All right. I freaked and so did Livvy. Mr. Counsel was my friend and my legal representative. He was a father-figure to me now that Daddy had changed into Mitri. Seeing him like that
But when I took Livvy out of the den, she led me straight to the garage where we got into Mr. Counsels hybrid car and drove away. I know. I couldnt figure it out either. We just got in and took off. Livvy wasnt even upset anymore.
As we left the cul-de-sac, we passed two police cars that were coming in. Livvy slowed and watched them as they went by. The policemen didnt even look our way. Something weird was going on.
Officer Caine, she said like nothing had happened and we were just making a run to the mall. I spoke to him yesterday. Nice man.
Where are we going? I asked.
To deliver you, Livvy answered. Dont worry.
Oh, was all I replied and suddenly, I wasnt worried anymore.
She was a Jedi or something. Whatever she said, you did.
You werent really Mr. Counsels girlfriend, were you? Just because I was no longer worried didnt mean Id stopped thinking.
No, she said, I just met him a week ago.
Okay, that was a five-alarm answer. It was time to show this person who she was messing with here! Next stop-sign, I was going to quantum-blast her into another dimension!
I focused
felt for the familiar flow of subatomic particles through my body
and
Nothing. I felt nothing.
You used your powers of suggestion to keep me from using my powers, didnt you?
She smiled that motherly smile she always had and said, No, dear. I used a device your father designed to analyze and neutralize your powers. I cut you off from the energy you access.
Desperate, I drew back my elbow to try and shatter the glass in the door so that I could jump out.
Dont do that, she said, and I didnt.
We drove for a while longer and I didnt say or do anything else. She didnt say anything either. Before long we pulled up to a gate with a security guard. The guard had a badge that said Crey Security on it. Why is it always Crey?
Livvy said, Sleep
((This was also written by Ryan's player. ))
I was under arrest, being led out of the house in handcuffs. Tami was out there somewhere with whoever Ms. Post actually was, and she was probably in danger. There weren't any good choices here, but there was one obvious one.
Officers, I said, With all due respect
I did a full-body freeze-over. Bullets hurt, but Id been out heroing with Tami enough to know that theyre not much good against super-dense ice. Neither are handcuffs. They froze over and I snapped them pretty easily. Getting away was slow because Ive never been a great runner and being coated in ice doesnt help much. A few bullets ricocheted off of me before I made it to the edge of the woods that bordered the cul-de-sac.
Luckily for me, frost was already forming on the ground and on me. It must have been a cool night. I built up a thick enough coating of ice to make myself less person-shaped and layer of opaque frost quickly formed on it. I curled up beside a big oak tree and they passed me a couple times without seeing anything other than a big, frost-covered rock.
I waited like that for an hour or more before there were no more flashlights and shouting, then I defrosted and sat down against the tree. Now what? Usually Tami makes the plans and I just stand around and hit things... not that that would help much now.
Thinking back, I should have seen a lot of this coming. There were plenty of signs that "Ms. Post" didn't live in that house. There weren't any of her spare coats or shoes in hall closet, things like that. But thinking about that wasn't going to help anything. Figuring it out then might not have either.
So... planning. How was I going to find Tami now?
Tami, I said, knowing she couldnt hear me, but wishing she could, Hang on. Ill find you. I promise.
Wake up. Livvy said it and I did it. I woke up.
Gyah! I hated her! What had ever made me see her as the least bit motherly?
You may ask a question, she said.
I knew I had to choose my question well, because she had said a question, singular.
Why did you kidnap me? I figured that question might encompass a few other questions I had such as, why did you kill Mr. Counsel, and, who are you working for?
Profit.
Dang it! She was good!
I was sitting in a leather office chair with a high back. My arms were held to the chair arms with plastic ties. My shoes had been untied and retied around the chairs pedestal base.
Murder was never part of the plan, someone a man said. I knew that voice who was it? Whoever it was, he was behind me.
It never is, as far as were concerned, another man answered, but in our business, we have to be flexible. Spilled milk and cracked eggs, you see.
Of course, said the first man and now I recognized his voice. Its just that Greg was a long-time family associate. It was Michael Martin Sr.
Yes, but when the family split, he chose the wrong side, did he not?
I didnt recogniz the other man, but his voice no, not his voice, his tone sent shivers up my spine.
Gentlemen, Livvy said looking over my head, You can argue the details later, but I have a plane to catch. I have only delivered half the package. The other part remains in Paragon City.
Mitri. She had to be talking about Mitri. Thank goodness we werent getting along. Otherwise she might have taken us both together. At least this way maybe he can avoid being captured. Maybe.
Livvy left the room and my chair got spun around so that I was facing Michael and the other man.
Hey, Michael, whos this, I said with as much snark as a girl my age can dredge up from the most sarcastic corners of her soul, your new boyfriend?
There was a time when if I said something like that Id see the anger rise up in his neck until the veins stood out and looked like they were going to sprout little buds of hate all over his face. This time he just laughed at me. That ticked me off.
Tami, Tami, Tami
He leaned down and got right in my face. Nothing you say matters anymore. You, my dear, are no longer a person.
Okay that really ticked me off.
And my associate here, Michael continued, his voice just dripping with condescending condescension, is Albert Saint-John-Worsterfield.
Except Michael pronounced it, Senjenwersheld. I saw the actual spelling of the name a minute later when Michael and Mr. Saint-John-Worsterfield signed a contract that finalized the sale of my fathers company, Sovtek, to Mr. Saint-John-Worsterfields employer, Crey Industries.
Done and done, Mr. Saint-John-Worsterfield Ill just call him Albert said after they signed. All of Sovteks capital assets, patents, and research results now belong to C.I., and you, Mr. Martin, are 900 million dollars richer.
You cant do that! I said, straining to pull my arms free, wishing I knew where they had the device hidden that was neutralizing my powers. You cant do that! Sovtek doesnt belong to you! It belongs to me and
I almost spilled the beans that Mitri wasnt a clone, but was, in fact, our de-aged father.
To you? Albert said with a mean laugh. My dear, you dont own anything. In fact, I own you.
What?
Its all here in these papers
I looked. They were the papers we had forged to pass off Mitri as a clone of Daddy instead of Daddy de-aged.
See? Albert said, pointing at some figures and diagrams. The energy signature of this clone matches the energy we have neutralized in you. That indicates to me that you are both creations of the same process. According to this document, 'Quantum Manipulation Cloning Techniques,' you are both clones. And as anyone familiar with C.I. knows, we consider clones to be company property.
((Season 3, Episode 13!))
The theme to "Serv'd!" played as the opening credits rolled.
Hephaestus 1 arrived at his desk to find a few more unopened birthday cards from the other departments.
"You turn fifty and all of a sudden it turns from birthday cards to condolence cards," the big blue cyborg said to his teammates as they arrived.
"My wife and children and I enjoyed the staff party," the Paperwork Ninja said. "I do apologize for stepping out for a moment, I was feeling a little claustrophobic."
"Well, when you try to fit about forty adults, eight kids and two cats into the apartment it gets really cramped," Heph said.
Agent Munin nodded. "That hot sauce and chicken cheese dip was very shiny, Heph. Where did you find the recipe?"
"Eh, it's someone from back home who made it and I just estimated it from there," Heph shrugged.
After thirty minutes or so Patrolman Fang walked in, checking a PDA on a few things. "Hey guys, I was wondering if you had any case information on a specific super-powered traffic scofflaw."
"Who is it?" the Paperwork Ninja asked.
"He goes by the name of the Grey Geist," Fang said. "I'm looking his information up to do sme work on some cold-case files."
The Paperwork Ninja looked over to Heph and Munin. "Give me a few minutes and I'll have his records ready for study."
Heph nodded. "Get on it. Meet us in the conference room on the second floor and we'll go over it." He motioned to Munin and Fang to follow him. "What's the deal with this guy, Fang?"
Fang shrugged. "Well, it's an odd story..."
"Odd stories are usually the best," Munin said.
Half an hour later, the team re-assembled at the conference room. "All right, crew, here's the last file footage we have of this Grey Geist person from the last time he was in Paragon City," Heph said as he played the video file. Patrolman Fang, Agent Munin, and the Paperwork Ninja sat at the conference table and watched.
A half-sized turretless tank crawled its way into the camera view of the Atlas Park Mighty Mart, which then bumped into a few compact cars and blatantly double parked in the handicapped spots. The hatch on top of the tank opened up and an old man in old tweed hunting jacket and breeches clambered out and gracefully made his way into the convenience store. Meanwhile, two cars with handicapped plates stopped, having to wait for the miniature tank to leave. As the old man exited the store with a 64-ounce Mighty Ice, Heph stopped the video.
"That's him," Heph said. "The Grey Geist, apparently also known in the 40s as the head of the Luftwaffe's Dancing Paratroopers. The Tanzkommandant. And now he owes Paragon City a quarter million dollars in unpaid parking fines because of antics like this."
"He used to be the Tanzkommandant?" Fang asked in a tone that sounded like he was faking being surprised. "We have to catch him for that alone, Heph!"
"Sorry, Fang," Heph said. "You can't come along. He's now a ballroom dance instructor at Aeon University in the Rogue Isles. That's outside your jurisdiction. However, we here at the district courts have gotten an agreement for extradition to Paragon City, where he'll appear in traffic court to pay those fines."
"We'll bring him back, Fang, don't worry," Agent Munin said. "We haven't flubbed a service yet."
"Yeah, but this is kinda personal," Fang said. "For a guy like Patrolman Fang this is no big deal... but for a guy like Arnold Z. Lubawicz to catch the Tanzkommandant?" Fang asked, prominently showing his uniform's name plate of "A. Lubawicz" to Munin. "It would be awesome."
Munin nodded. "Yeah, I can see why it's personal."
Heph sighed. "I got it, Fang, don't worry."
"He's got a quarter million in parking fines, a complaint filed by Captain Fashionable for disrupting a costume contest in front of City Hall and an outstaning ticket for parking that litle tank of his on the right foot of the Atlas statue," Fang said. "That's not personal."
"No," Heph said, "but there's other stuff there, too. I had a similar discussion a few nights back with another young hero."
"Oh," Fang said.
"So right now this is my case, Fang. You'll get your chance once I'm done, got it?" Heph asked.
"Well, hurry up then," the diminuitive werewolf said. "It's taken long enough. This guy has to be caught."
"Right, right," Heph said as the scene cut to a commercial.
Back Yard Boom - Emo Catgirl - Cobalt Claymore - Hephaestus 1
Avatar by Scarf_Girl!
*faints* Oh my.....er...I'm still not going to say omg (D'oh
) But seriously, that's awesome! And err.....not just becuase I was involved in roleplaying my dismay about a Nazi dance teacher. Kick his Grey butt!
Paragon City:
Olivia Post
Id never liked Paragon City.
