TeChameleon

I've sent you some (relatively) detailed feedback via PM, Rose; if you'd like to try any one of my arcs (or all of them), go right ahead- the names and numbers are in my signature

... whoa. Welcome back, Essex. Been a while since I last saw you (assuming my memory isn't playing tricks on me and I just think I've seen you before... pretty sure we've interacted, though <.<).

And yeah, good luck getting out of the costume editor once i16 hits. I took a quick peek at the open beta a few minutes ago, and it was an effort of will to stop screwing around with it even after the minute or two I tested >.<

Oh yeh- one other one of mine- my Peacebringer screams "Photon Stupids, AWAY!" whenever I release my... well, I'm sure you can guess. Much love for the retarded glowing tribbles of doom

I'm not positive, but I seem to remember hearing that the bolero/wings combo actually causes problems within the game/database/whatever- it's not just 'clipping'. Could be wrong, of course, but that's the way I remember it going down.

I'm rather fond of the one on my Blaster main, cheerfully and blatantly stolen from Terry Pratchett- "Morituri Nolumus Mori!", which is bad Discworld pidgin-Latin for "We who are about to die, don't want to!"

So, checking out The Next War on Drugs... heh. Funny to see someone other than me using BABs as a contact, although to be fair, mine is more about the fallout from the last war on drugs... you'll be getting my usual stream-of-semiconsciousness review, where you get my thoughts pretty much as I do. Running as Flashpoint Zeo, my level 16 Fire/Fire Tank... that I created on October 31st, 2004 >.>

Anyways, moving right along-

MISSION ONE:
- Hmm... mission briefing is written well enough, but somehow BABs 'voice' seems a bit off. Not sure why (although the dialogue could stand another comma or two, it comes off as a bit breathless right now).

- Only got one of the optional sides- it was a nice touch, though (the 'Stolen SWAT van' one).

-... wait, rescuing one cop was enough to turn the tide when the PPD were being overwhelmed..? O.o Uh...

- Minor quibble- is 'intoxicated' the right word to be using for gangers on a drug high? I don't know for sure, but it doesn't sound quite right...

MISSION TWO:

- "'all hands on deck' response"? Seems an oddly... nautical... turn of phrase for the Brawler to pull out :/

- Nice buildup on the closeout of the briefing, though. More info on the bodyguard might be nice, but otherwise it's pretty cool (i.e. if the bodyguard was a super as well, knowing that he got taken out would be a useful warning)

- Hmm... okay, why is this timed? I understand that it's urgent, but BABs never said anything about a ransom to be paid before this time 'or else', or anything to that effect...

- ... okay, these clues are more confusing than enlightening. Hopefully the Brawler has more to say on this...

- And, uhm, not so much. Hmm.

MISSION THREE:

- Time for a little sanctioned B&E, I guess.

- Uhm... okay, really not sure what I'm supposed to be doing here; I can't click on any of the glowies I've found thus far, and Officer Martin doesn't seem especially interested in following me, despite having a little green arrow on the map :/

- Hrm, alrighty- found the missing glowie (that's a rather paranoid clerk, although the Swift reference was a nice touch). On to the next glowie in the chain. Honestly, this is a bit on the slow side thus far- nothing to do but run around (a LOT, if you missed the first glowie >.<) and occasionally click.

- Oooookay. The missing forensics kit is not only in the garbage, but under a bunch of junk? And we're calling what I'm doing with it 'borrowing' now? Er... why is it in the garbage?

- Wait, the cops didn't search the area with the next glowie, or one of them did, and they're just a bent cop? It's a bit unclear, and it's certainly more than a little odd, given that I've seen two or three cops wander through the area, and Officer Martin was standing... y'know, right there.

- Uhm... am I really supposed to believe that the PPD are going to be this sloppy, especially in a case as high-profile as the murder of an elected official? I mean, missing material evidence that's basically right out in the open? Mind you, the line about my huge, currently-on-fire Tanker dusting paper for prints amused me somewhat...

- It would read a lot cleaner if BABs had a comma in the 'that was solid investigative work $name' line- same problem has cropped up at least once before. There's "I'm saying this really really fast and not even stopping to breathe or pass out because I'm in a rush" lack-of-commas in other places as well. Maybe try reading the dialogue out loud, to see where it would pause naturally?

MISSION FOUR:

- Uh... Tsoo? Wait, fake Tsoo? The hell?

- Storm Dragon had some cute dialogue, but once again suffering from lack-of-comma breathlessness.

- Erm... these clues seem to be contradictory- Storm Dragon talked about the city using 'me' for eviction, but the second clue talks about him saying that the 'new owners' would be evicting them soon.

- Why is the Brawler suddenly talking like... well, the Brawler? It's like he abruptly changed voices for this one debriefing :s

MISSION FIVE:

- Hmm... interesting hook. Kinda like a reverse-Punisher, heh...

- First clue- 'there's something at the bottom of this box'- shouldn't that be 'these boxes', since there's a whole pile?

