Citizen Razor's Attempt at a Review Thread
By
Armsman,
Posted on: 2009-07-11 15:38 in Mission Architect
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Does it *have* to be a Vanguard warhead container?
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The internal logic works better if it is (see below for the whys of it). But not pissing off the player > subtle internal story hint.
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OK, so we're framing Malta for the attack on the Nemesis base ... but why are we attacking Nemesis in the first place?
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This is Longbow Black Ops. It's what we do. Didn't you get the memo?
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The Infiltrator project is Crey's, so what does Nemesis have to do with it in the first place? That part either needs to be scrapped or explained better.
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Well, Nemesis has nothing to do with it at all, actually, Nemesis is a big honking MacGuffin. The internal story logic (is supposed to go) something like this:
Orange finds out Malta may be siphoning tech goodies from Vanguard.
Longbow being Longbow, rather than doing the intelligent thing, picking up the phone, calling the nearest DPO and saying 'Hey, somebody in your outfit is supplying your latest tech to Malta' they decide to run their own investigation. The only thing better than sending in teams of goons with miniguns and flamethrowers to put down a bank robbery is rubbing Vanguard's collective face in the dirt. And if they can nail some Malta in the process? Score!
Simple, direct investigations being entirely out of the question, Orange comes up with a Cunning Plan (and this is where the player comes in):
- 'creatively borrow' some Vanguard psi warheads. Meticulously file off all serial numbers and evidence of manufacture.
- using a convenient tool (ie. you), infiltrate a Nemesis base and blow it up with said psi warheads. (In the background, drop a hint or two pointing in the direction of the Malta base where your informant has said the files on the Vanguard theft operation are held).
- when the Nemesis retaliate, send in your disposable tool (that's you again) to collect the files, leaving Malta and Nemesis to kill each other while you decide on the most embarassing way to spring your new information on Vanguard. If things work out *really* well, the Malta mole will catch a stray toxic gas round in the fighting.
- ??
- profit!
The antepenultimate step, of course, is where things go haywire for Orange's Simple And Concise Plan - discovering a nasty Crey project in the works wasn't on the agenda, and needs dealing with ASAP.
And if Orange's little plan to use concealed identities and hero puppets to set Nemesis and Malta at each other's throats doesn't seem that different from Crey's scheme to memory download, clone, and replace heroes to infiltrate various supergroups? Then you've hit another reason for the arc's title.
Thanks for your comments.
The bios were in response to a review asking for details, but you are right.... There are multiples so unless MAL is making clones, I need to address that.
As to the warnings about it being hard.... Well I didn't make them. My intent was to be fairliy easy to play on solo, so someone could enjoy (sorry you didn't) the story. With upped level of difficulty and teams it has been challenging (I guess that all depends on your uberness).
Is there a way to remove the warnings that make it look SO hard, when in fact at a low difficulty setting, it is fairly easy?
@Gypsy Rose
In Pursuit of Liberty - 344916
The Vigilante - 395861
Suppression - 374481 - Winner of The American Legion's February 2011 AE Author Contest
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As to the warnings about it being hard.... Well I didn't make them. My intent was to be fairliy easy to play on solo, so someone could enjoy (sorry you didn't) the story. With upped level of difficulty and teams it has been challenging (I guess that all depends on your uberness).
Is there a way to remove the warnings that make it look SO hard, when in fact at a low difficulty setting, it is fairly easy?
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The only thing I can think of is to adjust the power of your customs so that their powerset is not on the "extreme" setting anymore. If they were not ... then it's probably a bug that you can't really do anything about until the devs decide to fix it.
Play my MA arcs!
Tracking Down Jack Ketch - ArcID #2701
Cat War! - ArcID #2788
I midaswell toss my newest arc in here. I'll try to play one of yours as well when I have time.
Arc Name: BE Prologue: Gangs United
Arc ID: 250480
Author: @Ozzie Arcane
Morality: Heroic
Length: 4 Missions
Level Range: 10-20
Enemy Groups: Hellions, Trolls, Vahzilok, Custom
Description: An evil organization plots to bring several gangs together under their banner. Introduces a villain group I intend to use in future story arcs.
CR, As I mentioned in my tell, I ran "The Horseman Chronicles" last night. Once I get ready, would you like the review here or in my The Consequences or War thread?
The SOLUS Foundation - a Liberty and Pinnacle SG
"The Consequences of War" - Arcs # 227331 and 241496
End Games Final Moves #17006
By @Calash
Description: A madman bent on revenge against his sister has already begun his final dark plans. Can you find out his devious plot and stop it before its too late?
My rating: 3 stars
Time for my next review! Its a heroic, Lv40-54, 5-missions story arc. That means that it is, yet again, time to bust out Citizen Razor, my Lv50 Inv/Mace tanker. Warning: Story arc may contain Elite Bosses, Enemies with custom power selections. Well, thats not too bad. Im playing on CL 2.
The contact is a custom critter named Minkia. She seems to think Im cute. I preen a little bit. Names should be Names in the mission introduction. Minkia owes a favor to Susan Veil of DATA. Apparently Robert Veil, Susans brother, got a bit ticked off at Minkia when she borrowed (aka stole) some of his money. Susan saved Minkias life.
So now Minkia owes Susan, and needs my help to stop Robert from getting his revenge on Susan. Oh, and by the way, Robert blames Susan and somebody named Calash for his imprisonment at the hand of Crey. So Robert is all out for revenge, and Minkia needs a big, strong hunk of a hero like me to protect her. Will I do it?
Sure, I guess. But what if I had been paying a female toon? Then the dialogue would just be awkward. Unless maybe Minkia swings both ways. Hmmm ...
I accept the mission. Ah, Robert thinks that Minkia is dead, and this helps Minkia snoop around on Roberts computer. Roberts plan is called End Game. Well, thats mildly alarming. So Robert has sent some robots to attack a Crey facility and my task is to stop it. Umm, I dont like the Crey. Why should I stop the robots from attacking them? Cant I just sit back and bask in the glory of robots smacking Crey around for a little bit? Oh, Minkia says that the robot attack on Crey is very likely linked to his End Game and that I need to find a computer chip in the lead robot so she can hack into it and find more information about this End Game. Very well.
I check Minkias bio. It gives me some extra information. Robert is Dark Veil. After Dark Veil caught Minkia stealing money from him, he beat her nearly to death. Fortunately, somebody named Silver Dragon found her afterwards and saved her life. Im guessing this Silver Dragon is Calash. Minkia is an expert computer hacker. Theres a period missing at the end of the bio.
OK, with all of that said, its time to start this arc! I enter the mission and theres a lot of dialogue pop-up. Im guessing this is the Crey / Robots fight. I sit back and let the robots smack Crey around for a little bit. But alas, it seems as if Crey has won the fight. Im Lv50, so the Crey are those icky tank types. The objective is simple. Stop the Assault Bot and get the Memory Chip. While running around, a Crey says that four other facilities have been hit.
I skip the Crey tanks and go to the next floor, where a bunch of fighting is happening. I find a Crey / Robots battle. Ah, the robots are in a group called Dark Veil. I check their bios. RAM Series I has a typo in the bio. Sieges should be Sieges in the final sentence of the bio. Anyway, the robots are based on Siege, who is, if I remember right, the Praetorian version of Citadel. A quick visit to ParagonWiki confirms it. So if Dark Veil has access to Seiges technology, that means theyre from Praetoria. I wonder if this will pop up later down the road.
Alas, Ram Series II dies before I can check her bio. Im sure Ill be fighting them before too long, though, so Ill have time to check it. I skip all of the Crey and quickly find Assault Bot, which seems to be a boss from the Mastermind pet pool. Hes in the Robotics group. Id suggest the author change his group to Dark Veil for standardization since you can do that now with issue 15.
Anyway, the mission is quickly over. I check my clues. Dar should be Dark is in the Assault Bot clue. The only thing the clue says is that I have the computer chip and that it should reveal Dark Veils plans. Theres also another clue that I somehow missed, from a Crey group I had defeated earlier that had a sniper in it. The clue states that the robots are stealing specific things, including air pumps, duct work supplies, and high pressure biohazard containers. I wonder what Dark Veil needs all of those for.
