Well, my arc got a review in the forum.
The reviewer had some mixed feelings, but I knew it would be an uphill battle because the reviewer prefers shorter arcs.
Here's where dragonslay tells me what he finds wrong with my arc:
dragonslay review
My response is lower in his thread.
Glad to have this actually. I've had lots of great reviews from people who like long stories with lots of text. Hearing from someone with the opposite preference is a good way to get soem critical feedback. And it did highlight a few things for me.
Lots of people giving me lots of rave feedback in tells, some of which is enough to make me blush. So, if you like story focused arcs with lots of text, give it a try! Arc 5909. For those who like to read a lot during their story arcs only. 
Although, I have a few tweaks to make, that will have to wait until after work tonight.
Thanks to everyone who has played, and especially to everyone who has sent feedback tells.
I'm a published amateur comic book author: www.ericjohnsoncomics.com
******MA Arcs****
Arc 5909: "Amazon-Avatars"
Arc 6143: "Escalation" (Nominee: Architect Awards, Nominee: Player Awards, and Dev's Choice!)
Live feedback!
---
First mission! Okay! Going into a warehouse to find an artifact - except my contact never tells me what it looks like or where I can find it. I guess it's in the glowy box, it usually is.
Hi, Mr. Circle Mage inside the door. Hi, Mr. Captive Guy inside the door. Hi, three relevant glowies inside the door. Hi, massive sprawling room behind said mission-completing items with absolutely nothing relevant in it. It would be nice if you mattered.
So the Circle Mage dumps on me what's actually going on as I wear him down. Uh, if it's really important enough to head back to Oranbega maybe you should just beat feet, guy. No? Rather get chopped up? Suit yourself.
The glowy crate formerly contained the artifact (I know this... how?) and was levered open, leaving "distinctive weapon marks". So distinctive I can't actually tell what's distinctive about them! Given that you can pick up a crowbar for like five bucks I wonder why they'd bother leaving suc obvious traces.
I also wonder what the point of the Circle is. The Mage kinda beats into my head that the Circle being there at all is a mistake, a clever ruse by some third party, and the clues at the scene paint a picture of that third party, alright. The contact also impresses on me when I get back about how the CoT actually didn't play an important role, and I'm kinda wondering what the point was of calling them in at all if it's going to provide 15 seconds of smokescreen.
I would at least like to have a description of the crate with the artifact, so it doesn't seem so unreasonable that I conclude it's gone. But this whole scenario is making me think the Circle mind-controlled my contact and planted the evidence against the Knives.
---
...especially since he's sending me to Malta. Knives are a mercenary organization. Generally only Malta has the scratch to hire them regularly, but they'll work for anyone. And occasionally they pursue their own weird agenda.
This isn't to say that it doesn't make sense for Malta to have intel on them. But how does a Warrior find out about a shadowy government conspiracy, let alone a minor intelligence hub of same?
...and the boss just gives up the intel? That's rather uncharacteristic of him. I was expecting a cyanide capsule.
---
It'd be nice if I some of the clues I picked up actually mentioned Croatoa, seeing as how I'm being sent there now.
Ah joy. I get to wait around for caltrop patches to clear before my new allies will be ready to go. Eh, forget it, I'll just ditch 'em anyway.
It is nice to see the Knives actually being mystic for once. A lot of people forget about that aspect of them.
Do you want an ambush interrupting every attempt to smash the tablet? As the arc stands you'll only get that for the first one.
...I'm gonna be fighting JunJun, VesVes, CereCere, and PallaPalla. This may be amusing.
----
Aw. Just #s 2 and 4. But what's this about weirdness with "the Incarnate of Zeus"? Did the Warriors get their hands on an artifact with Incarnate power in the first place? Also I think Zeus is technically like everyone involved's dad or something. But then again this is Greek mythology, there's about even odds that for a given X Zeus is its dad.
It's a temple but it's not an Oranbegan one! My hat is off to you, good sir.
Aphrodite! Reading her description... honey, everyone loves beauty everywhen. That's why it's called beauty. It's just that these days you can get it out of a tin.
It's a pity there's no dolla-variable for the opposite sex, that might make for interesting taunts. At least if I wasn't a plant person from another dimension.
Fortunately I had enough break frees to not get confused in the middle of her horde of ambushes. I would suggest at least giving her some decent resistances so that a team doesn't get a ton of minions dropped on them when she melts, as bosses tend to do before a team.
