payne is open to submissions. His current queue:

1934, 253991, 12647, 292389

(and I'll update on Monday to put in Blowback, and Wrong Number's arcs)

It turned out to be a day where real life got in the way of game play, so this is going to have to be a much shorter update that I originally planned.

While waiting to finish out my last set of reviews Pro Payne played through as many of the Player's Choice arcs as he could (so that I could cast informed votes). Here are a few of the results (I'll talk more about the scoring system I've been using when I get the time).

15+ Minute Tutorial - Knowledge is Power: Architect Entertainment (Arc ID#28470, Score: 5.03, 5 stars)
Exactly what it purports to be: a tutorial on how to build and play your own architect missions. While it isn't any more than that, it does what it does quite well.

Mercytown, the one with the fish (Arc ID#6017, Score: 5.58, 5 stars)
Excellent writing and story - a very well done arc with only a few places where I felt the clues could have done a slightly better job of explaining the story. I found this one to be a fun, top notch arc!

Nuclear 90: the Fuisonette Task Force (Arc ID#58363, Score: 3.75, 4 stars)
The writing was fairly solid overall, if not truly excellent - it could have used some polish in places. Fuisonette didn't quite "sound right", although I'd probably be at a loss to make her sound any more right myself (it's one of those cases where I could tell something was off, but it was hard to tell how to fix it). A few plot issues (like where'd 'Immolation Ken' get the amulet). It wasn't a bad arc, but it could use some improvements.

Day Job Hell was already reviewed earlier in this thread. For what it's worth, it ended up getting a score of 6.0 (I thought it was very well done), and my first place vote.

The Marconeville Horror (Arc ID#178278, Score: 2.96, 3 stars)
Wow - was this arc ever a strange combination of stuff that I really liked and stuff that I really didn't like. The overall story and most of the mission design was very good - and I thought Whitfinger's faction was well done. But, conversely, I just didn't buy that it was the Vahzilok that raised him (that was a big "huh?! really?!" moment for me when I was playing the arc), and the arc had what, for me, is a huge technical error: a required elite boss with 90% fire resistance (in an arc where I'm exemplared down and don't even have all of my attacks). It's always the author's call to put in something like that, but I do think it's a risky move to put in a foe with a very high resist to *any* damage - you never know when you'll get a player playing your arc that that *happens* to be their primary damage type. Yuck. (Plus it really didn't make sense to me in story why he was fire aura - it sometimes seem like people just like to pick that set because it's considered "weak" for a defensive set.)

That's gotta be all for now - more on Monday, along with the promised updates to my queue.

Pro Payne is currently level 44, and is open to submissions. The short version: by default you are asking for a review, unless you specifically state you just want a play through (provided Pro Payne didn’t already play through your arc as part of the Player’s Choice awards, and I *will* entertain requests for more in-depth reviews of those if you want to see more than the ‘short’ review).

A few notes about the “scores” (which are new to the reviews I’m posting here). They are a natural extension of the fact that I noticed there were consistently things that increased an arc’s “running star total” in my head while I was playing through it, and other things that decreased it. As I was playing through the Player’s Choice arcs, I felt I needed something a bit more concrete than a simple “in my head talley” – so I started keeping track of the “standard” stuff that I was noticing in an arc (good or bad); like how well the mission briefings were written, how well the clues were written, the pacing and construction of the missions, etc. Granted, it’s stuff that was always taken into account, but for Player’s choice I was being more quantitative with it.

I doubt there’s much interest in a detailed accounting of the scoring system I’m using, so here’s the Cliff’s Notes version: the default score is 3. The score goes up for stuff that I like. It goes down for stuff I don’t. My “on the forums” star rating is the score rounded normally (e.g. 4.0 to 4.49 would be “4 stars”; 4.5 and up would be “5 stars”). My “in game” star rating is the score rounded up (even 4.01 would get rounded up to “5 stars” for the in-game rating). Oh, and Disclaimer: even though the scoring looks quantitative, I make no claims that it is anything other than completely subjective and based solely on my opinions, so just keep that in mind before reading too much into a score.

Pro Payne’s Current Queue: 1934, 253991, 12647, 292389, 344596, and 4643. I typically insert “random search” arcs in between queue arcs. There are two reasons for this: it will decrease the delay between when I play the arc and post the review, and it helps me keep perspective (frankly, random searches are a really good way, in my opinion, to ‘calibrate’ what a 1 or 2 star arc is *really* like).

