What HEROES are Saying about The Sly Fox




"Look, all I know is, Sly Fox is gonna get his *** whooped. I mean, Yankee Daring is gonna KILL him. It’s bad enough that crazy drunken bast*rd has that d*mn Statesman complex, now that they’re doing this piece on Sly Fox, Yankee has one more hero to hate. He’s stealing his SPOTLIGHT, ya know? I mean, don’t get me wrong, I hate that inebriated son-of-a-b— oh… Hi… Yankee… I was just---“
< We are experiencing Technical Difficulties. We’ll Be Right Back! >
--The Late Sgt. Canary, Rest In Pieces

“Yo-daddy-o, Sly man, he knows his groove, ya dig? He one fine cat, I mean fox! He FOXXY! Yeah… but he steal didn’t give me a dollah. Hey, you got a dollah?”
--The Broke Beatnik

“Ace and I love Sly. And I do mean LOVE! …What? Why is everyone looking at me like that…? Anyway, even though he never comes over to our pad to play twister, he still always sends his regrets. Plus, he was kind enough to offer his services as our PR Representative. It may be expensive, but with our new image it’s worth every penny. He even designed our roadster for us. He said cars that look like a long, hot rocket are IN. That’s right, no one’s looking at Ace and me funny now, right? …What?”
--Gary, of “The Duo”

--The Tick

“I teach Sly Fox many things. I not teach him how to unclasp lady’s bra, though. He learn all by himself!”
--Yu Won, Master Sensei

“You want to know about The Sly Fox? He embodies all that is good and right in the world. A “paragon,” if you will, of all the heroes who have come and gone. After watching him in action, I wake up in the morning with a light heart and general feeling of nausea, but that’s only because my stomach doesn’t handle those snail thingys that the French eat. What has that got to do with anything? You tell me chum, YOU… TELL… ME!”
--The Tick

“Oh yes… Sly Fox is my kind of man. He reminds me everyday why I hate men.”
--Lucky Lesbian

“Hssssssssshhhhhh… Sly… Fooooxxxxxxx… took my… breath mask… won’t give back… says I need to… learn to breath… hhssssshh… on my own… Need… lawyer…”
--Asthmatic Avenger

“When I recall the origin of Sly Fox, and what it means to all us heroes out there, I’m reminded that if you are looking to make your mark with an original name and attitude, just look to good old Sly. He’s the perfect example of what road not to take.”
--Infinitum, Alien Hero from Xixijiz

“HA! Sly Fox and I had some mad dog times, I’m telling you. We would raid the farm every spring, and laugh and laugh. Old farmer McGregor would chase us through the henhouse, but good old Sly always knew how to out think him! You know, people said we were the original odd couple! Man, good old Sly”**
--The Hound (now retired and living at “Shady Hill Hero Retirement Community”)
**note: The Sly Fox has denied any knowledge of The Hound or anything he, quote “spews from his drooling, lagging maw”

“He stole my name! I told the crafty weasel I was gonna call myself the Sly Fox, and he went and reserved my name at the hero registry! The only thing that wasn’t taken was THIS!! That Darn Sly Fox!”
--Pink Tutu

“He solved the Anselmo Peterascky case… but the punk got away. If only Sly had thought to not give the guy that key to his handcuffs. And the map to our base. And that list of who was on guard duty that night and where we would be. And the security codes to the system. Ah well, no one’s perfect right? At least Sly got paid before the crook broke out. Plus, that wonderful Fox has offered to catch Anselmo for us again! And he even offered to give us a discount this time! What a guy!”
--The Believer, Member of The League of Gullible Gents

“I was on a team with Sly last year. That is, he told me it was a team, and that the 'T’ in team really meant 'two.' Regardless, the mission we were on certainly was interesting. What was that again? Oh yeah, 'Stop Empty Penthouse from being Ransacked by Clockwork while Owner Was Away but Do Not Tell Anyone and Wear Something Sexy.' You know, looking back on it now, he sure pulled the wool over my eyes! And my dress too…”
--Lady Bombshell

