ridiculous_girl

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Your last av made me have to eat five Breakfrees to even touch it, despite the helpers you provided. You MAY want to loosen it down a bit, it's a SHARP spike in difficulty compared to the rest of the arc, i had to die to get out and get inspirations. Otherwise, very trippy and cool
Left feedback ^_^

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actually i did loosehn hnim up already. i dropped hnim dowhn from extreme /dark armor to hnard. thne rez at thne ehnd was a progblem. gbut withn your scrapper, you are usually hnot very resistahnt to psychnic stuff...

thnahnks for ruhnhnihngb thnis fihnally... i will ruhn your hnewest ohne soohn. thnehn maygbe you cahn ruhn my dohnut world ohne. i hneed feedgback ohn thne comgbat of thne mihniohns...

left my text uhneditted just for you... ;p

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Running arcs now! O_O


Also my newest and final arc ish up o.o!


Arc Name: Fate & Destiny
Arc ID: 140129
Faction:Heroic
Creator Global/Forum Name: @cap'tain Amazing / CaptainAmazing
Difficulty Level: solo friendly
Synopsis: A mender asks for our help in correcting a one-dimensional time distortion with Portal Crop’s help. Attempts to tie into game canon. (1 AV, but help is added at intervals to assist.)
Estimated Time to Play: under 30 minutes solo
Link to More Details or Feedback: Patch Notes / Feedback can be found at this Link

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ah, i see... this is why you are taking so long doing one of my arcs....

when i get a chance i will go through it...

will do venture, still awaiting mine in your thread.

i need more arcs to review since i am running low again and trolling the boards again. please, give me more. NOW!

same as before though, you run mine and i run yours... fair's fair...

i figured those were probably artifacts from revisions. you need to do what i do... pester a friend incessantly until they go through your arc with a fine tooth comb and find all the typos and bad sentences.

here are the typos i found...

1st mission
in the jimmy rescue dialogue, the "I'll" is not capitalized

in the stranded text jimmy says "wont" and not "won’t"

found text it says "its" and not "it's"

in the radiologist description is say "companies", shouldn’t it be "company’s"?

2hnd mission
the contact say he is a small cog in a large wheel... i think you mixing your things a little, small cog in a large machine or a spoke in a large wheel.

why one of he crates? odd choice...

no comment about the new villain group? nothing? seems kind of a glaring omission unless i missed it.

3rd mission
in the clue i think it would be AH has been using...

hostage rescue text says "thankyou thankyou" and they "had my family..." does this mean his family is free?

in the phil clue after all is two words...

the wont in the last sentence of the clue is missing its '...

contact finally mentions the villains one mission too late. granted he was there...

4th mission
in the text for the computer glowy it mentions the atomic anatomy... who?
clue research paper 1 it should be contact’s

captive harry says worried about our mum... maybe my mum?

final patient x text it says "thankyou"

5th mission
mission send off brief. final sentence probably should end in a ? since it is a rhetorical question...

stop atomic anatomy? who is atomic anatomy?

in rescue text for nurse bradshaw bloodshed is misspelled

ok this is a very good story arc. i ran this with level 33 A/dev blaster on heroic. i like the classic new partner dialogue and contact background. i liked the custom toons also, not too difficult and not too easy. one problem that would help make this a really good arc from a pretty good arc is that it needs to be edited and cleaned up. i have listed all the typos that i saw, and i was pretty thorough. but you have a lot of run on sentences and punctuation problems. you need someone to go through and scrub it all the way through. otherwise it is a good story with the potential for being a great story. i would give it a 3.5 if i could but i gave it 4 stars. when it is cleaned up and fully edited it may deserve more.

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Feedback from a high 40s spine/regen scrapper. (Because I want to get Mission Engineer legit, dangitall.) She's a plant person from another dimension.

If you want to return the favor, arcs are in my sig. Didn't want to dump this into the thread.

