I just played through the mission. A great concept. Several minor elements detract from the whole, however.
You mention Mad Marco both in the creature descriptions and in a patrol conversation, but never flesh out his identity nor why his gators roam the sewers. You could offer some clues, or fuller description to explain this fellow and his goals.
You should offer a souvenir to end the mission. Perhaps those alligator-skin boots you refer to as the exit text.
The grammar and word choice can be considerably tightened. Many commas ought to be added, for example, and more action verbs.
Again, the concept is funny, the creatures are not overwhelming nor walk-overs, and the pacing is good. Just a bit of polishing.
@Elisenda
(A Lame Joke, 22982)
(Fine Literature, 136522)
Gonna try this over the weekend.
My Arc, #171149 "A helping hand can lead to broken fingers" starts off with you (and your team *hint*hint) headed to the AP sewers to help some rookies, and get more than you bargined for.
Looking forward to your version !
Virtue: Sistah Powah, Afrodizziac, NeutronBlonde,Distortionist,IonMaiden,BlindFaith,M adwoman, Vital Signs,Yzzorrdrex,Diesel Mage, Defend, Glasshouse,Rescue I, Bootytrap, The Experience, AE Virus, Drawback, Daytime, Nighttime, Chamberwraith, Invincible Ink, Monster Mitts, Hex Object, Hexperiment, Frightningbolt, Spooky Deville, Scream Weaver, Cackler, Shocktopus, Ogrekill,Road Hazard,Fahrenhate,Duotherm,Black Lung, Horrorculturalist,Foulmouth,
Everyone has been on that aggravating sewer team of noobs right? Well now you have to save those lovable stereotypes in "The Great Sewer Rescue".
ARC #102898
MORALITY: HEROIC
LENGTH: SHORT
Be sure to leave your arc# and I will return the favor. Please be patient if your arc is long.
ARC # 2517 "Everybody Was Kung Fu Fighting"
ARC# 102898 "The Great Sewer Rescue"