Play My Arc & Earn a Chance for Free Art!
By
airhead,
Posted on: 2009-07-09 11:58 in Mission Architect
Okay, I played it. My feedback is probably best summed up by the word 'Wow!!!!'.
Fantastic use of the AE mechanics and a great story to boot. Loved the mission entrance dialogues. Very worth the 5 stars I gave it. Sorry I can't give you a better constructive criticism dude, perfect imo. 
Ok just finished this arc. 5-starred it. Well-written and enjoyable to play. I really like the work you put into the custom group and the detailed descriptions of each one. I also like the 'associates' who get involved. The missions were set up nicely as well. The step-by-step development of each mission. Ex. 'rescue this one'. 'Thank you for rescuing me. Oh, so and so is here that needs to be taken down'
Maybe the devs couldve used your help writing the newest TF/SF.
Well done story arc. I took Pogoman on it and wore his 'muay thai/kick fu' style outfit. Felt appropriate to wear in this one. 
-Pogoman, Master of Kick-Fu
-Co-Leader and recruiting officer of the Virtue Honor Guard
- lvl 50 ma/sr scrapper
-Ace O' Diamonds lvl 50 fire/rad controller
and waaaay to many other alts to mention right now
Hi Bayani (long time fan of your character by the way). I ran your Arc solo with a 47 Tanker on Unyielding.
Act 1
(1) mobs.
Like: Nice looking and interesting/varied powers. I really like the gi's and the eskrima bats. Powers wise, felt like fighting the Tsoo w/out the annoying healers and phasers. Good mix-up on the spawns, too. I like how each spawn had the same 2 types of guys with a 3rd wildcard, so I was both prepared on what to expect while still being wary of what kind of mob that 3rd guy is.
Dislike: Slows. Slows annoy me, I don't enjoy them at all. The quicksands, mostly. Fighting a boss with slows is ok, but having to crawl out of a slow patch every spawn is a pain.
(2) Objectives.
Like: The Weapon Schematic was well placed, felt like it was guarded by the 1st boss. The ambush after finding it was good, too. Maybe move the Weapon Schematic glowy over towards the area the boss was at so you don't have to fight the ambush on the small walkway.
Dislike: I would reduce the the number of crates to 1 (I'm in this for the action, not hunt the glowie). Place it strategically like the Weapon Schematic to lead the player to a key map location.
Not Sure: The mission window said to "Not let Kapitan sound the alarm". My fight with him was just that, a straight up fight . . . didn't notice anything happening with him trying to sound an alarm.
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Act 2
(1) Mobs.
Like: I love Arachnos mobs. Good choice.
Not Sure: Strength of patrols/ambushes (especially the wave of back-ups the final boss calls). I ran this solo with a 47 tanker and I had to use all my powers and a lot of inspirations (was really fun!). Don't know how well a more squishy AT could handle it solo. Maybe make the hostage a fighter/helper (is that possible in AE?).
(2) Objectives.
Like: The trapped graphics on the hostage are very cool.
Dislike: The final objective(s) was confusing. After freeing the hostage I led her to the exit thinking the "Defeat Chapman to escape" would be an ambush on the way there. Had to back track 2 floors to finish the mission. Maybe I missed some mission text or something, but the small mission objective window made me think it would be a "stop the escort from reaching the exit" encounter.
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Act 3
Short and sweet. Good wrap up to a fun arc.
This was the 1st AE mission I've run. I didn't really know where to leave mission comments in game, sorry. I did get a Star Rating screen, though. Gave ya 4 stars. I had to dock you 1 star for the slows (did I mention I hate slows?).
[u]General Analsis:[u]
Very nice arc. Had a lot of fun with this one, especially fighting the bosses. At +2, they are a real challenge, and I was down to my last bit of health plenty of times before managing to pull out an odds-defying win. Truly excellent gameplay with the customs - don't change a thing.
I also liked the depth of your setting and characters. Really shows you put a lot of thought into this arc. However, at times it's too much (or not enough, depending on your point of view), as several entities are mentioned as if they are important and the player should know about them, then forgotten completely and/or never expanded upon. If you decide to keep these references, they need exposition detail somewhere. For example, I may know who Bayani is, but my character didn't have a clue, so the question 'who is Bayani?' is never answered and leaves my alien cyborg scratching is head. 
