Thalomarre

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  1. True. Here's hoping they'll do something about that, such as at least requiring players to complete an arc before they can rate it.
  2. Just something that occurred to me; we already have the software in place for automatic advertising through in-game billboards; why not apply something like this to the Mission Architect as well?

    Here's my thought: somewhere in the architect buildings is a large monitor that functions as an electronic billboard. It cycles (say every 10-30 seconds) between player-submitted/mod-approved posters story arcs. Possibly also have a functionality wherein if a player clicks on the billboard, it instantly begins the arc it's displaying (or, alternatively, brings up a menu similar to the AE interface we have now, but displaying the last few arcs on display).

    This would allow designers willing to put the extra effort in another means to promote our arcs, and players a little extra something to go by in deciding whether or not to try any particular arc.

    Thoughts?
  3. [ QUOTE ]
    There should also be a 'Windows Scaler' under Options somewhere that will allow you change the size of your in-game windows.

    [/ QUOTE ]

    Ah, that helps. For some reason I could've sworn I'd tried that already. Thanks!

    If anyone has an answer to my question regarding TweakCoH, I'd still be interested to know.
  4. Thanks for the quick responses. I just downloaded the program, but unfortunately I'm still having difficulties. I can change the actual font with no problem, but the size seems to be stuck on 12. I can change it in the UI, and apply it, but then it doesn't change in-game. If I close the program and bring it back up, it's back at 12.

    Any thoughts on why this might be or how I'd fix it?
  5. Well, I just got a new 22" monitor, and am absolutely loving the change from my old 19" CRT. I've only got one problem; at the monitor's native resolution, I'm finding the text in game just a little too small to comfortably read.

    I've found the "Chat Font Size" slider in Options, and bumped that up from 12 to 13, which is just about right, but all it affects is the chat window text. Contact dialogue, character info, etc. is still as small as ever. Is there any way (short of lowering resolution) to increase the font size of all text in the game?
  6. [ QUOTE ]
    Jane is credited on the CoH and CoV boxes, but she is not one of the 'Surviving 15.' So, she left Cryptic, or got moved to a different project, sometime after Issue 6 and before Issue 11.

    [/ QUOTE ]

    Ah, so that explains the noticeable drop in spelling and grammar quality of official content around the time (or shortly after) City of Villains came out.
  7. Count me in as another who really thinks you should continue with these reviews and not let one bad apple spoil the bunch. I felt that you gave Mandu an honest, more-than-fair chance and that he was entirely ungracious about it. Heck, you spent twenty minutes on one mission despite having made clear your distaste for Defeat All missions and Cargo Ship maps at the very beginning. And then offered to give it another run in the future.

    Not all of us are so petty and unappreciative. So if and when you can get around to it, I'd like to submit my mission arc, Queen of the Jinn (#140298, see sig for description). It's a fairly challenging heroic arc, so I'd suggest playing Mikahl Zarak (or Rumble Shock if you don't mind playing a villain through "hero" content). Generally I'd suggest the mission for characters of level 40-50, but for a Willpower character playing at the lowest difficulty, I suspect it won't be that much of a problem (Though if it is, it'll be great to have some honest feedback about it along with video evidence to help me decide what changes need to be made).
  8. Taking a quick look at what was new in the Test server yesterday, it looks like we'll be getting a space to put your contact's "faction" and information, presumably that players will see when they "Ask about this contact." When I tested the mission though, I still didn't get that menu option; I'm sure that's something that will happen by the time I15 goes live, however.

    A mission I'm working on has the "introduction" problem as well. At the moment, I'm sort of having the dialogue imply that the contact is already a known friend or acquaintance of the player. I'm not sure how well that will go over, however.
  9. Just FYI if you're interested: I've done some fairly extensive rebalancing of the enemy group and so far have managed at least to complete the fourth mission (the only one we tried) with a team of three and no deaths. If you'd care to check it out, you can run the whole arc again or play Arc 193541, which is identical except in that it starts with the fourth mission for balance testing. Naturally I'll be taking that one down when I'm satisfied with it.

    Of course I'll gladly repay any further feedback you can offer in kind.
  10. Thanks for the review! First of all, let me point out that, as with your arc, size was a seriously limiting issue for me. There are a lot of things I wanted to put in that I ultimately ended up having to cut.