The plan is to keep the queue open until I think there are enough in the queue to get Pro Payne to level 50 (taking the aforementioned random searches into account). Of course, at that point, the Pro Payne project will be over (although I would be remiss if I didn’t point out Eva Destruction’s 1 through 50 in MA project as another place to post requests for plays!).

On to the reviews. First, a lot of “short ones” from the Player’s Choice awards (missing arcs from each category are ones that already got plays and reviews earlier in this thread):

In Poor Taste (Arc ID#259920, 5 stars)
Pro Payne was sent against a series of hilariously named villains… comedy ensued! One of the most genuinely funny arcs I’ve played, and one of the only ones that actually had me laughing out loud for real (which is not to say the others weren’t funny – but they tended to be more along the ‘entertained smile’ side of things; except mine. I was laughing out loud for mine too. But then I laugh at my own jokes. Lame, I know…) But I digress. A very funny arc with excellent writing, extremely funny dialog, and just a very funny premise overall. Very well done.
Score: 5.25

Vernon Von Grun’s Extraordinary Extradimensional Excursions (Arc ID#115174, 4 stars, 5 stars given in game)
Pro Payne is hired (or partnered with) by Vernon Von Grun for some “real” extradimensional explorations – not just that sissy stuff Portal Corps sends you on. Certainly a neat concept that, in all honesty, I wanted to see executed a little better: in particular, I thought the arc’s missions needed more of a unifying theme (it felt a lot like random dimensional exploration). The arc’s high point was definitely “universe where Rome never fell” – I thought that was just inspired.
Score: 4.125

Seeking Men (Arc ID#169114, 3 stars, 4 stars given in game)
Pro Payne was fighting off a series of misguided villainous suitors after an unfortunate mix up with a personal add. Again, comedy is certainly subjective – and I have to admit that if it wasn’t one of the Player’s Choice nominees, I probably would have skipped past it on concept. Here’s the deal: I thought this arc needed to go one of three ways it didn’t – either it needed to have warnings and disclaimers that the arc is written for female characters (but appropriate for gay or bisexual male characters), OR it needs to have just as many female suitors as male (to make it work equally for both genders), OR the idea that it was a villain who planted your name in the personals needs to be a much more obvious and integral part of the story (so that if you are playing it as a straight male character, there’s a logical reason for your name to be in the personals ‘seeking men’). On a more technical note: I did notice what appeared to be some sort of ‘interaction error’ in the final mission – mobs fighting each other that didn’t seem like they ought to be fighting each other.
Score: 3.4

A Warrior’s Journey, The Flower Knight Task Force (Arc ID#260284, 5 stars)
Pro Payne, at Flower Knight’s behest, begins the investigation of an alternate Earth dominated by a society reminiscent of feudal Japan. While there, he uncovers a plot masterminded by the Praetorian Chimera, and faces and defeats that world’s equivalent of Arachnos. I have to admit that I started this arc with very little interest in the story line and an attitude that having to play through it was going to be kind of a chore. I should have given the author the benefit of the doubt – while I did feel the arc started out a bit slow, by the end I was sucked into the story and having a really good time! Good job!
Score: 4.68

The Most Important Thing (Arc ID#266877, 4 stars, 5 stars given in game)
Again, just me being honest, but I didn’t think this arc deserved the poor critical reception it got. I enjoyed the overall storyline (even with some caveats), the missions were well put together, the customs were kind of cool (and well balanced, which I always appreciate), and the clues were very well done. Frankly, the biggest mistake the arc made is scripting responses my character was having that actually weren’t how I was responding to the story (which *does* break immersion, and was something I counted off for – but was not something that I felt in any way totally countered everything the arc was doing well, and my scoring system did seem to bear that out). That there *was* a causality loop didn’t bother me, but how it played out was a “huh? Really?” moment (I just didn’t buy that it was Dr. Allbright who accidentally offed his own family while “past Dr. Allbright” remained totally clueless that’s what happened this whole time). But that said, whatever technical issues there were with the plot I felt spent most of the arc staying under what I think of as the “casual play” level. But it’s a moot point, at least as far as this arc goes.
Score: 4.46

