Burning_Brawler_NA

"Since you were such a great aid in the fight," said Blade with a sneer, "It is your task to return them while I check the others' progress."

He cast a glare at Asuka before holding the gem a little more closely than seemed normal considering it was supposed to be given to the agency as he walked over to a corner.

------------------

Void Brawler's receiver was turned off as he waved at the MAGI liason.

"Can I help you?" he asked.

"Actually," said Void, turning around and shutting the double doors. "Yeah.

He leapt at the man, downing him, and quickly knocking him out.

He walked over to the vault, and pulled out the sheet of paper with the code.

He keyed it in and watched the door swing open.

"Too easy," he said, fading into the shadows and stepping inside.

Alarms blared, and he cursed.

[ QUOTE ]
Haha, Moonscribe may well betray Acid, Toy and company and go back to Blightlord if it seems like a good idea. . . but it probably won't since I bet Blightlord would kill him.

[/ QUOTE ]

Technically he only fought Netherak, never killed someone he actually cares about, so he might bring him back in.

And you're all lying! Plotting against me I say!

*puts on tinfoil hat and runs around the room screaming*

Ms. Liberty cried out, staggering as she moved away from Shinji.

Ruby struck again from the shadows, slashing across her leg and bowing her.

She was utterly defenseless of the pommel came down on her head.

He quickly took the potion out of his pocket and drained it into the heroine's mouth.

He massaged her throat forcing the liquid down, before removing the pendant from her neck.

"Yes..."

*waits for the Maltan squad to return the favor and help his city*

We've had maybe four new people during this fight. It adds to the fun, except Blightlord is going to need help. @_@

So far of the new group. only Mech's sided with him and hasn't betrayed him.

[ QUOTE ]
Heh, to tell you the truth, I'd love to come back, but I really don't think my schedule these days would allow me to post very well. Plus, I have no idea what Billyboy I would use concerning timeline. I took it that the thread was staged after SH101 before, because Toy and Billyboy had met in the summer of 2006 (Brass Monday was staged after the school year and oddly enough directly on my birthday, and thus Billyboy's 17th birthday, while he's 16 in SH101). But I'm really not sure how it fits in anymore!

[/ QUOTE ]

Well, considering the way the left, it would just be a matter of The Entity saying, 'You didn't think I'd let you leave that easily?' and throwing them back into the contest.

Er... really? Cause the only reason I did that was cause I thought you still had more armies and didn't want to leave something defenseless. O.o

Like I said, Blightlord's personality is to feel superior to everyone. Consider it an exploitable character flaw in him.

As for the zomg armies! bit... Well, when he raised his first army in Final Fight, I was a bit of a forum noob... I thought it would be cool, since I didn't expect many people, and I could set a sort of goal: Crush the army, working together.

Then Devious joined and he also had an army, which trounced mine, so I brought in the Pocket Dimension Blightlord owns and recreated troops there when Acid could detect any people I killed and re-raised.

Basically, it started out as my fault, and grew bigger as others went along with it.

I think it makes Final Fight different enough from Cosmic Chess so that it's harder to post something meant for the other thread.

Also, notice Blightlord really hasn't used any armies in the other thread. I didn't say raised, but he's not using any

Cosmic Chess I plan to keep him to the normal MM limit and just spruce of the zombies, in Anti-Hero he's not fighting anyone to begin with, but he only has the personal guards, Grime, and the zombies he's going to use for class experiments.

In Crown of Thorns, he's only using the basic MM amount.

Well now I have to critique Leo...

I can definitely see the transition on Ian's personality as he gets older, and that's a good thing, cause I know hearing his every thought makes it hard for Pstorm not to shock him.

Also, how you can keep Hyun-Ki passive pretty much no matter what shows commitment to a personality style. Blightlord's self-developed to someone more easily angered, though whether that's a bad thing, I don't think so.

I'm gonna have to critique others before I get critiqued back huh? *winces* I'm no good at this... >.>

Okay where to start...

Billyboy: I like your characters. The Phillisbots crack me up, and Billyboy himself, it was easy to tell the type of person he was from the start. It's a good thing, considering the type of personality he has.