Almost unique among the melee powersets, Hard Broad Sword has buildup. Just thought I'd put that out there.
I'm wondering if you intended Aphrodite to show up at the back of the mission here, since most of the minions seem to still be under her sway even after her inglorious faceplant into the gravel.
Oh, it's a patrol of Knives of Artemis! Why are they not the rank and file in this mission, with the charmed warriors as "honor guard'?I guess for a little variety.
Hestia has a nice description. Helps explain why she's trying to burn down her latest guest.
...wait, why does Athena have a Jupiter symbol on her shield? That's odd.
---
Come to think of it, all the goddesses are rather tall. I guess for concept, but it's kind of odd to see "Sister Luna" towering over the Knives she was once supposed to be.
Nice use of patrol dialogue and setpiece battles in the last level.
Interesting summons as Artemis is whittled down. It might be nice to have them as patrols in the last mission, possibly?
Anyway, nice close to the arc, fights felt very nice, but there's some work that needs to be done on the setup of the earlier missions.
Up with the overworld! Up with exploration! | Want a review of your arc?
My arcs: Dream Paper (ID: 1874) | Bricked Electronics (ID: 2180) | The Bravuran Jobs (ID: 5073) | Backwards Day (ID: 329000) | Operation Fair Trade (ID: 391172)
[ QUOTE ]
[Tell] @Casual Player: Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: Excellent
MA arc. I look forward to seeing this made into a dev's choice.
[/ QUOTE ]
That made my evening!
(quote posted with permission of @Casual Player)
I'm a published amateur comic book author: www.ericjohnsoncomics.com
******MA Arcs****
Arc 5909: "Amazon-Avatars"
Arc 6143: "Escalation" (Nominee: Architect Awards, Nominee: Player Awards, and Dev's Choice!)
Glazius_F,
thanks for the extensive feedback, and sorry it took me so long to reply. I worked on fixing a lot of things brought up in your feedback, then got caught up in work and RL things for a bit.
[ QUOTE ]
First mission! Okay! Going into a warehouse to find an artifact - except my contact never tells me what it looks like or where I can find it. I guess it's in the glowy box, it usually is.
[/ QUOTE ]
Mission briefing now explains that Alexander has a crate inventory number, but not even a description of the artifact.
[ QUOTE ]
Hi, Mr. Circle Mage inside the door. Hi, Mr. Captive Guy inside the door. Hi, three relevant glowies inside the door. Hi, massive sprawling room behind said mission-completing items with absolutely nothing relevant in it. It would be nice if you mattered.
[/ QUOTE ]
darn the spawning of everything up front sometimes, no matter how I changed the front-middle-back assignments.
I fixed this by adding a *lot* more optional glowies scattered throughout the map, with clues that talk about the Warrior's use of artifacts and this warehouse. should both give more flavor and stop all the mission objectives from being front-loaded.
[ QUOTE ]
The glowy crate formerly contained the artifact (I know this... how?) and was levered open, leaving "distinctive weapon marks". So distinctive I can't actually tell what's distinctive about them! Given that you can pick up a crowbar for like five bucks I wonder why they'd bother leaving suc obvious traces.
[/ QUOTE ]
clarified in clue that an enchanted sword was used to cut through the powerful wards on the chest.
[ QUOTE ]
I also wonder what the point of the Circle is. The Mage kinda beats into my head that the Circle being there at all is a mistake, a clever ruse by some third party, and the clues at the scene paint a picture of that third party, alright. The contact also impresses on me when I get back about how the CoT actually didn't play an important role, and I'm kinda wondering what the point was of calling them in at all if it's going to provide 15 seconds of smokescreen.
[/ QUOTE ]
the idea is the the Knives raid the warehouse for the artifact, then dropped the wards from the inside so the Circle would come and trash the place. The Knives figured the Circle being there would prevent any divinations or mystic tracing methods from pointing at the Knives. Due to Alexander's advance warning, you interrupt the Circle before they are done.
Added some new text to clarify this.
[ QUOTE ]
This isn't to say that it doesn't make sense for Malta to have intel on them. But how does a Warrior find out about a shadowy government conspiracy, let alone a minor intelligence hub of same?
[/ QUOTE ]
added text to clarify this.
Alexander sells some of the artifacts to buy the services of some mystic seers and diviners. Malta has limited anti-magic resources (comparitively).
