In your thread - stealing your reviews.
By
BadJuJu,
Posted on: 2009-05-03 15:21 in Mission Architect
Originally from thread The Epics List
Arc: 75386 The Knights of Rularuu
I rated this * * * * * .
Fantastic story driven arc, with about the right level of challange for me.
The contact is the cocky Justice-Guy who opens with an awesome mock of Crimson and Indigo, and moves into an excellent story about the Shadow Shard (hardly a surprise given the title). The story contains some excellent funny bits, and some alternative lore I found fascinating.
In an effort to be critical - the actual help in the first mission is a bit out of place, but really that's nit picking.
Edit: Also the contact could have said "I'm Justice-Guy - you know?" in order to appease the Douglas Adams fan in me.
If you have any interest in the Shadow Shard - play this arc.
Arc 36492 : The Saga of Uuralur the Mirror.
Which appears to be the only arc containing Uuralur at the moment (and also appeared in the epic thread mentioned above).
I rated this * * *
Likes: The enemy group(s). Most of the story.
Dislikes: Throwing certain enemies into the mission just so there is an AV. The contact's powers. Could use more Uuralur background.
(Some minor spoilers below - but nothing that invalidates the arc IMO)
The arc puts you in touch with a Elder from the Shadow Shard. Elder Chris, this name could maybe use a little work i think. However his daughter has been stolen by Uuralur the Mirror, and so he leads you off on a merry dance between the powerful mystic factions in Paragon before an 'Epic Showdown' in the Shadow Shard. The contact's speech seemed a little odd, but not something I can put my finger on entirely and could be put down to being from an alternate dimension.
In mission 2 you go to intervene in a fight between the Reflections (including some nice custom enemies - which I'm wondering how you found enough space in your file for) and the Carnies. For no reason at all Giovana Scaldi is there. In her own bio it says Giovanna Scaldi died in 17th century Venice, it appears she is alive and well - in Vanessa DeVore's mind. Finding any Carnie AV at a random performance is lucky, finding a part of someone elses subconcious is just a bit too odd. Even the madame of mystery would have been more likely.
In mission 3 its the Banished Pantheon, and you have to imprison Adamastor so that the Reflections cannot. You activate "Adamastor's Prison" and - he is summoned. In an office. Again this just seemed like an AV for AV's sake in there.
Mission 4 is suitably epic, but it may be worth mentioning that Akarist is not a member of the CoT any more. Baphomet may fit better with mission 1. In this mission, Elder Chris, from the shadow shard - who has appeared pretty mystic thus far, is a Merc's mastermind. In a cave. Who keeps ringing someone as I walk around the map and making people parachute through rock. This didn't really fit with the theme.
Anyway - in short: A good arc for a team barney and with some polishing this arc could be pretty darn cool for everyone else too.
From the Arc Reviews 3 thread, TheMightyEmu posted this arc for review...
Name: Flatline
I rated this * * * *
Liked: The atmosphere. Short, the idea doesn't outstay itself.
Disliked: What happens on death. Slightly vague objectives (I forgive this to some extent due to the mystery nature of things).
In this mission you hear a call of distress from a Police Drone regarding someone being killed over and over. You leap to investgate. Inside you rapidly discover the teleporters have started to teleport you back to the same place when you try to leave or die. A nice idea and I was worried a little about dying in here.
A couple of thing's I'd try to do to improve this mission...
1: Key the Pod objectives from one of the other objectives - adds to a sense of uncovering the mystery instead of box ticking.
2: See if its possible to have the map work in a council base, I know its a radical change in concept - but the theme could remain the same and it would allow you medi-port to within the mission which for me would make it a 5*.
Originally from thread I'll review and rate
Arc: 163005 Rescue The Cabana Bois
By PDF29TAG
I rated this * .
This mission is probably a comedy mission. I say probably because only once was anything funny.
The mission gives no description of what or why, and the tasks in the mission are just repeats (31 total objectives, 10 Clickie, 10 Bois rescue, 10 Wired Cars and 1 other) that make no sense (I am destroying cars so they cannot?) and have no/very little comedy value that I can see. The non Bois rescue is an exception and made me laugh, and is the only reason this is not zero stars.
The custom enemies are pretty cool initially, but rapidly turn into a grind (mostly because of the number of identical objectives). Most things would improve this arc so I'm not going to try and point any options for improvement out.
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My word of the week is Arcanist.
I found
Burying the Dead
ID: 10263
By: @Boulevard
I rated this * * * * .
This mission (single mission again) was fairly bare bones - but did tick all the boxes (possibly in pencil). The contact had a good reason for asking you to go help take out her ebil sister, the zombie types in the mission looked pretty good and didn't have the default description. There were only a few objectives and they made sense. The story was not really anything to speak of, but I really enjoyed the final boss fight, and the mission was short enough to not need an epic story to grab my attention.
This is simply a good fun single missionwhere you get to have an epic battle and witness two sisters beat the tar out of each other, and feel like your presence is what is tipping the balance.
