The Fracturing of Time, Arc ID 171031, by @Tahlana. Very long (2 uniwue, 1 medium, 1 long map), Heroic, lvl range 25-54 (with the last 2 missions being 41-54. Ill be taking
Scoop Malloy, my lvl 25 Inv/Superstrength Tanker. He might be a little low for the last two missions, but well see.
Another beer, please, Joe
and one for my friend here
wassat? Oh, right
Joe, scratch that second beer
no, belay that scratch give it to me, Ill have it
and a whiskey for my friend. One for me too, what the hell
So where was I, friend
oh yeah, this crazy dream Id been having, like for weeks! About this black shadowy figure, burning with a white fire
[comedy shudder]
I tell ya, it was awful
but last night, last night
I tell ya, it was like
awful! I couldnt wake up! And this time, it spoke to me! Said it was from an alien planet or somewhere called Kyrdos, all green and gorgeous, cept it was bein invaded by these creepy alien guys called the Raigaus. The Kyrdosi had invented a doohickey that could save em, but they needed
me to go activate it! Some such boohickey about different universes and all that labtalk, I dont know about that. Magics more my cup o java, ya know what I mean?
so what could I do? I pinched myself...in my sleep, I mean. You ever been pinched by someone with superstrength?
what? Oh, yeah, heh, I did say that, didnt I?
yeah, I wasnt lyin, I only got my powers when Im wearing my magic belt
no, I dont sleep with it on every night
well, if ya must know, I kinda had compny.
Im invulnerable with the belt on, see? An Molly, shes kind of a scratcher, if you catch my drift
hey, I got sensitive skin!
anyway, it didnt work. I couldnt wake up
so I hadda just go along with it, ya know? I kind of swooned out, an found myself on this other planet. Green and gorgeous? I dont know what kind of cockamamie travel agent this Fractured One was, but this place was a disaster zone! There was this big crystal building I hadda go in, all metal pillars and dark corridors
[The custom contact looks suitably mysterious, and I like the framing of the mission briefing a lot. Italics are used for describing actions leading up to me entering the building. This arc obviously just uses the AE building as a simple storytelling device, and isnt meant to be literally where Scoop is standing or what have you. Someone in another thread mentioned viewing the AE building, the array, etc, in a similar way as we can view training at Ms Liberty, for example in RP terms, my scientists new powers can come from experimenting in his lab, they arent handed to him by Ms Liberty (or Blue Steel, or whoever lol) right there on her podium. Expanding my idea of how stories can be told from my initially much more narrow simulation or say the arrays a magic door or teleport hub etc scope has hugely benefited my own enjoyment of arcs]
Mission 1: Save the Kyrdos from the Raigaus
so I went inside this half-ruined building, right, an activated my magic belt
yeah, thats the one
here, feel
see that? Thats a proto-emerald. Whats a proto-emerald? Its like
the original archetype emerald, the template that all other emeralds were made from by the Crystaline Conjuroranelne Arathapathathath in the ages before man
howd I get it? Joe, another whiskey! Have another whiskey and shaddup, stop askin questions
this aint the time for that story
so anyway, I went all super and stuff, and marched into this citadel place
and there were all these demon winged red dragon things
with knives! Nasty little bastards, I tell ya. I went at it with a few, they were tough, too!
[The Raigaus customs are nicely designed, looking like demons, with lizard heads and wings. They have high defense, I think, Scoops missing more than hitting. Next mission Ill have to stock up on acc inspirations]
I found a Kyrdosi scientist bein roughed up by some of the lizards. After shed been freed, she told me how to operate their transcendence gadget. it was goin to transform the whole race of them into energy beings, she said, then they could just
whoosh! off to another world! Useful trick to have when the bar bill comes, eh friend?
[The Kyrdosi customs I liked a lot. Blue-skinned space elves, is how I could call them.]
a little further on, I joined forces with a Kyrdosi fighter, a little dude with a big shield, and he tagged along with me while I looked for the device
[Hes useful, but a little slow, lol. We found a battle going on, and after we help the other Kyrdosi beat off the Raigaus, I move away and he stays for a little bit longer than usual, maybe to chat lol!