But while I noticed this great attention to detail in some areas, I found the exact opposite in others: a great lack of attention to detail. The first occurrence of this are the crates in the first mission. The interact bar text is there, telling me I'm rummaging, but once I'm done, I'm never told what I found. Yes, I get a clue, but from where? Was that clue really in the crate? Moreover, what was in the 2 crates I did not get a clue from? True, common sense says 'the weapons, duh', and it's technically a minor detail in the grand scheme of things, but it does give the impression that you didn't bother to carry your attention to detail all the way through. The same applies to the weapon schematics.
I noticed the same with a good number of mission objectives that just popped out of nowhere without any indication. Kapitan Remalante? Fortunata Chapman? Who are these people and why are they suddenly here? Most important, how does the player character know a new foe has arrived? Was there a suspicious sound down a hallway? Did a hostage blab? Did the newly appeared foe yell, 'here I am, come get a piece'? By the way, these are all very valid options that can be used to introduce them.
Another issue of this type is that your 'defeat boss' objectives often don't complete when the boss goes down. Instead, the guards need to be defeated as well. The navigation text should reflect this. In some spots, you can remedy this by simply adding 'and guards' or the like, while in others you should change the objective so it only requires the boss to go down to be completed.
Now then, keep in mind that up to now, none of the above is truly egregious. You do have 2 major plot holes, though: how Guro Dahon manages to come back after her first defeat and why the final Guro does not appear until the is defeated again should be explained. Dark Regeneration only accounts for so much 
Finally, just because I couldn't really find a spot to cover this pair of minor plot holes independently, I'll tack them on here: the initial mission objectives in the first mission need some explanation as well, as the only one the contact covers is defeating the rogue Guro, and the final Guro fighting alongside the followers of the rogue Guros is also somewhat questionable. Still, it was en excellent arc, fun to play, enjoyable to read, and - though at times a little logically disconnected - an adventure that felt very dynamic. The only addition I have to suggest is that you add some patrols with dialogue to missions 1 and 3 like you did in 2. They just make the place feel much more alive. Other than that, very nice job.
[u]Mission Details:[u]
Mission 1:
- minor plot hole: in the intro, the contact mentions Renato Angeles as if the player is already familiar with this person; however, this is the first mention of this person
- in the navigation text, I see 'open crates', which would read much smoother as 'crates to open'
- minor plot hole: there is next to no connection between the mission objectives in the nav. text and the briefing. The only objective the contact has given the player any information about is defeating Guro Kulog
- the crates have no begin or complete interaction text
- minor plot hole: Weapon Parts mentions Clan Asero as if the player is familiar; however, this is the first mention of this group
- defeating Kulog does not complete the 'defeat Guro Kulog' objective. You should add 'and guards' or something to the nav. text there or change the objective to complete upon boss defeat
- Weapon Schematics has no begin or complete interaction text
- minor plot hole: Kapitan Remalante's arrival is not logically linked to the mission objectives; i.e. there should be something that informs the player that he is here and should be stopped from sounding the alarm
- Kapitan Remalante's dialogue is missing a d at the end of 'supposed'
- defeating Kapitan Remalante does not complete the corresponding objective; nav. text should reflect this. Also, 'before he sounds the alarm' did not seem to have any bearing on the fight, and thus feels superfluous
- Secret Door has both present and past tense in the clue text, both of which apply to the player's actions. Should be changed to speak only in present or past tense, not a mixture of the two
Mission 2:
- minor plot hole: in the intro, the contact mentions Niyebe and Magasasaka as if the player is already familiar with these people; however, this is the first mention of them
- defeating Guro Dahon does not complete the corresponding objective; nav. text should reflect this
- minor plot hole: Fortunata Chapman's arrival is not logically linked to the mission objectives; i.e. there should be something that informs the player that she is here and is preventing the player's escape
- Defeat Fortunata Chapman and Escape reads a little awkwardly; would be smoother if the and was a to
- minor plot hole: Guro Niyebe's bio mentions Bayani as if the player is already familiar with this person; however, this is the first mention of this person
Mission 3:
- major plot hole: why do I need to defeat Guro Dahon a second time?
- defeating Dahon does not complete the corresponding objective. You should add 'and guards' or something to the nav. text there or change the objective to complete upon boss defeat
- Dahon fights with blades, but her bio still says she favors her guns
- major plot hole: why is the final Guro's apperance dependent on Dahon's defeat?