Twenty years ago, I called it home. I was the leader of a secret criminal cabal that shall remain nameless. Movers and shakers, we were, with covert operatives in several organizations, including one prominent crime-fighting supergroup. I was nameless as the cabals leader, an eminence grise who worked through my puppets, never seen, but always directing and overseeing our interests. I was a shadow of a shadow. Those were good times.
Now, with superfolk swarming the entire northeast in ridiculous numbers, I was reduced to corporate espionage. How the mighty have fallen.
And here I was, in this town Ive come to hate. Fortunately, it doesnt take long for the device I was supplied with to detect the clones energy signature. I finally found him at Cookes Electronics in Steel Canyon and followed him back to Kings Row, to an alley beside a T.V. repair shop
The Kings Row laboratory/workshop of Dmitri Mitri Martinov:
Mitri
Id been working through the night and into the afternoon on my experiment, stopping only long enough to make a run to Cookes to pick up a part Id ordered. Since Id discovered the new particles (I named them tams after Tami), Id be able to bring my ideas for quantum manipulation cloning techniques to fruition. If I could only create a duplicate that would be able to maintain a tam particle matrix and thus retain a stable, functioning form outside of the lab, there would be numerous practical applications. Cellular regeneration cloning techniques would be obsolete!
The lab. It and its location had made my discovery possible. I had needed a facility located deep enough below the ground to help filter out the noise particles from cosmic and solar radiation. After a chance conversation with a security guard at the Rock, Id found this place and it was perfect!
As I said, I had been working through the night and into the afternoon when I heard someone enter the lab. It was an attractive middle-aged woman.
How did you get in here? I said.
Olivia Post
I told the lady up front the one with the wings and mask that I needed to see you and she told me where I could find you.
The clone was handsomely boyish. I could never understand why Crey had always insisted on using their science to try to make some sort of super-army when it would be much more profitable to simply sell unpowered clones for personal use. Thats what I would do. I imagine there are quite a few wealthy men who would pay a pretty penny for a young, healthy clone of myself.
You should leave, now, the young clone said.
But you want me here, I said, and saying, I knew he did.
Mitri
There was something about her voice
it was
persuasive.
Yes, I do, I found myself saying. I almost invited her to make herself comfortable.
You will come with me now, peacefully, she said.
It was as if my will was broken. I realized that anything she said, I would do. I had no choice. I wanted to use my powers to subdue her, but I found myself following her to the door. Still I could do something...
Olivia
He was easy. Men always are.
Since he was docile, I decided to take a look around the room. It looked very similar to Dr. Martinovs lab in Virginia. Obviously, this clone shared his creators intellect. Amazing. This was far beyond any clone-creating technology I had ever seen. He followed me around the lab, answering when I asked him about the function of a specific piece of equipment. He even uploaded his computers hard drive onto my netbook.
The back corner of the room was dominated by a large machine that flashed with pulsating rings of light.
"What is that?" I asked.
Mitri...
Its a tam particle matrix initiator, I asked, Would you like to see it work?
I could tell by the look on her face that she was intrigued.
Tell me what it does, she said, and of course, I did.
It creates tam particle matrices.
And what are tams?
The answer would fill volumes if I went into detail, so I began, The entire universe exists in a quantum state, that is at its smallest measurable level, the universe
Show me what it does, she said, exactly as Id hoped she would
Olivia
I needed to know. As far as I was concerned, this equipment was all property of Crey Industries, and the more of their toys I returned to them, the better my payoff would be.
I watched the clone work at the computer for a moment, and then step up onto the platform that surrounded the machine. The rings of light expanded so that they enveloped him. He began to crackle with energy.
Thats enough, I said, but he must not have been able to hear me because he did not stop. Come out of there!
He did not.
I couldnt let him power up or whatever it was he was doing. Id stop him even if I had to grab him out of the machine!
I leapt upon the platform and grabbed his arm. A warm tingle ran through my body and I realized I was enveloped in the light also
Mitri
Ha! She did exactly as I wanted. Perhaps she had uncanny powers of persuasion, but I was still smarter! The light enveloped her and she was instantly confused.
I wish Id had time to set the machine so that it would have shot us to the Between. There, I could have stranded her until I figured out a way to deal with her. As it was, the machine was set to create copies.
In seconds, there were four of us standing on the platform.
Stop her! I said to my duplicate. But she her mind was quick and cunning.
All of you dont do anything, she said calmly.
We all stood still while she stepped off of the platform and looked at us.
You boys come on down, she said, and we did, leaving her own duplicate standing in the light.
She stood and looked at herself. The duplicate was younger, the age I currently was, as the machine had been set for.
I said, If you dont get her out of there, the machine will cycle again and create another.
The woman nodded and told her duplicate to step down. There she stood as if looking into that magic mirror that everyone over the age of thirty wishes they could have.
Youre beautiful, she said with a smile.
The duplicate, as it had been instructed to do, did nothing as the woman looked wistfully at her, not even flinching as she stroked its face.
My god, youre perfect, the woman said, entranced with her own youth. Youre me.
Olivia
Suddenly I became aware. I looked at the older me and said, You cannot speak. The look on her face was priceless.
I looked down on myself. My skin was smooth and perfect like a porcelain doll. Parts of me that had gone south were perky and firm again. I looked around the lab. There was no way I was leaving here wearing the ill-fitting clothes of the middle-aged cow standing before me.
You, I said, addressing the male clone with clothes on, I need something to wear out of here. Do you have anything onhand?
He nodded and went to a locker that was hidden in the wall. From inside he took a short dress and a pair of black boots.
Tamaras? I asked.
He shook his head.
You have a girlfriend?
He nodded.
Sweet. I slipped the dress over my head and smiled as it slid effortlessly over my chest and stomach I was so slender now and pulled the boots on, then said, The one of you that is dressed, come with me. You other one, get rid of her something where Ill never see her again.
I couldnt bring myself to tell him to outright kill her. Im not suicidal.
((Season 3 Episode 13, part 2!))
When the commercial break ended, Heph was seen entering the old records room in the courts building, looking through the old stacks for a particular binder filled with court information. He pulled it off of the shelf and began thumbing through it. As he did, a shadow seemed to grow on the wall of the archive room.
"This is an odd place for a meeting," the shadow said. "Couldn't you have called on my cell phone?"
"Important stuff," Heph said. "I need transportation into Cap Au Diable."
"And so you called me," the shadow said.
"I'm looking for getting there in a subtle manner. I've got to deliver a bunch of summons to the Gray Geist."
"He used to be The Tanzkommandant," the shadow said.
"Yes, that's what I hear these days," Heph said. "Anyway, I need myself, Munin and my recording team transported to Cap while our window of opportunity is good."
"You'll be too recognizable when you arrive, Heph," the shadow said. "People will be hunting you left and right."
"I've got that covered, too. My paperwork ninja is on the case."
"A carefully-constructed paper trail isn't going to help you. You're what, one of three Hephaestus-class cybershells?" the shadow asked.
"I've got that aspect taken care of as well. Just trust me on this, okay?" Heph asked. "What's your fee?"
"Ten percent of the bounty," the shadow said.
"I don't get a bounty for bringing this guy in," Heph said.
"No, ten percent of the bounty on you in Cap," the shadow said.
Heph brought up Arachnos' "Most Wanted Celebrities" list and took a look at the bounty placed on him.
"I'm worth HOW MUCH to them?" Heph asked incredulously. "All of that because I made Arbiter Sands look like a chump?"
"He's sensitive," the shadow said.
"Well, it's highway robbery, but I don't have any choice. Fine, I'll pay it."
"And an additional ten percent to get you out," the shadow said.
"What? Why?"
"Knowing you like I do, Heph, the extraction will occur only after you're finding yourself being chased by the entire campus of Aeon University."
"That's outrageous," Heph said.
"Okay, okay, eight percent. That's because you've helped me through some major life-changing events," the shadow said.
"Eight percent? No, just get me in. My team and I can get out with no problem," Heph said.
"All right, it's your funeral. You'll get the directions on where to meet up once you stop recording," the shadow said.
"Oh, right," Heph said.
The camera faded out. When it faded back in, Heph was back at his desk, speaking with The Mysterious Doctor Nambu, the mad engineer who created his cybershell.
"I think the disguise system will be perfect, Michael," Doctor Nambu said. "They'll never believe it's you. I am also impressed with your paperwork ninja's ability with obtaining proper identification cards on such short notice."
"Well, the Village Hidden in Bureaucracy is known for its ability to get things done through proper filing of forms," Heph said. "I'm ready to field test the system, too."
Doctor Nambu nodded and handed Heph a box. "Here's the final piece of the disguise. Put it on and you should do all right."
Heph opened the box and gasped. A bright light glowed from inside the box. "It's... awesome..."
"I knew you'd like it," Doctor Nambu said.
The scene faded out and back in to Heph, Agent Munin and Heph's faithful recording crew Mitch and Clem arriving on a cargo ship into the Port Oakes dockyards.
"Em, I'll need you and our paperwork ninja to work on maintaining an informational security barrier. You'll also need to provide provide covering fire if I need to get out quickly, Em. Mitch, Clem, you two will need to work the remote cameras this time."
"Got it, Heph," Agent Munin said as she disappeared into the shadows.
"Right," Mitch nodded. Clem didn't say much.
"All right, wish me luck. We're going to see if I can make it past the security drones on the Port Oakes to Cap Au Diable ferry."
Heph walked down the gangplank in his disguise: a well-pressed pair of khakis, casual shoes, an Aeon U. School of Engineering sweatshirt complete with "Caution: Science Happening" warning, and a Chicago White Sox baseball cap that fit his head perfectly. A few of the longshoremen looked at Heph then shrugged.
"Don't that look like Hephaestus 1?" one longshoreman said.
"Nah, that ain't him," the other longshoreman explained. "Hephaestus-class cybershells can't wear hats. They fall off too easy. Ever'body knows that!"
"Oh," the first longshoreman said. "You gotta point."
Heph smiled inwardly. The disguise was perfect.
Heph made his way onto the Port Oakes ferry with no trouble. The scene faded out again. When it came back, the Gray Geist was standing rigidly in front of his class. Heph and a heavily-tattooed young man with flare goggles, chains wrapped tightly around his arms and shoulders and a shaggy red mohawk both stood in front of the class.
"Today we have two late additions to our ballroom dancing class," the old teacher said. "While I hate late additions, it does balance out the ratio between men and women in the class. Let's see here... hmm. O'Flanagan... Michael O'Flannagan?" the Gray Geist said. Heph faceplamed immediately.
"Here," the wildly-dressed young man said. "This should give me enough credits to be considered full-time this semester."
"Yes, another person who doesn't want to learn to dance because it's an important artistic expression," the Gray Geist complained. "And next... ah, a fellow Deutschlander! Bueller?"