Essex: I can never seem to be rude to Essex in the threads without proofreading my post. Even Blightlord was slightly polite way in the beginning. The only character I have that I could ever imagine trying to kill her with would be Ruby.

As for Rosalind, she's always fun to read, and I look forward to when she's in Blightlord's class.

Soviet: Even if they seem two-dimensional, I still think the Trolls are some of the funniest characters on this board. The Trollspeak just makes it all work.

The only thing is, after everything Reikoff's lost, how have the leading Maltans not executed him yet?

Devious: Hmm... In the beginning, when you were first in Final Fight, it was interesting. Although technically nuking the Graveyard like you did was sort of powerposting, it all made sense. Now that you've toned down on that a bit, I have really no complaints, other than an inability to make sure I killed the right Acid, and not a clone.

And your descriptions are awesome as well. Like I've admitted, I know my descriptions could use work, and I have trouble determining if I'm going too far into detail and it's ruining the dialogue or slowing down the type of pace I like to generate in certain kinds of posts.

Hallucinogen: Schizo is great. And you do an awesome job of not going over the top with his powers, considering he's pure madness. He's also fun to read, like with the spider bit.

Hallucinogen may not seem like he's doing much in SH 101, but the other threads he has a pretty interesting personality, like with him and Essex.

I haven't seen your others chars enough to say much about them.

I'll try to critique others later...

*takes out baseball bat and pwns Hermod*

Really, I can't think of much. You're characters seem pretty well developed, and I haven't been in any of your story arcs.

And I feel bad for you. That thread is over 140 pages in Word....

[ QUOTE ]


Burning, my main complain is I don't know enough about your characters. They're all a mystery to me.



[/ QUOTE ]

*points down to the first link in his sig*

Easiest way without going through 400 pages looking for some revelations from Final Fight.

As for why the amulet in 24 Hour Virus bothers Pstorm, no one knows why except me

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Starts chanting.

"One of us... One of us... "

[/ QUOTE ]

Well, and that's from Burning! I'm going to consider that an invitation to FF. *grins evily*

[ QUOTE ]
So, we have one opinion on Blightlord, any others?


[/ QUOTE ]

I haven't seen enough of him to judge, but I'll keep an eye out if you like.

[/ QUOTE ]

Oh, you'll see plenty of him in Final Fight, friend or foe

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[ QUOTE ]

Halo - You have the one of the quirkiest characters I've come across lately... and she sometimes can make me smile and shake my head on some "Silly rabbit..." type stuff. You have a consistency about her thats almost uncanny... even with this twisting personality of lost and found identity. I wouldn't have the patience for her and her child-like innocence at times annoys the crap outta me, but thats what I get from it. Its a good character with a steady foundation...


[/ QUOTE ]

Thanks Cuppaajin,

Looking for opinions on:

Shane/Meagan SH101
Ella*/Belize AV101 *more on Ella. Her craziness makes her the most fun to write sometimes, though she can be a pain, and her different sides very strange to an outsider viewpoint

Kia/Hali, FF They havent been in long but I am having fun writting the two opposite personalities. Is it hard to understand Hali? When I write her she has a french accent in my head, I am not sure if that is clear in my writting yet.

[/ QUOTE ]

I have to write a French accent when 'borrowing' Harlequin from an SG mate. I always have trouble determining if what I'n typing is a French accent, or something like Victor Krum from Harry Potter...

I find Ella funny, especially whenever she learns a 'new word.'

Starts chanting.

"One of us... One of us... "

So, we have one opinion on Blightlord, any others?

I normally like critiques on my character's themselves. Torcher and Pyra are a bit more difficult to do in a way, because the only way they really seem to work out, is when they're talking to each other. Torcher could care less about everyone else, and Pyra tries to make one or two friends, but isn't much on following through with it.

She easily caught his backhand with one fist, then grabbed his leg with the other, and twisted them, forcing Shinji into an embarassingly vulnerable position.

She began to slowly pull up on his leg and down on his arm, bending him backforward, when Blade struck again.

