Ubermind

Really?

I cant remember the last thread I cast necromancy on.

I think it involved something wacky.

Really, it's mostly boredom.
And sleep deprevation.

I hear CoV has been released in Europe now.

This Movie is KICKIN!

No really. It rocks.

Well this seems like a good enough time to post it,

Take a look at why Ill never win an award for Art

The actual not draw by me Ubermind and Commander Haroquen


Sorry if I caues any major "THREAD DE-RAILZ0RZ!" but I could never get enough courage to make my own thread for the pictures.
Oh and I drew this about 6-7 months ago so my drawing skills have improved!...Marginally...


Edited for Spelling at 1 AM

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* "Looping Sound Crash" - We think we MAY have this finally fixed.


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You-Are-God. Period. Maby Excalmation Point. End Sentance. This has been my bane for quite some time now.

That is an AWESOME video. I still wish I could do that myself though :/

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Alternate universe Wind Widow project...interesting...
what's the opposite of an anti-hero?

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Anti-Villain....see hardcase

I hate him soooo much

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*SNIP* Paragon PD

*SNIP*

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Sorry but Ive just got to ask, How did you do that?

page 10.

Jenkins trys to become a Meat Doctor for the freakshow!


Jenkins: Soooo...hows it hangin...dude?

Doc Buzzsaw: Ok look I spilled some blood from PwnzxXx0rs latest re-fitment onto your resume...Gawd its huge...but I can still make out that you worked for the vahzilholk for a time correct?

Jenkins: Yes...say could you maby..give me a chair? This stack of scrap Im sitting on just gave me tetnus...

Doc Buzz: Look do you have a cutting impliment?

Jenkins: Yep. Mr. Hurty!

Doc Buzz: ohhhh k....Well do you have any prior experience in human/cybernetic releation?

Jenkins: No...But I might accidentally be the father of a clockwork machination of evil that wanders paragon. Does that count?

Doc Buzz: Yea yea, whatever lets just cut this short, Ive got a bad hangover from lastnights party and am about this close *waves a saw blade in jenkins face* to cutting you short.

Jenkins: urrr. I think my lockjaw is setting in. Maby this isnt the best job fo,,

Doc Buzz: LOOK SMALL STUFF! I happen to be one of the most powerful people in the freakshow so unless you happen to have anything valuebal to give me youve wasted my morning and when I waste my morning people DIE.

Jekins: Well I geuss I go *seizing up sound* urk...mah shaw...

Doc Buzz: Ohh Your resume says you have incredibal regenerative powers. I sure could use some extra parts for my experiments...

Jenkins: luddy bell....


((If your wondering when Jenkins was responseibal for a giant clockwork check the time he tried to start his own gang))

Actually I had an idea, why not ley civvies take damage but once they are "defeated" how about they dissapear in a emergency teleporter flash like they just got hit by a police drone. I mean I think that Dr. Echo from the missions he appears in does that when hes "defeated"

Ok resume your normal posting.

Yea I noticed that to. Id really love it to be able to blow up the inside of the paragon PD.

Let me restate. The time bonueses are not random. They are stacking and higher con objects give you bigger chains of time.
Object levels are locked so yes a crate can con purple to you becaues its stronger than your current powers are.
Think about it. In real life can you just run outside and punch a metal crate and expect it to esplode?
Also I think that the side missions are randomly seeded so one mish you could get a fire bomb but the next a pawn broker.

Well if you had run around blowing up everything and destroying everything I think you would have gotten a AV version of some hero.
I dont think you ever get a Boss hero except maby in the low levels but then again Im not sure. I just threw the B into my line of ranks becaues I wasnt sure if people got Bosses.
In my mission with the level 40's were I was SK'ed they got an EB becaues they all just beelined to the bank after sweeping the police station. However my level 22 MM got wailed on by a very angry strong valkyrie after looting the vault.