Heph looked over. "That's me."
"Ah, yes, Ferrous Bueller. From Engineering."
"We're working on some new machine balance systems, and what better way to test their limits than through Western Civilization's finest non-verbal artistry?"
"Well, Herr Bueller," the Gray Geist said.
"I'm from Winnetka," Heph lied.
"Yes. You seem familiar, like a certain tv star named Hephaestus 1?"
"That's impossible!" Heph said. "He can't wear a hat like I can," he said, pointing to the baseball cap atop his black and blue metal cranium.
"Hmm. You're right. My apologies," the Gray Geist said. "But you must both understand that on this floor, my word is law. I give the orders here."
"All right," Heph and the other O'Flannagan said.
"Who gives the orders here?" the Gray Geist asked.
"All right!" Heph said "It's you. Happy?"
"Pleased as punch, having once been called Tanzkommandant by my friends and my soldiers." the Geist said. "Now, everyone, choose a partner and prepare. Today we'll be going through one of the most graceful dances ever, the waltz. Now, positions!"
Everyone lined up. Heph was stuck with a girl who couldn't have been more than five feet tall.
"This will be difficult," Heph said.
"Tell me about it. I have to touch an engineering student," the girl shot back.
The strains of Johann Strauss began. "ONE- TWO- THREE-" the Grey Geist barked as the students made their way inexpertly through the dance. When it ended, Heph bowed to his partner, removing his baseball cap for flourish.
The Grey Geist's expression changed to one of shock. "You- but you said- but you aren't-"
Heph's partner looked at the big blue cyborg, her eyes flashing with fire. "Ferrous Bueller, you're a hero!"
"Yep," Heph said, "caught by my own sense of decorum." Heph scrambled quickly for his messenger bag, handing the Gray Geist a sheaf of papers and slapping a teleport beacon on the old man's back. "See you in traffic court, Geist!"
With that, Heph ran for the door, and the screen faded to commercials.
Back Yard Boom - Emo Catgirl - Cobalt Claymore - Hephaestus 1
Avatar by Scarf_Girl!
===COMMERCIAL BREAK!===
The camera fades in on a nice little storefront in Talos Island, with the name "Tower Bakery" emblazoned on the windows and awnings. A passerby walks past, stops, then looks at the baked goods in the window.
"I should head in," the passerby says. He opens the door, takes a deep breath.
"Mmm... bread."
That's when there's AN EXPLOSION! and everything goes over to a voice-over.
"MORNINGS MORNINGS MORNIIIIIINGS!"
The passerby is knocked on his butt, suprised and alarmed.
"TOWER BAKERY BRINGS YOU THE FINEST IN BREAKFAST GOODS!"
There's another noise of an explosion and the screen switches to a picture of the doughnut counter and coffee station.
"DOUGHNUTS! COFFEE! COPS LOVE BOTH!"
The screen switches to a picture of Hephaestus 1 and Patrolman Fang each holding a doughnut and a cup of coffee. Then there's another explosion.
"PPD APPROVED FOR BREAKFAST!"
The screen switches to another picture of Patrolman Fang giving a thumbs-up.
"WE EVEN MAKE THE FINEST BAGELS FRESH EVERY MORNING!"
The screen switches to an explosion and the word "L'CHAIM!" spins into view.
"AND IT'S NOT JUST DOUGHNUTS, EITHER! TASTE OUR BREAD! TASTE IT!"
The screen explodes and switches to a picture of Nico and Bryan Tower, the owner and his son, dueling with with baguettes.
"BREAD GOOD! TOWER BREAD--"
The screen explodes again and the word "AWESOME!!!" spins into view.
"AWESOOOOOOOME! BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE!"
There's another explosion.
"WE MAKE CAKES!"
There's another explosion and the picture switches to Meg Tower, Bryan's mom, decorating a cake.
"OUR CAKE SPECIALIST MAKES BIRTHDAYS, RETIREMENTS, AND CELEBRATIONS MEMORABLE!"
The screen switches to a picture of a cake with the words "Happy Retirement, Stanley!" on it. There is also a wailing guitar solo.
"OUR SPECIAL OCCASION CAKES ARE SO AWESOME THEY'RE MËTÄL, BUT DO WE MAKE WEDDING CAKES? YES!"
There's another explosion and a beautiful wedding cake spins into view.
"A LIFETIME OF LOVE STARTS WITH CAKE!"
The screen explodes again, switching to one of Nico and Meg Towers' wedding photos. Which is surrounded on screen by smaller but still awesome explosions.
"AND JUST REMEMBER WHAT THEY SAY ABOUT BIG BAKERS AT TOWER BAKERY!"
The screen switches to Bryan and Nico showing they're both well over six feet tall.
"BIG BAKERS MAKE BIIIIIG BREAD!"
There's yet another explosion and guitar solo. The screen switches back to a slightly-singed passerby, who's holding a doughnut and a cup of coffee as he stumbles out of Tower Bakery with a baguette under his arm.
"Tower Bakery, at the corner of Phillips and Lewis streets in Talos Island. Open at 6am daily for breakfast. BE THERE!!!!"
The screen fades to the next and likely less-awesome commercial.
Back Yard Boom - Emo Catgirl - Cobalt Claymore - Hephaestus 1
Avatar by Scarf_Girl!
Some hours passed. I dont know how many. I was placed in a holding cell some sort of special room where they contained potentially dangerous objects, which was all I was to them now an object.
I had to figure out how they were neutralizing my powers. Livvy did it somehow, with one of Daddys devices, and whatever the device was, it continued to function even after she left me. That means that either Albert and company now have control over the device or that it was in something I ate at Mr. Counsels house and it is now inside of me.
I spent the next twenty minutes puking in my holding cell. If it was in my stomach, then it had to be out by now, because I was completely empty and felt like I was going to die. It was the single grossest things Ive ever done, but it was nothing compared to what I had to do next. I held my nose and looked through the mess on the floor for something out of the ordinary. If I wasnt completely purged, Id have gotten sick again. As it was, I just heaved as I went.
And I found nothing.
If it was in something I had eaten, it had moved on. Or passed into my blood.
Things could not possibly get any worse.
Then the cell door opened and they did.
Hello, Auntie.
It was Mikey Jr. all dressed up in that stunningly heroic looking Sovtek armor Daddy had made for him and Peter. He was crimson and gold with big golden metal wings that were designed to scoop hydrogen out of the air as they flapped to provide fuel for the micro-fusion engine that powered it. It was awesome and powerful, and before I really got to know what kind of person Mikey was, he was my hero when he put the armor on.
Now I hated him.
Hi, Mikey, I said, doing my best to sound cold and indifferent.
He looked around the cell and noticed the mess, then noticed my hands.
Christ, Tami, what have you been doing?
What do you care?
Im sure he smirked behind the mask when he said, Youre right. I dont. Except that I expected to find you clean.
What does it matter? His tone, even filtered through the helmets mic had a creepy kind of edge to it that made my skin crawl.
Oh, I had some time to kill. I thought Id come entertain myself with you.
The creep! The sleazeball! As if!
I knew you were a perv! Im your aunt! I said. If he tried anything, I was going to fight him with everything I had. Hed have to kill me.
Mikey laughed. Tami, youre nothing to me now. Not even human really. You might as well be made of rubber and wires.
Ohhhhhh! When I got my powers back I was going to
Michael? said another voice Alberts voice.
Mikey snapped around, stood almost like a soldier at attention. Yes, sir! he said, and I realized he was a soldier now, for Crey. Daddys magnificent armor would be used for evil.
I hope you are not bothering my Rogue Atom here, Albert said, She is an important part of the deal and I would not see her tampered with.
No sir, Mikey said, I was just finding out why she was sick.
Liar.
Albert looked past him and saw the mess. Take her down the hallway and get her cleaned up.
Oh no
Yes, sir! Mikey said, grabbing my arm and pulling out of the cell.
((Again, thanks to Ryan's player for this contribution! 
))
I lost track of how long I sat under that tree thinking. With nothing to go on but her alias, looking for Ms. Post would be a waste. Mr. Counsel had to have known something, at least why he and Tami might be targets, but talking to him obviously wasn't going to happen. Still, he might have something relevant in his files if I could get at them. I knew he had an office downtown somewhere. That was something.
Without any better leads, I set off looking for a pay phone with a phone book. He had to have a listing. By now it had started raining, the water freezing as it hit the ground or trees. I tried to be inconspicuous, but that gets tough when you're wandering around at night in the rain without a coat and with a layer of ice forming. I didn't see anyone though, which was a relief.
It didn't take long to find a copy of the yellow pages and look up Mr. Counsel. I checked the book's map and headed off. Walking downtown probably wasn't the smartest idea, especially if the police were still looking for me, but I didn't know how much time I had or what else I could do. If nothing else, walking would keep me busy for a while.
I didn't know much about the city beyond what I'd seen from the car, and I didn't remember the map half as well as I'd hoped I would, so it was pretty late - early, really - before I found the place. It was a nice older building, four floors, only a few blocks away from Capitol Square. The door was locked, and opening it would probably trigger an alarm of some sort. I stood there a moment, considering. Part of me wanted to wait until the place opened and ask someone, but given Mr. Counsel's state, that it was Christmas morning, and that I was already wanted, that didn't seem likely to work. I took a deep breath and pushed the door open. This would have to be fast.
A sign by the stairs said Mr. Counsel's office was on the second floor. I went straight up and knocked the door open. There was a desk for his secretary and some chairs in the waiting area or whatever it's called, but nothing useful. I opened the door to his actual office the same way, anxiousness making me use more force than necessary and do more damage to the door than I'd intended. No time to worry about that though. I looked around quickly, taking in the file cabinets, bookshelves, desk... and safe. That seemed the best place to start. Some ice and a stone hammer got the safe open without much trouble, and I grabbed everything inside that looked related to the Martinov/Martins. Hurrying doesn't exactly come naturally to me, and I had no idea how much time I had left. It hadn't taken long for the police to get to Mr. Counsel's house, and they had to expect me to come here eventually. I looked out the window. It faced a back parking lot that at this hour was still empty. I was pretty sure I could hear sirens in the distance, so I jumped. Overdramatic, sure, but it worked.
Down in the parking lot I gathered up a few papers that had blown loose as I fell and took off. The rain had stopped, leaving a dense fog behind. As far as I was concerned, lower visibility was great. I could definitely hear sirens as I snuck away, so my timing was pretty good. Now I just had to hope I'd found something worthwhile.
I found a storm drain to hole up in until things died down and read through everything I'd taken, or at least as much as I could translate out of legalese. Tami's adoption hadn't been official, but I knew that already. From the sound of it, Crey had been trying to buy Sovtek out from under Tami while things with the will were still tangled up in court.
It seemed like a long shot, but if Crey was involved that might be a good place to start.
