It's November, another month. Thank you to those who have participated. Everyone who's submitted their own arc for feedback has done their part so far. Now it's time for another two arcs. I'd also love to see some suggested little-played arcs from other authors. Point them to this thread in your feedback, let's get this club growing.
Crime is Art and Art is Crime has been the most popular arc so far with 6 plays, and there's a few newer arcs that haven't gotten played much or at all yet. PW's OSS arc, Zaphir's Astral Prison arc, and Supafreak's Black as Midnight arc.
I haven't joined in until now because mainly I have wanted to submit an arc that I haven't written yet. Not sure when (or if) I will, so I thought I might as well get started.
Welcome to M.A.G.I.
Over all a good story, with a few (possible) errors I sent in a comment, so I won't repeat them here (and I said possible because I am not sure they are errors). A few non-cannon points that might have some up in arms, but honestly, I am not big on cannon myself and even the devs have made some mistakes there, so only mentioning it as a warning to purists.
Some good points: Nice variety in the groups you fight, mostly standards - good thing (good at lower levels, customs are generally harder to defeat than standard enemies), kuddos for avoiding the CoT maps (I don't much like them either), and liked how we got to meet the "big bad" early on and yet having him get away so we can face him later, and have it actually make sense! I know we get to do that in stories and novels, but I don't see it often in MA and I think it helps to develop the story. Good Job!
Arc #115935 Cracking Skulls by @Flame Kitten
Good Short story (3 Missions) without a lot of text (not a bad thing), enemies are mostly Skulls with a few good customs (Good at lower levels, see above comment).
I mentioned that there was not a lot of text earlier, but one area that did have a lot of text was the objectives in at least the 1st 2 missions. I believe that you can tell a story by details in the clues, NPC dialogue, the objectives, etc., but less is more when it comes to the objectives - less words, that is. I like to glance at my objectives quickly and a lot of text there makes it harder to be quick. Not meant as a complaint, just a suggestion to look at it from a different viewpoint, since it does tend to pull you out of the action.
Onward!
Arc #525356 Agent of the OSS by @PW
Good story, fast-paced. Almost too fast paced, it ended before I expected it to (I hadn't finished reading clues because I expected it to continue). That might have been a bug, my last mission said it completed, gave me the option to exit while still showing objectives to complete. I may have to re-run this to see what happened.
Quote:
Thanks for the play and the in-game feedback. I'll take a look at the potential errors when I can get enthused about AE again. I've still got a boatload of revisions to make on the arc.
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Originally Posted by Lord of Storms
Welcome to M.A.G.I.
Over all a good story, with a few (possible) errors I sent in a comment, so I won't repeat them here (and I said possible because I am not sure they are errors). A few non-cannon points that might have some up in arms, but honestly, I am not big on cannon myself and even the devs have made some mistakes there, so only mentioning it as a warning to purists. Some good points: Nice variety in the groups you fight, mostly standards - good thing (good at lower levels, customs are generally harder to defeat than standard enemies), kuddos for avoiding the CoT maps (I don't much like them either), and liked how we got to meet the "big bad" early on and yet having him get away so we can face him later, and have it actually make sense! I know we get to do that in stories and novels, but I don't see it often in MA and I think it helps to develop the story. Good Job! |
@Doctor Gemini
Arc #271637 - Welcome to M.A.G.I. - An alternative first story arc for magic origin heroes. At Hero Registration you heard the jokes about Azuria always losing things. When she loses the entire M.A.G.I. vault, you are chosen to find it.
PENGUIN by Tubbius
Actually ran this with the author himself. I liked how this was handled, using the contact as a hologram/visual mail program, with passwords used to allow you to continue to learn more. At first I found it a little jarring (for lack of a better word) because I felt like I should be traveling to the city zone and not entering the lightstream as always, but that passed and it felt more immersive maybe? Hard to say it exactly. Maybe more like it just felt right. It reminded me of a movie, where I stumble across a website or program and I am trying to hack into it out of curiosity, and I have to investigate in the real world to find more clues.