Have a Blap, Blap, Blap Happy Day Kids! (Arc ID#2019, 4 stars, 5 stars given in game)
Pro Payne is sent to rescue a kidnapped beloved children’s show star – who turns out to not want a rescue. And is a jerk. Good briefings, good mission design, and a really well done custom group (if giving the pep squad the pink pom-poms of doom wasn’t a deliberate in-joke, it *should* have been!). Honestly, for this arc I didn’t feel as though the arc did anything wrong (unlike many arcs, there were no issues I deducted points for) – for lack of a better way to describe it, it instead felt like the arc just needed “more good” to up its score, and bring it from a good arc to an excellent arc. Granted, I know that’s not terribly helpful, but the problem with Player’s Choice is I didn’t have much time to put a lot of in-depth thought into what could make arcs that I was playing that fell into the “good arc” category into “excellent arcs.”
Score: 4.34

The Fracturing of Time (Arc ID#171031, 4 stars, 5 stars given in game)
Pro Payne is contacted by a civilization on the verge of extinction – he agrees to help them (following their own plan to save themselves, at least ‘after a fashion’). But the plan goes horribly ary, and Pro Payne is blamed by those he saved for their horrible fate. Their revenge: destroy all reality. And Pro Payne had to stop them, even if it meant sacrificing both himself, and destroying the race he’d tried to save. A very well done story arc: good briefings, good mission design, good custom group, and a good story. The story billed itself as sci-fi, surreal, and existential: while I didn’t really find it very “sci-fi”, it certainly seemed surreal and existential. I’d definitely recommend it as a very good arc!
Score: 4.375

One Million Eyes (Arc ID#71933, 5 stars)
Pro Payne must work to save Paragon City from Crey’s newest diabolical plot – all run by the now hopelessly disillusioned and insane Countess Crey from prison. While the treatment of Countess Crey and Malta did seem a little “off” in this arc, it certainly wasn’t enough to keep me from enjoying an excellent story. The writing was very good, and even if the Countess just didn’t seem quite right – the plot was certainly very clever and extremely Crey-esque. An excellent story arc!
Score: 5.375

There are many more of these “short reviews” left to go, but at the moment it’s time for the “main review” for today:

Chains of Blood (Arc ID#4829, 4 stars (very close), 5 stars given in game)

The contact for this arc was Azuria, who had approached Pro Payne with an urgent problem:

Two well known heroes – Venture and Starfall – had run into trouble at the hands of the Circle of Thorns, and needed rescuing. Pro Payne was tapped for the tasks, and headed into Orenbega to rescue the captured heroes. What he found in there was strange, even for the Circle. Not only had the Circle fallen under (a very unsuccessful) attack by the Legacy Chain, the heroes captor turned out to be a higher-up in what appeared to be a splinter faction of the Circle of Thorns known as the “Blood Redeemers.” What they were up to (and what they wanted with the heroes and the Legacy Chain) was not clear, but Thaloquin (the Blood Redeemer who had captured Venture and Starfall) did have a Blood Tome, which could be used to trace lineages.

Actually, Thaloquin’s bio indicated that the Blood Redeemers sought to free the Circle from their contract with the Prince of Demons. But how Venture, Starfall, and the Legacy Chain were going to play into this plot was unknown – and the Legacy Chain was being very closed mouthed about what the Circle’s mages might want with them.

No sooner were Venture and Starfall freed, then a Legacy Chain base came under direct attack by the more of these Circle of Thorns Blood Redeemers. The Blood Redeemers, led by another mage named Esiliaar, were scouring the base looking for records. Pro Payne recovered what the Circle had not already absconded with, and from that learned that it was the lineage of the heroes he had rescued that was of interest to the Circle – they were related by blood to many of the members of the Legacy Chain. Pro Payne got the distinct impression the Chain knew why the Circle might be interested in their heritage, but they still weren’t talking.


Pro Payne battles a Blood Redeemer in a Legacy Chain hideout.

It didn’t matter – Azuria sent Pro Payne back to Orenbega to track down the stolen records. Not only did he find the records, he also fought and defeated a third leader of the Blood Redeemers, Belastios, and rescued one of the highest ranking members of the Legacy Chain: the Arch-Tellus Cavanaugh. Cavanaugh had decided the time for silence was over, and told Pro Payne what was going on. According to the Arch-Tellus, the Legacy Chain were originally founded by Orenbegans who had refused to sign the Circle of Thorn’s fatal pact with the Prince of Demons: the pact the Circle had hoped would give them the upper hand in their battle with Mu (and did), but had also (ultimately) condemned them to an eternity of unlife in the sunken halls of their great city when they refused to allow their demonic allies to slaughter the Mu completely.


An (eminently flammable) Blood Redeemer.

