Here in the darkness, all can be real, all can be yours. You must but wish for it. It sounds like a fairy tale, like a beautiful dream hiding an ominous secret. And yet, that which we cannot see in the darkness feels so much more real than that which we can see and hear and touch. The fear one feels, alone in the dark, is much greater than any terror of the waking world. And, just as well, the dreams one dreams, the dreams one wishes were true, are more real than reality itself. Light brings knowledge. Light brings reason. But light also brings pain. The pain of a cruel, uncaring world where beauty dies and happiness is an illusion. Light brings misery. It is the darkness that brings desire. In the darkness, all that we want to believe in, all that we wish to have, all that we dream of doing
Can be real.
We yearn, all of us, for a better life, a different life, a life created just as we would create it. But that is not what life is. That is not how life is. That is not what is real. But what is real, at the end of the day? When the light fades and darkness comes, when the mind rests and surrenders to its own emotions, what is truly, really real? Is it the world that surrounds us, or is it the world deep within us? Is it better to deny what we want, or is it better to surrender to it, to live it, if just for a moment? It may not be true, but that doesnt make it any less real. And at the end of the day, when light gives way to darkness, when sight gives way to thought, and when understanding gives way to dream
In the end, what is it that really matters?
He did not know. In darkness he sat, his path back to reality open to him and waiting. Yet he did not take it. Where hed come from, he didnt want to go back. Where he was, he was because that is what he wanted. He had sought out the mythical monster in the darkness, wanted to share in its dream, to share its desire. He knew full well what the consequences of his actions were, but he had already made his choice. He had already chosen which reality he would believe in. And if the monster denied him, he would just have to wait until it changed its mind
Or until the reality he rejected finally claimed his life. Either way, he had little left to lose.
Days went on, and the voice remained silent. Yet the darkness did not feel empty in the least. There was a presence there, sneaking, skulking, quietly watching and never straying far. The darkness watched him, and in his blindness, he watched back. But he was mortal, and in a waiting game, his immortal adversary would surely win. In time, thirst and hunger ravaged his body. Eventually, the elements seemed like they would exact their final toll. And as he stared death in the face, he finally admitted defeat.
He: Well, I guess you win, creature. You wanted me gone, and pretty soon I will be. I didnt get what I came for, but at least I tried.
The silence stirred. The darkness rippled. An undeniable, unsettling and at the same time indescribable feeling pierced the air. And in the quiet of the black, a voice spoke.
Voice: No
He: No?
Voice: No, you will not die
A strange kind of tension hung in the air. What did the voice mean?
He: I keep telling myself that, but unless youd like to offer me some food and water, I dont think I can keep convincing myself of that.
Voice: Look behind you
The voice trailed off as he turned around. And then he beheld something he could scarcely believe. Like ink floating in water, the darkness receded, leaving behind it an enormous pile of the tastiest, most scrumptious-looking food one could imagine. Was this a trick? Was this just a dream? An illusion, perhaps, born of the death rattle of a decaying body? Was it real? Instinct insisted that he pounce on this opportunity, but his heart had questions.
He: Why did you
Voice: Dont ask. And dont you dare thank me! Just
Eat. Then leave. You have to leave this place.
He: I will accept your hospitality, creature. But you are a bigger fool than me if you think I will listen.
Voice: Look, I can take the food away just like I gave it.
He: Really? Then why dont you? You dont want me here. What easier way to get rid of me than simply letting me starve?
Voice: Ooh! Damn you! FINE! Do whatever you want!
The voice disappeared in anger once again, but its threat did not materialize. The vital food it had offered remained, just waiting for him to satiate himself on it. And the creature itself did not stray far. It made it seem like it stormed off into the depths of the abyss, but he could feel it was close. Always close, always looking. He had heard many legends about this ravenous beast, but in its direct presence, none of them felt even the slightest bit true. This was no feral monster that existed for the sole purpose of trapping travellers and taking their lives. It was something else. Something else entirely.
It wasnt light where he stood, but it wasnt darkness, either. It was as if the blackness of the void had receded from around him. He could see, just about, but it was more because the darkness allowed him than anything else. His host had given him a little corner where he was safe and secure. Which is strange, considering it wanted him out. Considering it was supposed to want to kill him. A little spot where he stood alone. But he was never truly alone. His companion was always there, always watching from the darkness. Hiding, it seemed, out of sight, but never out of mind.
Until the day it spoke to him.
Voice: Why wont you leave?
He: Why do you want me out?
Voice: Why do you keep doing that?!?
He: Doing what?
Voice: You answer every question with a riddle or another question!
He: I
Guess because I dont have an answer.
Voice: How can you not have an answer? You came here fully knowing you would lose your life, and you dont have an answer as to why?
He: Do you find it that surprising?
Voice: You did it again!
He: Im sorry
Voice: Yes, I do find it that surprising. How can someone do something like that for no reason at all?
He: I never said I didnt have a reason. I only said I had no answer.
Voice: Come again?
He: You know, Im surprised at you. You are supposed to be the dreamweaver, a creature of darkness who makes a mans dreams seem more real than reality itself. Yet you are unable to understand how I can do something that I want, even though I know its going to get me killed? Really?
