Fox on arrival

Perez Park. Late afternoon.

The three of them set up the artifacts the way they'd been told to in the book. An item of power they'd managed to locate on EBay at each point of the fold out paper pentagram they'd made when they realised that drawing the thing on grass wasn't going to work.
"You remember what we were calling for?" One of them asked the others, laying down the bow he'd brought for protection.
"A hero." The one replied. "To speak for the animals. To protect from all who would hurt. To defend the woodlands and the streets."
"And he's gotta know and understand English as well as whatever language his animal has." Chipped in the third.
"I told you before," the second argued, "Animals don't HAVE languages like we do! It's body movements and.."
The first waved his arm. "Can we get on with it?" He asked.
"Yeah." The others agreed.

And so the chanting started.

Five minutes later, a form formed in the pentagram. Orange & black furred human feet, orange and white legs, chest and arms with black and white hands. Hands that were holding a orange and white furred head with a muzzle. Black eyes with orange pupils opened as the pentagram cracked explosively. "Owwwwww!" The figure moaned. "My father WARNED me not to scavenge in the big park! I...." The voice stopped as the figure looked at his hands. He blinked twice. "What?" He asked. He looked down. "What?" He asked. He tried to stand up and succeeded on the third attempt. "What?" He asked. "Colours?" He looked around. "I said 'What', people! This is generally a word that says.... well, WHAT?"
The first looked up shakily as the others postrated themselves for no real reason. "We... we have brought you across from the veil of animal to defend animals. We..."
"Lemmee get this straight - as your friends keep bowing to my malehood - you decided to pervert an animal to protect animals? You changed me to this?"
"Yes." He replied.
"Can you change me back?"
"W-why would we want to?"
"Because I'm asking."
"Well, possibly. I mean, the sender can recant a counter spell but..." He fell silent as an arrow punctured his neck and came out the other side. He fell over.

"Vahzilok! The third screamed. Like a girl, the fox creature thought. Which was strange as the other one had the bumps of human female. She pulled the pair of them to the trees. The dead humans, the foxcreature mused as one made his way over to the fallen idiot. "You're a hero!" The girl screamer whispered. "Can't you do something?"
"What powers do I have?" Fox replied. "I haven't exactly had time to find out. Can I lift buildings?"
"Er..."
"Can I lance hills with a glance from my eyes?"
"Er..."
"Can I headbutt trucks and survive?"
"Er..."
The girl non screamer indicated fox's hands. He looked down at them and saw they were glowing. "My fists can become night-lights??? Y'know, you'd think that three idiots who perverted the course of magic, science AND nature would at least give me something decent to work with but..." A zombie pulled back the bush they were hiding behind and, reflexes kicking in, Fox hit him. And sent him sailing 20 feet. The others began to turn. "The bow" The non-screamer shouted, "Grab the bow!" Fox dived, grabbed the unused bow the first had put down and fired an arrow straight into the eye socket of the zombie. The fly bitten creature dropped and Fox snapped off three quickfire shots at the things associate.Whereas the arrow that pierced the zombie had been normal, these ones seemed to glow as they sprang from the bow and thudded into the mortificator. When he fell, the arrows seemed to melt away, leaving no obvious trauma but the villain on the floor. "Seems you did put some good powers in." He told the others. "Bit of a surprise as you were stupid enough to use big park for this when it's crawling with nasties."
"Yeah," the girl screamer commented. "Dissolving arrows."
"And where did they come from?" Fox asked.
"I... I don't know, Mr Fox."
"Don't call me that."
"Call you what then?"
The fox creature looked at himself and at the weapon he was carrying. "For now, call me Foxbow." He looked at them. "And you ALSO forgot to think I'd need clothes, didn't you?" He asked before heading over to the fallen human.

((I like comments.))

Wow, I like it! ,
Heres hoping to hearing more from Fox's adventures.

/em,raiseglass

2 days later Atlas Park

The woman screamed again as the three Hellions pulled on her bag strap. They were NOT having it, despite all their claims to the contrary. She'd seen something hero-like a moment ago at the far end of the alley but it hadn't come. Why hadn't they helped? She could see the criminals were getting annoyed now. One of them had brought out a knife.

Then a glowing arrow had thudded into the knife holders side. She looked in surprise, as did they. THIS was a hero? "She paid for the stuff in that bag," Fox commented, "You paid for trying to get things out of it."
"Your quips stink!" One of the others remarked pulling a gun from his belt and firing. Fox watched the bullet sail past and impact with a drainpipe.
"Gotta work on them," Fox replied, notching and shooting. "You gotta work on your aim." He added as the Hellion fell, stun arrow glowing in his face. Where was the snatcher? Ah, there he was. "You know," Fox told him as he walked down the alleyway to where the hellion lay spreadeagle, "I've been humanoid two days and I'D be embarrassed to fall for THAT one! Happy trails." He fired a stun arrow into the fallen gangers back and started to unhook the tripwire he'd set up.
"Aren't you going to tag them?" The woman asked. Fox recalled the first time someone had said that. He'd thought it meant urinating on them. He'd been lucky not to be arrested that time.
"No. On my way for my hero license. Course," he added, "me not being a hero means you can put the boot in if you want. To him, I mean." He smiled. She smiled. Then she booted the fallen ganger in a place that made Fox wince.

