Want to meet new, exciting people...AND KILL THEM!


Ex_Libris

 

Posted

Name: Astro Creep
Height: 6' 8"
Weight: 320 lbs
Turn ons: Earth girls, blood, brain matter
Turn offs: Fat chicks, those zombie things that puke all over my best boots.
Hobbies: Beating people up, saving chicks and getting their phone numbers, "finding" stuff, throwing things at people, trying to start World War III, looking for visible panty lines on every female superhero I meet.
Favorite hot spots in Paragon City: Uhhh well I like to hang around at train stations and take a leak in the corner. Just markin my territory. And then I also hang around at the Paragon City Police department. Just spent the weekend there in detox, in fact.
Ideal first date: A stroll through King's Row, beating Skulls within an inch of their lives.

Okay ladies, I'm kinda new to this here planet and I'm lookin to meet some new people. I'll be upfront and say that I got a criminal history on my homeworld, I was supposed to be executed for war grimes or genocide or somethin like that - I dunno, I'd ask my lawyer but I ripped his lungs out for overchargin' me. Luckily, my prison transport crashed here on Earth, so now I got a new home.

But the women of this scumbucket planet are the ones that have really lucked out. Not only is Astro Creep the ultimate solider, and the greatest warrior in the universe - I'm also the best male specimen you'll ever find. Not just compared to these normal wimpy earth men, but even those freaks that run around in their underwear can't compare to Astro Creep.

So if you're ever on Protector and wanna meet the greatest thing the universe has ever puked up, look for Astro Creep. I also kill people/things if you ask me nicely, pay me, or show me your honkers.

Astro Creep out.