A good, light-hearted, somewhat short story, and a good introduction for one of Paragon's most memorable heroes, Waddle!
Oh, you are probably wondering what arc I would like to be reviewed...
#514570 Terra Mystika: The Nexus
A fellow hero tells you she is from another dimension and asks for help in defending her world. Helping her quickly brings up the question: Is there a traitor amongst her people?
Looking for feedback, especially comments on whether there is too much information given that it detracts from the story, which is generally a mystery. I am talking specifically about the backgrounds of the villain groups (talk to the contact, the "busy" text), "extra" storylines (Nexus Shadows, etc), or other tidbits that might seem outside the main story.
Arc Played: The Astral Prison.
I played this with Dawnrazor, level 41 Katana/Invul Scrapper set to +1/x4/Yes bosses/no AVs. No issues with the difficulty level.
Overall I felt this was a good concept for an arc, and the execution was well done, and flowed well. One big problem with a concept like this is the issue of character hijacking, and you managed to mostly avoid this. The enemies are well-chosen, and I didn't find the customs overpowered. No complaints regarding map choices or gameplay.
Now, the first problem is with the level range. By level 40 you've already shut down Project Locke, and you're cleaning up the left-overs. Canonically, this arc should cap out at level 40. The other canon issue is, where did Crey get sapper guns? If they had them, you'd think they'd use them in-game, no?
The other issue is the sense of "something doesn't add up here" that starts with the initial contact. I assume your intent was to have the player catch on early in the arc, but the contact doesn't need to be a part of it. Crey would make the effort to put together a logical, cohesive "cover story" that your character is likely to fall for. The optional objectives in mission 1 do a good job of tipping you off though, so I'd make some of them mandatory.
Overall though, good job, just has a few holes that bugged me.
Eva Destruction AR/Fire/Munitions Blaster
Darkfire Avenger DM/SD/Body Scrapper
Arc ID#161629 Freaks, Geeks, and Men in Black
Arc ID#431270 Until the End of the World
Thanks for the play, glad to hear you (mostly :P) liked the arc! And thanks for the ingame notes too, will change Psyche to Numina.
Level range: It is an issue, yeah. I wanted to make an 'end-gamey' arc with possible incarnate power usage, and the reused stock enemies were mostly 40+ themselves. It's also a "sort of sequel" to my 'Coldest of Wars' arc, which was 40-45. Unfortunately I find that enemy group level restrictions are really painful when trying to design an arc 
(the same thing applies to 'To Reign in Hell').
Sappers: I figured Crey would be willing to spend some serious time/effort to steal/copy/research a copy of the Malta 'hero-incap' gun... this is a deviation from canon, though there's always the "they aren't using it on the streets because it's a research prototype" copout. 
Mystery: Yeah, I wanted the player to figure 'almost everything' out by the end of M2 (I didn't want them to hold the idiot ball) and have some strong doubts by the end of M1 if they explored everything. The doc is also overconfident at this point, since they've been "doing this thing" for 10+ years without getting caught... hopefully that explains why he isn't trying too hard.
I'll consider making the memory crystal objective mandatory, though I hate glowie hunts in outdoor maps in general (the main purpose of the optional 'escort' objective is simply to put the mandatory glowie objective on the player's map). Any suggestions about that?
Thanks again for the review and suggestions!
-- Z.
I am in AE right now, and will use this thread to recommend arcs I'll play. Feedback to come.
Thanks for setting this thread up.
Virtue Server-
MA: (All SFMA, all technically long/very long, but all play quickly)
#200411 "Exploding Planet" (I apologize in advance for the final mission, but in all likelihood, the planet will explode.)
#144416 "Shadow of Grime Alley"
#161003 "You Don't Know Beanstalk, Jack"
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After the clue in the first mission I was all "but Malta wouldn't be helping Crey with this...." and was about to point out that canon discrepancy, until it became clear that Crey had the guns.|
Originally Posted by Zaphir
Sappers: I figured Crey would be willing to spend some serious time/effort to steal/copy/research a copy of the Malta 'hero-incap' gun... this is a deviation from canon, though there's always the "they aren't using it on the streets because it's a research prototype" copout.