- minor plot hole: why does the final Guro fight with the students that follow the traitor Guro instead of against them?
"If I had Force powers, vacuum or not my cape/clothes/hair would always be blowing in the Dramatic Wind." - Tenzhi
Characters
Ok so over all, this mission was a great mission and I would play on other of my guys. Saying this there are things I would you to change to make this set of missions a lot better.
To start off I will talk about the grammar/spelling. Now there is some minor grammar and spelling issues in this set of missions. The first thing I noticed that would fall under this would be in the second paragraph in the first mission description. You have the alot in it when it should be a lot. The next thing I noticed was in the second to last sentence in the description of Sundalo ng Asero. In it there is the word report when it should be reports by changing it you will make that sentence not a fragment sentence. Finally I found in Guro Kulog description that you put Dahon offered him a way out by providing assistance with his financial crisis, then promised greater wealth in return for his loyalty and support. Now crisis, then should be crisis, Dahon also to make that sound a lot better. Other than this I did not find any thing else, note I forgot to check the bosses so you might want to just copy and paste those on word and see if you find something.
Next I will be talking about the story it self. It was a good story but I found a few things that I did not like. One was that in the start you had a lot of text and I read it all and the story sounded good, but further I went in the mission more it seemed that the story was lacking. I persanly think that there should be more you right in it. Anther issue I had was the Arachnos. You did not explain why the hell they were even there. I think you should add this into your story make it make since because I didnt know who I was the real enemy at the end and left me with questions. This did not make the missions worse it just made me a bit lost. One other thing with the story was in the first mission. The last paragraph just sounded weird to me when I read it. I would change it to something like this,
[ QUOTE ]
I have been watching your career, [name]. You have demonstrated many of the same qualities that successful Pagkagising candidates have had. While you're here, why don't you take the Pagkagising test and see how you do.
[/ QUOTE ]
Anther thing that I would change is in the second part of the first missions text. I would get rid of, Thank you for humoring me. This just kind of kills the mood. It sounds like this guy doesnt care about me and would rather see me fail then succeed if you got rid of this it would make it a lot better. The final thing I need to say is put some color in the text. Just seems bland and boring and if you put color in the story it will make it look more appealing and more will want to play it other than looking at it and thinking it is just a bore fest.
Finally I am going to go over the missions them self. The real issue I had with a lot of them was that you needed to kill an entire mob to be done with the mission when it seems that you should just be able to kill the boss and be done with it. This has always bugged me about normal missions but they put in & guards. You might want to do this or change it around. Anther thing I want to say is that I really thought that the second mission was just a mess. The only mobs there was, was for the patrols, bosses, and the rescue mobs. This just kind of sucked because I ran into very few guys in the entire mission and this just made me think what the hell is going on and I received very little xp in the entire mission. Anther thing of the final mission was the rescue. She never exited; I dont know if it is something you did or if it is just a bug but it just was weird and it just didnt seems right at all.
In all this was a great mission and even with all the bad I said it was a still good. Just touch it up a bit and I think it will be great.
[ QUOTE ]
But while I noticed this great attention to detail in some areas, I found the exact opposite in others: a great lack of attention to detail. The first occurrence of this are the crates in the first mission. The interact bar text is there, telling me I'm rummaging, but once I'm done, I'm never told what I found. Yes, I get a clue, but from where? Was that clue really in the crate? Moreover, what was in the 2 crates I did not get a clue from? True, common sense says 'the weapons, duh', and it's technically a minor detail in the grand scheme of things, but it does give the impression that you didn't bother to carry your attention to detail all the way through. The same applies to the weapon schematics.
[/ QUOTE ]
This is a limitation of the game mechanics. If there are multiples of something to find, e.g. "Find the Weapons" with 4 crates of them, then the clue is given when the first one is clicked, then nothing for the others in the group. The exact same thing happens in regular arcs, and there is nothing anyone can do about it, unless the Devs make some changes in the engine.
Justice Blues, Tech/Tank, Inv/SS
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Fighting The Future Trilogy
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[edit]opps didn't no if it sent because my computer crashed.
[ QUOTE ]
This is a limitation of the game mechanics. If there are multiples of something to find, e.g. "Find the Weapons" with 4 crates of them, then the clue is given when the first one is clicked, then nothing for the others in the group. The exact same thing happens in regular arcs, and there is nothing anyone can do about it, unless the Devs make some changes in the engine.