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Arc 36492 : The Saga of Uuralur the Mirror.
Which appears to be the only arc containing Uuralur at the moment (and also appeared in the epic thread mentioned above).
I rated this * * *
Likes: The enemy group(s). Most of the story.
Dislikes: Throwing certain enemies into the mission just so there is an AV. The contact's powers. Could use more Uuralur background.
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I really enjoy seeing how other reviewers rated something that I played in my thread. In this case I had the exact same rating for slightly different reasons. The author seemed to disagree with me in a slightly snarky way.
Edit to add: The reason I mention this is because when I played it the arc had a 5 star rating with a lot of plays and I second guessed myself on my rating....
Keep up the good work.
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I really enjoy seeing how other reviewers rated something that I played in my thread.
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Glad you enjoyed it. Glad you read it really - was starting to wonder if I was talking to myself. Like in real life... Anyhoo...
Originally from Scalding Reviews
Author: jwbullfrog (forum name)
Arc# 64142
Leave it, Badger
I rated this * * * *
Likes: Use of the word badger. The second incarnation of badger. The plot. Not too long.
Dislikes: Slightly 'unfinished' in parts. Insufficent use of mashed potatoes.
I'm pretty sure one of the stars in this is for using a character called Badger. I ran this on Basra Badger (Mercs/Poison MM). Sadly it wasn't Badger.
This arc was two missions long, and a light comedy/light story arc. Badger is a naughty boy, and the creator quickly and neatly gives the impression that he keeps getting to scrapes with villains, and you need to rescue him (for the cash if you are a villain).
Badger in the first mission has the default info text, in a mission of this style this is unforgivable! Also the clue from the first mission could do with a title as it looks untidy, or could just not exist - the speech does enough to tell you exactly what is going on.
Badger in the second mission has been abducted from a sci-fi convention by the Family. A little more could be done here, with chatter from the Family for example, or some custom family enemies (play it and you will know what I mean).
And there it ends, in a job well done. If the word badger amuses you, and it does if you are me.
So a short and amusing comedy arc, which needs some polish. And mashed potato.
Originally on Purple Lovin's highly sarcastic review pit
Title: Soldiers of Fortune
Arc ID: 4431
Creators Global Name: @Mekkanos
Level Range: 30-35
I rated this * * * * *
Likes: Custom Group, Contact, Allies, Plot, chatter, set pieces.
Dislikes: Lag? The final boss maybe, but that's just nit picking. Wordy.
Another one of those gigantic 5 mission arcs, which can sometimes be a pain to play because if they are awful I still cannot stop playing them in case they suddenly become great and I never know about it. This arc isn't one of those. It starts pretty cool, and continues in a fairly cool vein.
Mission 1 sees you perform a simple job for a payment of a magical artifact you should find on the scene (Villainous arc). In a rare shock the simple job is in fact, simple. Unfortunately your payment got nicked, and appears to be the target of two groups of merc's. The "Paradigm Company" and Sky Raiders.
This arc has you chasing your payment through 4 missions with the aid of your ever helpful and actually interesting contact. What he's up to is at least as interesting as your story in the missions, he also helps out by giving you some interesting allies to play with.
The story keeps going right up until after the end of mission 5 (yes the final contact speech is more than a well done, pat) and stays interesting througout.
Any down sides? A bit, but only a bit.
There was quite a bit of lag, but I'm blaming that on a nearby baby monitor interfering with the Wi-Fi rather than the author.
There was a lot to read in the chatter and the contact, and in a few of the clues, but its worth reading so fully excusable.
The final EB/AV was a little unnessesary plot wise given what it was all about, but looked cool (though I did find the PC bosses a harder fight), and didn't have fire armor (which would have had me tearing my hair out as I just cannot kill fire armor EB's). Things like the AV in there should exist as bosses/eb's in that faction in canon, so again even this negative is a positive. Maybe scale him down in the arc to EB level?
In short if the "Devs Choice: For Your Consideration" thread actually existed I'd post in there. Go play it. Shoo.
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Originally on Purple Lovin's highly sarcastic review pit
Title: Soldiers of Fortune
Arc ID: 4431
Creators Global Name: @Mekkanos
Level Range: 30-35
I rated this * * * * *
Likes: Custom Group, Contact, Allies, Plot, chatter, set pieces.
Dislikes: Lag? The final boss maybe, but that's just nit picking. Wordy.
Another one of those gigantic 5 mission arcs, which can sometimes be a pain to play because if they are awful I still cannot stop playing them in case they suddenly become great and I never know about it. This arc isn't one of those. It starts pretty cool, and continues in a fairly cool vein.
Mission 1 sees you perform a simple job for a payment of a magical artifact you should find on the scene (Villainous arc). In a rare shock the simple job is in fact, simple. Unfortunately your payment got nicked, and appears to be the target of two groups of merc's. The "Paradigm Company" and Sky Raiders.
This arc has you chasing your payment through 4 missions with the aid of your ever helpful and actually interesting contact. What he's up to is at least as interesting as your story in the missions, he also helps out by giving you some interesting allies to play with.