Afew noes I have mentally gathered one 4 diffrent mayhem missions. 2 I ran with simultanious strategys but never got to the vault. 1 I sk'ed with a group of level 40's and we got all the side missions and the bank. 1 I ran trying to destroy the entire area of steel canyon and side missions.

1) The more damage and side missions you do the more powerful the end hero is so there is no need to gripe that you were unfairly seated with a AV/EB/B You brought it on yourself.

2) The firebomb mission really does need a time maby counting down from 10 to give you time to run but still encourage you to get the hell out.

3) The random !BOXES! !BUSSTOP! !ETC! bonuses you may get are actually from the missions roving bad guy mobs wreaking havok as well. The damage they induce is added to your damage.

4) It seems (to me) that the kidnap side mission is unfairly hard for soloers as you can quickly get pigon holed into the long corridor by a duel ambush of swat bent on rescueing the kidnapping vic and longbow bent on killing you.


5) The prision cells should be made alittle bigger becaues pet pathfinding gets borcked by that as well as the steel doors should be given vulnerability to smashing/lethal (personal opinion on last part)


6) The civvies should either take damage and be "defeated" or on a diffrent shot take damage and run to the nearest non-side mission door and dissapear for inf and exp.

7) Personal suggestion but how about some paragon city police vehicals? Like Patrol cars, swat vans, longbow APC's.

8) I may be a fringe or even lone minority but I for one enjoy the swat glue nades. Not so much in they glue me but they actually are a fun challange. Granted maby a bit of a nerf on the time between how long between nades but still I like it.

9) The choice between 2 diffrent areas for a mayhem mission. It may be fun running about gunnin down everything in god and sin but still I would like some variation between my mayhem missions. Like your broker would let you chose between robbing the comercial distric of founders falls or the financial district and both would have diffrent side missions or mob spawns.


Sorry if I rambled. Hope you enjoyed the post.

I figured out the following (assumeing this isnt common knowledge) Its not a bug you dont get time for every object you blast but if you blast a larger number of object (like 20 crates) after you get the first one you unlock a larger time bonus. I had fun racking up major time rolling through parking meters, boxes and trash cans.
Also to find the bonus objectives I *think* you have to nail a cop to get the release the villain side mish, and to get the keys to the door missions you need to lay the smack down on villain mobs bosses (or lt's depending on difficulty) and to find the door try and refrence what they talked about (Like if they say "Hey this warehouse is full of phat lootz!" try looking in the nearest warehouse)


Thats all I got.

Jenkins and The MU division of arachnos!

Jenkins is seens writheing across a chainlink floor vainly yelling for help. Enter left a Mu Striker Boss


MSB: Jenkins my good man what seems to be the matter?

Jenkins: I.....can .....*huuuuuuuuuuuuufffffffff*..... breath..... or....... *squirm* ....walk.....

MSB: oh well that wont do. Let me simply cut those bonds.

Much time and some burn ointment later

Jenkins: SO how exactly am I supposed to learn to fly or conjure energy or anything all bound like that?

MSB: Well your supposed to channle your magical abilitys into the suit and then after some work and effort you can breath right and then...

The Mu drones on and jenkins nods off. The next sound audible is a alarm

J: OHMYGAWD! NO REQUIM I WASNT ASLEEP AT MEIN STATION JAHWOL!

MSB: oh dont worry. Thats just the incurssion alarm. It goes away.

J: Wait you mean a alarm just went off and we sit here?

MSB: Well Im sure the 3 flunkies and ball of fluff we sent to check it out will solve it.

J: Right.......can I turn in my 2 weeks notice? Im just not cut out for....

The sound of a explosion echoes down the hall. A generator obviously just esploded into bits.

J:......

MSB: .....

J: Arnt you going to check that out?

MSB: No. Im sure it was just a slight mal....

The MSB writhes in the air for a moment then falls upon jenkins bloody and oozing magic

Stalker: Hey....isnt this the funniest ragdoll effect evar? Cmon. someone hit it with a AoE! r0f1c0p73r!