Half an hour later, Fox sat in the interview room with a MAGI back roomer. The room was pretty empty with just a table, 2 glasses and a jug of water under a single lamp. He'd related the Perez incident and she'd taken notes. "So," she said, looking up, "You're a..." she trailed off as she saw him lapping from the jug. She looked at her own glass and decided to get a new jug of water. "You're a magic origin?" She asked.
"Well, obviously." Fox replied.
"Yes." She looked at the forms. Just a few more questions. First... Place of birth?"
"Under the red bush in the small grass area close to the huge statue with all the heros on top of it."
She paused, sucking her pen. "Atlas." She decided. "Age?"
"Um..." Fox thought hard. "About 265 nights."
"Ooookay." More pen-sucking. "We'll say eighteen. Residence?"
"If you mean where I've been living then the alley behind Midway Burger."
"No.. Fixed... abode."
"Oh, it's fixed. The dumpster's chained to the wall."
She looked askew at him. "We'll sort something out."
"Don't you require a birth certificate or passport or something?"
"In Paragon? Those are optional, Mr Fox."
"Foxbow."
"Kinda specific for a hero name. But, when you meet five 'Captain Underpants... Powers?"
"Energy fists and magic arrows. They go solid for non human, stun energy for humans and don't harm the innocents."
She looked up. "Except that one lady."
Fox shrugged. "Her sister said she didn't ask to borrow the I-pod."
"Hopes for future?"
"Um, survival?"
"Job? No. We'll sort something. That seems to be it, Mr Fox..."
"Foxbow."
"Indeed. I'll send these forms for processing and send you on to Hero accommodation services."
"Oh, good. I want a park view!"
"You can discuss that with them."
"And a license to keep rabbits." She looked back as she went out the door. He was licking his teeth.

Nice, an enjoyable little read, like the humour. Good work, i look forward to any more of your writing.

Excellent work.
Lovelly humour.

Please keep it going a bit further!

Might do a bit with him in the apartment MAGI get him.

Three days later, Galaxy City

Fox wondered how he'd gotten into this. Facing off against a group of Outcasts making an incursion to the zone and all he had as allies were a guy who thought 2x4 was a battle plan and a girl called Thunderthong who's front beachballs were so inflated they'd act as crash bags for all three of them if they were to fall over. Plus, to his humiliation, they were in a dark tunnel under the warehouse complex and neither of the others had thought to bring a flashlight.

This meant that the only person who could see fairly well in the dark had to lead the way, his fist lit up like a streetlight that said 'Put bullets here.' Thankfully, 2x4 was one of those able to headbutt bullets so Fox had already decided to slow his pace so he could get the tank in front.

But not too far in front. Thunderthong seemed to be interested in him. And that was scary. In fact he was more afraid of her than of the enemy. He thought it smart to be scared of someone who not only professed she could crush a marble head bust between her legs but actually DID it to prove it. Fox wondered if there were any wierder people in Paragon. He decided that, yes, there probably was.

The tank had come across three playmates. Fox took aim as the Amazon behind him charged past him with a yell that probably alerted everyone in the city to their presence. She Knocked out her outcast with a single punch. Fox gulped as he fired a ball of feiry energy at the third.

Two hours later, Foxs' apartment.

Fox opened the door and gestured the Amazon in. "I think the phone's connected. You can call a cab."
She walked into the room. With the exception of the sofa and a 15" TV in the corner, it was empty. "Just moved in?" She asked.
"Yes. MAGI rented the place. Phone's over there." Fox pointed to the side of the sofa.
"I don't know how to thank you for this," she said. "Fox had ideas. Like calling a cab and leaving his house. Being prey wasn't fun.
"No problem." He replied. "After they cut your belt off and it got damaged by you accidentally standing on it five times it was the least I could do as I live nearby." He decided to go into the kitchen as he heard her dialling. She made the call - Fox listened and found he could JUST hear the tinny voice on the other end of the line - and wondered if he should ever bother filling the fridge? He'd been told food went in there but it had seemed impractical. Especially after the Microwave thing. He'd been told that food was good after being heated in that thing. So he'd gone out, caught a chicken and shoved it it. The beak had missed his head by inches as it impaled the wall close to him.

"Anything to eat whilst I'm waiting?" She asked.
Fox considered. "Um, I got bread." He said. "And butter. He looked down at the remaining rabbit in the cage. "And meat." He added.
"Anything vegitarian?" She asked. Fox looked at the kitchen table and gulped. The bones of a rabbit were on the table. And one fuzzy ear. And the red tablecloth wasn't normally red. He thought it'd be best to get rid of it rather than offend her. She could juggle coconuts with her biceps. It'd be smart not to annoy her. He covered the carcass with the tablecloth and pulled. Then he whined slightly. The blood had seeped through and stuck the tablecloth to the table. He put one foot on the table and pulled.

He managed to pull the cloth off and put it in the kitchen bin before he made her a bread and butter thing. Was he supposed to dip the bread in or something? "How do I make these?" He asked.
"You don't know how to make a sandwich?" She asked.
"I don't normally put my food between bread slices." He checked his watch. How long had passed since she called? One day, he thought, he'd have to learn how to tell time.
She started to come into the kitchen. Nice to get a warning, he thought as her cleavage entered first. Don't look in the bin, he added mentally. Don't look in the..
"So, where do you sleep?" She asked. He thought of something. Like a light going on.
"Oh, I got a pile of Earth in a second room on the right. I sleep there."
"You.... sleep on earth?"
"Yes. And don't ask how to use the shower. I dunno coz I never bother with it. Too much like rain."
"You... don't bathe?"
"Oh, of course I bathe!"
She relaxed.
"I often go for swims in that pond down there." He pointed out of the window to the small park and Algae-covered pond. "Is that your cab?" He asked as a car drove by.
"Yes, it is." She replied, heading out the door. She was on the pavement before the door shut.

