Shagster

GlaziusF, thanks for a very detailed review.

I've made several changes based on your feedback, so I appreciate your helping to make my arc better.
To avoid a huge wall of text response, I'll focus mostly on your summary at the end.

[ QUOTE ]
Man, the cop is the only one worried about the threat level. Everybody else is all "where does she work out"?

[/ QUOTE ]

This gave me the idea for another hostage in the final map. This guy notes that everyone else is calm because they assume the heroes will handle, like always. He's the one who got a good look at Escalation's eyes, and knows how serious she is, and he's scared.
I was shooting for a contrast between the urgency of the situation, and the blase' assumption of some typical Atlas Park citizens that the heroes will fix everything.

[ QUOTE ]
Storyline - ****. Needs a little, at least, speculation early on about how the villain who's scraping up pennies in the first mission gets the funding to embark on a massive program of self improvement. As it was that was nagging at me until after I beat the boss of mission 4.

[/ QUOTE ]

Mission 2 briefing now explains that she got a bunch of cash out of the bank before the confrontation. Gives her plenty of seed capital to make it to Mission 4.

[ QUOTE ]
Also the ending's a little unsatisfying. It makes it seem like I dodged a bullet, that it just so happened she wasn't able to bail. (If nothing else you'd think she'd get rather uncomfortable in the Zig and eventually jump ship.)

[/ QUOTE ]

The clue now has more text on why she can't jump out of the end body. Allows for a mix of factors: her pride in the final clone, the psychic strain of animating so many clones in Mission 4, and the extreme modifications to the final body.

[ QUOTE ]
Design - *****. The customs are nice visuals, one and all, and the last map is a pretty nice restatement of the first.

Gameplay - ****. Mostly for having to boing back and forth across the first map so many dang times trying to figure out where she'd gotten off to this time.

[/ QUOTE ]

First map is now somewhat improved, I think. I set the main group to "Empty" and now all the spawns are scripted optional objectives, with the various types of robots, all executing crimes in support of Dr. Lashion's overall scheme. With the less dense spawning pattern, should let players find Dr. Lashion much faster.

Also, added a part to the briefing for Mission 1, pointing out that the robots by Dr. Lashion will have a red glow (story reason: Dr. Lashion is using the nearby robots as message and command relays).

My goal was to make hunting down Dr. Lashion *slightly* annoying, but not frustrating, to establish the "annoyance factor" of her "escape power". And it's important to the rest of the story to hammer in that she always seems to have a backup clone.

[ QUOTE ]
Detail - *****. Despite the little quibbles I had above the detail is fairly solid and does a nice job of fleshing out the central story.

Overall - ****. The ending strikes a bit of a sour note, and while the boss for Mission 4 was a pretty good fight, the end boss was basically that same fight with two intervals where I jumped away and stared at a wall for a few minutes. It needs a little more of a wrinkle than that.

[/ QUOTE ]

Hopefully, the improvements in Mission One spawning setup, and the plotline text additions have at least a chance to up your ratings in the Storyline and Gameplay categories.

As to the final fight, any suggestions to "add a wrinkle"? I'm not eager to add ambushes, given how tough Escalation Extreme is for most players. And I don't neccesarily want to add allies, since the plot and theme is supposed to make it more "hero vs. villain grudge match".

I suppose I could add a post-defeat ambush of robots trying to retrieve Escalation's unconscious form. Could even follow that with a Crey extraction team shouting "the Countess wants that woman analyzed!". Or Arachnos troops saying that the mad scientists want to see the results of the supplies they sent.
Thing is, that could end up being anti-climactic, after the big fight...

[ QUOTE ]

Escalation: Great custom enemy design, and the story was cool too.

[/ QUOTE ]

Eva, thanks for mentioning my arc in this thread. That's very gratifying.

Guess I better get together my list of favorites and post them here.

Thanks to Tahlana for reccomending Amazon-Avatars in a forum thread. (this thanks is much overdue. sorry!)

Tahlana's MA Reccomendations

"Escalation" got mentioned on the Arc Reccomendation.