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Quote:
| I'll consider making the memory crystal objective mandatory, though I hate glowie hunts in outdoor maps in general (the main purpose of the optional 'escort' objective is simply to put the mandatory glowie objective on the player's map). Any suggestions about that? |
Eva Destruction AR/Fire/Munitions Blaster
Darkfire Avenger DM/SD/Body Scrapper
Arc ID#161629 Freaks, Geeks, and Men in Black
Arc ID#431270 Until the End of the World
Played Arc #514570: Terra Mystika: The Nexus by @Lord of Storms on a level 42 thug/pain MM at 0x2 with bosses on.
General: I spotted a few run-on sentences and such -- recommend an editing pass. Sorry I couldn't be more helpful, as I'm not a native speaker myself :P I did send you a list of typos I've spotted.
Gameplay: Overall it was mostly easy with some challenging parts (as expected from my diff settings). Akarzetal's ambush was surprisingly tough, I had to burn half of my inspiration tray to live through it -- this isn't a bad thing, mind! The custom enemies/allies were fine. Consider making Gaius' "defeat boss" objective in M3 complete after only killing the boss (instead of the entire group), as the engineers like to run away a lot.
Design: Very good costume design on all customs and the contact, kudos. Good map choices on most missions, though M2 baffles me a bit -- why use a derelict office building instead of a base or warehouse map? I'd personally refrain from putting words into $name's mouth in briefings (even if it's saying something reasonable that the player would *probably* say). The extra info in the 'busy' text was a nice touch, but a bit abrupt -- maybe add a bit of introductory text, such as "Melinda tells you a few things about the Nexus" in italics / in a different color as the first line?
Detail: I recommend adding some text to Zephandal in M1, right now he's just a mute punching bag. Even generic "die, meddling hero!!"-style lines would be fine. I found that M2 was "just hanging there", adding some extra info/flavor about the Alliance (optional clues, optional bosses, patrol speech) would've been very nice. The chaos rifts were sometimes enemies and sometimes friends, and they also had mute doppelgangers with them -- maybe add some speech to the 'gangers (even if they can't speak, emotes would be nice)?
Story: Interesting story, I liked it... good backstory too, I especially appreciated the M2 'busy text' background as a Hungarian *grin*. I really liked the last mission, even with the MA restrictions being as they are. It was a bit too easy to figure out the solution, as one of the previous clues contains all the information the player needs to make an accurate guess. Maybe require the player to combine knowledge from multiple clues to find out the answer?
Overall: A strong arc, though it could benefit from more flavor / details.
-- Z.
Just played #459581, Kill or Cure by @Samuraiko
I have to rush through this review (getting family breakfast time aggro) I'll try to write something up that's more comprehensive later.
Overall, I enjoyed the story, and how it progressed. I ran it with my MA/SR incarnate scrapper at baseline difficulty, and it was no problem. That's good for me, since I was in it for the story, and not a combat experience. I was able to stealth past many intervening mobs, since this was largely a detective style clue gathering experience.
That was a good experience, overall.
I'll present some nitpicks. I believe the objective chaining in the final mission.
(SPOILER...)
I encountered the defeated and dying Viviane at the front of the mission, on defeating the Rikti around her, the text implied I had cured her and I then escorted her to the front.
I still had a goal to stop Dissolution from opening the portal, I assumed that Viv had set something in motion and I had to stop it. In the final room, I found Dissolution, still virus-striken and ready to open a portal to invade the Rikti homeworld with death. I defeated her, and the text clues implied that I should then cure her. I believe her defeat should have spawned the hostage/escort version of her.
One other thing, in the Nemesis weather station mission, one objective was "Hear Dissolution's recorded message." (It was something like that.) I think a better clue would have been to generically imply that I needed to track down Dissolution. I went into the mission vaguely assuming that she would be on the map, and the mission goal removed that ambiguity by giving me advance knowledge that she had left me a recorded message.
I enjoyed the arc, I'd play it again with some other of my characters.