She leapt to the side, but her neck was still grazed.

He came at a slash down on her head, and she moved to catch the sword as it came down.

Ms. Liberty cried out, backing up, the skin on her hands sliced. She wouldn't be grabbing or throwing any more punches for a while...

[ QUOTE ]
4. Please keep all criticism CONSTRUCTIVE unless otherwise asked by the person who wants their style/characters/whatever critiqued. Remember, this is a place for feedback and suggestions, not "I don't like you!"


[/ QUOTE ]

That pointed at, if Blightlord really bothers you that much Laz, what should I do to fix that, except maybe a full reconstructing of his entire personality and maybe Bio so it makes sense?

Oh, and I know I have really bad issues with being descriptive. I just feel the same way Hal said. If I throw in too many details, it kind of loses some impact on 'what did Blightlord find?'.

And... well, his personality... it's... he doesn't like to be talked down to, and he's the kind to put in traps wherever he stays, in case of a 'real' emergency.

Now, I apologize if my character's personality makes him come off as an [censored], but really, since he is, I don't know why I should apologize.

Sorry... bad timing is all.

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Ah, here's something I had been wondering.

My favorite thing to do is scenes like this:

[ QUOTE ]
Blightlord opened the gym doors, Grime and two Grave Knights behind him.

He walked across the room, and straight into Mr. Big's office without even knocking.

"Whadda you want?" he asked, nose curled in disgust.

"I want you to give the children a specific excercise, one to prepare them for a field trip they will be taking," Blightlord calmly responded.

"Pft. I got my own lesson plans for makin' the brats miserable, so beat it."

"I think you may want to reconsider," he responded, tossing a file onto Mr. Big's desk.

The short man cleared away the wrappers and crumpled papers all over his desk as he opened the folder.

"Why the hell should I care what-" he stopped, and what wasn't covered by his mask turned deathly pale. "How... how did you get this?"

"I have my sources. Now, I believe we were discussing how you would be conducting your gym class tomorrow..."


[/ QUOTE ]

If I don't do something along these lines once in a while, I swear my head'll explode. So, what do you think of 'em? Could they use work? Do they need to be more... villainy?



[/ QUOTE ]

Other than that it hastens along to the point where Montressor will throw Blightlord off the island? I honestly do regret letting you bring him in as a teacher. My fault for not researching the character before making the decision.

It's nothing personal, everyone has a character that some people just plain wish didn't exist, that makes them groan whenever he/she/it shows up in a thread. Happens to us all.

[/ QUOTE ]

Erm.... ow? Duely noted?

((Ok, this is just a place for us to write our character's backgrounds, leading up to when they escape the Zig. If we wanna make another thread after that, we could wait til after we start an SG and title it that or something.))

A man lay strapped to a table.

"You can't do this!" he shouted. "I have a wife and kids!"

"Nonsense, you're hallucinating, now be quiet and take the serum like a good test subject," said a man wearing a large helmet and lab coat.

"You can't... do... this..." The man on the table drifted asleep.

He was standing alone, a spotlight on him in the darkness.

Suddenly, a small creature ran to him. He recognized it! It was one of those 'Wailers' from the Rogue Isles!

It reached out a small arm, and the man grasped it.

It led him to a group of its fellows, when he noticed his clothes had disappeared. But it was alright. There were... plants... they were all over him!

He tried to pull of one of the leaves growing from his arm, and hissed at the sudden pain.

The Wailer patted his arm comfortingly, singing, "Everything is ah-alright. I'll be the one to tuck you in at night, and if you, follow me, I can guarantee you won't, find nobody, else, like, me. "

The strange song comforted him as he walked among the small demons. They were frightening but... reassuring at the same time.

Suddenly one spoke out in a garbled voice. The others laughed and pointed at him, mocking him.

The man looked around in confusion, and anger. One threw a rock at him, and the others joined in. Pelting him, hurting him.

He cried out, "STOP!"

But that wasn't what he heard.

He heard the same noise the one demon had made. Without knowing it, he had spoken in their language.