[ QUOTE ]
...and the boss just gives up the intel? That's rather uncharacteristic of him. I was expecting a cyanide capsule.
[/ QUOTE ]
He's spotted some very scary trends in the Knives activities, so he hopes the hero will do something about it. Plus, if he lives, might be able to tell his superiors.
[ QUOTE ]
It'd be nice if I some of the clues I picked up actually mentioned Croatoa, seeing as how I'm being sent there now.
[/ QUOTE ]
now mentioned in clues.
[ QUOTE ]
Ah joy. I get to wait around for caltrop patches to clear before my new allies will be ready to go. Eh, forget it, I'll just ditch 'em anyway.
[/ QUOTE ]
perfectly valid approach. especially if you don't want to team with Malta.
[ QUOTE ]
It is nice to see the Knives actually being mystic for once. A lot of people forget about that aspect of them.
[/ QUOTE ]
yeah, that's kinda my inspiration for this arc. "What are those mysterious moonlight rituals for? What could they accomplish?" I wanted to write an arc that highlighted the overlooked mystical side of the KOA.
[ QUOTE ]
Do you want an ambush interrupting every attempt to smash the tablet? As the arc stands you'll only get that for the first one.
[/ QUOTE ]
I figured one ambush should use up their squad reserved for that purpose. Plus, I didn't want to go crazy on the ambushes, especially with Knives. Ambushes with other factions, that's for later missions....
[ QUOTE ]
...I'm gonna be fighting JunJun, VesVes, CereCere, and PallaPalla. This may be amusing.
[/ QUOTE ]
Hope it was.
[ QUOTE ]
Aw. Just #s 2 and 4. But what's this about weirdness with "the Incarnate of Zeus"? Did the Warriors get their hands on an artifact with Incarnate power in the first place? Also I think Zeus is technically like everyone involved's dad or something. But then again this is Greek mythology, there's about even odds that for a given X Zeus is its dad.
[/ QUOTE ]
text clarified now. Alexander is afraid getting Statesmen close to the Avatars will cause them to gain power faster.
[ QUOTE ]
It's a temple but it's not an Oranbegan one! My hat is off to you, good sir.
[/ QUOTE ]
Yeah, I wanted to avoid Oranbega like the plague.
I think this was a more appropriate map choice.
[ QUOTE ]
I'm wondering if you intended Aphrodite to show up at the back of the mission here, since most of the minions seem to still be under her sway even after her inglorious faceplant into the gravel.
[/ QUOTE ]
Added text saying that the warriors are enticed by Aphrodite, then trained by Athena. They'll hang out even if Aphrodite is down, in hopes of helping restore her.
[ QUOTE ]
Oh, it's a patrol of Knives of Artemis! Why are they not the rank and file in this mission, with the charmed warriors as "honor guard'?I guess for a little variety.
[/ QUOTE ]
1) variety, as you said
2) most of the Knives are busy elsewhere. small hint to Misison 5.
3) best chance to use the custom faction.
[ QUOTE ]
...wait, why does Athena have a Jupiter symbol on her shield? That's odd.
[/ QUOTE ]
Traditionally, Athena bore the Aegis, her father's shield, into battle.
[ QUOTE ]
Come to think of it, all the goddesses are rather tall. I guess for concept, but it's kind of odd to see "Sister Luna" towering over the Knives she was once supposed to be.
[/ QUOTE ]
Sadly, I can't do cut scenes. It'd be neat if I could do one of Sister Luna, 5'8" Hand of Artemis boss turn into 8 foot tall Avatar of Artemis EB as part of her empowerment... ah, well.
[ QUOTE ]
Nice use of patrol dialogue and setpiece battles in the last level.
[/ QUOTE ]
Thanks. If player wants they can try to go straight to Artemis, but lots of fluff flavor text to read for those who like it.
[ QUOTE ]
Interesting summons as Artemis is whittled down. It might be nice to have them as patrols in the last mission, possibly?
[/ QUOTE ]
Good suggestion. I've added this.
[ QUOTE ]
Anyway, nice close to the arc, fights felt very nice, but there's some work that needs to be done on the setup of the earlier missions.
[/ QUOTE ]
Been working away at it. Hope it's better now.
Thanks for the detailed review, and again, sorry it took so long to respond.
I'm a published amateur comic book author: www.ericjohnsoncomics.com
******MA Arcs****
Arc 5909: "Amazon-Avatars"
Arc 6143: "Escalation" (Nominee: Architect Awards, Nominee: Player Awards, and Dev's Choice!)