Fox laughed.

((Thunderthong is not based on any toon I know of. Any such happening is purely co-incidental. Soz.))

Foxbow wondered if he was having what one of those strange humans he'd met in the night-club had referred to as a 'bad hair day'.

Really speaking, it had started there with the young human cub who'd insisted on calling him 'doggie' and petting him like he was a household pet. Although if it hadn't been for her, he might have made more of a fool of himself and asked the scantily clad human female serving if she was in heat and was looking for a mate. Where were her nipples? He shook his head.

This morning he'd been summoned down into the sewers not once but three times to hunt down Vahzilok and thorns that were attempting to bomb, pollute or reproduce down there. The rats were delicious but the regular showers that hit him from above were not so. One of those humans had a bad gastric complaint, Fox was sure of it.

He'd gone back to his apartment to discover the power was cut off. A call to MAGI had set it straight this time. Pelicans, it seemed, were not the only thing with big bills.
Fortunately, MAGI were buying all the bones he could produce from rabbits. Bone casting was the next big prophecy thing, he was told. Fox wondered sarcastically how long they'd known that.

He was thankful they'd given him a bathrobe. Because, after showering, Fox remembered he only had the one set of clothes and he tended to flood the kitchen every time he used the washing machine. The only option was something called a 'Dry cleaners' downstairs.

One hour and three powerfully thumped Hellions later, he paid for the cleaning with cash he'd found in the Buckshot's pockets and changed in the shop - bringing a lot of attention from the street outside - and decided to head out on patrol. Fox considered heading to see his father but, after the last time when his father had yapped 'you're not my son, he's little, amusing and not human' before running round and round in circles and braining himself on a tree, Fox decided it could wait.

Which brought him to now and the obscene amount the clothier was attempting to load onto Fox's MAGI credit card. He pointed at the sign that mentioned Heros got discount when showing their ID card.

"Yes, but you're just unusual." The manager replied, when fox had refused to take the same answer from the assistant.
"I work for MAGI." Fox protested. "In their... bone-casting department."
"So do many clerks. Not all heros, Mr... Fox."
"Foxb... oh, what's the point? No-one calls me it."

The manager opened his mouth to reply but the sound of Klaxxons cut him off. Then he stared in alarm at his monitors as three Rikti appeared in the store.
"Excuse me whilst I go do something heroic for my discount." Fox remarked, standing and pulling out his bow before walking out the door.
The manager turned to the guard standing to his left. "Maybe he is a hero?" The manager asked hopefully.
"Where the hell did that bow come from?" Replied the guard.

Yay more story.

And may I say, probably the most amusing yet, some of those jokes are actually pure Gold.. then bone casting/prophecy is inspired. And the guard comment at the end. Love it mate, keep it coming. I might have to meet Mr Fox... sorry Foxbow at some point, an interesting chappy indeed.

Peace out,

Inf.

Early Evening, King's Row

Foxbow was running. The sirens had just sounded as he made his way out from watching the mating rituals at Pocket D andhe wanted to get to the coin before the Rikti arrived. He could see a number of heros waiting for the incoming invaders and thought how this proved there was no really intelligent life out there. The Rikti modus Operetta, or whater it was called, seemed to be locate the fighting good guys and beam the forces down, a few at a time, into them. Fox considered a smarter way would be to watch them assemble near the training guy, watch him take control, then beam down forces in High park. Use a steamroller.

Fox blinked ad wondered how many of these Heroes Serge was having a joke on. Colours that defied description, styles that looked... Well, a bathrobe on a Troll? And that had to be a Captain Underpants! Where did he keep his ID? Fox decided not to ask.

All of a sudden the fight began as the aliens beamed in. Fox notched his triple arrow and fired, watching with satisfaction as one sailed harmlessly through an ally to impale a monkey behind him. The second damaged the armour of a guardian and the third hit an unarmoured conscript in the neck. Fox ducked as a blade sailed over his head. He stood up and blocked the second swipe with his bow. "Query?" He thought he heard the Rikti ask. "Wood?"
Fox grunted. "Oh, like I fraggin' know!?" He ducked sideways, releasing the resistance to the blade and fired off a shot as the Rikti reoriented himself. Then he hit the enemy hard with a glowing fist. That, he thought as he felt a finger break, was a mistake. Never hit a guy when he's wearing space-age combat armour... At least the enemy had the decency to look a bit stunned. Fox fired another arrow as the rest of the fight seemed to be dying down. It finished thier little squabble. And the alien fell on Fox.

Fox whined and strained. By the moon, this headman was heavy! A figure appeared and almost effortlessly shifted the comatose weight from Fox before sending down a hand. Fox looked up and blinked. This was a big, stocky human with shining eyes, dark blonde head fur and a suit of bright primary colours that meant FOx could hardly look at him.
"Up you get, Mr Fox." The voice said, in an accent that Fox could identify as British.
"Sam." Fox replied, taking the hand and being pulled upright. "Name's Foxbow but no-one uses it, just calling me Mr Fox so I chose a first name."
Was that... puzzlement on the human's face? "And you chose Sam?" It asked. "Sam... Fox?"
Fox nodded.