    [Disclaimer! The following are explanations and personal rationale, not excuses or justifications; I'll most likely go back and attempt to address some of these.]

    [ QUOTE ]

    not really a complaint, but why is the clue jar different from all the others?


    [/ QUOTE ]
    That's basically a throwback to the original incarnation, where I used one or two of each available model of jars. Unfortunately, that meant about four different "collectible goals", so they were one of the first things to go when I needed more space.

    [ QUOTE ]

    the first is the releasing of the jinn. this is one of those elements that goes against your common sense. i had hoped that i could complete the mission without having to destroy the container. alsa, i could not. mainly because since i have no idea what it contains and i know that when i do it i am literally letting the genie out of the bottle.

    [/ QUOTE ]
    Well, I'd hoped that the fact that the CoT didn't want him out of the box would give the impression that it would be a good thing from the player's perspective, but point taken. I'll see if I can provide a better rationale. Since he's crucial in the third mission, I can't very well make it an optional goal.

    [ QUOTE ]

    all the djinn have the same descriptions...


    [/ QUOTE ]
    This was something of a conscious decision. I stated in the description that Jinn "seem to defy categorization", and giving them individual descriptions seemed to me like an attempt to categorize. I may rethink that later. This is the same reason I didn't give them different names (with the exception of "Jinniyah," which is simply the feminine form).

    [ QUOTE ]

    the mission in the midnighter's club is interesting, but i really felt there was no real justification for it. i do not recall for any reason for them being there given. it is just a mission... you save percy, you get some information, but the why is never really answered. why are they there? to what end? is there a purpose that i missed?


    [/ QUOTE ]
    The Jinn were working with the Circle of Thorns, which historically have a longstanding animosity with the Midnight Club. Maybe if I can find the space, I'll find some way to make that clearer.

    [ QUOTE ]

    in the 4th mission is were the field opened up and where i really encountered the jinn out in the open and in numbers. i ran this on tenacious where i would able to see larger groups of bad guys. i quickly found out how hard they were. why are they all LT's? this made it a lot more difficult in the first place. also the combinations of powers were lethal. even with my OWTS running anything more than 4 orange LT enemies i would have to start gobbling inspirations. with 6 enemies it was very hazardous. snowstorm, ice storm, steamy mist, crush, siphon power, etc... was a nightmare. with a large team i could easily see quick team wipes.


    [/ QUOTE ]
    Having minions didn't seem right because, well, Jinn are supposed to be fairly powerful. It just felt like they went down too easily. I also thought it would make for an interesting departure from the standard minion-lieutenant-boss dynamic.

    Believe it or not, it used to be a lot tougher than it is now. The Jinn that currently use dual blades used to be Electric Assault/Electric Armor, and on a team of eight would drain the tanker's endurance to nothing in a matter of seconds. It got to the point where I almost wanted to give up on my own mission. Fortunately, I had a very understanding team who knew I was still tweaking things, so I didn't come out with seven 1-star ratings. The Jinni Princes were quite a bit more powerful at one point as well.

    I have managed to solo it on several of my characters, including a Blaster and a Controller, but it may have helped that I knew what to expect. I'll continue testing and tweaking.

    [ QUOTE ]

    the last two comments are interelated. in the outdoor mission you mention that there might be one or two heros around. you do highlight the one, which may be a hint. but due to the difficulty of the bad guys i quickly started searching for the allies. i found one. i cannot remember off hand, but is serfafina available as an ally or is that your attempt to reproduce her? i was not sure because my memory was failing me at that point. she was not that helpful as an ally though, though that may be out of your control. unless she is your creation, then maybe you could up her powers. to make matters worse, that is such a huge map and it is difficult to find any other ally. if they are available that is... is there another ally?


    [/ QUOTE ]
    Serafina's the only ally on the map; again, this was largely a size constraint. Unfortunately, I did have to recreate her, which ate up a good 7% of my available file size, but given the subject matter, I felt it was only appropriate that she get a cameo.

    I've been told that she does technically exist in the Legacy Chain group, but since her level range is something like 41-50 and the Legacy Chain is set at 5-30, she doesn't show up in the Architect UI. Really hoping they fix this at some point so I can free up some space (Same goes for Percy Winkley, for that matter. Hopefully they'll open him up in the "Citizens" group or something else in the level 1-54 range).

