Misho

Lol the non QPQ review thread of Mishio has the wrong URL link. You might want to check into that.

Review for story arc: Operation Pitcher Plant
Creator: @Mecha GM

Well, first off you have a couple of typos in your mission description, like when you typed "reseach" instead of "research". Also if you are going to use the short version for Portal Corporation, you should do it like Portal Corp and not Portal Corps. Or maybe you meant to use an (’s)

Maybe you would do better to simply write it like this:
“The League of Mayhem is robbing a Portal Corp’s research facility; you must stop them before they can steal any critical research data!”

Let’s start off this mission review, shall we?

First there is a thing I want to clarify, since you said in your reply that you wanted to know how it work on teams (the custom group) I decided I would try this arc two times; the first would be in a team, without reading any of the story or the contact’s dialogue and the second time would be entirely dedicated to a solo play.

I will not do this every time someone wants me to see how it would work (their arc) with a team. I do this entirely as a favor to those who have little reviews on their arc and when I see fit to do so.

7 rates are a great lift to a person with an arc that has only 2 so far.
But, again, I won’t be doing this on a regular basis.

As for you arc, I got an 8man going to try out the difficulty of your Custom Group, which I must say right here and now… For a Custom group to be great, it doesn’t need all of your critters with Hard to Extreme Powers.

Some of the bosses and lieutenants actually run out of end from using so many attack powers.

Two of the critters I’ll mention are the Mercenary Captain and the S Siege-Unit. Great costume designs and all, but you made them a little bit hard, considering not everyone out there has a character with a primary/secondary defensive powerset, they can beat to a pulp the “squishy types” in a second, especially since all of the captains (apparently) have the sniper shot, which you can hardly try to interrupt or control when there’s like 6 of them per spawn group.
They were actually 1 hit KO-ing the trollers in the team. You might want to re-check their powers and tweak all of them down a little bit.

As an additional note, your Captain’ critter info was nicely done with the exception of your usage of the word “support” two times way too close to each other(and all of the mercenaries info from what I can see), try some synonyms like “provide assistance” or “help”, even the word “aid” would look nicely as a replacement for one of the “support”; you also typed a line which you could erase completely (again, in his info) which goes as “…, such as this fellow, ...”

In the Boss type of the armored units, the Siege-Unit looks pretty cool to me that in fact it is a big disappointment that you gave him only a short paragraph for a description, which doesn’t really depict him, it seems more like a follow up of the minion’s and the lieutenant’ one.

Well that’s it for these two types of guys. I wanted to mention them before since when I try this arc solo, no bosses will spawn and therefore I wouldn’t be able to notice them at all.

Now that the team version is done and over with, I will start the review for the solo version of the arc.

Mission 1 : To begin with, I see that you have got a couple of problems aside from the typos I will point out later; these problems in question are the use of so many similar words repeated so many times in a single Dialogue box, for example, you used the following Portal, portable and portal and the weird structure you use to narrate your story.

I like the fact that Dr. Engles is so “straight to the point” but I think she might be a little too much, just this time I will type the Intro Dialogue and point out in ( ) my own views on how you could improve your narrative skills.

“Operation Pitcher Plant (Nice title, too bad no subtitle but not really needed)

Ah, you’re here. Excellent. I’ve just received a report (you could change it for “I’ve just received word”) that a secret Portal Corp laboratory is being raided by the League of Mayhem (maybe not use the name of the custom group here, to build up more suspense as to whom is raiding the laboratory) .They’ve been hired to steal (How does she know they’ve been hired, actually how does she know anything from them?) some very important research Portal Corp is doing on an experimental portable dimensional portal generator. (See all the similar words in there? Try using alternatives like “…research the Corporation is currently developing on an experimental transportable dimensional portal generator.”) I don’t think I need to tell you how much trouble such a device could cause in the wrong hands.

Would you please stop the League of Mayhem from stealing this research? (Such a kind contact, asking me if I would mind helping, but in reality a contact in need that has just received an urgent report of a secret –probably important- laboratory is being raided would be a little more… desperate to get my assistance in the matter, try re-phrasing this a little bit) ”

Well, you got a couple of typos in the Send Off, when you typed “techinical” you should change it to “technical”. When you typed “she’s not especially tech savvy herself” you could add a "very" between “especially” and “tech”.

In your Still busy you typed yet again Portable Portal Generator, try an alternative as the example above. Also you could add an “If you don’t,” in the first part so it looks like this “Hurry! [u]If you don’t[u], the League of Mayhem will get their hands on that P.P.G. all too soon!”. It would make the sentence sound better.

Well, now that we’ve tried to give the text a face-lift, let’s head into the mission, shall we?

The mish pop text when you enter could be changed a little.

This could be another way you could do it:
“There is something odd about this raid… But you can’t put your finger on what exactly.”

The enemy group is interesting, the Merc. Troopers are nothing of what I would expect them to be since they go and charge at you head-on using Martial Arts, while their description says that “they are competent shots with their rifles”.

I don’t know which combat preference but it would appear that melee is a solid bet. You could make them Ranged. It would make a little bit more of sense.

I particularly liked the Merc. MediSuits since it’s a really original concept so far. Many would disagree, probably, but is like a cheap, ranged unit that can really turn the tide of the battle sometimes but it isn’t too much of a headache.

Nice balance. I really liked the costume designs of this group and the fact that their members experience a hierarchy a little like in the Outcasts.

To explain myself a little better, you see the Outcast Torch ( minion) , the Scorcher ( lieutenant) and the Lead Scorcher ( boss) . In this case you see the Mercenary Trooper ( minion) , the Mercenary Sergeant ( lieutenant) and the Mercenary Captain ( boss) for example. And you have two different sets; the Battle suits ones and the Mercenary Soldiers, each with its own progression. Pretty simple but likeable.
I did anyhow.

On La Fae’s info you have some typos “peresented” instead of "presented", “to barbarian tribes” when in the context it would make a lot more sense “to many barbarian tribes”.
In “to spread chaos, and destruction” you can lose the “,”. “irritates her and amuses her” could be “irritates and amuses her” “opportunities to amuse herself” could be “opportunities to entertain herself” since the two “amuses” are too close to the other.

In her text you typed “Fie, fie” maybe this is the sound she makes when talking, but you could add a couple of * * at each side so that I know is not a word and simply a sound.

In the Battlesuit’ description you could change the third “support” for another word, as stated above.
In the Sergeants’ description you might want to consider replacing “hang back at range” with “hang back, away from melee combat”.

Fun yet corny battle text’s on the boss fights of Morrigan and Cyberix.

Superianna is way too tough on solo, having her kill me in one uppercut.
There’s also a typo in her talk, she says “exepected” instead of “expected”.
Also “you don’t stand a chance to escape me” sounds weird… Try “there’s no chance you’ll escape me”. Also it’s not “balliwick” but “bailiwick”.

Well, I had to use 2 shivans to finally defeat Superianna and then I could finally get to the safe.

The chat text suffers from the same problem when referring to the main objective, this time adding another “p” word. “You have opened the safe and recovered the Portable Portal Generator Plans”. Again, there’s no problem with the P.P.G. name but you could change it a bit so it doesn’t sound repetitive.

I won’t even mention that it happens again in the mission complete pop up message… Well, I just did… But you might want to check into that.