"Good to meet you... Sam." He replied as another wave of enemies started arriving. "Name's Britanic." he turned towards the enemy and started running. "And they can KISS MY FLAG FLYING *ss!!" He added, taking down a guardian and a conscript with a double flying clothesline.
Fox thought about that as he notched an arrow and fired at a Monkey. One, he was not wearing a flag and two, it was not attached to his rear end by any pole Fox could see. Humans...

A moment passed before Fox decided he needed space. That last dagger had been too close. Like, here's my ribs, please skewer me like a kebab close. That coin, he thought as Blue Steel thrust the pointy end of his shield into the neck joint of a headman's armour and twisted. The top would be fine. As long as it doesn't fall over. He sucked in a breath and decided to try and jump as a drone exploded somewhere close. He'd found he was good at jumping but, even then... He jumped for it.

I'm flying! That was fox's thought as he sailed over the coin. I'm flying, I'm... dropping? That building's coming awfully...

One mediport and a muzzle adjustment later, Fox rejoined the fight. He found himself protecting a hurt archer close to the entrance of King's Row police station. The guy had a busted leg, a busted bow and a busted mediport. Triple down, Fox thought. He was getting exhaused now. Two Guardians, Two headmen, one monkey and a drone he'd defeated. Exhausted but exhilarated. Ther was nothing he couldn't... He looked up and whined as the Heavy Assault Suit came down. It's companions were engaging the heros on the other side but this one had decided to pick on one and a half archers. It was almost at ground level now. It's mistake, Fox thought, coming up with a desperate idea. His friend had almost passed out but it wasn't him Fox wanted. It was his quiver. Fox figured that he was going to be lucky for a few more shots as the suits energy cannons frazzled his fur. Close but he had the arrow he needed. He pulled the bow up and around and fired the explosive arrow he'd borrowed. And missed the suit. Missed it by quite some way, in fact. It hit the base of a statue and blew concrete away. Fox smiled as the Suit zeroed in on him. He could see it's cannons powering up. He could also see that his shot had hit it's target and wondered if the suit's controller knew it was about to be hit by about 100 tonnes of coin...

"No coin jokes." He told the fallen archer as the fight ended.

((Ta to Britanic for permission!))

Foxbow looked at his contact as though he couldn't quite believe what he was being asked to do. Which was accurate. Blame's on me, Fox thought, for having a contact who seemed to live out of a box despite calling himself a Doctor. "You want me to do what?" He asked.
His contact sniffed and blew something gelatinous into a hankie. Fox declined his invite to see and wondered if this guy was really a doctor or a patient. Still, he was usually on the money. "I needs ya to go to a base in Talos Island and locate some stolen technology. Simple mission."
"If it's so simple, why am I doing it?"
"Coz the other guy I told lost an arm."
"Oh, lovely."
"Just kidding." Fox sniffed. Either he was just kidding or this guy was a practised liar. "I thought you'd be good after you rescued those guys from the Council."
"Yeah, I was wondering about that..." Fox paused. "My bow only harms the guilty so how come I accidentally woundedd one of the hostages?"
"They were lawyers. And, if you haven't heard that word before, I think you'll hear it a lot in a few days... So, this mission. You'll be up against the freakshow and..."

Fox interrupted. "Blind or stupid?"
"Pardon?"
"These Freakshow, are they blind or stupid?" Fox hauled up the disguise he'd been given to wear. Plastic blades that stuck three feet up from red rubber shoulderpads with refined plastic body armour and a four foot long arm with pincers made from recycled cans and a showercap with a ruff attached.
"Did this cost you $10 from the local buy and save?"
"Fiftee... I mean, it's ergonomically designed and supplied by SERAPH! Look, you need to put it on."

Fox sat on the train in a compartment all his own and wondered how that idiot won the argument. He couldn't pull his bow out with this thing on. He couldn't even scratch and itch he had. Still, at least the ticket collector hadn't checked his ticket. Seems the people weren't looking too closely. If they had, they'd notice that one of his fingers appeared to have come from a pull off lid to t cat food tin. Fox hoped no-one he knew saw him.

The base he'd marked was about a mile from the station in Talos. A mile full of bad guys and heroes wanting to hurt him. No option. He was going to have to jump it.

He wasn't fond of his jump ability, despite the effect of protecting him when he fell a long way. He'd practised - once - by dropping off a tall building. He'd thrown up in the bushes. Actually, he'd also thrown up on the way down and had to wipe it off after he beat it to the ground.

He opened the door and walked in. After three attempts to get the blades in, he ducked forward and entered.

"Hey," a voice said from his left, "What happened to you?" He looked around and saw a Juicer chief, his armour resplendent in steel but marked with dirt and blood.
"Er... Budget was tight when I was brought in." Fox remarked.
The Chief leant in closer. Fox could smell the hot dogs he'd eaten. With piccalilli. "Get a shave." He remarked before heading off.
"Blind AND stupid." Fox said wonderingly, heading further into the cave.