Virtue Server-
MA: (All SFMA, all technically long/very long, but all play quickly)
#200411 "Exploding Planet" (I apologize in advance for the final mission, but in all likelihood, the planet will explode.)
#144416 "Shadow of Grime Alley"
#161003 "You Don't Know Beanstalk, Jack"
[aside: I personally prioritize Arc Club arcs by the number of plays -- single-digit ones go first!]
For my second arc, I played #525356: Agent of the OSS by @PW, same setup (lv42 thug/pain MM +0x2 w/bosses).
Gameplay: If "Project Dragon" was all about kung-fu fightin', this was all about beating up Nazis. It's pretty good in that respect, though I encountered an annoying situation in M2. Right after I summoned my pets, all hell broke loose inside the casino; Heinrich said 2 lines at the same time as a soldier and Monica saying 2-2 lines each. A few seconds later I was hit by an ambush throwing an AOE that faceplanted my minion-level pets immediately and I also bit it before I could get up from the knockback. After I zoned back in, Monica was half-dead and died before I could get another set of pets up and running and save her (I tried gang war, wasn't enough), so I failed the mission right there. This may be my own fault for playing at 0x2, but I usually don't have problems like this. Something to look into, perhaps?
Design: Aside from the M2 issue, the only 'problem' I found that in M3 it was quite easy to avoid fighting the Doktor, which was a bit anticlimactic to me (maybe you're not supposed to fight him, though).
Detail: I think the overall detail level was quite good, though the start of M1 (the outdoor part of the map) was a bit too barren/static. Maybe add some patrols and/or mix up the stuff the guards say with various (possibly cheesy) German words here and there?
Story: Oh man, Nazis and time machines... I'm suddenly reminded of Freedom Force vs. the Third Reich. The story was solid and connected well to exiting COH lore (word to Herr U, der Unbekannt!); I also liked the ending.
Overall: A good bit of Nazi-bashin', if a bit short.
-- Z.
Quote:
Okay, spoilers abound.|
Originally Posted by Fantastic_Foe
Just played #459581, Kill or Cure by @Samuraiko
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SPOILERS
I briefly discussed the arc a few posts back. I have a few more points up for @samuraiko to consider.
I missed the actual holographic recording of Dissolution at first. The clue said I had to find the recording of Dissolution, so I was looking for some kind of glowing communication terminal.
Since Dissolution was nearly invisible, and since I was stealthing past most of the Nemesis, I missed her at first. Had the clue not unambiguously told me I was looking for a recording, I might have noticed the hostage/hologram (then again, I might not have.)
The background information for the recording was the boilerplate details for a minion.
In retrospect, I have some questions about the overall arc. The first two missions implies that whoever was behind the theft of SERAPH's Rikti research had tremendous resources, there was a clue indicating that the Malta were expecting to be paid in the multi-millions.
The sewer mission had roving bands of old-school Mother Mayhem Praetorians, Child of Anger, etc. I was therefore expecting some kind of back door Praetorian research going on with the Rikti, possibly Mom Mayhem looking to turn the Lost against both Rikti and Primal Earth forces, so the revelation that this was all being done by one extreme individual doesn't add up.
Unless I've misunderstood what was going on in the sewer mission.
Best regards,
Virtue Server-
MA: (All SFMA, all technically long/very long, but all play quickly)
#200411 "Exploding Planet" (I apologize in advance for the final mission, but in all likelihood, the planet will explode.)
#144416 "Shadow of Grime Alley"
#161003 "You Don't Know Beanstalk, Jack"
Thanks for the Feedback, Zaphir!
I must admit patrol dialog in the 1st two missions was on my mental to-do list and it appears I lost it. I has going to have a few critters in the missions located in the Nexus comment on how the place looked so different just yesterday (this morning, an hour ago, whatever).
One of my concerns was that I was giving the player too much (optional) information to read through and I should cut back some. Sounds like you think it should be the other way. So, I will look at the maps and see if I can find a few to allow more details (like patrols) when I can.
Again, thanks!
