Doctor Coyote waved the ray gun around.
"In my hand is the key to the end of darkness! A true end to the last Century!! The shining path of knowledge and enlightenment awaits!!!"
Ignoring what she believed was a mock snoring sound from within the assembled audience, Doctor Coyote made her way to the stage.
"Long have I slaved over this miraculous device!"
She grabbed the podium with her free left hand. A feedback whine burst out over the speakers. She winced.
Ping!
"And now, I shall show you the true power of Science!!!"
The last sentence was spat out quickly as she fumbled in her bag for a test tube rack, which was duly produced and planted on the flat surface.
"Those of you who know me, know that I am so committed to my work, nay my ART, that I am more than prepared to experiment upon myself. Some have called me mad, but that is not a term I am afraid of!!"
She pulled a bung from a test tube and poured out its contents: to the untrained eye they looked like iron filings, yet they emitted a curious smell of compost.
"But I digress! Let me ask you, citizens of the Rogue Isles, esteemed colleagues from the mainland," the next sentence swerved dangeorusly into infomercial territory, "have you ever found yourself alone, facing the housework, perhaps too bored and disinterested to tackle the dishes, or too busy watching your shows to vacuum your expensive study carpet?"
There was a gap in the spiel: No one filled the void.
PING!
"Well," sweat poured off of Doctor Coyote, "with my patented Grow-A-Helper technology, you don't need to worry about that anymore!!!"
Doctor Coyote aimed the ray gun at the mound of matter and fired. Before the eyes of the assembled masses, the energy reacted with the material and an acrid smoke poured out.
"Behold!!! The Grow-A-Helper!!!!!"
PING!
The final fastening on Coyote's corset came undone, and with it an avalanche of flesh pressed outwards on the catsuit.
There was a fruity ripping noise, a shriek from several of the more sensitive memebers of the audience, and a final scream from Coyote as not only was she exposing more flesh than was decent, but the Grow-A-Helper had developed and then begun to deteriorate into tiny pieces:
Each piece became a smaller version of the humanoid shape of the 'Helper. And Coyote watched in amazement as one by one, the little blighters crawled up her legs, attempting to 'fix' the problem of the collapsing catsuit.
"Get them off me! Get them off me!!! Aaaargh!!!!!"
Doctor Wilhelmina Edna Coyote, Mad Scientist, collapsed in a heap of bio-organic creatures.
Edward was enjoying himself...he was enjoying himself so very much, so far stuff had exploded and a woman had exposed herself on the center stage...today was generally a good day for amusement. This was more fun than any casual villainy any day, heck it was more fun than going to the movies!
However...he was up next, he moved to casually push the struggling Dr Coyote aside with his foot, barely managing to push that fleshy mass out the way.
"Alright my turn I feel...ladies, gentlemen and esteemed judges, behold the latest of my amazing inventions it will astound and amaze you all, behold...the amazing Growthatron!"
He pulled back the sheet revealing a rather bodged together looking utility belt strapped to a manniquinn, it wasn't as impressive as he had made out...but time had been short.
"Watch in wonder as I both grow AND shink using this wonderous belt, you shall all be in awe of it's majesty!"
Unclipping the belt from manniquinn and placing it around his waist.
"Behold as I shrink down to the height of..."
He pressed a button...the shrinking wasn't very impressive, infact it was probably a couple of inches at most, the Doctor being a small man already.
"...the height of five foot five inches and watch as I grow to the height of..."
He pressed another button...yeah he was taller but not THAT tall, infact one could say he was decidely average in height for the super powered people of the Rogue Isles.
"...six foot six inches!"
Edward looked at the audience who...were not amazed...sure it hadn't blown up...yet...but it was hardly a scientific achievement, going to the facemaker could add one mass muscle AND height with ease.
"Never again shall you suffer the tyranny of high shelves or small doors, never again will Supermarkets be the bane of your existence....never again will..."
It begun with a loud whinning noise...followed by an even louder rumble.
"Oh gods...get this thing off me...it's going to blow, the growth matrix is unstable!"
Then, in a zapping, flashing way, the belt and his trousers disappeared, leaving a rather crispy looking Edward, exposed in his tighty whitey underwear. He sighed and held out his hand for a new pair of trousers from Steve as he walked off stage.
"Well...there goes my award..." slipping in to his new pair of trousers with a sigh...