]
In a large chamber deep inside the building, we found another Kyrdosi champion engaged with the enemy, and joined up with him. The three of us battled our way through the damn demons to a strange machine at the far end; it was the Transcendence Device I was lookin for. I activated it whilst my two new buddies held off the Raigaus
Wowzer, what a noise! When that machine switched on, it was like
you ever had your ears syringed? Like theres this sudden
loud clarity, and all the base is really, ya know,
bassy? it weas like that, only more apocalyptic
I was all ready to wake up then, ya know, I was wonderin what was for breakfast, ya cvatch my drift?
but the Kyrdosi werent having any of that. Their buddies outside the base had all been turned to energy beins, sure, but theyd be stayin here to die, apparently, an they still had a score to settle with the big cheese runnin the Raigaus. Yours truly hadda go settle his bill
[Hmm
I remember now that I have played this before, and Im enjoying it a lot more this time round (taking my time, is key I think), but one small negative is I think the maps a
little bit too big. What is it, 4 floors? Minor nitpick]
We fought on, deeper into the base, and it got darker and more
hell, red? Emergency lighting, maybe, I dunno
anyway, we found the head honcho, big flyin lizard by the name of Worldslayer Krezyrax! Pfff, Worldslayer, Schmurldslayer. He was a pansy! Me an my buddies took him to bruiseville on the black-eye express!
[The boss was fairly easy. No complaints, though. One odd thing happened. After defeating the boss, the Nav objective didnt go away, because his attendant had spawned on the gantry above. I moved away to get him, and some more mobs aggroed me, and the two allies just stood like lemons over Krezyrax body until I took the mobs back to them. They were definitely slow to follow me. Weird]
So with that done, I could wake up, right? Slip outta bed, pop down to Chachis an get some fresh bagels and coffee for Molly, ya know, help her get her strength back, eh?
nope, that creepy black fiery dude still hadnt finished with me
sheesh, shy couldnt I dream of succubi or somethin?
Anyway, this strange dark guy told me that the Kyrdosi had got zapped out of their physical plane all right, but they were trapped somewhere called the Void Shadow
sounds like a swell place, huh? Hey Molly, you fancy a romantic weekend away? Maui? Hula Bula? Paris? No, I know, how about the VOID SHADOW?
Well, this
person wanted me to go to the edge of the Void Shadow to see if I could find out what was up with the Kyrdosi. Since I was dreamin, I figured sure, what the heck, itd pass the time till mornin!
Mission 2: Discover What Became of the Kyrdosi
Then somethin really weird happened
for an instant, I thought I recognized this guy
which was impossible, since he was just a shadow, apart from the white fire of course. No features I could make out
anyway, before I knew it I was in some odd creepy caves, all sorts of misty stuff wafting about and strange glop dripping off the ceiling
I explored a bit, and met some
apparitions or somethin, they looked like bloody, ghostly versions of the Kyrdosi. They werent happy to see me, I tell ya, friend
attacked me with dark misty smoke and these psychic screams
after Id helped em, too! One of them said that Id unmade them, that what theyd become was my fault! I was just doin what that loopy shadow guy was tellin me to!
sheesh, honestly, its a thankless job, this heroin, I tell ya, friend
what?
well thats mighty fine of ya ta say
why yes, I think I will
Hey, Joe, two more of each over here, when youre done?
[The Blood Echoes and Soul Echoes look the business, suitably dark versions of the Kyrdosi. Their bios are nicely atmospheric. Im not sure if its because Scoops build is a little weak (hes always struck me as a tad light-hitting), but they take a fair bit of pounding to drop, especially the Soul Echo Lieuts. Are they on hard or higher? No complaints, however, Im not in any trouble]
I kept exploring this loopy place, an everywhere I found these
echoes, they attacked me. I met one guy, screamed that Id ruined them all, that hed destroy my universe!