The Wailer guiding him quickly pulled the man away from the others. "Just stop your crying, it will be alright. Just take my hand. Hold it tight. I will protect you from, all around you. I will be here, don't you cry. "

He nodded, following the demon.

A large palace came into view, and before the man knew it, he was standing before the largest Wailer he had ever seen.

It spoke in the same garbled language... but he understood.

"You are a special one. One truly fit to be like us, one of us."

The man's eyes widened. One of them? A Wailer?

"I- I'd do anything to be like you!"

"What do you mean? You are already one of us."

The man felt a melodic tune in the back of his mind. It told him it was true. He was a Wailer.

He awoke in a smoke-filled lab, and looked down at his leafy arms and legs. He touched a hand to his hair, feeling the leaves.

Sharp, red spikes had grown onto his shoulders. He looked at a pair of sunglasses lying on a table, and leapt off of the chair to put them on. He grinned and turned as heroes ran towards him.

"Are you alright?" said one.

"Oh my God... look what that freak did to him," said a woman.

The man looked around in confusion.

There was a loud crash as a mech crashed through the walls.

The scientist from before sat in the pilot's seat, and let loose a barrage of missiles.

They struck the woman, sending her flying back. "Darla!" yelled the other hero, rushing back to help her.

The man felt a sudden rage... hatred even... for the scientist.

Thorns erupted from his body, and he quickly threw them at the mech, hitting a joint on its leg that sent it stumbling to the side.

It toppled over into a pile of barrels with a flame on them. For some reason, the man couldn't look away.

Suddenly, fire leapt from his hands, and the barrels caught fire.

There was a brilliant explosion before everything went black.

***

"Hello? Wake up.. come on. Up!"

The man shook his head as things came back into view. He saw he was in a hospital, and the hero from before was standing over him.

The woman was there to... but something was wrong. Tears were streaming down her face... then he realized what it was.

She was missing an arm.

"I-I saw what you did back there," said the man. "How... how you tried to help. I've had a talk with The Silver Str-"

"Madison," she said, her voice nearly a whisper.

The man nodded uncomfortably. "Madison... She... won't be able to do hero work for... for a long time. This may seem... sudden but... you have a gift. You could use your powers to help people. I could help train you. Would you be interested?"

The man's mouth opened wide. Him? A hero? It was too good to be true! This was fantastic!

Well, true the lady lost her arm, but what did he care? She didn't matter anymore, he was the one who would be fighting crime!

He grinned and nodded, shaking the hero's offered hand, when he felt something odd.

He looked behind him to see a tail swaying lightly. HIS tail!

"I need a name to call you, though," said the hero. "Weird plant dude won't work."

"Wailer!" he enthusiastically said.

"Er... no. Not your hero name. I mean you're real name."

"Wailer!" he insisted. "It's so much who I am, it's part of my naaaaaaame!"

"Errr... right. Well, the doctor's say you're free to go, so let's get you to the hero registration office."

A few hours later, he was finishing signing papers. The hero, who Wailer found out was called 'Fire-Born', decided to choose his hero name for him.

"That fire, and the thorns... how about... 'The Flaming Thorn'?"

Wailer nodded excitedly, and the woman at the registration desk raised an eyebrow before sighing and entering in the last bit of information.

"Alright, you're all set." She handed him a hero license.

Fire-Born smiled and led Wailer out. "Alright, let's start on the basics." He pointed at a Hellion who was leaning against a wall, whistling at girls as they passed by. "That one's crime is being an annoying jack-[censored]. We're taking him out."

Wailer nodded and ran up to the Hellion. The gangster took one look at him and said, "Newb," before turning to another passing woman and barking.

Wailer placed his hands on the man's face. "Hey, what the [censored] do you think you-"

He was silenced as thorns erupted from Wailer's hand into his skull.

The Hellion slumped to the ground, and he enthusiastically set the corpse on fire.

"NO! Nononononononono!" shouted Fire-Born, running across the street. "What were you thinking?! You were supposed to arrest him!"

Wailer ignored him, seeing a woman struggling to keep her purse. He had to help her!

He quickly threw a long burst of fire that wrapped around the Hellions, before covering their entire bodies, consuming them in a flash of flame.