A grenade sends Jenkins hurtling through a hole in the wall. He begins to fall into the infinite vast black abyss.

J: Well bloody hell......

Jenkins and teh snowmen from hell!


Jenkins is in a small cramped dark place

J: So.....anyone want a bite of my samwich?

Blight: grrrr.....woooshhh.......brrrrr

J: right so......what do we do?

Suddenly the box burst open in a flurry of confetti and naughty stickers

Hero: OH HELLLLLLLL!

B: Graaar

The young hero dies to the level 50 winter hoard totally not lord snow man

J: so now what. Is that it? I mean all we did was beat the unholy hell out of a unlucky hero who will probably bring 4000 of his freinds to beat us senseless

The snowman begins melt into nothing

J: riiight....this group sucks. Were not even villains. Were a winter gimmick. Im out of here you slushier pile of cr....ohhh a gift!

Jenkins opens the gift and is crushed by a real actual honest to god winter lord the size of a home

J: hi.....ughhhh

WL: Graahhh....Me likes funny squishums toy.....

J: Bloody helll......

Jenkins and WYVREN! ZOMG!


Jenkins walks into a Arachnos base
Sign on door: NO WYVREN HERE! GO AWAY!
Jenkins: Umm hello?
Talon Wing Agent: Shhhhh be quiet. You want Doctor Aeon to hear us blowing up his favorite pet cat terry-lumpus-schmooky-woo
Jenkins: ummmm ok?
TWA: right anyways. Come on in before anyone sees us consorting with a know criminal
Jenkins: ummm sure? Dont you guys kinda like....flagrantly flaunt any type of law or morality?
Jenkins fumbles to enter round arachnos door
TWA: Shhhhh do you think Manticore would want to hear that type of talk? He thinks were makein brownies in here with arachnos super mega death (micro)wave
Jenkins: *oomph* Right well ya see thats just it. How can NO ONE realize that Manticore supports a freaking criminal orginization that actively does terrorist threats abroad?
TWA: WHAT? How did you know our connection to manticore? *GASP* YOU MUST BE OF THE HIGHEST ELCHEON OF ARACHNOS ESPIONAGE!
Jenkins: nooo....I kinda just sorta...ya know...happend to notice manticores " I WUBBLES TEH WYVREN! " shirt and all and put 1 and 1 together.
TWA: Right....anyways come this way and meet our funder for this operation. DOCTOR ECHO!
Doc Echo: Oh hi!
Jenkins: Is it just me or does this guy kinda resemble...
Greasy gnome: SPOILER ALERT!!!! OMGZORS!
Jenkins: Ok....what the Humping Zeus titain was that?
TWA: oh he does that sometimes.
Jenkins: righhhhhttt....anyway dosnt this guy kinda resemble doctor Aeon?
DE: Oh thats becaues Im his cloned cousin 3 times removed sent back to the past becaues somehow someone somewere someway leveld the world and Im here to correct it!
Jenkins: ohhh.....I think I just went oogly in my noogly....
Greasy gnome: SPOILER OVER!!! MUAHAHAH!
TWA: So....lets get down to standin around obliviously...
Jenkins: riiigghhhttt....
*several hours and one awesome fight later*
Jenkins: ohh my.....I think I need to see face maker caues Im sure my liver dosnt bend that way.....
DE: ONE TO TELEPORT!
Jenkins: Wait....he gets a teleporter for medical emergancies and I dont?
TWA(still un-agro'ed): Well hes kinda well.....
Jenkins: AND YOU DIDNT EVEN DO ANYTHING! YOU STOOD THERE THE ENTIRE BATTLE!
TWA: I was whatching the awesome kicka$$-ness of it all
Jenkins: I quit....heres my two weeks notice
*suddenly the group says "Wait...its a kill all mission"!*
Jenkins: Oh bloody hell......

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Manticore can't possibly have anything to do with Wyvern except maybe inspiring their theme.