    Originally I did make secondary (Storm Summoning) more powerful, but that proved problematic. She activated Hurricane as soon as the player entered the map, which knocked her captors around and caused her to spout off her entire retinue of lines (including $name and $heshe tags in all their naked glory). I also thought she people might get frustrated with her knocking enemies around willy-nilly. I could raise her primary from Hard to Extreme, which would give her access to Psychic Wail. though I'm not sure how much that would help. I may just upgrade her to an EB.

    [ QUOTE ]

    why not use the jinn that you save as an ally in the last map? he would have been most helpful going through that map. allies are always optional, but for me it would make sense for him to be there to help, just to repay helping him twice. he could more central a character, but as of now he is peripheral. i wonder why?

    [/ QUOTE ]

    I think I originally had planned for Dahnash to play a larger role in the story. There is a history between him and Maimuna; they are both actual characters from the Thousand and One Nights (See the story of Qamar al-Zaman if you're interested. I recommend the Mardrus & Mathers translation, but the one by Husain Haddawy is also excellent). I had continued their story somewhat from where the Nights left off, and would definitely have included some of that if I'd had the space.

    There were a few other reasons we didn't see more of him, though. First, there's the ever-present problem with file size. Secondly (and maybe I was being overcautious), I was trying to avoid falling into the trap of making one particular character more relevant to the story than the player. I'm a firm believer in the idea that a story arc should essentially be about the player-character, and that all others basically play supporting roles.

    I tried to provide a couple of "canonical" reasons for Dahnash not helping out in the final mission in the clue he gives in the third: that he had been severely weakened by a pitched battle with Arachnos, and that he considered his debt repaid when he gave the player his prized dagger so that the Midnighters could forge a new Ring of Solomon (an idea that, as a Jinni who's been cooped up in a box for 600 years because of the original Seal of Solomon, he's not real crazy about to begin with).

    Again, thanks for the feedback. The level of difficulty is something I've really been struggling with, and will probably continue to do so for a while (see the comments in my second post in your Hero Therapy thread about the frustrations inherent in striking an appropriate balance on this front).

    I still don't think I want to downgrade to minions. I'm looking at my Jinn right now and thinking of whether a few small changes will be enough to make a significant difference. If I still have your attention, let me use you as a sounding board...

    Lowering the Broadsword/Storm Summing Jinn's secondary difficulty to Hard would take away Freezing Rain and Tornado, but leave Snow Storm.

    Lowering the Jinniyah's primary (Gravity) to Standard would remove Crushing Field and Wormhole.

    Between the two of them, that would leave Crush and Snow Storm as the only two slowing effects in play. Based on your experience, do you think that would sufficiently alleviate the frustration and difficulty of the group as a whole? Or are there any other serious hurdles that I'm not seeing?

    EDIT: Oh, and since you asked, the fifth map is the Vaults of Mu. Map Type: Unique Maps; Category: Circle of Thorns. I was very happy with how well it worked for the Palace of the Jinn.
  11. I'm planning on respeccing my Archery/Devices blaster into Surveillance and trying to decide how to slot it. To be specific, I'm wondering how much recharge it needs. Is this something that's worthwhile to use as often as possible, or is it more of a "once, before the battle" thing?
  12. Yeah, I had a feeling space constraints probably factored into a lot of what I commented on. I really hope we'll get more space per arc sometimes in the near future; I've had the same problem myself, and it's really frustrating not to be able to completely fulfill your vision.

    [ QUOTE ]
    truthfully i had that initially but it was a bug where it said $name instead of the hero name. which was annoying... maybe i will check it again.

    [/ QUOTE ]

    The $name and $himher bug has affected me as well. For some reason, sometimes NPCs just want to say everything the moment you enter the mission rather than waiting for you to get close.

    [ QUOTE ]

    this is a difficult issue to address. i am thinking psychologically... by interacting with them you are assuming responsibility for them and then releasing them. it could go either way really. but i like the idea that the space becomes clearer.

    [/ QUOTE ]

    Hmmm.... yeah, I can see what you're going for. I think the problem for me was I got the impression I was just beating myself up over the issue, which would only make it worse. The short activation time might have been part of what led to that, since it didn't allow much time for actual thought, but maybe the text could also be worded differently? Maybe something like, "After some contemplation, you realize and accept that you were in the wrong."