Thanks to EvaDestruction for listing my arc among a list of very good arcs.

EvaDestruction reccomends "Escalation" in MA thread

changes made 7/7/09

-removed "Challenging" from keywords. Since this isn't specificially made to be a challenge arc, I'd prefer the text warnings in the Description.

-modified arc Description, including adding a URL to the promotional poster

-slight change to send-off briefing of Mission One. Dectective Becktrees gives a hint on how to find Dr. Lashion faster.

-added a new captive to rescue in Mission Five. This one reacts less calmly, and explains the calmness of the other hostages a bit in his dialogue.

-Major modifications to the spawns in Mission One.
Should be much easier to track down Dr. Lashion now, as the map's default group is now "Empty", and all spawns aside from Dr. Lashion are scripted optional objectives.

changes made 7/2/09

-since new level range controls went in with Issue 15, was able to replace my custom "surviving warrior" character model with an actual Warrior. The more exact match to the proper look is nice, and frees up a custom character's worth of memory if I need it in the future

Changes made 7/1/09

-used the new tools from Issue 15 to tweak appearance of standard mobs in Mission 5. Several encounters are now more appropriate in color scheme.

-added some new patrols with dialogue in mission five, clarifying some plot points.

-added some optional Allies to the final mission, in case final boss is too tough for some. They also provide some more dialogue and story.

-added boss emote in Mission one

-changed level range of Mission one manually. Moved from 35-54 to 41-54, to match the other 4 missions.

-changed Arc status from "Looking for Feedback" to "Final". Based on reviews and feedback, it's complete, though I'm always willing to make changes.

Changes made to Amazon-Avatars on 6/30/09

-added brief contact descriptions for Alexander

-more modifications to the Souvenir clue, to reduce overall length.

-added URL to end of Souvenir, pointing to promo poster art commission for this arc, on DeviantArt

Changes made 6/30/09

The post-Issue-15 tweaking continues!

-tweaked the Sounvenir clue, including multiple reasons WHY the last fight ended the way it did, based on Dr. Lashion's actions and motivations.

-tweaked mission 2 briefing, clarifying that Dr. Lashion had already gotten some cash out of the bank, which helps fund her activities in future missions

-changed the "serial number" on cloning tube clue to a number on the side of the tube, showing it to be part of a larger production lot. better terminology use, basically.

-changed level range of all the missions to Start at level 20. The maps are all custom mobs, and technically, any level could run it, but there are both story and game mechanic concerns. Story wise: Detective Becktrees is supposed to be asking the help of a fairly experienced hero to deal with what appears to be an easy problem... at first. Game Mechanics: I can't see very many pre-SO characters taking on the later missions, so I might need to "warn away" lower level characters.

-added contact description for Detective Becktrees.

-added URL in the sounvenir, linking to the promo poster for this arc.

Arc Name: Escalation

Arc ID: 6143

Keywords: Challenging, Custom Characters, Canon Related

Length: Very Long (5 missions)

Morality: Heroic

Enemy Groups: Custom Group

Description: Begin with a basic, easy to beat supervillainess mad scientist. But once the grudge is formed, things escalate!

Also, check out the promo art poster in the forum thread (see the link in my sig for the thread)

Link to promo poster on Rob's Deviant Art page:
Escalation promo poster

Arc Name: Amazon-Avatars

Arc ID: 5909

Keywords: Custom Characters, Canon Related, Magic

Length: Very Long (5 missions)

Morality: Heroic

Enemy Groups: Knives of Artemis, Malta, Circle of Thorns, Custom Group

Description: Recover an ancient artifact, interfere in the secret rituals of the Knives of Artemis, and egnage in combat with some Greek Goddesses.

Also, check out the promo art poster in the forum thread (see the link in my sig for the thread)

Direct link to promo poster on Deviant Art:
Amazon-Avatars poster on Rob Banbury's DevArt page

new Issue 15 things added on 6/29/09:

chosen Keywords: Challenging, Custom Characters, Canon Related

Changed status from "Work in Progress" to "Looking for Feedback"

new Issue 15 things added on 6/29/09:

chosen Keywords: Custom Characters, Canon Related, Magic

Changed status from "Work in Progress" to "Looking for Feedback"

Changes to Amazon-Avatars made on 6/29/09

starting to use some of the new stuff from Issue 15. yay!