Quote:
To address this round of concerns first...|
Originally Posted by Fantastic_Foe
Just played #459581, Kill or Cure by @Samuraiko
I have to rush through this review (getting family breakfast time aggro) I'll try to write something up that's more comprehensive later. Overall, I enjoyed the story, and how it progressed. I ran it with my MA/SR incarnate scrapper at baseline difficulty, and it was no problem. That's good for me, since I was in it for the story, and not a combat experience. I was able to stealth past many intervening mobs, since this was largely a detective style clue gathering experience. That was a good experience, overall. I'll present some nitpicks. I believe the objective chaining in the final mission. (SPOILER...) I encountered the defeated and dying Viviane at the front of the mission, on defeating the Rikti around her, the text implied I had cured her and I then escorted her to the front. I still had a goal to stop Dissolution from opening the portal, I assumed that Viv had set something in motion and I had to stop it. In the final room, I found Dissolution, still virus-striken and ready to open a portal to invade the Rikti homeworld with death. I defeated her, and the text clues implied that I should then cure her. I believe her defeat should have spawned the hostage/escort version of her. One other thing, in the Nemesis weather station mission, one objective was "Hear Dissolution's recorded message." (It was something like that.) I think a better clue would have been to generically imply that I needed to track down Dissolution. I went into the mission vaguely assuming that she would be on the map, and the mission goal removed that ambiguity by giving me advance knowledge that she had left me a recorded message. I enjoyed the arc, I'd play it again with some other of my characters. |
There are two versions of Dissolution in the final version - the cured version is SUPPOSED to only spawn after you've defeated her original version (unfortunately, not having total control over the game mechanics means I can't have her appear in exactly the same place, and we ALL know how wonky the placement systems is in the AE in the first place). Sometimes it just happens. I hate it, but it happens.
Re: her recorded message, you're not actually MEANT to find her on the map. The invisible version of Dissolution actually triggers what comes across as a recorded message heard over the intercom. (It's late, I'm tired, so I can't remember if it's triggered by you getting too close to her invisible version, or if it's when you mess with a particular canister - I think the latter.) Most of the time, once you deactivate a particular canister, she spawns, and because she's alone on the map, her message can be heard no matter where you are (hence the simulation of a recording).
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Fantastic_Foe
Okay, spoilers abound.
SPOILERS I briefly discussed the arc a few posts back. I have a few more points up for @samuraiko to consider. I missed the actual holographic recording of Dissolution at first. The clue said I had to find the recording of Dissolution, so I was looking for some kind of glowing communication terminal. Since Dissolution was nearly invisible, and since I was stealthing past most of the Nemesis, I missed her at first. Had the clue not unambiguously told me I was looking for a recording, I might have noticed the hostage/hologram (then again, I might not have.) The background information for the recording was the boilerplate details for a minion. In retrospect, I have some questions about the overall arc. The first two missions implies that whoever was behind the theft of SERAPH's Rikti research had tremendous resources, there was a clue indicating that the Malta were expecting to be paid in the multi-millions. The sewer mission had roving bands of old-school Mother Mayhem Praetorians, Child of Anger, etc. I was therefore expecting some kind of back door Praetorian research going on with the Rikti, possibly Mom Mayhem looking to turn the Lost against both Rikti and Primal Earth forces, so the revelation that this was all being done by one extreme individual doesn't add up. Unless I've misunderstood what was going on in the sewer mission. Best regards, |
The sewer mission is where you find what Dissolution is really up to, and how she got to be the way she is. She tried to join SERAPH - she was too young. She volunteered to help fight the Rikti - she was too young. Now she's grown up - and she's going to fight the Rikti herself. And thanks to the information she's now gotten from SERAPH, she's confirmed that she's on the right track to wipe out the Rikti completely.
As for where she gets her money, when Dissolution went to the Rogue Isles and word got around to people (namely the leader of the villain group she belongs to, as well as groups like Arachnos and Crey) that she could eliminate the Rikti entirely, they were QUITE happy to fund her work. As young as she is, this is all she's ever worked for. Nothing else matters.