Back to Minkia. She squeals in glee when she sees me and practically tries to jump my bones. Not now, dear, we have an End Game to prevent. Maybe later.
Mission #2 time. Alas, the highly-skilled computer hacker is not quite that good. A simple change in the encryption process and Minkia is stumped and cant even get past the first level of security. Im starting to suspect all of this is just an excuse for Minkia to seduce me. She tells me that she scavenged up some information from the Crey attacks. The robots stole air pumps, and biohazard containers. Hey wait, I already got that information! Unfortunately, Minkia has about as much clue as to why Dark Veil wants those items as I do, which is, nada.
The next step is clear. Get more information! And to do that, I need to do some breaking and entering. And Ill be breaking and entering the lab of ... Arachnos?!? Whoa, wait a minute! Oh, apparently they have a lab dedicated to decrypting transmission from Longbow, and the computers there can crack just about any ciphers. Well, OK, that makes sense. Minkia somehow got the password for one of the computers by seducing ANOTHER guy! One of the Arachnos guys, Im guessing, since the password is for the computer in the lab Im breaking into. Boy, she gets around. If I ever decide to go out with her, Im bringing along a bag full of strong antibiotics.
So, armed with the password, I head off to break into the Arachnos lab! The objective for this mission is to locate the correct terminal. The mission pop-up warns me that using the password on the wrong computer may set off an alarm. But how do I know which computer is the right one? HOW?!?!?!?
Trial and error, I guess. Very well.
I enter the mission, and even though I have yet to touch a single computer the Arachnos are all over me. At least smacking around Arachnos goons is a bit more fun that fighting Crey tanks, so I pause to enjoy the sight of mangled Arachnos bodies after Im done with them. I <3 ragdoll physics.
I see a few Arachnos computer clickies. Theyre named Computer 4 and Computer 3. My hunch tells me that theyre not the correct computers and that if I click on them, Ill have to deal with Arachnos ambushes, so I skip them. A bit further down, I see a second Computer 4. Definitely skipping that one. I also see a Computer 1. It might be the correct one. However, I see what looks like an elevator, so I decide to skip Computer 1 for now and explore the map a little more. Alas, I only find Computer 2 on the second floor. So I head back to the first floor and try my luck with Computer 1.
I chose correctly! It spawns an ambush. Since the ambush is a custom group, I decide to deal with them and read their bios. I see a Circuit robot that comes from, I believe, the Neuron faction of Praetorians. ParagonWiki proves me correct again. The bio of this Circuit robot is the same as the default bio. Suggestion: Use the new i15 tools to provide this critter with an updated bio tying it in with the Dark Veil group. But now theres a second Praetorian connection with Dark Veil. There are also Patrol MK-1 and Security MK-1 custom critters in the ambush.
Oh, I almost forgot. The information contained in the memory chip that I just decrypted mentions that the End Game is an airborne poison targeting a group called the Voxm. Never heard of them before. Theres also references to Susan Veil and Calash. OK, mission #2 over. Back to Minkia.
Ah, apparently the Voxm are some of Susans friends. Aight, if you say so. They are an alien race that have made their home in Paragon City. Robbies toxin will turn their natural scent into acid, which will slowly eat them from inside out. Yowch! Sounds painful. I suppose Ill have to do my heroic duty and prevent that from happening. But alas, Minkin is but a mere computer hacker. We need a geneticist! And just who is this geneticist?
Why, none other than Susan Veil herself! So I need to go to the Portal Corps facility in Califoria (which is misspelled Califorian here). No worries, theres a point-to-point portal just for me so that I dont have to fly all the way to California. I step into the green beam and am transported to California.
Mission #3. Hey, look, its the Portal Corps map! Im very familiar with it. When I arrive, I am greeted with alarm and the sound of gunfire. I dont think I arrived at a good time. Ill come back later. Nah, just kidding. The objective is to locate Susan Veil.
I open the door and see an odd group. The group is called Rift Invasion and I see a Frostling, a Tempest Elemental, an Energy Mage (I think this one is a Shadow Shard reflection and not the actual CoT mob) and Wisps. How ... odd. Thankfully, Dr. Susan Veil is right there in the front of the map.
Susan has an unnecessary quotation mark at the end of her captive dialogue. Anyway, I free her, and she informs me that there are four portal generators that have to be destroyed. Apparently the portal generators are bringing all of the creatures in Rift Invasion to this building. Susan seems to be a force field bubbler. I check her bio. Seems that when her brother went evil, this incident caused her to be fired from DATA. So now she works for Portal and is dedicated to protecting the heroes of Paragon City ... all the way from California? Well, whatever works, I guess. Shes in the Calash custom group. Thats odd, I thought Calash was an individual, not a group. Id make her group Portal Corps instead.
Well, I have four portal generators to destroy, so I go off and do just that. I lead poor Susan to her doom, then head to the bottom floor. On the second floor, I find a bunch of PPD fighting the Rift Invasion. What the PPD Paragon Police Department, in case you were wondering is doing in California is beyond me. At this point Id just suggest that the architect completely drop the reference to California and keep this mission in Paragon City. The reference to California is pointless.
At the bottom, I destroy all of the portal generators. Mission #3 over. Apparently after it was over, I visited Susan at the medbay and she looked at the data there. Thankfully, she can create an anti-toxin because Robbie used a sequence that he always used as a kid. Well, Im no geneticist, but if you say so. In any case, I now have the data to make a vaccine for Robbies toxin. I bring this to Minkia. She thinks she knows somebody who can make the vaccine.
So now I have the antitoxin. All I need to do is to introduce it to Robbies supply of toxins, and the problem is solved. Minkia hacked into Robbies system again (thanks to the decryption I got from Arachnos, Im guessing) and found where the stock of the toxin is. Its in some warehouse in Kings Row. Dark Veil plans on pumping the toxin in some caves under the warehouse.
The mission #4 introduction is missing a period at the end of the third paragraph.
Minkia tells me there are five containers of toxin I need to neutralize. By the way, this is the first paragraph of the send-off for mission #4:
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Here's what I found out. . There are five containers of toxin that you will have to inject the antidote into. This will destroy his supply of the poison..
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This needs to be cleaned up into:
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Here's what I found out. There are five containers of toxin that youll have to inject the antidote into. This will destroy his supply of the poison.
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Minkia also says that the warehouse will be guarded by a robot called Calash Mk-II, who Dark Veil created to discredit Calash. I have to take him out. Longbow will be there as well.
Mission #4 time. The objective is 5 Toxin Storage Units to locate (needs to remove a period from that), locate the MK-II android. The mission is full of Dark Veil robots, which is composed of a combination of custom critters and in-game robots such as the Neuron robots, the Hercules Titans, and a few others. At least this gives me the opportunity to read the custom bios.
Bio for Security MK-I:
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Slightly more intelligent than the battle droids it can summon the MK-1 can dispense low level programming as well as relay communication from higher level androids.
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Id change it into:
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Slightly more intelligent than the battle droids it summons, the MK-1 can dispense low level programming as well as relay communication from higher level androids.
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Bio for Patrol MK-I:
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An early design by the madman this series was replaced by the Security class android.
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Id change it into:
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An early design by the madman; this series was replaced by the Security class android.
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Bio for Security MK-III:
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A recent modification has added a distorted version of Susan Veils nano-healing system allowing the MK-III to perform instant repairs in battle.
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Veils should be Veils. This bio mentions that Dark Veil has been getting robots from other dimensions. That explains why some of the robots are Praetorian in origin and why the design of an earlier critter was based on Siege.
Anyway, back to the mission itself. I quickly find four of the toxin containers. I also find a Longbow ally, who is a force field / illusion controller. Now, normally Id ditch the ally, since Im a solo act. But its getting late, and theres a bunch of (optional) boss battles, so I decide to let the Longbow ally hang around to speed things up.
The Longbow ally and I quickly find Calash MK-II. Hes an EB. I didnt really pay attention to his powerset. I think I saw energy blasts. Calash MK-IIs enemy spotted dialogue is missing a period at the end. We make quick work of Calash MK-II, but theres one more toxin storage unit to find.