[/ QUOTE ]
You misunderstand. I am saying each crate should have system interaction text, not that each one needs its own clue.
"If I had Force powers, vacuum or not my cape/clothes/hair would always be blowing in the Dramatic Wind." - Tenzhi
Characters
Random thoughts.
<ul type="square">[*]You really know how to compel somebody to read the description texts for every new custom mob encountered.[*]As to the crates in the first mission, you are aware that it is possible (without adding significant file size overhead) to have multiple mission objectives chained to a single objective display in the nav bar by using identical "plural" texts? (E.g. the bar says "4 hostages to save". Three ("hostage to save") are separate hostage events. One is a clickable coffin.) By this artifice, you can have different events for each without cluttering the nav bar with separate objectives of different kinds.[*]I did enjoy the mobs and their variety.[*]The chained objectives could have been set up a bit more clearly; perhaps prefigure them in the ambush texts for the prior goals?[/list]
<《 New Colchis / Guides / Mission Architect 》>
"At what point do we say, 'You're mucking with our myths'?" - Harlan Ellison
[ QUOTE ]
I also liked the depth of your setting and characters. Really shows you put a lot of thought into this arc. However, at times it's too much (or not enough, depending on your point of view), as several entities are mentioned as if they are important and the player should know about them, then forgotten completely and/or never expanded upon. If you decide to keep these references, they need exposition detail somewhere. For example, I may know who Bayani is, but my character didn't have a clue, so the question 'who is Bayani?' is never answered and leaves my alien cyborg scratching is head.
[/ QUOTE ]
I might've over-did it in that case. On my first attempt at this arc, I received alot of scathing global messages about Mary-Sueism so I opted to reference Bayani/Angeles less.
[ QUOTE ]
But while I noticed this great attention to detail in some areas, I found the exact opposite in others: a great lack of attention to detail. The first occurrence of this are the crates in the first mission. The interact bar text is there, telling me I'm rummaging, but once I'm done, I'm never told what I found. Yes, I get a clue, but from where? Was that clue really in the crate? Moreover, what was in the 2 crates I did not get a clue from? True, common sense says 'the weapons, duh', and it's technically a minor detail in the grand scheme of things, but it does give the impression that you didn't bother to carry your attention to detail all the way through. The same applies to the weapon schematics.
[/ QUOTE ]
I'll take a look at the clue boxes again. I thought I wrote in the weapon parts clue that the parts were found in the crates.I didn't want to clutter up the clue window with multiple instances of the same clue.
[/ QUOTE ]
I noticed the same with a good number of mission objectives that just popped out of nowhere without any indication. Kapitan Remalante? Fortunata Chapman? Who are these people and why are they suddenly here? Most important, how does the player character know a new foe has arrived? Was there a suspicious sound down a hallway? Did a hostage blab? Did the newly appeared foe yell, 'here I am, come get a piece'? By the way, these are all very valid options that can be used to introduce them.
[/ QUOTE ]
I kinda took the approach that the simulation is a pop quiz, and the player(s) who take it do not know what's coming. As such, I treated the nav bar objectives as something for the players to reference OOC, in case they get stuck or the spawns and such weren't place where they should've been placed. I'll try to link the objectives a little more clearly. In the case of that whiteboard schematic for instance, ideally I would want Remalante/Chapman to spring up and ambush you, but I haven't been able to figure out how to get a named boss ambush to occur, if it was at all even possible.
[ QUOTE ]
Now then, keep in mind that up to now, none of the above is truly egregious. You do have 2 major plot holes, though: how Guro Dahon manages to come back after her first defeat and why the final Guro does not appear until the is defeated again should be explained. Dark Regeneration only accounts for so much
[/ QUOTE ]
I'll fix her unaware dialogue to shed a little more light on what might've gone down. There currently isn't a way (as far as I know) to be able to let her escape the second mission. Usually though, it's rarely explained how villains pop up again after being arrested or defeated. Since I use the nav bar to give the player OOC information on what needs to be done to exit the mission and well, make sure that things happen in the proper sequence. I didn't want people to skip out on fighting Dahon.
[ QUOTE ]
Finally, just because I couldn't really find a spot to cover this pair of minor plot holes independently, I'll tack them on here: the initial mission objectives in the first mission need some explanation as well, as the only one the contact covers is defeating the rogue Guro, and the final Guro fighting alongside the followers of the rogue Guros is also somewhat questionable.
