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(it's my age the memory goes first 
).
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How can you be sure? 
Dave, SB plx!
Thelonious Monk
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Dave, SB plx! [/color]
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Is that whipcrack sound you hear more likely to be:
a) me SBing you;
or
b) me taking inspiration from Indiana Jones to deliver a brutal form of buffer justice?
Actually there was a 3rd option but I guess the boards may be visited by minors...
By my mohawk shall ye know me!
my toons
Funny: Ee-Ai-Ee-Ai-Oh! #3662 * The foul-mouthed Handyman! #1076 * City of Norms #132944
Serious: To Save A Single World (#83744) * Marketing Opportunity (#83747)
I have to admit I also find it irritating as hell to be nagged for buffs when I consider myself to be a team player on any of my toons that have buffs.
By this I mean I will always dish out any buffs I have as often as I can to team members to the detriment of my attacks for example on my empath.
Strangely enough I found the most persistent nag the other day was a fellow empath who at every single hands turn demanded CM regardless of if they had it already or not, same said empath by the way was dishing out recovery aura to a team with full endurance and sometimes on top of a RA already given.
After about half an hour of nagging I had to point out that recovery aura was just that.......an aura to aid in recovery therefore not required by a team of people with full endurance already, at which stage I was told to 'you play yours your way and I will do the same'...which was a fantastic opener for me to totally agree with that sentiment therefore please stop nagging for clear mind every 5 seconds when you already have it....after which things went a little better.
The other side to this though is playing on a team with a kinetic who cuddles buffs as though to share one would be a violation of a personal playing code, I have bumped into the same kin a couple of times lately to the point where if pug'd into a mutual team I would have to leave and find a more enjoyable playing experience.
I have not asked for a SB for myself but I have asked that at least it be given to the tank and scrapper on one of the teams after we lost members a couple of times as the tank was struggling to recover, the response was 'I hate that power, I am speccing it out, I wish I never got it'....a numer of the team tried to advise the benefits of sharing said buff but we wasted our breath.
I hope that JD's recent observations of an increase in nagging is just a phase, if everyone gives a little time for a team to gel it should be obvious if you have a buffer who is going to dish out the goodies therefore no 'BUFFMEPLZ' required, or if you are unfortunate enough to have dropped into a team with a 'MINE...MINE I SAY and you are having none of my goodies, muawahahahaha' in which case better luck next time.
I mostly get harassed when I play my kins, especially if there's a stone brute, they always cry for SB, rightfully so.
I think you just encounter the same phenomenon I usually get when levelling my alts at odd (non-smurf) hours. I tend to get invited to the same "team" or "people" repeatedly for days or even weeks. If there's a n00b or otherwise annoying (k, that was slightly evil) person in that team, you'll soon begin to wonder if the game is full of'em.
...of course it could also be that you lack the skill to keeping the team buffed! 
Also at lower levels in PuG teams you sort of expect some people to lack knowledge and end up telling people what to do if they're unknown and untested. Then again, that just might be me, being a helpful teacher! 
As in pvp, the trick is to just completely ignore it. The regulars use skype, so I hardly even read the chat nowadays, except for the pvp ranting since that's usually rather amusing in small amounts!
Edit: But I doo soo love a good moan, and you did the job well my young padawan!
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Although about 2 weeks ago I did say 'attack the enemy plz' after having buffs demanded (whilst they were still in effect) gawd-knows-how-many-times. I don't think the team spotted this as sarcasm.
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I've answered "heal!" with "taunt!" & "attack!" before now..it seemed to shut them up.
I stopped playing my kin/ and my /kin, I couldn't stand the never-ending, constant whining for SB in teams.
I think what you said about this being a problem with inexperienced people holds true - having been on the other end of it, I would never ask for any kind of buff (except once, out of desperation, requesting the heal-aura-on-auto-and-brain-afk Empath I was teamed with, use CM now and then to prevent yet *another* team wipe) people who ask for buffs annoy me.
If you constantly spam for heals (just like the Orc I was playing with the other night in WAR) other than putting yourself in danger of going to the bottom of my buffing queue, you will have no effect on me whatsoever. You will not get healed because you ask; you will get healed when the great god who must be obeyed - The Little Green Bar -tells me to.
Same goes for any other buffs; they're my fingers hitting my keyboard, they move when I tell them too; no-one else.
heck, I'd better put a </rant> here! 
Apparently "You killed the anchor, deal with it" isn't the response people want when they demand heals. Turns out I don't have all the answers after all
"Well, they found my diary today.
They were appropriately appalled
at the discovery of the eight victims
They're now putting it all together.
Women wrapped in silk
with one leg missing
Eight legs, one body, silk,
spider, brilliant!"
I'm a rather patient person, so I give people the benefit of the doubt the first time whether giving ro receiving buffs or heals.
I will remind the buffers once if I seem to be being missed on buffs that are expected (bubbles etc.), if they forget me again or aren't doing their primary/secondary role I will let them know that I'm dissapointed and what I expected from them, they after that I will adapt my playstyle to cope without the the buffs or I will leave the team.
I accept that everyone has a different playstyle, everyone chooses different powers etc. but if I'm teaming with a FF defender, I have an expectation that I should be bubbled for at least 90% of the time.