Five minutes later, Fox was running, full pelt back up the passageway, the fake arm lost and deep gashes in the plastic armour. Someone had see through the bluff as he claimed he was moving the computer hard-drive to a 'back-up facility'. Unfortunately, Fox thought breathlessly, the leaders hadn't had lobotomies yet! He sent an arrow at the door and watched it explode. That was new, he thought, before realising it was a grenade from the pursuing Smasher that had done it. He dove for the destroyed door...

And his shoulder spikes hit the door frame. He wondered why there wasn't any pursuit. He looked around and smiled. There was no pursuit because the smasher had jammed himself into the passageway and no-one could get around him.

Fox removed the pads, waved bye bye and legged it, wondering what an arrow might do to his contact.

((Wot, no comments? Paranoia! Paranoia!))

Foxbow wondered if this was a good day or a bad day. On the plus side, he thought he might have a girlfriend. He wasn't sure about this because he wasn't in the mating season and, as far as he knew, neither was she. He'd started off by just trying to comfort her with an arm around her shoulders and it had ended with her licking him. Yes, that was the other part. She was feline and Fox was not exactly sure how he was going to mention that part to his father. The good thing was, he didn't HAVE to tell him...

The bad thing was that he seemed to be spending most of his time today down in the sewers. The walking dead men were down here, infecting things. His more reliable contract - well, she had an office.. Ok, a street corner all to herself with a windowbox she stored files in and lived under a nice part of Skyway - had pointed him this way with the information that they were trying to infect the sewers. Fox pointed out that, if they had anything infectious that wasn't already in the sewers it'd be a miracle. She'd insisted though, saying that the sewer water was cleaned, purged with chemicals and became drinking water again. Fox thought he had to drink more bottled water. At least that came from hills.

Anyway, she'd convinced him that the evil Doctor Vahzilok was up to something down there. Fox sighed and thought of the decontamination shower he had to take every time he came out of the pipes. He asked why she hadn't told the Freedom Phalanx if it was such an emergency. They were engaged. He headed into the green dankness.

Three decontamination showers later, he'd tracked down the doctor. He'd physically removed all six of the bodies the doctor was experimenting in and on, which meant he'd gone through this goddess-damned sewer section 12 times now! He had one last task he had to try...

From a distance, Fox surveyed the scene. 2 zombies and a creature so massive and patchwork it had to be Vahzilok himself. Body ooks like he'd been taking Rage and facial looks like he'd been taking frying pans. Biceps that could break buses and a gun that could shoot Blue Whales. Well, Fox thought, checking his mediport was still working, nothing ventured... He raised the bow. And lowered it. Nothing ventured??? He asked himself. Nothing ventured, nothing amputated! He made up his mind to leave, fast as possible.

That's when Doc Vahzilok spotted him. He pulled the bowstring so hard it almost sliced through his fingers. And released. His sniper shot sliced through the air, cutting past both zombies before impacting on the Doc's arm. "Ow." He said.
'Oh fu..' Fox moaned, diving out of sight as bullets stitched the floor. He felt one hit his leg and grunted. Lucky Doc Vahz hadn't fired the grenade, he figured. He could hear the massive figure sloshing through the muck at quite a pace. Poking his head around the pipe, Fox fired off a couple of quick-fire arrows and ducked back behind the pipe. He heard Vahzilok swear and wondered what he'd hit. He also knew that staying here wasn't a smart idea.

Fox legged it limpingly across the gap, into the passage beyond. Or at least, he tried to. The doctor Grabbed him by the leg, picked him up and threw him back towards he'd left his gun. Fox hit his head on it and examined the stars in the sewers for a second before remembering the titan attacking him. His bow lay where the doctor had grabbed him, so he decided to try his nite-ligt fists. The upper cut caught the doctor by surprise and lifted him off his feet. Fox winced as that finger broke again. More milk, he thought, before wondering if he could use the doc's gun. No, he decided, there was an arrow lodged in the barrel. He dodged back around towards his bow, Smashing the doctor again as he went. The doctor's reply, broke two ribs. before Fox hit him with Energy thrust, throwing him back into the reservoir of slime and sludge. Fox gasped and grabbed his bow. He blinked and tried to clear the double vision before aiming. He wished desperately for a powerful arrow.

Doctor Vahzilok looked on in alarm as he saw the arrow ignite. "You idiot!" He roared, reversing his course and running from Fox, "Not down here!" Fox released the suddenly burning arrow.

Twenty feet from Fox, the fire arrow ignited the sewer methane. The explosion threw Fox back twenty feet and stunned him. He was brought back to his senses by the tidal wave of human sewage.

Bad day, he thought, trying to dislodge something semi solid from his nose.

Awesome work! Very funny Mr. Fox *smirks*
Keep up the good work!

Another enjoyable little read there Mr. Fox; Vahzilok was my first AV and i was so excited when i was asked to help defeat him. Its when the game really took off for me as i had read the comics and here he was straight out of em, the man that had supplied the baddies for a large majority of my missions. Well told.

I know the feeling. He used to kick the bejesus out of anyone I sent against him.

Foxbow thought over the events of the last few days.

His girlfriend had moved into his small, bare, apartment. Despite the fact that he'd given the Feline the bed matress each night and retired to the sofa for each night, she kept on finding her way into the living room close to him. He didn't really mind, per se, but he wasn't sure what the next stage was. She wasn't in heat, he wasn't in season... What next?

Anyhow, he'd gone to see a new contact this morning. She was having trouble with the post office over a large package, it seemed, and wondered if Foxbow could deliver it for her? She said she'd send it by post but it'd cost a packet and, as she thought Fox needed to go to Striga anyway...