He grinned and clapped maliciously as the woman ran up to him.

"Thank you! I know I shouldn't be... but I'm worried about those two... they were just teleported to prison, right?"

Wailer laughed and patted her on the back, each pat sending several thorns into her spine.

Her mouth was open in shock as she slumped to the ground.

"Oops..."

Fire-Born was on him in an instant. He was struck with a flaming fist, then everything went black.

He awoke in a cell. He glared childishly at the door barring his freedom, and tried to set it on fire, but nothing happened.

He sat on the bed, head in his hands. All he wanted was to be a hero...

"I'm limited... Just look at me. I'm liiiimited." He reached out his arms to an invisible Wailer. "And just look at you, you can do all I, couldn't do..."

He bowed his head as he stood, pacing about the room. "No, good, deed, goes unpunished. No act of charity goes uuuunresented. No, good, deed, goes unpunished. That's my new creeeeeed! My road of good intentions led where such roads awaiting. No good deeeeeed, goes unpunished!!!"

By now the inmates were booing and hissing, and yelling for the man to shut up. He ran to the door and gripped the bars.

"One question haunts and hurts, too much, too much to mention. Was I really seeking good? Or just seeking attention... Is that all good deeds are when looked at with an ice cold eye? If that's all good deeds are, maybe that's, the reason whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy, no good deed goes unpunished! All helpful urges should be circumvented! No good deed goes unpunished, sure I meant well, well look at what well meant did! All right enough! So be it! So be it then... Let all be agreed... I'm wicked through and through since-"

Gas filled the room.

And he was out like a light.

When he awoke, the door was broken down, his freedom outside the walls.

He would destroy everyone! If they wanted to stop him from being a hero, then they'll have to take him down as a villain!

A half hour later, he was singing 'A Whole New World' in a helicopter bound for Mercy Island.

Another half hour after that, he was thrown out and forced to swim the rest of the way.

((Okay, the first song is by Uncle Cracker, called 'Follow Me.' The next is from Disney's Tarzan, called 'You'll Be In My Heart.' The third is a small piece of the song 'Wonderful' from Wicked. The last song, 'No Good Deed', is also from the musical Wicked.))

Ah, here's something I had been wondering.

My favorite thing to do is scenes like this:

[ QUOTE ]
Blightlord opened the gym doors, Grime and two Grave Knights behind him.

He walked across the room, and straight into Mr. Big's office without even knocking.

"Whadda you want?" he asked, nose curled in disgust.

"I want you to give the children a specific excercise, one to prepare them for a field trip they will be taking," Blightlord calmly responded.

"Pft. I got my own lesson plans for makin' the brats miserable, so beat it."

"I think you may want to reconsider," he responded, tossing a file onto Mr. Big's desk.

The short man cleared away the wrappers and crumpled papers all over his desk as he opened the folder.

"Why the hell should I care what-" he stopped, and what wasn't covered by his mask turned deathly pale. "How... how did you get this?"

"I have my sources. Now, I believe we were discussing how you would be conducting your gym class tomorrow..."


[/ QUOTE ]

If I don't do something along these lines once in a while, I swear my head'll explode. So, what do you think of 'em? Could they use work? Do they need to be more... villainy?

Another example I have is off of my SG's RP thread. The basic beginning is lately, Elitist has been acting more violent towards the rest of the Masters than they're willing to except. Techno Tyrant's neck was almost snapped in two, and Elitist tried to break every bone in Blightlord's body, prompting a fight that wasn't broken up til another one of the other villain's stepped in. We allow each other some auto-control to move an already crawling thread along, and only rarely have problems.

What happened after that, was this:

[ QUOTE ]
Blightlord looked up as the flyer left. He finished setting the sheet over a lump in a crate. He peeled it up to see the dead eyes of the moronic Smasher-Man staring up at him. "I cannot have Elitist learning of my newest concoctions."

Grime stepped forward and pointed at the crate. It disappeared in a flash of light to be teleported in the middle of the ocean, where it would sink to the bottom thanks to the weights placed on the bottom.