    [ QUOTE ]
    true, but in modern parlance it is an equivalent idea. there is the technical term and there is the common idea of it... though i should probably not mix it with the therapist.

    [/ QUOTE ]

    Right, of course I know how it's used in common parlance; I wouldn't have commented on it if anyone other than the Therapist had used it. It just seemed that with his role as a psychoanalyst, coupled with the way he phrased it, he was trying to invoke a technical psychological terminology.

    [ QUOTE ]
    in the fourth mission i get a little more specific with some memories, but people get on me when i get too specific. again, htough i would love more detail, the memory is a problem.

    [/ QUOTE ]
    I think the "too specific" or "not specific enough" issue is something where you're never gonna please everyone. True, some of the things the story assumes won't work for all characters. In fact, when I started playing the arc, I was playing a character who came from a mythical tropical paradise where everyone had wings. I met the librarian and said, "Hmmm... that doesn't make much sense." It didn't really bother me, though. I just started over with a character who had a more "traditional" background. I suppose if it had been later in the arc I might've been a little bit miffed.

    At any rate, I don't think it's much of a problem if you stick to general themes and events that most modern American adults have dealt with at some point in their lives (while still being unspecific enough to allow room for interpretation by the player). You're bound to step on a few toes, but I think it's better than the alternative of leaving the arc completely bland, with no meaningful details whatsoever.

    [ QUOTE ]

    i like the door a lot too. i had to tone him down a little in the powersets, but he is a good fight. not too many complaints with battling him. i have recieve more complaints with secret shame, but most from blasters. interestingly enough i get more complaints for the door from scrappers. what archetype did you use? i also like the uncertainty that he uses, in addition to his powers, too. he is probably my favorite creation.

    [/ QUOTE ]

    I was playing a Blaster (Level 50 Archery/Devices, to be precise). Yeah, I got killed a couple times, and finally had to go back and fill my tray with inspirations. What really gave me trouble were the Nightmare ambushes, particularly in the earlier missions. They pretty much wiped the floor with me the first three or four times. I didn't comment on that because for one, I was playing a Blaster and was a little out of practice with that character, and for another, I wasn't terribly bothered by it. I actually like the way the little buggers come out of nowhere and swarm you like that. On later missions, when I was more in practice and had access to most of my powers, I managed to defeat them without getting killed (while still making for a good fight), which was actually rather cool; it was like I was finally conquering my fears after having struggled with them so much.

    Plus, I know all to well how frustrating it can be, trying to balance an encounter to make it universally challenging, but not overwhelmingly difficult. An enemy Character A will mop the floor with without breaking a sweat, Character B will find nearly impossible to defeat. And then with other encounters it may be reversed, where Character B breezes through and Character A hits a brick wall. I think there has to be a point where you just say "I'm happy with the way it is now. If someone else isn't, they can lump it."

    (I feel I should mention that, while I may be nearing that point in my own published arcs, I'm not quite there yet, so feel free to comment on difficulty when you play mine!)

    On a related note, and I meant to put this in my original review, I love that each mission progressively raises the level cap. Very effective way to show that I was progressing psychologically and coming to terms with myself.
  13. Here's one I think would be appropriate for Extrasensory:

    Arc offered to which character?: Extrasensory
    Arc Name: Queen of the Jinn
    Arc ID: 140298
    Faction: Heroic
    Creator Global/Forum Name: @Thalomarre
    Level Range: 41-50
    Soloable?: Yes
    Length: 5 missions
    Difficulty Level: Challenging
    Synopsis: The Midnight Squad has made an alarming discovery: the Circle of Thorns have found a new and dangerous ally from the Mysterious East. Can our heroes fight back this menace, or will Paragon City fall beneath the power of the Queen of the Jinn?
    Estimated Time to Play: 1-2 hours
  14. Thalomarre

    Bombs?

    Unfortunately, I don't believe that is yet a possibility.
  15. Hi Ridiculous Girl,

    I've posted a comprehensive review in your thread for Hero Therapy! (TM).