Voice: You shouldnt believe everything people say
He: Youre right. People spend their entire lives looking for things to be afraid, even if they have to exaggerate and make up wild stories.
Voice: What, you think theres nothing to be afraid of in the world?
He: Honestly
No, I dont believe there is.
Voice: Ha! Then you are a fool! What of the hungry animal which means to kill and eat you? Do you not fear that?
He: No, I respect that.
Voice: What?
He: An animal fights to survive, and if it has to, it will kill for its food. Just like I do when I survive in the wilderness. Its the natural way of things.
Voice: But it wants to kill you!
He: No, it doesnt. It wants to survive. Just like we all want to. What right do I have to condemn it for that? No, I respect the animal for wanting to survive, and I do not judge it.
Voice: But
He: And I do not judge you.
Voice: What? No
He: You do what you do because you need to. You have to survive. Just like I would kill an animal to eat it, just like an animal would kill me for food, so you do what you do to survive. Others may demonise and fear you, but I do not. I respect your right to live, as I respect any other creature.
Voice: No, no, no!
He: Whats wrong?
Voice: Argh! Would you stop doing that?!?
He: Doing what?
Voice: You cant say things like that!
He: Things like what? What did I do?
Voice: Why... Why are you doing this to me?
A profound feeling of sadness pierced his heart, a feeling the source of which he could not comprehend. But the voice was gone, and the creatures presence had gone with it. Blind and confused, he knew not what had happened. He knew only a single thing that he had hurt this strange creature whos den he refused to leave, and hurt it badly. Why, he couldnt know, but that had been the farthest from his intentions.
He: Im sorry! I didnt mean to hurt you!
He shouted into the darkness, but got no response. Something had happened. Something unexpected. Something that hurt in a way that didnt seem logical at all. But what? And why? There was no answer. Only darkness. Only quiet. Only the dream of what could be, without the knowledge of what is. Again, he had a choice. He felt like he should apologise to his host and leave as he had been asked. It was the right thing to do after what had happened. But he didnt. He stayed. He stayed not because of his conviction, not this time. He stayed not for whatever reason it was that had brought him there originally. Why he stayed, he didnt even understand. But he felt that there was more to do, more to see. That perhaps... Perhaps the dream could be real. That somehow, maybe, what we do not see in the darkness will somehow end up being what he wanted it to be.
Somehow...
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Arcanaville
Samuel_Tow is the only poster that makes me want to punch him in the head more often when I'm agreeing with him than when I'm disagreeing with him.
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To live is to die, slowly, day by day. To live dying... But to dream... To dream, that is something else entirely. To dream is to die living. To abandon the real world, abandon our survival, abandon all the things that our bodies force us to do. To live, happy, complete and fulfilled, if even just for a moment. When darkness comes and dreams replace reality, one has to wonder... What is it that really matters? Is it worth denying your dream, safe in the knowledge that the light of dawn will bring the pain back, or is it better to commit yourself to this dream, to abandon all reality, and to commit yourself to it? How much value should one put in a life filled with pain and hardship? How much, when a moment in a beautiful dream can be worth so much more?
We all know that the light of dawn will always come and chase away the dreams. It is the way of things. Or is it? If it just so happens that the light never comes, how can you tell what is real, and what is merely a desire, manifesting itself to us because we want it to be true, rather than because it is true? When morning never comes, it is so very easy to lose ourselves in the dream, to blur the boundary between the darkness and the light, between waking and dream. But perhaps it is for the best. The waking world makes our decisions for us, and we survive merely by recognising these correct decisions and following them. But the dream in darkness is free. We are free to choose, free to be in a place that is perfect, that is right. And when the boundary weakens, so does our resolve to follow the right choices of the world, whatever consequences they may have.
And so he stayed in the darkness for no real reason than because he felt he should. His body told him he should leave and escape the very real mortal danger. His mind told him he should leave, for his chance to get what he came for was gone. And yet his heart begged him to stay... Just because.
Days turned into weeks, and yet the mysterious presence still would not return. The food and supplies were never-ending, the darkness held back, and the feeling of dread and danger seemed to have disappeared. In its place, a cold emptiness hung in the air. It seemed as though all hope had left. Finally, his resolve faltered. It seemed the dream was dead, and he turned to leave. Just then, the darkness rippled, and a voice rang from all directions.
Voice: Wait!
He: What?
Voice: Are you... Leaving?
He: I thought thats what you wanted?
Voice: Yes... Yes, it was...
He: What is going on here?
Voice: What are you talking about?
He: Last time you were screaming at me to go, now you sound like youre not even sure you want me to leave!
Voice: Thats not true!
He: Isnt it?
A simple question, one would think, but as it rang in the darkness, the voice fell silent. It had no answer to give.
He: Its true, isnt it? You dont want me to leave, do you?
Voice: Please dont do this to me...
The once seductive, confident voice was reduced to little more than a gasping whimper.
He: Do what? I dont understand anything!
Voice: Please, just stop...
He: What is it?!? Have you been toying with me all this time? Is that what you do?
Voice: No, I...
He: Come on! Kill me! Kill me like you did to all the others!
Voice: I dont want to!