Mikey weighs about 180 without the armor, and hes in good shape, so with his strength augmented and his vulnerable areas covered by a lightweight aluminated titanium alloy augmented by a variable quantum field, I had no chance of pulling out of his grip. I had a pretty good idea of what he had in mind, but lets give him the benefit of a doubt and say that he was going to turn me over to a nice old lady who would help me clean up. I still wanted to get away, so I said:
Dyeviat, syem, dva, dva, Prokhorov.
That probably doesnt mean much to you. It doesnt mean a whole lot to me. Daddy tried to get me to learn Russian, but I just never saw the point to it. Spanish. French. Japanese. Something that people around the world actually use. But I did learn this one phrase because it was Daddys failsafe. Im not sure why. It must have had some sort of signicance. Nine, seven, two, two, famous Russian scientist.
Anyway, I said it and Mikey said, What the f
Well
you dont really have to know exactly what he said. Besides he didnt get it all out before the audio unit shut down. I gave him a push and he tilted against the wall, which worked out well for me because a loud thud would have brought people out to see what happened.
So, there I was smelly, but free. I knew in which direction the people I needed to avoid were, so I took off the opposite way.
The hallways were like a maze. Every corner I turned, my heart raced with fear that I would run into someone, but I listened, and if I heard voices, I always went the other way. I knew what I was looking for, and after what seemed like forever, but was really probably just a couple of minutes, I found it an empty office with a telephone. I had maybe two chances to call out before Id draw unwanted attention.
The first problem was should I call a nine or an eight to get an outside line? Most phone networks use one or the other. Fifty-fifty chance. I dialed nine.
Ryans cell rang four times, and when an unfamiliar voice answered, I ended the call right away. Who was it? Was Ryan a prisoner here somewhere? I had been so wrapped up in my own situation that I hadnt thought about him being in danger too. Gosh
Im so selfish.
There was no way I was calling 9-1-1 with Crey involved. There was only one other person in the area whose cell phone number I knew. I called my friend Ginger.
((Season 3, Episode 13, Part 3!))
When the show returned from commercials, Hephaestus 1 was found running through the streets of Cap Au Diable with not just his class of Aeon University students, but also a team of Arachnos Controller robots led by Arbiter Sands and a giant red demonic ball of lightning.
"You're on my turf now, Dorothy! WELCOME TO OZ!" Arbiter Sands said as he ordered his robots to open fire. Sadly for Sands, he ordered the robots to attack by waving his drinking arm, which just happened to have a scalding hot cup of coffee in it. The resulting spray from the coffee spalshed on two of the robots who immediately stopped, dropped and rolled, then threatened to sue the makers of the coffee for keeping it so hot. This summoned a crowd of robot lawyers who blocked Sands from progressing any further while the robots' claims and witness statements were processed.
"Curse my need for morning wake-up fuel!" Arbiter Sands shouted to an uncaring sky. "I'll get you, Hephaestus 1, if it's the last thing I do!"
Heph still had to worry about the giant electrical demon chasing him, though.
"RUN, COWARD!" Deathsurge crackled with the sound of a thousand exploding electrical transformers.
Heph, not wishing to be zapped into oblivion or be captured by Arachnos, complied.
"Great, not only is he evil, he's a conoisseur of video games," Heph muttered.
"DON'T KNOCK THE CLASSICS," Deathsurge roared.
"Right," Heph said, still running towards the nearest dock. He opened up a communication channel. "Em? Clem? Earl? Who's on?"
"Ready when you are, boss," Agent Munin said.
"Okay. I'm near a ferry boat. Where are you?" Heph asked.
"Apparently we're near a black market plastic surgeon who sells cheap Icon knockoffs," Munin said.
"Is that the Semi trailer?" Heph asked.
"What Semi trailer?" Munin replied.
"Crud. Well, I'll just head south...er... I guess," Heph said, bounding over the trailer surrounded by hot-off-the-back-of-the-truck deals and a crowd of surly-looking villains. Deathsurge leapt over them as well, still following Heph. Thinking quickly, Heph headed for the water, managing to defy physics and all pretenses of surface tension by bouncing off the surface of the water with another mighty leap. Deathsurge was still following him, floating above the water like the malevolent electrical demon he was.
"I'm bringing a friend along!" Heph said.
"A friend?" Earl asked.
"Okay, I'm being followed by Deathsurge who hates me and wants me to die."
"Hmm, yeah, he does that a lot I hear," Clem said.
"Just be ready!" Heph said as he leapt over Cap au Diable's very own sawmill. Deathsurge floated by, shutting the sawmill down by draining its electrical system. The millworkers took this as a sign for a coffee break, much to the relief of the numerous future sawmill victims who'd been tied to the incoming logs.
Heph landed in the middle of a group of Luddites.
"ROBOT! UNCLEAN!" they shouted.
"No, dang it! I'm a CYBORG!" Heph said, stopping to explain the difference. "I started out as a normal human like you guys did, but instead of living the rest of my life as a cripple, my biological bits were replaced or supplemented with robotic equivalents, allowing me to have my life back! I'm not just a machine, I'm also a human being! Get it right!" the big blue cyborg said.
The Luddites statred at him, then one pointed at him.
"CYBORG! UNCLEAN!" the Luddite shouted.
Heph shook his head and leapt for cover as Deathsurge landed on the Luddites.
"Guys?" Heph shouted into his communicator.
"On it, boss," Munin said as she uncloaked next to Heph, arrows at the ready. "Check this out!"
Munin fired a trio of arrows at Deathsurge, each trailing a superfine wire. The arrows passed through harmlessly.
"Okay," Heph said, "Now what?"
Munin smiled under the faceplate of her new battle armor. "Then I do this!" she said as she dropped the wire reels into a nearby shipping canal. Deathsurge howled as he followed the wires into the water and discharged violently, causing water to spray everywhere. Munin and Heph landed at the edge of the canal.
"Deathsurge, you're grounded!" Munin said.
Heph looked over at his teammate. "Oh, that's a good one."
"You liked it?"
"Bad pun, check, bad guy down, check, use of supernatural abilities and basic electrical theory to deat said bad guy, check. It works!"
"Shiny," Munin said with glee.
"Okay, so who's got the getaway vehicle?" Heph said.
"We're uh, still working on that," Clem said through the communicator system. "Might be able to get a boat on short--" --there was a clanging noise and a grunt of pain-- "notice," Clem continued. "Man, I forgot how heavy these pipewrenches are. Took me a while to swing it!"
"Do we have transport out, though?" Heph asked.
"We do now!" Earl said.
Heph and Munin shot into the sky to meet up with the recording crew as the scene faded to commercials.
Back Yard Boom - Emo Catgirl - Cobalt Claymore - Hephaestus 1
Avatar by Scarf_Girl!
((Written with the assistance of Ryan's player. ))
No cars had sped by for a while. I figured there was still a man-hunt going for me, but for now, they were probably focused on Mr. Counsels building. I climbed out of the storm drain with all the documents rolled up and frozen into a log. I couldnt risk dropping something and literally leaving a paper trail.
I walked up to the street, peering above the crest of the bank to make sure the coast was clear. It was. As nonchalantly as I could, I walked up the street toward yet another phone booth. I wish I had just kept the first one Id found. Though probably, if there was a Crey facility nearby, it wouldnt be listed in the local Yellow Pages.
As I neared the phone booth, my mind was running in circles trying to figure out the next step. I couldnt stay on the streets it was Christmas Day. No one was out except me. I might as well have a flashing yellow light on my head. If the phone book didnt help me
Then I wondered why I didnt think of this sooner. Why not just call Mr. Kinsolving? I should have already done it. Reinforcements could already be here. Tami could already have been saved. Im so
Wait
I remember. At the airport, when we thought Tamis bag had been lost and I said we could call the Rock and have them send her some things, Ms. Post had said, No, dont bother calling them while youre visiting down here. You need to get away from them.
But I could call them now. Help would be here
when? Were there any teleportation facilities nearby? A Longbow base? Or did Quantico have a teleporter?
Suddenly all of that flew out of my thoughts as I heard tires squealing! Busted! I hung up the phone, put my hands in the air and turned around slowly to give myself up to
Ginger and Michelle?
Hey! You remember us, Ginger called from the drivers seat. We can do small talk in a minute. Right now, you have to come with us. Tami needs you.
Normally, Im not much of a one for foul language. Thats one of the things I love about Ryan he never curses. I think an intelligent person doesnt really need to. But when Albert and his security goons found me as I was hanging up the phone, Im pretty sure I said the s-word. Like I said, it wasnt something I usually say, but then again, I wasnt feeling particularly intelligent as they put those plastic straps around my wrists.
Albert picked up the phone and hit redial. Oh gosh
they were going to figure out what Id done and
He laughed.
Listen to this, he said and handed the handset to one of his goons.
The goon laughed.
Albert mimicked a teenage girls voice as he said, Hello, my name is Ginger. If this is Matt Damon, give me a sec and Ill answer. Anyone else, leave a message. Then he hung up the phone and said, Cute. The Matt Damon line very clever. Too bad she cant get him to come rescue you, eh?
One of the goons tossed me over his should like I was a big sack of dog food and carried me back to my cell. He dropped me through the door and my head hit first when I landed on the hard floor. My head spun. I saw stars. It stunk in there. No one had cleaned it up.
You will learn to behave, Albert said, Or I will harvest your cells and destroy you as a failed experiment. Is that understood?
All I could do was moan.
Very good, he said, interpreting that as a yes. Now, while you were mucking up your little escape attempt, your friend, Ms. Post returned with a gift.
I looked up and saw Livvy walk up behind him. Only
it wasnt the Livvy I knew it was like a younger version of her. Between her and Albert there was Mitri. He had managed to get caught also.
I think I said the s-word again.
Mitri was nearly crackling with energy. Even with my powers suppressed (It was in my ear! Can you believe it? I later found out the suppression device was in my ear! She had slipped it in there that first night at Mr. Counsels house!) I could feel it. His powers were still working. Why didnt he do something?
Albert was thinking the same thing, because he said, Why didnt you use the neutralizer on him?
It didnt work, Livvy said, But dont worry. I have told him to behave. Hes as docile as a kitten and will be as long as hes around me.
Albert smiled, Very well. It looks like you are going to have a working vacation in Tuscany. Then he pointed toward my cell and said, Put him in here with her until were ready to transport them to our facility in Italy.
Livvy shoved Mitri in and he tripped on my foot. I opened my mouth to scream when I realized he was going to land right on top of me. This was going to be bad.
See, what they didnt know was that since I brought Daddy back to life and turned him into Mitri, we havent been able to touch each other at all. Our energy signatures may match on most levels, since it started out as my energy signature, but and Im lousy with this stuff so Im trying to explain it like he explained it to me, but Im not doing a very good job they also are anti-complimentary in a sub-quantum state. My translation of that we cant come into contact without something either weird or chaotic happening. Exactly what he meant, I had no idea.
