Sorry to hear that your thread was wiped... Welcome back, regardless! Anyway, I have two arcs that are listed in my sig but I believe the one I submitted to you was Soldiers of Fortune, a 30-35 villain arc. If you have time, though, I'd definitely appreciate it if you also ran my other one: Blitzkrieg, a level 45-50 hero arc. If you must review one, though, Soldiers is less popular.
I look forward to hearing what you think about them!
My arcs:
Title: Blitzkrieg
Arc ID: 3416
Title: Soldiers of Fortune
Arc ID: 4431
Title: The Rikti Accession
Arc ID: 278757
Arc: A Fish Tale, One That Didn't Get Away
Arc ID: 164202
By: @Mrs.AlphaOne
I'm trying this out with a level 21 MA/Willpower Scrapper to make this a little different. If I run into a serious issue, I'll switch to a high level character and give this a more fair run. Anyway, let's begin!
Mission 1:
Talking to the contact, it's clear you're gonna need to go back through his opening text. Commas are way overused, including them being in places they shouldn't be at all. Also, check his last sentance in the send-off, looks like you forgot what you were saying for a moment there. As for your selling the mission itself, very nice. Quite interested in the story you've set up and feeling ready to jump in.
Remembering that I'm working for a Mender, I got over the fact that my hero was fighting Longbow rather quickly. The map is appropriate, the mission is neat, and everything is going just fine until I get to Gideon. I'm not sure if you're going for a look that's him in the middle of the transformation from human to Mako or not, but you may be better off just using Captain Mako as the hostage. I think you can still rename him to Gideon and I'm almost positive you can rewrite his bio if you like. But as is right now, I'm not a fan of the custom NPC.
More on Gideon: Dual Blades? I guess you must be going for pre-transformation. I was expecting claws, so it surprised me there.
Mission overall: Obvious, but very appropriate map. It was fun, but Gideon was a bit of a let-down.
Mission 2:
I think one of the main things that's getting you with commas is putting one before every conjunction. For example, in your contact's opening text you do exactly that. Don't worry, I suffer from comma over-use as well, it can just be a little distracting for some people, that's all. His dialogue read a little awkward to me this time, not sure how you'd go about fixing that except to go back through it and see if any places where a re-write would be appropriate strike you. Into the mission!
One error here: Find the Meddler and put and clean
Mission's going pretty smooth. I got confused by the appearance of the two prisoners but hey. Now I'm staring at Numina and resisting the urge to cry, as this no doubt will hurt... a lot. Yeah, can't quite take her down with my Scrapper. Suppose I'll switch to Blightlord at this point (Level 50 Necro/Poison/Soul Mastermind) to also ease my worries of killing Longbow and such as a hero. One thing: Is Numina really right for this part? It seems to me as if she would know better than to tamper with the time stream. Yeah, even the Mastermind is hitting a large road block with her... Starting to get a tad frustrated at this point.
Ack. At this point I literally cannot finish your arc due to Numina. Between the two characters I've taken five whacks at her. As stated in the rules of the thread (Which I know is lost :/) I have to call this review to a halt. I've done my best, trying two different types of characters both types (up front and safe firing distance) on either lowest or second to lowest difficulty and have been stopped by this same EB. I'll go ahead and give you the recap off of what I've done so far.
Overall: The arc had a very nice premise, though the way some things were carried out (Gideon, Numina) didn't do it for me. It was perfectly fine/fun until I reached Numina who is always a tough one to fight and she pounded me. Go over your dialogue for your contact again, check those commas, consider using the actual Mako for your Gideon NPC and reconsider if Numina is right for that arc.
Overall, I give it a 3/5, which actually isn't all that heavily impacted by my EB issues. Thanks for your own play of my arc, and I wish you the best!
-BB
(Mekk, you're up next)
Arc ID: 475246, "Bringing a Lord to Power"
"I'm only a simple man trying to cling to my tomorrow. Every day. By any means necessary."
-Caldwell B. Cladwell
It's been a while since I've heard anything from this thread, so I'm just checking to make sure nothing has happened (And to make sure the forum monster doesn't eat it). I'm really looking forward to your review of my arc (Or arcs, depending on whether you run one or both), so I hope to see it fairly soon!
My arcs:
Title: Blitzkrieg
Arc ID: 3416
Title: Soldiers of Fortune
Arc ID: 4431
Title: The Rikti Accession
Arc ID: 278757
[ QUOTE ]
(And to make sure the forum monster doesn't eat it)
[/ QUOTE ]
FYI, this forum doesn't have to worry about the forum monster. This forum, like Player Guides, has been marked "do not purge" for a little while now. 
Huh- welcome back, BB- I was kind of wondering what had happened when you vanished from Devious' RP.
My arcs are in my sig- feel free to pick whichever one you prefer; all could benefit from feedback (although some changes may have to wait for i15, as Small Fears is quite literally five characters from the current limit- as in, I could fit one more short word in, but that's about it 
).
Oh- and if you decide to try either Small Fears or How to Survive a Robot Uprising, both are tuned for high-level play, so running with a twenty-something toon probably... won't work very well. Trollbane is set for 10-14, mind you, so... eh, s'up to you.
"A soft answer turneth away wrath. Once wrath is looking the other way, shoot it in the head." Seven Habits of Highly Effective Pirates
MA Arcs: #12285, "Small Fears", #106553, "Trollbane", #12669, "How to Survive a Robot Uprising"
Ahh, those unplanned breaks always take longer than you would think. Good to see you are back in the game. You'll find my arc listed in my Sig. Haven't done any others yet as I'm waiting on I15.
Nice to see you back, BB. I know from experience how the demands of real life can affect in-game projects, so no apology is really needed.
The Arc I requested you to review is in my signature, "The Galactic Protectorate - 01". I look forward to your review 
Supplemental Galactic Protectorate Fanfic
After an unplanned hiatus (sp?) from the game, I return to repay the arcs I promised to review, only now it seems as if the thread was wiped at some point, leaving me in a rather unfortunate position. I still have a list of usernames here, but I don't have their arcs anymore. The list as I have it is:
1. Geekboy
2. Dark Aspect
3. Mekkanos
4. Shield Shocker
5. Te Cham(eleon?)
6. Mirror Man
7. Mrs.AlphaOne
Those are the ones who I got confirmation as having played one of my arcs. The rest below I have not, but at this point am perfectly willing to review anyway, since I feel rather terrible about my absence without word to anyone.
Dutch
Wall of Knight
Aracade
El Condor
Casual Player
If any of these people want to step forward with an arc (Except Alpha, I have hers and will post a review shortly) I'll be glad to repay them.
Arc ID: 475246, "Bringing a Lord to Power"
"I'm only a simple man trying to cling to my tomorrow. Every day. By any means necessary."
-Caldwell B. Cladwell