A powerful shout roared like thunder, and again, the darkness lifted for a mere moment. Again that same strange face flashed in his eyes, a still shot of a terrible revelation. This was not the face of a bestial creature. It was the face of a woman, covered in tears and contorted in deep, deep sadness.
He: Why? Why dont you want to kill me?
Voice: Because I dont want to... I never did. I never wanted to kill anybody. All of these men... All of them... Screaming... Begging for their lives... Their pain, I... I can still feel it... All the pain... All the suffering...
He: You... You never wanted any of this, did you?
Voice: Its funny, isnt it?
The voice spoke through the tears of an ancient creature as the darkness whined in the background.
Voice: Me, the all-powerful dreamweaver, crying like a little girl. Im supposed to be the demon in the darkness, the terror of the underworld, and here I am, just...
He: Dont.
Voice: What... Do you mean?
The voice spoke in halting sentences.
He: Dont do this to yourself.
Voice: Heh, thats funny, considering its you who did that to me...
He: Im sorry I didnt understand this earlier, and Im sorry about what I did.
Voice: Its not your fault... I... I just couldnt bring myself to kill you. Its my own fault.
He: Not wanting to kill is not something to be ashamed of.
Voice: All of the others, they... They werent like you. They all came here looking... Ah, hell, I dont even know what they wanted. But they were all pigs. The lot of them. Cut-throats, murderers, monsters... All of them were horrible... I... I didnt want to kill any of them, I didnt, but... But I just told myself that they deserved it. They were... Bad... Deserved to die. I didnt have a choice, I had to kill, but... But they deserved it...
He: I understand...
Voice: No, you dont! I wanted to hate you, I wanted to want to kill you! But I just... Couldnt... You didnt come here to loot and plunder, didnt come for selfish gain... You came to me to die... Youre not a bad person, and I just... Just cant...
He: Listen to me! You did nothing wrong.
Voice: Yes, you respect me for preying on people, I get it!
He: Thats not what I mean. You need to kill to survive, but you feel pity for your victims.
Voice: Yes, Im weak like that! Thanks! Just go away!
He: Youre not weak. Quite the opposite.
Voice: What do you mean?
He: Living doesnt take courage. You do what you have to. Sometimes its unpleasant, sometimes its ugly, and sometimes its downright horrible. But you do what you have to. Thats how things are.
Voice: What are you saying?
He: Im saying that when the time comes to choose between life and death, then life is the easy choice. Every fibre of your body, every part of your being is screaming Live! Live! It doesnt take courage to listen to that. Living doesnt take courage. Its the right choice to make. Dying is what takes real courage. To choose to die... Thats the hardest choice there is to make.
The voice did not respond, and silence once again ruled the darkness. But though there were no words to hear, there was something very real to feel. A presence, both hidden in the pitch black of the darkness, and at the same time so blindingly obvious it could not be denied. And a presence that felt closer. So much closer.
He: Listen, Ill leave you if I make you feel bad...
Voice: No! Please... Stay...
He: But I thought you said...
Voice: Please dont make me say it. Just... Stay.
He: Well, I dont really have anywhere else to go anyway. Plus, your food is delicious! Muh-hum! Id have to be an idiot to pass up that kind of opportunity. And, now I know youre a softy and you wont kill me, so how can I pass up that kind of an opportunity?
Voice: Dont push your luck, smarty! I might still lop off an a body part.
He: Wow, then this really will cost me an arm and a leg!
Voice: Aw! That was so bad it actually hurt!
Though the voice said so, a soft, jubilant giggle wafted in the wind. The creature which was so sad mere moments ago appeared to have perked up quite a bit.
Voice: Listen, I... Need to be alone for a while. But Ill be back soon!
He: Dont worry about me. Im not going anywhere. Im hungry!
And so the creature sunk back into the darkness, while he sat down to eat once again. But something had changed. The food tasted sweeter, more delicious than it ever had. Was this the creatures doing, a sort of gesture of good will? Or was it just a state of mind, the satisfaction of doing a good thing? Well... Does it really matter? In the darkness, that which you desire can be much more real than that which is. When the line between the waking world and the world of dreams washes away, everything becomes possible for no reason other than because thats what feels right. And was this a dream, or was it real? For all it mattered, it might as well have been real.
The relationship between these two very odd creatures seemed too improbable to be real, but in the darkness of the void, who could claim otherwise? Real or imaginary, this relationship... Was just beginning.
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Arcanaville
Samuel_Tow is the only poster that makes me want to punch him in the head more often when I'm agreeing with him than when I'm disagreeing with him.
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Wow. I am loving the start here..
[ QUOTE ]
To live is to die, slowly, day by day. To live dying... But to dream... To dream, that is something else entirely. To dream is to die living.
[/ QUOTE ]
That line made the whole story for me. Can't wait for more.
Thank you kindly 
As with most things I write, that's... Not really how I intended for it to go. It started as a fairly simple (and obvious) idea, but I got carried away, I suppose. Luckily, this story isn't as heavy on exposition, which means it'll be much easier to write. I hope the stylistic (read: basic) approach to descriptions doesn't end up hurting more than it helps, but I'm really trying to avoid using anything but generic terms (say, "light" vs. "lamp").
As long as I can figure out what happens next, all should be well in the world. Let's hope that spending New Year's Eve writing will make for more inspiration next year
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Arcanaville
Samuel_Tow is the only poster that makes me want to punch him in the head more often when I'm agreeing with him than when I'm disagreeing with him.