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[Tell] @Casual Player: Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: Excellent
MA arc. I look forward to seeing this made into a dev's choice.
[/ QUOTE ]
That made my evening!
(quote posted with permission of @Casual Player)
[/ QUOTE ]
Indeed it was, and I stand by the statement. 
This arc is great story about both the Warriors and the Knives, two criminally underutilized villain groups in the game.
As far as I'm concerned, this kind of mission is exactly what the AE was made for.
Statesmonkey Sez: Lighten up! It's a game, for Lincoln's sake!
Also: Six years of casual play begins to look an awful lot like one year of hardcore play.
Changes made 5/31/09
*altered mission intro and accept text on Mission 4. Done to fix a possible plot hole if the playing character is of divine origin or connected to a god/goddess. Also helps clarify and expand the role of the artifact in the plot.
I'm a published amateur comic book author: www.ericjohnsoncomics.com
******MA Arcs****
Arc 5909: "Amazon-Avatars"
Arc 6143: "Escalation" (Nominee: Architect Awards, Nominee: Player Awards, and Dev's Choice!)
@GlaziusF
Playing on a low 40s DB/Fire brute. Mission Engineer is getting closer by the second.
Played this once, very early on, and kinda remember it, but it's apparently changed so here I is again.
---
So Mr. Alex has an artifact of danger. Honey, aren't they all.
His pitch seems a little stilted though. Maybe just "Whatever will motivate you to retrieve that artifact, I offer to you. Once it is free we can discuss terms."
Hmm. Place seems empty. Oh, but there's a boss on a catwalk right up front.
Heheheh. "With some success". Sure thing, magical weapon description. Keep pretending the Warriors aren't getting owned five ways from Sunday on the streets of Talos.
I'm not sure "Forensics" is usable as a category noun when talking about types of evidence.
Little clue typo: it should be "Protective Amulets" -- but there's really no need to have separate clues for all the filler, especially since they're so long. Just dumping a little cursory description into the chat should work.
Everything isn't front-loaded this time so that's a bonus.
Hmm. Maybe Alex should call Malta "their CUSTOMARY employers". Other people do hire the Knives.
---
Eh heh heh. Is there anyone who has a problem with beating up on Malta?
But this clue: "These files seem to indicate that Malta isn't behind the theft of the artifact. You'll need both these files and the papers on the Supervisor to confirm this isn't just a Malta trick." I... really don't understand what you're trying to say there. How does a computer file tell me anything about what information I need from someone else?
What are they? Retrieval orders? Malta warehouse manifests? And why do I need corroborating evidence?
It still seems rather odd for Malta to be willingly sharing any information with invaders. I wonder, does it work if the guy in charge thinks you're an outside agent hired by the Knives and gives you the information to get you to go away?
---
Aw geez, Perez Park In Yellow. Fortunately there's no backtracking involved here.
Does that swordguard pose make enemies invalid targets? I think I had some problem targeting the Knives around the artifact.
...and the mission doesn't complete when all the tablets are destroyed and the artifact retrieved. I still have to save the Malta.
That doesn't seem right. It also means I have to wait around for the caltrops to disperse for the mission to complete.
---
Little typo in Alex's intro, "solider" for "soldier". Maybe he could give a quick summary of the relevant pantheons or somesuch.
...ow, ambushes and honor guards composed entirely of custom lieutenants are pretty unreasonable, given that up until now things have been pretty stock.
Actually, the custom lieutenants are pretty unreasonable all on their own. Stacking -def combined with heavy broadsword damage and what I think is Against All Odds going off is collectively kicking my [censored]. I just can't keep up enough inspirations to handle them all.
Kind of weird to have Aphrodite reference the Iliad right after Alex talks about not trusting ancient myths.
Getting up to the double digits now for the count of the number of times a group of three lieutenants has kicked my [censored].
Or sometimes two lieutenants. They just. Don't. MISS. And their entire attack chain is enough to kill me.
Weirdly enough the actual bosses don't present as much threat. Fire is like mothers' milk, with a break free mind control isn't a problem, and the axe doesn't fire off nearly often enough to worry about.
---
And now, the ultimate showdown of ultimate destiny.
Hmm. All the Warrior, Centurion, and Wolf patrols seem to say the same things. Maybe just throw in one speaking and the rest silent?
