City of Heroes: Live Forum Archive

I am going into politics.

Acemace

By Acemace,
Posted on: 2010-09-18 07:15 in Champion

 

Posted

That's right.

This is my official candidacy notice for Evil Vizier of the Champion server.

My strengths include cackling, plotting and dastardly tricks.

In 2011 I promise to increase princess-related schemes by 250% and to reduce hero getaways from nefarious traps by half.

I need your vote so that I may turn on you to further my own goals once in power, so vote Silas for EVIL VIZIER OF CHAMPION!

Cast your meaningless ballots now, plebians. I shall declare myself official Evil Vizier regardless one week from now.

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Posted

I have a few important questions for you, sir.

Who will be your snivelling, stupidly loyal to the death sidekick?

Will he/she be physically deformed, mentally unstable, or both?

Will these princess-related activities be geared towards death or marriage (If an evil necromancer as well, please check both boxes)

Do you, or do you not monologue?

What's your position on minions? Reward excellent service with one or more princess related activities, or grind under your bootheel regardless of results just to remind them who wears the robes in this joint?

Marut, 50 FF/Rad/Power Defender - Champion
Leader of The Earthguard
Leader of The Galactic Empire

 

Posted

*bum rushes the stage with a camera and a microphone* Sir, I've heard that you're ATist? Is this true?

I'll always be a "Champion" at heart. My server away from home.

"When the people fear their government, there is tyranny; when the government fears the people, there is liberty." - Thomas Jefferson

"With great moustache comes great responsibility" - Zee Captain

 

Posted

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marut View Post
I have a few important questions for you, sir.

Who will be your snivelling, stupidly loyal to the death sidekick?
This is an excellent question. I am currently taking applications for my snivelling sidekick. Unflinching, unrewarded loyalty is a must, satisfying whelp when kicked is a plus.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marut View Post
Will he/she be physically deformed, mentally unstable, or both?
Ideally both. I am, however, a generous and am open to causing a candidate GBH if they are too pretty.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marut View Post
Will these princess-related activities be geared towards death or marriage (If an evil necromancer as well, please check both boxes)
Both of these and more. I am a firm believer in green hat thinking skullduggery.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marut View Post
Do you, or do you not monologue?
The question, dearest Marut, is if I could ever be prevented from monologuing.

SPOILER ALERT: haha, no

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marut View Post
What's your position on minions? Reward excellent service with one or more princess related activities, or grind under your bootheel regardless of results just to remind them who wears the robes in this joint?
The latter. Before I clarify my position however, I should like to point out that I do not wear boots, instead footwear of the finest silk. Boots are what the minions wear.

I am of the opinion that minions, underlings and henchmen need brutal sovereignty in their lives. It provides them with structure and purpose. Who am I to take that from them?


Quote:
Originally Posted by Horusaurus View Post
*bum rushes the stage with a camera and a microphone* Sir, I've heard that you're ATist? Is this true?
I deny the allegations and defy the alligators. Crocodiles have always been firm supporters of my political career and I shall support them in kind.

I am not ATist. I do, however, feel great pity for the inferior ATs such as Defenders, Tankers and other such melee ATs. I feel it is important to not descriminate against these...simpler ATs, rather embrace their differences and invite them to our teams so we can start TFs when there is no one else on.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ashcraft View Post
I volunteer to be the snickering underling.

Every evil vizier needs one.
Please fill out form 36b and my people will be in contact with you presently.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Amily View Post
Actually I vote for Marut, Much more the Master Mind thwarting all princess related schemes.

However, Silas does make an excellent front man and is devoted to his work.
My dear, it is not the duty of the vizier to thwart princess-related schemes, but to plan them and see them come to fruition through the labours of his minions.

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Posted

A very important question...The Rolling Stones or The Beatles?

I'll always be a "Champion" at heart. My server away from home.

"When the people fear their government, there is tyranny; when the government fears the people, there is liberty." - Thomas Jefferson

"With great moustache comes great responsibility" - Zee Captain

 

Posted

Quote:
Originally Posted by Silas View Post
The Stones, dear boy, the Stones.
You've got my vote.