The story keeps going right up until after the end of mission 5 (yes the final contact speech is more than a well done, pat) and stays interesting througout.
Any down sides? A bit, but only a bit.
There was quite a bit of lag, but I'm blaming that on a nearby baby monitor interfering with the Wi-Fi rather than the author.
There was a lot to read in the chatter and the contact, and in a few of the clues, but its worth reading so fully excusable.
The final EB/AV was a little unnessesary plot wise given what it was all about, but looked cool (though I did find the PC bosses a harder fight), and didn't have fire armor (which would have had me tearing my hair out as I just cannot kill fire armor EB's). Things like the AV in there should exist as bosses/eb's in that faction in canon, so again even this negative is a positive. Maybe scale him down in the arc to EB level?
In short if the "Devs Choice: For Your Consideration" thread actually existed I'd post in there. Go play it. Shoo.
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Thanks for playing my arc! I'm glad you liked it that much! Now to address your points....
1) Lag: I haven't had any complaints about lag regarding the arc, although the custom critters might cause some. The baby monitor interfering with the Wi-Fi sounds like a likely suspect as well.
2) Wordiness: Yeah, I suppose that's a problem I have with my writing style in general. I've done what I can to curb it, but I can't think of much in the arc that I could condense down without detracting from the story. I'm glad you thought the wordiness was worth it, though.
3) The final boss: (Being purposely vague about his identity) Perhaps he was unnecessary but I wanted his group to show up one last time to clarify their role in the story and I didn't think a simple boss from the faction would make a very good send-off to the arc. I originally wanted the leader of the group to show up instead, but his level range is sadly above the one for the arc. In the interest of making a satisfying conclusion, I decided to make the final enemy a tough one. I don't know if I want to make him into an EB, though, especially considering he's supposed to be one of the top members of the group (His rank implies as much).
Anyway, thanks again for playing my arc and I'm honored that you think it's worth Dev's Choice!
My arcs:
Title: Blitzkrieg
Arc ID: 3416
Title: Soldiers of Fortune
Arc ID: 4431
Title: The Rikti Accession
Arc ID: 278757
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I really enjoy seeing how other reviewers rated something that I played in my thread.
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Glad you enjoyed it. Glad you read it really - was starting to wonder if I was talking to myself. Like in real life... Anyhoo...
Originally from Scalding Reviews
Author: jwbullfrog (forum name)
Arc# 64142
Leave it, Badger
I rated this * * * *
Likes: Use of the word badger. The second incarnation of badger. The plot. Not too long.
Dislikes: Slightly 'unfinished' in parts. Insufficent use of mashed potatoes.
I'm pretty sure one of the stars in this is for using a character called Badger. I ran this on Basra Badger (Mercs/Poison MM). Sadly it wasn't Badger.
This arc was two missions long, and a light comedy/light story arc. Badger is a naughty boy, and the creator quickly and neatly gives the impression that he keeps getting to scrapes with villains, and you need to rescue him (for the cash if you are a villain).
Badger in the first mission has the default info text, in a mission of this style this is unforgivable! Also the clue from the first mission could do with a title as it looks untidy, or could just not exist - the speech does enough to tell you exactly what is going on.
Badger in the second mission has been abducted from a sci-fi convention by the Family. A little more could be done here, with chatter from the Family for example, or some custom family enemies (play it and you will know what I mean).
And there it ends, in a job well done. If the word badger amuses you, and it does if you are me.
So a short and amusing comedy arc, which needs some polish. And mashed potato.
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So, how exactly would I work the potatoes in? I admit its a bit rough. Upgrades are coming... (all together now)... soon.
Writer of In-Game fiction: Just Completed: My Summer Vacation. My older things are now being archived at Fanfiction.net http://www.fanfiction.net/~jwbullfrog until I come up with a better solution.
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So, how exactly would I work the potatoes in?
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I can't tell you everything! 
Maybe a packet of instant mash in a crate ... just for me?
Another of my word of the week arcs...
Author: @Oscurus
Arc ID: 18123
A Grave Concern
I rated this * * * *
Though I think I may have been a bit generous with that last star.
Good points: Humour, passable plot, fast missions (except the first one).
Bad Points: A defeat all (I was definitely generous with that last star), bad spelling, a fire armor elite boss, parts of the plot were hard to follow (and I wrote Entrused with the Other Secret!).
A guy named Aphaeton claims to be an "arhivist" for "the Midnight Squadron"; as it's AE I'll assume this is a new group with similar objectives to the Midnight Squad. An artefact has awakened and he wants you to check it out. In there are some 5th column in a lab for some reason where you must "Secure the location", which turns out to be a defeat all. I was too generous with that star. Defeat alls (in my opinion) need a startling good reason to exist - and also need to be clearly stated. Unfortunately I'd slept between giving my rating and doing the first mission, so that lucky Oscurus got an extra star out of me here.