    If you could take a look at either of the arcs in my sig (I'm particularly hoping for feedback on Queen of the Jinn, but I'm not picky), it'd be much appreciated. Thanks!
  16. Here's my review. I've essentially broken it down section by section and typed up these notes as I went. As a disclaimer, I may seem overcritical, or nitpicky about certain details. Just be aware that a lot of what I'm saying is what I would do, which isn't to say that I think it's "wrong" as it is; most of the little things didn't affect my overall rating. I made a lot of notes on punctuation that I feel would make the text read more smoothly, but overall I think it reads pretty well, so I don't think it's crucial that you go in and fix every little comma and period if you'd rather just focus on the bigger stuff.

    So, that said, on with the review:

    [u]Therapy Session 1[u]

    Sendoff

    Change "countdown" to "count down"

    I'd tone down the green text a bit. Coloring text is a good way to highlight key points, but when long passages of text are colored, it kind of defeats the purpose.

    Are the parentheticals during the countdown spoken by the Therapist or simply telling me what's happening? I'm guessing it's the latter, in which case I would give it a different color rather than using parentheses (I'm partial to Sky Blue for that sort of thing, myself).

    This may be subjective, but I would spell out any numbers when presented as spoken dialogue; use "ten" instead of 10, etc. To me, when numbers are spelled out it reads more like a person is speaking and less like I'm reading a list.

    Intro Popup
    Interesting choice to put the introductory popups in the first person. It seems to work rather well.

    Mission
    TrollVahzilok Battle: I'd change "those guys" to either $name or $himher; when I'm soloing this (which most people would be, especially with a story like this), it doesn't make much sense to be referred to in the plural.

    The Therapist: "Ok" should be "OK" or "Okay", followed by a comma. I'd also contract "it is" to "it's."

    The Steel you Lack: I'd capitalize "You" in his name. Also consider adding some dialogue to the encounter. Maybe give the Outcasts a line. I realize that the ally himself is supposed to be silent, but it may help to drive the point home by having him say "...", rather than leave the player to think maybe you just didn't bother giving him any lines.
    Also, the only attack I saw him use was his Throwing Blade, once. Generally, he would just run up to an enemy and stare at them. Not your fault; there seems to be a bug with melee-oriented custom allies. Just something to be aware of.

    The Librarian: Nice look, good choice of power sets. No complaints here.

    Debriefing
    The first sentence, "Well, that was certainly interesting and successful for the first attempt," seems a little odd to me. I think it's because "interesting" and "successful" seem to be conjoined when, at least in my mind, the two words don't really have any relation to one another in this context. A comma after "interesting" might be enough to break them up so it's clear the therapist is expressing two different thoughts. You could also try a ellipses ("Well, that was certainly interesting... and successful for the first attempt"), or breaking it into two sentences ("Well, that was certainly interesting. And successful for the first attempt.")
    Comma after "He may not say much."

    [u]Therapy Session 2[u]
    Introduction
    Commas after:
    "there you are"
    "your subconscious"
    I'm noticing the Therapist doesn't use many contractions. Is this deliberate?

    Sendoff
    Remove the comma from "Now that you are familiar with the process, because of your first..."; it creates some ambiguity as to whether the "because" relates to the first part of the sentence or the last.

    Comma after "your own mind"

    Change the commas after "side issue" and "your own mind, though" to semicolons or periods.

    Same notes as above with green text and numbers.

    Intro Popup
    Probably wanna contract "I am" to "I'm."

    Mission
    Broken Friendships/Promises: Remove the pural "s"'s; remember that the player can see glowie names in their target tray, and I assume one corpse represents one friendship or promise.
    Add an exclamation point to the interrupt text for friendships.I'd also lengthen the activation time for both, to give the impression of contemplation. As it is, it feels like I'm jumping to these conclusions awfully fast! If you're worried about it becoming too tedious, you could reduce the number of glowies (May not be a bad idea in and of itself, actually; just how many promises have I broken, anyway? It's a wonder anyone likes me at all!)
    Why do the objects disappear after I click on them? The friendships and promises are still broken, and there's nothing in the text to suggest my contemplations have allowed me to forgive myself or forget about them. Quite the contrary, in fact.
    I do like the symbolism involved. While of course you want to avoid assuming too much about the character's history, it would be nice to see something a little more descriptive than "You can only conclude that it was your fault..." Maybe something like "You conclude that you were never there enough for your friend." If the player has already forgiven you for inserting a scary librarian in their past, this doesn't seem like too much of a stretch.