- ... if this 'mysterious green liquid' is actually 'dyne, I'm going to be a bit annoyed, given that that's the only green liquid I've been dealing with this entire time (really, 'mysterious'? Really?) >.<

- Hmm- didn't think to check eariler, but don't the Private Security Guards deserve a custom bio, given that they're not actually in the 'City of Villains'?

- "Something stinks in this fridge"? Gee, could it have something to do with the biohazard symbol on it? >.>

- Hmm... well, that explains a few things. Although the 'Middleman' trying to riot-baton my eight-foot flaming monstrosity of a Tanker into submission was rather amusing.

- "This may have serious ramifications"? Uhm... why is my character internally monologuing the blindingly obvious?

- Hmm... I like the debriefing- BABs finally 'sounds' right, and it gives a nice 'to be continued' without leaving things feeling incomplete.

OVERALL:

The writing was fairly tight and well done, with the exception of the strange reluctance to use commas, even when they're needed. The characterization, once it stabilized a bit, was good (although you may want to double-check the earlier missions for that- it was kind of a rocky start), and the missions, overall, were interesting, although not fascinating. In all honesty, I'm kind of torn about Mission Three; it really did feel like I was investigating something, as far (and maybe even a little farther) than the CoH would allow. On the flip side, it was... well, kind of boring, and led to a couple of odd moments that either didn't make sense at the time, or didn't make sense in hindsight.

Some of the plot holes are explained in hindsight, although it might make more sense to hear somebody else complain about the missing kit, since if I remember right, the one kvetching about it probably wouldn't want it found; and I'm a bit surprised at how apathetic he was towards my presence there, when he would have been perfectly within his authority to give me the boot right then and there without anyone batting an eye. Also, that "Ferrous Mantis" guy was a horribly jarring note, and made absolutely no sense within the lore as a member of the Tsoo- you might be able to get away with that kind of crap as a Hellion, but the Tsoo are a bit more pragmatic (and ruthless) than that. It was like a clown suddenly riding through the set of the O.C. for no discernable reason, screaming "LAUGH AT ME!" in the middle of a tense moment :/

I gave it a three and a half stars (rounded up); a little tightening (really really needs more commas), and a bit of polish (poke the more implausible bits a little), and I think you're good to go; final grade: Four Stars.

... *points to sig*

And you should keep the names of those people handy, Flechette- that kind of firepower could be fun, especially as you hit the post-nuke levels... :crazy:

Hmm... I've done some recent work on my 10-14 arc, "Trollbane" (number's in my sig); I'm not sure I've gotten all the mechanical bugs out (I changed a few things under i15, with the new options available), but I'd appreciate a run- see what you think!

*shrug*

Not sure what to say, Sam- it may simply be that your predeliction towards grandiose stories has doomed you from the outset; the scale of City of Heroes simply does not lend itself very well to worlds-destroying drama, at least if you want to have your character be a 'local'.

My own characters pretty much run the gamut from one end to the other- on the one hand, my main, Energon X, originated firmly in-universe (although he's Canadian, like myself, rather than a Paragon native), and gained his powers in the time-honoured fashion of standing too close to the wrong explosion (in a S.E.R.A.P.H. lab, no less). My redside main, Mad Doctor Dingbot, on the other hand, originates form out-of-universe- he's an escaped cartoon character from a popular Paragon City children's adventure cartoon... who got into the Rogue Isles via The Television.

*waves hand* It may be that part of your difficulty is creating your characters, then attempting to shoehorn them into Paragon or the Isles. After all, if they've got massive, complicated, 'wilderness'-necessitating backgrounds, then of course they're not going to be a comfortable fit. If you take a look at the existing lore, though, and say 'what kind of stories could come out of this that I'd be interested in exploring?', you might have an easier time of it.

Huh- best of luck, A_C.

Couple of fragments of advice from me, although a lot has been covered already; if you go after your studies with the same intensity you seem to bring to the table to a lot of stuff... make sure you make time to relax. You can be 'handling' your coursework without difficulty, but be spiralling into burnout at the same time, because 'college' has become an obsessive, single-focus task. Get away from things every so often, especially if, like me, you can hit the "THE WALLS ARE CLOSING IN!" point with deadlines >.O

If you have even mild difficulties with your hearing... bring a decent recording device of some sort into class, especially to start with; enough profs have a horrible habit of mumbling that even people with exceptional hearing can run into difficulties, and you don't want to miss the content of the first three lecture because you have no idea what Professor Mushmouth-McDoesn't-Hand-Out-Outlines said.

Anyways, take care of yourself, and try not to de-orbit anything onto my house, eh?

... actually, I said I went back and edited it before I actually did- the text is all just white now.

And I 'messed' with the colours since it's a fairly standard RP technique that I use to indicate that a character has a voice that's unusual in some fashion- one speaks in light purple, another in Orange-Red, that sort of thing.

EDIT- Oh, wait- think I missed something; the bio was just a straight copy-paste from the old NA Roleplaying board, where the background wasn't nearly so dark, so the black text didn't matter- I quoted it so I could keep my formatting, and the colour kind of came with.