Anyway - it's half way through this mission, I suddenly realise I should stop reviewing it as a serious arc. It's actually funny. I'm not 100% sure if it's all intentional, but I did let out a laugh on reading the clue from the Temporal Regulator.
Mission 2 is fast, as is mission 3, and the funny just keeps sneaking in there just when you think it's gone. It's somewhere in this mission that the 5th column start talking about being in limbo and I start to wonder what is going on with that (answers on a postcard). In mission 4 you face the big boss, who is a Fire Armor EB, and thus entirely unkillable by my fire blaster. I luckily managed to get help and took him down.
Mission 5 is a bit of a let down, and doesn't have any of the humour of the previous missions, and the ancient arc being in big metal tube was a little strange (the clue did explain it, but I'm sure there are better models than that one).
This arc could really use the author playing it through again to iron out those little kinks (and the boat load of mis-spellings), and maybe having a look at mission 5 - it needs some extra funk.
Anyway in short a moderately good arc, lifted by some unexpected comedy.
Also...
I re-rated this * * * because I remembered the mission 1 defeat all.
Arc Orginally in I'll Review and Rate
To Slay Sleeping Dragons.
Author @DLancer
Arc ID: 111486
I rated this * * *
Good points: Fast Paced.
Bad Points: Didn't care enough about the outcome. Seemed like a character showcase mission.
Possibly spolers ahead, but really the plot of this arc isn't going to blow you away anyway.
This arc is an assassination arc, and your target a pesky hero called Azure Song - who gains her powers by being infused with dragon-y soul goodness. Malaketh want's her dead for no eaisly discernable reason (Malaketh even has in his info text that his nemesis isn't Azure Song), so sends you to collect the ancient tome of dragon removal. This mission is really short find the glowie mission with an optional fight with Azure Song.
Next, another Dragon powered individual (Neithlium) is lured to fight your original dragon powered person in a 3 way barney (you being the third) with some reasonably cool, if identical looking, custom mobs. After taking those both down.
You finally get to put the smack down on dragon itself instead of its Azure Song shaped host, in a really cool map. Then you find it was all for nothing as either Malaketh stuffed up the ritual (his own fault for being a technology villain trying to defeat a magic hero with magic), or because it was a faulty ritual in the first place.
The End.
This arc is fine if you like "go there - punch that" missions but for me there was simply no hook. Maybe add a first mission where Azure Song foils Malaketh's plan so at least someone in the arc cares if she's dead?
The two dragons and the contact all seemed like the players own characters (or ones from their SG) which probably means that for the Author there is that reason to care, in all the back story these guys no doubt have. For people coming to the arc fresh this doesn't exist so, for me at least, it fell flat.
I'm rating this 3 stars because it didn't do anything wrong, but it didn't do enough to push it any higher.
In short a short, simple, arc. If you like punching dragon powered women - this is the arc for you. Otherwise, probably not.
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So, how exactly would I work the potatoes in?
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I can't tell you everything! Maybe a packet of instant mash in a crate ... just for me?
GAH! Thats exactly what I had decided on. Curse you for your rapid cleverness..
Writer of In-Game fiction: Just Completed: My Summer Vacation. My older things are now being archived at Fanfiction.net http://www.fanfiction.net/~jwbullfrog until I come up with a better solution.
Ok gang. Time for a bit of Quid pro Quo on this thread.
Arc # 61748 "A Deal with Destiny"
This is a good arc for starting off with. If you feel like skipping your first 5 missions or so in Ap or Galaxy or Mercy, give this one a try.
The baddies are our old friends the Hellions. It seems that they've been getting more powerful and agressive recently and you need to find out why.
I like the writing across all five missions. The plot was solid and did have me wanting to know what happens next. The clues you find in each mission are useful and give small hints to whats coming up.
The combats are well balanced. I did this as part of a two player team (mind/emp 'troller + SS/inv tank both lv 10.) The whole arc ran smoothly until we aggroed two mobs at once (oops, our bad.) An AV does show up in the last mission but the description warns you of this and is kind enough to tell you that it's not needed to complete. I like that.
Ticket wise I netted about 950 while my partner got about 1100. Not a bad haul I'd say.
I gave the arc 5 stars for a good story, clear writing, nice use of clues, and amusing dialogue.
There was only one flaw I could find and that was minor. In mission one the final boss still uses "$player" in the dialogue. A small fix there and i think you have something suitable for canon use.
No potatoes were used in the production of this review.
Writer of In-Game fiction: Just Completed: My Summer Vacation. My older things are now being archived at Fanfiction.net http://www.fanfiction.net/~jwbullfrog until I come up with a better solution.
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Ok gang. Time for a bit of Quid pro Quo on this thread.
...
I gave the arc 5 stars for a good story, clear writing, nice use of clues, and amusing dialogue.
In mission one the final boss still uses "$player" in the dialogue.
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Thanks for playing my arc, and very glad you enjoyed it. As for the $player thing are you sure your teammate wasn't called "Splayer" 
? I replayed mission 1 and couldn't get this to happen.