Once again its a game of find the last clickie that I enjoy so much. After looking all over the warehouse, I finally find the last toxin. The mission is over. The mission end clue states that Dark Veil had anticipated my arrival and had kept some toxin as back-up. He can teleport those toxin into the caves anyway. Well, if he had the technology to do that, why didnt he do that in the first place? Why wait until after I bust up the lab?
End of mission clue:
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In the event this facility would be shut down he was prepared to ship the remaining toxin to an off-shore lab that he had installed several teleport devices.
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Id change it into:
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In the event this facility is shut down he was prepared to ship the remaining toxin to an off-shore lab where he had installed several teleport devices.
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Back to Minkia. She said she expected something like that, and that I need to hurry up and get the last of the toxin before it kills the poor Voxm.
And now its Mission #5. The end is in sight. Minkia intercepted a message from Dark Veil to a freighter to pick up the last of the toxin. Umm, why doesnt Dark Veil simply teleport it to the caves instead of waiting for the freighter? In any case, its a timed mission and I have an hour to do this.
The send-off tells me that my main goal is to take out Dark Veil. Calash MK-II never arrived at the Zig, so hes probably with Dark Veil. But on the bright side, Ill have the original Calash there to help me.
The final mission. Im in Dark Veils secret lab. The objective is simple. Defeat Dark Veil. Well, shouldnt I also neutralize the remaining toxin? What if some random villain happens to wander by and find the lab and the remaining toxin? Then the villain could kill the Voxm too!
In any case, I find Calash soon enough. Hes an Elite Boss. Well, thatll certainly make the final battles a bit easy. Id probably lower him to a Boss. I distract Calash with some robots and leave him behind.
I run into Calashs evil brother. Hes not listed as an objective. Id suggest adding him as an optional objective. Yeah, Minkia did tell you about him, but if youre on a team you might not be privy to that information. This time Im all alone. No Longbow to help me! And hes spawned as a +1 EB too. Lets see how this goes. At least now I get to see what his powerset is. He seems to be a Fire Shield / Super Strength tanker. He also mentions that not even Calash can help me. Well, thats good, because Calash is not with me anyway. At the halfway point, theres an ambush, which isnt really that big a deal except theres a new mob in the bunch, a healing drone. I focus on the healing drone until its defeated, then its back to Calash MK-II. All the new robots do is boost my ToHit buff. Calash MK-II goes down.
Now its time for the final battle. Its time for ... Dark Veil!
And there he is! Hes surrounded by Dark Veils Personal Guard. Veils should be Veils. Hes an Elite Boss. I read his bio. His bio says his world was shattered when he was blamed for the kidnapping of Calash. So did Dark Veil actually kidnap Calash, or was he framed?
OK, its time for the battle. I take out the healing drones first. Dark Veil is ... surprise, surprise ... a Robotics / Force Field mastermind. He calls in an ambush at 75% and 50%. Its not hard to bring him down, just tedious. Whenever the ambush comes, I just take care of the healing drones, and then return to Dark Veil. Eventually I take him down. Just when I think the mission is over ... blammo! Theres three escape drones! I have to prevent them from escaping!
The three escape drones are all Security MK-III bosses that run away when they reach 10% of their HP. Thankfully my tanker has the Nemesis Staff, so I have some ranged attacks. Theyre carrying boxes, so theyre easy to recognize. One spawns right next to an elevator and I just barely prevent it from escaping.
Unfortunately, I cant find the last drone. Even though Ive cleared the map, and looked all over the map from top to bottom five times, the last escape drone is nowhere in sight. The mission fails. The toxin escapes, and the poor Voxm are slaughtered. Well, no theyre not. They merely have to relocate, and Susan will have to work on something to clean their caves. Minkie is disappointed in me, and I dont even get any pity sex afterwards. Honestly, at this point, I dont even care. Ive already spent 3 and a half hours on this story arc.
Mission #5 Mission Failed wrap-ups first paragraph needs a space between the first two sentences. Third paragraph is missing a period at the end. Also, theres an extra period at the beginning of the final paragraph.
Final Summary: Ive already spent a ton of time on this arc, so Ill make this short and sweet. The story itself is average. There are a lot of minor typos, mostly concerning punctuation. The custom critters were OK, but more details need to be added to explain why all the in-game critters were now a part of Dark Veil. Yes, its a lot of work for something that only a few folks will even care about, but if the architect is going to submit his story arc for review, thats the kind of details hell have to work on. When I saw Calash in the first mission introduction, I was a bit worried that Id be in a Mary Sue story, but the architect thankfully avoids that for the most part. Still, there are some aspects of the story that probably could be dropped, especially the whole Susan is in California part.
TL;DR version: This story arc is decent but needs a lot of polish.
Play my MA arcs!
Tracking Down Jack Ketch - ArcID #2701
Cat War! - ArcID #2788
Tomorrow (Tuesday) I work until 9pm, so I won't be reviewing anything then.
The queue is in the order that I received them, but is probably not going to be in the order that I play them.
#219484 The History of Statesman by jjac
#246604 Quatrexin's Quandary by Displaced
#3369 Matchstick Women by Bubbawheat
#178774 Tales of Croatoa by Hercules
#114284 Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friend by FredrikSvanberg
#4727 Future Skulls by Justice Blues
#70801 Simple Times by Justice Blues
#255895 Future's End by Justice Blues
#227331 The Consequences of War - Part 1 by Dalghyrn
#241496 The Consequences of War - Part 2 by Dalghyrn
#227436 Halloween Night by BinkDeBook
#77311 The Ballad of Murky The Cat by BinkDeBook
#3463 Marked Man by Zikar
#250480 BE Prologue: Gangs United by Ozzie Arcane
Play my MA arcs!
Tracking Down Jack Ketch - ArcID #2701
Cat War! - ArcID #2788
Part 1 *and* Part 2? While I wish every reviewer would be able to make the time to run both arcs for perspective's sake, that's biting off a crit of nearly task force proportions -- and I appreciate it.
Like I've said, I already have notes ready to write up for The Horsemen Chronicles. I'll add The Wolfpack Chronicles to my list.
The SOLUS Foundation - a Liberty and Pinnacle SG
"The Consequences of War" - Arcs # 227331 and 241496
Thank you for the thorough review and honest feedback. I enjoyed it very much, especially the humor. In the end it is a really well done review that gives me some good points to go back and tweak my story.
I do apologize for you not being able to complete the mission. When I first put the mission together it had a spawning problem but I was able to switch maps and it fixed the problem pre-I15. I will run some more testing and see if I need to make an adjustment on the spawning numbers.
Some comments on the points you made:
Minkia and her dialog: When I first wrote it up I had similar concerns as you did with gender and the tone of the flirting text. I ended up keeping the text to stay true to the character design. It also adds a bit of humor to the arc.
Mission 1 has a fatal flaw that I am still trying to balance out. The Crey tend to win every time in the Crey vs Veil Robot battles. Earlier designs had patrols roaming the halls as well but you can not set a battle group as Rogue so the robots would end up fighting each other and breaking the immersion.. I am hesitant on including buffing mobs that early in the arc as they have the potential of being overpowered.
Mission 2 sounds like it has a slight bug. All the computer names should be the same. The way to tell the terminals is not mentioned but came as an idea from another review. The interaction text that shows in the combat logs will tell you if you have the right terminal or not.
Ah
Mission 3, how you vex me so. If I have any question for you it is this:
Would the arc rate better if mission 3 was not there?
It is designed to be a plot device and introduce the other major player in the game, Susan Veil. It is also there to break up the missions a bit and give the feeling that there is more than just your little quest going on in the world.
Honestly based on the reviews I think it fails at all of these and ends up making the arc drag on rather than move at a good pace. My thought is to remove it totally and introduce Susan in Mission 2, having her following a similar lead and ending up at the same base as you are.
I will work on cleaning up the typos as well. Thank you again for the review.
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Tomorrow (Tuesday) I work until 9pm, so I won't be reviewing anything then.
The queue is in the order that I received them, but is probably not going to be in the order that I play them.