He asked her where Striga was and she said it was somewhere to the east. He needed to ask at the Dockyards for a lift. Ok, Fox thought. Just so long as there wasn't water involved. So he agreed cautiously. And then she handed him something that looked disturbingly like a hatbox and said that it was meant only for her friend Stephanie. She said it contained important documents.

Fox managed to find passage on a cargo boat and only realised what he'd done when he set foot on the boat. Smells wafted up from the hold. Fish. Fox wasn't fond of fish. In fact, of all the meat groups, fish was his least favourite. It ranked below carrots in the things he'd eat. Still, be strong. The smell wasn't that much... and the deck wasn't moving that much...

Ten minutes later, Fox was in his cabin for the short trip. He'd had to apologize and give the few notes he had to the dockworker who'd been the recipient of Foxs' breakfast and previous night's dinner, rat heads and all, but he was sure that he'd been locked in for his own convenience. No food until he reached the landing place, Fox decided.

Fox was first off the boat when they reched Striga, which was unexpected as his door was still locked. He'd climbed out of the porthole and into the next cabin in an area of clear sea because his own cabin had sort of gotten really smelly. Different boat back, he decided. Or hitch a ride on a flying hero.

Lots of council around, he noted. A veritable council of council he thought, snickering at his little joke. And a family of Family. That one didn't seem so funny. Probably because of the Consiglieri and his posse on the walkway. "Whaddya got in the box, vermin?" The boss asked, in a bad Italian accent.
"Property of a lady." Fox replied. "Is that Italian as spoken in Italy or Italian as faked by Bronxites?" He added, quickly checking out boxes with his eyes. Good crates, nice crates."
"It ain't wise to diss the boss!" A gunnar commented, in an Italian accent that was a massive improvement on the bosses.
"I insult the boss and you guys plug me?" Fox asked. "In that case, I apologize." He gave a little smile. "Ialso wonder why they're working for you..."
"Coz I'd smush'em if'n they EVA tried anythin'!"
"So," Fox opined, "You're tough, you're hard and you need protection against one little hero?"
He looked red. "I don' need NUTHIN'" He turned to his men. "Put youse guns down! This is 'tween me'n'im!" His men lowered their weapons as the boss charged in. Fox smiled. Now he only had one to beat. Fox sidestepped the boss, hit him with an Energy punch, wrapped his free arm around the bosses waist and launched himself into the air before his men could react. Seventy feet further on, and 100 ft further up, Fox dropped the boss into the sea and jumped a few mre times before landing close to Stephanie's address.

She took the packeage off him and asked him inside. He waited whilst she opened the box. "Oh, good," she declared, "The Council movements she said she'd send." It was just a few papers and Fox wondered why such a big box. For a few seconds anyway. "And the hat I asked her to get me!" She pulled out a yellow, widebrim, hat with daisys in the banding.

Foxbow sighed.

This is great, I'm really enjoying it! Foxx approves of Fox! Heh!

((Ok, I'm gonna use this one to show another of my toons - Juniper A.K.A. Wild Child - but it does address something I've always been a touch concerned about with the game.))

Foxbow was concerned. His contact in the island of Talos had told him the Council were holding a contact of hers... somewhere. She didn't know where they were hiding him or when they'd grabbed him or why or where from but she did think the council knew. She'd ignored Foxs' comment that he was glad someone knew and asked him to go check a local base for clues. Great, Foz thought, she knows where the base is but has let them build up forces before sending in one person to look for clues that may not be there to lead to someone who, almost certainly, wasn't there. Wonderful. He had the sneaking suspicion this was going to hurt.

And he'd mated with his girlfriend last night. Was that some sort of omen? Perhaps. But... It was another thing for him to be confused about.

He landed close to the small, wooden, door in Steel Canyon and sniffed it. He'd been told that Council sometimes booby trap these doors. He'd never seen it but... Fox suddenly remembered that he had no idea what unexploded explosives smelt of and opened the door with an energy punch. He reckoned that he'd been spied by several cameras anyway so the destruction of the door wasn't going to give him away. He entered the base and fired off three quickfire shots to disable the nearest trooper. Before tagging the man - all six feet six inches of him - Fox removed his helmet and put it on, squashing down his ears. He liked his ears - they helped him to hear for one thing - but the Council used a LOT of bullets and the concealed armour in his jacket only protected so much. He ran down the tunnel.

Ten minutes later, Fox put his head down and charged a Galaxy Adjutant. He was the last standing in the base this far and Fox could see what he was standing in front of. A computer. Great, Fox thought as his helmeted bonce collided with the officer's stomach, computers. Fox stood quickly as the Galaxy doubled over and brought his helmet hard into the face mask of the enemy. Fox grimaced and involuntarily closed his eyes on impact and the Galaxy took advantage to slam a fist into Foxs muzzle.

Fox spat a tooth out and decided to get annoyed. He recognised that tooth, it was his favourite one. Three heavy punches and an energy arrow to the groin and the Adjutant was down. Now for the information. Fox looked at the computer and decided he was in trouble. How do you turn these things on again?

