Super_Tim

Here we go, I think I've done it (probably not).

Enter: Mysterious Guy (I renamed it)
Length: Medium (a Bank, a small lab, and a smallish warehouse.)
Morality: Heroic
Description: It contains more answers this time around. You find out about both the Mysterious Guy and his mysterious army. You stop a bank robbery, save a laboratory, and stop a mysterious maniac in this action-packed, campy dramedy.

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I'll be reviewing Radionuclide's arc here.

Also, please check out my fixed-up arc...

Mysterious Circumstances: Redux
Arc ID: 7730
Length: Medium (1 Bank, 1 Casino, and a smallish warehouse.)
Morality: Heroic
Description: A new villain group has emerged in Paragon City. In this arc you must stop them from robbing a bank and fight their mysterious leader.

It may sound pretty dull, but it's a comedy.

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Writing this as I run the missions:
Mission 1:
1. LOVE the minion costumes, not so fond of the minion names...would have liked to guess their powers vs being told what they are by the baddie's name.
2. The Lt.'s give a decent fight
3. Good opening mish for the arc..short but gives you a good taste of what might be coming...

Mission 2:
1. Send off message has a typo in the first word, should be Hey not He. Also a typo in the 2nd line it should be reschedule.
2. The 2nd line of the send off message could use a little clarification...I know that he's talking to someone else other than me but it just reads strange.
3. decent fight with the EB, the Lt.'s end draining made it a bit more interesting when the ambush showed up. The bombs felt like a bit of an after thought to the fight.
4. would have liked to have seen a clue as to who these villains are somewhere in this mish..all still a little too vague. might want to add some tid bits of info to keep the player interested in the story.
5. there is a typo in the return to contact message, should be bit of not bitof.

Mission 3:
1. contact mission briefing needs a little more fleshing out. maybe some more background as to why the main baddie is a nut job....what did he do that gave him that rep? did he drown a bunch of kittens? give me more to go on so i want to take him down. especially since this is the last mish..
2. the EB needs more dialog...he seems like the type that wouldn't shut up, someone that really monologues.
3. fight itself wasn't bad..again the thing that made it interesting was the Lt's end drain.

Overall:
You have a good base and an interesting premise, it just needs to flesh it out. Give the player more of a story. I still don't know where this mysterious villain group came from or what they are all about. Why do they have those uniforms? Is there a theme to the villain group? flesh it out more and you could have a real winner here.


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Thanks a lot for the crit. I've already mentioned the typos. I'm glad you like the costumes . I'll work out a backstory and fix up the names. I'm not a great namer (Mysterious Guy (which is the actual name for my actual villain), Super Tim (which is the actual name for my actual hero), and, of course, those awful minion names). Honestly, I published it prematurely. I hadn't played the 2nd mission at all. I thought the map was bigger. I'll change up the second mission and maybe do away with the bombs. I'll try to throw in a clue or two to these guys' true identities.

On a seperate note,

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As for the identity of the captured, I think I dropped enough hints (subtle and not so subtle) to let people figure it out.

In your opinion, would this be something I should change, meaning to hide the identity more.

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I think it might be better for the story, but it's your call.

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I'll be reviewing Radionuclide's arc here.

Also, please check out my fixed-up arc...

Mysterious Circumstances: Redux
Arc ID: 7730
Length: Medium (1 Bank, 1 Casino, and a smallish warehouse.)
Morality: Heroic
Description: A new villain group has emerged in Paragon City. In this arc you must stop them from robbing a bank and fight their mysterious leader.

It may sound pretty dull, but it's a comedy.

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Hi Super_Tim. I just did your arc. I loved the camp. Might suggest a bit more of it. It did make me chuckle a few times. So, you might take that as a sucess.

Couple of typos (don't we all do those?):
Mission two send off -
He (thinking this should be Hey)
reschedual (reschedule)

On the mission two return to contact text there is a missing space between bit of.


I'm looking forward to arc #2. Where we flight Really Mysterious Guy.


--Rad

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Yeah, I just played through and noticed the typos. Thanks for the review. My next arc will involve time travel.

Spoilers Ahead

-Mission was short, but that's not bad in a 5 mission arc. You had a small misspelling on your first clue ('on' instead of 'one') no biggie.

-The opening dialouge on the 2nd mission has another misspelling ('randsom' instead of 'ransom') no biggie. Second mission was definantly longer, but it was good. Nice ambush at the end.

-The third mission went pretty quickly for me. A good solid mission.

-The fourth mission was another solid mission.

-I saw the twist coming as far as the identity of the captured. I'll be honest, I didn't complete the final mission. I can't go 1 on 1 with an EB.