Now, you ever been in a dream, an youre not sure if youre dreamin or not? I started feelin a bit like this, round about then
I mean, havin cheese dreams is one thing, but I been around Paragon enough ta know that theres things around, an when they say stuff like Im gonna destroy the UNIVERSE!, well, sometimes theyre just crazy, but sometimes theyre crazy but they can do it, ya know? So I admit, I got a little worried
after explorin a bit more, I was attacked by another one, screamin that she was fractured, that it was my fault
it looked to me like maybe not all of the Kyrdosi had been transcended into energy, ya get me? I dont mean not all the people, I mean like only half their essence or whatever got carried over
[Right. During this mission, I realized I was really enjoying this arc. The trio of bosses have great bios and dialogue, the mission is a lovely shortish
portrayal of their plight. The animations for each of them are nice, too. Top banana.]
I felt myself fading out of that nutty cavern place, and that fiery dark dude was there again, speaking ta me. He said that the Kyrdosi were lost now, angry echoes of themselves bent on destroyin
well, Time, is what he said. Great! I began ta hope I
was dreamin after all. Why cant I just have a nice weekend, huh? I takes a broad ta the theater, has a little fun, goes to sleep an now Im responsible for destroyin an entire civilization an creatin undead magic furies who want to burrow into Time itself and destroy the Universe? I dont remember explodin a mirror factory recently!
The dude told me I hadda stop them, an he didnt even know if Id survive goin back into the Void Shadow again
yeah, friend, it just gets better an better, huh?
Mission 3: Stop the Echoes from Fracturing Time
[Ive noticed that your Subtitles for each mission have inconsistent capitalization, btw.]
Back into the Void Shadow, my teeth were set on edge by this really nasty crystal grinding, humming noise
sheesh, it was like
yuck
I had to hurry, find out what was happenin
hey Joe, fill er up, will ya?
[Hmm
Rikti cavern map
not what I expected
]
I couldnt stand that sound, so I put some train on, rushin through the place lookin for anythin wrong. I soon found it, some of those echoes doin somethin weird ta some kind of
fracture in reality
I guess that was what Time looked like!
[lol I just discovered why Scoops missing a lot he doesnt have any accuracy enhancements! LMAO what a noob!]
I hadda stop then damage they were doin to it. I started on the echoes fiddlin with it, and that seemed ta do the trick
[Have you thought maybe of using Defendable objects for the fractures rather than the destructibles? The Nictus crystals you use look great, but smashing the Fracture up to seal it seems odd. Im not sure if there are issues with defendables at present though, or if the choice of objects isnt big enough? Perhaps you could alter the text slightly, to explain that the objects were wrapped around the Fracture inn Time, eroding it (they rotate, dont they?) then, destroying them would make more sense as youd be destroying the thing that was fracturing time rather than the fracture itself
er, thats just a suggestion lol.
I liked the ambush that spawned with this objective, BTW. If I was on a more reliably hard-hitting toon, Id be clearing more of these Echoes, theyre fun to fight.]
I found some more of the things, an dealt with them too, an then, my ears still filled with the horrible sound, I bumped into an Echo who was rantin that hed make me pay an that they could make bigger Fractures, an it wasnt over
ya know, the usual kind of stuff the villains all shout
[Hm
Ive sealed all the fractures and defeated the boss, but the Nav reads Find a way to stop the Echoes
Ive been everywhere on the map
]
I explore a bit more, lookin for an answer
[ah! I think maybe the Boss was the way to stop the echoes
his bio said something about that
maybe I didnt defeat all his attendants
hmm, where was he? lol
In or near a big room I think
Ill check all the big rooms]
After bein assaulted by another Echo, I decided Id found all I could, an let myself drift off ta
I dunno
half-sleepyland?
[Yes, that was it. Since the Nav doesnt specifically mention defeating the boss, maybe you could make him a only boss needed for encounter complete objective, so anyone stealthing or not reading bios and not clearing all wont get confused. Dont change the Nav, though it fits the vague atmosphere.