#219484 The History of Statesman by jjac
#246604 Quatrexin's Quandary by Displaced
#3369 Matchstick Women by Bubbawheat
#178774 Tales of Croatoa by Hercules
#114284 Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friend by FredrikSvanberg
#4727 Future Skulls by Justice Blues
#70801 Simple Times by Justice Blues
#255895 Future's End by Justice Blues
#227331 The Consequences of War - Part 1 by Dalghyrn
#241496 The Consequences of War - Part 2 by Dalghyrn
#227436 Halloween Night by BinkDeBook
#77311 The Ballad of Murky The Cat by BinkDeBook
#3463 Marked Man by Zikar
#250480 BE Prologue: Gangs United by Ozzie Arcane
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I am currently in the process of re-writing much of my second arc, (to improve it I hope. 
) so you may want to move at least it and the last one down on your actual playing list. The changes should be up in the next day or two, depending on how my testing goes.
This shows the problem with getting reviews. People give you feedback and you end making changes to make things better. 
Justice Blues, Tech/Tank, Inv/SS
----------------------
Fighting The Future Trilogy
----------------------
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Part 1 *and* Part 2? While I wish every reviewer would be able to make the time to run both arcs for perspective's sake, that's biting off a crit of nearly task force proportions -- and I appreciate it.
Like I've said, I already have notes ready to write up for The Horsemen Chronicles. I'll add The Wolfpack Chronicles to my list.
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I'll probably not do Parts 1 and 2 back-to-back. Apparently if you rate two different missions within a period of time, you only get tickets for the first mission that was rated. I played one of Wrong Number's arcs and rated it. Then I played another one the next day, and she didn't get any tickets from the second mission.
So I'll probably do Part 1, then Part 2 a few days later.
Play my MA arcs!
Tracking Down Jack Ketch - ArcID #2701
Cat War! - ArcID #2788
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Ah
Mission 3, how you vex me so. If I have any question for you it is this:
Would the arc rate better if mission 3 was not there?
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Hmm. That's a good question. Removing Mission #3 would certainly help the story flow a lot better, as all you really need is a comment from Minkia, something like "I'll call up Susan and see if she has any ideas. Come back later." Something like that would take care of the entire mission.
But would that be enough to improve the rating. I think it'd need something more -- a better explanation for why Dark Veil doesn't simply teleport the toxin into the caverns, for starters -- along with some more polishing of the details in order to get a higher rating. It doesn't need an overhaul, merely some tweaking here and there.
Play my MA arcs!
Tracking Down Jack Ketch - ArcID #2701
Cat War! - ArcID #2788
[ QUOTE ]
I am currently in the process of re-writing much of my second arc, (to improve it I hope. ) so you may want to move at least it and the last one down on your actual playing list. The changes should be up in the next day or two, depending on how my testing goes.
This shows the problem with getting reviews. People give you feedback and you end making changes to make things better.
[/ QUOTE ]
No worries. As with the "Consequences of War" story, I'll probably be playing parts 1, 2, and 3 several days apart to ensure I judge each arc on its own merits and to make sure you get the full rewards.
Play my MA arcs!
Tracking Down Jack Ketch - ArcID #2701
Cat War! - ArcID #2788
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I'll probably not do Parts 1 and 2 back-to-back. Apparently if you rate two different missions within a period of time, you only get tickets for the first mission that was rated. I played one of Wrong Number's arcs and rated it. Then I played another one the next day, and she didn't get any tickets from the second mission.
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Like I'm going to complain? While I've done my best to write them so they are distinct arcs that don't necessarily have to be run together, the chance to have a reviewer run them both and offer a big picture perspective is great.
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This shows the problem with getting reviews. People give you feedback and you end making changes to make things better.
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It's not the change-making that's the problem, it's the stuff you miss that's linked to the changes you made that's the problem. I've screamed out loud several times and prayed quite fervently that no one's run one of my arcs after finding mistakes resulting from changes that required dialogue corrections I'd missed, and so on.
It's one of the prices of being anal retentive about such things, I guess. Then again, by the time some of these reviewers get hold of you, you become anal retentive about such things as a survival mechanism.
The SOLUS Foundation - a Liberty and Pinnacle SG
"The Consequences of War" - Arcs # 227331 and 241496
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Ah
Mission 3, how you vex me so. If I have any question for you it is this:
Would the arc rate better if mission 3 was not there?
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Hmm. That's a good question. Removing Mission #3 would certainly help the story flow a lot better, as all you really need is a comment from Minkia, something like "I'll call up Susan and see if she has any ideas. Come back later." Something like that would take care of the entire mission.
But would that be enough to improve the rating. I think it'd need something more -- a better explanation for why Dark Veil doesn't simply teleport the toxin into the caverns, for starters -- along with some more polishing of the details in order to get a higher rating. It doesn't need an overhaul, merely some tweaking here and there.
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Thank you so much for the feedback Like any writer/architect it is easy to get lost in your personal vision and not quite grasp how it will be viewed from the outside.
I am thinking of the following changes at this point.
Drop mission 3. This will give me the space to flesh out the bios of the various mobs. I will have Susan show up in mission 2 as she was trying to follow a similar lead as you but got captured by arachnos.
Better explanation of why he does not just teleport the toxin to begin with. With mission 3 out of the way I will have plenty of text space to cover this. Basically it is due to money issues but I never touch on that in the story.
And some typo errors that I will clean up as well
Thanks again for taking a look.
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I am currently in the process of re-writing much of my second arc, (to improve it I hope. ) so you may want to move at least it and the last one down on your actual playing list. The changes should be up in the next day or two, depending on how my testing goes.
This shows the problem with getting reviews. People give you feedback and you end making changes to make things better.
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No worries. As with the "Consequences of War" story, I'll probably be playing parts 1, 2, and 3 several days apart to ensure I judge each arc on its own merits and to make sure you get the full rewards.
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Turned out that getting the changes into the the second arc was not as time consuming as I feared. Unfortunately, with the massive changes I made, I just know that Dalghryn is correct and I missed something somewhere that is now totally nonsensical. Just testing the arc showed me a few things, and one thing I know about being a writer, you never, ever, find all of your own tyops. 
Justice Blues, Tech/Tank, Inv/SS
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Fighting The Future Trilogy
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The History of Statesman #219484
By @jjac
Description: Rediscover this legend of the Old World and journey through the forgotten past alongside the 28th centurys favorite robot historian, THE TIEM MASHEEN!
My rating: 5 stars
This is a mission Ive been meaning to play for a while. I played through the architects A Tangle in Time arc earlier and enjoyed it. This is supposed to be a comedy arc.
The level range is 40-50, but the first mission is set to 1-54. Id suggest the architect fix the level range of that mission so that its standardized with the other missions. Its 4 missions long and heroic. No warning. I decide to fire up Citizen Razor, my Lv50 inv/mace tanker. The challenge level is set to 2.
The contact is Nemesis! Oh noes, did I get involved in yet another Nemesis plot?!? Oh, hes called THE TIEM MASHEEN. The description says that its a rusty old Nemesis robot thats been reprogrammed.
The mission heading is dark purple, which is hard to read. Id suggest lightening it up so that its a bit easier to read. I guess the robot is from the Naruto B. Vanderhuge Museum of World History. I know absolutely nothing about Naruto. Anyway, this time machine is programmed to show me the life of Statesman, and well start by looking at Baby Statesman spelunking the magical caves of ancient Rome in search for the Well of Furries. Thats either a typo, or Ill be running into a ton of catgirls and wolfboys.
I exclaim What, Wait a... and apparently the robot think thats my name. Cute. The robot instructs me to check all of the clues and info boxes, as this is a history lesson.
The mission objective is to find Baby Statesman. And apparently somebody wants me to access a data node as well. The custom critters all look like that guy from God of War. The bio says that all Roman soldiers are required to be called Spartacus. I see.
I find a data note and access it. Its a note from Mender Lazarus of Ouroboros. It tells me that although Im wondering why Im on a field trip 700 years in the future, I should just play along and keep the network distracted.
I find Statesman, who is a reskinned Baby New Year. The bio says that his name was believed to be Jak Emret of the Rikti, who are now extinct. I free him, and now the objective is to defend the Well of Furries. I quickly find it and its a trash can. I defend it and notice that my HP is dropping quickly. Oops I forgot to turn on my toggles. Doh. I turn them on, and take care of business. Mission over.
When I leave the mission, Lazarus hijacks the machine and tells me that as long as we work together, well be out of here in no time. I talk to the robot, and it tells me that Statesman got powers of various beasts, but his face was disfigured so thats why he wore the mask.