Overall, it was a solid arc. I'd give it 4 out of 5. It didn't have that 'WOW' factor, but it was VERY solid. A little elbow grease (and some help with the EB) and it's 5 of 5 for sure.

Also, please check out my fixed-up arc...

Mysterious Circumstances: Redux
Arc ID: 7730
Length: Medium (1 Bank, 1 Casino, and a smallish warehouse.)
Morality: Heroic
Description: A new villain group has emerged in Paragon City. In this arc you must stop them from robbing a bank and fight their mysterious leader.

It may sound pretty dull, but it's a comedy.

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Mysterious Circumstances
Arc ID: 6750
Description: A new villain group has emerged in Paragon City. In this arc you must stop them from robbing a bank and fight their mysterious leader.


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The enemies are used very well, and nothing's too difficult--but it could use a little more story if you want to capture the comedy you were going for.

Overall average, simply because--while I know you were trying to go for a classic 1970's batman esque vibe... having Supertim along made the elite boss at the end too easy (but not having him would've made it impossible--even if you had to trick the villain into moving in range of Supertim (since Supertim wouldn't move to engage the villain).

A solid arc, overall, but a little more story would've made it worlds better.

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I went with a bit more story this time arond. Also, I had Super Tim set to 'fight defensive' which was probably the problem. I weakened Super Tim a bit, but he'll probably attack Mysterious Guy now, so hopefully I've worked out the kinks. I'll probably have it re-posted pretty soon.

I'm not sure there was a lot wrong with it. Also, my ratings reflect my experience. It may be, and probably is, what a lot would consider a 5 out of 5. I would have probably had more fun if I had run it with a team.

Spoilers Below

-Alrighty, the first mission seemed standard, but it had a cool twist, which I liked a lot.

-Second mission was pretty cool, especially with how Dr. Aeon was hiding.

-The Viruses in the next mission were challanging for a squishy like me. The incursions at the end of the mission were cool, but they spawned right around me, which almost killed me. The viruses with force powers made me remember why I play a scrapper.

-Liked the idea of collecting drones before fighting the EB.

Really cool concept. Good execution. Solid 4 of 5.

Also, thanks for the comment Poptart. I'll be expanding that arc. Watch out for Mysterious Circumstances: Redux!


I open the floor to anyone who'd like to post an arc.

So I guess it wasn't bugged. I guess I just messed up, then.

I'm writing this as I play through. SPOILERS PROBABLY AHEAD! I should have realized it would be a villain arc by the name. I was doing fine in the first mish until the lvl jumped up on me. I'm squishy, though, so that's to be expected. I'm having trouble finding the last part, but that's not really your fault, I'm a bad finder. Yup, found it in a really obvious place.

-The first mission was long, but well put together. The map was good. It was at times challanging, but that's a good thing.

The second mission starts with a battle, which I like. More battles.
-Second mission was really good. The battles between Arachnos and Longbow gave it a cool atmosphere and the named Lt. fights were cool.

-Third mission was also cool. The main problem I had with it was like 5 of the terminals were all in one room. I liked getting a cool looking ally, but unfortunately he died.

-I was flying around in the fourth mission when I got mapserved. Hopefully I don't fail. Mission 4 was good once I realized you could enter the warehouse I'm pretty dumb.

-5th mission was also cool. I'm wondering, though, Saffron was mentioned, but was never a boss. The last 2 missions have Fuscia as a boss.

Overall, It was very cool. There are a lot of people who think you can't rate anything a 5 because nothing is perfect, but I disagree. Your arc may not be perfect, but it is really entertaining. I was a little hesitant to go into a 5 mission arc, but I'm glad I did.

I almost forgot!

Mysterious Circumstances
Arc ID: 6750
Length: Medium (It's actually pretty short.)
Morality: Heroic
Description: A new villain group has emerged in Paragon City. In this arc you must stop them from robbing a bank and fight their mysterious leader.

It may sound pretty dull, but it's a comedy.

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[u]Arc[u]: 'Small Fears'
Arc ID: 6528
Length: Medium
Missions: 3 (nothing major- medium is a fairly accurate description)

Description: No matter how happy your childhood, there are always a few corners of darkness, little pockets of black fear that every child knows. And now those shadows are expanding. Something is clawing out of the lost childhood of Paragon. Are you ready? Ready to confront the forgotten fears of the nursery?

((It's a horror-themed arc; I really have no idea why that popped out of my brain, but it did; feel free to absolutely savage it, since horror is way outside my normal purview, and it's open to question whether or not I have the faintest clue what I'm doing with it :/))

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I think the first mission could be bugged.

x<(spoilers maybe)>x
I had both kids following me, but when I took them both to the exit it said I still had 1 kid to save.

On a seperate note, I like the look of the monsters. My favorite was the Hallwy Monster.

50 in 302 hours. BOOYAH!