Now one of the word of the week arcs which just appeared on the scene.
5th Column Barnyard Beatdown
@Eternal Arcanist
Arc ID: 175440
1 Mission
I rated this * *
This arc claims to be "A classic old school, viceral beat 'em up." so at least it doesn't have any delusions of grandeur. My review is already about as long as all the text in the entire arc.
A 5th Column robot wants you to come to a 5th column base for a fight. You do, there is, the end. Sadly the fight you have isnt with the robot who asks you to come, and there is no flavor at all in the mission (clues or chatter) and it's a defeat all. As it was short and the description didn't lead me to expect anything else, it get to have a second star.
This arc was probably (hopefully) someone trying out the publish and I just happened to search for it at the time!
In short cut down paper mission, with a defeat all.
Originally posted in Reviews for Short arcs.
Arc Name: Zero Entertainment
Arc ID: 44824
Creator Global/Forum Name: BungeeBall
I rated this * * * *
Good: Final Fight, Comedy.
Bad: So much going on in final room you lose a lot of the text. Up to the final room it's a little easy.
This arc is a game within a game within a game. That's correct: Dj Zero has created a virtual entertainment park where you can fight the battles of your dreams with one simple pill. Something I would have thought eaiser to do using, say, virtual reality; and more Dr. Aeon's bag than DJ Zero's...
As you can probably tell realism isn't this arc's selling point.
This single mission arc is a run through of COH's most famous characters. BaB, Statesman, Synapse, Citadel, Manti' and Sister Psyche on your side; Recluse, Mako, Ice Mistral, Black Scorpion, Arbiter Sands(?), Silver Mantis and Requiem on the other. I may have missed one or two.
BaB carped it against Lord Recluse; but soon I had States, Manti, Synapse and Psyche and I was mowing my way through the enemy. This arc was heading for a low score thanks to making me feel like a bit part.
But then I got into the last room, suddenly I'm fighting 4 AVs at once and it's all going nuts. Psyche goes down to Arbiter Sands, Statesman gets stuck in a railing and is shot to bits by Black Scorpion and Silver Mantis, I manage to take down Ice Mistral, and finish off Silver Mantis. By the time I fight Requiem it's only me and Manticore left and we finish him off. Great epic fight.
You then get a Group Photo of your success - somehow they took a photo of my pill fueled delusion; well done them.
Every rescue and fight has it's own bit of comedy dialogue. Some of it isn't funny, some of it is. Some of it's lost in the final fight and only noticed if you look through the chat log. Citadel's binary inactive text is sadly cut short (01100001 01110000 needs adding at the end I think? If not enough space in there maybe remove the binary spaces.)
This arc lives and dies by its final epic battle, some different spawning or other randomness could make this not happen; so the arc may be much worse if played again.
In short a comic yet epic battle between good and evil, in a sewer, in your head, in a game, in a game.
(Edit to add where originally posted)
Originally posted in I'll review and rate
Title: Rapp'Mas'Ta's War
Author: @El Spark
Arc ID: 8121
Morality: Heroic
I rated this * * *
Good: Contact, Some comedy chatter.
Bad: Lack of noise freaks early on, odd first couple of missions, gives the game away in the description.
I would warn about spoilers in this review but most of the spoilers are on the Arc's own search page.The arc description is "Rikti Scientists are attempting to incorporate sonic attacks into their arsenals...". You, however, spend the first couple of missions trying to work this out. This removes any kind of surprise or smug glow you may have felt working this out for yourself before the contact.
The contact is The Dark Watcher, and his dialogue is informative and in character - one of the better parts of this arc. The first part of this arc takes place in St Martial against the wailers, an odd first choice for the rikti as the wailers use mystic powers to do this, on the other hand the Rikti fail here so that makes sense in that way. Also the map used is boomtown, but a st martial map is available at Unique - Outdoor - St Martial (may require an unlock however). The contact then sends you to take some recovered tech to a weapons expert contact, but his office has been overrun by Freaks - who seem to want to know why the rikti attacked them. I want to know why they are asking a weapons expert about why they were attacked by Rikti. Just seems like too big a coincidence.
The Rikti are trying to learn how to utilise sonic technology from the Freakshow - which again seems a bit strange to me as they had it given to them by a council turncoat. Especially as none of the freaks up until the end of mission 4 have any sonic powers; a few noise tanks dotted around in mission 2 would be good, and no noise tanks in the mission 3 "Noise Tank nest" is really odd. These bosses would also allow the author to utilise one of their skills - comedy dialogue.
Some of the freaks and rikti do have some good and funny dialogue - especially if you know your tunes.
Mission 4 is pretty good, but for an arc focusing on Rikti incorporating sonic attacks into their arsenal a surprising lack of sonic in the final mission (not sure how to fix that without some custom mob - someone had some decent rikti costume models on the board a while back).
In short an interesting story with some funny elements, let down by simultaneously giving the mystery away and not having enough pointers to it.
My word of the week is, Regal.