But everything went white
((Season 3, Episode 13, Part 4! Sorry for the delay, folks, the inspiration to write got blocked for a bit.))
As the show came back from commercials, the full Serv'd team had reassembled by a sleek black blue-water racing boat. Clem and Earl were using their technical know-how to get everything prepared.
"All that's left is to find the keys on this bad boy and we can get out of here," Earl said.
"You guys haven't hotwired a boat before?" Heph asked.
"You have?" Clem asked.
Heph looked at his recording teammate for a second.
"Okay, stupid question, then," Clem said. "I retract it."
Heph pulled a fiber-optic line from a spool inside his head and shoved it under the ignition panel. "All right, let me see what's what in here and- ah, got it! Standard Mariner Corporation ignition system."
"You know what those look like on the inside?" Munin asked.
"I also have online access to their schematics," Heph said. "If you have a wi-fi signal, you have internet access. Besides, Internet is a buddy of mine."
"Internet?" Munin asked.
"Television's little brother. I help them with ratings and access, they help me with stuff like White Sox telecasts and instant schematics finding," Heph said.
"Who don't you know, Mick?" Munin asked.
"It's part of being a cop. You have to network to get new information sources and to keep all your information channels honest."
"That's taking it to another level," Munin said.
"Not really, they're decent guys more or less. Well, except when Television gets on his-"
The signal garbled for a few seconds.
"But it's no different than anyone else who gets up on his soapbox to rant," Heph finished.
The engine rumbled to life as the boat slipped its moorings and casually sped its way to safety. The scene faded back in to the crew at their office.
"The Grey Geist is currently being in-processed at Traffic Division and we're on our way to the end of another season," Heph said over coffee.
"So how did you get past the school's security?" Munin asked. "Not only that, with all the junior-grade villains in that school, how did you make it out in one piece?"
"Elementary, my dear Munin," Heph said from behind his coffee mug. "I'd like to introduce you all to one of my extra helpers." Heph turned to the office door that linked his private office with the main office. "Mickey! Front and center!"
"Right, cousin," a young red-haired man with a shaggy mohawk, excessive tattooing and a chain-encrusted leather jacket walked out of the office.
"Guys, this is my youngest cousin Mickey. His dad, my Uncle Brian, went off in search of the best drinking and brawling he could find after a few years in the Merchant Marine. Mickey was in the Navy then went off with less drunken brawling and more martial artistry."
"Geez, tell them everything," Mickey said. "Mick called me for help since I was nearby at the time. I figured I could take a few weeks off from fighting crime in Detroit and help my cousin on making an escape."
"You had this planned this far in advance?" Munin asked incredulously.
Heph shook his head. "No, that planning goes to a certain ninja-in-law who shall remain nameless."
"Who, our paperwork ninja?" Clem asked.
The Paperwork Ninja appeared behind Clem. "No. He said 'ninja-in-law' not 'ninja strategic planning and logistics specialist.' There's a difference. For one, ninjas-in-law are usually not completely trained by ninjas, but often by similar methods."
Clem's eyes darted to one side. "So... noted," he gulped.
"They also take our jobs," the Paperwork Ninja grumbled. "Jobs my fellow ninjas and I have worked hard to earn!"
"I didn't take anyone's job," Mickey said. "I just helped out a fellow crimefighter in the family is all."
"One moment you're being planted in a university to help facilitate an escape, the next minute you're skimming the entire clan's library for weaknesses and undercutting our prices! It's always the same thing!"
"Right," Heph said after a few awkward moments. "So, who's up for Mexican for lunch? Anyone?"
The screen faded to credits.
Back Yard Boom - Emo Catgirl - Cobalt Claymore - Hephaestus 1
Avatar by Scarf_Girl!
Everything went white
I was blinded by the sudden release of energy. I couldnt see anything. I couldnt hear anything either. It seemed like the only of my senses that were working were smell, taste, and pain.
I could smell ozone and tasted concrete dust. And pain. I hurt like I hurt the first time I got punched by one of those big Freakshow bruisers really bad and all over my body. My ribs hurt when I inhaled. My shoulder hurt to move it and my right knee was swollen tight inside the leg of my pants. My first thought was that Mitri and I blew up, and that wasnt far from the truth.
I started to stand up but felt something lying on my chest; something small that was moving. A cat? I didnt remember seeing a cat in the building at any time. I felt it smooth and soft as a babys
Then I realized what it was.
Mitri? I said. I couldnt believe it! Mitri!?
Still blind and deaf, I wrapped him (and I was sure it was him) in my arms. This was the kind of chaotic thing he told me might happen if we ever touched. I just hoped he was all right.
I closed my eyes, hoping that might help them recover quicker. I needed to assess the situation quickly before the others had a chance to recover. When I opened them again, I could see but barely! Everything was a blur. No doubt the smoke that the explosion raised wasnt helping much.
With Mitri cradled snuggly, I sat up. As soon as a did, I went back down again. The whole right side of my head was throbbing. I could feel my heartbeat in it. My left earlobe felt wet and when I touched it, I realized why I couldnt hear my eardrum was ruptured. Great.
The good news was that I could feel quantum energy flowing inside me and if enough of it built up soon, I would be able to fix myself and get out of there.
But first, I just had to get out of that cell. My eyesight was much better now and I could see the doorway or where the doorway used to be. Now it was just a jagged hole in the wall with a bunch of rubble half blocking it.
Beneath the rubble was Albert. He was moving, but barely. (And really, I was glad of that because as bad as things were, things would be worse if I was responsible for killing someone even a bad someone.) Some of his goons were with him under the rubble, and they were moving too.
I really needed to get out of there fast before they recovered. I looked down at Mitri. He looked so cute. He was just staring up at me as if he knew exactly what was going on and trusted me completely to keep him safe. And maybe he did.
As fast as I could while still being careful, I climbed over the rubble and the goons and Albert and out into the hallway. It looked like most of the damage was limited to the immediate vicinity. I picked a direction and started limping in as near a run as I could manage.
I talked as I ran, though it sounded muffled and strange to me because of my ear. I wish I had a better memory for stuff like this, I said. Im lousy with directions. I always have to let Jo or Caden or one of the other E-Teens take the lead if were hunting bad guys in caves or the sewers. We ran a bit further and I said, Dont worry, Mitri, big sister will find a way out.
Weird. He was my father, and now hes my brother. Gyah! At that moment I really hated the whole quantum everything. But I didnt say that to the baby. What I said instead was, And if you stay this way, big sister will take care of you.
I was talking more for my own nerves than anything, and to take my attention away from the agony in my knee and head, but Mitri seemed to like the sound of my voice. Now and then Id glance down to see if he was all right and every time he would look at me with those trusting baby eyes. I know its a stupid thing to do, but pretty soon, I was more focused how cute he was and how good he felt in my arms than I was on where I was going. Blame it on the concussion.
A mans big fist shot out from a doorway on the right and connected with my face. I tasted blood in my mouth and my head felt like Id just been through another explosion. I bounced off of the wall, but I didnt drop Mitri, and when we fell, I made sure I held him tight to my chest so he wouldnt get hurt. My own head, however bounced twice when it hit the floor.
Michael Sr. stood over me, his fist ripped open by the teeth he loosened in my jaw.
He mouthed some words at me. Probably loudly, and most of them probably words I wouldnt use on anybody. I still didnt have the strength to repair myself, but I did have enough power built up for one good quantum blast. I shot him right in the face. It had to hurt.
Unfortunately, I couldnt hear him scream because I still couldnt hear anything. Everything was spinning. I wasnt sure I could get back up, but then I looked down at Mitri and he was crying.
I had to get back up. I had to get us out of there.
Its cliché, I know, but with the last ounce of strength I had in me, I stood up. I had to force my legs to move. I had to make the world stop spinning so fast. I took a deep breath and started moving again.
Ahead, I could see sunlight around the corner. That meant a door or a window. That meant a way out. I went that direction and turned. Down at the end of the hallway was a window. The sun was shining in it, and I didnt know if it was a rising sun or a setting sun. But that didnt matter. At least wed see the sun again. Id had my doubts there for a while. I walked toward the window.
Suddenly it shattered. I just stood there a moment trying to figure out why. I mean why would a window just shatter like that? When a chunk of brick flew out of the wall right beside me, I knew why. I turned and there was Mikey, freed from the armor, wearing just his boxers and standing with a plain old military .45 pointed at me. You dont need powers and blast rays when a bullet will do the job just as well.
I turned my back to him and crouched down wrapping myself around Mitri as best as I could. Then I waited to die.
And I waited.
Then I slowly turned around to see the most amazing thing. Ryan was there.
On the season premiere of "Serv'd!":
Heroes and police officers are pitted against each other in a court of law!
"Can you show us on the limited-edition action figure where exactly you were touched?" Chris Jenkins asked the police officer.
"Th-there," the rookie cop said, pointing to a specific spot on the action figure. "I'm so ashamed!"
"THAT'S A LIE!" Swan shouted. "I'd never touch a guy there! Well, not without consent at least!"
Torn between two very different worlds of law enforcement, Heph and Fang must make a decision that could easily destroy their friendship!
"I can't see how you could choose any other way, Mick," Fang said. "We always have to watch out for each other."
"Well, maybe things have changed," Heph said. "I don't know."
This season, be ready for anything! Be ready for "Serv'd!"
"Serv'd!" is still on Friday nights at 10pm Eastern on A&E with an encore presentation on The Hero Channel at 11pm Eastern on Thursday. Check your local listings for channel numbers.
Back Yard Boom - Emo Catgirl - Cobalt Claymore - Hephaestus 1
Avatar by Scarf_Girl!
((I really liked using multiple parts for each episode, so I'm going to switch over to that format from here on out. It'll be easier for me to keep writing.))
The music and credits for "Serv'd!" didn't change much from the previous year, so fans knew pretty much what to expect from the show. The camera faded in to the familiar scene of Hephaestus 1 and Agent Munin in Heph's office, checking the latest set of subpoenas sent to them for service. Munin was obviously not happy.
"I didn't pick the temp, Em. Honest," Heph said.
"I know that. If you'd have picked the temp we might have gotten a competent one to take over for your paperwork ninja while he's on emergency leave," Munin said. "Why did they saddle us with this one?"
"I guess with Papes being gone, we needed someone to balance out his efficiency," Heph said.
"Mister O'Flannagan?" a breathy and ditzy voice said through the intercom. "I can't find the 'Any' key to start my computer."
Heph's head sunk. "They've burdened us with Sandi the Idiot Temp."
"Every time she says her name I can hear the little heart she draws over the i," Munin grumbled.
"She needs to stop that. I mean, she's done that on everything where she's had to sign her name and it's getting kind of tedious."