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thank you for your running commentary. i was* a bit worried at first, i thought it was a rant, but it was* great.

i am sorry about the therapist spawning on the last floor of the hospital, at all times he is* supposed to spawn in the front as* do the allies, that he triggers. but that map is* buggy and sometimes* he goes* to the back. i have not figured out a way around. i will look at it again and mess with it and see if i can make it work another way.
the ambushes* are linked to random events, but not secret shame. i am still not sure how, but they do siphon sometimes* before they get to you, which makes* them even more evil/cooler than usual.


if you really want the closing dialogue i can email it to you. it is just a debrief of all the events.

first time i heard about the souvenir thing. i will ask around and find out if that has* happened to others and bug report it. you get a certificate to hang next to your "i survived outbreak and all i got was this* stupid t-shirt" t-shirt.

i will most certainly run your arc. it makes* my list for the day. trying to get the engineer badge too....

136959 The Lost Choir: Part Two: The New Testament

in the intro brief for the first mission... how do you know it has been three days? maybe time has passed, but you do not know how much...

in alpha day clue it says "wh an audible sigh..."

nice touch with the radio...

3rd mission
after destroying the font the NPCs said "$name just took down the font..." i have had this problem before my self. not sure if it is a bug or not

in the fire of X clue you have the tentacles write, do you mean writhe?

in the ring clue the sentence that begins with "seems" is not capitalized.

i love that mission map! i have never seen it before. what is it?

4th mission
in the sarcophagus description...the word "state" is capitalized

the clue after releasing thellos assumes that you found your ally, which i had not. i missed him somewhere. maybe, though it might not make much sense, is to have him be the trigger. not sure if it is really that feasible thematically

got stuck in mission, it would not let me out. i could not exit. not sure why? had to file a bug/stuck report. i did not what to run the entire mission again... i am stuck in the same mission a second time. has this happened to you? the first time i got the captive and i got thellos, out of order, and went all the way back to the entrance. when i clicked on the door it told me "you cannot enter." of course i was already inside. i sent a report and left for 1.5 hours. no response. so i quit and restarted the mission. ran thorugh it again, but in the right order, but i again could not exit. a GM finally showed up but i was AFK and did not see them. i guess i will have to quit again. but i am not sure i want to run it a third time and not be able to leave. have you had this and do you know of any solution? is there a trick to leaving this mission?

i guess since i am stuck i will post this and wait until tomorrow and try again. i will post the last mission and the final arc together.

oh, i thought i put my name down in here.. if you could review my hero therapy arc, #119228, i will try to run yours very soon. click the link below for more info. thank you.

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Arc Name: The Lost Choir: Chapter One: The Old Testament.
Arc ID: 123675
Factions: Tuatha, Rikti, Rularuu, Custom group.
Creator Global/Forum Name: @MrSquid
Difficulty Level: Moderate. Contains 2 AV's, but a fair amount of help for them too
Synopsis: This is essentially a combination of Christian Mythos and the classic "cosmic horror" story. The first part is probably the most slow paced, with a lot of unanswered questions.
Level Range: Intended for 45+, but you could get away with 30 plus


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arc# 123675 The Lost Choir: Chapter One: The Old Testament

oops, now i read the lvl +45 extra...

1st mission
first clue aggressive is spelled wrong

the animation for the rescued workers is a bit weird, does not work properly. they stay in place too, maybe run away?

technical quibble, wicca is a form of spiritualism/paganism. you might be more accurate in animism or primitive paganism. kind of like calling polytheists hindus. not all polytheists are hindu, but the hindus are polytheists. (henotheists to be more accurate). all wiccans are pagans, but not all pagans are wiccan.

2nd mission
maybe the rikti are doing experiments with the divine rather than on the divine?

3rd mission
"split off of..". maybe split off from?

oops the rescue high priest is not passive. did you mean that? this means he can die in mission... which he did and mission failed. therefore i did not have to fight the main boss, which the sergeants aggroed before i was ready... i think that needs to be fixed, unless that is what you intended. might be better just to make him non combat and let it progress that way. though i did like the unexpected end, i was wondering what would happen if a mission failed. i guess you did mean that. maybe i like that touch...