I'll always be a "Champion" at heart. My server away from home.

"When the people fear their government, there is tyranny; when the government fears the people, there is liberty." - Thomas Jefferson

"With great moustache comes great responsibility" - Zee Captain

 

Posted

Quote:
Originally Posted by Silas View Post
In 2011 I promise to increase princess-related schemes by 250%...
You'll need more other castles.

'I don't like the look of it at all,' said the King: 'however, it may kiss my hand if it likes.'
'I'd rather not,' the Cat remarked.
'Don't be impertinent,' said the King, 'and don't look at me like that!' He got behind Alice as he spoke.
'A cat may look at a king,' said Alice.

 

Posted

Quote:
Originally Posted by Silas View Post
I am unconcerned with efficiency, only opulence.
That said, formal dinnerware for state dinners: solid gold and jewel encrusted, or solid platinum?

@Demobot

Also on Steam

 

Posted

Quote:
Originally Posted by Demobot View Post
That said, formal dinnerware for state dinners: solid gold and jewel encrusted, or solid platinum?
Bah to dinnerware. Why not be hand-fed by tuxedo-wearing diamond golems?

'I don't like the look of it at all,' said the King: 'however, it may kiss my hand if it likes.'
'I'd rather not,' the Cat remarked.
'Don't be impertinent,' said the King, 'and don't look at me like that!' He got behind Alice as he spoke.
'A cat may look at a king,' said Alice.

 

Posted

This race is too one-sided. In the interests of bi-partisan princess-related schemery, I am announcing my candidacy as Evil Vizier of Champion.

I promise to focus on the real evil vizier issues of overthrowing the king (or ruling figure of your choice, I'm flexible) and putting myself in power, preferably with an all-powerful genie at my beck and call.

So if you want a REAL Evil Vizier, and not some pretender, VOTE FOR ME.

Or perish.

 

Posted

It has come to my attention that I have been nominated as a Evil Mayor-Vizier of Champion. I will humbly accept this nomination AND CRUSH ALL MY OPPONENTS BENEATH MY STEEL BOOTS OF TYRANNY after the bake sale for the local elementary school. Evil pies, evil cookies and evil cupcakes (thanks to Cherry) will be on sale. Pre-orders are accepted but the possibility of the money being embezzled is high. Purchases are mandatory otherwise the safety of your housing cannot be ensured. My running mate will be this fine upst-ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD!

I'll always be a "Champion" at heart. My server away from home.

"When the people fear their government, there is tyranny; when the government fears the people, there is liberty." - Thomas Jefferson

"With great moustache comes great responsibility" - Zee Captain

 

Posted

A potential Silas / Horus race?

Ye Gods, the stars must be right...

 

Posted

Quote:
Originally Posted by Horusaurus View Post
It has come to my attention that I have been nominated as a Evil Mayor-Vizier of Champion. I will humbly accept this nomination AND CRUSH ALL MY OPPONENTS BENEATH MY STEEL BOOTS OF TYRANNY after the bake sale for the local elementary school. Evil pies, evil cookies and evil cupcakes (thanks to Cherry) will be on sale. Pre-orders are accepted but the possibility of the money being embezzled is high. Purchases are mandatory otherwise the safety of your housing cannot be ensured. My running mate will be this fine upst-ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD!
I am afraid that while I admire your moxie, I cannot allow this.

I know not what feeble mind suggested it, but a Mayor-Vizier cannot be. One cannot be both the bumbling, powerless puppet and the scheming mastermind.

I would welcome your entrance into the world of Vizierdom, either as blithe puppet or fellow schemer, but the two roles cannot be the same man. Unless the man is schizophrenic.

To suggest otherwise is an affront to Viziers the world over and I am afraid I cannot allow it.

All glory, of course, to the Hypnotoad.

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The Melee Teaming Guide for Melee Mans

 

Posted

Quote:
Originally Posted by Silas View Post
I am afraid that while I admire your moxie, I cannot allow this.