[/ QUOTE ]
I'll see if I can separate/distinguish between the rogue group and the academy's group using group titles. Dahon's plans were spoiled by the player/Angeles in mission 2, so the group in mission three are Magsasaka's people, who are still instructed to stop the challenger as part of the Pagkagising. I can try to use the mission briefings/de-briefings to reflect that.
[ QUOTE ]
Anther thing I want to say is that I really thought that the second mission was just a mess. The only mobs there was, was for the patrols, bosses, and the rescue mobs. This just kind of sucked because I ran into very few guys in the entire mission and this just made me think what the hell is going on and I received very little xp in the entire mission. Anther thing of the final mission was the rescue. She never exited; I dont know if it is something you did or if it is just a bug but it just was weird and it just didnt seems right at all.
[/ QUOTE ]
Yeah, I've been trying to fix that. I don't know if I'll just have to suck it up and put in a bigger map. I added in the patrols because it was so empty. Maybe the mission's bugged or the boss placement is preventing the enemies from spawning properly. I didn't want to use too big a map because escort missions become a bigger pain in the butt there. That issue about the escort is a game bug, I think but i'll check it out again and see.
--Edit--
Just wanted to clarify something else...I've noticed that there are some folks who are actually playing the arc but not submitting comments here or in-game. I don't want to over-look anyone's entry so please post on this thread if you do want a chance at the free character sketch.
Ok, I'll post here so you don't miss me when you get around to handing out the prizes.
Five stars. My only complaint was that this was a "simulation" and not "real". I would have loved making some of my characters members in this organisation for real.
Winner of Players' Choice Best Villainous Arc 2010: Fear and Loathing on Striga; ID #350522
Played this last night, it's definitely an enjoyable concept, although I have to concur that it would actually be pretty awesome to have it framed as a real initiation rather than a simulation. Perhaps with clues and dialogue to still talk about what happened on Angeles' run.
I would suggest changing the earth control customs to not have status protection. I didn't have any trouble with them personally since I was playing a scrapper, but anyone without their own status protection would be in for a very rough ride.
The story felt a little too cluttered, especially when it started to become difficult to separate legitimate instructors from the corrupt members. This actually might be a good argument for making the entire thing a real run rather than a simulation, with more of a focus on the lore behind the school and the fighting styles rather than the corruption following the war. I walked away with a pretty good idea what had happened, but the entire thing felt a little "blurry" for lack of a better term. Making the corrupt faction a visually distinct group would clear things up a bit if you could find the room, but the whole subplot between them and the Arachnos feels a little suffocated as it currently stands.
Good writing on the bios, definite attention to detail. All in all it was an interesting arc with a unique concept and I had a fun time running it. I gave it 4 stars, and if the story was made clearer and crisper I could definitely see it being 5.
Infatum on Virtueverse
Thanks for all the feedback so far. Been tweaking the story as I go. =)
Hey, I just played the story and I thoroughly enjoyed it. I awarded it four stars, but it could easily be a five star.
There were a few typos scattered here and there (sadly, I didn't take notes while playing. :-( I think I recall one typo in the very last thing the contact says to you, but can't remember what it was.) Nothing odd enough that it detracted from any enjoyment of the game, and probably only language nerds like me would notice, but I figured it might be worth mentioning.
I want to say that I enjoyed the "simulation" aspect of it. The Mission Architect is a part of the game's world, so it's nice to see this scenario treated as something actually happening as opposed to just some game that my character decided to play on a whim.
I'm not sure what could be done about this last one, but for some reason the first mission felt a great deal harder than the ones after. This might possibly be due to the fact that it was incredibly late when I ran the first mission and I was well rested when I completed the story, so perhaps this difference is all on my shoulders. ;-) It might have also been a somewhat more sudden introduction to the custom characters (I'm always surprised by endurance sappers) and having to adjust my normal playstyle. Not sure.
Regardless, it was a very fun and enjoyable story. Thanks. :-)
alright, well im not much of a writer myself (as in critiques and reviews) so I'll just list the things of note I found in your arc. I approached this very critically as it seemed to me you really want this arc improved and to become a hit, me patting you on the back and telling you its all good is of no help. so here are the notes i took while playing. they aren't particularly well organized but you should be able to make sense of them.