The returning words for the Mission Success text were pretty nice and ably applied to the situation. It sums up everything that just happened pretty well.

Mission 2 : Nice dialogue here, you could change “City Councilman” to lowercase since you already include his name “Harry” there.

Nice hostage’ dialogue. A bit repetitive if anything since the office workers all have the same dialogue.
Good Councilman Harry’s Dialogue. In his description you must change “Petrified” to “petrified”.

In Steel Locust’ info, you typed “…wearing a suit of battle armor…”, you could change this to “wearing a battle armor”. It’s a minor change but you can consider it.

Interesting costume design for the EB that appears with the 5th Column spawn.
Nice, concise and short description too.
The first Dialogue of Gamma Emitter is a little big; you might want to make it smaller.

Also the clues so far are really useful so far in comprehending the story.

Mission 3 : Nice dialogue and motivation for the mission.

When I got into the mission I noticed a couple of things, I was kind of disappointed that there were no side objectives to complete but to defeat Oberst Olbrech. The other thing I noticed was that since the first two missions were so engaging because you had to experience and win many boss battles, bring down some really tough opponents and find some clues, I thought that the last mission was kind of mediocre.

It was interesting that you had the whole “came-back-from-the-future-to-kill-you” ordeal, creating maybe a time paradox if he could actually defeat you. But, the guy wasn’t really strong… at all.
In fact I downed him in one charged attack. It was kind of lame…

And no clue???! I could have used something to help explain a little more the plot to me.

The contact’ returning dialogue was kind of short. Had that “hurried-up” feeling some arcs get on the last dialogues.

Well, surprisingly enough I have only the following to add:

Rank:**** Strange as it might sound, I had a great time doing this arc, both in the team way and the solo run (well, at least after I finally defeated the first EB I did). Is an arc I would recommend to do a mindless hack and slash run with my friends.
But I wouldn’t recommend it for the story or the plot.

I also didn't understood why the arc was named like that, maybe I missed a reference, or maybe there's no connection between the arc's name and the story.

Actually was really tempted to give you a 3. But there were some redeeming factors I couldn’t ignore.

On the bright side, you did made one tough yet soloable enemy group that was balanced, visually appealing and fun to fight.

On the not-so brighter side that could have given you a better rate… No souvenir???

It was a huge letdown considering you could have built a little more suspense as to who really was after you, why, and if would you hear from them again in the foreseeable future.

Many special thanks to the following Pinnacle Players who participated on the 8man run for this MA arc:
Miar Ratha
Mending Surprise
Heat Shadow
Do’jin
Rubble
‘Imp Master
‘Tungsten Flame


Now its time for short message brought to you by the author of this post…

As a last minute add-on, I’ve been playing the arcs taking a lot more of my personal time that I had expected and unfortunately I’ve got a couple of term papers due this upcoming week. I won't be playing as much as I usually do, but fear not, I will get to all of the arcs that are queued up in the list. And will be reviewing them a lot faster too but still in the same fashion I've been trying to do all my other reviews.

But duty first, pleasure later. Hope you all understand and if you don't, there’s nothing I can really do.

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Arranged in alphabetical order for fairness and ease of use:
Bayani
Beach_Lifeguard
Bubbawheat (QPQ)
Burning_Brawler (QPQ)
DeviousMe (QPQ)
Dominemisis (QPQ)
Dragonslay
Frozen_Northman (QPQ)
HolyEvilAoD
Lazarus (QPQ)
Misho (QPQ)
Peacemoon (QPQ)
Policewoman (QPQ)
Rapulis
ridiculous_girl (QPQ)
Sooner (QPQ)
Stomphoof (QPQ)
Talen_Lee
Venture

EU reviewers
Col.Blitzkrieger
Leese
Master_Zaprobo (In character)

Review sites
CoH Mission Review
Mission Architect Advanced Search Site

Note: QPQ = quid pro quo: Play and rate/give feedback to the reviewer first in order to get a review on your arc, some are more lenient on this than others. Also, tends to have a shorter queue.

Also, some non-QPQ have more than one reviewer with some not accepting new submissions, check the most recent page for up-to-date information.

Cleaned up the links so they can be quotable now ;^_^.

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I'll add another thread of mine that is no QPQ, I'm just reviewing arcs, all of them

Misho

From the begining of the thread. Feel free to add your arcs and I'll get around to review them. Possibly and most probably in teams as well.


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Review for story arc: Soldiers of Fortune
Creator: @Mekkanos

Well, my first Villainous review of the thread. I must say I’m really excited since it’s a little hard for many people out there to write good evil material.

Ok as far as the mission description goes, fairly well done.
No other pre mission comments, so let’s get this show on road.

Mission 1 : Ok, Darrin Wade, I presume he’s going to send me around on some errands fetching some stuff. And… I wasn’t wrong actually.
Well, I have got to go take a couple of art pieces for him before they get into the museum’ well protected halls.

Ok as far as the Mission Intro and Send Off go, really nicely done, a little too much dialogue for me. Or maybe it is enough, just too packed together.

Unfortunately the Still busy dialogue here doesn’t gets exploited and there’s plenty of opportunities for that, like Darren elaborating on the other goodies I might expect to find.

Presuming I’m in a just-what-you-need-to-know basis, I head into the mission to fetch whatever might have caught his eye. I mean he has done so already in the past, when he just sent me inside the main base of a supergroup with some deadly statues that killed me in a blink. Well, who knows, maybe this time will be different…

But no it wasn’t apparently I just popped in the mission just in time to frustrate my “new-found” mercenary competition.
I must say great descriptions on the customs, nice group name. My only complain with them is that the powers that they use are so… cliché in some way. I enjoyed the boss Hellraiser type and the Technician ones.

My other complaint is regarding the mission clues. You could have added a little more flavor to this mission if you had a different clue appear on each glowie. I mean, give a little more side-reading to the player about what he’s fetching, and maybe add some dialogue like: “this looks pretty expensive, you guess Darren won’t notice that you kept some, in compensation for you “hard work”. Again, you are the author, but having 5 glowies with one clue that you actually get from the First display case, is a little boring.

Moving on, great dialogues and great ambush selection with the Sky Raiders. In my case the Porters started to spawn right behind me like immediately after I brought down the Hellraiser Sykes, giving an intense feeling of action and surprise.

Mission 2 : The dialogue here is strong, and it makes perfect sense, without any other addition to make, I head into the mission.

Well, one problem here is that Darren said this was going to be a one side battle because of the sheer number of the Raiders in proportion to the Paradigm group, but having only one group of paradigm (the boss group) is kind of ridiculous, is not a battle at all (iit's a massacre!). Maybe you did add some battle Paradigm/Raiders, and I just didn’t see them.
But you could have included a couple of conversations on the battles to make the mission more interesting.

As advised by my contact, I tried to stay out of the battles (which where almost non existent, not including the PPD patrols sometimes walking into the Sky Raiders), and went Boss hunting.

The first boss (the paradigm one) was located in a nice spot, middle of the screen, fairly easy to see. Fought him and defeated him. Nice battle although it was kind of let down that there wasn’t any clue afterwards. Now, only the Sky Raider Leader stands between me and the Eye of Chronos. Problem is… It was incredible difficult to find! I don’t know what are the specifications that you are using for your map spawns, but since I’m used to the bosses being at the end of the map, that’s where I headed first…

To my surprise, the guy actually spawned behind one of the first buildings near the beginning of the screen, I felt really stupid for missing him in the first place, but maybe consider that your average player will not scout the complete map when he/she is used seeing the bosses at the end of the screen in maps like this one.