I know not what feeble mind suggested it, but a Mayor-Vizier cannot be. One cannot be both the bumbling, powerless puppet and the scheming mastermind.

I would welcome your entrance into the world of Vizierdom, either as blithe puppet or fellow schemer, but the two roles cannot be the same man. Unless the man is schizophrenic.

To suggest otherwise is an affront to Viziers the world over and I am afraid I cannot allow it.

All glory, of course, to the Hypnotoad.
Shizo-wha-so-now? The heck is that?



He wants our nomination he does! SILAS IS A BAD MAN! He wants our power!



Yo Gollum, I'mma let you finish but Horus had one of the best nominations of all time. OF ALL TIME. An' Silas be up in here tryin' to ruin that.

...huh? was I saying something?

I'll always be a "Champion" at heart. My server away from home.

"When the people fear their government, there is tyranny; when the government fears the people, there is liberty." - Thomas Jefferson

"With great moustache comes great responsibility" - Zee Captain

 

Posted

T'was not my intention to discourage you my friend, but to make clear that the roles of Mayor and Evil Vizier are simply incompatible. It would be like a Scrapper-Defender, where the role of one is to smash face and kill things dead, whereas the role of the other is to be overestimated and do poor damage

I welcome your entrance into the race and frankly, the world needs more moustachioed, hand-wringing fiends in the backdrop to orchestrate dastardly deeds.

(All Glory to the Hypnotoad)

Support Guides for all Corruptor secondaries and Fortunatas
The Melee Teaming Guide for Melee Mans

 

Posted

As the concept of a democratically elected* evil vizier goes against the time-honored tradition of the office's appointment by the naive/foolish/senescent hereditary ruling figure, the candidates' positions on the execution of its customary duties ought to be established at the outset.

In the following standard evil vizier scenarios, what is the candidates response—

  • If one of your advisors asks, "My liege/lord/leader, he is but one man. What can one man possibly do?"

  • If your trusted lieutenant asks, "Why are you risking everything on such a mad scheme?"

  • If one of your dungeon guards expresses concern over the conditions in the beautiful princess' cell?

  • If the beautiful princess that you capture declares, "I'll never marry you! Never, do you hear me, NEVER!!!"?

  • If your are fighting with the hero/heroine atop a moving platform, have disarmed him/her, and are about to finish him/her off when he/she glances behind you and drops flat?

  • If after you've captured the hero/heroine, he/she pleads, "Before you kill me, will you at least tell me what this is all about?"
* Even a fixed election is an election.

 

Posted

All I can see it profit from making either Evil Corr Robots, that heckle and blow up others or Scrap Bots who charge in just to have things blow up around them... Oh wait.. we got masterminds in game already *Sigh*

Lead Squirrel at Dr. E Spider robotic site #643

Nothing saids its your spot like an ourob. Portal dropped on the ground.

 

Posted

Quote:
Originally Posted by TrueGentleman View Post
In the following standard evil vizier scenarios, what is the candidates response—
I'll play along, although I was intending to claim the hereditary title of Squire of Gothos (of Champion).

Quote:
Originally Posted by TrueGentleman View Post
If one of your advisors asks, "My liege/lord/leader, he is but one man. What can one man possibly do?"
Raise your index finger, ask "How many fingers am I holding up?", then poke it into his brain. Swirling it around is optional, but recommended.

Quote:
Originally Posted by TrueGentleman View Post
If your trusted lieutenant asks, "Why are you risking everything on such a mad scheme?"
"What? I'm only risking all of you."

Quote:
Originally Posted by TrueGentleman View Post
If one of your dungeon guards expresses concern over the conditions in the beautiful princess' cell?
"Well-said. Go and make her a you-skin rug."

Quote:
Originally Posted by TrueGentleman View Post
If the beautiful princess that you capture declares, "I'll never marry you! Never, do you hear me, NEVER!!!"?
"A Civil Union is fine, too."

Quote:
Originally Posted by TrueGentleman View Post
If your are fighting with the hero/heroine atop a moving platform, have disarmed him/her, and are about to finish him/her off when he/she glances behind you and drops flat?
Barrel roll! With dignity.