The second mission informs me that Statesman built the pyramids and killed all of the sabre-toothed tigers. But now I will go to World War Second and prevent a great dictator from using the power of the pyramids for nefarious deeds. I ponder if there will be giant shapeshifting robots as I accept the mission.
In any case, I get to watch as Statesman defeat the evil Axel powers. The mission objective is to find Statesman and to find the scouting subroutine. There seems to be two stories going on here: The humorous take on Statesmans life story, and something involving Mender Lazarus.
I find the subroutine. Its guarded by what seems to be a bunch of Mega Man clones. I destroy it. The clue tells me that Mender Lazarus really, really hates horribly inaccurate retellings of history. I assume Lazarus wants me to correct this.
The map is also surrounded by Wolf Pack sub-marines and 5th Council Vampyris custom critters. Obviously mocking the 5th Column / Councils obsession with werewolves and vampires. The bios mention that the vampires and werewolves have a symbiotic relationship. The vampires feed on the wolves blood, and in turn the vampires protect the wolves eggs. Well, thats certainly ... interesting.
I quickly find Statesman of the Freedum Falanks. He informs me that the Great Dictator is gathering powers from his pyramids. The objective is now to defeat the Great Dictator and to destroy three obelisks.
I find an Egyptian obelisk, and it looks suspiciously like a Rikti machine. It also mentions that the Great Dictator is Chaplene. Uh oh. I remember him. He was one mean bastich. Lets go and win World War Second, Statesman!
Charles Chaplene is right around the corner. I help Statesman save World War Second! Chaplenes bio states that his sanity was shattered by his failure as an actor. I make him a failure as a great dictator as well.
Oh, theres also a non-required objective, a boss by the name of Noseferatoo. His bio has a dig on organized religion, which automatically grants this arc an additional star.
Theres another non-required boss named Lesser Dictator. I think its a homage to M. Bison of Street Fighter II fame. Theres a few of those Lesser Dictators around. I destroy the last two Egyptian obelisks and the mission is over.
I read the clues. Apparently the real Statesman disappeared around 2012 in Detroit. Figures. Nothing good ever happens in Detroit. I should know, I used to live an hour north of it. Ill just blame the Detroit Lions and move on. Anyway, when Statesman and most of the Freedom Phalanx disappeared, all of the big baddies (Recluse, Nemesis, Rikti, Council, Circle of Thorn, Devouring Earth, etc.) started wrestling each other for power and essentially nullified each other within 50 years. Thats nice, I guess, but man, 2012-2062 mustve been a hellish period to live through.
The 3rd and 4th clues should be Mender Lazarus 3rd (or 4th) Transmission" for consistencys sake. Unless this is deliberate.
I exit the mission, and the machine greets me with a bunch of baseball metaphors. Apparently V-Day happened on February 14, 1946, because it happened on Valentines Day.
Mission #3 informs me that on October 28, 2005 (the release day of City of Villains, in case you were wondering the significance of that date), Statesman meets his arch-villain ... a terrifying tyrant who weaves his wicked web and waits for the innocent to fall prey to his mutilating mandibles. Hmm, I wonder just who this arch-villain is.
I accept the mission. Yep, you guessed it. I have to go and fight Lawd Nemesis! I go off into SPACE! I enter the space lab and I have to fight a bunch of Gewher Jaguars. They look like a mutilated version of robots with jaguar legs. Theres also a Lancer Surgeon who is ... well ... hes dressed in doctor overalls. Because hes a surgeon. Get it?
The objective is to, yet again, find Statesman. There are also 3 security protocols to destroy. I find one of the security protocols and its guarded by the same Mega Man clones that were protecting the subroutine in Mission #2.
Along the way, I find Manticore. Well, lets just say that the historians got their information a tad bit wrong. I free him, and he runs away as hes afraid of heights. I'm not sure how wise it is for a guy who is afraid of heights to go running around and exiting space stations, but hey, I'm not the one in a robotic body suit.
I find Statesman. He is Statesman, hero of America. He asks me if I saw Manticore, his side-kick. Err ... yeah I did. He's currently floating right by the space station window. But nevermind him. I get a 5th clue upon freeing Statesman that basically says wotta morons those 28th century folks are. The first objective is now Defeat Lawd Nemesis.
I destroy the last security protocol and find Lawd Nemesis, who is really Lord Recluse and is classified an Arch-Villain. I think its the version from the Mender Silos TF, though. Theres a boss called War-Hulk in the group. It is theorized that he was built using vacuum tubes and a *lot* of gamma radiation.
Oddly enough, I dont fight Lawd Nemesis. He says I cant put him away for good, as I have to think about the franchise. Guys got a point. I let him run away. The sixth clue tells me that the world has been devolving into a bunch of morons as people rely more on citations from movies and video games instead of history books and museums. I wonder if this is a subtle dig on AE farms or if Im reading too much into it. Mission over. The pop-up message tells me that I can finally meet Lazarus face-to-face.
Mission #4 tells me that I need to scour Lawd Nemesis wrecked spaceship for ... wreckage! Very well. I accept the mission and it looks as if Mender Lazarus is already in trouble. Off to save the day (millennia?) I go!
The objective is to save Mender Lazarus! Theres a bunch of Mega Man clones here and some weird green-skinned Mainframe Guardian thingy. Im not sure what, if any, game this is from.
I see Mender Lazarus being held by those Network Guardians and Mainframe Guardians. However, I am distracted by a shiny piece of land so I click on it. It takes forever to finish, and when it does Lazarus cries that he needs my help and I should leave the glowies alone. Heh. What makes this even more amusing is that I am literally right next to Mender Lazarus when this is happening. Guess I better go and free him.
I do so, and the objective changes so that I have to shut down THE TIEM MASHEEN and destroy three data banks. This is an outdoors map, but the architect has thoughtfully made the objectives very easy to find by giving the mobs an animation I dont know what its called, but I think its the Captive Energy Field one that makes them shoot out bright blue light fields. This is a small touch that is much appreciated and really cuts down on any potential frustration.
In any case, I find THE TIEM MASHEEN. And its a (Fake) Nemesis Plot after all! It has decided that after 700 years, its time to take over the world. But its also lonely as it hasnt seen any of its compatriots in seven centuries not since the war. Too bad for it. I turn THE TIEM MASHEEN into scrap metal. Lazarus is pleased, and he can now turn his efforts into correcting the written history ... by copying articles off Wikipedia. Go figure. He asks me if I want to do this again next week, as he wants to tackle the Pyramids of Gaza even though the Rikti doesnt agree with me. Yeah, I think Ill pass on that adventure.
I exit the mission. THE TIEM MASHEEN is still there, but its lifeless. The exit dialogue comes from Mender Lazarus, and its the exact same thing as the 8th clue. Id suggest completely dropping the 8th clue to avoid the repetition. In any case, the arc is now over.
Final Summary: This was a very well-done story arc. The Lawd Nemesis group was clever and well-designed. I didnt see any typos. (Doesnt mean there werent any, just that I didnt notice them.) The story was amusing, and the internal story-logic was consistent. I enjoyed seeing the twisted history of Statesman. There was an A-Story (the inaccurate history of Statesman) and a B-Story (the Mender Lazarus part), something that can be difficult to pull off given the limitations of AE, but the architect managed to pull it off very well. I also really appreciated the little touches and details that were put into this story arc, such as all of the animations making it very easy to find the objectives, and all of the custom bios.
The only flaws that I saw were that the clue titles were not consistent, and that the final summary repeated the same thing that was in the 8th clue. I'd also lighten up the dark purple coloring of the mission titles, and set the level range of the first mission to 40-50. Those, however, are pretty minor flaws and doesnt detract from the overall storyline nor the final rating.
Play my MA arcs!
Tracking Down Jack Ketch - ArcID #2701
Cat War! - ArcID #2788
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It's not the change-making that's the problem, it's the stuff you miss that's linked to the changes you made that's the problem. I've screamed out loud several times and prayed quite fervently that no one's run one of my arcs after finding mistakes resulting from changes that required dialogue corrections I'd missed, and so on.