    The Therapist: Have him say something when I come back after losing him so I know he's following me again.

    The Steel you Lack:
    Change captured animation; the default seems rather out of character.

    Vanity:
    Change the question mark after "You must be joking" to an exclamation point.

    Debriefing
    I'd drop the "or their ego" clause in the first sentence. In psychology the "ego" is the part of you that mediates between the superego and the id; it has nothing to do with vanity.

    [u]Therapy Session 3[u]
    Introduction and Sendoff
    You can probably do without the "Yes?" in the first paragraph. Ditto in the last paragraph before the countdown on the sendoff.

    Intro Popup
    Second person now? If you're gonna put one of these in the first person, I'd fully commit to it and make them all that way.

    Lost Memory: Again, I like the symbolism. However, it'd be nice if we were offered some clue as to what the lost memory was. I'd say leave it vague enough to be open to interpretation to allow for differing character backgrounds, but there should be it should at least provide a general shape that I can fill. Maybe something like "You recover a forgotten memory about a hated childhood bully." Not too much detail, general enough that it could apply to anyone. Worded thusly, the bully could even have been the character himself. Obviously, this would mean you'd have to make each Lost Memory unique.

    Repressed Memory: I like the variation on the generic "hapless citizen" text in the description. Again, same note as with Lost Memory, however; a little hint in dialogue would go a long way.

    Vanity: Her description is no longer appropriate in this mission (Same may be said of the Librarian in the previous one). You should change it to reflect the fact that she's now my ally, rather than an obstacle to be surmounted.

    Your Secret Shame: Remember to enter the navigation text for this.
    Interestingly enough, I don't feel like any extra is needed for this one. Maybe because as the "main boss" and the ultimate focus of the mission, it should be something uniquely personal to the character, so any clarification at all would detract from that uniqueness. I think the appearance of the EB is enough to provide a vague hint as to the nature of my secret shame. In my case, it also helps that she looks a bit like a pre-teen version of my character.

    Debriefing
    Gah! I mapserved just as I clicked the contact and din't get his debriefing. Oh well, onto the next mission...

    [u]Therapy Session 4[u]
    Introduction
    Replace comma after "This is your own mind" with a semicolon.
    This is more of an observation than anything else, but I find it interesting that the Therapist is encouraging me to explore my subconscious. It's generally considered that things go in your subconscious when they're too traumatic or disturbing to be consciously aware of and still be mentally healthy, so delving into your own subconscious could theoretically drive you insane. Hmmm... I think I just got an idea for a new villain. Anyway, that said, I don't know if there's anything in the text that should be changed based on that; just something that sort of popped in my head.

    Mission
    Love both the destructable negative memories and the collectible positive memories. It's like you somehow took my advice about the memories in the last mission and implemented it here! There's also something I really like about the idea of going into my own mind and violently obliterating all my unpleasant memories. Since the idea is to preserve the postivie memories, however, I would have them not disappear after being clicked.

    Random Encounters: Just noticed this faction name. I'd change it to something a little more immersive. Something like "Dream Fragments", except less lame.

    The Door
    Turned out to be surprisingly challenging, even as an EB, and even with my own EB fighting beside me. Which made finally defeating him all the more satisfying.


    Debriefing
    "you" to "your" in "aspects of you mind"

    [u]Final Thoughts[u]
    Very well-written arc; I enjoyed the concept, symbolism and the "dream" quality of the missions very much. Great costume design on custom NPCs throughout. All in all, this is a quality piece of work!

    I rated it a 4 out of 5. I think with a little more detail in the places I mentioned, the arc could easily be a five-star story arc.
  17. Two excellent heroic arcs I played yesterday:

    Attack of the Space Gremlins by @AlwaysAPrice (#4077)
    Probably the most fun I've had in a player-created arc yet. Well, written, engaging and dynamic story.

    The Science of Eternity by @Wonderslug (#123178)
    Great high-level story arc involving a canonical low-level villain. Brilliantly written dialogue throughout.
  18. Arc Name: Queen of the Jinn
    Arc ID: 140298
    Faction: Heroic
    Creator Global/Forum Name: @Thalomarre
    Difficulty Level: Challenging
    Synopsis: The Midnight Squad has made an alarming discovery: the Circle of Thorns have found a new and dangerous ally from the Mysterious East. Can our heroes fight back this menace, or will Paragon City fall beneath the power of the QUEEN OF THE JINN?

