I'm a girl playing a girl, though don't RP much. I've actually had people surprised when, as playing my female character, I mention my fiancee... I can't help but laugh when my teammates are like "you're REALLY a girl!?"
I've never had anyone angry at me for using wrong pronouns. If a character is female, it's only appropriate to call her a "she," since that is technically the face that player is presenting to the world. All they have to do is mention they'd prefer to be called a he (or whatever else) if that's the case
I have several male friends with female characters, and they never minded if they were called "she" since it's always in reference to the character herself, rather than the person behind her.