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Oh yeah, I'm well aware of that. There's problems with part A, so you change it to make the story better, but you forget to look at the big picture so suddenly the details in part A contradicts or doesn't make sense when you take part B into account. D'oh!
Happened to me many times. That's why they recommend you run through your entire arc again after making any major changes and making sure that everything still hangs together well.
Play my MA arcs!
Tracking Down Jack Ketch - ArcID #2701
Cat War! - ArcID #2788
Hey Citizen_Razor! I'd appreciate it if you'd play my new arc! I'm tired of the Family getting shafted when it comes to content!
Arc Title: The Superadine Revolution
Arc ID#: 262739
Description: No longer content just to push Superadine and commit petty crimes, the Skulls are attempting to steal control of the entire Superadine operation from the leaders of the Family. The combination of the dark magic of the Skulls and the pure strain of Superadine would make them incredibly powerful...
Author: @SpaceNut
Alignment: Heroic, levels 20-29
Length: Approx 1 hour (5 missions)
Difficulty Level: Moderate (Elite bosses in 2 missions, but otherwise soloable)
Enemies: Family, "Skulls"
...I forgot what experience means.
Hey, I wanted to say thanks for all the detailed input you gave in your review of my arc.
At the time I first read it, I was a bit disappointed, as I had hoped that you would like it better.
I have been doing lots of revising on my arc based on feedback from reviewers, so I re-read your review and I wanted to say not only was it useful, but extremely funny. Oddly your review has the same type of humor I attempted to infuse into may arc.
I have a question for you. I received some input from several who have played the arc, that it would be more fun if the same villian group wasn't the main feature of all 5 missions. So here goes the question. You said: "The warning states that the story arc may contain: Elite Bosses, Extreme Elite Bosses, Extreme Bosses, and Extreme Lieutenants! I gulp, but I go ahead and accept the mission. I am playing this on CL 2, so the bosses will be bosses and the EBs will be EBs. Sounds like fun."
I am not quite sure if this was purely sarcastic or if you enjoy a challenge.....But I am considering changing my main villian group for my future mission. I may create a mixture of non-custom villians, or if that can't fit, use a non-costum group.
Do you have any types you enjoy fighting, or you think would make sense for a leap into the future.
Thanks
@Gypsy Rose
In Pursuit of Liberty - 344916
The Vigilante - 395861
Suppression - 374481 - Winner of The American Legion's February 2011 AE Author Contest
Mecha Mutiny: Quatrexins Quandary #246604
By @Feizel
Description: Robot Madness!! You like robots!? Youve come to the right place!
My rating: 3 stars
There's a typo right there in the description. robot's should be robots.
The description notes that the arc is intended to be a fun way to get XP from Lv22 to 33. Unfortunately I dont have any villains in that range. I have 2 50s, and everybody else is under Lv20. So for this story arc, I decide to break out my favorite villain, the dreaded serial killer Jack Ketch! Hes an Lv50 Ninja Blades /Super Reflexes Stalker. The warning states that the story arc may contain Elite Bosses and higher level villains appearing at a level lower than design intent. There are five missions, and I note that the enemy groups are Psychic Clockwork robots and a custom group. My stalker kills things fast, but doesnt fare well in large groups, so I am setting this to Challenge Level 3. Ill be facing +1 and +2 mobs, and the bosses will be bosses and the Elite Bosses will be Elite Bosses.
The contact is Dr. Quatrexin. I confess; Ive never done the Black Scorpion patron arc. I hope that doesnt affect my enjoyment of this arc.
Seems that a bunch of robots suddenly went missing, including a special project that Dr. Quatrexin was working on for Arachnos called Edison. While Vanguard is dealing with most of the situation, Lord Recluse wants to keep the Edison project under wraps.
In the first paragraph, Dont should not be capitalized. Also in the first paragraph, way should be wake.
After I accept the mission, and Dr. Quatrexin tells me that he has a warehouse for me to check out. Vanguard will be checking it out. If I hurry, I can beat them there. But if I happen to run into any Vanguard guards, I should either avoid them or kill them. Guess which one Ill be doing.
The second paragraph in the send-off has a sentence that has too many periods.
I enter the mission. The objective is to defeat a Clockwork boss and to defeat a Vanguard boss. Wait, I thought I was supposed to avoid Vanguard.
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[NPC] Vanguard Commando: I don't see any of our robots
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This line is missing a period at the end.
I see a Vanguard Unit Leader. However, hes placed in the Crey group. I dont know if this is a bug or an oversight. In any case, I take care of him without too much trouble. The custom group seems to be another version of Vanguard. One of the mobs in the custom Vanguard is actually a Crey Tank, complete with the Crey bio and description. Might want to change that. Theres also a reskinned Bane Spider Commando called Vanguard Commando that has the Arachnos bio / description.
In any case, I quickly find the Clockwork boss, who is called TaRaach. That doesnt sound like a Clockwork name to me. More like Rikti, really. Clockwork bosses are named things like Gearshift, Bolts, Powderkeg, or Hinge. Basically, after mechanical things. In any case, I apply my can-opener to TaRaach and the mission is over. The clue tells me that Vanguard thinks that the Clockwork King is behind the missing robots. How I got that information from one of Taraachs (thats what it says in the clue) gears, I dont know, but I did.
I head back to Dr. Quatrexin. He says that it makes sense that Vanguard is investigating Clockwork. I move on to Mission #2. Dr. Quatrexin tells me that although they know very little about the Clockwork King, Arachnos has had some dealing with a particular Clockwork called Clockwork Maiden. Dr. Quatrexin suspects this Clockwork Maiden of raising ruckus and spying on Arachnos. He does not think it bodes well for his Edison project. So I have to go over to Maidens lair and find out whats going on.
The mission objective tells me to search for clues and defeat Clockwork Maiden. But what if shes innocent? Oh, like I care? Just point me towards the robots to destroy. There are various robots in a group called Royal Subjects. Rikti Drones, Council hoverbots, Council mech men, a Praetorian Clockwork, Arachnos drones, etc. I see a custom critter called Gadget. All of the robots still retain their original bios.
It doesnt take me too long to find the Clockwork Maiden. I read her bio. Seems Dr. Quatrexin was right. She was indeed a spy for the Clockwork King, who wants to expand his reach in the Rogue Isles. Rogue Isles should be capitalized in the bio.
During my battle with the Maiden, she informs me that the servants have taken to the streets. Im guessing thats not a good thing. I add the Maidens golden skull to my ever-growing pile of souvenirs. By the way, there seems to be some extra spaces at the beginning of Clockwork Maidens battle begin dialogue. It looked like this, with five spaces between the colon and the line of dialogue (typically there is only one):
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[NPC] Clockwork Maiden: Jack Ketch you are too late! As you perish here the servants take to the streets!
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I then find the clue, which is just around the corner. Its a transmitter and I shut it down. The clue says Psychic waves. Does that make any sense? Better see what the Doctor makes of it. What, the fact that the clockwork belong to a faction called Psychic Clockwork was not clue enough for me?
Findind should be Finding in the Mission #2 end pop-up. I am to report my finding to Dr. Quatrexin. I do so. Dr. Quatrexin passes the buck onto Dr. Aeon. The slacker!
Surprise, surprise, the robots are revolting. Its almost as if Im playing Mega Man X again. Dr. Aeon determined that the transmitter was sending out digitally formatted psychic waves, essentially spreading the Clockwork Kings powers to all machines instead of just to his Clockwork robots. Dr. Quatrexin found six of those within a half kilometer area. He thinks there must be thousands of them in the greater Paragon-RI area. Well, thats great, isnt it? Let the Clockwork King rampage all over Paragon City while I sit back and enjoy the chaos. Ill come back later and reap the rewards.
Oh, right, Dr. Quatrexin wants me to stop the rampage so that I can save his precious Edison. The paycheck better be worth giving up a chance to see Paragon City being overrun by rampaging robots.
Dr. Quatrexin wishes me luck, and tells me to not sweat the Vanguard, as they still dont realize it was us at the warehouse. Except I had to go out and defeat one of the Vanguard Units, thereby bringing attention to myself. Vanguard most definitely does KNOW I was at the warehouse.