I like the concept that the mission architect is being used as a training tool. it's an angle I hadn't thought of.
great use of the costume creator for the contact. and characters in general. great enemy group. very diverse. but I would consider more powerful defensive power set's as there smashing and lethal resistance is ridiculously low, maybe a lvl 50 broadsword scrapper isn't the best judge, but a level 50 mission where I occasionally one shot orange minions is just too easy.
and maybe a little more diversity eg. one boy and one girl for each type of enemy. I'm aware that the restrictions of the architect don't allow for that easily but having the character's name in a foreign tongue gives you a bit more freedom.
grammatical error. in first line of first mission brief.
I liked the Informative Minion descriptions with the Philippine heritage in it, it was almost educational.
all the background story's for bosses were very well thought out.
first boss, seemed to be a little too storm centric for a champion fighter. Managed to take down my scrapper,
due to slowing attack rate which was a bit annoying. but shared the squishyness of the rest of the enemies due to no defensive set. I think going with an electric/electric brute would suit a bit better.
love the kung-fu fighting reference
second boss spelling/grammatical error 'you've ruining everything.'
the scripting for the arachnos banter was perfect, really gave off the apathetic arrogance of the arachnos and set a good mood for them if someone was to play this mission and didn't already know arachnos were jerks.
good scripting in general in fact.
another grammatical error in 3rd briefing.
fluctuating difficulty was a bit irking. I can imagine alot of blaster's rage quitting if they try and solo it. my scrapper went down twice in boss fight's, once was the first boss sapping my endurance and slowing my attacks to a stop and the second was in the final mission as a patrol crossed the path of the first boss spawn. both of them were bad luck, could have happened to anyone.
The minions in general for a lethal damage scrapper were just too easy. even the lieutenants. For me it just gave off the feeling that this apparently hard trial, was talked up a bit too much and it felt a bit like I was doing a mission for toons in there teens bumped up to level 50. I was using a fairly tough scrapper so I am willing to accept that may not be the case with all toons, In fact I'll run it again tomorrow on one of my blaster's and see how I go.
as for the bosses, they had a couple of trick's up their sleeves but were more or less fairly fragile as well.
All and all though, this is just my experience with the mission as a fairly tough build scrapper.
My only gripe with the story was that it seemed to expect a little to much pre-existing knowledge, i would have like to see more explanation in the mission briefings as to the importance of each of the characters be it boss or hostage.
Seems to me that you have a well thought out group of characters and the general foundation of a nice little "world" set up for the story to take place but the mission briefings just need a bit more tweaking to tell the story with the most effectiveness.
and a bit more work to balance the enemy group. but the Arc is almost there and still very entertaining! 3.5 stars but its only a few thing's keeping it down that can easily be fixed.
Like i said I'll try it again tomorrow with a different toon and see if my evaluation based on my scrapper's run will change due to the use of a squishyer archetype.
Hope my ramblings have made some sense and your able to find some useful help amongst it.
Scrappers in general will probably breeze through this mission, unless they kick it up to Invincible. Prior feedback indicated that the mobs were just too difficult, particularly when the bosses were Elite Status.
The arc is at a maximum; So with the file constraints, I can't add boy/girl diversity. There's just no space for it. As far as the story needing pre-existing knowledge, I'm not terribly sure what you mean by that. It's mentioned in the briefings that to complete the challenge, you have to battle 4 of the 5 instructors of the academy, and it was also explained that two of the instructors (Kulog/Dahon) were allied and attempted to attack/murder the two other instructors in the trial (Niyebe/Magsasaka). Each of those four characters had custom descriptions too.
[ QUOTE ]
As far as the story needing pre-existing knowledge, I'm not terribly sure what you mean by that. It's mentioned in the briefings that to complete the challenge, you have to battle 4 of the 5 instructors of the academy, and it was also explained that two of the instructors (Kulog/Dahon) were allied and attempted to attack/murder the two other instructors in the trial (Niyebe/Magsasaka). Each of those four characters had custom descriptions too.