Huh. There's a battle between Knives and what they call "outsiders"... but they're other Knives? What?
Ah, okay. Didn't get to see all of it with all the text popping up. Battles can still start without heroes present, and referring to them as if they were is still wrong.
Yeah, the warrior lieuts are way overpowered. I jump into a patrol of four centurions and handle it no problem, then two warrior lieutenants school me.
I am having no luck finding this boss, and it takes seemingly forever to be able to move and jump again after I finish every battle with a group I land in.
And FINALLY I find her. I think she was an overspawn, she shows up in an area I already have a minimap revealed for. Maybe her attendant Knives should be doing a casting animation or something.
A little grape flavor, a little orange flavor, and I can rage her down no problem.
---
Storyline - ****. About the only thing I don't buy here is Malta trying to cooperate with somebody who's in their base killing their mans. I think you can still get the information even if they still perceive you as hostile.
Design - ****. Great visual work on the customs. Reasonable map choices for pretty much everything, but I still wonder about having to free those Malta operatives to complete the third mission. It's not like they're being sacrificed or anything.
Gameplay - *. I think it must be the new power levels taking effect, because those warrior lieutenants are absolutely freakin' brutal. Really, toning them down to minions would make perfect thematic sense, maybe mix them up with the lady Centurions to be the baseline enemies for mission 4 if you don't have room for another custom enemy. Also the last map effectively becomes a "defeat all Knives of Artemis on outdoor map" mission since the Artemis spawn has no distinguishing marks aside from her model, which really doesn't stand out until you get close enough anyway.
Detail - *****. Pretty thorough detailing of everything involved with the various missions, including custom descriptions for bosses and allies who already have stock entries.
Overall - ****. I'm rounding this up because most of my major beefs with how things are going seem more like oversights and casualties of a patch, and won't be too bothersome to correct.
Up with the overworld! Up with exploration! | Want a review of your arc?
My arcs: Dream Paper (ID: 1874) | Bricked Electronics (ID: 2180) | The Bravuran Jobs (ID: 5073) | Backwards Day (ID: 329000) | Operation Fair Trade (ID: 391172)
GlaziusF,
thanks for the review.
something got borked in the arc. The Amazon-Avatars Minions group is *not* supposed to all LTs.
and Avatar of Artemis and her spawn *are* supposed to have a pretty visible animation to make them easier to find on the map.
These issues must've popped up since my last playtest somehow.
My sincere apologies. Sorry this resulted in far worse gameplay for you than I intended.
I'm a published amateur comic book author: www.ericjohnsoncomics.com
******MA Arcs****
Arc 5909: "Amazon-Avatars"
Arc 6143: "Escalation" (Nominee: Architect Awards, Nominee: Player Awards, and Dev's Choice!)
Glazius,
Thanks much for the review.
However, it looks like something got totally borked since my last playtest! the Amazon Avatar's Minions are *not* supposed to be an all LT faction! Arggh!
And the LTs had just gotten a lot nastier due to the recent difficulty shifts in critter powers.
Fixed that. And even changed the LTs to Dual blades to avoid too much Shield stacking with minions while I was at it.
Sorry the whole thing was crazy on the Gameplay side. That was NOT what I was intending.
And you've convinced me. Freeing the Malta allies in Mission 3 is now totally optional. If nothing else, waiting for the caltrops to de-spawn is a major pain.
Testing it now to see if the spawn animation around Artemis is final mission makes her stand out again. Must've lost animations in a patch somewhere.
Thanks for finding this glaring problem! Not sure where it came in.... Maybe I edited a typo on another computer and uploaded a bad, old version of the faction file....
I'm a published amateur comic book author: www.ericjohnsoncomics.com
******MA Arcs****
Arc 5909: "Amazon-Avatars"
Arc 6143: "Escalation" (Nominee: Architect Awards, Nominee: Player Awards, and Dev's Choice!)
Changes made 6/2/09
-fixed some typos spotted by GlaziusF (thanks!)
-changed goals in Mission 3. Rescuing Malta allies is now totally optional for those who wish to let those Malta bastards suffer at the hands of the Knives. (And serves them right!)
-fixed the custom group "Amazon Avatars Minions". Apparently, the minion and boss critters had disappeared somehow, leaving only the LTs. yikes!