Under Locke and Key
By @Lord of the Highland
Morality: Heroic
Countess Crey has a history of getting her regal fingers into things she shouldn't.
I rated this * * * *
Good: The missions, the AV combat, much of the plot.
Bad: Some indecipherable contact text, warning-less timed mission, overpowered ally, no info text on any of the custom mobs, wall of contact text, AV's/Mission Objectives appearing with no good reason.
Warning - contains some spoilers.
Your contact here is Manticore, who seems to have a lot more waffle to him than in his task force. He also seems to have gained a deathly fear of paragraphs, which makes him either a paragraphaphobe or walloftextaphile. Either way reading his ramblings can be headache. Sadly if you do not read them, one of the best bits of the arc will pass you by - it's good plot.
New Paragraph. The plot starts with you picking up some files Manticore thinks may indicate a new era in their Revenant Hero project. Inside you find the files and Scorpios, those scorpion crey guys from Black Scorpions arc. You defeat the swathes of scorpio , and their ebil but silent master Scorpio Agent (who has no tail, or bio text, and appears to be a paragon protector - could there have been a better choice here?). The scorpio agents are then forgotten and never spoke of again. Fun to fight though.
New Paragraph. Mission 2 probably should have been mission 1 as the plot in this mission actually bears some relevance to the rest of the arc, and where you meet up with Dr Occipitus - your recurring AV for the arc thanks to his astal (sic) projection capabilities. Also the freaks get involved. Mission 3 is in many ways a repeat of mission 2 but is, again, fun. Here you rescue Drs Roseman and Newcombe, who somehow burrow into Manticore's mind and cause him to insert technobabble into his unpunctuated speeches.
New Paragraph. Mission 4 is timed and at only 15:00 I was taken aback when I came back to find it down at 9:00 after reading some stuff on the forum during the loading screen. With an AV to fight, and a rescue to perform (and not a bad rescue too) I was shocked to find that another 8 objectives appeared. Somehow I managed to complete the mission, I'm not sure I was meant to as the end of mission text boils down to "there was another boat". Again it was great fun running around the map, and trying to get it all done in time, gets the pulse going.
New Paragraph. The pre-mission 5 text is, frankly, indecipherable and, given that the last mission is very fail-able, some of it is likely to be wrong. If you do not defeat the AV at the back of the boat the plot falls down a big hole. It also throws in another AV, the previously unmentioned mentor of Dr O the recurring (and bio-text-less), and yet another villain who nobody knows anything about. You are told you are going to have 2 allies in there. The first ally is the massively powerful Solar Flare, and the second (described as a sidekick - an AV/EB sidekick) may as well say "S you guys - I'm going home" (warning link may deemed be offensive, and should therefore not be viewed by anyone). Which is probably just as well as there is a fair chance that Solar Flare could solo the map, including the 3 AVs. Needless to say the battle was won, the day was saved, and the crowd went wild. Crey then denied it all.
New Paragraph. The final exit chatter from Manticore explains a lot of the arc, but this could be done so much better by info text. This arc good has twists and turns, but is let down by painful contact writing - which is where nearly all of the plot is disseminated. The fun AV fights and well designed missions, push it up from a three star it would otherwise have had. This arc would definitely make five stars if... 1: Bio text on custom mobs 2: Some paragraphing was used. 3: The final mission intro text was cleaned up.
In short a fine arc, for the fights and story, but let down by the contact text.
Venture's Reviews II:
Dr. Dave and the Copper Legion
Author: @theHedoren
Morality: Heroic
ID: 60280
I rated this arc * * *
Good: Well written contact, interesting mobs to fight - when I was allowed, Music.
Bad: Overpowered allies, "familiar" plot, left field ending.
Contains Spoilers.
This arc has one really great idea, the music. I considered this for moment myself but then decided I have all the musical talent of a tone deaf sea urchin. The author however does appear to have some skill in this area. There is one piece of music, which sadly isn't long enough to cover the entire arc. If @theHedoren has the time and will, sticking a link to a separate piece of music at the start pop-up of each mission (its copy and paste-able there) could make something really special. Onto the plot...
This arc has you working for meandering Dr Dave Diaz of the SAC Academy of Heroes who is a midnighter. He lost his sidekick/bit of stuff/super heroine in Cimerora and wants you to get her back for him. Apparently he's looking somewhere else at the time for her too - not he gets the not a lazy contact award. This mission says its a prelude, and its not wrong. You find her and get her out, not that she needed any help, tearing up those poor defenceless traitors on her way out. At the exit she tells you she has a lead on an army of metal men created by a god as part of deal...
Mission 2 has you looking for clues to the location of the "Copper Legion" that the circle have somehow (?) got their hands on. After looking for some books - their librarian has the clue you need - their current location, and the information that someone else was already looking for that info.