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I don't know, he could have dropped them a little cash, under the table to avoid the IRS or something. Soft money donations and such, so he could only give them a little at at a time.

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Ture, but from one of the Radio's missions we know Longbow has no problem paying them. And Manticore most likely foots some of Longbows bills, so I don't see why he couldn't just pass the money through Longbow.

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I dont see why he couldn't pass the money on through but it seems like he is the backer of this organization. I mean despite the fact they are very Mercanary and by all apearances get paid oodles of cash for their services they still would have needed a initial footing of cash as well as some extra cash handy for the snazzy equipment they use. You dont just throw together afew thousand dollar, some mercs and a archery set or two and get what they are. They would have needed relitively large sums of money to purchase enough arrows/equipment/hideouts as well as train the troops.
The best reason I can come up with about Manticore not just paradeing around with a "I <3 teh Wyvren!" shirt is becaues they are supposed to be a slightly illeagal group of vigallantes and it certainly would not fly over well for the great heros and protectors of Paragon to be linked to thugs who preform un-sanctioned military acts in a forign country. I think it says somewere the reason longbow often hires them is becaues they are preforming acts longbow really isnt supposed to be caught doing.

Luddite: Go Limp!

and

Goldbricker (named boss): We want our sled back!

I found these both funny. The first one I have no Idea why though....<.< >.> The second one becaues well really why would some extravagently rich and powerful person want a sled?

Jenkins and the Gold Brickers

*Jenkins walks into a back ally. The sound of dice can be heard*

Jenkins: Ummm hello?

Boomer: Hey Jenkins! Cmon play some dice! The minimum bets only elevinty-bajillion bucks.

Jenkins: Well thats not it boss....Im kinda here to turn in my Jetpack and Sonic Rifle....

Boomer: Whaaaa? You mean and ditch all this great Sky high fun? And the choclate? and the amazing amounts of free cash and swag?

Jenkins: Well thats just it sir. Ever since I started work with you guys its been nothing but trouble. The Arachnos beacon you gave me was so big that I couldnt even walk with it.

Boomer: Ok so we wont give you the big loot anymore.

Jenkins: And I dont understand how to control this jet pack. Or this Sonic gun.

Boomer: Well you just ummmm.....Actually mines just always kinda worked....

Jenkins: And whats with all this choclate we eat? I mean really. We get a whole freakin POUND of choclate for 1 stupid arachnos helmet. I have like 5 that some random guy threw at me,

Boomer: Welllll......just listen. Come with me and the guys on one last run. were breakin into the 97th floor of the Cornstalk Palace Hotel

Jenkins: And whats with all these sky high capers? I mean half of us dont even know how to operate our jet packs and a quarter of us just get up there by going in the front door and walking upstairs.

Boomer: Look. We arnt some huge flashy group like the Hellions or the Skulls. We just get by on our minor resources.

Jenkins: MINOR! MINOR!?!?! Every rank of this group gets a free solid gold jet pack on entry. I mean the baisic equipment is worth more than all the pay checks from every group Ive been in since the Hellions.

Boomer: Look. If you really dont like this group this much go talk to Midas. Good luck finding him though. Hes so well hidden not even Lord Recluse could find him.

Jenkins: WELL HIDDEN?!?! The man paints himself gold. PAINTS.....HIMSELF.....GOLD....Infact there a candy factory named GOLD BRICKERS just on the opposite side of town!

Boomer: Yea yea yea....Wait do you hear that?

*A sudden assasins strike takes down the boomer. A 8 man team of villains 7 of then brutes look unusually happy to see Jenkins*

Brute1: Here we go! One last gold bricker for our Fort Knox badge!

Jenkins: Bloody hell.....

Brute2: SMASH!

I got to thinking (again). We dont know if the young man at the factory was the highest head on the totem pole. What if. WHAT IF the young man was a sort of heir apperant to the REAL clockwork king who really was a mad scientist and really WASNT maimed/killed by Blue Steel. If anyone has taken the time to think about it the clockwork in the rouge ilses shouldnt even be there. The mental pulse isnt strong enough. Who knows. What if the CK while he was human had a son? What if said son is possibly the CK in Paragon and the Father CK is in the Rouge Ilses? or viea versa?