-changed "Enscorcelled Warrior" LT critters from Broadsword / Shield to Dual Blades / WP, to make them more distinct from Minions in same faction. Should also reduce impact of either shield powers stacking, or over-stacking of DEF DeBuffs from Broadsword.
-fixed animations for the spawn around final boss in final mission, to make easier to find on outdoor map.
I'm a published amateur comic book author: www.ericjohnsoncomics.com
******MA Arcs****
Arc 5909: "Amazon-Avatars"
Arc 6143: "Escalation" (Nominee: Architect Awards, Nominee: Player Awards, and Dev's Choice!)
PoliceWoman did a Review of Amazon-Avatars!
Pull Quote: "I like the mythological premise, and I think this is exactly the sort of plot the Knives of Artemis would love to enact. The dialog is very good and I particularly like how each of the goddess-avatars has their own personality and opinion of the situation. I thought the hook for why you're doing the first two missions was a little weak and could be improved, but the last three missions were all quite good."
Rating: 5 Stars!
Link to review (spoilers galore, of course)
PoliceWoman's Review of Amazon-Avatars
Thanks much to PW for reviewing the arc! (and for taking a teammate along for an extra play and rating! )
And now, my responses are here:
Detailed reponse to PoliceWoman's Review of Amazon-Avatars
and
Quick point of something to fix
I'm a published amateur comic book author: www.ericjohnsoncomics.com
******MA Arcs****
Arc 5909: "Amazon-Avatars"
Arc 6143: "Escalation" (Nominee: Architect Awards, Nominee: Player Awards, and Dev's Choice!)
Changes made 6/5/09
-fixed several typos and punctuation errors (thanks Police Woman!)
-added text to Mission 2 briefing, trying to clarify transition from Mission 1
-changed clue in Mission 2, clarifying why the data on the Knives of Artemis is in this base
-slight change to Athena dialogue in Mission 4, to mention her shield symbol.
-added patrol in mission 4, talking about the warrior minions and *their* shields.
-small text changes here and there in all missions
I'm a published amateur comic book author: www.ericjohnsoncomics.com
******MA Arcs****
Arc 5909: "Amazon-Avatars"
Arc 6143: "Escalation" (Nominee: Architect Awards, Nominee: Player Awards, and Dev's Choice!)
"Amazon-Avatars" got a nice mention in PoliceWoman's War Journal as well.
Police Woman's War Journal - mention of "Amazon Avatars" in last paragraph
relevant quote:
[ QUOTE ]
A stalker friend joined me and we duoed through Amazon-Avatars, which was about a Knives of Artemis plot to make some of their number get possessed by the souls (and powers) of classical Greek goddesses. This seems exactly the sort of thing the KoA would be into, I thought. The story started a little slow but I like the mythological premise, the dialog was really good and I liked how each of the goddess-avatars had her own personality. I gave it 5 stars.
[/ QUOTE ]
I'm a published amateur comic book author: www.ericjohnsoncomics.com
******MA Arcs****
Arc 5909: "Amazon-Avatars"
Arc 6143: "Escalation" (Nominee: Architect Awards, Nominee: Player Awards, and Dev's Choice!)
Amazon-Avatars won 5th place in Projectionist's arc contest!
and considering that the arcs in 1st through 4th places are all ones I admire quite a bit as good ones, I'm quite happy with that showing.
Winner's List for Projectionist's Contest
I'm a published amateur comic book author: www.ericjohnsoncomics.com
******MA Arcs****
Arc 5909: "Amazon-Avatars"
Arc 6143: "Escalation" (Nominee: Architect Awards, Nominee: Player Awards, and Dev's Choice!)
Hopefully, the image will be posted directly here soon, but for anyone wanting a preview of the flier for Amazon-Avatars, I'll link to the DeviantArt page of the artist, Rob Banbury.
He did a great job on the flier for Escalation, and I think he did a great job on this one too!
Amazon-Avatars flier on DeviantArt
Hope people like the pic!
I'm a published amateur comic book author: www.ericjohnsoncomics.com
******MA Arcs****
Arc 5909: "Amazon-Avatars"
Arc 6143: "Escalation" (Nominee: Architect Awards, Nominee: Player Awards, and Dev's Choice!)
The below flier is posted on behalf of the player organization promoting the event.