Mission 3 is where it starts to get really "familiar". The midnighter club is attacked by some men in green armor, you need to help Heather Glass (from mission 1) and kick all of them out. Its a defeat all - but it's fast, thanks to the aforementioned Ms Glass breaking them apart like cold toffee with a hammer. You also have to get some tablets that they were trying to steal. It turns out those tablets describe how to take control of the army, but require a "powerful magician" and a mystic doo-dad that you aint got. Where could it be, if only you knew a location nearby that the legion were related to...
Oh those men in green are the copper legion - but gone off a bit like copper is want to do when kept in the past/alternate world for a while gathering dust. They are a lot like the traitors, but a custom group, their boss type (EM/Inv?) is 'Praefectus Aureum' which roughly translates to Golden Leader. So we have a mindless metal army (a bit golden) under unknown control, that can have its control wrestled away from it if you have the right stuff (sound familiar?).
Mission 4 has you help defend steel canyon from the copper legion after they mount a city wide attack. There is an army of longbow ready to take the place as soon as you can get the civvies out. A guy named Pyralis is there too, who again can cleave his way through the mobs like a hot Energy Blast through copper. He lets you know that there is some external force controlling the army, and if it goes they will likely stop.
Mission 5 has you remember about the location that helpful Circle librarian gave you. Dr Dave and Ms Glass will help too - in their hero personas, which is a nice touch as they have been in plain clothes up until now. You have to do some mystic-mumbo jumbo (their words not mine) to break the link to the outside world, and draw out the real enemy. Yes the group that has been planning this whole mystical assault on Paragon City is none other than that famous magical group - Malta??!?!? and their "shape changing" AV Moment (not previously even hinted at). By shape changing I mean a Sirocco respray, only his new bio gives any indication of that power.
Anyway - I killed about 4 mobs on this map; after rescuing the two heroes I realised my character would be surplus to requirements if the NPC's could click the glowies. Even the AV at the end and his squillion ambushes didnt stand a chance against those two. Playing the last mission in this arc is much like watching a film, say a fantasy-action film with a supposedly indestructible army of shiny robots. After moment falls over you get the mystic doo-dad and the army will never trouble anyone ever again.
In short a well written arc, with music - sadly with the allies its too easy to be a fun challange, and the plot too familiar for that to carry it to excellence.
NB: in case an author wants details of spelling mistakes etc in their arc I've reviewed. I may well have them all saved so just PM me about it.
Reflection of Spirit
Author: @Radionuclide
Arc ID: 66477
Originally posted in I'll review and rate
I rated this arc * * *
Good Stuff: Good plot idea, interesting story, short missions.
Bad Stuff: The plot stalls for a while in the middle. A couple of allies/rescue mobs I didn't understand the reason for. Nothing custom in there. No AV note in the description.
In this arc Mirror spirt has had an associate taken hostage by the Tsoo and isn't sure who to trust so keeps their identity, and some other things, a secret until she knows she can trust you more. Mirrors Spirit's dialogue is reasonably well written, gets the point across, and does make you want to know more - for a while...
Missions 2-4 are fairly identical, and short. Get a clue, beat a boss. These clues take you nearer the hostage so you can rescue them. My main criticsm of the arc is that (any) two of these missions do not add a lot to the story. One mission at least can be safely dropped, and another improved (e.g. more clues on the hostage taking, explanation of the Tsoo's reason for moving the hostage).
The main theme (and hook) of the arc is that you are impersonating Mirror Spirit; a good idea especially given her normal in game info ("the ability to utilize the power of other heroes") - and well executed by the author. The NPC's act like you are Mirror Spirit, and the reasons for it all add up by the end.
Mission 5 has you rescue the hostage, who for some reason that really doesnt add up with any of the rest of the arc - is Kim Kellerman. Given the lack of any other custom mobs in the mission I'm sure something could be done here within the filespace. Even just changing the info text on the model would go a long way to stop head scratching. I'm also still trying to figure out why Penelope Yin was in the first mission - other than it was in Faultline.
This arc is a lot like an early dev written arc. Good start and end, but the middle is a bit of a grind (not a lot of a grind - thanks to the short missions). Adding a few custom Tsoo mobs could have meant that the arc felt less like a standard one, and more like something special. If there ever was a faction that it's easy to have custom mobs added to it's the tsoo.
In short an arc with a good idea - that needs a bit of polish and either a challange through the middle, or a faster paced plot.
Thanks for your review! While I'm disappointed at the number of sticking points you had, I'm always glad to have honest feedback.
Coincidentally, I made a few text changes between when you wrote your review and when I found this thread. Granted, they're not major changes. Just little things, like the book-keeper's Clue containing more detail about the legion's location and the identity of the final enemy.
As far as Allies go, I've been struggling for a while to find some sort of balance, especially in the AV fight. I felt that the story demanded for them to be there, but I definitely don't want a non-interactive experience for the player. Perhaps some more tweaking is in order.
I must admit, it never occurred to me to write music for each mission individually. I'm still an amateur hobbyist, and composing actual score is something I haven't attempted yet. But now the idea is in my head, and I'll have to try it and see what happens!
Thanks again for your feedback!