Two minutes of thought later, he decided to call a friend called Luna Starbright. He'd met her a few times and she'd given him her telephone number in case he ever needed help. Now he did. He dialled the number. "Hello, Luna's phone!" Said a bright voice that obviously wasn't Luna's.
"Um... hello?" Fox asked. "Is Miss Luna there?"
"No." The voice replied. "I picked up her phone by accident this morning. I didn't realise until I got a romantic phone call on the machine from my brother. I'm Juniper. Is this an emergency? I can call her and pass it on." Fox waited for her to pause for breath and then relayed the situation to the girl. Luna had mentioned a 'Juni' last time he'd met her and this Juniper was probably the same girl. He heard her tut several times. He finished and asked for a reply. He got one.

"I love how these council caves have mobile antennas built in so their people can communicate with the outside world as normal." Said a voice behind him that made Fox jump and bang his helmeted head on the rock ceiling. "Superjump in a cave is silly." The girl remarked sweetly as Fox stared at her and cursed his head wound at the same time. She was small and thin with blue trousers and a red t-shirt and green jacket. She had long length blonde hair and utterly human looks. She looked about 12. But she wasn't afraid. He remarked that she didn't seem shocked by his looks and she shrugged. "My brother's a tiger, his girlfriend's a human/alien cross and I'm an animal shapeshifter. Nothing surprises me these days."
"Oh." Fox said simply as the girl turned herself translucent.
"I don't normally use my human look in council bases." She explained. "I'd just left school. Now, let's take a peek at this. Oh, as for how I got here so fast? Like the rest of my powers it's 'don't ask, don't tell 'kay?" Fox wondered who Kay was. Juniper tossed him a bag. "Hold this for a moment?" She told him. He noted several books including the 'History of the world' by Stephen Hawkings, 'Atlas Shrugged' by Aynn Rand, 'Psychology' by Mr Spock, The 2008 'Jacky' annual and 'Bomb disposal for dummys'. She set up something next to the computer and began typing faster than Fox could keep up. "old," she muttered, "should've updated their firewalls." Fox notched an energy arrow. He could hear people running down the passageway towards them. He got ready to fire. "Wanna see something funny?" The girl asked but Fox paid her no attention. "Yeah." He said absently. He could see them coming now. Five of them, running as fast as they could towards the room. Three might get here but the other two...
What?

The five soldiers shot past Fox at 50 miles an hour and slammed into the far wall. He spared them a quick glance and fired arrows into them whilst they were stunned by the impact. Fox stared at the girl, who had her back to him. "Don't ask." She said, moving the hand she had pointed at the passageway back to the computer.
"Don't tell." Fox replied.
"Got it." She said. You want print out or disc?"
Fox stared blankly.

((And the thing that puzzled? How come every hero, from the caveman recently defrosted to the alien from a sillicon universe, knows how to hack computers?))

((Oh, and ta, Luna.))

Easy, they just bring up the windows paper clip.

"It looks like your trying to hack the Council database, do you need some help?"

Should have used Linux


Excellant story as usual, good to see you aren't running out of ideas

Foxbow bounced from rooftop to rooftop on his way south. He'd been thinking about getting something to eat but he'd recieved a call from Detective Frasenbaker which meant he had special visitor privileges at the Ziggurat. It seemed the Detective needed some information from an inmate and had cleared Fox to make a deal. Fox had been closer to Bricks than the station so... Hang on.

Fox glanced downwards to below where a crane was lifting several dozen barrels. He knew that the crane would swing around and place the drums on a cargo ship but that wasn't what held his attention. There were Family hoods down there, arguing amongst themselves over who got what cut whilst their boss stood aside. Something about him looked familiar... They hadn't seen him. Fox took aim at the weakest link and fired. As always, his arrow took on the best form to defeat it's taget and snapped the cable holding the pallets in the air. "Heads up!" He called, being fair and giving them a warning as the cargo thundered back towards the ground. He enjoyed watching them panic as the pallets, drums and crates smashed into the ground, scattering wood, oil, chemicals and hoods on impact. Half of them didn't look like they could get up. Just the boss to deal with, Fox thought to himself as he jumped to a nearby stack of boxes.

"YOU!" The boss roared and Fox finally placed him.
"Hey!" He called. "I remember you! From Striga, right? I gave you a dip!"
"You dropped me half a mile out!" The boss roared. "But that won't happen this time!" He charged and jumped up close to Fox. He ducked Fox's punch and powered one of his own into Sam's ribs.
"I better ad-adapt then." Fox gasped. He slammed his palm into the criminal's midriff, sending him flying back into the chemicals. Then he fired a blazing arrow into the chemicals, starting a feiry inferno that Fox knew would be doused by the fire tenders within minutes. But that still left the boss burning. He couldn't leave him like that, Fox thought. And smiled. There was a lot of harbour about here...

Upon arrival at the prison, Fox first checked that the boss had been teleported to the med centre all right and then found his way to an empty room where he was to await the prisoner he needed to talk to. No counsel. This was, after all, informal. A guard would keep watch. Five minutes later the prisoner was brought in. Un armoured he looked like a normal citizen but Fox knew that, armoured, he was an Arachnos commander. Fox had taken down his cell yesterday and he still felt the bruises from this guys' fists. Just as he could see the impact of his punces on the commander. "Hello." Fox said brightly, lifting a pack of 'Dukin' Donuts' he'd bought at the nearby station shop onto the table. "I bring gifts." Scanned gifts, he thought. Everything had been scanned on entrance and they still didn't know he had the ability to pull bows and arrows from no-where. He sat down as the prisoner eyed up the donuts.