Munin glared at her boss. "You go tell her then, boss."
"I can't," Heph said.
"Why not?" Munin asked.
"Uhm. I kind of go out there and forget what it is I asked her to do," Heph said with embarrassment.
"Well, look her in the eyes, then!"
"I've tried that already! It didn't help! I think she's got some kind of superpower that makes you forget why you're mad at her," Heph said.
"She's got two of them, actually."
"I was counting them as parts of a set."
Munin took a deep breath and sighed. "Okay, Heph, then I'll do it."
"Thank you!" Heph said. "You may also need to wade through the army of Sandi's would-be suitors in there as well." He went back to cross-checking the stack of papers in order to calculate the route they'd take today.
Munin opened the door. A dozen of the District Court's various clerks and junior lawyers were busy chatting with Sandi, arguing with each other and generally keeping the platinum blonde temp from being able to create a single thought. Well, thinking was tough for her to begin with.
"I'm sorry, guys, but I have to sign all these forms and check email and I'm getting behind because I can't start my computer," Sandi said.
"That's all right, Sandi," a junior lawyer said. "It's not like this is a serious division or anything."
That statement proved to be a mistake as the lawyer found a taser pressed to his neck and fired off. As the lawyer slumped to the floor, the other men stopped to see the ruckus. The ruckus was one short blonde girl with a District Courts Process Server badge hung on a chain around her neck.
"All right, gentlemen, you've gotten your free look at the temp agency's latest offering of pulchritudinous office management," Munin said as she re-holstered the taser. "Sandi," she said with mild shudder, "has work to do. Now get this guy off my boss's floor and get out."
The lawyers and clerks complied with a haste rarely seen in the halls of bureaucracy. Munin turned back to Sandi and pressed one of the keys on Sandi's computer. The screen lit up to the temp's surprise.
"Oh, that would have taken me hours to find!" Sandi said as she leapt up and hugged Munin, nearly suffocating the poor girl. Munin flailed helplessly in an attempt to escape the temp's cleavage.
At this point Heph walked into the reception area of the office. "Em, you said you could handle her superpowers! Anyway, we need to go. Something big is happening at the entrance to the Hollows."
The scene faded out to commercials.
Back Yard Boom - Emo Catgirl - Cobalt Claymore - Hephaestus 1
Avatar by Scarf_Girl!
((Whoops! Thought I posted this a month ago! If anyone is still following this, I apologize! Thanks to Ryan's player for co-writing this section! ))
After I got out of the car and walked closer to the plant, I could see security guards at the corners of the building. There would be more inside, and if they were equipped with something other than those Crey freeze rays things might get tricky.
I couldn't decide how to go about getting rid of those guards without setting the whole complex on me, and I was getting this growing feeling of urgency when I felt the ground shake and all the guards outside ran inside. It was Tamis explosion, but I didnt know that at the time.
So, I just knocked down a section of fence electrified yeah, but ice isn't much of a conductor and let myself in at the door that the guards were good enough to leave open.
I followed the sound of their shoes hitting the floor until I caught up with two guards who were trailing the rest. I stoned up my fist, one-shotted them, and kept going. Everyone must have been pretty distracted, because no one seemed to notice me punching my way up to the front couple of guards. I followed those two until we reached a place where there was a bunch of debris in the floor then I took them out also. I checked out the pile of rubble. There were some people trapped under it, but only some suits and more guards, no Tami. I climbed over them and looked through this big hole in the wall and into what looked like some sort of detention room. It smelled awful in there.
Tami wasn't here and wasn't behind me, and the guards had seemed intent on something up ahead, so I kept going.
The hallway turned right not far past where the explosion happened and after that, it crossed another hallway. I didnt know which way to go. I wasnt even entirely sure Tami was still in the building. For all I knew, she mightve been taken out the front door when I was coming in the back. But then I heard someone talking kinda loud. It sounded like...
Tami!
I took off toward her voice at full speed, and when I heard a man scream, I somehow managed to go faster. It sounded like a fight was going on and as I turned another corner, I could see Michael Sr. lying face up in a doorway with his head sticking outside it. He was unconscious and between his eyes was a scorched spot that was still smoking. I knew I was close. Thats when I heard a gunshot.
I almost tripped over my feet, I was running so hard. Ahead was another intersection where I had to go either left or right. Light was shining in from the left, casting moving shadows on the floor and walls. I ran that way.
There was Tami with her back to me crouched low in front of a shattered window. Between us stood her nephew... half-nephew... whatever... Michael Jr., pointing a gun at her.
I wasn't thinking at all at that point. I just jumped and tackled him around his knees so that his body bent backward and his gun hand pointed up toward the ceiling. He dropped the gun when he hit the floor, and as he reached for it, I stoned up my fist and hit him hard enough that he stopped moving. It was probably more force that necessary, sure, but can you blame me?
Things were quiet after that. Really quiet. Tami hadnt moved and I was starting to worry that I was too late again. Then she turned her head and saw me. I dont think Id ever been so glad to see her smile.
She was holding a baby?
Between the blood on Tamis ear and the look in her eyes I could tell she was in pain, but she was still smiling and when I went to her, she grabbed my shirt and pulled me down to kiss her.
We sat there for a few moments sort of holding onto each other. I had no idea what to do next, and I think I was coming down from the adrenaline high. I didnt know where shed found the baby. I was just happy I had found her.
The sound of footsteps around the corner and the too familiar clicking sound of weapons preparing to fire interrupted our reunion. I stood, iced up, and moved to block Tami. I couldn't do much more than stare when a Marine came around the corner and said, Step away from the girl.
A skinny, red-headed teenage girl in a black bikini sits on a beach towel with a tall, handsome bathing suit-clad young man with dark hair and brown eyes framed by black-rimmed glasses. They are both smiling at you through a video camera
Okay, the girl says, heres what happened. We came down to Virgina for Christmas
She recounts the perilous adventure and winds down to its conclusion.
so as thankful as I was to see the Marines, it was really Ryan who was the hero.
The young man who has sat silent the entire time blushes, rolls his eyes, and shakes his head without saying anything.
The girl continues, And Mr. Counsel didnt die. As soon as he shot himself, it broke Livvys control over him. When he woke up in the hospital, he had the police call Dr. Phodor who called some friends in the government, and they sent the Marines! They showed up right after Ryan found me and cleaned up the place. They arrested Albert, Michael Sr., Michael Jr., some other Crey staffers, and all the security guards. They never found Livvy.
The young man frowns as if to confirm that not finding Olivia Post was indeed a bad thing.
So much time had passed by the time Ryan found me that it was too late for me to heal myself thats just the way my powers work and I was in kinda bad shape. Dr. Phodor decided Mitri and I were to be taken to a special facility on some private island in the Caribbean because they had equipment there that would have me fixed up in no time, and also to make sure we wouldnt blow up again. Because I started crying and begging and he wouldnt let go of my hand anyway they let Ryan come too. And thats how we spent our Christmas. And our New Years. And they say maybe our Valentines Day. Here on this island!
The girl sticks out a skinny leg and her foot goes out of the frame. The camera angle moves up and a patch of palm trees and sea oats stands against a clear blue sky that almost blends with the ocean beneath it. Behind the palms is a small, cozy bungalow.
From off-camera, the girls voice says, Dont worry, everybody we have chaperones, and the angle changes again. Now, past a thicker palm grove a large white building can be seen, and closer, much closer to where the happy couple sits, is a female Marine in full combat gear.
Both young voices ring out at once, See you soon!
This is followed by the sound happy giggling. Something bumps the camera and it tips over, pointing out toward calm blue waters.
(Part 2 of the season 4 season premiere!)
The scene faded back in from the commercial break, finding the intrepid duo at the high-security gate between Atlas Park and the former Eastgate nighborhood. A dozen police officers formed a picket line, their protest signs taped to their riot batons.
"SWAN GUILTY OF UNREASONABLE SEARCH AND SEIZURE" was printed on the first sign. "CAN'T YOU JUST SHAKE OUR HANDS?" was written on the next. Each sign was a variation on a plea to the local heroes to stop groping the guards at each security gate.
Heph and Munin walked up to the picket line. "What's going on here, my fellow coppers?" Heph asked.
"Like you don't know, Heph," the first officer said. "For years we've endured the silent shame of getting groped every time one of your so-called hero pals passes through the security gates. For years we've endured the catcalls, the little 'honk honk' noises, even the 'Hey! Cup check!' jokes. The Police Benevolent & Protective Organization of Paragon City isn't standing for it any longer! We've suffered budget and pay cuts, but being told 'just get over it' and 'they're harmless jokes' is just too much. We want justice!"
"Justice... for having women grab your man-bits for good luck as they go headlong into dangerous parts of the city?"
"You know, Mick, I'm now very happy that I use the base teleporters instead of the security gates," Munin said to her big blue teammate.
"There's a lot of new heroes who don't understand that 'NO' means 'NO.' That's why we're picketing all the security gates. And no one ever tells them to show us at least a little professional courtesy and respect our personal space," the first officer said.
"Swan's the worst, though!" a second officer said. "At least Valkyrie and Mynx look embarrassed and mutter something about 'it's only for good luck, honest' or 'it's a stupid tradition' when they go through."
"Yeah!" the first officer said. "Swan's all 'ooh you're a big fella, oh wait that's your flashlight' and 'Wanna extend your baton for me later?" Then she encourages the other heroes to grab us!"
"So, Swan is sexually harrassing you guys and fostering an environment where others are encouraged to do the same?" Munin asked.
"Yes!" the second officer said. "You want to know why? Patrolman Rivers over there got groped a little too enthusiastically by that new hero with the chemically-enhanced superstrength. He was out on disability for six months due to nerve and muscle damage!"
Heph nodded. "Well, that explains why you and I were sent to deliver the license revocation papers to Anabolicus, Em."
"I guess I owe you five bucks. I could've sworn it was for crminial misuse of a toga, Mick," Munin said. "And who would use 'Anabolicus' as a hero name anyway?"
"You run out of good names, you wind up picking the bad ones," Heph said. He turned to the officers. "So is this an informational picket?"
"No, we're blocking gate access. If people want into the Hollows, they'll have to find friends who can teleport them there!" the first officer said.
"Isn't striking like this illegal?" Heph asked.
"We're off-duty," the first officer said. "You go do your job for your shift, then right afterwards you go to the picket line and take over for the previous guys. Our next shift is showing up right now, in fact."
Heph turned and looked at the group of uniformed officers.
"Ah, crap," Heph muttered.
There was Fang, the Littlest Werewolf, leading a group of officers in his patrol gear.
"Ah, crap," Fang muttered as he saw Heph. "I didn't think you were going to be here, Mick."
"Well, the district courts sent us to see what was going on because of a request from the chief of police."
"Then you're supporting us, right?" Fang asked. "Tell the other heroes to stop groping our fellow officers. That's why I'm standing with the cops on this one. What about you, Mick?"