Rise of the Copper Legion (#60280; with soundtrack)
The Fractured Dreamer (#498588; with musical theme)
"Now Leaving: Paragon City": original composition for the end of CoH
[ QUOTE ]
I made a few text changes
[/ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Perhaps some more tweaking is in order.
[/ QUOTE ]
Let me know if you do make some changes to the allies, I'll give it a re-run and re-rate it accordingly.
[ QUOTE ]
write music for each mission individually
[/ QUOTE ]
If you do do this; even for another arc - let me know. I'll very gladly give it a test run.
And now one from my word of the week (I'll finish the Regal's before moving on).
The Regal
Author: @Baron Violent
Morality: Neutral
ID: 45442
I rated this arc * * * *
Good: Interesting custom Mobs, short missions, a challange.
Bad: Bare bones plot, one defeat all.
This arc sums itself up in its own description "Descend into the caves and destroy the entity know as "The Regal"" pretty nicely.
What it doesn't mention there is that The Regal, or Reg as he shall now be known, has a posse of inky black shapeshifting memory stealing wormlike minions. These 'Mimics' look pretty cool (all black versions of common hero costumes) and are a challange - especially those pesky 'Strikers'. These little black guys are the stars of the show, and the reason it got a 4 star rating as opposed to the 2 or 1 * it could have got had it relied on its plot.
The plot is really simple, it doesn't even say if Reg is an alien, demon or some mutant. The fact the Hardcase is investigating (by 'investigating' I mean flings you in the direction of where someone last saw Mimics) points to Demonic but it all works either way. They are trying to capture psychics to do something that would somehow allow them to "enslave all of humanity", Reg was probably going to work out how once he had them. So you beat him and top level of worms down. The End! There is a defeat all in mission 1 but it's short and the mobs were fun to fight so I let it get away without losing a star there.
So in short a fun challenging fight against a varied foe, against a paper thin plot
Originally posted in The Sequels : 2-3 Missions Only Arc Reviews
The Internet is for Crime
Author: BadJuJu (Aka @DK242-B)
ID: 53385
I rated this arc * * *
Good: Funny in places, 'contact' text well written.
Bad: Mediocre and long(ish) middle mission, maybe a bit too much like the TV arc.
The contact for this arc is the Computer. The description for this arc was "Listen to the computer. The computer is your friend." so I was hoping for the Paranoia Computer. I was disappointed (though I was called a Commie at one point so that helped) when I found that the contact was a Computer, in a similar way to the Television or Radio.
The writing style is a lot like the style used by the Television, and that is no bad thing. It has you reading a blog that tells you about problems going on in the world. Problems from the point of view of Computer. One such 'problem' is a raid on a set of computer pirates. This mission is eaisly the best, with most of the most amusing elements found here. It also pokes fun simultaeneously at the pirates and RIAA, and starts to look like some good social satire.
Mission 2 is drag. It's the most 'serious' mission, and has some nice custom mobs in it. Sadly this mission falls right into the middle ground. It isn't funny enough to get any marks that way, it's not hard enough to get any marks for challange, there is no 'in mission' story and it has a fair number of objectives on an outdoor map. The contact's lead up to the mission is pretty good, but other than that - I'd remove it.
Mission 3 gets back into the swing of things, having a very funny lead up (well to me anyway) - and the boss in mission is also quite funny (though does anyone get the reference of "Taste vanilla rain!" in relation to computing, or ice). Sadly he's the only speaking role in the final mission, and it feels a little empty other than him.
This arc was very close to getting 4 *'s, entirely removing mission 2 would certainly have done it as would have a little more going on in mission 3. There is great potential here, I may well be keeping a look out for more @DK242-B arcs.
In short an amusing arc (especially if you liked the TV), that simply needs a boost in the middle to make it a very good arc indeed.
Hi parkin,
Thank you very much for the review. Just wanted to address the big critiscms in your review.
First, Penelope Yin being in the first mission. When I first planned the arc she was going to have a bigger role but, I decided to scale that line back until it was removed completely. I left her in the first mission because it is in faultine and she is pychic. I could not imagine she didn't know about the hostage being taken. I debated wrapping her up in the last mission by including a Psychic Clockwork ally that she had sent. But, really she is a remnent of a changed storyline. Something I will have to think about. I may just let her go
The Kim Kellerman thing. To be blunt, there isn't a Mirror Spirit in the MA. So, I picked a female NPC for her to "reflect" (read look like to be less conspicuous). I will add to her dialogue to address this.
As for the length, I agree with you now that you pointed it out.
Thank you again for the review. Excellent feedback to polish it.
--Rad
/whereami:
I've started this thread as I've made a habit of going into other review threads, waiting until they admit the have too many reviews to handle then pouncing like a stoat. Reviewing with wild abandon left, right, and centre.
One of them asked me to make a seperate review thread. So I am.
If you want your arc reviewing here - post a request in someone else's thread... Alternatively include my word of the week in your arc's searchable area. This week's word is...
Uuralur (because I'm going to write an arc including him and want background).
Ok - so onto the reviews...