Rather than signing the pact, the Orenbegan, named Cinoval, and his followers fled before the contract was established. Cinoval founded an order of disciples who were sworn to stand against all of the dark magics of the world – which, ironically, put them at odds when their own blood: the Orenbegans bound by the pact with the forces of Hell. Thus, the Legacy Chain was born – led by Elder Cinoval for the past 14,000 years.

It was now time for Pro Payne to meet the Elder and get the last peace of the puzzle. It was clear the Blood Redeemers were planning a ritual they hoped would free them from their demonic contract; but how or why this would work (and what they needed the Elder’s blood for) wasn’t entirely clear.

The Circle had attacked the Elder’s sanctuary, but the attack was in vain. Elder Cinoval was more than a match for the Circle attackers; he certainly would not have needed Pro Payne’s help to defeat the leader of the Blood Redeemers, Xanos – and it was only the fact that Pro Payne got to Xanos first that even allowed him to test Xanos’ abilities in combat. From both Xanos and Cinoval Pro Payne learned the details of the Blood Redeemer’s plot: as experts in blood magic, the Redeemers sought to cast a “sympathetic spell” powered by blood sacrified from members of the Legacy Chain – in effect, the spell would give the Circle the freedom from the demons’ pact that the Legacy Chain had enjoyed for the past 14,000 years by virtue of fleeing before the pact became a reality. At last the tortured souls of the Circle of Thorns would be freed without the need to kill every last person with Mu blood on Earth. Presumably they’d be able to live out their lives in peace (in whatever stolen bodies they had).

Cinoval, however, knew the ritual wouldn’t work. And he knew the only way he could *prove* this to the Redeemers was to give them incontrovertible proof that it would fail. He didn’t spell out what he meant by that, but Pro Payne was pretty sure he knew…

Elder Cinoval surrendered himself to the Blood Redeemers of his own free will – and the Redeemers began their ritual on Thorn Isle. Pro Payne rushed to the Rogue Isles to stop them. But, as Cinoval had intended, Pro Payne arrived too late. Cinoval was already dead, and the ritual had been enacted (it doesn’t take long to start a ritual when your sacrifice isn’t even trying to resist). All that remained was to defeat the four leaders of the Blood Redeemers, and the entity the ritual had called up.

Cinoval had known that the Circle’s contract with the demons called for the deaths of anyone with Mu blood – but anyone capable of wielding magic had at least some Mu blood. Hence the contract really called for the deaths of everyone who could wield magic (in addition to anyone else with Mu blood, but that was beside the point) – which meant the contract could never be fulfilled while any magician still lived: Mu, Legacy Chain, or the Circle themselves.

Note: The next two paragraphs are actually not spelled out very well in the arc – this was Pro Payne’s own attempt to understand what was going on, and why the ritual didn’t work.

That was the problem: if the Circle used the ritual to become “alive” again, with the same “status” (regarding the pact with the demons) as the Legacy Chain, they’d never be safe because the demons would now be bound by contract to kill them because they have Mu blood (since, again, everyone who can wield magic does).

Pro Payne groaned inwardly; no doubt some demon from Hell had been called up to gloat that the ritual had not freed the Circle (perhaps unless they were all willing to accept damnation) – all the ritual had accomplished was probably the summoning of a powerful demon that Pro Payne would have to stop from going free into the world to wreak havoc. Heck, that demon might now be proving its point by carving up all of the newly “redeemed” Circle – demonstrating the folly of the ritual by proving to any “saved” Circle that they were now vulnerable to demonic attack as the demons strived to fulfill their end of the bargain. In effect, the one bit of protection they had – the demons weren’t required to kill them because they’re already dead – would be gone the moment they became truly alive again.

Pro Payne was actually rather surprised the ritual called up an Avatar of Hequat, who was making it very clear that the ritual was very crude and had no chance of working. Huh? Hequat? Is the idea that only Hequat has the power to free the Circle from their contract, and there’s no chance in Hell of that happening (pun intended)? Or is she literally just there to gloat? This was the only real problem I had with the arc: everything made perfect sense until Hequat showed up. Why Hequat? I must have missed something…

But, in any case, Pro Payne defeated Hequat and put an end to the Blood Redeemers. While the Legacy Chain lost their oldest and most powerful member, it was now clear to any in the Circle who sought to escape their fate through blood magic that no plan of that nature could ever work. Somehow, though, I doubt even Cinoval’s noble sacrifice is enough to convince them…

Pros: This arc does a lot right – in fact, it does almost everything right. The mission briefings are good, as is the mission design: the pacing for the missions is right on, and the clues are well done. Custom mobs are a very small part of the mission – power wise they are balanced very well (or at least they didn’t give me any problems), even if their appearance isn’t particularly inspired (and, although this is a minor nitpick, they don’t look at that ‘Circle of Thorns-y’ Yeah, that’s a real way something can look.) The ‘apocryphal’ origin of the Legacy Chain is inspired – or at least very believable, and ties in very, very well with the story. A very solid arc.