    In this arc, I've attempted to invoke a distinct Arabian Nights feel. Characters and ideas are largely drawn from ancient Middle Eastern folklore, with some creative license.

    Any constructive feedback is welcome and, if desired, reciprocated. The final two missions of the arc are very challenging and contain AV encounters, but should be soloable for most self-sufficient builds if played well.

    Any constructive feedback is welcome and, if desired, reciprocated!
  19. Generally I won't lower my rating for one or two typos or spelling errors. I have on occasion knocked a star off for arcs that were absolutely riddled with them.

    I'll admit that I have sometimes said something along the lines of "You made several spelling errors" without pointing them out specifically. This is due in part to lack of space in the comments field, but if an arc has more than just a few, I figure if the author cares enough, they'll do the necessary proofreading on their own. That said, if the errors aren't absolutely overwhelming I'll usually make notes of them as I go, so the author can always contact me if they want specifics.

    In dialogue of course, I know people in general don't use textbook grammar (in fact, if they did, I'd probably have to call them on that), so I'm not too concerned about sentence structure in the like on that. I will point out missing commas and other punctuation, since in speech even the most ungrammatical of individuals uses the pauses and intonations they represent. The one time I really became a stickler for it was when the contact was explicitly portrayed as a strict grammarian. In that instance, I happily pointed out every dangling participle and end-of-sentence preposition I came across.
  20. [ QUOTE ]
    [ QUOTE ]
    With the new expansion, "Going Rouge", I believe a market merger is inevitable now.

    Discuss.


    [/ QUOTE ]Rogue.

    [/ QUOTE ]

    "Going Rouge" conjures up an entirely different image in my mind...
  21. Just finished the arc. Good story, fairly well-written text, if a little stilted in places.

    I'll just go over my notes from start to finish. Note that I caught a lot of the same typos Airhead did, which I won't repeat here.

    Part 1
    Intro Text
    I had a little trouble reconciling my hero's mentality when accepting this mission; saving a Snake hatchery strikes me as a gray area at best. I would move mention of the player's impending death to the intro text, so I'm given a more concrete incentive to accept the mission.

    Mission
    Not a bad idea, using the cocoons as eggs. Hopefully at some point we'll be able to place actual Snake eggs as destructible objects.

    Part 2
    The Alcazar's text was a little weird. The "Hmmmmmm"s in his initial dialogue threw me off a bit. "Hmmm" is a sound I associate more with contemplation than concentration. I'm not sure what you might put in its place, though. "Mmmmmmm" might be a bit better.

    The other thing I noticed about the Alcazar is his line, "Expel this Blaster..." This might be just me, but I tend to think of our archetypes names as sort of a meta-concept, used by the players to describe their characters, but never by the characters themselves. I would change $archetype to something like "intruder" or "wretch." Or you could just go with "Expel $himher..."

    I must say I laughed out loud at the exit popup text for that mission.

    Part 3
    Intro Text
    You put an extra "e" on "glimpsse."

    Enter Popup
    like -> as though

    Mission
    While I'm something of a fan of red herring glowies myself, there is such a thing as too much. It got a bit tedious to stop every few feet to click on each of those tablets on my way through the cave. I'd say you could reduce their number by at least half.

    It was a little odd having a clue for the bluish tablet both from the glowie and from mission completion. I'd get rid of one or the other.

    Return Text
    these -> this

    Part 4
    Send-Off Text
    Nice use of font size; it was fairly effective at indicating a change of voice.

    Enter Popup
    Amazons -> Amazon

    Return Text
    on itss -> in itss
    thisss -> thessse?
    I hesitate with that last correction because the multiple "S"'s make it look like it could be pronounced "thess." Maybe just go with "these," without the extra consonants.