Well, after defeating the Sky Raider guy, I find that they have already extracted the Eye from the site and transport it to a secure location. I got his clue and [u]interesting[u] enough, I got the clue I was supposed to get from the Paradigm guy I defeated like 5 minutes ago… Maybe you did it in this order because the mission complete clue allows more characters than the boss defeated clue, but you should take into consideration that sometimes players (like myself) will find odd the clue lag when they defeat the Paradigm guy first.

Also, for a technological advanced mercenary such as a Sky raider, finding a “note” on him makes me feel like a found a piece of paper on him Maybe, you could change this to a little more sophisticated alternative. Like a “captain’s log” or even like an iPhone or something like that.

Mission 3 : The intro and Send off Dialogues suffer from the same strengths and weaknesses as the previous ones, great description and flow, but a little too bunched together for my taste. And for my eyes.
And interesting enough, the still busy is a clean, neat, concise one, and is one of the few that doesn’t bother me at all.

The summoning of creatures inside the mission is a nice touch.

Nice pop up mission dialogue.

Can’t say that the npc ally surprised me since I gathered from the first clue ever in this arc that the Rularuu were going to be involved in some way.
But that doesn’t mean I don’t like it, in fact I’m sure your average player will like it.

Also, good job on the dialogue of the Eyeballs.

Nice mission dialogue for the safes.

A little unexpected boss battle with a ***** (No spoilers) which was kind of unexpected following the first part of plot. You could have done that the guys surrounding the boss were carrying suitcases (as in if they were bringing the money in the suitcases) But that’s just a visual effect.

What a shame that there wasn’t a clue upon mission completion. You could have even made a clue saying like: “Seems like once again, you are a little late. You should better report back with Darren” Or something. I was kind of expecting something, especially since I thought this was it.

The contact’s words here couldn’t express any better my thoughts about being tired of chasing the groups around just for nothing. Considering the past in-game arcs that I have run with Darren, I would recommend you something to keep in-character and make this 3 missions a little more needed. You could have Darren only perform the magical localization spell up until now because he needed something you found in the base. For example, make that in mish 3 there is a Paradigm Boss/Sky Raider Base commander, that when you defeat you get a sample out of him or like a blood-stained (sample?) floppy disk, for example.

Since one of the components needed (if memory serves me well) is something that belonged to the person in question (like a handful of hair), to able to locate where the Eye might be right now. You know, give a good reason why he couldn’t cast that spell up until now.

Because otherwise I just ask myself, why the bloody hell didn’t he just cast this spell since mission 2 to begin with?

Mission 4 : Once again, you have got to be careful when introducing a deux ex machina element like a localization spell in your arc, it makes me wonder if I couldn’t just skip this whole mission if Darren could simply divine who’s the Paradigm client and where he/she is.
But for the sake of the story, I’m off to hack into a network.

The Dialogues (all three Intro-Send Off-Still busy) are really well done, and intriguing.

I find the map selection a little bit recurring, with different paint jobs between the Portal Corp one, and this one, but they have the exact same layout.
You might want to check if you can do something about this.

The summoned creatures’ dialogue was ok. One of them actually didn’t talk like Rularuu at all, but it’s ok.

The boss dialogue was really good, and it made me wonder, wouldn’t it had been easier to bribe the Paradigm guys off? But what good is that when you can hack your way toward your goal?

Also interesting final clue, very appropriate and builds a lot of expectation for the final mission.

Mission 5 : The motivation in the contact Dialogue for this mission was kind of a let down; it didn’t actually make me feel motivated to go get some artifact that I have already wasted a lot of time trying to get.
The promise of the artifacts’ power is tempting enough, but you’ve got to consider that since I’m a villain, my patience will be tested unless I’m offered a good reason why to do it. Vengeance? Power? Money?

I don’t know, he does explain further what the Eye of Chronos really is in the Send Off dialogue, but still I feel a little more motivation is required. Especially since I’m about to risk my hide out there in a mission that already hints me is going to be difficult

This map is a “must love it” type; it really makes you feel like you are infiltrating the main base of operations. I must say that the Arachnos commander dialogue took me completely by surprise, especially the last text. Which revealed a good chunk of the plot to me without having even finished the mission itself.

I would have changed the objective text in the navigational compass at the end after you defeat the Hellraiser Freeman, from “Investigate interlopers in the tunnel” to something more like “you have the Eye! Now escape the cavern” Since the mission wouldn’t complete until I did try to leave through the main door, I would encounter the EB, General White waiting for me, surprising me even more!

But that’s that. With the ****, defeated and the final clue explaining me the whole arc, I feel like I can go report to my crony, Darren, and finish up this complicated plot.
(Nice detail of the Rularuu helping you decode the final Clue)

I liked the AV design as well.

Well the mission is over and if we could edit and grant our own sets of temp powers, I would pretty much look forward to what you would set the Eye of Chronos to do.

Rank:**** An attention-grabbing arc, really interesting custom group and usage of the whole mercenary group against mercenary group ordeal.

No real final comments, except that I know you have been trying to get reviews on different threads for this arc before, and apparently you have been successful at it. It’s not Dev’s Choice or Hall of Fame material. I wouldn’t even say that is the best of your arcs, but is a remarkable one on its own.
I dare say that the Sky Raiders don't get plenty attention in the game, and that you used them as an important factor for you story really pikes my interest.

Some work on it would improve much the story and overall quality.

I liked the souvenir as well. And I must point out another thing... It was actually refreshing not finding any typos in an arc... Anywhere Good job!

Review for story arc: Blitzkrieg
Creator: @Mekkanos

Ok first I need to say a couple of things, nice short and helpful description on the overall arc. I find it funny that people always use Crimson whenever someone mentions the Malta Group, but in this case is ok, makes it feel like you are actually playing an in-game mission arc.
Let’s start this show then.
Mission 1 : The dialogue is credible and concise to what you need to do and why. I would change in the Send Off Dialogue window “someplace” for maybe “someone that can actually provide some answers”. But is up to you, the author, to either change this or not.

The mission felt pretty cool actually, the enemy dialogues were clever and very “in-character” for the Malta Group. There’s only one typo, you used to many … in the defeated text of the boss Bishop.
It should be” This isn’t over, fool. No, it’s only the… beginning.”
Also the clue was really intriguing and let me wanting to know more about the arc.

Mission 2 : Good Intro and Send Off Dialogue, it all feels like something the real Crimson would tell you and the little I can gather of the plot reminds me of the Top Cow series with Apex, War Witch & Horus. Let see how it fares.

In the mish, when I saw my character had entered an Arachnos base I was thinking “How cool would it be that the enemy group here were the Rogue instead of the regular ones?”, so you can imagine my surprise when I saw that the enemy group was them. I find it very refreshing seeing that it has actually maintained the story-line of the game’s canon material. The Zeus Class titans are interesting bosses, always fun and hard to battle, but, in this case there seems to be an error with their settings, since they ask for reinforcements when badly wounded, but only one ambush ever responded to the call for only the first of the Zeus Titans, the rest kept asking for them (reinforcements) but none ever came. You can solve this by breaking them into separate Fight a Boss objective, giving them their own ambush spawn.