For more information about having an event flier posted, please see the [/color]<a href='http://boards.cityofheroes.com/showflat.php?Cat=0&Number=8952225"'>[u][color=#810081 size=1]Event Posting Rules[/color]
<img src=http://i228.photobucket.com/albums/ee92/Shag49931/AmazonAvatars5909.jpg>
Here's a sampling of feedback recieved on Amazon-Avatars so far:
(note some adjustments and fixes made since these feedbacks recieved)
[Tell] 2009-04-22 20: 16:04 Message From @Devcon : Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: WOW. Not only did you make a Malta/Knives arc that makes sense, you also made it ENJOYABLE. This is what MA should be about!!! Aside from one typo in the 4th mission, this was FLAWLESS!
[Tell] @Fiery Mistress: Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: Wonderful mission, story and writing; only issues was a minor spelling issue in the Hestia Avatar's conversation, and in the last mission briefing, the statement "Malta has even less reason to see her succeed than us" is a bit ackward; maybe replace reason with desire? Also the Avatar of Artemis was a bit weak as an EB. I had more difficulty with the three bosses in the prior mission than with her as a level 50 stone melee / electricity aura brute (running on +4 difficulty).
[Tell] 2009-05-22 17: 41:43 Message From @Sister Jeanne : Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: Superbly done. excellent atmosphere, clues and very good plotline. I especially enjoyed the Athena and Aphrodite dialogue, as wella s the thematics in the final mission. 5/5 stars
[Tell] 2009-05-25 04: 41:59 Message From @ICSpark : Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: Thank you for your arc. I enjoyed it a lot. The writing was very good and the custom enemies were well done. I look forwarded to playing more of your arcs. Good hunting!
[Tell] @Casual Player: Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: Excellent MA arc. I look forward to seeing this made into a dev's choice.
[Tell] @Lazorman: Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: Great story arc, I loved the use of mythology!
[Tell] @Tahlana: Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: Great arc Well written and designed! I enjoyed it and the boss fights were alot of fun!
[Tell] 2009-05-31 10: 47:16 Message From @Matres : Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: Great Arc. 5 Stars! one possible plot hole though, you say that you don't want the Freedom Phalanx helping because Statesmans
being an avatar might make the other avatars stronger, but what happens if the players character is an avatar or has some other strong connection to a god/goddess?
[Tell] 2009-06-01 07: 04:51 Message From @Riley Delacroix : Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: I felt a little disappointed, the difficulty was actually very low. 
Liked the story though. Played it at diff. 4 on an ill/rad, ate the mobs for lunch.
[Tell] 2009-06-15 11: 20:58 Message From @Archdevil : Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: M2: Malta guy talked a bit too easily. M3: Artifact clue should be "depicts", the Malta dialogue was too friendly, IMO. M4 send off, should be "you will be led," "Brethren warriors" maybe should be "warrior brethren?" They're siphoning power now? M5: why are some of the KoA
allied? Nice touch with the puppies and roman chicks. Overall really enjoyable. Good to see a story getting into mythological Cult aspect of the KoA. Nice to see Alex again too, he's totally appropriate here, the dialogue was top-notch
[Tell] 2009-06-15 11: 22:14 Message From @Archdevil : difficulty wasn't too bad either. The only quibble was how cooperative the Malta were, considering they hate heroes.
[Tell] 2009-06-13 22: 52:20 Message From @Nebs : Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: Fun arc, challenging and interesting. Noticing a "strong female" theme between this story and "Escalation", not that that's a bad thing, hah. Nicely done!
I'm a published amateur comic book author: www.ericjohnsoncomics.com
******MA Arcs****
Arc 5909: "Amazon-Avatars"
Arc 6143: "Escalation" (Nominee: Architect Awards, Nominee: Player Awards, and Dev's Choice!)
Changes to Amazon-Avatars made on 6/29/09
starting to use some of the new stuff from Issue 15. yay!
-updated all the Avatar characters with power tweaks using the Custom setting for powers
-added emotes to all Avatar characters now that bosses actually use emotes properly
-extensive editing and trimming to text in Sounvenir clue, mostly to get back some memory space.
-modified patrols in Mission 5, eliminating duplicate patrols of extra factions.
-modified dialogue of Battles (KoA vs. KoA), to make sure they make more sense if the dialogue triggers when the player is far away, as seems to happen lately.
More changes to come as I tweak based on Issue 15 tools.