If that meant raising millions to bribe the Malta and Knives into stealing tech, that's what she'd do. If that meant experimenting on the poor slobs that the Rikti were converting into the Lost, even if they'd never done anything wrong, that's what she'd do. The Rikti came within inches of destroying her world, so she's going to make them pay. And God help anyone who gets in her way in the process.
******
I'm sure the arc still needs tinkering, but the fundamental storyline is this - what happens when the heroes you look up to, the people who supposedly defend the freedom and rights of others, take away your freedom to choose to risk your own life, in the name of 'protecting' you?
Thanks for playing and for critiquing!
Michelle
aka
Samuraiko/Dark_Respite
Dark_Respite's Farewell Video: "One Last Day"
THE COURSE OF SUPERHERO ROMANCE CONTINUES!
Book I: A Tale of Nerd Flirting! ~*~ Book II: Courtship and Crime Fighting - Chap Nine live!
MA Arcs - 3430: Hell Hath No Fury / 3515: Positron Gets Some / 6600: Dyne of the Times / 351572: For All the Wrong Reasons
378944: Too Clever by Half / 459581: Kill or Cure / 551680: Clerical Errors (NEW!)
THE COURSE OF SUPERHERO ROMANCE CONTINUES!
Book I: A Tale of Nerd Flirting! ~*~ Book II: Courtship and Crime Fighting - Chap Nine live!
MA Arcs - 3430: Hell Hath No Fury / 3515: Positron Gets Some / 6600: Dyne of the Times / 351572: For All the Wrong Reasons
378944: Too Clever by Half / 459581: Kill or Cure / 551680: Clerical Errors (NEW!)
Quote:
Hey, thanks for the feedback.|
Originally Posted by Dark_Respite
To address this round of concerns first...
There are two versions of Dissolution in the final version - the cured version is SUPPOSED to only spawn after you've defeated her original version (unfortunately, not having total control over the game mechanics means I can't have her appear in exactly the same place, and we ALL know how wonky the placement systems is in the AE in the first place). Sometimes it just happens. I hate it, but it happens. Re: her recorded message, you're not actually MEANT to find her on the map. The invisible version of Dissolution actually triggers what comes across as a recorded message heard over the intercom. (It's late, I'm tired, so I can't remember if it's triggered by you getting too close to her invisible version, or if it's when you mess with a particular canister - I think the latter.) Most of the time, once you deactivate a particular canister, she spawns, and because she's alone on the map, her message can be heard no matter where you are (hence the simulation of a recording). |
My point with the two versions of Dissolution was that I encountered the cured version before the to-be-cured version. I assumed you wanted the cured version to spawn once the to-be-cured version was defeated, if that was the case, I'm just suggested you make sure that the mission still has that set up.
I've had missions where objectives were chained mysteriously change so that the objective chaining was lost, and all objectives appeared on the map when my character entered.
That's probably why I had the Hear Dissolution's Recording goal explicitly stated when I entered the Nemesis mission, it sounds like that objective was supposed to spawn when I cleared an objective.
Best regards,
Virtue Server-
MA: (All SFMA, all technically long/very long, but all play quickly)
#200411 "Exploding Planet" (I apologize in advance for the final mission, but in all likelihood, the planet will explode.)
#144416 "Shadow of Grime Alley"
#161003 "You Don't Know Beanstalk, Jack"
Just played Legacy of a Rogue #459586 by @Night-Girl.
I really enjoyed the story, the five missions were not overlong, and were filled with details that made me not want to just rush through.
It was particularly thematic for my level 50 Martial Arts/Super Reflexes scrapper, Playboy Avenger, since the mission feels like a Batman-inspired homage story.
It's something that I would recommend to my friends, in fact I *will* recommend to my friends.
I think there was one typo/grammar issue in the clue text associated with the Puzzlebox.
My only real complaint, I found the use of color in the mission text overused and distracting at times.
I have to head out to work now, but I'll try to write a more detailed review later.
Best regards,
Virtue Server-
MA: (All SFMA, all technically long/very long, but all play quickly)
#200411 "Exploding Planet" (I apologize in advance for the final mission, but in all likelihood, the planet will explode.)