Again, in the boss final words after being defeated, you over-used the “…..” Three are enough.
Nice clues, I especially liked the Marshal Blitz message.

Mission 3 : Good Intro and send Off Dialogues yet again, I dare say that your narrative skills improve by leaps the more I get involve in this plot. I feel the excitement pre-battle bubbling up inside me already. I want to know more about the arc itself as I’m playing and that is always a great sign. Also great lore use with the name of the arc, I had actually forgotten it was the name of a lightning strike operation made in WW2.

Again with the excessive “…….”, this time I found them on the Burning Ronin dialogue. Not to get extremely anal with this minor typo, but the correct form is to use only three consecutive dots.
By the way, great Boss selection.

Also nicely done mish intro pop up, very enlightening, especially for those not familiar with the Zig map.

Also good use of the “Destined Ones” raids as a reference. I honestly can see this arc as part of the canon of the game lore.

Mission 4 : As I stated before, the narration just keeps getting better and better, this time the mission briefing actually gave me some useful Intel regarding some of the barrels I need to dispose off. The only thing is that if I were a radioactive character there could be some difficulties to adapt the process that explains that the material only explodes with radioactive energies, then where would it leave me?. But I won’t delve too much into that. I like the story so far… So much, in fact, that the time here is 2 am and I’m still wide awake in attention of what’s going to happen next.

The only little detail that didn’t convince me entirely was the Black Empress suit. It looked more like a chaotic mess of a police officer with a Gunslinger, bearing the Malta colors. Perhaps you could invest some more time designing her suit better. Her info display was ok. Like how all the Malta bosses so far are named after chess pieces.

As something you might want to consider, the entrance of this map mish is an Arachnos Flyer, since you already got the whole Rogue Arachnos/Malta deal going on, you could state at some point that you approached the Malta Base in a stolen Rogue Arachnos Flyer in order to avoid raising the alarm. Or something. You know, use the game tools in your favor.

Nice clue regarding the Story of Fallout. And nice hero.
Very well, I can’t wait for the exciting conclusion.

Mission 5 : Great final mission build up.

The mission is excellent, continually engaging, the hostages don’t take too long to find, I think two hours might be a little too much for the sense of urgency you wanted to implement here… 45 minutes is a little more credible. Also I deeply enjoyed the participation of Indigo in the mission. In the description of Isotope you typed “However, he’s willing to control his chaos for a price…” When it would actually sound better like “However, he’s willing to control his chaotic behavior for a price”…

Actually, up until now, I have found only a couple of things you could have done to improve your story, like for example include a story on how they were kidnapped by the Malta when you rescue the son, or her husband strange behavior as of lately, when you rescue the wife. I mean Fallout kind of becomes a side story in the arc; you could give it a little more flavor by including a couple of clues or something like that there.

Well besides that, I deeply enjoyed the design of the costume of the Black Monarch, and his power-sets make sense, what I didn’t like as much is that his first dialogue is so damn big I can’t be read all before combat starts, and he just keeps on talking, therefore I have to stop after the battle and scroll up to see the entire dialogue. The best of his lines is the checkmate one. It was, decisively, a great chess game.

Ok, I’m done; it took me 40 minutes to complete the whole arc. The feeling of having saved hundreds of lives, not including the ones of Fallout and his family makes me more heroic and epic than many other arcs out there.

Rank:***** An Outstanding arc, has every element that makes me remember the story. It was fun, well written, intriguing; it has major plots that you thwart, people you save from certain death and an already excellent enemy group that you can beat up, all in a days work. It would most definitely play this one over again with my friends.

One element that I did find tiresome is that constant way Crimson refers to the Malta as our “friends”. It’s ok to keep in-character and follow the game lore. But try not to over-abuse it. I ended up seeing the expression “friends” almost in all of the Mission Intro and Send Off dialogues every time the Malta were mentioned.

Excellent souvenir as well. Great reading material.

Well, keep it up and will review your other arc as soon as I can tomorrow or later today.

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Review for story arc: Point and Counterpoint – Part One.
Creator: @Spazztic

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Thanks for the review! As far as the text goes, I just haven't played with the text enough to figure out color changing and font size. I'll fix all the stuff I missed, change the chat up a bit, and maybe add a souvenir.

I'll let you know when all that's done, if you wouldn't mind checking it out again once everything's fixed and fancied up.

Thanks for the input!

edit: speaking of, how do I change the font size in MA?

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Select the text you want to change color/size and right click on it. A drop down menu will appear with several options, randing from bold, to set colors, to text font size.
Also don't unpublish your arc (simply edit it) or you will permanently lose all the rates and stars you had accumulated up to now in your arc.

Review for story arc: A.E.'s Premium Quality Mission: "guaranteed qualityyyyLOADING ERROR 0.000459
Creator: @Clave Dark 5

Well, reviewing your other funny arc.

Mission 1 : Well then, another funny arc, I’m speaking with Fritz the AE rep. From what I can gather by seeing your arc text already is that is going to be hard for to point out typos that might exist, since that is part of the point of the arc.
First of, you accept Text is way too big, it doesn’t even appear completely in the dialogue box and I had to press and hold to read it. Again since I don’t know if you meant for this to be this way I can’t really tell you if it’s wrong or not. What I can tell you is that I don’t like it much. The “quAElity” seems a bit odd, and I suspect is never going to become a great hit in the whole Architect Entertainment idea, but is a good way to introduce a new word that people working for the AE might want to use to pitch their products.
After reading the Still busy dialogue I kind of ruined myself the surprise that there are actually no Rikti in the mission. You might want to consider changing this a bit since players will ruin the surprise for themselves just like I did.
The chat window text description of what you are doing when tinkering with the Glowies could use a little bit more of work on them.

Well the clues you get for this two glowies are really a big help either, but it adds flavor to the arc. Oh what’s this? Is it my old friend Rabbitual Criminal? Hahaha I’m actually amazed I recognized it. The Bunny Boy wasn’t anything like the first time I fought it, and unfortunately was better in the other arc. But I’m still in the first mission.
After I defeated him he had a typo saying Othe instead of Other. If this was intentional please disregard this.

Lol I really liked the endorsement of the boss, and the candy bar that is sooo good, it’s criminal!

Mission 2 : This mission Intro Dialogue is the almost the exact same as the still busy of the first one?! I consider this to be a really bad element that should be used lightly or not at all. And the same joke about the rikti under the seat, is well… not funny.

I did like the way that you wrote the dialogue do differentiate when the contact is talking to me, when he’s talking with the Techs on the phone and when he tells me important information.
Again you made the same mistake of the Still busy dialogue, writing a huge spoiler for the mish. And since I read the still busy right after I accept the mission but still haven’t entered the mission per se, I just messed the totally expected information about the mission being broken.
Again with words like GrAEt and StAEndard, I had to laugh when I saw in my imagination how the guy would look like trying to say with a straight face to me.

There’s a typo in the Get out of the mish now Destroyable Airplane. In the last text, you typed sendidng instead of sending.

I find it interesting that while I’m trying to beat the snot out of that snot-like beast, it has a dialogue like if a group of tech support guys were trying to fix the bugs in the arc.

The critters called Ted’s Private files, had no description, and for me that’s a huge no-no.