Im not crazy about that map, however. The Rikti corridors seem a bit too ordered and straight for the Void Shadow. I guess you didnt want too many caves? How about a Cimeroran one? If you like the Rikti map, its pluses are that its a nice manageable size and it hasnt got any annoying sidebranches]
So once I was back in that limbo dreamstate or whatever, with Suspiciously Familiar Black Fiery Dude, he told me that I still had ta stop up some realm big time fractures, but that I[d have ta become a Void creature ta do it! An that would probably kill me! Joe, two more beers and two more whiskeys.
So I hadda become unstuck in time and space, the dude said
yeah, I bet ya are, thats a lotta whiskey youre puttin away, heh
but anyhow, this unstuck
ifying
the fractured shadow guy wasnt happy about that at all, he said Id have ta
hic
have ta destroy the strongest aspects of myself
whatever that meant
heck, I was in for a dollar, in for a
thing, ya know?
Missiomn 4: Become Unstuck in Time
[love that title]
I tried ta touch him, but my hand passed straight through, an then I was
somewhere
somewhere not nice.
it looked like Atlas Park had been ripped up from the earth and dropped into Hell. There was fire, and smoke, and sounds, and a red burning sky, and it was
me
all of it, I cant explain, but it was me
my memories, my hopes
me. An I had to destroy it.
[Oh for a shadow shard map, eh?
The ruined Atlas map is fine for this, though. The elemental mobs used as the Fragments of Memory are lovely]
How do ya destroy yourself, unmake yourself? What am I? That was what I asked myself, buddy
what makes a man, a man?
here, Joe, another two
leave the bottle
What makes me me? My mind, maybe
ya know that I won the Pulitzer? Im a journalist
yeah, I like my mind
we been through a lot together
but it hadda go
what else?
what else keeps me
focused, ya know, keeps me grounded
well, theres this gal see
what? Nah, Mollys a nice enough broad, but she aint the one
the gal Im talkin about, she dont know
but shes special
real special
redhead, ya know? Irish
real firecracker
so love, thats it too. And love, heh
love brings hope. Whichll kill ya, buddy, before youre dead
right now, see, I was in this crazy mixed-up place, this squirming freaky rendition of my own psyche or whatever, an I was hopin, an I mean
really hopin that it was all a dream
cos I was about ta go lookin for my own personality, an erase it
drink up, friend
I found an echo of my
mind
first
a freakish thing
it spoke to me as I beat it into nothingness
heh, how apt
my fists
brute animal mindlessness, pulverizing my intellect
after it was smoke, then gone, I felt dulled, like mentally anaesthetized
I felt
stupid
it was horrible
it made me angry. I cast about like a frenzied brute, lookin for somethin to blame for my mental
truncation, somethin to smash
I was lookin for somethin, an what coalesced up outta the ground was an echo of my love
my love
an I fell upon it like a murderer
it spoke too, reminding me of all the things I was losing as I raged and killed it with blunt irrational hate
I killed my love
[awesome mission. fairly simple mechanically, probably take about 5 mins tops if I was Flying and intent on speed, but it should be sipped, really, this one]]
after that, my rage subsided, I still felt
dumb
an now I was
bereft, too. I thought of her, an I felt nothing
it was terrible, buddy
what is a man, without his mind, and without love? Hes a man without hope. As soon as I conceived this, it appeared, an echo of all my hopes
laughing, taunting me
because I already had none. I ran at it and attacked without thought or pity.
After that, I wandered, aimless, a dull, loveless, hopeless
thing
I was ravin, ya know, trying to erase all memory of what Id been
[Great mission. The text is sublime, really. MMO poetry.]
I drifted, then, buddy
until the being spoke to me again
he said that he was
me
a fractured echo of me, drifting in the Void
I could fully enter the void now I had unmade myself
broken my connection to Time
yeah
yeah I do need another shot
I had to move deeper into the Void, to close the gaping rents that the Echoes of the Kyrdosi were making
what did I have to lose
?
