what do i do ?

Controllers are a bit unique, in that different powersets end up having a different focus. Many of us love controllers because of this wide diversity. The main goal is, kind of obviously, Control. Like Dominators, the goal of the primary is to reduce or stop the foe's opportunity to respond. However, unlike a Dominator, the goal of the secondary is support, not damage. Some secondaries are defensive, while others are offensive, but the secondaries don't usually provide much damage -- exceptions are Storm's Tornado and Lightning Storm, Trick Arrow's Oil Slick. (There seem to always be exceptions.)

Because Controllers have a lower damage potential than other ATs, the Devs added Containment which doubles the damage done directly by a controller when a foe is held, stunned, slept or immobilized. Pets (and pseudopets) do not get the Containment bonus. Even though they don't, pets are a significant source of damage for all but Mind Controllers.

Some controller sets focus on AoE damage (Fire, Plant) or single target damage (Illusion, Grav, Mind) while others are very low damage (Ice, Elec, Earth). You have picked a Low Damage primary with an offensive support secondary. While Kinetics provides great boost to damage, you need some damage to start with that can be boosted . . . which means you probably need to look to teammates more than solo.

In general, Controllers need more Recharge to get their controls up as much as possible. If you can effectively control groups, then they aren't shooting at you and Defense isn't needed. However, many people like building for Defense, so that is a matter of opinion. My view is that Control helps the entire team and builds on your strengths -- Defense helps you and tends to lessen your ability to control and help the team.

Electric Control, unlike many controllers, has its AoE controls that recharge quickly enough that Recharge isn't as vital as on other controllers. It alsways helps, but isn't as vital.

My Electric Controller is Elec/Rad -- the combination of the AoE controls in Elec with Choking Cloud and the Rad debuffs make it an excellent AoE controller . . . but he doesn't do all that much damage.

There isn't a guaranteed formula for the best controllers -- that's what makes Controllers fun. Some builds are obvious . . . Illusion Controllers build for Recharge to get Perma-PA if they can. My Ice/Storm and Fire/Rad have a bunch of high endurance toggles, so they build for EndRdx and Recovery. Plant tends to want high Recharge to get Seeds of Confusion and Creepers up as much as possible. My Mind/FF builds for Defense to build on his other Defense.

I'm not sure what level you are from your post, but I suggest you play for a while without worrying about your final build -- get the hang of what you are doing and the playstyle -- before deciding on a final build.

I know that I have had some difficulty switching over to Dominators . . . I miss my support sets, and keep thinking of a Dom as a Controller who does damage, when I really need to think of a Dom as more of a Blapper-type character who does controls.