Blightlord chuckled as he gave a mock salute.

He turned and headed for his room. He checked walls out of the corner of his eye, making sure the security measures he had placed were still operational. If it truly came to him verse Elitist, it would be ended quickly, Blightlord was sure.

He opened the door and glared at the Grave Knights playing Poker in the corner. One flipped over in his chair and the other accidentally knocked over the bone chips.

Blightlord shook his head and grabbed a vial. The blue liquid gave off an eery purple glow. He pulled a jar off of one of the many shelves and and removed the lid, taking out a mouse. It happily bounced around the desk, its freedom from the jar a dream come true to the critter.

Blightlord poured a drop of the liquid onto it, and it violently exploded.

After wiping away pieces of its insides in mild disgust, the villain stared at the bottle. "Not what I intended, but it seems I may have a use for this."

----------------------

"Your love of alchemy and chemicals amuses me, Blightlord." said a voice from the doorway. Techno Tyrant was leaning on the door post examining a small scratch on his armor. One of the graveknights lept to it's feet and charged Tyrant.

Tyrant held up two fingers and pointed them at the undead monster. In almost that exact second, the zombie hit the ground, surging and seizuring with electricity. Two blinking red darts remained in his neck.

"You really should get a leash or two for these things, impulsively acting like monsters and what not." scoffed Tyrant.

"You have 5 seconds to explain why you are interrupting me before you become the next mouse I experiment on." said Blightlord with an edge to his voice.
Tyrant shut the door behind him and locked it. He then looked up the security camera in the corner. Raising one hand, the camera turned and faced the wall.

"Now what I say in this sound proofed room will not leave this sound proofed room. I don't trust you, but you are not stupid either. I'm sure you are not pleased with the way Elitist embarassed you in front of the entire group. He took someone as powerful and as feared as you and made you into his....well I don't need to indulge on your public humiliation. Elitist is right about one thing, you could defeat him and he is only human. But he could rip you limb from rotting limb. I never agreed on having him run the show around here in the first place. With your control of the undead and your knowledge of poison and my control of machines and the base's security....well I'm not suggesting mutiny or an overthrow. In fact, more of a.....a demonstration. Those such as Smashing Pumpkin, Knave, and Harley are smart enough not to interfere, even if they have sworn loyalty to Elitist. You will know when to act when the time arises, I'm sure of it. Like I said, you are not stupid. That is all."

And with that, Tyrant left Blightlord. It is true though, Techno Tyrant did not trust the treacherous Blightlord. If the situation did arise and Blightlord did turn in Tyrant to Elitist, then Tyrant would have no choice but to unleash a massacre that could potentially wipe out the entire force known as the Masters of Mayhem. But there were more important things at hand.

Tyrant walked to the hangar, not really caring that he was not assigned to heading to Paragon City. But Tyrant did enjoy watching a good fight. He clicked a few buttons on his wrist computer. The hangar bay doors above him slowly opened. His boots began to glow and hum. And in an instant, Tyrant shot into the sky, jet powered rockets propelling him towards Paragon City.

------------------------

Blightlord shook his head, wondering if Tyrant understood the dangerous game he intended to play.

He examined the blue liquid, and ushered a lesser zombie to him.

He handed the vial to Grime, who understood.

He poured a single drop on it, and the zombie's head exploded same as the mouse.

"My lord, what form of ingredients did you need to create such a liquid?" asked the Lich, staring at the vial in amazement.

"Unfortunately, I do not know, Grime," said Blightlord, taking the vial and draining it into a series of tubes. "But I intend to find out..."

***

The Ruby Blade silently exited Blightlord's room. He cared little what happened to Elitist, but was deciding how much such information would be worth to the brutish man.

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Any new critiques for me? Or repetitions of old ones I still need work on?

"If you won't just answer..." She did a quick spin-kick to hid head, followed up by a palm strike to his stomach.

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((. . . Oh my.

. . . My condolences. . .

. . . I'm afraid I never know what to say to things like this. . . sorry. . .))

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((Same ))

((Oh my god, Plague, I'm so sorry. ))