4th mission
should it not be Choir, and not choir in the mission brief? not sure if it was capitalized before...

it should say "he did not say much more than that..." in the brief

is it The Vanguard? or the Vanguard? in the send-off.

the final mission. the EGB/AV was too difficult for me. i had to bring in a ringer.

ok. this is a very, very good arc, i am interested in seeing how the rest of it goes. i ran through with my level 30 AR/dev blaster on heroic. not too much too much trouble. the story is very good. i like the custom toons. this very well written and i appreciate that. it does leave off as a kind of cliff hanger. i was so glad to get past that AV, that i did not see if there was a clue. i died about 5 times using a variety of methods to get it. i would try to pull it into the leftover vanguard, that would not work since he would constantly run. i could hardly make a dent, because i would hit it with the snipe and then it would run and generally heal up. it took about 45 minutes just fighting him before i gave up and nearly ragequit. not sure what i could offer as advice. maybe a change of maps where you can insert allies?

this took about 2.5 hours, or more. i will get to the others later today.

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Why, thank you very much! I have changed quite a few things due to feedback, and I really think it IS sharpening it up some. Still little bits to deal with, but I always consider it an ongoing process. I'm glad you enjoyed it!

**now feels guilty and runs off to do your arc like I promised**

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hahahaha! not a problem. it was a fun arc to play. do you have any more?

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Currently I don't have any other Arcs. Just a couple single shot missions.

So other than the unmutual sense of humor how was the mission? Too difficult, too easy, about right?

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the first time i ran your arc on a "gimped" level 36 TA/archery defender. i say gimped because she is in that awkward level where everything is yellow, and slot are empty, because she is waiting for the next level to do a partial upgrade. i do not know what i was thinking, but i ran it on rugged. which was not a problem, but when i got to the final boss of the first mission, he was* being troublesome, so i quit and went to my level 29 MA/SR scrapper. then i ran through on heroic and it was fine, i even considered bumping it up to rugged, for more challenge. the final boss slowed me down of course.

i think i will give it another run today. let me run someone else’s first and then i will run through with a different toon.

otherwise, it was very playable.

it is in my queue of missions for tomorrow...

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If you don't get the humor you don't get it. Not everybody thinks the same way. Personally I would rather gouge my eyes out with a dull spork than watch a movie featuring Will Farrell who is the singularly least funny person on the planet. However for some inexplicable reason some people like him.
Hopefully you actually read the clues and descriptions since the majority of the jokes can be found in those.

And try as I might I can find nowhere that it's spelled Stakesman. I'll run the missions to see if it shows up there.

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i think it was in the description of the final boss.

yeah, i hear you on differences in humor. believe me when i say a lot of my jokes fall flat because i am too obscure sometimes... my cannibal jokes sometimes do not go over very well in mixed company. i did read all the clues and descriptions, i reread all the dialogue for typos too. so it must be me...

oh well, i am willing to give another arc a try if you wish...

sounds great. i am glad to help. maybe i will give it another run sometime soon.

Arc Name: The Devs must die!
Arc ID: 113956

the first question is... why would i help nemesis? granted i am a hero, but he is a bad guy. maybe this is more of a villain oriented story...

1st mission
the nav bar says "get clue., hobobot mark I" maybe capitalize the mark too?

the collect object did not have a loading bar...

2nd mission
in the second mission maybe keep it just find the arbiter? kind of blows the joke.

the nav board says "1 a portfolio, 1 a notebook..." etc...

in the 3rd mission you have two different spellings of steaksman. it is stakesman here.


ok, i like the custom group. they were interesting, i especially liked the old bag lady.

truthfully, i did not understand your mission that much. the jokes did not make sense to me hand i was confused agbout the storyline. i am not sure what you are trying to do. i am definitely sure that this mission should be villainous. it does not make much sense to gibe hero, nor neutral either. i do not know what to give you in feedback, because i am really at a loss as to what the story was about. i missed the joke... *shrugs shoulders*

i am discouraged, mandu. i wish i could offer more. do you have any suggestions?

Laugh? I Thought I'd DIE! Arc #68429

a couple of small things...

the brief it say the PPD have someone "on the lookout" for me? who? the PPD? kind of awkward sentence...

brief for 3rd mission after the secretary's name there is an extra comma.

ok this is a really good arc. i enjoyed it immensely. sometimes i will just run through one to see what they do and skip to the critical junctures. but i love your custom toons, they were fun to fight. they look great and i like their powers combos. this would be a great arc to run with a large team. it is possible that the descriptions give away too much, but that is me since i like mystery on first contact with an unknown enemy. that is something very rare. not quite sure what it was, but they were very definitely interesting.

i took your arc with my level 30 blaster, AR/dev, and there not much trouble. i love the little ambush, took me by complete surprise but it fit beautifully into the story.

this arc looks cleaned up and well edited. it was fun to play and i thought maps were well chosen too. they is not much i can say in criticism, i can only praise it. nice job.

this arc gets the Ridiculous Seal of Approval! (TM)

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If you have the time, I'd appreciate a review of any one of my arcs listed in my sig. Probably "Why Do Bad Girls Like Bad Boys?" would be best, as I'm trying to get more feedback in order to improve it.