Mission 5: Save Time
I walked into the heart of the Void Shadow. I didnt look back
[Cimerora map ah, lol, I see why you didnt use one earlier
]
I moved calmly through the shadowy Void, an found a
trapped
manifestation of
all the things of my past
all the things that I had loved
that makes sense, right buddy? We cant love the present, because pssh! Its gone
and we dont know the future
maybe all that we love is behind us
at least, thats what I felt then
it told me it could restore my Love, if I could heal Time, but I thought it was mocking me
if only I still had Hope
I freed it, moved on, deeper, and the Echo of What Was followed me, hovering by my shoulder
like an angel
I found more Echoes of the Kyrdosi, and I fought them, and it didnt help, it just silently floated, my past, with me and yet unreachable
I cried as I fought, friend
I cried for what I once had
I found another fragment
an Echo of my future
what would be
it was struggling
struggling to
be
after I freed it, it promised to return my Hope, an followed on, too, at my side, reminding me of the great Loss to come
I was gonna die, remember?
After more twists and turns, I found one more echo
the Echo of What Is. It was
me, my present state, there an then
everything I was an could do. It spoke to me too, after I freed it, promising to return my Mind to me. Then it assumed its silent place amongst its brothers, following my heavy tread deeper inta the Void
[I love the animations of the trapped Echoes, and the way they follow me about is eerie and very effective. They look fantastic.]
After an unimaginable time, I found a rift in space, on of the Fractures in Time that I had to seal
It was The Fracture of the Past
It was a
gap made solid, is all I can describe
I crushed it to me, cryin, and as it exploded, I felt my heart swell
fresh tears poured from my eyes
but they were tears of love, friend, I aint ashamed ta say it
Joe, here
I had my love back, buddy, and it felt good
And then, in a deep corenr of the Void, I found two more Fractures in Time
the Present, spinning and cracking, splintering, and the Future, broiling away into the ether
I had to seal them
there were Echoes of the Kyrdosi screaming all over the place, they wanted me ta stop, but I had Love in my heart, an I was Invulnerable. I cast them aside, and sealed those rifts up, buddy, cryin as I did so
the Fracture of the Present, when it sealed, the energy released flooded back inta me, an I felt my thoughts bein unscrambled, I could
think again!
An the Fracture of the Future
ah, buddy, when that baby blew, I felt a wave of Hope like you never experienced! I felt the Echoes of the Kyrdosi dissipate, too
an then everythin sorta shimmered
an I was standin in Steel! An the Fractured Echo of me, the dude that started it all off, he was there
he thanked me
started ta fade, I grabbed him
an then I woke up. Heh, Molly was like hey, Scoop, ya promised me bagels! Go get me some coffee!
[This last mission was way cool, but I was a
little disappointed with some aspects. The Fractures themselves are described earlier as being larger than the ones Ive already seen, but theyre nictus crystals again. Is there maybe a larger object you could use? The system messages for the three Fractures Only the Fracture of the Present mentions its aspect, Mind. The other two dont mention Love or Hope. Also, the guards of the Fractures dont say anything. Id have liked to see some of your wonderful dialogue here to make the fights more climactic. And- the final ending on the streets of Steel well, you saw what Scoop thought of that. Comics are not averse to having characters that travel in various dreamlands etc. The And then he woke up and it was all a dream ending may well be abhorred by some on these boards, but here, I absolutely think that it could work. My point is that your story here isnt just a dream it happens to the character, even if it doesnt happen in the real world so to speak. One thing I intitially had a small issue with was that I wasnt sure where exactly Scoop was supposed to be during the briefings etc; once I decided that he was asleep and in a strange otherworldly state, those issues went away. I think that you could possibly imply this is happening more, in fact.
OK, Im waffling now, so enough with the suggestions. I loved this arc. The first time I ran it, I was stealthing, and totally failed to play it as it should be. This time round I took it slowly and savored the stark poetic dialogue and the atmosphere. I wish more arcs were like this. The writing in the bios, dialogue, clues, it was excellent. Well done. 5 Stars.
Ah, buddy
was it real?
Did I save the Universe last night?
In my sleep?
Whassat?
hahaha
yeah, we
are still here, aint we?
sure, Ill drink ta that!
Eco
Has anyone done any datamining of that?