“All he did was praise me. Everywhere I went, he was bowing and scraping. FINALLY I yelled at him to beat it. It wasn’t until I was in the sewer that I discovered my utility belt was missing. I found it on the Pawn Shop a week later. I had to BUY it back! Can you believe that? He had even scratched my name out so I couldn’t prove it was mine! But you know, after all that, Fox was just so clever, I just gotta say… IF I EVER SEE THAT RED MUT AGAIN I WILL KILL HIM!!”
--Trevor Watchful the Un-Violent

“Have you ever seen a hero with Illusion Powers and Storm Summoning never once lift a finger during a fight, and then somehow walk away on the backs of the citizens with all your influence and a sly grin on is face? No? Ah… here’s Sly Fox’s pager number. Give him a call, kay?”
--Bitter Boy

“He’s really not such a bad guy. Ladies, get to know him!”
--The Anonymous Hero, Battle Cry: ‘Trust me I’m not the Sly Fox. I mean it! Honestly!’



"Sly, Sly, Sly... what can I say? You're underhanded, morally depraved, and about as shifty as they come. In fact, I remember our last encounter. How's the limp?"
--Frost Girl

"You have to understand something about the Fox. He may seem to only be after his own interests, and he may seem to be a chauvinistic pig, and he may seem to be totally inept when it comes to actual human compassion, and he may seem to be a sleazy little... wait, what was my point?"
--The Public Defender

"Sly Fox... deserves your respect. Bow before the... Sly Fox! Obey his every command!! And ladies, he's not such a bad guy, get to know him. He is... (what's this word?) umm, gen-er-ous to all little kiddies and puppies alike. There, I read it. Where is he? I want my two dollars!"
The Misbegotten Mercenary

"I was zipping along Industrial Way, right? When all of a sudden I see this woman being robbed. Unfortunately, there was like, um, you know... NO official record of what was going on, right? So I take a few seconds to grab a tourist with a camera and rush him over there, and try to save the day. And what do I find out? The mugger turns around and whips out a hat and it's him!!!! Sly Fox had been having me tailed and had staged the WHOLE THING! And the "tourist" in the area I had picked up was an undercover reporter! I mean, my career was ruined!!

It's not fare! Sure I didn't save the woman RIGHT away, but I got super SPEED for liberty's sake! I only wanted some recognition I thought I was due. It makes the other foes tremble a bit more! What right does that hopped-up-Zorro-looking CLOWN have to judge me! And besides, he put so much effort into ruining me, shouldn't he have been protecting the streets with his time? I'm gonna sue him for defamation of character...

This is worse than when I got vomit all over my brand new flame detailed boots when I was forced to do a mission with that Yankee Daring. Why do bad things always happen to good people, huh?"
--The Magnificent Speed Demon

"He's a shifty character. And he doesn't get along with his fellow heroes, I know that. But deep down, I know he's got a heart. You know, like that 'little trap' in those old Chaplin flicks? He's a rascal, but with a heart of gold. The only difference is, Sly Fox stole his heart of gold... and he's probably about to pawn it later to buy a snazzy new belt..."
--Prophetic Priest

"He told me I looked FAT! Can you believe that? In THESE pants?? I stitched them together my self for Dolly Madison's sake! Know how long it takes to stitch leather? No? Well let me tell you something, Mr. Man, I-
--The GQ Guru, Member of The Rainbow League

"Query: Who is Sly Fox.
Answer: Not a reputable Hero.
Elaboration: Switched main logic processor in memory bank 1 with 'Nick Blasty's Dirty Limericks, Vol. 1-10.'
Reason: Unfathomable. Perhaps should not have turned on laugh synthesizer when subject originally said <click, recording activated> 'Call me Sly Fox! Woman want me and men want to BE me!' <end recording, click>
Self Query: Explain meaning of 'Nantucket' and why so many females come from said area with odd names and questionable behavior."
--Q-X ThreeFour, Robot Resurrector