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Arc# 63910 "Why Do Bad Girls Like Bad Boys?"

i like this arc, but...

the first mission has some good dialogue. but i saw one battle with dialogue, and the final boss. otherwise it seemed a bit empty for such a large map. you could sprinkle it with more battles maybe even a knives/ carnie hostage or two with more dialogue.

same with the second mission, one patrol with dialogue and the boss with dialogue. there is so much more you can add to this arc to make it funny and interesting.

again same with the third arc. lots of empty space that asks to be filled.

why are the knives of artemis bosses quantum?

your choice of animations do not make much sense either, with anythning.

ok, this arc has a lot of potential. but as it stands right now it has a lot of empty space. there is so much more that you can add to this to make it more interesting. right now, there is not much motivation or incentive to do much more than hit the bosses and go to the next mission.

another common problem that i encounter is original justification. i am not really sure you have it. why do we go to him in the first place? are we undercover? that is a pet peeve for some people, why are we playing dumb and letting him make us do his dirty work. i do not think this is especially laid out?

i do like your choice maps and they tie well with the story. i know you have a lot of room, since you only have one custom toon in this whole arc. you need to add more to this to make it more interesting. you have the minimum going, with a potentially decent story waiting. it is a good start, but i would not call it finished.

it probably did not help things to be cloaked and have scaredy cat allies with the fire. it would be much easier with a tank in full view. yeah not much i can suggest, other than what i already did... hone thing that i did was my bosses went from LT in the first mission, to boss in the second, to AV by the fourth. they did appear to be getting better quality, narrativewise, why not harder?

again, i have said this to other people, you have to decide who your audience is and what you are trying to do. is this going to be team material as well solo friendly? the blaster that i used is moderately squishy, yeah oxymoron, and a good tester. it was a good soloable arc, until that point. or is this better as a team oriented arc. it is a pickle to say the least... because a majority of your players will probably be solo players. i have been tempted to run a couple of mine with one of my mid 20s defenders, just to see what it comes to. but i am trying to reach as many as possible, both team and solo. though theme wise, the hero therapy makes sense solo.

thank you mandu.
i think the glowy things in that map are a little much too, but i kind of like the atmosphere that they create. i guess you could get them all, but once you realize what they are and let them stay where they are creates an even darker atmosphere. that is why i think i went a little overboard.

i like my EB and AV also. but i would never face them alone. that is why i provide help.

i love my little nightmares! they're even scarier when they come in a large group. running in single file. that was a touch i could not ever hope for, except by accident.

i will give your arc a whirl sometime tommorrow, i think. i have couple in front. thank you for your feedback.

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ok guess ill be first!

"Arrowyn's Zombie Apocalypse" i cant recall the arc # as i am at work atm

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ok, i am not sure what you are looking for me to do. your mission is not anything yet. it is just there to check out your zombies and kill a couple along the way. i will be honest with you... you freely admit there is no story. once i got one shotted by one of your extreme bosses, which i came back to and worked hard to kill and only have it rez, i lost all motivation to go further. i stealthed the rest of the way just to see the final boss. once i saw that he was a EB/AV, i quit. i was not going to die again to find out that he is set on extreme.

since this is not a mission to be taken seriously yet, i am not going to point out your typos. the mission is riddled with them. you need someone to proof everything for you. which is what i have done for my own. i have a friend that i pestered for a week because they were good at it. or run your text through a spell check on word.

what you need to decide here is what you want. if this will be a kill zombie-fest, with everything set at standard for minions, hard for LTs, and extreme for bosses, you need to advertise it as such. also put in an AV alert. but i am pretty sure not many will play and fewer will finish. if you are going to put in a real story that you want to people to play all the way through, you will need to reconsider your custom group. work them so they are playable, not just ridiculously hard. most people do not mind challenge, but they would prefer it to be fair too. your zombies are very lopsided.

i still want your review, but i will hold off with you until you have something that i can play. something challenging but fair. i would like a real story too, please.

ok let's gets this ball rolling...