Heph shrugged. "Emmy and I got asked to investigate this, so maybe there's another reason. I can't make a choice now since I don't know the full story."
"I can't see how you could choose any other way, Mick," Fang said. "We always have to watch out for each other."
"Well, maybe things have changed," Heph said. "I don't know."
"Just give us a chance, Fang," Munin said. "We'll get this sorted out."
"Yeah, Manticore said that, too. He promised Back Alley Brawler and Blue Steel that he'd get it all sorted out and what happened? Swan got more blatant about it."
Munin's eyebrow raised up over her glasses, clearly showing she'd been around her boss for way too long. "Sounds like we're on our way to Brickstown, then, boss."
Heph nodded. "Fang, we'll get this situation resolved, okay? Just tell your guys to stay calm and not make a bad situation worse."
"We're right, Mick," Fang said. "So what's to investigate?"
"Keep up that attitude and you'll never be a detective like me or your uncle Larry," Heph said. "There's always something to investigate."
The scene faded to the next commercial break.
Back Yard Boom - Emo Catgirl - Cobalt Claymore - Hephaestus 1
Avatar by Scarf_Girl!
((A "Serv'd!" Commercial Break.))
A lizardman in a bad toupee walks in front of a camera.
"Can a fifteen-second call to GECKO Insurance save you five hundred dollars?"
He pauses and looks at the camera dramatically.
"Does Hephaestus 1 make a really bad choice for a Smartcar rally driver?"
The scene shifts to a shot of Hephaestus 1 dressed in racing coveralls and looking at a Smartcar as a gaggle of the little electric vehicles scoot along a track.
"Seriously? This thing's actual size? Seriously?"
The screen fades to black and an announcer gives a simple voice over.
"GECKO Insurance. The Answer is 'Yes, obviously.'"
Back Yard Boom - Emo Catgirl - Cobalt Claymore - Hephaestus 1
Avatar by Scarf_Girl!
((Season Premiere, part 3!))
Hephaetsus 1 and Agent Munin arrived in the northwest corner of Brickstown as Swan was just about to leave her job of signing off on new security levels for heroes. Two groups of Fifth Column and Council goons were playing stickball when one of the Fifth Column troops forgot the infield fly rule, causing a massive gunfight. Heph and Munin managed to catch Swan while she was still dazzled by the gunfire.
"Hey, Swan, how's things?" Heph asked.
"Oh. You guys," Swan said. "Well, things aren't good if you're here."
"Chill a little, Swan, we're here investigating, not handing out summons," Munin said. "I'm sure you've heard your name mentioned lately at various picket lines in the city, right?"
"I don't know why they're so angry. It's just a little joke is all!" Swan said dismissively. "Come on, they're cops! They get paid to be abused by the city!"
Heph's Eyebrow of Disbelief raised slowly, then lowered. "Excuse me?"
"They get paid by the city to deal with all the stuff we heroes don't want to deal with, and they just give us all this attitude. They're all 'We went to the Academy, we're better than heroes.' Please!" Swan said. "I figure that if you're taking the taxpayer's dime, you deserve to get harassed."
"Oh? Hey, is that your car getting its tires stolen over there, Swan?" Munin said as she pointed to a late-model sedan currently being put up on blocks.
"What? Gah! No! Where are the police? MY RIGHTS HAVE BEEN VIOLATED! I DEMAND JUSTICE!" Swan shouted.
"But you're a hero, Swan, can't you take care of it?" Heph asked.
"No, car thieves are a cop's job, and like normal, they're never around!" the amazonian heroine said.
"Maybe if you were a little less of a jerk they'd be here," Munin muttered.
Swan just shot Munin a look of death. "I'm not a jerk."
"Uh, yeah, you're being one right now," Heph said. "Complaining about cops' salaries, then crying when one's not around because you're too good to fight crime? Total jerk move there."
"Well, I'm gonna have someone's head on a platter for this!" Swan said as she stomped off to the tram.
"Was it me or did she make no sense whatsoever?" Heph asked his partner.
"I think she's got her spandex on too tight," Munin said. "She's really ticked off about something, but I don't think it's completely related to being the target of the Police Benevolent's strike."
"Not completely related?" Heph asked.
"Yeah, it's a hunch."
Heph nodded. "Well, there's someone we can check with."
"Manticore?"
"Yep."
The team of process servers walked up the steps to Manticore's usual hangout. He was speaking to the Cobalt Claymore about things that grim vigilantes of the shadows should normally share with each other.
"Grim grim grim dark grim," Manticore growled.
"Dark grim dark dark darkity grim," the Cobalt Claymore muttered in reply.
"Grim dark! Grim dark grimmy grim grim!" Manticore whispered emphatically.
"Hmm. Grim grim," the blue-cloaked swordsman said. "Catch you later, Manticore. Hey, are you and Sister Psyche still up for the Cubs-Mets game at Citi Field? It's not Wrigley, but baseball is baseball."
"Yeah, we'll be there. Funny how you have to be married these days to go on a double date, huh?"
"Eh, someone's got to keep up the tradition," the Cobalt Claymore said with a shrug. "And remember, 'grim grim, grim darkity grim.'"
Manticore laughed. "CC, that still gets me every time I hear it."
The Cobalt Claymore waved at Heph and Munin and then disappeared into the shadows.
"Hey, Manti," Heph said. "What's the good word?"
"Just finishing up the day's duty rosters. How about you?" Manticore replied.
"So, what's with the whole grimmity-dark talk there?" the big blue cyborg asked.
"Oh. Vigilante-Speak. It's what we use to talk about sensitive subjects in public. We use it when there's ears that shouldn't hear certain things."
"Oh? Like what?" Munin asked.
"Eh, you know. Sensitive stuff," Manticore said with a shrug.
"Like security codes and stuff?" Munin asked again.
"No, just stuff that other, taller, long-legged feather-wearing heroes who get all passive-aggressive when hearing talk about married couples shouldn't hear."
"Ah, got it," Munin said. She paused as realization of the subject set in. "Oh, now I get it!"
Heph nodded. "Yeah, that could be a big part of it. Thanks for the info, Manticore. We may be back if we have more questions."
"That'll be fine," Manticore said.
"And remember, 'grim grim, grim darkity grim!'" Heph said.
Shortly thereafter, Heph and Munin were being chased down the steps by a short, angry hero in red whose words were being bleeped out by the censors.
"He laughed when CC said it!" Heph said as the team got into the SUV and sped off.
"Maybe your timing is off!" Munin said.
"I don't even know what I said," Heph said as he merged into traffic. "Anyway, we'll need to go back to the office and sort a few more things out."
The scene faded to commercials.
Back Yard Boom - Emo Catgirl - Cobalt Claymore - Hephaestus 1
Avatar by Scarf_Girl!
Hephaestus 1 sat at his desk, typing out his latest twice-weekly column when the advertising director for "Serv'd!" walked into the room. As usual, Kerry walked in unannounced.
"Mick, have you seen the latest numbers?" Kerry asked.
"Yeah, Kerr, they're as good as last week's," Heph said.
"They're the same as last week's, Mick. The numbers have stayed steady since you started the show."
Heph nodded, still fixed on the computer monitor in front of him. "Well, I've got a dedicated audience."
"The dedicated audience isn't buying as much as they used to, and some of our sponsors are getting antsy about flat sales."
"It's a bad economy all around."
"They're looking at dropping sponsorship of the show if they don't see improved sales."
Heph shrugged. "Then we get new sponsors, because anyone with any business sense knows that the last thing you do is cut advertising budgets."
"No, they're just going to redirect their advertising money to other shows like 'The Lives of Rich Spoiled Children' and 'Shallow People On a Beach.'"
"If they want to be associated with lousy reality shows, let 'em."
"Those lousy reality shows have increasing audiences."
"I blame the public school system," Heph said with a sarcastic tone. "But then, you can't teach good taste."
"This is serious, Mick. We're going to lose half of our revenue if we don't increase our ratings," Kerry said.
"Half?" Heph said as his Eyebrow of Disbelief raised.
"At least."
"How do we increase ratings?"
"You won't like what we'll have to do."
"Oh no, no nudity. No nudity, no swearing, no sexual innuendo except for comedic purposes, those are the rules because I'm at least trying to make it more family-friendly than at least seventy-five percent of everything else out there!"
Kerry shuddered. "No. We need to hire writers."
"It's not a reality show if you hire writers to plot things out, Kerry," Heph said.
Kerry dropped a flash drive on Heph's desk. "Here are some profiles to go over. There's a bunch of writers who have reality television experience. We need to hire them."
"I am not hiring writers. I don't want my show to turn into a bunch of contrived crap. I'm not an actor."
Kerry shook his head. "We're losing out to stupid cable reality shows with writers and you're not going to change plans?"
"Kerry, tell me: what's the longest-running reality show currently on tv?"
"'The Real World?'" Kerry asked.
"Wrong. It's 'Cops.' It's been on for over 20 years, about as long as 'The Simpsons.' You want a proven formula? There you go. They maintain their advertising, their ratings, and their revenue," Heph said as he turned his chair to face Kerry. "That's the formula I'm going to emulate, all right?"
"We're going to lose our sponsors," Kerry said.
"You're in advertising. Make this loss into a win. Tell people we're making room for new sponsors," Heph said as he plugged the flash drive into his computer. "One other thing, Kerry: are you trying to find a job for someone you know, someone who just coincidentally happens to be a writer for a reality show that's going belly-up?"
"No, I'm not."
"If I find out otherwise, Kerr, your job will be terminated and I'll be advertising for a new advertising guru," Heph said. "Don't lie to me."
"I'm not lying, Mick. I only know of these people through mutual acquaintances in the business."
"Will a check with social and business networking sites prove that?"
"Yes."
"You're sure?" Heph asked.
"One hundred percent positive," Kerry said.
"All right then. Once I've finished checking online, then I'll start looking at the profiles."
"I just said you don't need to check, Mick," Kerry said.
"Oh, I trust you," Heph said, "but I also like to verify that my trust is well-placed."
Kerry stood there while Heph checked the first writer.
"This is going to take a while, Kerr. Have a seat."
Back Yard Boom - Emo Catgirl - Cobalt Claymore - Hephaestus 1
Avatar by Scarf_Girl!
(Season 4 Premiere Conclusion, yay!)
Once Heph and Munin arrived at the office, Sandi the Idiot Temp waved them over to her desk.
"Uh, Mr. One," the secretary said to Heph, "Your box of dollies that you ordered is here."
Munin nearly snorted coffee out through her nose.
Heph sighed. "They're not dolls. They're limited-edition action figures."
"But they're so huggable!" Sandi said.
"Just give me the box," Heph grumbled.