-updated all the Avatar characters with power tweaks using the Custom setting for powers

-added emotes to all Avatar characters now that bosses actually use emotes properly

-extensive editing and trimming to text in Sounvenir clue, mostly to get back some memory space.

-modified patrols in Mission 5, eliminating duplicate patrols of extra factions.

-modified dialogue of Battles (KoA vs. KoA), to make sure they make more sense if the dialogue triggers when the player is far away, as seems to happen lately.

More changes to come as I tweak based on Issue 15 tools.

Changes made to Escalation today 6/29

starting to take advantage of the Issue 15 new functions

- slight modifications to final boss fight, tweaking powers using the new Custom option. Careful! She's still nasty!

-added emotes to various bosses in all missions now that emotes actually work on bosses

More changes to come as I fiddle with Issue 15

Here's some selected feedback recieved on Escalation

please note, some changes to the arc since the earlier feedback.

[Tell] 2009-05-02 13: 33:35 Message From @Logrus : Feedback on Architect Mission Escalation: I couldn't finish it (since it's challenging to get a team to take down an AV for the last mission). I like the story, but perhaps put in a useful ally (e.g., something to slow regeneration rate a la /Rad defender) to help out. I did like how she got bigger. I wonder if you could change her outfit slightly as well, perhaps to more ominous colors etc. Good work though.

[Tell] 2009-05-03 15: 14:08 Message From @Daz'Ender : Feedback on Architect Mission Escalation: Nice, i love this arc that the story is well worth finishing to the end. Kinda wish i could have taken the final by myself but i got my lit bro and after dieing almost ten times we killed (captured) her good. gotta say nice power picks on the minions, i attacked my fisrt grp and they kicked my [censored], had to start pulling after that. you most diffenently get a thumbs up from me.

[Tell] 2009-05-03 19: 43:54 Message From @Canuck : Feedback on Architect Mission Escalation: Run and balaned, exactly as described. I really liked it.

[Tell] 2009-05-18 21: 25:57 Message From @Paula : Feedback on Architect Mission Escalation: Yikes, I'm glad I brought my Mastermind! Thanks for the warning, it was exactly as advertised! 5 stars. Anyway, thanks again for playing the Tutorial arc. I've got two others you actually might enjoy - 1481 for shorter and silly, 3586 for more serious. Have fun!

[Tell] 2009-05-18 13: 01:28 Message From @Beanstalk1 : Feedback on Architect Mission Escalation: Exellent story, nicely told, the text from the doc during the mishes was great, made me smile no end. The power progression was nice, good difficulty throughout, thought she was gonna have me in the final mish, despite being a wp scrapper with qr and stam, almost ran out of end against her. Good fun if ya get a chacne please try arc 91644

[Tell] 2009-05-19 17: 30:14 Message From @Mountie : Feedback on Architect Mission Escalation: Fun arc. I enjoyed how it felt like the villain had an arc that was counter to the player's. Wouldn't mind seeing Escalation reappear in another arc sometime.

[Tell] 2009-05-20 17: 13:02 Message From @Mr Squid : Feedback on Architect Mission Escalation: A fun arc with a nice gimmick that doesent overplay itself. Honestly though, I can find hardly anything wrong with it. Every time I began to wonder about something it would be answered, every time I began to get bored, the mission ended. Its pretty much airtight all around. Five Stars.

[Tell] 2009-05-22 01: 45:39 Message From @Night-Girl : Feedback on Architect Mission Escalation: Great story and concept

[Tell] 2009-05-22 20: 24:55 Message From @Sister Jeanne : Feedback on Architect Mission Escalation: Just ran this, Very VERY well done. Well plotted, great clues. 5/5 stars.