Leeches cleared her throat, and stood up from a chair at the back somewhere one of her scientists hurried in behind her pushing a table with a small ball looking device on it. She was a bit confused by this device herself, its principle seemed sound why didn't she use it?
Anyway back to the point at hand, she cleared her throat a second time and finally a few people noticed her.
"My turn I believe?
She walked on to the stage followed by the scientists pushing the table who was looking rather weary and nervous, Leeches smirked, this was going to be easy.
"People of the gathered press and others, I bring to you an amazing invention, following rather a theme it seems. Anyway to run my experiment I require a object from the audiance".
She opened up a umbrella as somone pelted a rotten tomato at her and she muttered something about everyone being a critic and swore quietly unaware that the microphone had picked it up and some in the audiance were looking outraged. She lowered the umbrella, glared into the audiance and said in a forced calm voice.
"Something more practical please".
Someone threw a pink bunny slipper at her and she snatched it out the air with a grumble and turned to the small spherical machine.
"Now this machine could save costs and the environment, this machine will amaze you, despite your understandable doubts observe the future!
She nodded to the scientist who seemed to be asleep standing up, she then walked over and slapped him with the slipper. He then snapped to attention and turned the machine on. eight spider like legs popped out of the side of it and the front of the machine slid open. She had forgotten this one was mobile, oh well that shouldn't be a problem.
"Now observe, what this machine does is picks dust particles from the air itself and through a matter transforming process can replicate almost anything the Matter Alteration Device as I call it represents the ultimate in cheap harmless production machines".
She was losing some of the audiance to sleep, a few jeered and one or two were getting ready to leave. So this was it, time to test it. She pressed a button on the machine and it scanned the slipper and there was a shudder and a loud belch like noise from it and after a while of this it belched out two pink fluffy bunny slippers.
"Behold my genius!
However, at that point the machine saw a dog run passed a window and scuttled off the table and through the audiance to chase the dog. It's travel scanners however left much to be desired and as several members of the audiance ran and scrambled out of the way of the machine it managed to replicate one pair of grey trousers, one black loafer and one red high heel shoe. Before smashing into a wall and flipping on its back like a dead spider, making one last belch sound and venting black smoke and making a noise like a collection of broken springs.
Leeches saw this in barely disguised horror and quietly walked off the stage to slow clapping and laughter, her scientist scrambled to pick up the machine, she sat back on her seat brooding quietly and feeling humiliated though less so than the last two scientists she supposed. The the scientist ran over to her and waved the machine in front of her.
"Look! I managed to save it!
"No you fool put it down, get it away from me its ticking!
Before the scientist could follow the directions the machine exploded blowing leeches hair backwards and covering her face in black soot and sending her falling on her back off her seat, she sighed bitterly and spat out a cloud of dust and sat back on her chair swearing and crossing her arms brooding angrilly this time and the scientist was still standing there like he was holding the machine though there was now nothing in his hand and he took his glasses off revealing the only clean skin left on his face.
"Ooops".
Leeches sunk her face in her hands, ok maybe she had been humiliated pretty badly after all. Next time she was going to test these things before bringing them to show off!
The end is just a new beginning, Goodbye all my coh friends and even the enemies, its been a blast I will miss you all. Thank you Paragon team, you gave me a home from home I will always appriciate it.
Signa leaned heavily against the Halls wall , his Robotic body shock was he giggled and strove to prevent an all out laughing fit from bursting forth.
The man with the size changing belt was funnier than the clowns he has seen on TV last week .
Though there looked to be little he could salvage or ..erhm borrow from the show he was having such a fun time, he forgot himself and a snorting laugh snuck out from his drawing a lot of unwanted attention
.
In the corner of the room, a small section of the wall seemed to distort. Brick work started to bend and fold and wood panels spun in place before there was a rather comical *POP*, signaling the arrival by teleportation of a large jolly man with big bushy hair and a beard, wearing a brown lab coat maybe one size too small and large brass power gauntlets just tucked into the sleeve.
The jolly man laughed, the large lab goggles propped onto his curly hair shook free and went down over his eyes, "Good evening patrons of SCIENCE! I hope I'm not too late, am I? I am Doctor Eremianaiepus and I wish to partake in the competition!" He laughed heartily at the crowd before stopping and looking rather serious. "Right after I've been to the lavatory. It's in the back I'm guessing?" He did not wait for an answer though, deciding to just walk off aimlessly, letting whoever was next in line show off their work.