Cons: As mentioned before, Hequat’s inclusion just didn’t make sense to me, and, worse, actually seemed to call attention to a flaw in the “logic” of the magical ritual that is central to the arc’s plot (since seeing her was such a surprise that I started to really dig into the arc’s plot to try to figure out the “in plot” reason she was there). I was able to see a way that the ritual would backfire on the Circle (they want to become as alive as their Legacy Chain “bretherin” are – but they erroneously think the Chain is immune to reprisals by the demons because they are not of Mu blood, and the demons aren’t contractually bound to kill them all) – although I have no idea if I was right about that; if I am correct, it might improve the arc to spell it out a bit more clearly in the clues. But if that’s true, the Legacy Chain doesn’t actually have any sort of contract with the demons, and the magic carries this over to the Circle of Thorns, when wouldn’t the ritual have “freed” the demons from their obligation to kill the Mu too (since it is, in effect, dissolving the contract)? Now if the ritual was poorly designed (which Hequat hints at) then it was only intended to break the Circle’s side of the contract, but not the demon’s side – but if that’s the case then I think the arc could be improved by more explicitly stating that fact (since the default assumption is all aspects of the contract would be broken, much to the demon’s chagrin since they’d no longer have a ‘legal’ reason to come to this plane and slaughter people). But if that is correct (only the Circle side is broken, which turns out to actually be a very bad thing for the Circle because their side of the contract was actually protecting them, after a fashion), then I still don’t get what Hequat has to do with it? It would seem a lot more fitting for a powerful demon from Hell to show up to lord the Redeemer’s mistake over them by “fulfilling his end of the modified contract” and dutifully killing every last of the newly “saved” Blood Redeemers. Again, unless I’m missing something – but if I am, then my feedback would be to spell out whatever it is I’m missing more clearly in the arc.

Score: 4.445

Due to the holiday, this post will be the last until Wednesday of next week, but feel free to continue to post suggestions here!

Oh hey, glad to hear you enjoyed Mercytown.

I was tempted to give each arc a review too given how I pretty much played all of them, but even if it was just a short review I think it would have ended up being too time consuming for me.

Thanks for the review, and the good marks.

Regarding your confusion, the arc does not claim that anyone with the capability to wield magic has Mu blood. It claims that every human being can be said to have "Mu blood" because all humans -- indeed, all terrestrial life forms -- have common ancestry. The arc asserts that the demons got the better of the Circle (and specifically Akarist) by using the term "Blood of Mu" metaphorically to refer to those capable of using magic. They tricked the Circle into signing its own death warrant. After all, no one beats the devil. The sequel, if I were ever to write it, would have Akarist as the Contact directing the player(s) in an effort to retrieve the original contract so he could prove it was fradulent. The finale (with <REDACTED> as the Contact) would be about, ah, getting the case heard in the relevant court.... In any case, this is why the Redeemers' ritual did not and never can work: they are taking entirely the wrong approach.

The second problem seems to be some confusion about the canonical contract between the Circle and Hell. The demons aren't obligated to kill everyone with Mu blood. They're not obligated to do anything at this point. They've already delivered their end -- they gave the Circle the power to fight back against the Mu. The Circle is obligated to kill everyone with Mu blood as the price for that aid.

Hequat appears because of the failed ritual's references to the Blood of Mu in the sense of her followers. She is a bit of a random event but I felt the arc needed a big finish. The very early versions back in i14's beta used Baphomet; when I found out Hequat was available (under Arachnos for some warped reason) I felt she was a much better fit.

Ah, that does clarify some things. Thank you for the response. And, for what its worth, your ideas for sequels do sound interesting; I'd look forward to playing them if they ever get written.

Pro Payne is currently open to submissions.

Originally I was going to write and post my review for Love Spurned, but my internet went out, and I've literally spent until just a few minutes ago getting it up and running again - and now I'm out of time. Barring another internet disaster like today's, I'll post my review for Love Spurned on Friday.