#144416 "Shadow of Grime Alley"
#161003 "You Don't Know Beanstalk, Jack"
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Fantastic_Foe
Just played Legacy of a Rogue #459586 by @Night-Girl.
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A more detailed reaction to Legacy of a Rogue by @Night-Girl
SPOILERS...
There were several things about the mission arc that makes me want to re-evaluate my current arcs and see if I can incorporate things that I've seen. @Night-Girl really brought the contact's personal story into the missions. At one point, I was worried that Gertrude was actually the villainous force behind it all. I was relieved that she was not.
The story was such that I felt very personally involved as well, so I appreciated the emotional elements at the end of the arc. This is usually not the case with dev-generated content, so well done.
I enjoyed the historical relationships between Rogue Falcon, Harrier, Gertrude, and the Crimson Cricket, as well as the practical relationships between Azuria, Gertrude, and Carter.
Speaking of Azuria, thank you for using a drugged-out looking, cigarette smoking avatar for Azuria. In my personal lore for Azuria, she is obviously selling pieces of the Wheel of Destruction to the Banished Pantheon to support her addictions, and having in this arc an Azuria who looks like she stepped out of that mythology really made my day.
I think I mentioned that I enjoyed how mission end text, mission briefing text, entry and exit dialog popups all advanced the story, often describing visual events, but the popup that began mission 5 briefly confused me over what happened.
In mission two, the Harrier ally's clue text fired off as I entered the mission, but the context of the text implied I had just caught up to him. That's a problem with how Ally objectives and Hostage/Escort objectives are coded when they have no enemy mobs around them. It would be great if the clues and text fired when we got to them (I think their dialog text does fire off at that time, correctly.) You might want to re-write the clue or spam text to account for that, but it's no big deal.
One of the best things I found was the amount of commentary delivered by Harrier during the first two mission runs. In my arcs, most of the text generated by allies when they take damage are boring "I'm hurt!" type of statements, if I have them at all. I now see that a lot more can be done to reinforce character, personality, or plot.
My biggest complaint was the use of color in text. I think I wouldn't have minded when nouns were presented the first time, like Hawkmind, Crimson Cricket, etc. in color, but afterwards I don't think they needed to be. The green text is harder to read than the white, if you want to keep that, I'd suggest a lighter shade of green. I think I noticed one sentence where the entire sentence was a variety of colors, with only the word "the" in white. That jumped out as jarring. I'll be re-running the arc, because I really enjoyed it, and if I notice that sentence, I'll make a note of it and send you a direct message.
Looking forward to playing it again, bringing allies with me.
Best regards -
Virtue Server-
MA: (All SFMA, all technically long/very long, but all play quickly)
#200411 "Exploding Planet" (I apologize in advance for the final mission, but in all likelihood, the planet will explode.)
#144416 "Shadow of Grime Alley"
#161003 "You Don't Know Beanstalk, Jack"
Thanks for running and reviewing my arc, Fantastic Foe, and thanks to Bubbawheat for recommending it!
Quote:
It's funny, you can't actually use Azuria (or at least you couldn't when I made the arc, I'll have to check again), so I found the model that looked the most like her, and adjusted the coloring. Unfortunately, it had a cigarette, but hey, who says Azuria doesn't smoke? I think your personal lore is hilarious, and I'm amused that this situation led to her fitting it.|
Originally Posted by Fantastic_Foe
Speaking of Azuria, thank you for using a drugged-out looking, cigarette smoking avatar for Azuria. In my personal lore for Azuria, she is obviously selling pieces of the Wheel of Destruction to the Banished Pantheon to support her addictions, and having in this arc an Azuria who looks like she stepped out of that mythology really made my day.
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I didn't notice that the clue was given before you reached the allies; it may be that I missed that due to my main using stealth powers or something. I may end up having to put mobs around all my allies. I'll add it to my list of things to investigate my options for.
As for the text coloring, my early arcs used little to no coloring, and Dr. Aeon (before he was Dr. Aeon) recommended that I use more. You're not the only one to provide this feedback, so I think I went overboard. It's on my list of things to fix.