I actually got bored playing this mission.
Since the last thing I had to find, the Rikti Hypher unit spawned in an awkward place, like inside one of the skyscrapers’ corner.
This actually helped to the general feeling of game being bugged and all. I know this is hardly your fault, but I would have used an in door map to make the hunt for Destructible object less tedious. The Mission Pop up dialogue was a redeeming factor here, I really had to grin remembering all those crashes in the past.
The clues names are so long I can’t even read the whole text, which makes me feel that I’m missing out on some vital/possibly funny info. Better check that out.


Mission 3 : Ok this is a dead horse I don’t get tired of beating. Don’t use exactly the same dialogue in this window and the Still Busy Dialogue Window in the past mish.
I would change the word recompense here with something else. Like use “I’m authorized to offer you a small compensation for any issues and/or frustration you might have experienced”, make the answer a more CS/PR one.
The motivation here is a little weak, and it seems strange that you are to receive any compensation coming from the IT guys, when usually is the Costumer Service departments that handles things like that. I accepted the near-worthless bribe in order to continue the arc, but in any other case I would have simply dropped the arc altogether.

Here in the mish I find a couple of this confusing, like am I in the basement of the A.E. building or a virtual replica of it? If I’m in real life why are the bug corruption critters here? If I’m in the VR of the A.E, then why are the technicians here?
Also having almost no dialogue in the captive/hostage situations makes it a little mediocre and plain.
Also the PR guy being boss class makes it a little unreal, shouldn't he be like “person class”?

In the clue of A.E. A.I. Server Controls Now Reset you could replace off with on making that “Looks like something they bought on eBay”.

Well, just finished. I can’t really say anything about this one.
It feels like you didn’t really try it out on a test run. I see a lot of repetitive elements on this arc and some that could have made it a lot better. Like more conversations, even if you do them about more errors like MISSING_TEXT_01 or something like that. Something to keep my attention on the arc.

Rank:*** A difficult decision for me since I didn’t like it, not as much as I did your other, much funnier arc. I wouldn’t really try this one again.

No other comments.

Review for story arc: TOO MANY BUNNYGIRLS
Creator: @Clave Dark 5

Well when I saw this was supposed to be a funny arc, I was hoping it wouldn’t degrade from fun to corny, like it usually happens.

First of all I’ve got to say that me and my team braced ourselves when I saw the contact was a Cabinet File.
It usually happens that when you use some inanimate object to be your contact, the story telling can be completely impossible to follow, or idiotic.

In this case it had a nice mix of description and narration that made it actually credible that my character was doing everything that it was indicated.

I searched real hard for typos, grammar errors and the likes, but there were very few.

Let’s get this bashing started!
Mission 1 : Well, I better start off by saying that I haven’t encountered as many bunnygirls as this arc claims there are floating around in the MA published arcs. What I have found is an endless army of cat-girls in some less than ok arcs. Maybe the bunnygirl thing is a reference to the cat girls, I’ll never know. Ok when I first entered, I was suddenly slapped in the face with a blast from the past when I was a little kid and saw Elmer Fudge follow around that nasty “wabbit” with his shotgun.
The enemy group here surprised me a little bit, I managed to round up a 7man team, and I was a little disappointed seeing there is no boss class in the custom group.
And it was a little bad actually, seeing that the Lieutenants names had a good pun in it and perhaps it could have been used in a boss type as well. The first thing I noted was the names in the Navigational Compass. Although they were pretty entertaining, it was nothing above the ordinary and I don’t really recall any of them right now.

A dialogue here where a bunny girl says something about the Doc being please reminded me again of Bugs, but after I finished the mish I saw it meant something else.

I actually didn’t understand the whole point of what I supposed was a rescue mission until I finished the mish. In fact, when I rescued one of the guys that was shaking, he told me something like I was wrong about you heroes, I hate you, you friggin jerks! And I was a little-wittle confused, but then it turns it was like an underground brothel and they were paying for the entertainment, I was like ok I get it now. I laughed real hard at the display info of Annie Ying, it was really well done. And I kept asking myself where Hugh was.

One thing I’ve gotta tell you, some of the bunnygirls were dancing in the hostage groups and actually looked pretty nice since they formed a circle around the hapless guy and danced for him, but some were “writing on clip-boards”? I don’t know, but it seems out of place, especially when you spawn 11 bunnygirls writing all together.

Mission 2 : Very well now, up to this point I was trying to get every detail on the cabinet file dialogue (Nice use of colors and the -------- in your title and subtitles). I didn’t find it incredibly hilarious, but made me feel like I was really taking action against all those bunnygirls arcs out there!
When I saw the name of the boss I had to fight I had to laugh, but I laughed harder when I saw it was a Boy-bunny. Lol gross but ok let’s move on. Defeated him and destroyed the Bunny Transformation Ray (Acutally didn’t get to read the description because on of the team members blew it up with a snipe).
I would have liked that I could… ermm… “Confiscate” the Bunny ray machine… I mean, who knows when it can become useful? Lol other than that I liked the whole mish as a whole except the navigational text for the shipping manifest. You could write something down on that field, like “Investigate the shipping records” or something like that. Also you have a typo on the Criminal’s text when he tries to run away, you typed beleive instead of believe.

Mission 3 : When I learned my next mission was to shut down the Rogue Isles/Paragon City X-aminer, I was like well I hope this isn’t when the humor goes downhill.

But it was a nicely done, fast and witty mission altogether. The Fashionista Bunny that lost her tail and was in full armor cracked me up. I’ve never had anyone threaten me with getting my name in the top Worst Dressed. I felt like in a E! Fashion Police episode. And it felt kind of cool seeing her summon the bots with her dialogue.
And she is totally wrong; my boots are perfect with my top.

I liked the fact that, humor aside, Annie Ying powers of Illusion made sense since her character main purpose in the story is misdirection and “photoshop-ing”.

The Love section Editor Woman, didn’t really did it for me, not as funny as some parts in the rest of the arc, but it was ok, just one more cat Lady.

The final boss, the diminutive Dr. Maggie Von BunnyGirl, was really funny, (not in her description) but on her text. It made me remind all those German Scientists and how they are overly used.
Lol beating this arc didn’t actually made me feel more epic or heroic, but it was a refreshing change to actually break the fourth wall a little and laugh out lout with some stuff I tough it was going to suck honestly.

Rating: **** A really fun arc, wouldn’t play it again, because I’m afraid this kind of humor gets old fast. On the other side, great Custom Critter design and good luck out there eradicating other bunnygirl arcs.

Well nothing else to do now than to call mom regarding those photos and move on to reviewing more arcs

Many special thanks to the following Pinnacle Players who participated on this MA arc run:
Midnight Faith
Sharp Impact
Soundscape
Red Pheonix 1
Nikkolas
Anna Pocalypse

Review for story arc: Point and Counterpoint – Part One.
Creator: @Spazztic

First of all, I have to say that when I saw the story arc number of rates (2) and star average (3) I felt a little bad for the creator and decided to pull a team together in order to get some multiple star rating votes in there.
Interesting enough, when I started playing the arc, I was immensely surprised to see that it was actually something completely different of what I first thought.

You’ve got very few typos. Since I read everything in your arc when I review it, I noticed that in the arc description you had an error regarding a single word. This is the way it should look like.
“A mysterious entity is plaguing the PPD. It’s none like they’ve ever encountered before, and you’re the one they’ve chosen to figure out what it is, and if necessary, stop it.”