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Is it real, that wonderful feeling? Or is it just a deep desire, born of loss and longing, born of a cruel reality? And what is it, this wonderful feeling? Is it love, held deep within our hearts, hidden where others could not break it? Or perhaps the satisfaction of defeating the odds and finally making things go our way? Or maybe its happiness, pure and unbridled, because it is a beautiful, kind, perfect world? Or perhaps it is a little bit of each, and something else besides. When darkness comes and survival gives way to dream, what this feeling is no longer seems important. It is there, and that is all that matters. It is there, in the depths of a beautiful dream, a feeling so powerful, so indescribable, so magical and alluring, that it seems to make life worth living.
And yet, it is always just out of reach. Always so close, and always not quite close enough. Whenever we feel like weve grasped that feeling, whenever we are ready to bask in its radiance... The morning brings an end. An end to the dream, an end to the feeling. We wake up, and we survive another day, hoping, wanting, waiting for our next chance chase that feeling, our next chance to chase the dream. But that is all it ever is a dream, an illusion, the notion of a pretty feeling that we will never feel. And in the light of day, we struggle not to think, for to realise the truth of this would... Simply bring too much pain.
But what if morning never came? What if darkness ruled eternal, if the dream of the night could never end? What if we could trade one life, for one chance to grasp that feeling?
He had already made his choice. It was not the world in the light of day he wanted. That is what he left behind to come here. No, what he wanted was something else entirely, something that could only be found in the very heart of darkness. And so he waited, alone in the dark, alone in the cold, alone in the void. The darkness spared hit. It protected him, it provided for him, it took care of him. This was not the fanged jaw of a rabid beast, not in the slightest. No, this was the warm embrace of a gentle giant, the soft kiss of a pretty face. The fiendish horrors from beyond the darkness embraced him like a child in its mothers arms. And in some small way, it eased his aching heart.
The presence of his host was absent for what seemed like forever, but eventually the soft, soothing voice returned.
Voice: Hey, youre still here!
He: Well, my word is still worth something, after all!
Neither of them wanted to admit the new-found bond they shared, together in this loneliness. Neither wanted to say it, so they hid behind bad jokes and childish play. But at the same time, neither one could deny the truth.
Voice: Maybe. Or maybe you just like free food!
He: Cant I like your company AND your food?
Voice: Hypocrite!
He: Coming from you, Ill take that as a compliment.
Voice: Oh, now that was just low!
He: Isnt my charming wit why you like me so much?
Voice: I dont like you!
He: Yes you do.
Voice: OK, maybe I little. I tolerate you, hows that?
He: Im honoured!
Voice: That smart mouth of yours is going to get you killed one of these days.
He: Well, Im not dead yet.
Voice: Not yet. Youre in the belly of the beast. Why are you so sure that wont change?
He: Well, youre not a beast.
Voice: Dont say that!
The tone of the voice changed dramatically. It grew tense and uncertain.
He: Wait, why?
Voice: Please, you... You cant say things like this.
He: Why not? Why is that a problem?
Voice: Please just... Stop... You dont understand what its like...
He: Youre right, I dont. So tell me!
Voice: I cant afford to like you!
As the shout drifted off into the darkness of the void, silence filled the air in its place. And in the silence, a moment passed where neither one knew what to say.
Voice: I... I just cant afford to. Im sorry.
He: But why?
Voice: Its just... This is not who I am... Not what I am. You... You cant be my friend... You cant be... Youre food, I cant... I cant afford to like you. I cant. I... I shouldnt...
He: Heh. Im afraid it is you who does not understand. I came to you knowingly and willingly. I understand what it is that you will do to me, and I accept it.
Voice: You idiot! You may be able to just throw your life away but I... I... I can take it. Not now. Not anymore.
He: Im sorry...
Voice: Dont be. Its not your fault. None of this is. Its been my fault all along. Im the idiot here... Its always been me.
He: Dont say that.
Voice: But its true! Im a monster, a creature of darkness. I exist to seduce others and consume them, to kill, feed and live. And yet... And yet I feel... I dont even know what to call it... Compassion? Guilt? Affection? Im a predator, and I feel bad about having to kill to survive... Pretty dumb, huh?
The voice feigned a little laugh, but the gasping of tears could be heard behind it.
He: *sigh* When I first came here, I came to die, there are no two ways about it. But I stayed... I dont even remember why I stayed anymore. I dont even remember how long its been since I got here. But there is one thing I DO know without a shadow of a doubt. I have never regretted staying with you!
Voice: Please dont...
He: I stayed with you because I chose to. I stayed because it felt like the right thing to do. I stayed with you because I am convinced youre not a monster.
Voice: Then youre as much a fool as I thought you were. You dont know me! You dont know what I am. You dont even know what I look like!
He: I dont CARE what you look like!
Voice: But...
He: I dont care what you look like. I dont care what you are. I dont care what you do. I know WHO you are, and in my eyes, thats the only thing that matters.
Voice: I wish I could believe that. I really wish I could... But this is an illusion. Trust me, I know. Illusions is what I do to survive, and I can tell you just how hollow and empty they are. Pretty dreams that shatter with cold brutality with the morning light.