Jenkins and the Legacy Chain!!!

*Jenkins walks into a office adorned with crosses and rune signs*
Jenkins: Umm Excuse me boss? Sir? Im here about my...
Adamant Pledge of Steel: OHHH! Jenkins my good brother! How are you today? Have you said your prayers yet?
J: Thats just it sir. Im not really cut out for this job.
APoS: Oh how so?
J: Well sir you see when I first saw the ad in tha paper for the job position of Aluminum Pledge of Steel I thought....
APoS: Ohhh right. We could promote you to Tinfoil? Wouldnt you like that Brother Jenkins? A nice tinfoil helemt to keep those pesky Circle of Thorns from reading our brains? OHHH! We could put some crosses on them and use the to keep the bad spirits away as well!
J: Ohhh Ohhh! I know we could add some nice pink lace and...WAIT WAIT WAIT! Im not here to participate in the weekend craft party Im here on more inportant bussiness!
APoS: .......
J: I want to turn in my two weeks notice. No one ever said that this was a Hero group. I thought this was a villain group! I wanted to be robbing banks and to be listening to groovy radios! Not standing around waiting for Lord Darkity Dark Dark of Darkness to find the unholy turnip and threaten our lives with it.
APoS: Brother Jenkins is this rage stemming from your lack of proper weapon? I could aquire you a stick wrapped in tinfoil instead of aluminum if you want.
J: And theres another thing! Whats with all the medival stuff and learning? Suits of armour? Flowing robes of silk? Broad Swords? No wonder we cant keep even the simple villains from getting their hands on our sacred artifacts! GOD! you guys are worse than that time I joined the Dominatrix's arm of the preatorians.....
APoS: Did you just use the lords name in vain brother Jenkins?
J: Ummmm maby?
APoS: Riiiiiggghhhtttt....
*APoS into a speakerphone*
APoS: Caroline? Yes. Cancle all my apointments for the rest of the day. I have a sinner to convert.....
*APoS hits a button and the door slams closed*
APoS: Time for conversion.....
*APoS pulls out a large branding iron. He also pulls out a cell phone*
APoS: Hey? Yea Dominatrix? Yes its me. Yea the whole good guy thing is working out. You know that scrawny guy with the J name? Yea the one who passed out when you brought out the clown and grizzly? That one. And now you remember that favor you owe me? Yea. Send over Arnoldo and Hanz. And the clown.
Jenkins: Bloody Hell.....


I apologize if this isnt correct Jenkins satire or if someone did a Legacy chain story already. I dont remeber one though.

I think that the reason he was still in his twenties yet cursed the engineeing establishment was a simple reason. He wanted to be a robotics engineer we can geuss. He has the latent clockwork mental mastery mutation. So I am geuss that he was trying to create a robot after graduateing robotics U or werever one goes to learn a great deal about robotics. He was so stressed out as his deadline neared his mental powers suddenly developed themselves with a tremendous power so large he was able to make his walking pile of junk work. He went ahead to show off said device. It was a hit and a line was made that began to produce these wonders of science. However the robots were soon found to be incapeable of operation at all or at certain ranges. The robots were quickly taken apart and examined. Results showed that there was no possibal way scientific or mechanical these contraption could work. The futuer CK was thrown out on his ear. He then began to develope his powers and thus began the reign of the clockwork king. Either that or some scientific robotic accident gave him his powers but then he would be classified as a Science origin AV instead of mutation.

And as to why the cartoonish construct reminicent of a fun little clockwork toy well what better robot to destroy advanceing robotic engineering than one that look like a toy soldier.

Oh and why everyone reminds him of Blue steel.....well..............ummm he got hit on the head by BS alot harder than he thought.....