I started this arc with 6 players total (including myself), playing at level 50 (with sidekicks and mentors) so that I could experience the full capacity of the arc, regarding difficulty because both of the enemies and the group size.

I want to clarify that I got the extra teammates to provide more rating volume to the arc, not to get help in my review in any way, yet the people who pitched in were a great help and good natured players who provided their own reviews of the arc per se.

Mission 1 :: When I saw it was a PPD contact in full armor, the first thing I thought was “This can either suck (just another shooting gallery-no purpose arc) or be something else”. When playing I want to keep three perspectives going, first what would this look like in a comic book style? Second, how would this look in a real life situation? And finally how this looks as in-game addition?

Well up to know is a PPD armored officer asking me to investigate the appearance of a new group, which appeared on the Rogue Isles but is trying to butt in our turf, Paragon City.
All good so far, only comment I have up ‘till now is that the title and subtitle were done in the same size and color as the rest of the Dialogue. You could take into consideration using some colors to make more… visually stunning to the reader.
The send off also makes sense… What did felt like it wasn't really thought out was the Still busy response… Many people wouldn’t even read this, but I did and I found it to be a little awkward.

Inside the mission now, I found the enemy group to be really interesting and visually attractive. Some of the clues texts were used nicely and the enemy dialogues are fun and easy to understand. What I didn’t get so much was the first clue I found, a cell phone with a picture on it of a guy framed by an explosion, in which the user of the phone had enough time to type the cryptic “The Sons of Sorrow are here” Also the clue on its own is a little confusing. I used my wits to imagine that when you typed all the loose ends were tied up it meant that they had killed the poor guy. Anyhow pretty good so far.
The guy that you rescue actually provides a more interesting clue with his tale, way better than the telephone thing.
It’s a little disappointing not getting a clue after defeating the Base Leader, since the telephone one was so useless as to enlighten me of who are these new guys in town, you know, something to report to the contact.

Well, nice mission so far.

Moving on...

Mission 2 : Again the title or subtitle of the mish could have used another color or even font size, since the first time I read it, I saw “Help the bad guys. Great job raiding that base. etc…” And I was like what? Maybe you didn’t see this one little detail, but you average reader will.

Ok, up to now, good job explaining me how did a PPD officer knew about an Arachnos base getting attacked all of the sudden. I don’t feel like you really did motivated me to actually go and save their hides, and maybe you could play a little with this fact, making the mission a timed one, leaving the responsibility to the player to either take on the mission or simply let them to their fates.
But is also ok in this fashion, after all I’m a hero, what should I be doing if not helping the enemy of enemy out? I mean, the contact doesn’t even warn me that it might be a trap… You know?
But anyhow, moving along with the review, I find a couple of things intriguing like the fact that this group is up again, appearing not only in this Arachnos base, but in several other places all of the sudden. What could they be up to?

A couple of things I have to bring up. The send off Dialogue strikes me as a little off character for this cop and the still busy text is almost the same of the first mission and really adds nothing to the story, almost as if you didn’t even want to type anything into that field.

A patrol in this mish has a huge error in it, you probably haven’t noticed, but you can’t use “Backspaces” when typing text into a critter’s dialogue. And the patrol that uses some makes it look like this “Row row row row your boat. <br><br> What? I’m bored.”

A not-required-for-mission completion glowie, although trying to be funny, it felt kind of out of place in this intriguing story, almost downright dumb. I pin-point this out because sometimes (like in this case) the story is compelling and interesting, and the creator comes out with this attempt of side humor, that can degrade a little the story.

Interesting enough the clue you get after defeating the Raid Leader is the info the Arachnos Hostage was supposed to give me, and I really think you should change it, especially since in my case I rescued him on the very back of the room and the raid leader spawned in the middle of the map. Also I find it difficult to comprehend how people know that Anger is the Weakest and Least intelligent of a bunch of Lieutenants of a group that is apparently new and nobody knows anything about it so far.
I guessed that it was my job to find out about them, but it appears that all my character is in charged of is cleaning up the mess. Also if Anger is such a small fry, why make the effort of going after him? Anyway, I guess is just supposed to be this way.

When you typed *peruses the map* you could have done something here like Italics or even another color. Again, make it a little more visually interesting.

Mission 3 :: Using a double negative sentence to refer to the fact that I have yet to let them down is kind of weird here. You might want to check into that.
Also a thing, when a guy that looks like a tank, has enough resources at his disposal and looks powerful enough to take on at the task at hand keeps telling you “help us because we can’t help”, it’s kind of annoying. I understand the story and why neither he nor the police can help, but you don’t have to do it in every mission Dialogue. Is like having States giving you a mission every time and reminding you on every turn why he can’t do it. It’s really a minor thing and it doesn’t affect the story at all, only the storytelling a little.
And again he reminds me the same thing in the Send Off screen.

Also another thing, supposedly this “Sons of Sorrow” thing is like brand new, right? Then how come that Officer Merris knows so much about Anger? You should try to make the story flow a little bit smoother here by subtly hinting your player of what he might encounter, not simply telling him everything it was a secret 2 missions ago.

And, lol, what is wrong with this cop? One moment he’s praising me and pleading for my help and the next he’s telling me: “Hey bud, you’re on your own. You don’t want to go now? Fine by me. Just know that we’re losing men every minute you wait.”
I mean, is like a life and death situation, how can he be so calm and disregard any kind of help I could give, like telling me do what you want, I don’t care, it should be like “I don’t want to tell you how to do your job son, but every minute that Anger is still on the loose, the lives of our brave men and women might be at jeopardy. Please hurry!” or you know, something like that.

There’s a confusing chat bubble here in one of the patrols dialogue, it says “Do you really think that hero would attack”, is it supposed to be like that or “Do you really think that a hero would attack”. I can understand both ways but the second is less confusing.

Well in this part I actually felt excited to see what Anger would look like, and it didn’t disappoint. This mission was actually really exciting, set in a great map, with enough patrols dialogues and encounters to keep you interested.

I love those strange little villains that end up being tortured souls that really want you to kill them, and I’m happy to oblige in some cases. I like that you didn’t make it an AV, an EB is challenging enough and he could even be a Boss character, and this fight will be equally exciting.

The last clue seems to wrap it up nicely for now, what I didn’t like was the last dialogue with our cop friend when he kind of tells you all your hard work was almost no help.

And it hints you Hate is next, leaving you wanting more in this arc. Giving it a feel that is incomplete. But part of the beauty of it is that I actually want to see more of this mysterious phone-using group.

Ok to give you some closing comments, although this review might seem to strain on little details like dialogue and such is because is a really great story. Fun too. And I would like to see it continued and improved.

Rating: **** A Good arc, would play the sequels to finish up the story and would recommend it to my friends and to MA pick up groups as well.
A couple of last minute notes: I understand it might be part of a series of arcs, like for example a trilogy, but adding Part One in the name of the arc might drive some players off, it happened to me before, but no more. Maybe it can help you out.

I would change the Officer Merris contact to like Detective Fish, a more regular like guy for the reasons I stated before. It doesn’t seem necessary he should be the armored PPD suit. But it’s just my opinion.

Really liked the enemy group and their respective description, and I must say they are pretty tough with a 6man. All that –recharge can really drive you up the walls.