Well... this is the background of my Warshade; it's quoted from an RP thread from a while back (he's talking to Acid Zero, one of DeviousMe's characters, if anybody cares). Pretty sure it qualifies as tragic. Also long. Very, very long >.>

You know, I was actually idly wondering the same thing about the oddly high number of snitch-callers. Not that it matters, particularly.

I fall quite firmly into the anti-farming camp- as in, "I won't do it", not that I care whether or not you do it aside from certain specific exceptions that I'll cover in a moment- since it has, as far as I personally am concerned, all the entertainment value of 'hit button when light is on, get food pellet'.

I object quite strenuously to farming when it does one of three things:

1. Clogs broadcast/request with neverending farm-spam along with the pushy imbeciles who won't take 'bugger off' for an answer when insisting that since I happen to be in the same zone as them, I must be just dying to be on their farm (thankfully, i16 will hopefully cut back on that, since it will be irrelevant).

2. Fills the AE list with eighteen quadrillion useless identical farms. My playtime has been sharply limited of late, and I resent having it wasted since the cleverdicks who think they're getting away with something have disguised their farm with a thin, but plausible, story (yes, that's actually happened to me. I was not impressed). And before some smartaleck gets on me, yes, it has been limited enough that even the time wasted loading in and out the farm I don't want to do is noticeable to the point of being aggravating.

3. AE Babies. The idiot manchild leavings of farm-fillers, who don't know how to play, don't want to learn, and insult you when you attempt to tell them that there is more to the game than sitting in the Atlas Park AE building, or worse yet, can't figure out how to do anything other than sit in the AP AE. Whether you like to admit it or not, taking new players and molding them into AE babies because you happen to want filler right then, you are hurting the game.

Making sure that the vast majority of new players' first experience of the game is standing on the same damn map killing the same damn enemies until their brains turn to pudding and leak out their ears is not a good way to ensure the long-term health of the game. And I don't like having to put up with them, which is a bit frustrating, as I usually enjoy interacting with new players- the shiny hasn't worn off for them, and it can be quite refreshing to team with them as they see things for the first time.

So... to conclude this long-winded half-rant... I don't care if you farm. You can push the button for your pellets all day long, if you like; doesn't bug me. But this is an MMO; you are in a large, cooperative/competitive environment, and your actions will have effects on me and others. I don't think it's all that much to ask that you take that into consideration when forming teams and building yet another Maniac Slammer farm (really, why the hell do we need so many of those?).

P.S.- If you don't mold AE babies, don't build your own farms, and don't spam for filler, then... uh... this wasn't directed at you. At all. I don't care what you're doing, and don't really need to hear about it.

Well, while I don't necessarily agree that Canon = guaranteed suckage, my arc "Small Fears" fits the bill for the most part (there's a handful of standard mobs, but they're rarely-seen ones, and have a perfectly legitimate reason for being there). The number is in my sig- if you enjoy it, lemme know. If you don't, I don't want to hear about it... okay, okay, kidding- let me know what you think! It's 'done' for the most part, but if I think I can improve it, I will.

Complete revamp of all the old content, on both sides. Fix the celphone-number-giving issue blueside, either get rid of or heavily, heavily revamp the Hazard zones, give Redside some new zones (and access to the Shadow Shard- my brute wants the Rularuu axe without having to farm the same stupid mission over and over and over and over for the three bosses that spawn there &gt;.&lt, fix the redside and blueside badge stupidities (Longbow, Outcast bosses and needing a PvP badge for an accolade, anyone?).

Fix the mission chains blueside; get rid of the 'we won't tell you anything until you've gone to see the Security Chief/PvP Zone rep/whatever other stupid thing we can think of'... or better yet, tie it in to Vet badges. The 3-Month badge makes it so you never have to see those people ever again.

Get rid of redundant contacts blueside- there's too many that give the same rather crappy quest mini-arc, and no real way of telling without memorizing who gives what.

I could go on, but I'm sure you get the idea.

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Hmm... wonder if Axis Amerika was created when Ubelmann succeeded?

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No. Axis American is what was in the game from Issue 1 until Issue 3 when the Council took over the 5th Column in the game (and in the lore). Excluding Striga every instance of being involved with the Council on the Hero side, it was orginally done with the 5th Column.

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Uhm... I meant lore-wise. I know that Axis Amerika was in the game from i1-3 (I started in the tail end of i2), I was just thinking out loud- it's a way that having the 5th Column still so prominent fifty years after their actual usefulness ended (as an infiltration unit in WWII) makes some kind of sense- Ubelmann, as a Fifth Columnist, provided information that turned the tide of the war, thus gaining the Column a permanent place in the third Reich of Axis Amerika.

Hmm... maybe I should finish my conquer-your-own-island arc that I've been poking at off and on and publish it... might be entertaining

... of course, before I do that, I should stop being lazy and fix my "I tried new stuff for i15 and broke my arc" arc first &gt;.&gt;

Also, Reichsmann having a "Fifth Column" log on his chest is no surprise- the old Axis Amerika map was liberally festooned with Fifth Column banners, which actually makes some sense- you're in the alternate Paragon City, and the timeline appears to have diverged during WWII, when the Column was active in the States. Hmm... wonder if Axis Amerika was created when Ubelmann succeeded?