[Tell] 2009-05-22 11: 38:59 Message From @Modern Myth : Feedback on Architect Mission Escalation: Just finished 'Escalation'. Excellent arc, very nicely done. 5 stars.

[Tell] 2009-05-23 13: 12:58 Message From @PW : Feedback on Architect Mission Escalation: Dragged a 4 player team through love the improvements. Thanks and good luck!

[Tell] 2009-05-23 14: 36:16 Message From @Zubenelgenubi : it's been clear from the start where this was going to go, but it's been well-executed. Writing is clear, tight, and free of typos.

[Tell] 2009-05-23 15: 20:10 Message From @Zubenelgenubi : VERY nice arc. long, but that's necessary for the story. EB at end required 2 trys with a full-on compliment of tier III insps and presents, but my blaster soloed her. very nice job. 5 stars for joo!

[Tell] 2009-05-23 15: 42:28 Message From @Dark Ignis : Feedback on Architect Mission Escalation: Well done. I like the concept and you did a good job escalating.

[Tell] 2009-05-25 15: 13:34 Message From @ICSpark : Feedback on Architect Mission Escalation: Thank you for the story arc. I enjoyed watching the Dr. slowly lose it. Your warning about the last version is very fair. She is tough! One note, I thought that the first mission would be better with 3 defeats (doing something 3 times is funnier than 4). I look forward to your next arc. Good hunting!

[Tell] @Zereck Goldmoon: Feedback on Architect Mission Escalation: A thoroughly enjoyable arc. Very minor nits concerning punctuation (2 spaces after periods in NPC chatter even though contact has 1) and a small mispell in the /info for the Wounded Strike Force Member ("safelty"), but those nits aside, this was a quality arc. I guess I can buy she became too attached to the new body because she's gotten so crazy and powerful. 5 stars.

[Tell] 2009-06-06 08: 19:51 Message From @BOLT 3 : Feedback on Architect Mission Escalation: Nice story. I liked the dialog particularly, the fight
at the end was just right (solo'd with an inv/em tanker on level 2, lots of defense IO sets). The warning is appropriate though! Good job.

[Tell] 2009-06-06 11: 35:39 Message From @ShadowTarget : Feedback on Architect Mission Escalation: Great, great job! I hope the developers notice this one because it is very well written, original and fun to play!

[Tell] 2009-06-08 17: 03:43 Message From @Most Definitely Skary : Feedback on Architect Mission Escalation: Mmm. Love it. Have some tickets and a spot on my SG's reccomendation list. Ice/SS vs Inv/SS = much fun. And running away from Rage.

[Tell] 2009-06-09 02: 18:51 Message From @Crasical : Feedback on Architect Mission Escalation: Good arc! Enjoyed playing through it, although the EB pounded my poor Archery blaster into mush until I deployed a Shivan.

[Tell] 2009-06-11 00: 55:32 Message From @Lock0n : Feedback on Architect Mission Escalation: This arc was tons of fun. Great work, and terrific boss fight at the finale! Top notch all the way around. Thanks for the great writing.

[Tell] 2009-06-12 17: 03:18 Message From @Nebs : Feedback on Architect Mission Escalation: LOVED it. Personal fan of self-improvement villain characters, loved the transition from silly to serious. Thumbs up!

[Tell] 2009-06-14 01: 23:08 Message From @Tahlana : Feedback on Architect Mission Escalation: That was fun, really like the way the fights scaled up, really good design!

[Tell] 2009-06-14 01: 23:50 Message From @Lazorman : Feedback on Architect Mission Escalation: Fun mission! My wife and I had really enjoyed your Amazon story, so we were looking forward to playing this one. I really enjoyed the building rivalry and growing obsession of Dr. Lashion... it unfolded very nicely. The missions were all fast-paced, the enemies well balanced, and the arc never dragged. Very enjoyable. 5 stars!

Here's a sampling of feedback recieved on Amazon-Avatars so far:
(note some adjustments and fixes made since these feedbacks recieved)

[Tell] 2009-04-22 20: 16:04 Message From @Devcon : Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: WOW. Not only did you make a Malta/Knives arc that makes sense, you also made it ENJOYABLE. This is what MA should be about!!! Aside from one typo in the 4th mission, this was FLAWLESS!