The missions also have a nice pace to it, making it easy to read the mission briefing really fast and head into the mish to split some wigs without taking too much of the players’ time.

Also… No souvenir? Well that just makes me sad. I hope you add one in the future, especially since one the clues you get when you defeat Anger is a piece of his cape. Maybe that could be the souvenir.

Many special thanks to the following Pinnacle Players who participated on this MA arc run:
Midnight Faith
Purple Goddess
Soundscape
Red Pheonix 1
Nikkolas

My signature has the URL for the arc I want more reviews. It's called "The calling of the Cult". Altho' I want people to know that they don't have to play mine to get theirs reviewed.

I’ve been thinking this over for quite a while and I decided to finally make this post.

I was reading the threads of reviewers like Venture, dragonslay, DeviousMe and like the general concept of doing a thread almost entirely dedicated to reviewing arcs.

I'm a huge fan of the game, and although I've been playing for less than 2 years, my friends consider me such a CoX freak that for my birthday last October, they baked me 8 small square cakes, putting them all together with the perfect copy of the icons and colors of all the normal inspirations of the game... I've got to upload some photos of that, it was pretty cool actually.

Well, getting back to the main idea for this thread. When I saw the i14 was coming, I knew some things would happen:
First- All of the people would want their arcs reviewed.
Second- Nobody would have the time to review arcs around.
Third- Griefers and the I-gotta-best-everybody-else-around-me types would simply rate some content poorly, without even trying it.

I believe that, as naive as it might sound, in some nice, fancy tool like the MA, we got to help each other out in order to see some high quality content get added to the game.

But don't get me wrong based on my last paragraph, it doesn't mean I'm just going 5 star you all. I'm a firm believer that we have to cull out the weaker elements, like stories that shouldn't have been created to begin with.

Well, please feel free to add any and all arcs you would like me to review, I just want a couple of things to be crystal clear.

I'm a full time student, with a part time job, I have a girlfriend and I take care of our year-and-a-half old baby girl. Meaning that I have tight schedule.
If you post your arc, you are going to have to wait a bit for the review, but I not only will I give you a review, I'll try to go over all the details in your missions.

A couple of specifications and rules first:

-1: I'm not biased by size, length and any form of map and enemy group. But, there are limits. Some threads already have stated something like this, but let me put it up here just in case... There's never a good reason for a defeat all, I'll not rate you badly if it was used with some background story strong enough to support it, but, if I have reasons to believe that you used it just because...
Also I'm looking for a challenge, but not suicide. There's no need to make an impossible Custom Critter group or having 8 AVs in the map for the story to be great.

2- I'll play everything in correction mode, meaning that I'll be looking for typos, grammar errors and the likes. But I don't consider these errors have to cost you any stars if the arc is really solid in its composition. But if you just made typos in all the dialogue options, it will affect your results.

3- I'll try to stay in character the most I can, meaning that if I have to rescue a citizen, I'll think about it depending on the morality that the mission description stated. For example, I might just want to save that citizen in a heroic morality, because I'm a hero and the sole reason that my job exists is because I need to set the example, preserve life at all costs and fight evil and injustice wherever I find it. As a Neutral (mercenary? Rogue?) I might ponder the reasons. Why should I help somebody I don't even know? What's in it for me? And as for Villainous, I consider that there can be several reason why I might want to "rescue" him/her", does it serves my needs? Do I get anything for doing it? Will I see my foes defeated once and for all?
All of the above are examples of things I will be looking for when playing "in character"; if your mission lacks any of such things then, in my opinion, it doesn't have a strong story or a good "character hook" to keep me interested on why I should do this.

4- There's never a good excuse not to use all the features in the MA editor, and leave some with blank spaces. As a tip, if you create a mission with a fight a boss (required for mish completion) and you write nothing down on the "Boss Text"- "Plural-Single Navigational Text", when I play it I'll see the Navigational Compass like this:
_________________________
l"Investigate the disturbances"l
l________Scirroco__________l
If your plan was to keep me in suspense, you failed horribly since I already know Scirroco is the boss. Try to write something like "find some clues" to keep me wondering what's going to happen next.
Please people, write everything down, don't leave holes in your story. This includes custom Critters descriptions. Also the color options are free for you to use. Try them, it might improve the story telling a bit.

5- I have nothing against using your characters/lore/story/villains in the story. If anything I think it can bring some new flavor to the game.
If your arc is about your character, I'll play it.
If he/she is my nanny in every mission, proving that he/she is 1000 times stronger than me in any way, it doesn't matter. I'll try it.
Just keep a couple of things in mind, like for example; some elements should be used sparingly. I don't want a CPU controlled character to hog all the glory for the arc.

You can notice I stated 5 points or guidelines above. Those will be earned or lost stars in a review. You don't need to cater to my taste, but I will use them as a reference for my throughout reviews. On the bright side I hope that I can assist you in improving your arcs and even the plots by giving out constructive criticism.
Well good luck and start posting

Submitting my arc so that Venture can review it:

Arc ID 64859
Name: The Calling of the Cult.
Creator: @Misho
Morality: Neutral
5 Missions long, map 1-2-4 are small 3-5 are unique and medium to big.
Length according to MA descriptor: Very Long.
Aprox. Length from previous players' runs: Not so long.
Custom Group.
EB/AV included.
Party recommended altho' not needed.

Looking for constructive criticism.

Arc ID 64859
Name: The Calling of the Cult. (First Chapter)
Creator: @Misho
Morality: Neutral
5 Missions long, Map 1-2-4 are small, 3-5 are medium-long.
Length according to MA descriptor: Very Long.
Level Range: Some mishes will auto sk you to minimum levels depending on map. I could say the lvl range I would suggest is when you are able to solo an EB and up.
Aprox. Length from previous players' runs: Not so long.
Custom Group.
EB/AV included.
Party recommended altho' not needed.

Try to read all the clues, texts, descriptions and such. Sometimes it might even hint you of something.

I'm afraid of even posting here, but if I don't know how to improve my arc if I don't try and promote it some way.

Here it goes:

Arc ID 64859
Name: The Calling of the Cult. (First Chapter)
Creator: @Misho
Morality: Neutral
5 Missions long, Map 1-2-4 Small Map 3-5 Medium or so (honestly I felt them small, but I really like them and run well with the story...
Length according to MA descriptor: Very Long.
Aprox. Length from previous players' runs: Not so long.
Custom Group.
EB/AV included.
Party recommended altho' not needed.

My advise: try to read everything, and not everything is a must complete objective.
Looking for Feedback to further improve my arc story. I want to make this the first part out of three. But will wait to see if people likes the concept.

Submitting my arc for review:
Arc ID 64859
Name: The Calling of the Cult.
Creator: @Misho
Morality: Neutral
5 Missions long, Maps 1-2-4 are small, map 3 and 5 are medium.
Length according to MA descriptor: Very Long.
Aprox. Length from previous players' runs: Not so long.
Custom Group.
EB/AV included.
Party recommended altho' not needed.

Really hoping you can get around to play my arc, will be waiting on reviews either here on as a response to my post, for which you can use the link to find it.
As an advise, read every clue, help window green chat enemy conversation, still busy and even the souvenir.