[/ QUOTE ]
Hmmm Must have been the combination of me being tired and nagging players who wouldn't stop pestering me for a team when I was reading the briefs that caused my inability to follow it 100% then. I'll try it again tomorrow and see if i cant make more sense with a descent nights sleep. *looks at the clock* okay maybe I wont be getting a descent night's sleep tonight either... its 3:30am in Australia.
seems to me you've done the best you possible could with the architect tool and its limitations, so you should be very proud of what you've managed to produce. it's better then alot of the content that features in the game itself. the characters all looked great, and their backgrounds are all well developed. I could talk more but I fear my brain is going on power save... I'll try it again tomorrow with any luck I'll be able to concentrate on it more...
ran it again with a blaster,it was a much bigger challenge. and without all the incoming tells and invites I was able to concentrate on the story much better and I stand corrected, its a very well contained storyline and I felt much more immersed in the plot, I actually felt like I was in a martial art's movie :P knowing the limitations on file size better now, I think you have done a fantastic job of telling a well grounded story with the tool's provided. 5 stars
Writing this as I go.
Mission 1:
Nice intro, the simulation thing works since this is supposed to be reliving the past. However cut down on the colored text. For starters, I don't need the words Architect Entertainment pointed out to me and having them in dark green text when the background I am seeing the window against is green to begin with just makes the dialog harder to read.
As for the enemies, I like the costumes but am finding Electrical Melee and Armor to be a stretch for not only a human but a minion as well. I could maybe buy the melee on a Lt but not the Armor bit. There are also too many of these guys, seems like it's trivially easy to get lightning powers with Filipino Martial Arts. This end drain is also encouraging me to grab the electric brute. I have Stamina AND Quick Recovery yet am running below 50% end much of the time here.
And yes, there are way to many slows. I'm starting to wish I had brought Kathode (Elec/Elec Brute) instead of Vikki Vandale (Mace/Willpower Brute) for this. Siphon Speed is one of the most annoying debuffs in the game and lasts long enough that I'm easily running into another spawn and getting it stacked on me even more. Also be slowed and then dealing with running critters who have Quickness is another annoyance. Guro Kulog also overdoes it with the Freezing Rain.
By the way, the Kapitan's group was listed as "All Custom Characters".
Oh joy, Quicksand now as well. It's not like Vikki is taking any noticeable damage but she is getting annoyed with all the SLOWS.
Mission 2:
Pro-Tip: Reserve red text for warnings that the arc contains archvillains and/or elite bosses. Don't use it just to draw attention to the name of the group I'm fighting.
Hmmm, empty map.
Ah, there's Guro Dahon. Why did she summon Thugs? Ok, so the description makes sense, but I don't get the Dark Armor part. She also tried to use Dark Regen, which fortunately missed. Annoying power to put on a boss, you just want this battle to take forever? At least she didn't have Soul Transfer.
I just realized that this Earth Control guys have Unyielding as well. That's rather crappy as you created a LT mezzer who will need quadruple-stacked Holds to lock down. Prepare for the angry tells from Dominators and Controllers.
Why did this room fill with Arachnos right after I freed Guro Niyebe?
So that is why the front room was so empty, why did you feel the need to fill it with so many spawns of Arachnos?
Mission 3:
Once again, misusing the red text. Unless Filipino Vengeance is the name of an archvillain it has no business being highlighted in red.
Third abandoned office map in a row, this has gotten monotonous. What's also monotonous? Running into multiple spawns in a row with nothing but these Electrical minions in them. Why didn't I get to learn how to wield lightning when I was a kid? Seems everyone can do it here.
Oh great, a Stone/Stone Boss who lacks Stone Armor but has Rooted. I heard Doms and Controllers are getting together for a torch and pitchfork group discount.
Hmmm...
[NPC] Guro Magsasaka: A blow like that will not break my armor.
[NPC] Guro Magsasaka: Ah, I see your strategy now. You're not trying to break my defenses, are you...
Not sure what he meant there, but I certainly broke something of his with repeated bludgeoning by a baseball bat wielding Troll loli.
What, no clue for defeating him?
The Verdict:
Nothing wrong with the writing, aside from there being a LOT of Arachnos coming out of nowhere in mission 2 when I'd be expecting just a few spawns based on what I read in the briefings and debriefings. Most of the problems are in the critter design. I understand that balancing customs is hard, just look at how much work I had to do with "The Portal Bandits" and it's 17 customs. Some of it is just gameplay annoyances and others are a case of "why do they have that power of all things?"
Most I can give to it right now is 4-stars.
Just ran it. I honestly don't know what goes into making one of these arcs and what the tools/limitations are, so I guess I won't be quite as constructive as others... sorry!
I thought it was very well-constructed. It seemed very professional and just what I would expect from someone working on the game as a career. The premise worked nicely for the game and for a story arc.