[Tell] @Fiery Mistress: Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: Wonderful mission, story and writing; only issues was a minor spelling issue in the Hestia Avatar's conversation, and in the last mission briefing, the statement "Malta has even less reason to see her succeed than us" is a bit ackward; maybe replace reason with desire? Also the Avatar of Artemis was a bit weak as an EB. I had more difficulty with the three bosses in the prior mission than with her as a level 50 stone melee / electricity aura brute (running on +4 difficulty).

[Tell] 2009-05-22 17: 41:43 Message From @Sister Jeanne : Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: Superbly done. excellent atmosphere, clues and very good plotline. I especially enjoyed the Athena and Aphrodite dialogue, as wella s the thematics in the final mission. 5/5 stars

[Tell] 2009-05-25 04: 41:59 Message From @ICSpark : Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: Thank you for your arc. I enjoyed it a lot. The writing was very good and the custom enemies were well done. I look forwarded to playing more of your arcs. Good hunting!

[Tell] @Casual Player: Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: Excellent MA arc. I look forward to seeing this made into a dev's choice.

[Tell] @Lazorman: Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: Great story arc, I loved the use of mythology!

[Tell] @Tahlana: Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: Great arc Well written and designed! I enjoyed it and the boss fights were alot of fun!

[Tell] 2009-05-31 10: 47:16 Message From @Matres : Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: Great Arc. 5 Stars! one possible plot hole though, you say that you don't want the Freedom Phalanx helping because Statesmans
being an avatar might make the other avatars stronger, but what happens if the players character is an avatar or has some other strong connection to a god/goddess?

[Tell] 2009-06-01 07: 04:51 Message From @Riley Delacroix : Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: I felt a little disappointed, the difficulty was actually very low. Liked the story though. Played it at diff. 4 on an ill/rad, ate the mobs for lunch.

[Tell] 2009-06-15 11: 20:58 Message From @Archdevil : Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: M2: Malta guy talked a bit too easily. M3: Artifact clue should be "depicts", the Malta dialogue was too friendly, IMO. M4 send off, should be "you will be led," "Brethren warriors" maybe should be "warrior brethren?" They're siphoning power now? M5: why are some of the KoA
allied? Nice touch with the puppies and roman chicks. Overall really enjoyable. Good to see a story getting into mythological Cult aspect of the KoA. Nice to see Alex again too, he's totally appropriate here, the dialogue was top-notch
[Tell] 2009-06-15 11: 22:14 Message From @Archdevil : difficulty wasn't too bad either. The only quibble was how cooperative the Malta were, considering they hate heroes.

[Tell] 2009-06-13 22: 52:20 Message From @Nebs : Feedback on Architect Mission Amazon-Avatars: Fun arc, challenging and interesting. Noticing a "strong female" theme between this story and "Escalation", not that that's a bad thing, hah. Nicely done!

Hopefully, the image will be posted directly here soon, but for anyone wanting a preview of the flier for Amazon-Avatars, I'll link to the DeviantArt page of the artist, Rob Banbury.

He did a great job on the flier for Escalation, and I think he did a great job on this one too!

Amazon-Avatars flier on DeviantArt

Hope people like the pic!

[ QUOTE ]
You get 3 arc slots for free (well, for your subscription cost).

I have a real job, so I have no problem paying $20 for 5 more arc slots.

I realize a bunch of people are going to complain about the cost, because it's "just storage space" (not considering the cost it took for the devs to actually create Mission Architect), but consider that you pay more than that for:
* Dinner in a restaurant. And that's just, you know, ingredients that probably cost almost nothing.
* An oil change. That's just some cheap chemicals, after all! Why should it be so expensive?
* A hardcover book. It's made of paper for chrissake! You can get blank paper for way cheaper, what's with the huge markup?
* A ticket to a concert or sporting event. That's not even something material! It's just rental of a seat for a couple hours! Why should it cost money at all?

In summary, everything is a rip off! But CoH is less of a ripoff than most.