I expect people to pull me up on my primary role if I'm not meeting their expectations, but I expect them to do it in a mature way, not a "do this plz" message.
Buffers get the rough end of the deal because it's easier to see if they're not doing their primary role than say a scrapper or a blaster.
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I stopped playing my kin/ and my /kin, I couldn't stand the never-ending, constant whining for SB in teams.
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This is exactly why I don't play my rad/kin defender any more. I was once offered a million inf (in the days when a million was actually worth something) if I kept the lead SB'd. I respectfully declined with the phoenetics of Foxtrot Oscar.
The problem with /kins is they are perceived to be a one-trick pony and it's really annoying having people bleat for SB when your work-rate's really high keeping the melee toons healed, the enemy debuffed, remembering who does and doesn't want SB... it's more of a pain than a boon to play.
Thelonious Monk
I rarely ask for buffs, but I do mourn when I don't get them but am gasping for them (for example when all my End runs out and the Kin hasn't SBed me). At that point I probably would say something alluding to my SB addiction, or the next time is is applied be extra gushing about how much I love it.
On my Kins the ropey framerate & trying to play at high speeds is what stopped me playing them, it was just too frantic, didn't notice / care about people calling for SB all the time.
My Warshade had a team with a Thermal and an Empathy on it a while back, both excellent buffers. Now that was lovely!
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I think what you said about this being a problem with inexperienced people holds true - having been on the other end of it, I would never ask for any kind of buff (except once, out of desperation, requesting the heal-aura-on-auto-and-brain-afk Empath I was teamed with, use CM now and then to prevent yet *another* team wipe) people who ask for buffs annoy me.
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As one of said inexperienced people, I would never ask for anything. I'm grateful when I get it, and thank politely, but if it's not there, I look out for myself a little more.
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Apparently "You killed the anchor, deal with it" isn't the response people want when they demand heals. Turns out I don't have all the answers after all
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Ain't that the truth. And when you point out that they keep doing it, do you get an apology? Yet they expect you to feel shame because you let their shield drop or your heal missed. By the way, one thing I'm not clear on : are you approaching this from the "You killed my anchor, so you can whistle for your heal" angle or is it more "If you didn't keep killing the anchor first you wouldn't *need* the heal, you spa"? Either way, I approve!
On my bubbler I don't mind so much being reminded to bubble on the odd occasions where I don't notice the bubbles have dropped, but on my dark and kin fenders when people don't understand that I am healing, I just keep missing because they insisted on bringing a level 46 defender with a hit-check heal on a 52/53 mob mission, I get a tiny bit irate.
That said, I've played a handful of scrappers, on a big team if I don't ask for the heal or a bubble I tend to get left to my own devices, whether I like it or not - by the time someone notices I'm in trouble it's too late. And they're on the other side of the map You play like you're soloing, people let you solo.
Well frankly if I lose my name I will quit the ga-, whoops - wrong rant.
I don't think it's entirely out of line for team members to occasionally say, "sb plz" as a reminder if I've forgotten as I play my Kin very aggressively on debuff and sometimes don't notice the end of an SB cycle. Same with any cheap and fast-recharging buff - CM springs to mind.
Demanding longer charging buffs like Fort isn't cricket in my book - the person with the power should be able to tell who gets the super buff. Anyone that does not like it needs to present a better argument than "FORT NWO!!!1"
On a side note - if folks want to get precious over about grammar, spelling or acronyms... well, they've chosen the Internet as the wrong place to hang out. "omgwtflolbbq plz kthxbai"
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The issue goes both ways, i have played a Cold Corruptor for god nows how many hundred hours and a FF defender to 50, it can be annoying when ppl ask for buffs when you are busy with something more important or just cant. But its equally annoying with a FF defender to damn lazy to bubble his team mates unless asked for it.
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This reminds me of something I forgot to ask in the OP:
* Is this behaviour mainly from players who haven't played a wide range of ATs/sets and just don't have a good appreciation of roles other than their own?
Or put another way: Is it from people who are selfish or don't know how to play other characters?
As I've said before, I've played a lot of characters/sets to high level - blueside I've at least one of each of the 5 basic ATs at 49+ with khelds not far behind. And these have been played traditionally (not PL'd) and usually in teams. Often large teams.
I spent probably 6 months between contracts running my own big teams on a daily basis.
I think I've got an at-least reasonable grasp of most roles/ATs/sets. I can see what I think I'd be doing. I can often pick up on the little things that other characters are doing that many may not notice (a side effect of watching out for leechers and watching buff icons/end/hlth for those in need).
But I very rarely feel the need to tell someone what to do or demand a buff. But at the same time that's because I can see what they're doing and if needed I'll adjust my own playstyle.
Adjusting your own play is always better than trying to dictate to (or get mad at) another player...
...so why the heck do buffers get shouted at with demands so often?
By my mohawk shall ye know me!
my toons
Funny: Ee-Ai-Ee-Ai-Oh! #3662 * The foul-mouthed Handyman! #1076 * City of Norms #132944
Serious: To Save A Single World (#83744) * Marketing Opportunity (#83747)