"All I know is, I don't borrow another guy's Super-mobile, go for a joy-ride, and return it with a big dent in the side and a used condom in the back seat. Not to mention that stain of god knows what on the floor! If you ask me, that 'Darkwing Duck' of a superhero better not come across ME in a dark alley at night... wait, did that sound too harsh? Maybe it was my fault. I shouldn't have enabled him, I know...
--The Sponsor, Looking to bring understanding and empathy to all misunderstood heroes of Paragon. Call 1-800-HE-CARES.
*five dollars the first minute, one dollar each additional minute*

"I remember me and Sly were working this child abduction case. And it turned out the villain behind it all, Mr. Label, was taking mostly orphans and brainwashing them to pick pockets for him and fund his plans for some kind of evil boy band... well, right off I knew Sly would find SOME way to profit off it before he shut the Sarge down.

Funny thing though... Sly finds out the kids are pick pocketing, he rushes right off and confronts Mr. Label and his Sync-a-pators all by himself. By the time I finally get there, his teen star goons are all walking around in a daze clutching at their throats not be able to utter a sound. Label is tied to a chair and his eyes are taped open Clockwork Orange style. He's being forced to watch American Idol episodes NON-STOP, tears leaking out of the *******'s eyes... and Sly was gone! I was left to tell the authorities what was up and got all the credit.

Those orphan kids were also all rounded up, told to stay off the streets and out of crime, and each of 'em received money to go to a private school AWAY from the city... they never found out who made the sizeable donations either. Only I knew, I guess.

I can't imagine what Sly's childhood must have been like, but for him to give up money AND influence at the same time? Huh...
--Detective Danger



Sly Fox. You wish to know about Sly Fox. I can tell you all about Sly Fox. He has your back, but make sure that you are watching it. I always do and I know he is watching it for me. He is a good guy (polite snicker) but I would not give him the keys to my car.

Deth Aszicen



"Sly Fox... Seems an alright guy, wouldn't trust him as far as I could throw him though. A little twitchy. And shifty. And obnoxious. <pause> Actually, could we start over? I need to call my agent."



"Yeah, I remember Sly Fox. We first met back in the sixties. That was during my Warhol phase. He and I did an eighteen hour film of eating pudding.

"After that I guess he did a few B-flicks. Sort of a Sci-Fi meets erotica if you know what I mean? We sort of lost touch in the late seventies. I was morphed into cybernetic/robot thingy and he stopped sending letters.

"Last I heard he was fronting an Ozzy Osbourne cover band in Omaha... that's just evil."



I just saw all these guys... and I LOVE them!!!! Thank you from the bottom of my Sly heart and keep 'em coming!

...oh yeah, and:

Deth, I don't need your keys... I already had a set made while you told me to hold your purse when you went after that Outcast Rector... where did you THINK I ran off to?

Contact, you're agent told me not to speak to the press about what, quote "might have anything to do with my aforementioned client..." She was cute though, can I have her number?

Ironycon, Ozzy didn't take to Omaha... I think he said "tooomanyfugghshddesbibles..." Thinking of setting him up in Florida... think he'd be a HIT at most Retirement Communities... thoughts?



Roughshod chuckles and shakes her head, "Sly Fox. Ladies Man, scoundrel, rouge, and super-hero."

"I hear alot of folks talkin' 'bout Fox. Heard some of the stories too. I've also done some talkin' with Fox myself."

"This is for you Fox. I ain't buyin' it. The image, the reputation y'all got for yerself... you hate it. Every time a lady tells you no, it hurts. Every time you "put on the Sly Fox charm" and get yer teeth kicked in, it leaves a little scar on yer heart."

Shrugging, Roughshod sighs, "Now, I ain't no mind-reader like the boss. I'm just a big dumb farm girl... but I like t'think I'm a pretty good judge of people. Y'ain't happy Sly. Yer never gonna be either till somethin' changes."

"Just two-cents worth from the rookie."