However, as with my previous review posts, I'd also intended to include a number of 'mini-reviews' from when I was playing through the Player's Choice arcs; I already had them written out (so that I could devote my time this morning to focusing soley on the Love Spurned review; who knew it would end up not helping), so I will post them.

Forget the Rose, send me the Thorns (Arc ID#8925, 5 stars)
Pro Payne helped a Circle of Thorns mage win the heart of his One True Love, a powerful and evil succubus. A very well done, genuinely funny arc. Excellent writing in the mission briefings, great custom mobs, good mission design, and well-written clues. My only gripe was I wanted the second mission to be a bit more “meaningful” (although that mission being ‘generic’ is part of the joke).
Score: 4.875

Becky’s Revenge (Arc ID#60197, 5 stars)
Like OMG! Becky like NEEDs Pro Payne’s help to, like, show her arch-nemesis Fusionette whose boss! Funny stuff, and definitely worth a play (something that, in reality, I can honestly say about nearly all of the player’s choice arcs, so it’s probably a little redundant to keep mentioning it). Good writing in the mission briefings, and good mission design; Becky’s dialog is well done (which, of course, is critical to the arc ‘working’), as is the overall story.
Score: 4.58

Of Sound Mind and Body (Arc ID#13107, 4 stars, 5 stars given in game)
After helping Becky out, Pro Payne was contacted by a lawyer, and embarked on an adventure to “write himself” into the will of a deceased mobster (obviously, a villainous arc). Excellent writing in the mission briefings, good mission design and story (with a good concept backing the story), and well done custom mobs. I thought the pacing of the story was particularly well done for this arc. Its greatest weakness is XP issues: it, unfortunately (at least at the time of play) makes heavy use of family mobs that only give 40% XP – as I’ve recommended many times before, this issue is one of those things that can be fixed by re-thinking the level range of the arc: if it’s going to be (primarily) a Family story, then using a level range where the Family is worth normal XP works best (IMO), especially given that you *can* get XP now even when exemplared. Obviously, XP issues that can potentially be avoided are kind of a pet peeve, but this was a very good arc overall.
Score: 4.48

Polar Emergence Neutral Government User Interface (Arc ID#29205, 4 stars)
Pro Payne found himself playing (what he thinks was) a rather offbeat origin story. The story itself was good, as was the writing for the clues. This was a case of a relatively simple arc – what’s there is well done, but there really wasn’t much to “grade” per se. But if you’re looking for a quick arc, this is a pretty good “play.”
Score: 3.705

Escalation (Arc ID#6143, 5 stars)
Pro Payne was called in to put a stop to a rather unremarkable villain – and only because the low level heroes that normally put her in jail just weren’t available. Unfortunately, the villain (a Dr. Lashion, who eventually adopted the more formal supervillain persona of “Escalation”) had been defeated one to many times, and decided it was time to unlock the true potential of her rather impressive technological skills in a quest for revenge on Pro Payne. What started as an easy battle with a very unworthy foe “escalates” into a desperate struggle against a very powerful Arch Villain. Suffice it to say this is an extremely well done, very entertaining arc. Excellent in almost every category (writing for the mission briefings and the clues, the mission design and pacing, the design of the custom faction, etc.) – and recently promoted to Developer’s Choice. This is a fantastic arc. Enough said.
Score: 5.42

Should have posted the arcs that you're in range for much, much, sooner, but here they are.

Arc #257226: 'Tis Nobler in the Mind

This is actually the first arc I wrote back in beta. I took it down because I wanted to do new things and it was the one with the least ratings at the time. However, that's not really important.

I imagine the story will be one of those things that you will either love or hate, and some of the missions could be really difficult for some characters, but a scrapper should do just fine. The worst you'll face is an elite boss, and there are allies in that mission anyhow.

If you want to post spoilers about the story, I guess I really can't stop you.

Arc #340316: Drakule vs. The Werewolf Bikers From Hell

I really can't stop making these. This is probably my most mechanically complex arc yet. Like the other Drakule arcs, it's designed with a team in mind, but can be soloed by characters who are built to be able to solo. The first mission in particular is enhanced by a team (or being set to have 4 or more teammates by a analyst/fateweaver). But don't set it that high if you don't feel like you can handle it, of course.

I'm not sure what level you're at now, but if you're getting close...