He: So what?
Voice: What do you mean so what? Theyre not real?
He: Have you had this feeling that... That there is hope for a better tomorrow? That when you wake up the next morning, the world will be a better place. That if you just wish for it hard enough, anything can happen?
Voice: No...
He: Youre lying.
Voice: Yes... Maybe... Im not sure... But even if Ive felt that, I know its not real.
He: Why cant it be?
Voice: What are you saying? It cant be real because its not real!
He: You say it is a pretty dream that ends with the light of day, when real life begins. And what if I said that the light of day is the real dream, a nightmare from which you cannot wake up? What if I said that its the darkness that brings real life with it, that brings a world worth living in?
Voice: Then Id call you a fool.
He: And I would agree with you. But if it makes me a fool to believe in happiness, to believe a better tomorrow... Then a fool I will gladly be.
Voice: I wish I could believe that, I really do, but I... I just cant. Its not real.
He: Do you know why I choose to come here to die?
Voice: No, you said you didnt have an answer.
He: I lost someone close to me. Very, very close...
Voice: Im sorry...
He: So am I... But it was all my fault. I had to make a choice save myself, or save my loved one. I wanted to... I cant even say it... I tried, I tried so hard, but... I chose life. I chose myself. Choosing life doesnt take courage. It is choosing death that takes the greatest strength. I chose life. I was a coward. And in choosing so, I lost... Everything...
Voice: My god...
He: That is why I came here. Why I came to you. I dont deserve to live, but I am too much of a coward to take my own life. So I looked for a monster even greater than myself, a monster that would take my life for me. But I was wrong...
Voice: Please dont do this...
He: You are not a monster. You have done nothing wrong. You have fought to survive the only way you knew how.
Voice: You shouldnt...
He: No, Im the real monster. I betrayed the full, unquestioning trust of another. I sacrificed anothers life to save my own worthless hide. When I came here, I wanted to die... Until I met you. You are the kindest, most gentle, most caring person Ive ever met...
Voice: Thats not true!
He: Its true and you know it. You cant keep denying who you are. You are not alone in this world. You dont have to keep living in this... This hell.
Voice: I have no choice!
He: Yes, you do. And maybe its a dream. Maybe its a fantasy. Maybe its an illusion that will never come true. But you cant know that until you try!
Voice: Ive tried...
He: Then try again! And again and again! Anything worth dreaming about is worth fighting for. Maybe you can never achieve it no matter how long you struggle. Maybe. But if you never try, then nothing good will ever happen.
Voice: I dont know. I... I need to think. I need to be alone. I...
He: Im sorry, I got carried away and...
Voice: No! No, you... You were right. Maybe... I just... I dont know what to think anymore. Im sorry, I need to be alone. I need... I need to think.
He: Think, then. I will be here, waiting to hear your conclusion.
Voice: Thank you.
And in an instance, silence returned to the darkness, and the presence of another sunk into the depths of the abyss once more. The encounter left a mixture of uncertain feelings behind it, both confusing and fascinating. The confidence and playfulness of the mysterious creatures voice seemed to hide a gentle, fragile personality, one consumed with sadness and hopelessness, one haunted by visions of what could not be. And he, a stranger with a strange past, a stranger with a death wish, a stranger with a voice so confident, drew strength not from the righteousness of his cause, but from the surrender of one who had nothing left for the world to take. And yet, in the darkness, these two strange creatures came together in a strange relationship, both victims of a cruel fate, more close together than they could have ever imagined.
In the darkness of the night, all seems possible, all seems real. It is up to us to choose what we accept and what we reject. Do we accept the world as it is, and condemn the dream as cruel torture, a vision of what cannot and should not have, as our minds taunting us with every wound that we suffer? Or do we accept the dream, embrace it, believe it, and fight the waking day as the obstacle that it is, as the problem that must be solved to make our dream come true? In the end, it all depends on how strongly we desire, and how much we care. It all depends on what is really real when the day is done dusks sweet embrace lulls us back into a better place.
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Arcanaville
Samuel_Tow is the only poster that makes me want to punch him in the head more often when I'm agreeing with him than when I'm disagreeing with him.
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Great story Sam! I like it.
"To live is to die slowly...." How about: Live your life, trying to keep the warmth of your dreams and you'll live lively?
Dreams bring desire. The desire to do. The desire to be. The desire to feel. But when the waking world refuses to deliver, when the dream is always but a dream, then this desire brings nothing but pain and suffering. In our minds, a question hangs. How long? How long until we can defeat this monster, defeat this oppressive reality? How long until we have what we want? Or so we keep telling ourselves. But is that what we ask, this hopeful question? Or is it something ever so slightly different? How long? How long can we keep believing in fantasies? How long can we keep hanging on the broken hope and silly dreams? How long can we keep deluding ourselves with a better tomorrow? How long can we keep fighting off the day, waiting for nights sweet embrace with hunger in our hearts? How long can we see that fragile, gentle happy place destroyed, time after time, day after day, again and again and again? How long... Before we surrender to the walking death that is real life?