Thanks in advance

Well from reading the press realease I can gather a couple of things: First, they are going to introduce Dual Pistols and Demon Summoning powers. Second, I think Villains will be able to walk on Paragon City when they "redeem" themselves, turning good or rogue, and vice versa for Heroes who have gone Bad. Not to discourage the idea of all the zones being now PVP but from that concept, I think the game would stay the same in that matter.
Meaning there could be no pvp in zones like Steel Canyon or Port Oakes since "good" villains and "bad" heroes would simply switch sides.

There could be an advantage in a way that is that you would bring you archetype to the other side. Who knows what could happen with all the "good" MM there's gonna be or all the "bad" defenders that are gonna pop up.

Another thing is, as people have mentioned before, this is going to be like CoV or the Good vs Evil Edition. You are going to have to Buy it in order to use the new content.

I think there's gonna be a new zone like the Outbreak and the Breakout, so that you experience the new gray material first handed. There's also gonna be like a moral compass, probably like a meter were you earn or lose points, getting closer to being more heroic or villanous.

***This is what I can gather from reading the info they have sent us***

Also one other thing I can presume is the following: The new alternate dimension, the Praetorian Earth or whatever, will be a new collection of zones, like Paragon City or even the Rogue Isles are.

***Interesting fact, the ruler's name is Emperor Cole, but since States' name is Marcus Cole, we can only presume Tyrant has switched his name***

[ QUOTE ]

I'd be happy for you to play and rate either of the arcs in my signature. Be advised, "A Show to Die For!" is probably the more solo-friendly of the two (though still challenging), but I've received less feedback on "Queen of the Jinn," so the choice is yours. Thanks in advance, and I hope I was able to help!

[/ QUOTE ]

Lol, when I logged in I saw that I had, not only play this mish already, but actually rate it too. I gave it a 5 stars. I will proceed then to play your other arc.

Very well, I've taken into consideration all this tips and will correct all the issues I can as soon as I log in. I've been away since I was in the beach for this weekend, and was really surprised to see any replies to my post.

Feedback like this is what I need to improve my story. One fact is that unfortunately I completed and published this arc at 99.84% capacity, so there's really no room to include some important stuff as for example. "Why the cult wants me dead?" Which is something I really gotta add....

I will see what I can do to add a little more spice to the maps and more dialogue to the arc.

Well, the patch download is complete and ready now, so I'll get to "reviewing" mode in order for all the arcs in the signatures.

Arc ID 64859
Name: The Calling of the Cult. (First Chapter)
Creator: @Misho
Morality: Neutral
5 Missions long, every map is small.
Length according to MA descriptor: Very Long.
Aprox. Length from previous players' runs: Not so long.
Custom Group.
EB/AV included.
Party recommended altho' not needed.

Basically this arc started as an idea I had a long time ago that gave me the idea for my main character. However this arc has no reference to my character at all.
Actually when I created it I wanted to make it so that yours is the main character, involved in something it doesn't even expect. This is only the first part of the three I want to make in total.

First thing I noticed after I made it is that is mighty hard to get people to play your arc.
So I decided to announce my arc here on the forum. And will appreciate if you could all help me improve in any way possible.
You see, english is not my primary language so I might have a lot of grammar errors and typos and what-not. So I always need to proof read everything I just typed just in case.

But I also like to know feedback about other things. Like for example, did you enjoyed the story? Do you think the custom group was well thought out? How you like the contact? Is the story easy to follow or too complicated?

All of this is because in my modest hopes I would like to someday achieve the Writer badge (To receive the accolade:P) by having people play by arc. But I'm only up to author, and from the looks of it, unless I start promoting my arc somehow, I will never get any further.

So please feel free to play my arc, give me feedback either in game or as a reply here and I will play yours and return the favor.

Maybe if you all feel creative, you can post how would you like for the second and third part to continue as I'm still writing them and I could use some fresh Ideas.

Ooh btw, please enter your Arc Ids and names as a reply here so that I can keep a better track of the stories you want me to play.

[ QUOTE ]
My arc:
Tsoo Faced
#1120
Very long - Heroic
5 missions
Synopsis: The Tsoo begin an uncharacteristic rash of break ins across the city. They're obviously looking for something. What it is may come as a surprise - even to them.

[/ QUOTE ]

First of all I want to say, 5 stars, it has everything a good arc should entail, such as fast-paced missions, an easy-to-follow plot and an even easier to understand plot twist.
Regarding each mission:

Mission 1: Took me less than a minute to complete, although it`s not really a complaint, the two blinkies were in the first room in the warehouse, and judging from the size of the mini map, it was probably a medium sized warehouse map to a large one. It was kinda dissapointing that I touched a couple of blinkies and mission was over. But still it´s only the first assignment, so no real issue there.

Mission 2: First of all, when you are creating material, you tend to forget that sometimes, people who aren´t you tend to not know exactly all that you presume as obvious, my point being, the navigational thingie said, "Xob laim" as on of the objectives... What is a Xob laim, can you eat it? You wear it? It turns out that you fight it, and all this time I was looking for a blinkie or something. It´s only my humble opinion, but you should really just write it like "Defeat Xob Laim" It´s easier to understand. The CoT hostage was a nice touch, but after I rescued Appalanix he just stood there, even tho he said something about having to leave right away. I understand this is the MA fault´s, not yours, but you could have played with that like "I´m going to deliver the news to my brothers about this whole mess as soon as you clear this whole place" Or you know something. But that is not really that important anyhow.

Mission 3: Ok here I couldn´t reach a single Battle between the CoT and the Tsoo, and only could watch some of the dialogue. Since basically this is going to happen a lot, you could make on of the dialogues of the CoT, which says that they will not accept any interference from them and you! (with the you meaning obviously the player, but since I never did reach them, it sounds weird,a t least in the situation I was at) It could be like "We will suffer no interference whatsoever, kill them all." That involves the player in a way and keeps dialogue more real, since unless an average CoT minion is all knowing, they haven`t accounted the meddling hero.

Mission 4: Really nice done here, Tou Vue was a nice touch here, although in the mission briefing was something I didn´t fully understood so I assumed a typo. When the contact is telling you about Tou Vue and Xob laim he mentions Tu Cib... Who is Tu Cib, there has been no reference to him or her up to this point and its not mentioned again. I will not put all the briefing here as to not Spoil the story, but if you meant Tou Vue instead of Tu Cib, you should really correct it.

Mission 5: Altho´is not a requirement, it felt a little anticlimatic not having a boss in this mission, I´m not talking about an AV fight. But you know something else than to destroy an object and be done with it. Altho´it could be thatyou Did include a boss there, I missed it entirely. And I searched really well. This can sometimes happen when you set a blinkie and a boss in a map set that really doesn´t work in your advantage, putting them in complete different rooms. But again maybe you didn´t put any boss to begin with, so it´s okay.

Overall I think it´s a 5 stars arc. It has some nice play on words, like the title which plays well with the story. The clues where nice, easy to follow and helpful, and the story was fun.


My arc:
The Calling of the Cult.

Creator: @Misho
Morality: Neutral

Difficulty: Medium to hard. *Party Recommended*
Some mishes will be high end stuff.

Arc ID 64859

5 Missions, Very Long, Archvillian Fights. Party recommended.

Typos and grammatical errors will most probably appear often. The reason is that english is not my primary language and sometimes the ideas I have, are difficult to translate. I`ve been advised to proof read my story. And will do so in the future, but I need more feed back > I advise you to read every clue and such. Even bosses and custom groups info. This will give you some clues.