Arc ID: 347029
Arc Title: Breaking The Barrier (And Putting It Back Together)
Factions:Soldiers of Rularuu, Malta Operatives, Nagans
Morality: Heroic
Length: 5 Missions
Level Range: 40-54
Description: A group of aliens may have bit off more than they can chew when an experiment with stolen portal technology threatens the stability of the Universe itself, allowing the soldiers of Rularuu free access to our dimension. (Sequel to arc# 3326 "The Portal Bandits")

Love Spurned (Arc ID#1934, 2 stars, 3 stars given online)

Pro Payne was just minding his own business when this “desperate lovesick guy” runs up to him. Apparently his “one true love” (who, evidently, hasn’t really noticed him just yet) has made the mistake of wandering into a nearby warehouse that’s known to be a family hangout. Well, something seems suspicious about this, but Pro Payne is all about rescuing damsels in distress (and certainly isn’t adverse to helping a new love bloom), so he heads off to rescue Lovesick’s one true love.

In the warehouse, Pro Payne finds a rather large number of Family thugs, lead by one “Johnny B. Dead.” He also (somehow) knows he needs to confiscate a “Drug Stash.” (”Editor’s Note”: Two issues here; first, the mission objective should probably read something like “Confiscate a drug stash” or “Search for any drug stashes” – also, apparently this was an optional requirement since the mission completed without me ever finding the drug stash; that’s a little jarring, so you might want to mark the objective as optional – or make it non optional if it’s supposed to be required.

In any case, Pro Payne finds and defeats Johnny B. Dead – which turns out to be an awfully odd fight. Johnny keeps accusing Pro Payne of “turning to the dark side,” which seems just plain off given that I’m apparently arresting a warehouse full of known criminals and finding a stash of illegal drugs. And add kidnapping to the list: Pro Payne finds the “One True Love” who has (not surprisingly) been captured by the Family. What is a surprise is that she’s actually a Carnival Dark Ring Mistress. Pro Payne suspects something must be up, since two family minions would never be able to actually capture and hold a Dark Ring Mistress. However, the “One True Love” doesn’t seem to have done anything wrong, so Pro Payne lets her go.

Pro Payne returns to Lovesick, intending to lecture him on the dangers of falling for powerful Carnies, and learns that his One True Love is heading to the bank to make a withdrawal. Uh oh. When Detective Becktrees calls to say the bank is being held up, Pro Payne is pretty sure he knows what’s going on, and heads off to the bank.

The “knows what’s going on” feeling is rapidly lost when Pro Payne finds the bank overrun with the Tsoo. Apparently, they’re the ones robbing the bank, and One True Love was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. She’s once again been taken hostage (oddly enough raising Pro Payne’s suspicions that she’s up to something: there’s just no way the Tsoo could take her hostage, never mind the fact that he can’t imagine a bank actually doing business with a Carnie Ring Mistress in full regalia).


The Tsoo just *can't* have captured a Dark Ring Mistress... something must be up.

There was one other oddity. The Tsoo had apparently planted a bomb to blow the bank sky high. Pro Payne disarmed the bomb, but noticed something very weird: the countdown timer still had 3 days left on it. What the heck? (Yes, this might just be a mistake, but given the other weirdness in the story, the fact the bomb was nowhere near actually going off might actually be part of the plot – if it is, it really needs a clue to draw attention to it.)
Pro Payne returned to Lovesick to tell him the happy news: his one true love, in spite of not even knowing he exists, at least didn’t appear to be in on the bank robbery. Unfortunately, it appeared as though perhaps One True Love had taken an interest in Lovesick after all – he was nowhere to be found, but One True Love and her Carnie cronies were seen taking him into the offices of a local lawyer. Pro Payne to the rescue!

Interestingly, it looked as though One True Love was actually putting together her own little “mini-carnival,” drawn from the members of the villain groups involved in the capers she had been spotted at: the villains really were there for their own nefarious ends, but One True Love was scouting them out, looking for new “inductees.” Within the office building, Pro Payne found Lovesick, who looked like he was in the process of being transformed into some sort of boss version of a Carnie strongman; he, unfortunately, had to have some sense beat into him to break the spell. Roaming the offices were additional “appropriated” Tsoo and Family, in addition to more “traditional” Carnies. The Family and the Tsoo “carnies” (apparently) had their own leaders – One True Love’s de-facto lieutenants – who Pro Payne had to hunt down and defeat. He also found the lawyer who officed here, along with enough evidence in the lawyer’s files to put One True Love away from a long time. Which was ironic, because using evil masks to mind control a small army of evil minions probably would be enough to get someone put away for a long, long time.


Observe Pro Payne beating sense into Lovesick. Because sometimes, violence is just the only way.