I am the Blaster, I have filled the role of Tank, Controller and Defender
Sometimes all at once.
Union EU player! Pip pip, tally ho, top hats and tea etc etc
A balded man stood up. He was wearing a grey suit for the occassion. So much different then his usual brown dustcoat. At first glance he was a bit dull looking which also resulted in him almost not being noticed in the exotic crowd. An older man... but his stance showed he had more energy then you would expect from him. Maybe that came from the many cybernetic replacement parts his body was rich. Like the left cybernetic eye and his heart and long. His name was Dr. Eugene Silver, and robotic science was his expertise.
Eugene gave a soft cough... drawing attention to himself. "I guess it would be my turn then...", he said and walked to the stage. "My name is Silver... Dr. Eugene Silver... Robotics is my speciality. Like so many of you." He looked around... and still thought himself a bit out of place. Weird scientists indeed... he was an evil genius maybe.
"I went and made science fiction reality... but instead of building a bigger robot I made them smaller... a lot smaller. Only.. I cannot test it myself. You see... I need hair to do that.", he rubbed his head and smiled. "Any volunteer from the audience?"
While he looked around for any to come over he started to explain what he had done... "I made nano-bots that are able to change your hair color. Great for parties or infiltration..." Eugene took a small tube from his pocket. "So... anyone willing to assist?"
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Among others, a couple of twisted-looking science students were laughing out loud, probably at the idea of using Nanotechnology for something so mundane. When the so called Doctor Silver asked for volunteers, the two students cruelly shoved the bespectacled dorky-looking girl in front of them, pushing her onto the stage. "A cure for you Meredith" they teased, laughing and snorting. The poor girl now had no other choice but to be experimented on. Face hung low from sheer humiliation; she climbed up to meet the roboticist, her white lab coat reluctantly dragging along after her.
"Ah, a volunteer...", Eugene said with a smile. "Ofcourse I wanted to use these for some worldshattering effect... eh... but better start small yes..?!", with that he casually emptied the vial over the girls head.
It only took a few seconds before the color of her hair changed to a bright green. Eugene looked at the label on the vial again and mumbled something that sounded like "...I programmed THAT color?!..." But quickly looked back at the audience with a big smile as if this was all planned... "Voila! I always liked green..."
"As I said... they can be programmed to change other parts of the easy to manipulate DNA structure but I have to think about that. Tough skin maybe... or red eyes...", he smiled again and walked away from the stage real glad he came up with something that absolutly couldn't blow up. Now if no-one would wonder where the nano-bots stayed after they did their job he was set.
- The Italian Job: The Godfather Returns #1151
Beginner - Encounter a renewed age for the Mook and the Family when Emile Marcone escapes from the Zig!
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Average - A new race of aliens arrives on Earth. And Vanguard has you investigate them!
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Advanced - Go back in time and witness the birth of a vampire. Follow her to key moments in her life in order to stop her! A story of intrigue, drama and horror! Blood & Violence... not recommend to solo!
The prone figure of Doctor Coyote, kick rolled to the side of the stage by him, had forgotten all about the tiny bio-organic helpers.
"He touched me! He touched me!!" she murmured quietly to herself.
If the woman had seen Edward in his underpants, she may well have had a heart attack and died.
In the far corners of the assembly hall, tiny figures leapt about looking for an escape.
Professor O'Reilly and Professor Bright both looked at each other with a sort of failed expression. So far the students were winning the so called professionals in terms of creative ideas. "Okay so what do we have so far?" asked Bright.
"There has been a solar reflector from Muffin that backfired" O'Reilly answered. "Miniature clones from Coyote with body-swelling side effects, a height-altering formula from Mechano that proved unstable, a replication machine from Leeches that went out of control, and hair-dyeing supposedly gene-altering nanotechnology from Silver. At least that's one thing that's actually worked in demonstration so far."
"Hmm" said Bright, in deep thought. "I have a mind to make them all drop down and give me a hundred for this epic fail!"
"Let us wait and see what Eremianaiepus and the others have to offer, hey?" said O'Reilly, looking onward to the gathered scientists.
Doctor Muffin simply fell into his chair with an air of defeat and his face dropped into a sulk. He watched with peaked interest as Doctor Coyote made her entre dramatis and then peered curiously at the weapon in her grasp. He watched on, waiting for a speech and mini-demonstration.