How long did he wait in the blackness of the void, alone with his thoughts and alone with his dreams? He could no longer remember. In the darkness, time stood still, silent and unmoving. There was no sense of motion, no sense of change... No sense of danger, deep within the monsters den, for this was a gentle monster, one which cared and protected. And in the darkness, he felt protected. In the darkness, he felt safe. Like a soft, fluffy pillow, the darkness supported him when he slept, lulling him into ever more lucid, wondrous dreams. Strange dreams, so delightful and enticing, dreams of what cannot, should not be, and yet what... Really should. Or were those dreams at all? In the darkness, one never really knew for sure. But in his head, a new question banged about. No longer was he preoccupied with the grating pressure of tenacious resistance against accepting the truth. No, this was something different. Something else entirely. Why not?
The presence of his host was gone, retreated into the depths of its domain, away from the prying eyes of its guest. It deserved it privacy, after all. But even hidden so deep, even so far away into the darkness, he could still feel it, now more than ever before. Why? He could not know and, truth be told, he no longer even cared. This mysterious creature which shared his home with him now felt closer than ever before. Familiar, interesting and... Alluring in a very real, palpable way. In their own peculiar way, these two odd creatures had formed that neither of them fully understood.
But time did not stand still forever. Eventually, the darkness stirred and a gentle, soothing breeze brought a familiar sensation closer and closer. This gentle softness could mean one thing, and one thing only his host was back.
He: Welcome back. Are you done thinking?
He seized the initiative, no longer content to be a mere observer.
Voice: No...
A surprisingly... Distant voice sighed.
He: No?
Voice: I dont know what to think anymore, I just...
He: Hey, hey, hey! Dont be like this!
Voice: Be like what?
He: All dark and gloomy and depressed and...
Voice: Do you think I WANT to feel this way?
He: Honestly... Yes. Yes, I do.
Voice: What?
He: Youre always looking for the negative side of things and for the things that disappoint you. Its like you dont feel right unless the world hates you and everything is grim and hopeless.
Voice: Well, if you would get your head out of the clouds, you would see that Im right, however much you may not want to admit it.
He: So?
Voice: So?!? What do you mean so?!? I hate it when you do this!
He: Think about it, though. Yes, maybe the world is a horrible, terrible place. Yes, maybe the hope that you can find a better place, that you can make a better place... Maybe thats empty, too. Ill admit, it probably is, but so what?
Voice: I give up...
He: So your life sucks. I get it. Do you think theres anyone whose life doesnt? The question, though, is what are you going to do about it? Are you going to spend what remains of it crying about how horrible it is, or are you going to do something to try and change it?
Voice: Theres nothing to be done about it!
He: Which brings us back to so? Everybody dies, sooner or later. All creatures, great and small, even the immortal gods eventually meet their fate, as you should well know. Were not going to live forever, you and I, so why not make the best use that we can of the time we have left? Maybe it will come to nothing. Who knows? But even if life ends as miserable as it is, at least it will feel better if we try.
Voice: And how does that fit into your coming here to die?
He: Why? Are you looking for someone to tear you apart and eat you?
Voice: Im not going to tear you apart!
He: A-ha-ha-ha-ha!
A loud, belly voice rang like a bell in the stiff darkness.
He: Ha-ha-ha! I love it when you get embarrassed like that!
Voice: Im not embarrassed!
He: Ha-ha-ha! No? Show me your face. Ill bet youre blushing!
Voice: Dont be stupid! Its just... Thats not how I do things, thats all. Thats all!
He: He-he-he! Sure, of course. Whatever you say.
Voice: Its true! And stop laughing! Its not funny!
He: Oh-ho-ho! Oh, no? Then why am I laughing so hard?
Voice: Because youre an idiot?
He: Well... Besides that...
Voice: Dear gods... Of all who could have walked into my lair, why him?
He: Maybe I was the only one too charming and funny to eat?
For a moment, deathly silence gripped the darkness, and an eerie stillness pervaded the air.
He: Wait, that didnt go over too well. I was just joking. Im sorry if I...
Voice: No... No, you were right. Many have come into my lair... So, so many... And of all of them, you are the only one I could not bring myself to harm... Not ever. I just couldnt do it. I... I wanted to hate you so much... I wanted to pretend you were bad, but... But... Youre not bad... Youre a good person.
He: Youre not half-bad, yourself.
Voice: Oh, dont joke about it. Im the worlds most pathetic monster. You were supposed to be my pray, I was supposed to seduce and consume you, and instead... Instead Ive whining and complaining to you, and going on and on and on about how much I hate my life. Its just... Pathetic...
He: Thats not true, and Im going to keep saying this until it sinks in. You are not pathetic. In fact, theres something I have to say. Ive been meaning to say it for some time. You are the kindest, gentlest, most caring person I have ever met, bar none.
Voice: Youre just saying that to make me feel better.
He: Well, partly... But that doesnt mean its not true. I have honestly never met anyone who has been this nice to me... Or ever put up with me for so long, come to think of it.
Voice: With your charming wit and lovable personality, how could that have ever been true! I would have thought others would flock to you all the time!
He: Sarcasm. Thats good! Does that mean youre feeling better?
Voice: A little. Why are you trying so hard to make me feel better? Its something I wanted to ask you for a while.
He: Heh... I dont know, actually. It just... Bothers me to see you feeling down.