In any case, Pro Payne had collected enough evidence to figure out what was going on: the lawyer had worked to spring One True Love from the Zig, intending to blackmail her (”Editor’s Note”: With what?! All the evidence used to put her away in the first place?) But One True Love had turned the tables on the lawyer, and was not only blackmailing him in return (although Pro Payne wasn’t exactly clear on how), but was dressing up as a lawyer herself to spring criminals out of the Zig for “induction” into her horde of loving followers. (”Editor’s Note”: Wait – I thought she was visiting other crime sites and picking them up there: or was she just scoping the crimes out to see who she needed to spring from the Zig next? Also, I honestly think it would make more sense if she was just mind controlling the lawyer into freeing more Zig inmates, rather than actually impersonating the lawyer.

All of this was starting to make Pro Payne’s head hurt, so he just freed the captured lawyer, and proceeded to beat the tar out of One True Love, sending her back to the Zig, and ending the caper once and for all.

For his part, Lovesick (after getting out of the hospital) was last seen pursuing a crush on one of those Knives of Artemis babes. Pro Payne decided to move on to other things…

Pros: I found this to be a very good example of a story with some interesting potential, that just needs some work to go from being the rather confusing (or, I’m sad to say in some places down right unbelievable) arc I played to a very good arc. First of all, I think the basic plot idea has merit, and is a great place to start – it’s just more work needs to be done fleshing it out and getting the plot to, well, “work.” The mission briefings are just fine, and the actual mission design is good too, although I do think the author needs to do a sweep of the arc looking for mission objectives that are defaulting to their “generic” versions, or auto-completing the moment the mission starts (I apologize if the latter isn’t present; I kind of remember it happening once or twice, but I might be wrong about that). The custom mobs are interesting, although if the author is looking for any advice on how to improve them: tone back a bit on the “garish” aspect of their design (although I do acknowledge that the Carnies are *supposed* to look at least somewhat garish) – for lack of a better way to express it, try to make them look a little less “garish” and a little more “Carnie.” No idea if that actually helps. I also liked the prevalence of clues to drive the story along. Heck, if anything, consider using a few more to explain a few of the sticker parts of the plot…

Cons: The text (briefings, clues, even dialog) was in pretty significant need of a few rounds of proofreadings to catch spelling and grammar errors, and maybe even rethink some of the phrasing – there were many places where the phrasing seemed rather awkward (which actually came as a surprise: I didn’t recognize the global name for the arc’s author, so after I played the arc and took my notes, I went back to my thread and looked up who had submitted the arc, and was surprised – I’ve rarely found the author’s forum posts to have particularly awkward phrasing; oddly it seemed like the arc was written in a different “voice” than the author’s). But, of course, here are the two “biggies” – as much as I really wanted to like the story – there were just too many parts of it that didn’t make a lot of sense (even taking into account the dark comedy aspect of it): I’ve tried to highlight that as much as possible in my recounting of Pro Payne’s play of the arc itself – it is in this sense that I think the arc could use some polish in the form of rethinking some of the aspects of the story (where I’ve tried to drop hints as to what would have made more sense to me as I was playing the arc – although “what makes sense to someone” is, quite obviously, subjective, so always take my suggestions with a grain of salt). Second, I found the arc making too much use of “this is how I feel about this.” A word on that. While I don’t fundamentally object to arcs stating how my character is feeling about the situation he finds himself in, that’s a very risky approach. If you’re right, and the arc is evoking the responses that it is telling me I’m feeling, then the technique works. But if not, then the technique really just falls flat. The issue with this arc is the dialog and the mission briefings making it seem like I was getting very frustrated and exasperated – but actually I think “curious and confused” would have been closer to the mark. Of course, rewriting some of the text to focus more on describing the situation, rather than my character’s feelings about or response to the situation, could really help here.

In summary – this is an arc that, in my opinion, had a lot of relatively minor issues; so many that collectively they really hurt the arc, but because they’re fairly minor, I think that, with some work, there’s a lot of potential for this arc to be “cleaned up” into something very, very good.

Score: 2.375

Until next week!

Current Queue: 12647, 292389, 344596, 4643, 257226, 340316, 347029, and 3369.

And to Grinning Spade: Did it expand to 5 missions since I've played it, or did I completely zone out?! (Which is possible...)

I can't remember how long ago you played it, but Matchstick Women #3369 has been going through a lot of changes recently, including a brand new mostly non-combat mission. Feel free to check it out again.