A klaxxon sounded in the distance. "What's that?" Fox asked, snapping to alert.
"Escape attempt." The prisoner remarked. "Don't concern yourself. Be here long enough and you get used to it."
Fox looked at him. "You've been here one day."
The prisoner shrugged. "What's this about?" He asked.
"Detective Frasenbaker has authorised me to make a deal. He needs information and may be able to help you out here."
"The mountie?" The prisoner considered, before choosing a lemon curd donut. "Aways reminds me of Paul Gross. If it were anyone else... Go on." He said, taking a bite.
Fox wondered who Paul Gross was. Nevermind. "We know Arachnos is gonna hit the Faultline Bank sometime in the next day or so and we'd like to know when."
"Simple." The criminal replied. "What's in it for me?"
"Well, he can't get you out, of course but he can see about getting you transferred to the medium security wing. We'd keep your name out of it, of course and you'd get a chance to do some courses, stay out of your cell for a longer period of the day, earn some cash, get a cell with a view..."
"I HAVE a cell with a view."
"Of the Sewage works, I hear? You'd see the garden from this one. It's not a bad deal."
"Not a good one either, Mr Fox. I want out."
"Oh, then you want the 'no deal' option?"
He looked up. "There's a no deal option?"
"Oh, yes!" Fox said enthusiastically. "If you say no, then we get you transferred to an open prison! Of course, this is the day AFTER Frasenbacker's next big Arachnos bust and we leak info saying you helped us."
The commander's face fell. "Recluse would kill me!"
Fox nodded, still smiling.

"1430 this afternoon." Fox said into the phone a few minutes after leaving the prison. "Good thing he wasn't smart enough to know that, as a Canadian detective, you don't have any sort of official power down here. Tell Sister Psyche Hi when she gets them, yeah?"

This is not bad not bad at all keep it coming.

Foxbow sat on the sofa and thought his brain was turning to mush. He'd come back from his midnight snack hunt and was watching night-time television whilst his rabbit was digesting. His mate had gone further in her hunting and hadn't got back yet. She liked solo hunts. Solitary cat thing, Fox thought. Which left him watching Star Trek. An episode where the one with the shiny head was acting as a lawyer - or something - for the pasty head with the crazed eyes. Some humans liked this sort of thing. For Fox it was confusing as they were also the bad guys in several of the films and the shiny head wasn't the captain and... He changed channels. Ah, the Babylon station. At least there the enemy stayed the enemy and no-one was wearing food on their foreheads. Except possibly the peacock race.

The phone rang. Thankfully, Fox picked up the reciever. <Is this Sam Fox?> Said a voice. Male, Fox thought. British. He groaned. He knew where this was going. But not why.
"Yes." He replied.
<What size are your breasts?> Laughter and a dead tone. Fox hung up. Why they chose to do this around 0100 he didn't know. He'd told MAGI and they'd asked the phone company to trace all the calls Fox got to his listed number. The phone rang again. He picked it up. "34DD." He said sadly.
<Mr Fox?> Said a distorted voice. Fox sat up. Prank callers didn't normally use electronic distortion.
"Well, this is Mr Foxs' phone and it is 0130 so I'd say yes."
<I'm going to kill you.>
"Oh, good. Can you do it during one of those talk shows where humans just shout at each other?"
<No. It'll happen soon. You put my brother in the Zig. He's now in intensive care after you made him talk. You will die for that.>
One more thing to worry about, Fox thought, glancing over at the kitchen where soapy water was flowing over the lino after he'd put his jacket in the wash.
<Not sounding so smart now, are you, hero?> The voice said. Fox could just hear someone else at the other end. <What?> The main speaker said. <Yeah, yeah. Look, I'll be done in a minute and you can close the station then, Ok? I JUST NEED A MINUTE! Ok.> He added, speaking to Fox again. <Where was I?>
"Threatening me." Fox reminded him. "But, look, you seem to be in a hurry so why don't we schedule this for lunch tomorrow at the Galaxy Pizza place? 1300?I mean my mate's just come in. Gotta go!" Fox replaced the handset and unplugged the telephone. Then he made a call on his mobile. Then he waited for Kitisha to return.

Lunchtime the next day, Fox pushed open the door of the busy fast food restaurant and made his way over to the table where a T-shirted hulk-a-like was seated. He smiled and sat opposite, placing a thin envelope on the table. "You got my brother put in hospital." The man growled. "Tell me why I don't want to kill you here and now?"
Fox considered that a rhetorical question. "I dunno who your brother was but he was obviously the smart one." Fox commented. All of a sudden he found himself pinned to the wall by his shoulders. What, Fox wondered stupidly, had happened to the table? Oh, he realised, there it was, crushing his legs as it was pressed between them. "He's in intensive care with both legs and arms broke and two cracked ribs after talking with you after you arrested him in the first place! How the hell does that count as smart??"
Fox handed him the envelope and he took a photo out of it. It was himself he was looking at. Security camera footage. "My calls are monitored." Fox explained. "You not only called from a public place but actually MET me when I arranged a meet in a place that MAGI could stack with powers? Half the people here are packing powers or guns."
"Huh?" The thug grunted as he heard multiple guns cocking behind him.
"Dunno who your brother is," Fox commented as his shoulders were released and his feet hit the floor, "But he's GOTTA be smarter than you!"