Arc #119664 - The MiniMech Cometh - Hess TF Mini-Sequel

nice job lycaeus. let me run few a couple of quick things before i go into a little more depth. these are just things i noticed along the way.

in mission 1...
in the inital brief it says "old history" which sounds strange to me... maybe "old news"?

since i am not familiar with the ernesto hess tf i do not know how he talks. he talks in a similar fashion? in short, clipped military/business-like sentences? if he does, or that is what you were trying to achieve then i do not have a problem with it. they were a little incomplete and short, otherwise. just wondering...

defences? or defenses? on the 1st mission brief... one is a more UK spelling... up to you.

the mission nav bar says defeat malta observer. was that in the mission brief? maybe let that remain a mystery until you encounter it?

your boss defeat text and the NPC character text are almost identical. maybe vary it a little? "too late, hero, we already..." or take out one...

in the mission complete pop up "anonymous" was spelled wrong.

after the second mission...

why would you not give the note to hess right away? just curious? it seemed a bit stiltedbecause he had already debriefed you, it seems like time has passed in between

when i defeated the hephaestus class titan i find a "bunch of stuff" or something like that... should that not be a clue maybe? otherwise i would have missed it in the combat clutter.

otherwise not too much to comment on what is a pretty good arc. looks pretty well edited and scrubbed.


i ran this solo with my lvl 30 AR/dev blaster on heroic. this is a very well written story arc and i liked it. the dialogue was good and everything had descriptions and some were fairly in-depth. i like a good mystery. i am not sure i ever ran the ernesto hess tf, if i did it was a very long time ago. just saying this because i did not really know the background for some of thins story. you did cover it briefly in the initial brief. i did not have any problems until the final mission, it was pretty smooth running.

i did appreciate the words of warning in the initial brief as to what to prepare for, that hardly ever happens. it was helpful, because with the malta you do need some break frees.

as i said... it was smooth going until the final mission. when we met the final boss the allies kept running away, though there is probably nothing you can do about it... i think it was because of the firethrower, that scattered the allies all over the place. i spent a lot of time running to pick them up. unfortunately i died 5 times. it might have been the combat mixture of the allies. malachite was a dual blades and the other broadsword? even the LT ally lived, but mostly because she ran away and i did not find her until afterwards. maybe you can change one of the allies to a controller type or a blaster type. the two EB allies were heavy damage, but they hardly ever took aggro in that large crowd. when i would hit the EB, i would take aggro and that is why i died so often. now that i think of it definitely a controller ally would have been nice. i like arcs that ramp up in difficulty as the missions progress. the missions were about even in difficulty and then WHAM!, you hit a brick wall in the last mission. maybe make your malta bosses a bit harder, they were all LTs for me, and maybe knock your AV down to EB and the allies to boss... it was too much and with a medium strength blaster it was pretty overwhelming. allies can help, but they need to be the right type of ally. something to draw aggro and/or hold aggro. usually i do not have proglems soloing with that blaster. i did there.

all in all, the story progressed nicely and i enjoyed it. you just need to do some tweaking with the final mission. otherwise it works well. i would play it again if you adjusted things in the last mission.

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However, I just wanted to jump in and say to my favorite mushmouth late nite critter, I'll help :3

-C.A.

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and if you want to help review some feel free. i am sure people are looking for plays as well as reviews. trolling for underplayed arcs has forced my hand... ;p

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I will give Hero Therapy! (TM) a try, but it may take a couple of days to get to. Feel free o wait to do mine until I post a review, if you like.

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same for me since i am out of town...

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ok guess ill be first!

"Arrowyn's Zombie Apocalypse" i cant recall the arc # as i am at work atm

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i will put you next in the queue. if you can give one my arcs a run after you get back from work? it would be greatly appreciated.

can you find the arc #? though i guess arrowyn should be sufficient... but sometimes it is a pain to find anything with this search.