Voice: Really?
He: Well, yes... Youre doing so much for me. Keeping me alive is a big thing in my book! I guess trying to lift your mood as best I can is the least I can do to repay you. Well, its the only thing I can do, really, given the situation.
Voice: You are one of a kind, you are.
He: I am?
Voice: All those who came here... All they ever cared about was themselves. Their pleasure, their booty, their fortune. But you... You are the first who has ever cared about me.
He: What can I say? Im a caring kind of person.
Voice: Thank you. Thank you so much.
He: So, does that mean you like me?
Voice: Maybe.
He: Wait. Maybe is good. Maybe is great!
Voice: And maybe... It is better left unsaid.
He: So, can we agree that life doesnt have to be as dark and gloomy as it appears?
Voice: No.
He: No?
Voice: But we CAN agree that, maybe, even if it is, then so what?
An odd, warm feeling slowly wafted from the cold of the darkness. Even though he could not see into the blackness of the void, he could feel, deep down in his heart, that his companion was smiling at him from across the darkness.
He: Well, thats a start.
Voice: It is ironic, though.
He: What is?
Voice: I am the dreamweaver. I am the one who creates dreams and fantasies for others, who brings their inner-most desires to the surface. Its what I do, and I know how that turns out. It never lasts. They always wake up in the end, always reject the fantasy, refuse to believe it... And yet here you are, a common creature, giving me a fantasy that I can almost believe in. It feels that... That if I just... Allow myself to believe, then maybe... Maybe it can come true.
He: And what fantasy is that?
Voice: Naughty, naughty! You know how these things work. If I told you, it wouldnt come true.
He: Maybe you can just give me a little hint?
Voice: Tell you what if youre still alive when it happens, you will know.
He: Thats good enough, I suppose.
Voice: But I should leave you now. Im tired, and Im sure youd like to rest, as well.
He: Tired? I didnt know you got tired. Do you sleep?
Voice: Dont ask stupid questions.
He: Will I ever get to see you?
Voice: Maybe... Rest now, and eat. We will talk more later.
And with that, the darkness fell silent once more, but the cold of the great hall no longer felt as chilling. A strange kind of warmth coloured the air and filled every crevice of space, almost as if a creature which had thus far been cold and distant was now so much closer. Close enough to touch. Close enough to feel. Closer, in fact, than anyone he had ever felt before. Was it true? Or was he merely getting used to the conditions? In truth, it may have been a little bit of both. For in the darkness, a strange, unspoken dream, was slowly, unnoticeably... Turning quite so very real. But dreams dont come true... Do they?
Can a dream that feels so real we can almost touch it truly become real if we just wish for it hard enough? Can a dream which makes the heart sing really come true, if we just allow ourselves to believe? Maybe. And then again, maybe not. But in the darkness of the night, what does any of that really matter? What, when a wonderful dream can seem more real than a horrible truth? But even if it is just a dream, even if it is just a beautiful wish... What if the mornings light brings not an end... But merely a beginning?
Isnt that worth wishing for? Isnt that worth believing in? Isnt that worth living for?
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Originally Posted by Arcanaville
Samuel_Tow is the only poster that makes me want to punch him in the head more often when I'm agreeing with him than when I'm disagreeing with him.
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[ QUOTE ]
I like this!
[/ QUOTE ]
Thank you kindly!
I'm in a bit of a downtime at the moment, but I should get around to finishing this soon. I've not yet lost the drive and inspiration, so I am determined to finish this.
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Arcanaville
Samuel_Tow is the only poster that makes me want to punch him in the head more often when I'm agreeing with him than when I'm disagreeing with him.
|
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I like this!
[/ QUOTE ]
Thank you kindly!
I'm in a bit of a downtime at the moment, but I should get around to finishing this soon. I've not yet lost the drive and inspiration, so I am determined to finish this.
[/ QUOTE ]
a finished fanfiction i enjoy? next thing you know hell will freeze over!
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I like this!
[/ QUOTE ]
Thank you kindly!
I'm in a bit of a downtime at the moment, but I should get around to finishing this soon. I've not yet lost the drive and inspiration, so I am determined to finish this.
[/ QUOTE ]
a finished fanfiction i enjoy? next thing you know hell will freeze over!
[/ QUOTE ]
well....i jinxed it! 
[ QUOTE ]
well....i jinxed it!
[/ QUOTE ]
Jinx it? I think you opened the blinds, let the sun in, and drove the darkness off to the far reaches of reality.
/em waiting (*taps foot, looks at watch)
i forgot my flashlight....
though i take comfort in knowing if i can't enjoy the end, no one shall!
The light shines brightest in the dark, but it also casts the blackest shadow. Yet sometimes, it is this very blackness that we seek. It is the darkness beyond the light for which we yearn. We fear what we see, but dream of that which we cannot. It is not the night that one must fear, for it brings the calm and warmth of the dream that cannot be. No, it is the morning that brings the pain, for it brings a world full of pain and hardship to our eyes, bright and vibrant such that we cannot help but see. And what we see, we cannot change. What we see, we cannot simply wish away. What we see, we cannot escape from. Sometimes Sometimes, it is easier to plunge yourself in darkness, to banish all around you to a realm where it can neither see not hear nor touch you. Sometimes, it is easier escape, and to forget.