All the little details were nice. I really liked the mission entrance texts! Like I said, overall it showed effort put in.
Like mentioned about people with scrappers, I sorta blew through it with my level 50 SR/Claws scrapper. I would have liked to have seen a bit more challenge in the last mission... more bosses or something. I don't know what the limitations of the creator are though, so maybe this wasn't possible. So while I was digging the story, I did get a little bored with the action. I did like your enemies, though. I was afraid at first that they would be very Tsoo-like and cringed, but they ended up not having the stuff that makes me avoid Tsoo like the plague, so I was highly relieved.
Rated it 4 out of 5, great work!
Ok. Updated the arc. Notable changes...
1) Added Female Baguhan models. Moved Electric Melee mobs to lieutenants. Moved Archery lieutenants to minion level and removed Ice Arrow.
2) Removed Unyielding and Quicksand from Earth Control Mobs. Added Earthquake.
3) Removed Dark Regen from Both Dahon bosses. Downgraded second appearance of Dahon's attacks to Hard.
4) Switched Final Boss to Stone Melee/Shield Defense (Extreme/Hard setting) from Stone Melee/Stone Defense. May be too easy. Might try Invuln instead.
5) Tweaked the second mission to get more mobs to spawn in the front by removing some Arachnos patrols and final boss ambush. (guess the reason why the front was empty is because the Arachnos spawns took their spots) Added a boss and some lieutenants to spawn in the front and middle. Lowered the Arachnos patrol numbers.
6) Tweaked the final mission and placed a few more lieutenant spawns. Lowered the # of patrols.
I thought it was a great concept. I loved the flavor text of the characters. It added a wonderful touch and helped fill in the background of the story.
I did notice an error in the open mission text on the first mission. When you first enter you have "decided that this abandoned office building located the slums." It needs to have "building located IN the slums" I know it's minor, but I noticed.
Also I thought that the final boss was a little too easy. I would definitely up that a notch. I was never in any danger of dying in the final battle and I think that you should be. (I was playing a blaster fyi)
I liked that you included plenty of higher level NPC's. They weren't all minions. Made the game challenging but not too hard.
A side note, and totally at your discretion would be the wording of clue 2 in mission 1. I think it would read better if wandered was wander and the sentence "As you finished reading you were alerted by a noise..." would flow better with the rest of the text as "As you finish reading you are alerted by a noise..."
Yeah. I'm tied to the rock concept of the final boss. In Bayani's origin story, it was his most difficult fight because Bayani's fire is pretty much in-effective against Rock Armor. In the story, Bayani uses a move called the Iron Palm (real martial arts move btw) which is effective because it's a penetrating strike; it doesn't chip/break the surface. Rather, you feel the Iron Palm strike inside...it leaves you with a sick to your gut feeling. Anyways, probably more than anyone would care to know.
I might end up switching him to Invincible defense. Or Willpower. I think Shield Defense is a bit too easy because if you're IO'd out or have powers like Build Up and Aim, it's easy to bust through. I didn't want the less offensive toons to struggle too much with him
Hello again, folks. I think I've played through and rated all the arcs that ended up on the ill-fated review thread I ran a few months ago. If you believe I missed yours, send me a PM and I'll get to it again. The feedback I received on my first attempt was very helpful and I've revamped my original arc considerably. It's still a work in progress, but I'd like to gather some feedback and see how I'm doing. *points to the title link* Look, it's even got a nice looking poster reference now.
Here's the "carrot". Work has been taking me away from being able to game regularly, and I don't have too much time to play/review other people's arcs. I'd still like to thank the folks who take the time to play through my storyarc and provide thoughtful, constructive feedback. So here's the deal, 2-3 lucky folks who play through my arc and post their feedback to this thread will receive a free sketch of their CoH/CoV character (or a character of their choice). Who will draw these sketches? Heck if I know. If you've seen my past commissions though, I am very picky about who I work with. This contest will run through the end of the month. Good luck everyone and thanks for your time.
Arc Name: Pagkagising ng Kaluluwa
Arc ID:230100
Faction: Heroes
Creator Global/Forum Name: @Bayani
Difficulty Level: Medium-Difficult (Custom mobs)
Synopsis: "Battle the Filipino martial arts masters of the Limang Paaralan"
Estimated Time to Play: 30-45 minutes