I'm a published amateur comic book author: www.ericjohnsoncomics.com
******MA Arcs****
Arc 5909: "Amazon-Avatars"
Arc 6143: "Escalation" (Nominee: Architect Awards, Nominee: Player Awards, and Dev's Choice!)
new Issue 15 things added on 6/29/09:
chosen Keywords: Custom Characters, Canon Related, Magic
Changed status from "Work in Progress" to "Looking for Feedback"
I'm a published amateur comic book author: www.ericjohnsoncomics.com
******MA Arcs****
Arc 5909: "Amazon-Avatars"
Arc 6143: "Escalation" (Nominee: Architect Awards, Nominee: Player Awards, and Dev's Choice!)
Changes made to Amazon-Avatars on 6/30/09
-added brief contact descriptions for Alexander
-more modifications to the Souvenir clue, to reduce overall length.
-added URL to end of Souvenir, pointing to promo poster art commission for this arc, on DeviantArt
I'm a published amateur comic book author: www.ericjohnsoncomics.com
******MA Arcs****
Arc 5909: "Amazon-Avatars"
Arc 6143: "Escalation" (Nominee: Architect Awards, Nominee: Player Awards, and Dev's Choice!)
Changes made 7/1/09
-used the new tools from Issue 15 to tweak appearance of standard mobs in Mission 5. Several encounters are now more appropriate in color scheme.
-added some new patrols with dialogue in mission five, clarifying some plot points.
-added some optional Allies to the final mission, in case final boss is too tough for some. They also provide some more dialogue and story.
-added boss emote in Mission one
-changed level range of Mission one manually. Moved from 35-54 to 41-54, to match the other 4 missions.
-changed Arc status from "Looking for Feedback" to "Final". Based on reviews and feedback, it's complete, though I'm always willing to make changes.
I'm a published amateur comic book author: www.ericjohnsoncomics.com
******MA Arcs****
Arc 5909: "Amazon-Avatars"
Arc 6143: "Escalation" (Nominee: Architect Awards, Nominee: Player Awards, and Dev's Choice!)
changes made 7/2/09
-since new level range controls went in with Issue 15, was able to replace my custom "surviving warrior" character model with an actual Warrior. The more exact match to the proper look is nice, and frees up a custom character's worth of memory if I need it in the future
I'm a published amateur comic book author: www.ericjohnsoncomics.com
******MA Arcs****
Arc 5909: "Amazon-Avatars"
Arc 6143: "Escalation" (Nominee: Architect Awards, Nominee: Player Awards, and Dev's Choice!)
Thanks to Tahlana for reccomending Amazon-Avatars in a forum thread. (this thanks is much overdue. sorry!)
Tahlana's MA Reccomendations
I'm a published amateur comic book author: www.ericjohnsoncomics.com
******MA Arcs****
Arc 5909: "Amazon-Avatars"
Arc 6143: "Escalation" (Nominee: Architect Awards, Nominee: Player Awards, and Dev's Choice!)
changes made 7/15/09:
-fixed the invalid arc status post patch
had to re-select the destructible objects in Mission Three
Apologies to anyone who went to play the arc while it was invalid!
I'm a published amateur comic book author: www.ericjohnsoncomics.com
******MA Arcs****
Arc 5909: "Amazon-Avatars"
Arc 6143: "Escalation" (Nominee: Architect Awards, Nominee: Player Awards, and Dev's Choice!)
Feedback would be much appreciated!
)
Several people who played this arc on Test really liked the story (including half of them not in my SG
Lots of clues and NPC dialogue. If you don't like reading what contacts say, you might not get the full effect, although there still are some custom enemies to enjoy fighting.
Title: Amazon-Avatars
Arc ID: 5909
Creators Global Name: @FemFury
Difficulty Level: Medium to Hard, depeding on AT. Best for 45+
Custom Bosses in 4th and 5th Missions. Knives and some Malta
Synopsis an ancient artifact unleashes dangerous goddesses on the world.
Number of EB/AVS 1 in final mission. (3 custom bosses in 4th mission though)
Story Type Serious
Mission Count: 5
Estimated Time to Play: never took me more than an hour
Note fairly story and text intensive. I wrote a lot of clues and NPC dialogue. So, if you don't like reading, probably not for you. Play on heroic to make custom bosses in 4th mission into LTs if you aren't confident.
Again, feedback much appreciated!
I'm a published amateur comic book author: www.ericjohnsoncomics.com
******MA Arcs****
Arc 5909: "Amazon-Avatars"
Arc 6143: "Escalation" (Nominee: Architect Awards, Nominee: Player Awards, and Dev's Choice!)