    Part 5
    Intro
    a exceprt -> an excerpt (Airhead's correction on this was incorrect )

    Mission
    I feel sort of ambivalent about your choice of map. On one hand, it's not one I've seen often, making the mission stand out; on the other, it sure is hard to navigate! Especially vexing when I reached the Shadow Lurker and he kept running from me. I'd consider doing one of two things: either change to another map, or make the mission itself more interesting. As it is right now, it's essentially just a matter of "fight your way to the end until you reach the big boss," without much to keep the player's intrigue on the way. Add some patrols and/or mini-bosses with dialogue, maybe one or two glowies, throw in some clues to expand or clarify the story; anything to break up the monotony.

    Exit Popup
    live -> life

    Return Text
    in a wild goose chase -> on a wild goose chase
    However, "wild goose chase" doesn't strike me as a turn of phrase this character would use.
    Again, live -> life

    It was a little disappointing not receiving any sort of hint as to why the Cult wanted to kill me.

    Overall Notes
    I liked the design of the enemy NPCs, both in terms of costume and description. I also like that you didn't throw them at the player in Part 1, but let the story unfold a little first.

    The story itself--the nature of the Cult, etc--was a little hard for me to follow. However, this may be partly because I was in "correction mode", and paying more attention to spelling and grammar than I was to the story itself. Still, my gut tells me that it wouldn't hurt to clarify and reveal a little more to the player.

    All in all, I did thoroughly enjoy the arc, however, and rated it 4 stars. I can see that quite a bit of work has gone into the crafting of the story and, while it still strikes me as a little rough, I do believe it's a good one.

    I'd be happy for you to play and rate either of the arcs in my signature. Be advised, "A Show to Die For!" is probably the more solo-friendly of the two (though still challenging), but I've received less feedback on "Queen of the Jinn," so the choice is yours. Thanks in advance, and I hope I was able to help!
  22. The devs and mods have in the past shown themselves to be more progressive than one might expect from a lot of other MMOs, even helping to promote events sponsored by gay/lesbian SGs (and, for that matter, removing the word "gay" from the forum's censor filter).

    Not having played Heraclea's arc, I couldn't say whether it crossed a line or could reasonably have been construed as offensive to any group, but I don't think it's fair to depict the Powers That Be as soulless profiteers. If they cared more about making a buck than maintaining a quality game and in-game community, I'm sure they'd be doing things differently.

    That said, I hope Heraclea's arc is restored, even if it might require a few edits in order to clarify that her story's intent is in no way malicious or defamatory.
  23. [ QUOTE ]
    Since she's not attackable, the mission wouldn't break in any way if she was spawned at 40 (her minimum) even though the mission level was 5. I know their engine could handle that because sometimes in normal content you get spawns turning up that way -- all they'd need to do is change the mission editor (or whatever's computing the level range) to not pay attention to non-combat hostages.

    [/ QUOTE ]

    Agreed. I've said the exact same thing elsewhere; it would give us a lot more freedom with no ill effects if this change were made.
  24. [ QUOTE ]
    Honestly, rather then making some enemies available at lower levels. For the sake of the MA I'd like to see some enemies that stop at level 45-47 be able to go up to 54 in MA missions. I want high level Succubuses and Possessed Duke Mordrogor.

    [/ QUOTE ]

    I'm inclined to agree with this. It'd also be nice if they'd fill in the gaps in some groups, such as where Family can spawn at 1-35 or40-50 (or whatever the actual level ranges are). It's kind of frustrating when one of my arcs should work at levels 1-50, but becomes 40+ the moment I decide to include Family.

    On the subject of NPCs messing up level ranges, I'm really hoping that eventually "Rescue" and non-combat "Escort" and "Ally" NPCs are made not to have an effect on mission level ranges. There've been several occasions when I've wanted to put a certain NPC in for the player to rescue, but that NPC would necessarily pull down the mission's level cap, even though they would never attack or be attacked by anything.
  25. Hmmm. That statement is open to interpretation. I take it to mean that the discussion was not about whether or not farming missions are valid, but what measures are acceptable to prevent them.

    On one extreme, they could remove rewards from MA missions altogether, but that would unfairly punish the entire player base. On the other, they could give us the ability to put anything and everything we could ever possibly want in our arcs and have them grant full rewards to the player--but then farming would truly run rampant, and I still maintain that farming is at its core something none of the Powers That Be want. And for good reason.

    The "raised voices", I think, aren't about whether or not farming is a valid style of play, but about what and how much constitutes a permissible sacrifice to the freedom of legitimate players and designers in order to discourage it.