Tramontane

COME ON IN, folks! The Infront Steakhouse is open for business!

*Starts cooking steaks on an ice-grill*

Complimentary onion straws for all! How do you like your steaks?

*Yes, I said an ice-grill. Don't ask.*

Phillah! *HUGS*

*Shifty glance left*

*Shifty glance right*

*Freezes the Bunneh in ice*

*Snickers and scampers off*

*Nibbles the carrot*

Mmmm. Carrot.

No, Fedor! Don't do it! IT IS A TRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP!

*Mouth continues moving for several moments after he finishes speaking*

No love for the Sharpe series?

Ouch.

There's forty shillings on the drum
To those who volunteer to come
Enlist and fight the foe today
Over the hills and far away!

O'er the hills and o'er the main
Through Flanders, Portugal, and Spain
King George commands, and we obey
Over the hills and far away!

...

Oh. Um. Wrong song?

>.>

<.<

*Crash-lands in an ice capsule*

*Awakens dazed and disoriented*

Woooooo... hey, can I breathe in space?

Meh. Let's just pretend I'm batman.

*Passes out due to lack of oxygen*

*Freezes the tussle in ice*

I POSIT THAT THIS IS A CLEVER RUSE BETWEEN BREAKNECK BECKY AND FEDOR TO AVOID SUSPICION.

Clearly, THEY are the culprits!

*Dun-dun-DUUUUUUNNNNNNN*

Nerp. Um. Which thread should we use?

Also why is it every time I try to start the rookery something derps? XD

*Pulls a wagon containing sand an elaborite ice-castle into the Rookery Mansion. Outside, a storm rages. Inside, any one of us could die... and any one of us could be the culprit*

GUYS WATCH OUT. I HEAR THERE IS A MURDERER AMONG US.

*DUN-DUN-DUUNNNNNNN*

*Pokes the squid with a stick, freezes it, and hands the squid-on-a-stick to Fedor*

Squidsicle?

*Resumes forming his elaborate ice construction*

It's not sand, it's ice. Albeit particularly salty ice. Which isn't making my life any easier, incidentally, given the typical effect salt has on ice.

*Begins forming what appear to be branches toward the top of the central mass of ice*

*Begins sculpting the waves that crash in on the shore into an unidentifiable shape*

Hey, guys, sorry, I've been distracted by this thing.

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, I SUBMIT TO YOU:

Playing D&D with Batman.

*Stumbles in swaggering and singing Gaelic folk tunes loudly and off-key*

S-s-soI herd th'other thredd wasn'... wasn'...

What wazzaye sayin'?

Ay, fuggit. *Tosses back another pint of guinness*

*Dons sunglasses*

*Climbs snowy mountain*

*Looks down at the slope before him that heads straight into the Rookery ski chalet*

Awwww, yeah.

*BODY-SLEDS*

ETA: It's Thursday, derp.

Hmm.

Let me in on this tomfoolery and shenanigans, I say!

http://www.formspring.me/Snaerr

http://www.virtueverse.net/wiki/Snaerr

Snaerr has been somehow convinced to overcome his distaste for technology and fill out one of these!

Because Ozymandias is just as interesting as Batman and Iron Man, that's why.

I give you Snaerr, an ice-mage (Ice/Ice blaster Magic origin) with little skill to his name, other than flying, mystical Sight and half-decent Glamours.

(Also an extensive knowledge of the occult, but obviously in such a technologically-extensive setting that doesn't do a whole lot)

STEP ONE: Very carefully analyze the floor of my prison for the slightest flaws. Granted, this will not allow me to break the bars- I am, after all, a squishy wizard, and it is very tough- but it will allow me to proceed to...

STEP TWO- Begin to form ice in the flaws, then allow it to continually melt and refreeze, causing frost wedging. This will begin to weaken the floor, though still not sufficient to allow me to break them.

STEP FOUR- Lower the temperature of the floor as low as I am capable of- low enough, for instance, to make the material far more brittle, and thus vulnerable to-

STEP FIVE- Fly into the air, then send the biggest damn ice-bolt I can manage at the floor as hard as I can.

STEP SIX- Freeze the explosive devices in ice before they can explode- This would likely require intense timing, but it is within my theoretical limits. If possible, defuse the explosives before they can be reactivated. Rest and regain strength.

STEP SEVEN- Attempt to form allegiance with the prisoner in the cell below me. If successful, I have an ally, if not, I shall simply have to ensure he is not harmed in my escape attempt. If he attempts to attack me, I will simply have to overpower him through main force. It will be time consuming, but I believe that my control capabilities will be sufficient to overcome his regenerative capacity and render him non-hostile. If he causes damage too extensive, I suppose I won't be able to carry him out with me when I leave, as I am not a very physical person. Oh, well. If necessary, rest and regain my strength.

STEP EIGHT- Repeat the above process on the ceiling of my cell, creating an ice shield to protect against falling debris. Rest and regain my strength once again, then fly out of the cell, bringing the other prisoner with me if possible.

STEP NINE- Encase the attacking automatons in ice. The automatons have no heat based weaonry, aside from the missiles, and attempting to utilize the missile weaponry would obviously be a critical error on their part when the launcher is encased in ice. If the automatons cannot be contained at length in the ice, simply refreeze them and face them one at a time per standard combat tactics. This is when my fellow prisoner will be the most useful as an asset, and is of course to be kept alive at all costs. If necessary, use explosives recovered earlier in the encounter as a weapon. Rest and regain my strength.

STEP TEN- Blast through the floor above us via the previously mentioned process. Rest and regain my strength.

STEP ELEVEN- Bring my fellow prisoner to the main floor if possible. If not, simply fly to the above floor myself.

STEP TWELVE- Fly down the hallway, grab rebreather system. As my own metabolism works at unpredictable speeds and my compatriot has regenerative capabilities, we can take turns at the rebreather if necessary, on the assumption that the neurotoxin will not work at full effectiveness. If my system does succumb to the neurotoxin, I will at least have given my fellow prisoner a chance to escape that he would otherwise not have had.

STEP THIRTEEN- Locate the exit, and confront the Artificial Intelligence.

STEP FOURTEEN- Summon a Blizzard. The effects of the blizzard will considerably slow the movements of the mastermind's mechanical army, allowing us time to escape

STEP FIFTEEN- Flee. Like a boss.