Sandi handed over the box to Heph. He reached into it and pulled out a still-packaged Zeus Titan in highly-detailed miniature format. "How the heck is this huggable, Sandi?"
"It's got sad eyes like a lonely puppy!"
"It's got quadruple missile arrays, energy cannons and two biopods running it as an engine of destruction," Heph said.
"No, right there!" Sandi said as she pointed to the nicely-painted figure's main visual sensors. "It looks so sad," she whimpered as she took the toy Titan and hugged it to her suffocation-inducing chest.
"Now, Sandi," Munin said with a grin, "Give Heph his dolly back."
"No," Sandi said. "Not until he calls it Captain Sparkles and gives it a kiss."
Heph's Eyebrow of Disbelief was making thumping noises as it tried to break past its physical stops. "Give me my action figure back. I need it for an upcoming court case."
Sandy pouted. "Not until you apologize to Captain Sparkles."
Heph shrugged. "Fine," he said, stepping forward. There was a noise like a cough as Sandi found a tranquilizer dart embedded in her neck.
"That's not my normal accessor-" the temp said as she lapsed into unconsciousness. Heph grabbed the action figure from Sandi before she hit the floor.
Munin looked at her boss. "When did you get that added?"
"A long time ago," Heph said as he set the dart launcher in his arm to recharge its compressed nitrogen cylinder. I normally don't use it, but... oh, who am I kidding? We need our Paperwork Ninja back. This lady is driving me crazy."
"It's okay, Heph, you can just have a tea party with Captain Sparkles and the rest of your dollies and relax," Munin said with a laugh.
"You're so not helping," Heph said. "Anyway, this Zeus Titan is for the upcoming property-line case we've got over in Hutchinson Park. What we need for the Swan case, though is this." Heph dug further into the box and pulled out an action figure package marked "PPD Special Services Officer."
"They make action figures of the guys who guard the war wall gates?" Munin asked.
"Well, yeah. There's an entire series of police action figures from around the country. It's a collector thing, but I got these for scale dioramas needed at the trials. Well, for the most part," Heph said as he also dug out the latest variant of Hephaestus 1 figures.
"Are those Raiderhosen?" Munin asked.
"Yep!" Heph said. "It'll go right next to the others in my cubicle."
"Wait, aren't those from Japan?"
"One is. Then there's the Talking Heph prototype that I nixed because they wanted to use Bill Cosby's voice and not mine, the first release Heph from the US manufacturer, the second series 'Upgrade' version when I got my arms streamlined, and now there's the Hephtoberfest variant in its signature Raiderhosen."
Munin shook her head. "Boss, you are a serious geek."
"A geek with disposable income, a hot contractually-obligated girlfriend and lasers that go 'PYEWPYEWPYEW' when need be," Heph said.
"And a permanent legal services retainer, don't forget that, Heph," Chris Jenkins said as he walked in.
"Hey, Chris," Heph waved. "Your action figures came in."
Chris hurried over and grabbed two more pacakges from the box. "Yes! I finally got my hands on the new Johnnie Cochran and Alan Dershowitz 'Legal Legends' set!"
"You're going to have them arm-wrestling William Rehnquist and Warren Burger on your credenza, aren't you?" Heph asked.
Munin nearly snorted coffee through her nose again.
"Maybe," Chris said. "More importantly, though, we've finally gotten the court date for dealing with Swan's lecherous habits once and for all."
"Did you get the releases for filming?" Heph asked.
"I got enough of them, yeah," Chris said nonchalantly.
"Did you now?" Munin asked.
"More or less," the lawyer said.
Munin sat down at her desk. "We'll find out soon enough, I'm sure."
"You will. I may need to call you as character witnesses, so be ready," Chris said. "Sorry, but you guys can't stay neutral in this case."
"We may be hostile, so you know," Heph said. "I can vouch for both sides and against both sides. I know cops and heroes pretty well."
Chris Jenkins nodded. "So noted. Say, can you see when they're gonna produce the Oliver Wendell Holmes figure?"
The scene faded out and then back as Heph and Munin sat in the courtroom next to Chris Jenkins and Fang. Fang sat there in his dress uniform and the other two heroes also dressed appropriately as usual. A small wooden box sat next to Chris' legal briefs. As the trial passed, Chris was finally able to call upon one of the victims of Swan's alleged sexual harrassment. The PPD officer was sworn in and Chris walked up to the witness stand holding the small wooden box.
"Officer Streibling, I know you've had a difficult time, but can you tell us what happened? Take your time."
"I was on War Wall Entry Point duty on the day in question when Swan led in a team of new heroes to show them where to go to enter the Hollows," the officer said. "She calmly walked over and eyed me up and down, like she was inspecting me. She then greeted me and said--" the officer stopped, choking a little.
"It's okay. Go on," Chris prodded.
"She said 'Well, aren't you a healthy fellow?' and then she touched me inappropriately."
Chris Jenkins turned to the jury. "Ladies and gentlemen, Oficer Striebling is one of many officers who have suffered this way. But we need to go further, unfortunately." He opened the box to reveal the limited-edition PPD Special Services Officer action figure and set it on a base. The officer paled a little.
"I know it's embarrassing, Officer Striebling, but this is going to help with your case," Chris said gently. "But we need to give a visual representation. Is that okay?"
The police officer nodded.
"Can you show us on the limited-edition action figure where exactly you were touched?" Chris Jenkins asked the police officer.
"Th-there," the rookie cop said, pointing to a specific spot on the action figure. "I'm so ashamed!"
There was a gasp from the jury and the officer stifled a few sobs.
Swan's attorneys had to hold her back as she attempted to leap from her chair.
"THAT'S A LIE!" Swan shouted. "I'd never touch a guy there! Well, not without consent at least!"
The entire court murmered as the judge gaveled the chamber back into silence.
"That's enough outbursts from the defendant," the judge said.
Chris Jenkins returned the figure to its case and looked back to the police officer. "You've done a good thing here, Officer. Do you know of other officers who have suffered this as well?"
The officer nodded. "Yes. They'll be testifying, too."
Chris smiled and looked to the judge. "I'm done, your honor."
The judge nodded. "Does the defense wish to cross-examine the witness?"
The defense attorney rubbed his temples. "No thank you, your honor."
"The witness may step down," the judge said.
"For my next witness, I call Officer Arnold Lubawicz," Chris Jenkins said.
Fang stood up and walked to the witness stand as the cameras faded out.
When the cameras faded in, the jury was about to read their verdict.
"The jury finds the heroine Swan guilty on all 250 counts of Sexual Harrassment and Creation of A Hostile Work Environment," the foreman said as the audience in the chamber murmured about the decision.
Swan threw her hands in the air. "Where am I going to get that kind of money?" she cried out.
"Someone's going to be working a lot of part-time jobs," Heph whispered to Munin.
Munin nodded. "Think she's gonna pay it back in singles?"
Heph paused in the middle of sipping his coffee. "I'm glad I can't snort coffee out of my nose."
Chris Jenkins leaned back in his chair. "Score one more win for Chris Jenkins, attorney at law! Someone has to show that heroes have a darker side, especially when all that money is on the line!"
Heph looked at the lawyer with a cold stare.
"Okay, some heroes. Heroes who aren't going to kill me with lasers if I don't shut my mouth."
The scene faded to credits.
Back Yard Boom - Emo Catgirl - Cobalt Claymore - Hephaestus 1
Avatar by Scarf_Girl!
((This part was largely written by Ryan's player.))
Tami freaked out. Ms. Post did too. I couldn't blame them.
Oh, God, Greg Why? Why?! Ms. Post kept saying that over and over. Tami hugged her and took her out of the room while I called 9-1-1 on the landline beside Mr. Counsels chair.
Id like to report a shooting. I didnt know how else to phrase it. I wasn't quite thinking straight myself.
A shooting. How seriously is the victim injured? As the emergency operator said that, I could hear keys clicking and the sound of a police car responding to the dispatch.
Hes dead. It wasn't the first time I'd made a 9-1-1 call, but that didn't make it much easier. I kept getting that nagging feeling that I was missing something, but I wasn't sure what. It probably wasn't important anyway, and I needed to focus. I got my thoughts together enough to tell them about how wed found Mr. Counsel and who we all were.
The emergency operator asked me to verify the address after he pulled it up in the 9-1-1 system, but I wasn't much help with that. I knew the street, but I'd only been there a couple days and Ms. Post wasn't around to ask for the house number. It sounded right though. After that it was just waiting while the operator kept me on the line until I saw through the window that the police had pulled up in front of the house. The whole process took between five and ten minutes, start to finish.
An officer knocked on the door the way the house was built, I could see this through the window too and I waited for Ms. Post or Tami to open it. Neither of them did. They probably figured I'd get it.
I thanked the emergency operator and hung up the phone to go open the door, but before I was halfway to it, it came crashing in. Four policemen entered the house with their guns drawn. When they saw me, all their weapons pointed my direction.
Get down on the floor!
I did. No reason to slow down the process or encourage them to shoot me. At the same time I tried to explain what had happened and where Mr. Counsel was.
Put your hands behind your back!
I did, still trying to explain and wondering what had happened to Tami and Ms. Post. They had to have heard the shouting, but there wasn't any sign of them.
One of the policemen patted me down, confiscated my pocket knife, and cuffed me. This sure wasn't Paragon. They didn't even seem to consider whether cuffs would hold me or if I had any natural weapons. There must not be many powered people in Richmond.
The officer who seemed to be in charge stayed with me while the other three made their way through the house.
One of them shouted from the den. Found the victim!
Anyone else in the house? the policeman guarding me asked.
Yes. My girlfriend and Mr. Counsels girlfriend. More bad phrasing, I know.
You and Mr. Counsel were dating the same lady?
I could tell he was fishing for a motive. I knew it looked odd, and my attempts at explaining things weren't helping, so I wasn't surprised.
Uh, no. My girlfriend is Tamara Martinov. Mr. Counsel is...was her lawyer. And his girlfriend was Olivia Post. She lives here too. Great. It even sounded suspicious to me.
The other policemen quickly made their way back to where I was lying on the floor.
No one else in the house.
What?
He said there were two women.
The place is clean.
Okay, the officer in charge said, Let in the paramedics and then check outside check the neighbors. See if you can find these women.
Two of the officers left.
I decided to help my case and shut up. I was still getting that feeling that something else was wrong, but with everything going on I couldn't place it.
It only took them a few moments to check outside and go to the neighbors. They came in as the paramedics passed by with Mr. Counsel strapped to a gurney. He had an oxygen mask on his face. And that was it. I'd spent maybe ten minutes in a room with him and hadn't even checked for a pulse. At the time I knew he was dead, but...that didn't make any sense.
No one outside, the policemen reported, and the neighbors dont know any Olivia Post.
Great. There was no Olivia Post. And now a lady who didn't exist had disappeared with Tami.
The officer in charge began chanting to me, You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say