Roughshod- 11 tanker, First Strike Security, Virtue



"There are certainly a lot of accusations of Sly hanging outside Paragon High in a van..."



Who was stupid enough to let him borrow their van? The Sly Fox dosen't even have a liscense from what I hear.



Hakan Reiver:
"Sly Fox. Yeah... I think I've heard of him...
The name rings a bell... kinda..."



"[Sly Fox] Make[s] statue angry! He [can] come here [and] I [will] splat [him]"
-The Statue



WOW! These are great!!

I will be attending the memorial day parade at Atlas Park, City Hall today, mainly to hear The Ascendant's speech, heh, but also to perhaps... meet a few lovely ladies?

Hope to see you all there!

~The Sly Fox~



Okay I am shocked and amazed at the qoute on The Front Page newspaper. It mentions Sly Fox.


I never thought I would see the words Sly Fox and providing security in same sentance.



"the Fox? Never met the guy, but my ex-sidekick, Lusty Lass, she swears he's the greatest guy.sweet, honorable, understanding, a good listener, punctual.......I'm not sure from what I've heard of him that we're both talking about the same guy, but what can you do? I mean, it's not like I'm her dad, I'm just the sociopath who recruited her for my never-ending battle against evil."

-The Wild Huntsman




Lusty Lass...




I'm sorry, what were we talking about?

~The Sly Fox~



Execute Program: MSHD.exe

Welcome to the Microsoft Hero Directory! Where do you want to go today?
Query: The Sly Fox

Accessing file: TheSlyFox.pst...
Decrypting data... analyzing file info...
Warning! TheSlyFox.pst has caused a fatal exception 0E in module MSHD.exe. Press Ctrl+Alt+Del to continue.

Warning! The system is busy or has become unstable. You can wait and see if it becomes available, or you can restart your computer.




"The Sly Fox delivers his own brand of sugary justice to evildoers and he has a nifty hat!" - Twinkie Man, sponsored by HOSTESS(TM)

Issue 23: All your base are belong to us?



"The Sly fox reminds me a bit of Crackerjack - Guy never knew when to take a situation seriously"
-Samaritan, Honour Guard

"He almos' as bad as Yankee Daring, 'cept he wears 'dat daymn stupid hat. We livin' in a westun' o somethin'?"
-MC Xanatos, Wanted Supervillain


"He is a most rash and perculiar individual. I am sure that when the time comes he can prove his mettle...for better or for worse."



"The Sly Fox? Well, I've heard rumors that he has a swanky hat. Oh, those other rumors? A man's got to have a few vices, y'know. Billy Joel always said, 'I'd rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints,' and I think that's TSF all over."

- Iceangel; hero, java-slinger and "unorthodox information retrieval specialist"

"The proper office of a friend is to side with you when you are in the wrong. Nearly anybody will side with you when you are in the right."
- Mark Twain, Notebook, 1898
- Bart Allen, aka Impulse/Kid Flash/The Flash, Teen Titans v.3, #6



"Mr. Fox is a nice man, yup. He brings me lots of orange juice. No pulp too!"

- Lobe



"Who? . . Oh Zorro . . Yeah I know him, well I dont KNOW him its just quite a few of my ex-girlfriends have come around to see how I'm doing and as we're talking he come on T.V. and she'll say something like 'Ooo thats my new man, he has a nice hat but hes not you' . . "
-- The British Bolt



The Sly Fox? His name is appropriate. He is sly like a fox. Perhaps, though annoying should be added to it...Although he has excellent tast in costume color.
-Red Starr



I really do love each and every one of you for keeping this up.

<bows and sweeps off his hat in front of him>



"The Sly Fox? I guess the best way to decribe him is always having a woman on his lap, a drink in his hand, and a fresh slap mark on his cheek. He seems like a good enough guy, I guess."

--The Daring Haunt and Eidolon



"I'd just like the retract my previous comments regardin' Sly Fox. I was outta line makin' personal assumptions about a superior in th' company.

Won't happen again Sir."

-- Roughshod

First Strike Security