airhead

6 posts a day. Every day. Since 2005.

That is a kitty with some serious claws.

There's some great Soviets in this thread! My uncoloured sketch looks quite plain by comparison. This is The Baku-fu, although he's really from Belarus. His real name is Sergius. He now lives Moscow, still working as a freelance assassin. He uses a crossbow, speargun or harpoon, as well as a tanto or other mid-sized blade. He is morbidly afraid of being recognized, and will hunt down anyone who sees his face at the scene of one of his crimes.



Colour scheme is sea-grey-green and rust-red with silver-grey fur trim and brown hair. Despite his middle-age spread he is surprisingly lithe. He does assassinations because his wife demands a certain standard of living, and Sergius has no other saleable skills.

Gaaahh... awe overload. Envy shock. Felicitation spam. I... have forgotten all the comments I would have made.

That's two of my favoritestest Fenians right there. The Bindweeds are fantastic. And the Nema-Eddy is just not fair. Congratulations!

CR's idea has potential. If you did go that way, perhaps put other objects on the wall (eg. claws not in use, or perhaps those tech-stalactites on the side) in the same colour to signify "stuff that isn't part of his uniform". Again, just disposable ideas.

Hi there GangstaBlade,

Many of the posters on this forum are particularly interested in the story within an arc. So saying more about the story would be good here. It doesn't really take any effort to look up at the Arc Description inside the game, but by the time the game launches they might not even remember the arc ID any more. So catch them with something catchy while they're still on this forum. Even an Arc Title would be good! But your details of the battle above gave me hope that you have paid attention to balance, despite the arc stating "EBs, AVs and custom enemies".

To Ruin no more, by @Dark Droid

"Apparently, there is a group of foes that focus on only ruining lives of innocent citizens. Heroes, we need to stop them. The citizens of Paragon City should be able to walk home alone at night without the thought that some fiend will take them away!"

(Beware of typos at this stage, I did corrections. A player might extrapolate typos to sloppy writing)

The story doesn't say any more than the average street encounter, but the title has me intrigued. Combining "Ruin" with citizens being taken away, it sounds perhaps like a Circle of Thorns story. But the primary villains for the four arcs are Custom.

The contact looks pretty cool. Detective Incharge. If you put a description of him in the "Contact Description" part of Story Settings, I'll be able to see that when I "Ask about contact".

Mission introduction - bad guys are described. Nothing specific about the bad guys. But they're definitely bad. Although I don't understand "they have people who will make you amputate." Perhaps they have people who will amputate my limbs? Why would they do that? Do we have any clue about these people at all? Strengths, weaknesses, motivations?

Send-off says "the target is a base-wipe" - presumably that doesn't involve toilet paper. It makes it sound like a kill-all. People don't like kill-all missions, because it is so easy to overlook just one well-hidden bad guy. But I like the way it's assumed that my victims will wake up in jail. Okay, so my nav tells me I only have to clear the last room. That's not how I'd describe a "base-wipe". I should have spotted the Defeat All element when I chose the arc.

OH! The mission has a time limit. You might like to save those for special occasions. You haven't given me any warning about the time limit in the mission introduction. I might have started the mission knowing that dinnertime would mean I have to pause halfway.

There's lots of custom critters. I really like the designs, the whipping one, the dual pistols one, the one with an axe. Very creative. It looks like a posse of supervillains. Unfortunately, the game mechanics will create duplicates when used as a group, so I have to wonder why there's duplicate villains. Perhaps there's a storyline explanation.

Sara has <br> break-strings in her dialogue. You can't do that in speech, they appear as "<br>".

Boss in first mission has multiple ambushes attached. I give up.

I guess this is a challenge mission. I brought the wrong hero for that, this one likes stories. I didn't get any sense of the story, so I gave up early. Perhaps you can do more to get a player hooked on the plot before you blow them away And play it through with various different heroes (tanks, blasters, controllers, more) to see how it plays.

This is a pretty incredible piece. And just 'on the fly'... my goodness. Pious, keep prayin', it's workin'.

Thanks Bubbawheat and Gypsy Rose! I haven't had much time for this forum, but I still managed a couple of hours after midnight on several nights to get Outbroken to what I wanted it to be. Hopefully your appreciation will be infectious .

Oh - and thanks Gypsy Rose for promoting it even further! That was very kind.

Hey there!

This was great for a first story. There's a definite focus on story telling. Villain stories are inherently hard to write, whem even the old Mills and Boon love story crutch can too easily becomes too tainted to for the player to care. Why should a villain 'care'?

On the other hand, you've written quite a good story of villainous, senseless slaughter that escalates into something more important. Unfortunately I didn't get to the end, once the incessant ambushes beat up my ally, I was toast in the last mission. So I only got a sense of the climax, but did not see it. In the end, I did not feel proud of my villainy. I think the finale might be crucial to that.

I've PM'ed you a pile of notes about little things too, hopefully some of them are useful.

Cheers, airhead

I'm liking it so far too. I don't think the cables could support Alpha without looking like part of a Newton's cradle. Perhaps chains could go straight down behind his head, or struts under his arms (like a forklift behind him). Neither idea is probably worth it at this stage, carry on fine tuning

The one from Blewh is awesome. I like the hood-like helm, interesting twist on the hood-and-helm. Like a black flame, it is creepy in a good way.

The Juggertha and Speedy one is cool too. Oh noes, not Electro! (presumably it was't the lightning what got 'im)

Many people think the Daleks started fully-formed, created from the imagination of Davros.

Few realise the Daleks evolved from the little Daleklets that were the hood ornaments on hydrogen zeppelins. If you think Daleks are scary, wait til fluffy dice evolve.

I had to give these options a go, and see how the Luminescent skin would affect the lurid heroine, "Bang Galore". But it was overkill, so I took it out. On the other hand the wings are probably a keeper.

I know an old lady that swallowed a snake.
What would it take, to swallow a snake?

She swallowed the snake to catch the spider
That wriggled and jiggled and ticked inside'er.

That should be a shoe-in for best castle! I hope the Spouse Component™ emptied the construction elements before the Filial Device™ taped them up. Great job though, it looks indesctructible.

I know almost nothing about tattoos, so I can't offer advice. But I've never seen that yellow and orange reproduced in a tattoo. That should be pretty awesome if it's not toxic! It's a gorgeous fish.

Regardless of how good it will be to lose the Mr Hankey jokes

Thanks Amy Jade. The "who is copying who" is something I discussed with the artist, it is great to hear it was relevant. The logical answer would be that jellyfish can't see, but in a world with super powers, who knows what might be the truth? Edit: On and the water - I'd imagined it greenish-brown, like the hull of a City of Heroes cargo ship, but the ultraviolet light (looks purplish-blue on my screen) is a good idea. Very dance club.

It's taken a lot of commissions to find out what needs to be specified with Airhead's design (and even then stuff gets ignored sometimes, or I forget to mention something). Hopefully this diagram will keep his look consistent in future commissions, while still allowing for individual styles and embellishments.



I am pursuing a model sheet / turnaround so you'll get to see what his butt looks like eventually, but for now you're safe.

Not Jack, he's more pink. Looks like my minimal is an epic fail. It's the big ol' Dark Astoria giant monster.

Ooh I like the St. Martial one, I missed that before. Been watching this thread with much fascination.