I enter the mission. The objective is to deactivate six transmitters. A Vanguard guard tells me to steer clear of the Royal Guard if I see them. As if! If I see them, they are SO seeing the business end of my katana. Anyway, its off to find those six transmitters.
I find a transmitter and shut it down. Transmissions should be capitalized in the objective done system message. Also there should be a period at the end of both the beginning objective and ending objective sentences.
Ohh I see the Royal Guard. They are a couple of Longbow Heavy +1 Elite Bosses. Hmm ... I try my luck. They kill me, but I have one nearly down. I hit the hospital and buy some more inspirations. The worst part is that Im Lv33 so I lost my access to Elude. If I had Elude, I wouldve been able to take care of them no problem. When I return, I take down the Longbow mech with a well-timed Assassin Strike. Now its on to the Vanguard Heavy. Without his brother, hes considerably easier to take down. Pfft, so much for the Royal Guard.
I find another Royal Guard patrol, but since Ive already proven my point I fly around trying to find the last few transmitters. I find them in short order, and the mission is over. Dr. Quatrexin tells me that shutting down the six transmitters didnt do much good. Well, duh, not with the thousands and thousands of transmitters still out there. Dr. Quatrexin thinks he has another way, though.
Dr. Quatrexin informs me that Dr. Aeon has an extra powerful sub-sonic pulse emitter. Maybe we can use it to take out the psychic core of the transmitters? Well, its worth a try. Anything for your precious Edison, Dr. Quatrexin.
Unfortunately, Dr. Aeons lab is overrun. For some weird reason Im not shocked at all. Dr. Quatrexin tells me to hurry up, and yet again cautions me to avoid the Royal Guard.
The mission pop-up says Lets hope Dr. Aeons plan will work. It should be Lets hope Dr. Aeons plan will work. But wait, what plan? I thought Dr. Quatrexin came up with the plan himself and that they had lost communication with Dr. Aeon. The objective is to initiate the pulse and save Dr. Aeon.
I quickly find Dr. Aeon and save him. I then leave him behind to play with the robots. I find two more Royal Guards and dispatch of them. I then press Dr. Aeons red button, which, I assume, emits the sub-sonic pulse. Mission over. Time to go and see if it worked. Considering that its Mission #4 out of #5, Im guessing it didnt.
The mission exit pop-up informs me that it didnt. But wait! Dr. Quatrexin informs me that the pulse knocked out all of the transmitters except for one, and that the robots are returning to normal. So did it work or not?
However, there is still one transmitter left. And its mobile. Are they moving it, or is it something far, far worse?
Oh NO! Its a NEMESIS PLOT! Will I never escape that cursed Assyrian?
Nah, its not that. Rather, the Clockwork King implanted the last transmitter in Edison Prime. So now I hafta destroy the thing that I was sent to out. I think I see my paycheck vaporizing. I turn around and tell Dr. Quatrexin to take care of his own problems himself. Well, no I didnt, but only for the sake of this review.
Edison Prime is at Striga Island. I head over there. The objective is, obviously, to defeat Edison Prime. Ya know, why do I need to destroy Edison Prime? Cant I merely shut him down, unscrew his plate, and get the last transmitter? Then the robot would still be intact.
Actually, ya know, never mind that. Destroying Edison Prime sounds more fun, and honestly, who cares about Arachnos? Ive already kicked Lord Recluses future butt around a ruined version of Atlas Park. Arachnos can kiss my butt!
Its the Council map with the gigantic Mech Man. Unfortunately, Edison Prime is *not* the Mech Man. He, however, is trying to capture the Mech Man for the Clockwork King. Edison Prime is an Elite Boss. His bio says that he was designed to be the ultimate robot warrior for Lord Recluse.
Edison Prime informs me that Im a human weakling. I might be human, but I still plan on taking his shiny read skull anyway. Ive always wanted a shiny red toilet seat. Unfortunately, I didnt have enough inspirations, and the annoying pop-up guns keep on knocking me out of hide, so I am defeated. No worries. I stock up on inspiration and come back.
In a curious twist, just as I am on the way to transform Edison Prime into a piece of furniture, the mission suddenly completes. Im guessing that Edison Prime fell into the lava and it killed him. I am kinda bummed, but eh whatever. Thatll make for one uncomfortable toilet seat.
I go back to Dr. Quartexin, and hes all like Yay! Thankfully I get paid after all. I add Dr. Quartexin to my list of future victims. And this arc is over.
Final Summary: This was just an okay story. It seems as if the primary point of this story was for the architect to beat up on a lot of robots and get his toons to Lv33. Whats so special about Lv33, Im not sure. Personally Id probably try to level up to 35 instead, but there may be a bug associated with it that Im not familiar with. I suppose that if you enjoy blowing up robots, then youll love this arc. The architect does try to hang a story around the random destruction, but ultimately the point is just to blow up robots. There were some plot holes (covered in the review above), and I noticed a lot of minor typos, mostly with missing punctuations.
Also, Ive never played the Black Scorpion patron arc, so I have no idea if Dr. Quatrexins characterization is spot-on or not. Dr. Aeon didnt seem to speak with his correct voice.
Play my MA arcs!
Tracking Down Jack Ketch - ArcID #2701
Cat War! - ArcID #2788
[ QUOTE ]
I have a question for you. I received some input from several who have played the arc, that it would be more fun if the same villian group wasn't the main feature of all 5 missions. So here goes the question. You said: "The warning states that the story arc may contain: Elite Bosses, Extreme Elite Bosses, Extreme Bosses, and Extreme Lieutenants! I gulp, but I go ahead and accept the mission. I am playing this on CL 2, so the bosses will be bosses and the EBs will be EBs. Sounds like fun."
I am not quite sure if this was purely sarcastic or if you enjoy a challenge.....But I am considering changing my main villian group for my future mission. I may create a mixture of non-custom villians, or if that can't fit, use a non-costum group.
Do you have any types you enjoy fighting, or you think would make sense for a leap into the future.
[/ QUOTE ]
If I remember right, the villain group ended up not being too frustrating to fight. The only time I felt a little bit frustrated was when there were two of the "Fear Followers" mobs who were stacking ToHit debuffs on me, dropping my accuracy. But popping a few yellows and taking them out took care of that.
Really, my tanker is pretty durable and can survive most anything. I was a bit worried about the "Extreme Elite Boss" warning because some powersets make EBs tedious to fight (Willpower, Regen, Super Reflexes, etc.) None of your EBs had that problem, though.
The sheer amount of warnings on your arc might scare off potential players, though. But since it's a high-level arc, you do want your mobs to prove some challenge instead of being a complete walk-over.
As for changing the critter groups ... it's up to you. If you think it'll improve the story, go for it. That part didn't really bother me too much. I thought the custom mobs were fine, if a bit generic.
Play my MA arcs!
Tracking Down Jack Ketch - ArcID #2701
Cat War! - ArcID #2788
Thanks for the feedback, I'm glad you enjoyed both arcs! The reason I repeated the conclusion was because I didn't want teammates to miss out on text that only the leader can access. Now that I think of it, I could use some extra kilobytes...
In Pursuit of Liberty #251306
By @Gypsy Rose
Description: Liberty Rose Jones was an ordinary child or was she? Help Liberty find her true destiny if you dare.
My rating: 3 stars
I fire up my Lv50 Inv/Mace tanker, Citizen Razor. This story arc is heroic and 5 missions long, and the level range is 45-54. The warning states that the story arc may contain: Elite Bosses, Extreme Elite Bosses, Extreme Bosses, and Extreme Lieutenants! I gulp, but I go ahead and accept the mission. I am playing this on CL 2, so the bosses will be bosses and the EBs will be EBs. Sounds like fun.
The contact is Ms. Liberty. She basically asks me to save an innocent child, and then gives me reasons why she cant do it herself. Sure, Im a hero. Of course Ill save the child! The child is named Liberty Rose Jones, and the Family has kidnapped her. There will also be an ally there for me.
I enter the mission. The objectives are to find the safe, free Liberty, find Agent Liberty, and defeat Big AL. AL should be Al (lower case l).