As the darkness enveloped him, his light burned stronger, illuminating the path descending ever deeper into the monsters den. A winding, twisting road, rife with hidden obstacles that almost seemed to lurk in the shadows, waiting to trip, slash or impale him. A perilous journey, one not committed to lightly, but he forged on nevertheless. Through the darkness he walked, and for darkness he was headed, his way back to the light growing ever longer, ever harder, but he did not stop. His was determination unbefitting a creature of his kind, but he had his reasons. He had his reasons to seek out the darkness that lurked beneath.
And as his journey led him from his path of peril into a great hall, it seemed that he had arrived. Darkness leaned against his light from every direction as he peered into the black pit before him, as if just waiting to consume him at the first available opportunity. But it was not the darkness he feared. No, it was the darkness he had come for. And now that he had found it, the darkness spoke.
Voice: Welcome, stranger.
A soft, eerie voice gently floated on a cold breeze from the depths of the abyss, and with it, an ancient presence stirred. It was close, palpably so, lurking almost within reach, but just out of sight where the darkness pushed against the light.
He: Show yourself!
Voice: What is it that you desire, stranger?
He: I desire for you to show me your face!
Voice: So you say, and yet you hide behind the light like a shield of protection. Come to me, stranger, come into the shadow, and you will see. I will show you all that you desire to see, and so much more.
He: It is not more that I want, creature! It is you I have come for!
Voice: Me?
He: Does that surprise you?
Voice: Only in that it is an unusual request, but if it is me that you want, then that is what you will have. Here in the darkness, all can be real, all can be yours. You must but wish for it. Step into the shadow and surrender yourself to me, and your dreams will come true.
He: I have no dreams, creature. I did not come here to dream.
Voice: What? How is that even possible?
He: I wish I had an answer for you, but I do not. Know simply that you cannot tempt me.
Voice: Fool!
A rumbling roar accompanied a gust of wind which seemed to come from all directions, converging on him. He had indeed angered a great power lurking in the darkness, a power that was so much more than a simple sweet, alluring voice.
Voice: Do you think your light will last forever? Do you think you can make your way back out of my domain? I wont let you!
He: Thats OK. I didnt come all the way down here to escape.
In a single instance, the winds died down, the floor fell still and a chilling, eerie silence gripped the darkness. It was as if time stood still, just for a moment. Just for a moment, it seemed like the dream was over. Like none of this had ever really happened. But the voice spoke once again.
Voice: I dont understand.
He: I have no intention of running away. I know what you are, and I know what you have planned for me.
Voice: No, this doesnt make any sense!
The once confident, seductive voice which seemed to flow like a sweet melody shook, as if shocked and confused, and with it, the darkness rippled.
Voice: I dont understand. If you know, then why have you come here? What are you looking for?
He: You.
Voice: No
He: It is you I look for. I have spent many years looking for you, asking others, searching for clues and disturbing secrets long forgotten. You have hidden yourself well, I must admit.
Voice: But if you know what I am, then you know what will become of you.
He: I know. Ive heard the tales.
Voice: But Why?
He: I know what is to become of me, and I am not afraid. Now take me!
And in that instance, everything changed. With a simple, quiet click, his light went out, and the darkness rushed forth to consume him like a rabid beast. The palpable, almost physical blackness swirled around him, pressing in and invading. But he did not die as he had expected. The presence in the dark did not do what he expected it to do. Instead, a single sound rang in the still quiet of the darkness. A voice, at the same time familiar and strange. A soft, sweet voice that sounded almost as if it was weeping.
Voice: No No No This is all wrong This isnt how it was supposed to happen This isnt right
He: What happened?
Voice: You idiot!
The shout sounded almost like a thundercloud. And with it, light flashed for only just a moment, like the lightning which strikes the ground. And with that flash, an image was imprinted on his eyes. A face, at the same time blurry and indistinguishable, and yet Somehow strangely beautiful.
Voice: Youre ruining everything! This isnt how its supposed to happen!
He: What are you talking about?
Voice: Ooh! You dont understand anything! You must leave. Now. Ive cleared a path for you back to the surface. Grab your light and just Just go!
He: No!
Voice: What?!?
He: I told you before. I did not come all the way down here to escape.
Voice: What are you talking about? You cant stay here!
He: Oh, no?
Voice: I mean, I wont LET you stay here!
He: Oh, thats fine by me. If you dont want me here, youll just have to kill me.
Voice: Oh, you stupid, stupid, stupid idiot! I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!
The voice shouted and it screamed, but it did not hurt him. The ravenous darkness weighed heavily upon him, but its hunger was held back. He had walked straight into the beasts jaws, but the beast refused to bite down. Ranting and raving and talking more to itself than to anyone else, the voice sunk back into the darkness, frustrated and angry for reasons he could not comprehend. Why had this creature which had been depicted as a ruthless predator chosen not to kill him? It was clearly mad at him, yet it chose to storm off where he could not follow, rather than strike out in anger. It did not seem to make sense.
But now he had to make a choice. The creature had allowed him to leave. He could simply turn his light back on, turn around, and take the same path back up as he had taken coming down. But he did not yet have what he had come for. His prize had been denied. But he could wait.