Quote:
Originally Posted by TrueGentleman View Post
If after you've captured the hero/heroine, he/she pleads, "Before you kill me, will you at least tell me what this is all about?"
"Who said I will ever allow you to die?"

'I don't like the look of it at all,' said the King: 'however, it may kiss my hand if it likes.'
'I'd rather not,' the Cat remarked.
'Don't be impertinent,' said the King, 'and don't look at me like that!' He got behind Alice as he spoke.
'A cat may look at a king,' said Alice.

 

Posted

Quote:
Originally Posted by TrueGentleman View Post
As the concept of a democratically elected* evil vizier goes against the time-honored tradition of the office's appointment by the naive/foolish/senescent hereditary ruling figure, the candidates' positions on the execution of its customary duties ought to be established at the outset.

In the following standard evil vizier scenarios, what is the candidates response—

If one of your advisors asks, "My liege/lord/leader, he is but one man. What can one man possibly do?"
A single good backhand slap to the face of the advisor, both for doubting me and for underestimating the enemy.

Quote:
Originally Posted by TrueGentleman View Post
If your trusted lieutenant asks, "Why are you risking everything on such a mad scheme?"
A good backhand slap and a swift boot to the backside, the former for doubting me and the latter for questioning my plans.

Quote:
Originally Posted by TrueGentleman View Post
If one of your dungeon guards expresses concern over the conditions in the beautiful princess' cell?

I narrow my eyes threateningly. This is a relatively minor offense and I shall let it slide, given my tiredness from slapping the other two cretins about.

Quote:
Originally Posted by TrueGentleman View Post
If the beautiful princess that you capture declares, "I'll never marry you! Never, do you hear me, NEVER!!!"?
I laugh heartily, thoroughly amused at the idea that she thinks she has a choice. I turn on my heel and stride out, laughing as I go. How thoughtful of her to amuse me so despite being my prisoner.


Quote:
Originally Posted by TrueGentleman View Post
If your are fighting with the hero/heroine atop a moving platform, have disarmed him/her, and are about to finish him/her off when he/she glances behind you and drops flat?
Having seen one or two of the moving pictures the youth of today are so fond of, I take the opportunity to kick them from the platform before leaping clear of the danger behind me.

Quote:
Originally Posted by TrueGentleman View Post
If after you've captured the hero/heroine, he/she pleads, "Before you kill me, will you at least tell me what this is all about?"
I tell them a false plan then allow them to escape, so that they may strive to foil the fake plan and in doing so, help further my actual plan.

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Posted

Quote:
Originally Posted by TrueGentleman View Post


In the following standard evil vizier scenarios, what is the candidates response—

If one of your advisors asks, "My liege/lord/leader, he is but one man. What can one man possibly do?"
A:Show him a series of The Tick comics/TV shows. Then go back to sipping chamomille.

Quote:
If your trusted lieutenant asks, "Why are you risking everything on such a mad scheme?"
A: Because we'll win, now fetch me the newest Hockey News, forsooth.


Quote:
If one of your dungeon guards expresses concern over the conditions in the beautiful princess' cell?
A: Send him to the Gulag Archipelago, get a new dungeon guard after dinner.

Quote:
If the beautiful princess that you capture declares, "I'll never marry you! Never, do you hear me, NEVER!!!"?
A: Then you can rot in that cell. One less self-entitled, tiara wearing socialite in the world will do us a WORLD of good.

Quote:
If your are fighting with the hero/heroine atop a moving platform, have disarmed him/her, and are about to finish him/her off when he/she glances behind you and drops flat?
A: I slide down, kick them in the face and push them off the platform. Afterwards, a helicopter throws down a rope ladder and exeunts me to my secret lair (with hidden helipad, of course).

Quote:
If after you've captured the hero/heroine, he/she pleads, "Before you kill me, will you at least tell me what this is all about?"
A: No, I'd rather you think about what this is about. Meanwhile, I have addictive sodas to sell to young children and hope to sell to the dazed and gullible populace.

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