Oh hey, theres a patrol, and it has custom villains. The group is called Anti Liberty League. The Anti Liberty League is an elite villain group determined to take over Paragon City and to deprive its citizens of freedom and liberty. It appears to be headed by somebody named MAL. The custom critter description makes the group sound as if they are individual members. Thats a tricky thing, since they are minions and its entirely possible you could see 5 Frozen Followers running around, all with the exact same origin story. Thatd certainly be an interesting coincidence. Well see how the mission is set up. Oh, they all have a FF theme going on.
Yeah, it is as I feared. Feline Follower shows up twice. So apparently there are two people in that group who just happens to have been cut by a cat and gotten cat-like powers. I get what the architect is trying to do, but really, if the custom critter is a minion or lieutenant, the description should be vague and generic. Making it too specific makes it look odd when you have multiple versions of the same person running around. Only bosses, Elite Bosses, and Archvillains should have specific origins in the bio.
Anyway, I find Agent Liberty and free her. She says Its about time you showed up. How did she know I was coming? Shes a member of the Liberty Elite, the special ops division of the Liberty League. She kicks hard.
I find Big Al and beat him. Apparently hes cousin to the mysterious MAL mentioned in the bios of the Anti-Liberty League. I know this because I found a note on Big Als body telling him to kidnap this Liberty Rose Jones fellow. I also find a family tree in a safe. An Alexis Cole is mentioned in the family tree. Cole is the last name of Statesman. Coincidence? I dont think so. Well find out.
I find little Liberty and free her. The system message informs me that I have saved the future! Awesome, and I wasnt even trying! I get a note from Agent Liberty explaining to me what I already knew, in case I wasnt reading the bios. Mission over, I go back to Ms. Liberty. She thinks up of ways to give me thanks and instead of giving me anything she just says Youre a hero and dont need any thanks! Ill be sending her the bill from my psychiatrist.
OK, on to Mission #2. Seems like little Liberty just cant stay out of trouble. Shes disappeared in some cave, and I have to go and save her again. Oh, and theres some treasure too. Not surprisingly, the Anti-Liberty League (ALL) is there. Guess I gotta kick some ALL behind again.
The objective is simple. Find the treasure and save little Liberty again. I find little Liberty soon enough. She said she could've taken care of it ok maybe not. After freeing her, we head off to find the treasure, which I do in short order. There is a mysterious costume in the treasure. Apparently this costume is for little Liberty. Mission over. Back to Ms. Liberty. Shes a bit contradictory. First she said that since Im a hero, I dont need any money for doing my stuff. Now she thinks that I went after the treasure to get money.
Mission #3 time. Ms. Liberty goes all Ocarina of Time on me and tells me that its been SEVEN YEARS since we last talked! Im guessing Little Liberty is not so little anymore. She says it seems like only moments ago. Well, thats because it WAS moments ago!
Guess what? Yep, its time to go and save Little Libertys not-so-little bottom again. Shes wandered off in some enchanted garden looking for a book. *shrug* Whatever you say, Ms. Liberty. I go off to save little Liberty for a third time.
The objective is to free little Liberty, find the book, and defeat a boss named Fern Fatale. The mission is full of the ALL goons, and for some random reason theres also DE in the mission. I dont know if this is a bug or intended. Its the outside forest map. When I saw enchanted garden I was expecting a Croatoa map.
Anyway, I find Fern Fatale. Shes an plant controller / mind controller boss surrounded by a bunch of DE granite lieutenants. All of which drop those annoying carnies. Oh this is going to be so much fun. I take the granites out first, then focus on Fern Fatale. When I defeat her, she says you may have killed me, but you will never defeat MAL! Problem is, in CoH lore, we dont kill anybody. We defeat them. Id change the instances of kill into defeat or stop instead to be more consistent with CoH lore.
OK, Fern Fatale is out of the way now. Time to find Little Liberty and that blasted book. Oh great, now Im alliterating too. I quickly find the book, and its a journal. What is a journal doing in a garden? I dont know. It tells me that little Liberty is Miss Libertys granddaughter (which would make her Statesmans great-granddaughter). Didnt see that one coming, did you? It also mentions something about two swords that make the user very powerful. Im guessing MAL will be Dual Blades.
Now that I have the book, its time to go and find not-so-little Liberty. I run around the map for a little bit and finally find Liberty Rose Jones. To paraphrase Hartigan from Sin City, Skinny little Liberty, she grew up, filled out. Her bio mentions something about swordplay. I guess Liberty Rose Jones is the dual blades one then, not MAL. Anyway now that I found her, the mission is over. I bring Liberty around a little bit to see her in action. Shes an EB, but she only kicks things. Martial Arts then. I leave the mission.
I visit Ms. Liberty again. Ah, the magic swords are missing! That explains it. I guess I know what Im doing next. Ms. Liberty tells me that I need to journey to a possible future and get the magic swords, or all is lost! Liberty Rose Jones must fulfill her destiny! For some reason I wonder how Ill get back. Duh, Ill just use the Ouroboros portal to come back. Anyway, its off to the future I go.
Mission #4. Its the ruined Atlas map! The objective is to find the coffin and rescue Statesman?!? Wait, I thought I was here to find the swords! Well, lets see what happens. In any case, I go over the entire map and find nothing. Thats not the first time thats happened to me on that map. I swear this map hates me. I decide to start killing enemies and see what happens. As soon as I type this, I find Statesman. Hes held in an energy field. I free him, and he tells me to take the magical swords to his great-granddaughter. He also gives me a note to give to Liberty Rose Jones that tells her she must wear the costume and take the swords and become a great hero! Now its time to look all over the map again to find the coffin.
I suppose this is a good time to mention that Im deaf, so its not as easy for me to find clickies on map as it is for everybody, since I cant hear it beeping. That can make finding a clickie that blends into the background on a large outdoors map frustrating for me. Just as I am about to quit and call it a night, I find the coffin. As expected, the two swords are in the coffin. Now that the mission is mercifully over, I go back to Ms. Liberty. I guess its time to make Liberty Rose Jones face her destiny.
OK, its mission #5. Guess what? Yep, I need to save Liberty Rose Jones again! Call it a hunch, but Im guessing Ill have to fight MAL in this mission. Ms. Liberty tells me that I do have to fight Master Al, or MAL. Hes tough and I should bring friends. Id suggest making this part orange so that it stands out. In any case, I totally disregard that advice and enter the mission. Im a solo act all the way, baby!
The mission pop-up has a typo in it. Depends on should be two separate words. The objective is to rescue Liberty Rose and defeat MAL. Its another outdoors map, this time with graves! At least Liberty Rose is very easy to find this time, except shes called Liberty Storm now. Oh, its another toon. Might want to put that as an optional objective somewhere. I guess shes here to help me fight MAL. I leave her behind. I also free Agent Liberty and Statesman just for the heck of it. They're also not in the objectives. I'd suggest putting them in there as well.
I find MAL and ditch all of my allies. Let's see if I can deal with him solo. Its a bit tricky, and I do use inspirations, but I manage to take him down. The worst part was also dealing with the Dark/Dark Lieutenant, who was constantly dropping my accuracy. Once he went down, the battle was cake. MAL is a Robots/Force Field mastermind. All the extra robots do is provide my inv tanker with ToHit bonuses. They do drain a little bit of endurance, but popping blues is enough to deal with that. MALs bio merely says that hes strong and eveeeellllll.
OK, MALs down. Its off to find Liberty Rose again. At least shes easier to find, as shes in the same green magic field that Liberty Storm and Agent Liberty were in. I free her, and the mission is over. Ive saved the world! Go go me! And the story arc is over.
Final Summary: The story arc was okay. I had a few frustrating moments in Mission #4, and nothing about the story really drew me into it. I was mostly just playing babysitter to Liberty Rose. MAL was evil just for the sake of being evil. The custom enemies were not too bad, although the dark/dark Lts did get a bit annoying if there were two in a group and their tohit debuffs stacked. There were some leaps in logic, such as the dairy just sitting around in a garden and the magical swords somehow being in the future. And for such an important person that was so vital to the future being saved, Liberty Rose sure got captured a lot. Ultimately, this arc was basically just an origin story for Liberty Rose, and I was only there to help facilitate it. The story wasn't bad, and it did have some good moments and logically it held together well. It just didn't really grab my attention.
Play my MA arcs!
Tracking Down Jack Ketch - ArcID #2701
Cat War! - ArcID #2788