Thanks so much for running my arc. I'll try to find time to return the favor soon (the Summit is coming up, and I've got some preparation to do)!
Please try my custom mission arcs!
Legacy of a Rogue (ID 459586, Entry for Dr. Aeon's Third Challenge)
Death for Dollars! (ID 1050)
Dr. Duplicate's Dastardly Dare (ID 1218)
Win the Past, Own the Future (ID 1429)
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It was great fun.|
Originally Posted by Liquid
Thanks for running and reviewing my arc, Fantastic Foe, and thanks to Bubbawheat for recommending it!
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| It's funny, you can't actually use Azuria (or at least you couldn't when I made the arc, I'll have to check again), so I found the model that looked the most like her, and adjusted the coloring. Unfortunately, it had a cigarette, but hey, who says Azuria doesn't smoke? I think your personal lore is hilarious, and I'm amused that this situation led to her fitting it. |
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| Thanks so much for running my arc. I'll try to find time to return the favor soon (the Summit is coming up, and I've got some preparation to do)! |
Virtue Server-
MA: (All SFMA, all technically long/very long, but all play quickly)
#200411 "Exploding Planet" (I apologize in advance for the final mission, but in all likelihood, the planet will explode.)
#144416 "Shadow of Grime Alley"
#161003 "You Don't Know Beanstalk, Jack"
Just ran Police Woman's Agent of the OSS.
I thought it was great. I ran with my level 50 MA/SR scrapper, Playboy Avenger, and running him in his dashing street clothes gave him the Blackhawk-esque look that I wanted.
The NPC partner worked out very well.
There was great action, a nice collection and use of maps, particularly thematic for the mission genre.
Dialog-driven easter eggs abounded, which always entertains me.
I think someone in the posts above said it was over too quick, and I tend to agree. I think maybe some kind of red herring mission in the middle would provide a nice touch.
I have some friends with WW II-esque heroes, I'll mention this arc to them.
Best regards all,
Virtue Server-
MA: (All SFMA, all technically long/very long, but all play quickly)
#200411 "Exploding Planet" (I apologize in advance for the final mission, but in all likelihood, the planet will explode.)
#144416 "Shadow of Grime Alley"
#161003 "You Don't Know Beanstalk, Jack"
Nice to see this club still getting some action. Been busy with stuff myself, but will definitely be running a couple arcs soon. BTW, Fantastic Foe, do you want one of your arcs put on the front page for others to play? And welcome to the club.
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Thank you very much, I've been meaning to contribute in some way for awhile.|
Originally Posted by Bubbawheat
Nice to see this club still getting some action. Been busy with stuff myself, but will definitely be running a couple arcs soon. BTW, Fantastic Foe, do you want one of your arcs put on the front page for others to play? And welcome to the club.
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Sure, please put Shadow of Grime Alley #144416 on the front.
Thanks again,
Virtue Server-
MA: (All SFMA, all technically long/very long, but all play quickly)
#200411 "Exploding Planet" (I apologize in advance for the final mission, but in all likelihood, the planet will explode.)
#144416 "Shadow of Grime Alley"
#161003 "You Don't Know Beanstalk, Jack"
Arc Played: #517859: Crime is Art and Art is Crime, by @Twoflower
Character: Col. Liberty, L40 Broadsword/WP Scrapper
Overall: I enjoyed this arc a great deal. Good humor without devolving into immersion-breaking comedy. I was almost laughing too much to fight at Abe Lincoln's lines later in the arc.
I liked the customs, and the bosses seemed well-done power-wise (although it's hard to judge when running them on a nigh-invulnerable character at only 0/x1). Teddy is the only one that actually gave me any real injury, the self-rez made him an especially tough one. Liked it.
There was nothing I disliked in this arc and I've no suggestions or criticisms for you. I give it a Thumbs Up (5-stars).
@Doctor Gemini
Arc #271637 - Welcome to M.A.G.I. - An alternative first story arc for magic origin heroes. At Hero Registration you heard the jokes about Azuria always losing things. When she loses the entire M.A.G.I. vault, you are chosen to find it.