[/ QUOTE ]

Incredibly well said, PW.

Heck, everyone should stop and consider how this could apply to themselves and their jobs.

I work at a hotel. Hey, the room is just gonna sit empty anyway, someone could say, if they don't come in and take it. So why not rent the room to them for just the labor cost of cleaning staff?
and when the guest leaves the hotel, they've got nothing to show for, no physical goods. What a ripoff!

As PW says, the arc slots are less a "rip-off" than just about everything else out there.

Besides, there's another value to putting a price on something. If something costs real money, some people will choose not to get it. That's a filtering mechanism. If there is a cost, it's a deterrent to those who don't really care, getting them to not participate.

Of course, as Venture observes, enthusiasm is hardly an assurance of any kind of quality. But, at least it provides a barrier to entry to those who are sloppy writers because they just don't care really....

[ QUOTE ]
Just as a note, on request I'm happy to repost any of my reviews (or at least the rating and summary section of it) to the City of Heroes Mission Review site. I don't do this by default because not all story arcs are listed there. Feel free to post your reviews of my story arcs there if you like, also (this isn't required to get a review or anything though).


[/ QUOTE ]

Both may arcs are listed on that site.
So, if you'd post your ratings and summaries of Escalation and Amazon-Avatars to COH Mission review, that'd be great!

At some point, I'm planning on sitting down doing some reviews and ratings on that site, just got to find the time for it. I'll have to make sure your arcs are among the first I rate there.

[ QUOTE ]
Thunderkiss, Level 50 Energy/Elec Blaster.
In this case, give me the unloved, the groan-worthy, the pain in the butt guys that have some of the best story potential. I want stories focused around Malta, Knives of Artemis, or Rularuu. Nobody will play your arc because it contains those guys? Well I will. She's pretty tough for a Blaster, I can handle a downgraded AV or three, as long as the missions aren't filled with customs with KB and Mez protection.

[/ QUOTE ]

You might give my "Amazon-Avatars" a try, Arc #5909.

Knives, Malta, and some customs, but the customs aren't obscene. One downgraded AV for final fight, but it's one without a defensive set.
And I have soloed the arc with multiple blasters during testing (although, those were also "bit tougher than the average blaster" blasters)

Recent Changes in "Escalation"

6/8/09
*Changed map used in Mission 4 to a different "tech lab"
This will both spread out the optional collection goals a bit more, and also eliminate a rare thing where final boss spawned too close to an optional boss, causing possibly tougher fight than intended.

6/9/09
*Added navigation text for optional goals in mission four. With more spread out objects to click, a list to let player know they were out there seemed fair

*color coded missions goals in Mission One. should make it visually clearer when the goal changes due to chained goals.

6/10/09
*added a new type of robot in Mission Four. This will help dilute the number of web-gernade using clones in general spawns on that map.

*removed captive rescue optional goal from mission 4, to make enough memory room for additional custom critter.

Amazon-Avatars won 5th place in Projectionist's arc contest!

and considering that the arcs in 1st through 4th places are all ones I admire quite a bit as good ones, I'm quite happy with that showing.



Winner's List for Projectionist's Contest

changes made 6/8/09

-apparently, a typo edit during the weekend had caused a change in the faction file. The "Escalation" faction had lost it's robots again!

apologies to anyone who played the arc over the weekend, and ran into crazy amounts of clones in Mission 4, instead of the clone / robot mix I intended.

fixed now!

"Amazon-Avatars" got a nice mention in PoliceWoman's War Journal as well.

Police Woman's War Journal - mention of "Amazon Avatars" in last paragraph

relevant quote:
[ QUOTE ]
A stalker friend joined me and we duoed through Amazon-Avatars, which was about a Knives of Artemis plot to make some of their number get possessed by the souls (and powers) of classical Greek goddesses. This seems exactly the sort of thing the KoA would be into, I thought. The story started a little slow but I like the mythological premise, the dialog was really good and I liked how each of the goddess-avatars had her own personality. I gave it 5 stars.

[/ QUOTE ]